Co-workers conspiracy theories on zoom chats are driving me crazy
Q. I've had to work from home and do Zoom meetings. However, there's a problem with our Zoom meeting... one employee is constantly behaving pompously and disrupting meetings with conspiracy theories, but he hasn't been fired yet. He's caused ups...
A. 18 February 2021: Part from conspiracy theories, does this coworker ADD anything vital to the ZOOM meetings, if not I'd simply mute him.
If he does WHY doesn't ANYONE shut him down? Say:" Hey Bob we are here to discuss XYZ, you can keep your theories to yourself... (read in full...)
Am I being unreasonable and over protective in following the guidance of the midwives and my own desires.
Q. Hi all, I am pregnant with my first child and due to give birth in the next couple of months. I have decided that due to covid and the guidelines based around it ATM I do not want my newborn to have any visitors or meet anyone from the outside...
A. 17 February 2021: Are you giving birth at home?
Because maybe you should consider changing that to a hospital. The hospital will shoot down that nonsense right away.
While I get that traditions are important - they are. There are times where we need to "adjust"... (read in full...)
How can I let her know she has my permission to see other men and that I find it a real turn on?...
Q. A stranger asked my wife for a date. When she told me about it I was aroused. How can I let her know she has my permission to see other men and that I find it a real turn on?...
A. 17 February 2021: Personally, I would be disgusted if my husband suggested this, even if I had told him about getting hit on. Because that happens EVEN to married women.
What kind of marriage do you want? The kind with no faithfulness, the kind with "kinks" ... (read in full...)
Why does my ex girlfriend still have a profile picture of both of us on Facebook?
Q. Hi. I broke up with my girlfriend a month ago. I have looked at her Facebook account recently and noticed that she still has several profile pictures up of both of us as a couple and friends commenting what a nice couple we are and how happy sh...
A. 17 February 2021: I think it all comes down to how often she delete pictures. Some rarely do it, some "clean house" after a break up or when angry etc.
Does it means she holds out hope because she still has them up? Not necessarily.
And like Kenny said, it a... (read in full...)
My future in laws don't want to follow the guidelines for Covid-19 and I am extremely vulnerable healthwise
Q. Hi, I’m really stressed about my father in law to be. He has been breaking the lockdown rules with his two daughters and their partners the whole way through this third lockdown. However, me and my fiancé have been sticking to the rules, I’ve been...
A. 16 February 2021: I fully agree with Code Warrior,
It's the "live and let live" attitude you need to adapt. If isolating yourselves (you and your partner) WORKS for you two, then do so. You can't control your in-laws.
And you might also consider that your partne... (read in full...)
I get angry and depressed sometimes because I didnt date when I was younger
Q. I didn't really start dating until near the end of my 20s, i'm in my early 30s now, i'm dating someone new, while of course i am happy and glad to have met her, i do have these thoughts. I wonder if it is a common mindset or thought for peop...
A. 16 February 2021: You do know that you are not LESS of a man for not having slept around a lot when younger? Right?
People with fewer sexual partners are more likely to have less if any STD's STI's - so in a sense the fewer partner really IS the better.
I don't... (read in full...)
How can I get my husband to masturbatein front of me
Q. How can I get my husband to masterbate in front of me. Hes gotten more comfortable with the idea and will now do it for a like 30 seconds then he stops and we have sex...but I want him to do it untill he finishes so I can see him climax and his c...
A. 15 February 2021: Stop pushing him.
Just let him know that you would love to watch him do it, since you think HE the hottest thing since sliced bread. But that you are WILLING to wait for him to be ready to do this FOR you.
He isn't your personal porn ac... (read in full...)
I want to break no contact and get in touch with my ex even though I know I shouldnt
Q. I feel like I’m going insane. My ex and I broke up a month ago and he has already, by the looks of it, moved on with someone else. I know you’re supposed to not look at your exes social media pages after a breakup but one day I cracked out of ...
A. 15 February 2021: What was the reason for the break up?
You say you want him back, but OBVIOUSLY, he doesn't want YOU back or he would have moved on with someone else. I know that isn't "nice" to hear but the truth is the truth.
Yes, a month is super fast to mo... (read in full...)
