What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 14 July 2012: Good for you! I'm glad you called the place. You did the right thing.
As for asking for help, well sometimes that too, is the right thing to do. You already KNEW the right thing to do, you just need to learn to trust your instincts.
And you... (read in full...)
What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 8 July 2012: I think the part about his GF's snooping is BALONEY, again he is blaming other people for his behavior and for his LACK of it.
I say this, do not reply, do not feel "sorry" for him.
Why not go to the range (bring your Dad if possible), see w... (read in full...)
What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 6 July 2012: I would ring the Archery place and let them know, and I would keep going. I would not let some creep keep me from doing what I love.
If he tried to be "friendly" just walk away. And I do suggest that you ask for a lane or target area away from him... (read in full...)
Is is it ok to ask a guy out while he's still dating someone else?
Q. Hi there. Okay, I've been texting this guy my friend is setting me up with, but the guy already has a girlfriend. I do really like him, and my question is is it ok to ask a guy out while he's still dating someone else. Their relationship is rocky ac...
A. 4 July 2012:
I would ask that "mate" of yours why. But it doesn't hurt that you define your own set of morals and use your common sense.
Just because she thinks you two might hit it off doesn't make it right. I'm a little surprised that you can see that on ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting to this, or are my feelings atleast a little justified?
Q. My boyfriend of three years has recently downloaded pictures of naked women to his phone. We live together and have a child together so privacy is not the issue here, and I was not intentionally snooping on his phone. He had taken a picture of our s...
A. 4 July 2012: Have you asked him WTF is up with the naked pictures? As much as I would guess that the pictures aren't there to upset your or make you feel bad, I still question why anyone needs naked photos on their phone.
As for your own insecuri... (read in full...)
Who did my wife really lose her virginity to? Her old boyfriend or me?
Q. my wife and I have been married for 2 years now, and have been together for 4 years total. When we met we were both virgins and lost our virginity to each other. At least that is what I have always thought as she told me she was a virgin. Recently I ...
A. 4 July 2012: Physically and theoretically, she lost it to her ex.
Mentally and emotionally, she lost it to you.
Either way, I don't even see the point in debating it between you. It's not like it is something that can be changed or that actually ALTERS ... (read in full...)
What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 4 July 2012: You wrote a lot more polite e-mail then I would have.. :) Good for you.
Yes, I think you did well in your answer, you didn't make him look bad (even if we all think he does lol) You didn't go into specific details, but you were polite and to the p... (read in full...)
Is is it ok to ask a guy out while he's still dating someone else?
Q. Hi there. Okay, I've been texting this guy my friend is setting me up with, but the guy already has a girlfriend. I do really like him, and my question is is it ok to ask a guy out while he's still dating someone else. Their relationship is rocky ac...
A. 4 July 2012: It doesn't matter if his relationship is in the dumps, he is CURRENTLY seeing/dating someone else and he OUGHT to be off limits dating-wise.
In my honest opinion is it NOT OK to ask a guy/girl who is in a relationship out on a date. A DATE imp... (read in full...)
My girlfriend said I can sleep with prostitutes if I wear a condom
Q. I have the most loveliest girlfriend in the world. She is so sweet and adores me. I love her so much and I can't imagine not being without her. Then 2 days ago she said to me she allows me to have sex with prostitutes if I wear a condom. She sai...
A. 4 July 2012: Just because she "allows" it doesn't mean you HAVE to do it, does it?
I'm kind of guessing that she "allowed" previous BF to do as they pleased in an attempt to keep the relationship going. Why she or her previous BFs think it's "normal" in any r... (read in full...)
My sister-in-law's absolute indifference and apathy towards my wife and me is very upsetting
Q. I try to be nice to my sister-in-law, but her absolute indifference and apathy towards my wife and me is upsetting. My wife and I recently got back from a trip to Europe with my wife's mom. When we got back we wanted to meet with my sister-in...
A. 4 July 2012: Obviously she isn't a very emphatic person and don't seem to care much about other. I would call her emotionally stunted? Maybe she is picking up on your hostility?
So, knowing that, cut the contact to a minimum, but let your wife visit/sp... (read in full...)
