Are relationships that exist with absolutely NO violence towards one another?
Q. Aunts and Uncles... Have any of you (honest answers please) had a physical fight with your current spouse? I just want to know if there are relationships that exist with absolutely NO violence towards one another. Again, please be honest. Th...
A. 3 February 2013: I have never been in a relationship where hitting each other was OK. Horsing around for FUN (tickle/wrestle) but hitting in anger? BIG NO NO!
And yes it can be done, been married 15 year and neither of us have ever laid a finger on each other...... (read in full...)
My supposed friends are spreading rumors about me and a teacher. How do I stop this?
Q. Im not the type of person to get bullied, i rarely ever do, i can't handle rumors properely, especially if their big ones. These two girls that are supposed to be my 'friends' spread a rumor saying that i like a teacher, and that i've been doing ...
A. 3 February 2013: I agree with Caring guy, talk to your school counselor and your parents, this needs to be nipped in the bud and these GIRLS need to know that it is NOT OK to start these kind of rumors. HE can lose his job and you your reputation, all for a few ... (read in full...)
I think that this guy's comments about paying me to have sex with him were completely uncalled for!
Q. Hello I am happily married and middle aged and work with a group of girls in health care, There is one guy who also works with us, he is a flirty joking type. One of the girls at work likes him and hits on him a lot. Yesterday evening he m...
A. 3 February 2013: Eh he is a loser. Next time someone tells you something creepy he said just say eww, I wouldn't touch that guy if he was the last man on Earth and then ignore it.... (read in full...)
Male co-worker a little too interested in my life. Its weird, isn't it?
Q. There's a guy at work who I've known for a couple of months. He came out of a relationship in December and we were texting and he wanted to be f***buddies but I didn't want that as I wanted a relationship but I knew he had to get over her so I was ...
A. 3 February 2013: Seems like he is still hoping you will take him up on the F-buddy offer.
He can ASK all the questions he likes, you can always tell him, Dude it's none of your business.
... (read in full...)
Cheating:( How do guys keep their girlfriend from cheating?
Q. How do you keep your girl from cheating? Please i am asking for a range of different answers, so please give me your opinion on whats the best way to keep a partner faithful, or atleast, what actions can a guy do, to keep her girl from seeking ...
A. 30 January 2013: You can't "make" other people do or not do something. You can however DATE women who have the same attitude towards cheating as you do and who believes in having a monogamous relationship and well, having some morals.... (read in full...)
My husband bought a necklace for a random waitress. I find it inappropriate, he thinks it's charity. Thoughts please.
Q. Mod note: I added she was the waitress to make the question more clear. I found a receipt for a swarovski necklace in the sale in my husbands week day apartment. When I asked him about it, after a few laughs, he said that he goes to a chinese ...
A. 30 January 2013: I think it's very inappropriate for a married guy to give any one but their wife, mother/MIL or family member jeweler.
And honestly, I think there is more to it then "random" kindness. Specially since MANY women sees jeweler y as part of the wooi... (read in full...)
My wife's continous chatting with x husband is killing me
Q. My wife of one year ( my second and her third marriage ) continues to communcicate with her x husband whom she left. He has not moved on and still loves her and seems to me to be controlling with narisistic behavior via email,skype etc. She responds ...
A. 27 January 2013: I wouldn't give her an ultimatum right out off the bat. I would sit her down and tell her how it makes you feel and I would also ASK her how SHE would feel if you kept staying in touch with ex's.
This is a PERFECT opportunity for the two of you t... (read in full...)
Was my boyfriend's gesture and behaviour strange in this situation?
Q. Recently my boyfriend (who makes an excellent living) brought me a bouquet of flowers. They were the grocery store variety and the price tag that he left on the cellophane said $7. He came to my front door with said flowers still in the plastic ...
A. 27 January 2013: It would have been a nice gesture if he hadn't HAD to put in the snide remark about their price.
I have never thought flowers from a grocery store is bad. Flowers are flowers. Now if this was your 10th anniversary or something I can see he "ough... (read in full...)
He didn't tell me I was his stop gap live in lover!
