Forthcoming date with my ex ... how to show him what he's been missing?
Q. Hey all!!! Some much needed help please! My bf of 2 years and I broke up just over a month ago.. but we have both continued to see each other every so often. Today we decided to start dating again and just see how it goes. I'm really happy ab...
A. 13 February 2013: I would NOT wear a coat and heals and something "nice" for him. Showing up like that reeks of desperation.
I would dress nice, but not overkill.
Now IF you two keep it together and date for a while, THEN showing up wearing coat & heals (and not... (read in full...)
Mooching Friends.. getting tired of it
Q. I need a bit of advice. I have these two friends (who are very close, roommates with eachother, etc). I enjoy spending time with them as they are very fun, artsy, funny but I feel like they really take advantage of people.. especially me. They don't ...
A. 13 February 2013: I'm with the other aunties..
JUST say no.
They are not MAKING you pay - they are making you FEEL like you have to pay. So by PAYING you tell them that the stunt they are pulling is OK with you and that you really don't MIND paying...
For... (read in full...)
Is he going to ask me to marry him? how would I know ahead of time if he is intending marriage?
Q. Is he going to pop the question....soon? Well here it is again he refers to my mom as MIL His mom gave me pictures of when he was little; he's asked me if he can be my daughters step dad? He's always talks of our future selling his current home...
A. 12 February 2013: How long have you been together? Do YOU want to marry him?
Those are the important questions...... (read in full...)
My boyfriend married someone else a few weeks ago. Should I listen to his words that we could be together?
Q. my boyfriend got married to some other person few weeks back. He says they are not staying together, and he still tells me that he loves me and want to be with me forever and will marry me. i am not getting what to do I am not able to go away ...
A. 12 February 2013: Why are you not able to get away from this man?
HE IS MARRYING someone else.. so what does that make you? Sloppy seconds.
Don't be some guy's sloppy seconds.
WANT more for yourself!!... (read in full...)
Will alcohol make you sick the first time you drink it even if it is just a small amount?
Q. My new boyfriend wants to bring over some champagne or wine for our romantic Valentine's dinner at my house. The problem is I have never drank alcohol in my life, just was never interested or associated with people who drink. Of course I would l...
A. 12 February 2013: I agree with the Cider or... add some Spite/7Up to it because Champagne can be a tad "sour" (dry) and therefore is an acquired taste.
If you do drink it stick to 1/2 glass - 1 glass.... (read in full...)
My friend went out with him and said he was horrible. But then she asked if I'd like his number. Should I be insulted?
Q. My friend was hooked up with this guy and went on a date with him and it was horrible according to her. I sat and listened for hours as she told me everything horrible about it. At the end of this she asked if i would like to have his number b...
A. 12 February 2013: I would ask her (IF she brings it up again) why you would want his number if he is clearly that horrible.
I'm hoping she was joking. If not that is kind of cold of her to try and set you up with someone SHE deems a loser.... (read in full...)
I wouldn't send my love interest an intimate photo so he broke up. Should we stay friends, as he is suggesting?
Q. I met a man on facebook about 5 months ago. We have never met in real life. But we are very close to each other. We have shared everything about our past--his ex's and my ex. I told him about my ex, who blackmails me with pics that he had taken of ...
A. 12 February 2013: Way to go in saying NO!
You obviously learned your lesson from your past experience with your EX, that doesn't give the new guy the RIGHT to call you coy or make demands..
DROP HIM like it's hot! He is not a friend nor do I think he ever wi... (read in full...)
The personality is there. What are the positives and negatives of not having a big physical attraction to the person?
Q. Please consider if someone has the personality, but their looks aren't all the way to what you'd like and you're considering them for a serious relationship, possibly marriage. What are the positives and negatives of not having a big physical attr...
A. 12 February 2013: I would have to ask what it IS specifically that you aren't happy with their look about.
For me, there HAS to be physical attraction, but I have never expected perfection. I'd rather date/marry a GOOD man then a guy who just "looks" good. With tha... (read in full...)
Will my wife get mad if I put up some erotica pictures in my office?