My wife never buys me gifts that I like. Am I making a mountain out of a mole hill here?
Q. My wife of 20 years never buys me gifts I like and never has. This may seem like a small matter, but it is a festering issue in our marriage. She says that I am unappreciative and that she can't do any right by me. From my perspective, I feel l...
A. 4 July 2012: My husband used to be like your wife. My DH has absolutely NO present buying skills. UNLESS I spell it out, say THIS is all I want.. insert link, cutout from magazine or what not.
The alternative is to buy yourself the things you want. TREAT yo... (read in full...)
From FWB to relationship back to FWB?
Q. Friends with benefits to relationship then back to FWB? I met a single guy 6 years ago,we chatted started seeing one another once a week,he used to come to my house,i wouldnt allow anymore than once a week as i had my son living with me and thats ...
A. 4 July 2012: I think it would be a mistake. If he can't make it work in a relationship WHY waste any more of your time with him? Honestly, having a FWB is NOT going to make him realize what he is missing.. or make him grow up.... (read in full...)
An attached man is giving me alot of attention and it makes me feel good. Is it wrong to feel this way?
Q. hey guys i really need advice im panicking and cant understand why ive worked with a guy for 18 months and in the last 7 months weve become friends and told each other stuff but in the last 2 weeks hes confided in me about some major stuff. he...
A. 4 July 2012: As long as YOU can keep it platonic and not let it go beyond friendship I think it's alright.
But I think that I personally would back off a little, he IS in a relationship and SHOULD discuss these things with the GF not you.
Keep it profe... (read in full...)
If I haven't had sex in years, would I be a virgin again?
Q. i have sex when im only in grade school.. but after that i never commit sex again, now im 22 years old.. did my virginity win back after so many years?...
A. 4 July 2012: No, there is no "do-over". You are just sexually inexperienced.
... (read in full...)
Is this the behaviour of someone who is mentally disturbed?
Q. what do you think of this behaviour? Is this person mentally dirturbed? I just met a guy to whom i gave my mobile number. He immediately started to text me. He said he was really smitten by me. I barely know him but he started to tell me that he ...
A. 4 July 2012: He just used you for sex. Doesn't really make him mentally ill, just amoral, horny and selfish.
What makes me wonder is WHY you met up with him after he told you he was married....... (read in full...)
What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 4 July 2012: His latest email shows what a passive aggressive A-hole he really is.. Look at his e-mail.. It's all about HOW YOU made him feel and how WRONG YOU are...
NONE of his behavior is what I would assume as "normal" for someone offering friendsh... (read in full...)
Breaking up with someone who thinks everything is fine. How do I do that?
Q. I'm onl with my guy for 3 months and I'm already considering breaking up. He does not respect me, emotionally abuses me, says hurtful things that are destructive to my self-image, controls the things I do or what I wear. But how should I break it to ...
A. 3 July 2012: The sooner you do it the better. He needs to figure out that his behavior is not right. And you, deserve a better guy.
I would just call him and tell him that it isn't working for you and that you are letting him go.... (read in full...)
I'm starting to give up on women!
Q. I hate how women are so complicated, i think that everyone has relationships in the past that alter their veiws on other potential parnters, as how to act and how to behave and what not to do. I find that saying so true nowadays that women are so ...
A. 3 July 2012: You are comparing apples to hand grenades, my friend.
Most young teenage girls are JUST as confused as you are when it comes to dating/boys/relationships, it's something that has quite an odd learning curb. We do (for the most part) get better w... (read in full...)
What are the unwritten rules about living together?
Q. what are the rules of moving in togather? Does the man always have to tell the wife/gf where he is going,what hes doing, vice verser with the girl, does she tell her man where she is going if she steps out the door, visitin rules who can visit who ...
A. 3 July 2012: I think it's an EXCELLENT topic! And one you really should sit your bf/gf down and talk about.
With my first BF we had a eraser-board in the kitchen where we put notes to each other when our schedules ran in a way that we didn't see each other (t... (read in full...)
If you stop doing meth, do the mouth sores go away?