Q. We lived together for about 7 months. He had an old friend. He slept with her once, if he's not lying, and she got pregnant. Then she left to her country which is Russia. He's divorced 33 year old guy and he always wanted a baby but didnt grt one in ...
A. 27 January 2013: Yes you were a stop gap as you call it, someone to keep his bed warm til his Russian GF can get back or he found someone "better" suited for him.
Dump the "old" fart and find yourself someone closer to your own age.
And quit with the hitting... (read in full...)
When to proceed and when to abandon.. (dating)?
Q. Sometimes you go on a date...and there is an initial exchange of messages after, saying 'blah blah, that was fun' ...then a second date isn't scheduled. I'm thinking there are either two reasons a) both parties aren't bothered b) both parties are...
A. 27 January 2013: I think if there is all this ambivalence about the first date, why bother. If you LIKED the girl you call and ask her out again, if she shoot you down.. on to the next.
Unfortunately MANY girls (in your age group) think it's the guy's "job" to... (read in full...)
Does anyone else have to pay board to their parents?
Q. Hi, just a quick question! I am 20 years old, and have just moved back home. My parents have asked me to contribute $100 a week, for rent/bills/food. I work full-time, making about $600 (aus) a week. I also have my phone bill to pay, as well as ...
A. 27 January 2013: I moved out when I was 18 and spend a year abroad, when I got home I paid rent/food while I was working, when I started back in college I didn't. Then a year after I got home I met my first BF and we moved in together 4 1/2 years later we broke up ... (read in full...)
I have trust issues with my BF after he sexted his ex on Facebook
Q. Hello all! i have a question about my partner. It's been a rocky road for us but he moved in in november 2012. A week after i discovered messages to his ex lovers, not one but a few, which angered and hurt me immensely. He reminisced about their se...
A. 27 January 2013: I don't want to sound harsh, but I 'd go with stupid. WHY keep getting mad if you keep "forgiving" it?
Basically you are telling him it's OK to keep doing what he is doing as long as he apologize..
If I were you would just end it, he is NO... (read in full...)
BF reacted badly when I mentioned my physical insecurities about sex - should he be so upset, and how can I fix this?
Q. Ok, I need some insight. Without being too graphic, my boyfriend of over a year and a half and I had finished having sex and were lying in bed. Somewhere along the lines of us just talking he said that he really like when I’m on top and in reverse, ...
A. 26 January 2013: I think he was upset because he sees you are gorgeous, and you don't.
He isn't with one of those "perfectly toned girls" he is with YOU, because he CARES about YOU.
Yes, I can see why he could be a little upset. Could be he feels like you a... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants to know if he can go to a party where his ex will be. What do I say?
Q. My bf met up with his ex behind my back 2 years ago. He lied about it but the truth eventually came out. Not only that he'd saved semi naked (recent) photos on his computer from her facebook. We had a massive argument and had a break but I ...
A. 25 January 2013: I would go as well. He really shouldn't have a problem with that now should he?... (read in full...)
Why does my husband watch one particular part of my body during sex?
Q. Hi, I am really embarrassed but here it goes: sex with my husband is over the top. I mean, since I've been with him I finally understood what "to make love" means: he's caring and sentimental in the bedroom and outside the bedroom too. When he is ...
A. 24 January 2013: I think it's pretty normal to be honest. He isn't being shallow I think he is just committing it to memory over and over because it gives him pleasure.
... (read in full...)
I experimented with my male friend, but decided to go back to females. Why is he so upset?
Q. I’m a young man and I’ve trouble with a friend. I’m very outgoing person, I like to try new things and everything new. My friend is gay and although I’m straight, I thought that I’m living only once and decided I want to try something with another ...
A. 24 January 2013: Well, how would you feel if a girl wanted to "have fun" with you and then left you for a woman?
Experimenting with finding your sexuality is not a bad thing, but HOW you go about it an be.
My guess is, this guy developed feelings for you... (read in full...)
Is a man wearing a women's swimsuit really a 'sexual offense' especially as the man did it drunk at a party?
Q. I have recently found out my 24-year-old daughter is dating a convicted sex offender, she had inadvertently mentioned it when talking about her new boyfriend (he's 32). I feel sick and disgusted but at the sametime am powerless to stop her. She...