My boyfriend thinks that flirting with and kissing other women isn't cheating
Q. My boyfriend believes that him flirting with and kissing other women is not cheating. I’ve tried talking to him but he gets reactive and angry. I feel it is cheating so I refrain from engaging with other men, but his perspective has me in knots. I’m ...
A. 15 February 2021: So why are you with him?
He obviously doesn't care hoe you feel nor does he respect you.
Let him go, don't accept for him to treat you in a manner you are not comfortable with. You don't HAVE to be dating him, and he IS "just" a BF...
Let h... (read in full...)
A troubled relationship and I don't know what to do anymore
Q. All I do is cry. I feel stuck in a relationship. I've tried to give it my all. I'm settled in my career and he isn't. So he doesnt want to get married yet despite knowing that's on top of my agenda. I told him recently that I'm emotionally ...
A. 15 February 2021: Why are you ignoring what he is saying?
He has told you (I'm guessing multiple times) that he isn't ready for marriage.
You two are not only on different pages, you are in different books.
While him grieving his grandparents might have ... (read in full...)
Is this appropriate conversation between a father and daughter?
Q. do you think its appropriate for dad to tell his adult daughter in her twentys that he use to change her diapers and when he gets older she can change his ...
A. 13 February 2021: Yes, since it was without a doubt done with a sense of humor.
What the dad said was - I took care of you when you were unable to take care of yourself (baby) so you can take care of ME when I'm unable to take of myself (due to age).
Persona... (read in full...)
Is this normal for someone who stopped speaking and just block you on one thing and keep on other stuff ?
Q. Hi everyone. I'm not really asking for help just seeing If anyone else has had this happen I was with this guy for 5 months last year who I found out he has a trust issue and holds a barrier up if he gets too close to someone Anyway cut long s...
A. 13 February 2021: OP,
It's over, OK?
You write :"I'm wanting to block him on these as there is no going back but want to keep on as long as I can to see how long it takes him to take me off them all"
No, just block him, how long it takes him to block you o... (read in full...)
How do I keep my distance from my brother without interfering in our kid's friendship?
Q. My brother and I stopped talking to each other about fifteen years ago. We never got along when we were kids and we have nothing in common. Growing up, when we did try to do things together, we just ended up getting into a fight. So after our last ...
A. 13 February 2021: I agree with YCBS,
Ask your wife to liaise with HIS wife when it comes to the kids.
OR just learn to suck up this "feud" and be civil when it comes to the kids. You don't have to be best buddie because your kids are becoming friends. My kids... (read in full...)
My husband is leaving our family for his male best friend. I'm not sure how to cope
Q. Hello there. My husband told me last night that he's in love with his best friend and the feeling's mutual and he's prepared to move to Italy to be with him. His best friend already has a wife and a daughter; he's moved out during the pandem...
A. 13 February 2021: You can't change how your husband feel.
And he feel like this OTHER man is the one for him, not you. Which I can only imagine, SUCKS!
He won't be a lesser dad for ending the marriage. At least he didn't cheat behind your back. He has been upfr... (read in full...)
I don't know if we should get married when all we do is fight
Q. So I've been with my fiance for 6 years - engaged for 3. The last two years things have been going downhill. Our sex life became abysmal. Lots of arguing. We haven't slept together in three months and we argue all the time. He was putting me down a ...
A. 13 February 2021: It seems like your fiancé has also been a GOOD influence on you, as you are now clean of drugs and "free" of the "friends" you used to do drugs with.
I think you need to make a plan, for what YOU want in your life. And unfortunately #1 seems to... (read in full...)
My husband only wants sex when he is drunk
Q. I'm having a problem with my sex life; embarrassing to ask, but I don't know where to go. My husband doesn't seem to want sex with me unless he's drunk and can't seem to get interested unless he's tanked up on vodka and beer. He's a great gu...
A. 13 February 2021: Is it normal for someone to really only want sex when drunk?
In my experience, no, not "normal".
If it was normal, he would have been doing it from the beginning of your courtship, not just in the last 4 months.
Personally?
I would de... (read in full...)
I cheated on my husband. Do I tell him or just let it pass?
Q. What do I do? Of late while my hubby has been neglecting me, I have been having increasing attention from other men in my social circles. The other day, I drank a bit too much when in a party. There was this younger man who seemed irresistible. We...
A. 12 February 2021: This gotta be a troll.
... (read in full...)
My g/f is Muslim we are hiding it from our families. How do go about bringing us into the open?