Q. My girlfriend did meth and I'm worried about her she has a few sores in her mouth , do they go away on there own if she stops ? ...
A. 3 July 2012: I have never done Meth, but I have heard of Meth Mouth. Rather unpleasant.
I hope your GF quit that stuff.
She could try and gargle with a saltwater solution (it will sting) but it cleans out the mouth and sores pretty fast.
(One to two tea s... (read in full...)
Phone calls about boyfriend visting ex wife?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years now, he was married before and he had affairs when married to his ex wife,some one will only ring me up every now and again and say he has been to the ex wifes house and also the lady he had the affair with ...
A. 3 July 2012: Have you told your BF about these phone-calls?
If they keep calling I suggest next time you tell the person to stop calling you or you will contact the police, see what happens. If they do call again, call the police and ask what you need to ... (read in full...)
When I look at my crush he looks away?
Q. Okay, so I asked a question about my crush... But things have changed since I posted that question. He like looks at me, but when I look at him he looks away! What does this mean?...
A. 3 July 2012: 1. He is shy.
2. He got "caught" looking at you.
Who knows? Next time you look and he looks back just smile and see what he does.... (read in full...)
What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 3 July 2012: I forgot to add that I would make sure you parents or someone you trust knows when you are going to the range (or better yet, don't go alone) ALSO make sure you tell someone about this guy. You parents, friends so forth so his info is out there.
... (read in full...)
I can hear my parents having sex, and really would rather not
Q. Don't know whether this is the right site but I need some advice. I can constantly hear my parents having sex. I completely understand that this is a natural thing and I am happy that they are still in love and can still experience that together but ...
A. 3 July 2012: Headphones or move out.....
Honestly, I think it's great that they are still going at it. But I do understand that as their child that is not something you will want to listen too. ... (read in full...)
How to get rid of my down there odour?
Q. Every boy I have slept with (2 boys, which were relationships) and after the relationships had finished they would say that I smelled down below (of fish) I was so humiliated, I'm a very clean person, and take pride in my hygiene and appearance. But ...
A. 3 July 2012: Go see your doctor/GYN sounds like you have a Ph imbalance and this can be fixed easily, same for a yeast infection.
... (read in full...)
Our post lady ran over and killed our dog. Is there anything legally we can do?
Q. the post lady ran over my dog today at the back of my house. the front of the house was taken up with cars and we have a large backyard for trucks and vans for business. usually the post delivery people revere back out our driveway onto the road but ...
A. 3 July 2012: I'm sorry you lost your dog. Losing a 4 legged family member is never easy.
Maybe your dog shouldn't have been running loose (nor your nephew) in a place where cars drive? That is all I can think off.
I would contact a solicitor if you... (read in full...)
Is it a waste of money to get a celebrity's autograph?
Q. Does anyone think that it is a waste of money going to conventions to get a celebrities autograph and/or get a photo taken with them and go to a talk that some of them do infront of an audience?. I'm not sure if anyone here has ever been to these ...
A. 3 July 2012: For some it might be. Personally, I can't see what I would need an autograph for, but each to their own.
If you can afford to go see them and you enjoy this kind of thing, I see nothing wrong in it either.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend acts kind of strange about sex. Is he gay?
Q. My man prefers to masturbate while I am next to him sucking on his chest. I want him to have intercourse with me but he doesn't. He will only let me ride it and most of the time it is not that hard. He is 66 and I am 59. Do you think he might be ...
A. 3 July 2012: Nope, I think he might have a hard time keeping an erection during intercourse.
Do you get anything out of the sex with this guy?... (read in full...)
What started out innocent has turned into a trouble situation with a man old enough to be my father
Q. I got myself in a unhealthy situation. - Short version: I befriended a new member of the archery range I'm at. He's in his mid fifties. He assured me all he wanted was friendship. Stupid and naive as I was I accepted this. I even accepted a job o...
A. 3 July 2012: Honestly he almost sounds scary.
I think he is trying to see how far he can push you. I'm pretty sure that he's done this before to other young girls and getting the result he wanted (sex) or maybe he haven't succeeded yet and therefor pushing ... (read in full...)