A. 24 January 2013: I do know that in some states (in the US) you can be convicted as a low-level sex offender by getting caught peeing outside/exposing yourself, but I have NEVER heard that wearing a woman's swimsuit can be classified and land a guy on sexual ... (read in full...)
Why is this guy telling people that we had a relationship?
Q. About five years ago I had a casual fling with a guy I met at a work do. By 'casual fling' I mean we met up, went on a few dates, had dinner together, etc. over a period of about three months. We were both working away a lot, so we must have seen ...
A. 24 January 2013: Ignore it, the dude is obviously delusional.
However if it goes any further I would tell him he needs to quit it, it was a 3 months fling and that is it, you are not in any way shape or form interested in more.
Personally I don't really see... (read in full...)
Why does he only phone me from work? Why doesn't he answer when I call him? Could he be playing me?
Q. Okay PLEASE HELP. So I am 19. Keep in mind I have always had a very old soul and countless people have told me this. I am not your average teenager I should probably be older I act like it... Anyways. I have always liked older guys. Recently, ...
A. 13 January 2013: He NEVER answer your calls or texts?
BIG HUMONGOUS red flag. Even if he isn't dating someone else, or isn't married, he is still 100% in control of the communication - does THAT sound healthy? At all? And then he ignores you for days?
For you... (read in full...)
I feel uncomfortable about our little argument.Was I wrong, or was he, or were we both wrong in some way?
Q. I need help, I might as well explain the whole story... Okay on Friday night me and my bf were texting quite late and he didn’t reply for a while so I said 'g2g night love you xxxx' and he still didn’t reply so I guessed he fell asleep which is ...
A. 13 January 2013: I'm with iAmHereToHelpYou
OVERREACTING on both parts.
STOP carrying on a "relationship" over texts. It's NO proper way to convey your feeling, no matter how many XX's and smiley faces you stack in there, EVERYTHING can easily be misunderstood... (read in full...)
Met a great guy but he's 20 years older and a "happy single". What should I do?
Q. Hi. I met this man online. I knew he was older than me (51yrs old, I'm 31) but and we became friends, we met up yesterday the first time and we went for a meal and I had a great time, and something else happened I realised I liked him more than ...
A. 13 January 2013: Hmm, if he is a HAPPY single at 51 I just don't see him changing any time soon.
However, if you do spend time with him (NO SEX -ABSOLUTELY no sex) and get to know him and he gets to know you, who knows maybe he will want more then friendsh... (read in full...)
Do I still have a chance at getting this girl?
Q. There is this girl I've had my eye on at school lately. I don't know her on a personal level at all because we've never spoken to each other. However I have another female friend that does know her. I had my friend ask the girl what she thought ...
A. 13 January 2013: My advice, don't do that in the future, it's like shooting yourself in the foot before a marathon.
Maybe you though she would SWOON over your awesome picture, but the thing is it might even BE that she liked the picture and just didn't want ... (read in full...)
He abused me for years. Then he found a new Gf. Now he is ill he wants me back. What do I say? I said "no" but he's not listening.
Q. I was in love with this guy in my early teens and he was 16 at the time. We were together for many years had two kids and then he winds up being over protective very mentally, verbally,physically abusive toward me. The abuse started after I had ...
A. 13 January 2013: 1. STOP talking to him it is NOT helping in any way shape or form to move on if you keep contact with him.
2. Block him, delete him whatever you need to do. If you really feel a need to let him know WHY, then say I do not want anything from you... (read in full...)
Almost 30. Is it ridiculous that I'm still waiting for 'Mr Right?'
Q. I'm 29, single for almost three years, I meet nice men through internet or when I go out, but I keep turning them down. It's not that I'm looking for someone "better" or think I deserve the richest or smartest. It's just that I want to meet someone...
A. 13 January 2013: I believe in being realistic, but NEVER settle.
The thing is though you set out to date guy so you can take them apart, which to me means you haven't figured out what you really want or met a guy you just fell head over heals for.
I do NOT be... (read in full...)