Q. I'm a big fan of vintage erotica and while my wife appreciates the beauty of photographs, I don't know if she is as big a fan as I am. Anyway, I just purchased a bunch of old photographs from Penthouse magazine creator Bob Guccione's colle...
A. 12 February 2013: Why not just ask her?... (read in full...)
How can one tell the children about divorce when your spouse is too emotional to be rational?
Q. For many years now I have been unhappy in my marriage. My wife and I have been together for twenty years. After our children were born my wife became very emotional, and she tends to react to situations by shouting, swearing and crying. She's bee...
A. 12 February 2013: If you belong to a church I would suggest asking for help in guiding the kids through this or find a counselor who can help the kids make sense of it. Kids are smart, don't ever forget that.
And sounds to me like she is trying to emotiona... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is thinking about getting back with his ex. He doesn't know that I know!
Q. Found out my boyfriend of 4 years is thinking about getting back together with his ex-wife. He does not know that I know this...what to do?...
A. 7 February 2013: I would bring it up, he needs to decide and not leave you hanging USING you as a safety blanket while he sits on the fence deciding if the grass is greener with you or her, not fair on you.. OR the ex GF.
... (read in full...)
My parents aren't giving me the freedom I deserve
Q. Hi I'm 21 yrs old and I'm having some trouble issues with my family,especially my father.I'm the tybe of guy who doesn't have many friend maybe 2 or 3 friends(guys)and I think my parents cause this to me.I barely go out and have fun with friends ...
A. 7 February 2013: At 21 are you still in school or working?
Do you contribute to the household? Or are they still paying everything for you? If it's the latter then I don't think they are controlling you per say, I think they are just hoping you would respect ... (read in full...)
I'm really disappointed in myself. How can I motivate myself?
Q. So lately i have been feeling like a nobody. I dont have a job, i dropped out of school back in 2008, havent been able to get my g.e.d and have been a house wife ever since my son was born in 2009. Ive had two jobs between 2009 thru now but didnt ...
A. 7 February 2013: First off, kudos to you for not pawning of your son on your parents. However, asking for help doesn't mean you are a bad mom.
If I were you, I would stop beating yourself up and make a list of things you want to achieve.
I would put GED on... (read in full...)
She never returns the 'favour' for me and disrespects my feelings! Am I overeacting or not?
Q. My lesbian partner and I have an on going issue with sex in our relationship. I always make her have an orgasm but she has never once done this for me. She swings between doing things I ask her not to do to me in the bedroom, to just lying there, ...
A. 7 February 2013: I think she is lazy and selfish when it comes to sex. It has nothing to do with her libido, but the fact that she doesn't seem to give 3 fucks about YOURS or your pleasure.
Sex should be tit for tat, BUT it should never be one-sided either. ... (read in full...)
Struggling with the maintenance payments to my ex and worried about losing my girlfriend over this!
Q. Hi has anyone been in my situation? Any advice? I have been divorced 6 years and pay maintenance to ex and for 1 child, but in past 3 years changes at work meant no raise and no bonuses for that time-I've looked for another job but nothing yet. I ...
A. 7 February 2013: 1. you mom and GF should NEVER foot the bill for what you owe in child maintenance that is just ridiculous! That is 100% YOUR responsibility.
So I would contact the Child Support Agency and if you are unemployed they can lower it til you DO find ... (read in full...)
I'm 26 and want to know if this is a norm, for guys my age? I need to visit a prostitute every week or I get too frustrated.
Q. I feel compelled to sleep with a sex-worker at least once a week. Otherwise, my libido gets the better of me and I find it hard to focus on any task for long because of an over-active sex drive. If I go without sex for three months, I actually...
A. 7 February 2013: I agree with Eddie here, you need help and I suggest the sooner the better.
I would actually look for a good therapist.... (read in full...)
After five months he broke up with me, for doing all the things I thought made me a perfect girl friend. What did I do wrong?
Q. Basically ever since I was younger I've always had this preconception of guys as hard and unfeeling and only wanting sex. So when I picked a boyfriend, I picked one who wouldn't be emotional or sensitive or want me to open myself up, nor one that...
A. 7 February 2013: Honey you got it all backwards....
You wrote (and I quote)
I acted just like I thought a typical man would want.