He wants to be serious and then disappears!
Q. OK - met a guy on a dating site, and we met and things were great. Met again and he was REALLY positive about me - called me beautiful, attractive, great to be with (should have seen him for what he is then .....?) etc. and we planned to meet again ...
A. 2 July 2012: Drop him like it's hot.
I think he was hoping to charm you into bed asap and then skip to the next lady.
How can you stop feeling the way you do? By stop beating yourself up, you thought he could be a Keeper obviously he wasn't.. NEXT!
... (read in full...)
Can a marriage work with different hobbies/interests?
Q. Can a marriage work with different hobbies/interests? I just feel so lonely that all we do together is watch tv. Have talked and tried to arrange more things together but he just not interested. We agreed to a walk on the beach recently but it ...
A. 2 July 2012: Having different hobbies can surely work. I spend 1-2 hours a day in the gym, hubby spend hours playing online games. I paint, I volunteer.
However, what is going on with you two is not about hobbies, it's about lack of respect it seems.
... (read in full...)
I have a crush on him. Yet always he is IN a relationship. But he Does know I like him.
Q. I have a crush on this guy in my year. He knows I like him, but I don't know if he likes me. Since I told him, he doesn't act weird. I can never talk to him about it because he is always in a relationship. What do I do?...
A. 2 July 2012: Drop it, he knows and has done nothing.
Sorry, honey he is just not into you or he would have acted on it.
Stop wasting time on this crush.... (read in full...)
What can we do? I feel pressured into what names we should give our children
Q. I have recently become engaged with my boyfriend of 4 years and we've been having talks about when we'll start a family. He's named after his Father (who wasn't named after anybody) My partner's Grandfather was called a traditional name in the fami...
A. 2 July 2012: We chose to PICK the first names for our kids ourselves ( my husband and I each made a list of 10 names, we then swapped and crossed out what we didn't like and thus whittling the list down to 1 name)
Middle-names is where the "family" shows up... (read in full...)
My husband always has to run the show
Q. How can a man say he loves you and yet say such awful things? Is it a lack of self control? My husband thinks his job is do all the solving, planning, thinking and decision making. Whereas, I came from a family where the husband and wife worked as a ...
A. 2 July 2012: How long have you two been married? And is there some some of cultural thing going on with him?
Honestly, I would be out of there. This in not a marriage, it's a dictatorship. Can you imagine kids in this scenario?
... (read in full...)
He came home from a strip club wanting sex
Q. My boyfriend of over a year now came home the other night from hanging out with his friends that had come into town. I thought nothing of it, they usually just go out to eat or play video games, etc. But, when my boyfriend came home this last time, ...
A. 2 July 2012: I dated a guy who got horny every time he went to the gym. I used to think it was ridiculous, but I guess different things turn different people on.
I think you need to verbalize this ( I quote you)
" I don't want sex that starts from a strip... (read in full...)
Besides Erectile Dysfunction could my low Testoserone levels be affecting my sex appeal to women in a negative way?
Q. Hi, I really need some help, especially from someone in the medical profession or anyone who might know about this. I'm a perfectly healthy, pleasant, bright, socially active forty two year old guy. But I've never had a girlfriend. In all m...
A. 2 July 2012: I know here in the US there is a T-patch which is very successful.
And yes, you will need to talk to your doctor about this.
Women can't sense ED or Low T, but they can sense a guy who seems insecure. So in a sense the low T can "make" you s... (read in full...)
Are my friends right? Do I have no conscience? I slept with a married guy.
Q. what should I be feeling about my situation? I had sex with a married man. I am barely 18 he is 42 and works in the same place i do. I have a boyfriend. he at first wanted to talk to me all the time after the sex he kept asking how the sex was afte...
A. 2 July 2012: I do agree with your friends. Having a BF and then going out and having sex with your married boss shows a lack of morals and conscience. Obviously your libido and whatever you want is more important then both of those things.
If you think ha... (read in full...)
How much is too much physical interaction for a 6 year old to see between adults?
Q. I am engaged to a 36 year old man with a 6 year old son from his 1st marriage. She died from drugs when their son was 2. He and I plan to have a child(ren) together too. I am in a real good spot. All I want out of life right now is to love t...