Can or have men been able to stop using Porn once they meet the woman who is the 'ONE'?
Q. Is there any men here who stopped using porn once they found a girlfriend who they thought was the one? Am I just dreaming here or can this happen? I have read about this happening as soon as they started the relationship. ...
A. 13 January 2013: I don't think it matter is she is the ONE or the Nex-tbest thang...
If a guy knows his GF/SO don't like porn and would prefer he didn't watch it, he would either respect it or not. But I don't think a guy without hearing how porn affect his GF w... (read in full...)
I'd like to be exclusive, not FWB. Should I just stop sleeping with him?
Q. This guy and I have many mutual friends. For months we kept running into each other at parties and finally about 7 months later I kissed him out of nowhere. He explained to me how he had been trying to find out more about me for months and try to ...
A. 13 January 2013: If you want more and you think HE wants more, why play games? Why not straight out tell him? Honestly, what do you have to lose?
But YES if you want to DATE him - then stop having sex, go on dates that doesn't involve sex. Spend time with him, get... (read in full...)
Should I tell my husband that I cheated on my ex with a co-worker? Or leave the past in the past?
Q. Been happily married for a few months after I'd been with my ex for a few years. Do you think I should tell my husband I cheated on my ex and had a six-month affair with a co-worker? Now I don't have any contacts with either my ex nor my former a...
A. 12 January 2013: If you REALLY felt like he should know this about you, then WHY didn't you tell him BEFORE you married him?
Don't you think that would have been more "right" in that case?
You did something amoral. You regret it, you learned from it and you ... (read in full...)
She forgot about a pre-arranged date, again. Should we talk? Is she being unreasonable?
Q. Stupid argument? My girlfriend and I arranged to have a date night last night. She forgot about it once already, as the week progressed and she forgot about it once again last night. It's been a rather stressful week for her at work and personal...
A. 12 January 2013: She seems to take you for granted. That you abide by HER busy schedule and suffer WITH her if she is stressed. Now I DO think it's nice to have someone to share with when you are stressed, but she is taking it out on you. Which I don't think is ... (read in full...)
My Bf has gone on a vacation to Hawaii without me! When he returns should I make demands and set out my expectations?
Q. Hi Dear Cupiders, I really wanted to get some unbiased input from you all. I'll really try to make a long story short. There is a lot of history between my bf and I. We were together for 1.5 years, broke up because he cheated and left me for anot...
A. 12 January 2013: Who goes to Hawaii for the week-end alone? Unless he is a surfing enthusiast or he just REALLY needed break, I just don't see it. But then again I don't know your guy. Is this common for him?
And I agree with the anon writer - He didn't want you... (read in full...)
Online comments from girls: should I take notice? Does a guy's personality change girl's opinion or perceptions about a guy?
Q. When I asked girls (online) to rate me, the majority of them said I was okay but I wasn't their type of guy. One girl said I was okay but no panty dropper (kinda hurt my feelings). and a couple said I wasn't good looking. I wanted to hear the trut...
A. 12 January 2013: I have to agree, don't ask a question if you don't think you can handle an "honest" answer.
The thing is NONE of of the people "rating" you knows you. And people online are not always totally nice. Specially your own peers.
Personality, ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my husband that I cheated on my ex with a co-worker? Or leave the past in the past?
Q. Been happily married for a few months after I'd been with my ex for a few years. Do you think I should tell my husband I cheated on my ex and had a six-month affair with a co-worker? Now I don't have any contacts with either my ex nor my former a...
A. 11 January 2013: I don't see why you would need to tell him. If this is something you regret and would NEVER do again, why bring it up?
Now if the SUBJECT of cheating came up and he asked you straight out, I would be honest.... (read in full...)
Can short guys have success with women? And if so how? I need advice on how to cope better with my height.
Q. I am a 5'4" male and i am very insecure about my height. I know that women love tall guys and that most of them turn their noses at the thought of dating a guy as short as me. However, I also know that some guys my height and shorter do have suc...
A. 11 January 2013: I have never looked at a guy and though:" UH too short to date!" "Or too blond!"
Quite a few of my male friends are shorter then me and I'm 5'7 - but one of them married a model she is 6' at least and isn't shy about wearing heals with him arou... (read in full...)