Q. I have been dating a girl for a few months. We met online through a dating app. I feel like she is everything that I have been searching for in a partner. I realize that our relationship is still very young and of course there is still time for ...
A. 12 February 2021: If you REALLY want to convert, talk to a Muslim scholar/Imam, not rely on your friends. There are nuances they don't consider because they LIVE with the religion in most aspects of their lives and they have from birth. For them, "that is just how ... (read in full...)
I want to date and yet just don't feel interested
Q. So, I have been single for 7 months now and I have thought it’s about time I put myself back there and I decided to go on Tinder... However, I feel as if I’m going through a weird stage “trying to date again”.. without sounding rude (I’m not a ...
A. 11 February 2021: Don't do things half-asses. That goes for dating too.
Yes, I know casual dating is a "thing" these days, but it's really not worth it in the long run.
Work on you, be it working out, meditation, learning new skills, old skills to re-hone - fin... (read in full...)
I feel like my boyfriend doesn't know how to be in a relationship
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year now. This is his first real relationship and we live together. We are passed the honeymoon phase. He used to text me all the time, now I hear from him 2-3 times during the work day. He is really into ...
A. 11 February 2021: Do you have hobbies or friends or do you rely 100% on him for attention and interactions?
Maybe you need to branch out a little and learn to do your own thing. You two moved in with each other real fast, he still want to do thing HE enjoys (... (read in full...)
I'm unhappy with current job but am confused as to what to do
Q. Im sadly in a job that i hate , like most people may hate their jobs , but im grateful for having a job and think of the positives in that it goes quick , there is always something to do and i never feel bored . I am a domestic worker in a care ...
A. 11 February 2021: Cleaning for young people or old people makes no difference in the ACTUAL job which is cleaning. And it's CLEANING you don't like so really? what would change? Other than scenery?
Stick it out a bit longer while you look for other options,... (read in full...)
Should I get to know him again? I was not attracted to him in the past
Q. Someone who i used to speak to has recently got in contact with me again ,when we used to be friends , he said he was attracted to me i never felt the same way . Shall i get to know him again ? i try to meet people to take my mind of things but in ...
A. 11 February 2021: No.
It wasn't a food fit before, it's not going to be now. JUST because YOU want to get your "mind off" someone else doesn't mean you should USE this guy to rub your ego.
He isn't "an old friend" he is a guy who used to have the hots for you... (read in full...)
Should I keep her in my life as a friend?
Q. Around 7 months ago I began sending texts to a girl I had matched with on Tinder. We hit it off really well, and ended up texting each other multiple times a day and video chatting at least once a week. We made plans to see each other in person once ...
A. 9 February 2021: Wish her well, and cut contact.
This was a fantasy that perhaps could have become reality but never really materialized.
Yes, cute gif and emojis are nice and make us smile but there is no DEPTH to an emoji. Seriously.
People get a "high" f... (read in full...)
How do I deal with paranoia during lockdown?
Q. Hi Cupids, Wanting to see if I could get a bit of advice about how I've been feeling at the min as it's quite isolating. I've been noticing especially through lockdown that whenever i'm anxious I have huge waves of paranoia which I keep in...
A. 9 February 2021: 1. stop drinking AT ALL. If you have such negative behavior when drinking then perhaps NOT drinking is advisable and common sense.
2. If this is out of character for you, GO see your doctor. He/She can refer you to mental health professi... (read in full...)
My ex treats me like a friend with benefits
Q. When you and your guy break up after years of being in a relationship. Why would the ex boyfriend say he wants to be friends, yet when HE wants sex then he’s all over me trying to get some and that’s ok to happen. But other times when he’s over my ...
A. 9 February 2021: People will treat you how you ALLOW them to treat you.
YOU allow him to "USE" you as a no strings FWB when it SUITS him. So he does.
When YOU want more, he shuts you down. And you allow that too.
OP, it didn't work out. CUT him lose. CUT h... (read in full...)
I'm having a difficult time getting over the breakup
Q. I'm going through a really tough breakup and I'm trying to figure out why. My ex of a year wasn't great to me. He frustrated me more often than not, he didn't go out of his way for me, couldn't communicate well and made me feel VERY insecure and ...