A. 2 July 2012:
As for what you describe it sounds rather harmless. I actually think (within reason) that it is a good thing for kids to see that their parents have a healthy relationship. (not that they need to have sex in front of the kid or anything) but hugs... (read in full...)
After 2 years of dating my b/f decides to move closer to his kids/ex wife. I'm devastated
Q. I was single and not dating for 3 years after the breakup of a 6 year relationship and I had this weird sense that I would never be with anyone again. So I tried to put myself out there a bit more with activities and so on and I didn't even meet ...
A. 1 July 2012: I don't think you "wasted" two years on this guy. The fact that you put yourself out there and tried to date someone you didn't think would work says a lot about you. (good things that is ).
Does he want to end your relationship because he is mo... (read in full...)
7 year relationship finished and trust issues?!
Q. Well I have a crush on a friend with whom I have been in constant contact through mail and chat for the last year and a half. (We knew each other 5 years ago through high school.) We know each other real well and I know that there is chemistry ...
A. 1 July 2012: I would stick to being friends. As far as the time line, who knows? Since he dumped her, he might have mentally checked out a LONG time ago, doesn't mean she did.
Took me almost 2 years to get over a 4 1/2 year relationship. And that was even one... (read in full...)
Has my boyfriend crossed a line?
Q. My boyfriend of almost a year is in Miami on a business trip and is coming home today. He has been in contact via text for the 3 days he's been gone, and since this is our first time really apart, I gave him some space and didn't overwhelm him...I ...
A. 1 July 2012: I think when he gets back you two talk like a couple of grown ups.
I think his "lame" attempt of humor would have been better suited for a text to a "bro" then to his GF. I personally think he MUST have been joking, but unlike you I don't kn... (read in full...)
He can't understand I am grieving and sex is the last thing on my mind!
Q. The past six months my Grandfather has been fighting a deadly diease. I was there with him. First 4 months he was at home, so I took the role of nursing him completely. Past 2 months he has been in hospice, and it has been the HARDEST journey for ...
A. 1 July 2012: Talk to him. He might be trying to make you feel better by offering intimacy (sex).
... (read in full...)
He left his wife for me but misses his children
Q. I fell in love with a married man. We are right for each other. He left his wife and children and moved in with me, but told his wife it was a trial separationn and she has no clue what he has been doing. Now a few months in, he has become depre...
A. 1 July 2012: That would be his choice to make. I'm pretty SURE the wife has a clue of what he has been doing, if not.. I truly feel EXTRA sorry for her to be in this position.
As for you, I hope you walk away from this learning something. Maybe even growing ... (read in full...)
I don't want to date a man with kids. Am I expecting too much?
Q. So I have a son who is 16 months old. And for some reason I don't think dating a man with a kid is an option. I find that men with kids tend to have a lot of baggage; child support, baby mom drama, and no money.. I simply don't want a guy who is ...
A. 1 July 2012: Honey, If you live in a glasshouse, it's kinda dumb to throw rocks....
You might have a lot more luck if you take those "list of demands" and light them on fire and look for a man who is WORTHY of sharing your life.
... (read in full...)
How to get past an affair?
Q. If anyone has advice on how to get past an affair, please let me know. It has been 8 years since my wife cheated, and it still feels extremely painful. I can't seem to fully trust her no matter how hard I try....
A. 1 July 2012: Has she ever been to counseling for whatever traumatic event caused her to have PTSD? If not, maybe it's time.
Since you want to stay I say time to roll your sleeves up, and GET help to fix it. It may not be possible, but nothing else has work... (read in full...)
How to get past an affair?
Q. If anyone has advice on how to get past an affair, please let me know. It has been 8 years since my wife cheated, and it still feels extremely painful. I can't seem to fully trust her no matter how hard I try....
A. 30 June 2012:
How did you two deal with this issue back then? Did you two get counseling? Did you talk about? Did you talk about trust?
Trust takes NO time in being torn down and it takes a LONG time to rebuild.
I would suggest you take some time and f... (read in full...)
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