Why did he string me along for 2 years?
Q. I started dated this guy 2 years ago. In the beginning everything was great. Then after couple of months he said we are taking it slow. So I have been patient. Then after 9 month dating I got a letter from him saying that he never broke up with the...
A. 11 January 2013: Seems to me that he is a serial dater. He dates one girl til he finds someone "better" (or just different) and date both girls a while and dump whomever he feels is easier to let go.
He really isn't SUCH a prize.
However, I will say yes, he... (read in full...)
Some queries about my relationship. Should I go on the pill? He'd like oral sex but I'm not comfortable with it?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a year. We have used condoms, and the pull out method , when we have had sex. He wants me to try using the pill. I'm nervous about it though, as I have never used it before (he is the only person I have had sex with ...
A. 11 January 2013: I agree with Sage
1. talk to your doctor. And I DO think you starting SOME kind of BC would be a smart thing to do. Pull out method is like playing Russian Roulette.
2. If you don't LIKE giving him oral, you don't like it. The thing is I DO th... (read in full...)
Is a brazilian wax worth the pain?
Q. So i'm really nervous now, I've booked myself in for a full Brazilian wax in a few days. But my friends have made me really nervous saying the pain is terrible!! I have a bad pain threshold, but I think of it as deal with the pain for something that ...
A. 11 January 2013: Like SVC said:
**take ibuprofen about 90 minutes before the waxing
be well hydrated
be well moisturized and exfoliated in advance. **
It's over in a short time and honestly it's well worth it.
Though if you aren't 100% sure, do the bik... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has female friend that he is entirely too close to
Q. So ill be honest, its a bit messed up, My boyfriend has a friend hes entirely too close to, She calls and texts him constantly, he makes plans to go places we didnt intend on because she gave him the invite. At first she wasnt a problem, then the ...
A. 11 January 2013: Amen to every word SVC typed - read them and then read them again.
... (read in full...)
Does he have a mental disorder?
Q. Hello, this might seem a bit random but i'm just wondering if anyone has experienced anything like this? My boyfriend is like no one i've ever met before, hes 21 near 22 we have been together for near 2 years and ive known him for 10. He has su...
A. 11 January 2013: I agree 100% with Janniepeg.
However, I'm not a doctor.
... (read in full...)
I need help ASAP! This guy is acting so dumb!
Q. I started talking to this guy a month ago, he is the type that acts like a player but he really doesn't get too many girls. We go to college together in California and after we began talking about 4 days later we had sex, I know that was a no no. ...
A. 11 January 2013: He has done this with 3 girls in the past, so you KNOW this is his MO (so to speak) and yet you still think you can "change" him?
I think you are either fooling yourself because you really dig him or you are a little naive when it comes to guys.... (read in full...)
My husband going to massage parlors. Do I leave him?
Q. I have been married to my Husband for five years. We both have two boys and all four of them live with us. About four years ago I found they my husband was on dating website we split up but decided to try and work things out. About two years ago I ...
A. 11 January 2013: Are you really having SEX with him if you suspect he is cheating on you with prostitutes?
I don't understand that at all. IF I thought my husband was cheating SEX would be the LAST thing I'd want from him.. well, second to last.. and STD would be... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if first time sex felt right?
Q. So I had sex for the first time last night and I have some questions, I apologize if this is a little explicit... I didn't feel any pain when he entered me, thankfully- my hymen was already broken through fingering and he knew what he was doin...
A. 11 January 2013: 1. NEVER have unprotected sex if you don't want to become pregnant. It's just to big a risk to take. IT only takes one time.
2. I have to say first times for many women is kinda of a let down. You are left with the "Is that it?" feeling, but with... (read in full...)
Is my body not compatible with the IUD?
Q. I realise this isnt entirely a relationship question but i do genuinly need some help on this one.... i had an IUD fitted about 2/3 months ago and since then my periods have been eratic. I have bleed for 9/10 days the past 2 months, had head...
A. 11 January 2013: I agree, go see your doctor. Obviously this may NOT be the birth control for you.... (read in full...)
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