Don't ACT around people you care for. BE you. Let people get to know and love YOU for YOU, not some "created persona" that you TH... (read in full...)
He's not my Bf. So did he go too far by hugging me from behind? I feel confused by it.
Q. Guy friend hugged me from behind?? We're friends but not close have similar interests and occasionally flirt. Both in serious relationships and have no intention of leaving our partners so no affairs. It was really weird we were talking about my...
A. 7 February 2013: I wouldn't read more into it then a hug. I don't think a hug from behind is any more intimate then a "frontal" one to be frank.
I would guess he thought it was a nice gesture, so take it for that. A friendly HUG.... (read in full...)
Suspicious of my friend's request
Q. Dear cupid i know this sounds stupid but a good friend asked me to return some items to a store for store credit because she lost the receipt . I am starting to think she stole them . Would you take them back can i get into trouble?...
A. 5 February 2013: I would tell her that she needs to return them herself. I would NOT get involved in this. Good friend or not.... (read in full...)
He keeps reminding me that I gave my virginity to someone else who later ended up dumping me. What can I do to improve our relationship?
Q. i have been in a relationship since 5 years.in between a guy came in who seemed more promising n committed proposed me.he seemed very serious.and i lost virginity to him.i was deeply infatuated with this 2nd guy and later i was dumped.the first guy ...
A. 5 February 2013: How would you being a virgin in REALITY mean that you are more his then because you had one lover before him?
He is punishing you for something you CAN NOT change, over and over. To be frank, I would tell him if he can't handle you NOT being a ... (read in full...)
Was it out of line for my therapist to tell me that I'm beautiful?
Q. Dear Cupid, I recently started seeing a therapist because I have issues with my parents at home. I've been verbally abused my whole life and that is why I've decided to seek out a therapist. Last night I had my fist session with my therapist and...
A. 5 February 2013: I think after all the years of you being put down you don't really know how to deal with the "truth" as a non abusive person (your therapist) sees it. (and most like most other people who saw/met you sees you).
No, it wasn't inapprop... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wont get engaged to me unless I get her a 20 000 euro engagement ring
Q. Hi, I ve posted on this website before and I ve found the answere really helpful so I am hoping for some more advice please. I ve been agonizing over this for some time, would be really interested to hear what others think.. My girlfriend w...
A. 5 February 2013: I would have married my husband (and gotten engaged) with a ring from a gumball machine. But then again I'm NOT materialistic, nor do I have anything to prove by wearing expensive jewelry or fancy clothes.
If the 5,000 Euro ring isn't good eno... (read in full...)
Was it appropriate for my Gf to start giving my (male) visitor a body massage while I was absent from the room?
Q. I was getting my phone the other night and it turned out to be a long call from my daughter. when I came back to the living room my girlfriend had my friend's shirt off and was giving him a thorough massage. my friend had told me earlier he gets...
A. 5 February 2013: That was pretty inappropriate of BOTH of them. Basically he had ALREADY told you that he got OFF on massages and then he ASKED her for one? Not cool at all. That is almost on par as asking her for a handjob (almost)
And her... how well does she... (read in full...)
Is it or is it not disrespectful to a wife when a man chats it up with some strange woman and ignores you completely.
Q. I do not know how to add my age to my account but I am 43 years old and my husband is 49. My husband was single for many years after his divorce. I was single for a 2 years before we met, then we were together 4 years before getting married. Yet ...
A. 5 February 2013: Yes, I would find it rude, however.. I'm the kind of person who will introduce myself or walk away from their chit-chat. If I am curious about the other person, I would say hi, I'm XXX, nice to met you. That way SHE has an opportunity to introduce ... (read in full...)
He's a real person. Met him on the Facebook. So why am I feeling So very nervous about meeting him?
Q. I met this guy on Facebook, from what I can tell by his pictures he's a really good looking guy. We've been talking for quite a while now and we are finally going to meet each other for the first time on Friday, we're going to see the new movie ...
A. 5 February 2013: I agree you are nervous because you are excited to meet him. He might be nervous too so don't beat yourself up.
It's a fun movie, which is a good pick for a first date.
Enjoy it.... (read in full...)
Other than a credit card? How to purchase sex toys without the small town bank staff knowing what I purchased?
Q. Hi! Very childish question here, but Im worried. Its a very miniscule problem but I am looking to purchase some "bedroom toys" but Im worried that if I use my debit card the bank will see my purchase! I live in an extremely small town Im taking ...
A. 5 February 2013: You can get a prepaid debit card and use that, no statements to any banks. I know Visa and American Express sell those. I think they come in $25, $50 and more.
Not all places take Paypal, but that could be an option too.... (read in full...)
Was he just being polite? Or is a second date possible? He didn't seem settled during the date
Q. Went out to a bar with this new guy, I was late so I insisted on paying for the drinks. He didn't seems "settled" during the date as he's always playing with coaster, wine glass, smoothing out his hair etc. we were out for about 3hours and HE deci...
A. 5 February 2013: I think he is a little shy perhaps and was not sure if YOU were interested, I would wait and see when he gets back from his trip and perhaps then suggest meeting up.
I think if he really wasn't interested he wouldn't have texted you at all.... (read in full...)
He's awesome. But would never date a HIV positive woman. Should I break up with him, or tell him I'm HIV positive?
Q. I am Hiv positive and have been positive for 10 years now I recently met this nice and awesome guy whom iv dated for 2 months now he always says he’s afraid of Hiv and he would never date a positive woman(he has never tested in his life) I don’t ...
A. 5 February 2013: If you really like the guy I would tell him, I mean what are you going to do when he wants to have sex with you? Use protection and hope for the best?
The thing is though, if you tell him, he might leave, there is always that possibility, but if y... (read in full...)
Why does my brother think I owe him something when he is living with me for free?
Q. Hello Cupid , I have a question for you my mom fell really sick like seven months or so ago my brother moved back from X to come back and help me with my mom. But when he get in good his help begin to slow down.My mom is late for doctors ...
A. 4 February 2013: I think you are doing the right thing. I'd kick him out too. I would look into "recruiting" other people to help with driving your mom.
... (read in full...)
I'm 16. Is it wrong for me to have unprotected sex, already had a miscarriage and want to get pregnant?
Q. ok so heres the deal...me and my bf have been dating for almost a year now...we stated having sex 5 months after we began dating...but we NEVER used condom...we are 2 highschool students and he is to graduate this year...i have suffered a miscarrage ...
A. 4 February 2013: I don't think it's WRONG per say, but I DO think it's STUPID to try and get pregnant at 16.
I have two nieces who got knocked up and never finished high-school - one married the father - he beat her senseless and they divorced. The other is a str... (read in full...)
After10 years of sleeping with a married man who swore he never touched his wife I get a HPV. Was he lying to me? What do I do?
Q. Help. This might sound wrong and sinful of me but I don't know what to do or how to deal. I been having my routine pap smears, blood tests for STDs, and always a HPV test done since the birth of my son, 12 years. All tests have been negative HPV and ...
A. 4 February 2013: You could have gotten HVP from anyone you have ever had sexual contact with. HPV can be dormant for ages, even a decade. So exactly WHERE you got it from is almost impossible to figure out (unless you have only had ONE sexual partner).
As for your... (read in full...)
I want my boyfriend to be more of a man. How do I do this?
Q. Well, me and my bf had been together for 4 years and he's so good to me. We are 23.Problem is, sometimes I feel down when seeing him talking and acting like a girl. When he's talking, he often uses the voice like how a girl laugh. Oh I don't know ...
A. 4 February 2013: You don't.
He is who he is and you shouldn't date him in hopes that you can make him into the "perfect man".
What you are hoping to do is ridiculous. It's like a guy dating a girl telling her she needs to dye her hair red and get triple E imp... (read in full...)
I got drunk and missed my personal tranining session, how do I apologise to my trainer?
Q. What have I done? I've really hurt him:( how do I apologise? So I got drunk last night and I'm the kinda girl that never drinks. (I'm a good girl, i dont party or anything) But I was bored so I drank last night and woke up with the biggest...
A. 4 February 2013: I agree 100% with Cerberus, you are reading WAY to much into this.
Find another trainer if you have such strong feelings for this one. ... (read in full...)
What should I do if my boyfriend asks for sex?
Q. Dear cupid, am 16 and a virgin i love my b/f very much but what should i do if he ask for sex?...
A. 4 February 2013: No?
There is nothing wrong in NOT being ready or willing to have sex at 16. If he can't respect that, maybe he is NOT the guy for you. Don't let anyone pressure you into having sex if you aren't ready.... (read in full...)
I found out the guy I'm dating was posting for no strings sex on Craig's List! What should I do?
Q. I started dating this guy who's really sweet and nice but I found out that before we met he was posting looking for no strings sex in the casual sex ads on Craigslist which I'm a little freaked out about. (he didn't tell me, I kind of stumbled on it ...
A. 4 February 2013: Honestly, either someone is taking the Mickey out of him or this is not something new to him.
I would NOT date a guy who is looking for NSA sex ANYWHERE. I'd end it, the sooner the better (for your sake). Do you think that he will STOP posting ... (read in full...)
B/f takes 20 minutes to respond to texts and comes back with cliche responses. Is something up?
Q. Big dilemma you guys ill try and keep it short. I really need some help. My boyfriend is 22 and works on a boat for 2 weeks of the month. Well, all day he texts me like once every couple of hours, and on his lunch break, like once. When he gets off ...
A. 4 February 2013: Next time you are FACE-to-FACE with him TALK to him, don't try and resolve these issues over the phone and specially NOT through texts.
If he withholds to somehow "punish" you for talking to a male friend then he is being childish - he should i... (read in full...)
B/f takes 20 minutes to respond to texts and comes back with cliche responses. Is something up?
Q. Big dilemma you guys ill try and keep it short. I really need some help. My boyfriend is 22 and works on a boat for 2 weeks of the month. Well, all day he texts me like once every couple of hours, and on his lunch break, like once. When he gets off ...
A. 3 February 2013: Dude, if he is WORKING he shouldn't be texting you... That shouldn't be his priority.
I would give him a little space when he is working. ... (read in full...)
I got drunk once and now my relatives think I get drunk all the time
Q. Hey everyone, I'm 24 years old. As silly as this sounds my relatives(not immediate family) won't let me forget something I did! So my friends and I were partying at a club and they handed me one shot of tequila, here's the thing I have never consu...
A. 3 February 2013: Eh don't sweat it. If getting drunk is not your "normal" state let them wag their tongues, because in the end... they will look stupid, people who knows you, know you aren't a drunk.. Screw those people.. even if you are related to em!
... (read in full...)
Met a gorgeous guy on the train but he has a girlfriend!
Q. Hello Everyone This Week I met a guy. The way I met him and started talking seems like it belongs in a movie. Basically I was waiting in the train station waiting for my train number to be announced. When they finally called it I headed down the ...
A. 3 February 2013: If he has a GF I would back far far away. He isn't going to dump her for you. Not anytime soon. He might tell you he is just to get you in bed.
And IF he does.. how long do you think it will take for him to hook up with someone else and dump you... (read in full...)
I want love. But my mother is nagging me to get married asap. Is what I want too much to ask for?
Q. I'm 26 and single. My mom has been constantly telling me to just find someone and get married. As long as he's nice and I can tolerate him then that's good enough. Anyone would do. Anyone is better than no one. I'm 26, it's time, soon it'll be to...
A. 3 February 2013: You are ONLY 26 - do not listen to your mom, this isn't the 1800 or 1930's where a woman couldn't take care of herself if need be.
I met my now hubby at 27 we didn't marry til 18 months later, if he wasn't someone I loved with all my heart an... (read in full...)
Are relationships that exist with absolutely NO violence towards one another?
Q. Aunts and Uncles... Have any of you (honest answers please) had a physical fight with your current spouse? I just want to know if there are relationships that exist with absolutely NO violence towards one another. Again, please be honest. Th...
A. 3 February 2013: I have never been in a relationship where hitting each other was OK. Horsing around for FUN (tickle/wrestle) but hitting in anger? BIG NO NO!
And yes it can be done, been married 15 year and neither of us have ever laid a finger on each other...... (read in full...)
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