A. 9 February 2021: I think one of the reasons you have a hard time moving on is because you STILL talk to him, you still keep him around and he keeps you around. (even if it's just over "tech"/social media/texts).
You went into a relationship thinking you could da... (read in full...)
I feel like I can't breath when boyfriend sleeps with me
Q. This is the first time in my life that I feel like this. When I met this guy everything was great. Sex amazing, he is funny, handsome, etc. Now 3 months Into this. When we sleep together I wake by a feeling that I cant breath. Its rea,ly a ter...
A. 8 February 2021: It sounds like Night Terrors or beginning of an anxiety attack.
My advice? Talk to your doctor first then consider a therapist if your doctor confirms there is nothing medical going on.
It can also be that you simply aren't as ready as you tho... (read in full...)
My g/f is Muslim we are hiding it from our families. How do go about bringing us into the open?
Q. I have been dating a girl for a few months. We met online through a dating app. I feel like she is everything that I have been searching for in a partner. I realize that our relationship is still very young and of course there is still time for ...
A. 7 February 2021: I'm absolutely with Ciar.
Your GF's parents are as ignorant and prejudice towards non-Muslims as your parents are toward Muslims.
Converting (regardless of WHAT religion you convert to) should NEVER be done lightly. It's not a hat you can take... (read in full...)
How long do I wait? Stuck in a LDR
Q. Hi I’m in a long distance relationship for a few years now. I’m older and settled in career but he is not. He stilll trying to find his feet. When we talk about marriage, every time he says not now, firstly not ready, then he wants thing in l...
A. 7 February 2021: You know HE can biologically play the waiting game longer than you. You (as a woman) DO have a "fertility expiration "date", whereas men can father children in their 70+
So for you, marriage AND children is a must. It's something you have bee... (read in full...)
Dating a good guy but I have trust issues
Q. I have really bad trust issues and don't know how to get over them. I met my partner just over two years ago he's in his 40s,supportive, caring, works hard, there is a 18 years age gap between us am younger so tbh great at helping sort problems...
A. 5 February 2021: I have to agree with Kenny.
It is absolutely unfair of you to "blame" issues that a former partner mistreated you. It's not your NEW partner's fault. You can't hold HIM responsible for things another person did. It's illogical.
While I GET i... (read in full...)
My online girlfriend always wanted to fight with me
Q. Hi This may be a long one, but I will try to keep it simple. Basically I met a girl (online because of the pandemic) and we have been chatting, everything was going fine at first until recently when she wants to fight with me every 2-3 days. ...
A. 5 February 2021: OP, let her go.
The one that is focused on money is HER. Send her back the designer scarf and cut all contact.
I think she is trying to not only bully you but take advantage of you.
"She keeps insisting that I am a terrible person, she can... (read in full...)
Is it possible to rekindle a relationship with an ex?
Q. Does anyone have any advice on winning back an ex boyfriend? I truly loved him and we both had minor bumps throughout the relationship but ultimately parted ways. At first he seemed hesitant about the possibility of it working in the future but then ...
A. 5 February 2021: I think it all depends on why you broke up.
If that is an issue that can't or hasn't be resolved it's not likely that you will make a healthy go at it in the future.
When people END relationship is it USUALLY because things don't work. It c... (read in full...)
My husband's small penis doesn't satisfy me
Q. I have been married for 7 years and 2mths. I love my husband, but as of lately, the size of his penis bothers me. In fact, for quite sometime I wished he had a larger penis. He has been the only man I have ever had sex with, he makes me orgasm ...
A. 4 February 2021: How do you get over it?
By getting over yourself.
There is NOTHING he can do about the size of his penis. So you being MAD or UPSET that it isn't bigger is unfair. What if he was upset about your vagina? It's too big? How would you feel? You wo... (read in full...)
Where do I draw the line between anything anymore?
Q. I am not sure where to begin. I don't know where everything began or how to draw the line anymore. Upbringing was messy: Dad was a heavy drinker and got violent when set off. Once set off it resulted in hospital jail or both. His drinking was 1-2 ...
A. 4 February 2021: Maybe she is your age because it's a "safe age" for your "inner child".
It's impossible to say. Generally, imaginary friends are usually for younger kids. Not that of an 11 year old but given your history, she was the only SAFE thing in your lif... (read in full...)
My boyfriend told me he needed space to go "find himself" in a tropical destination. He said our relationship is over. Should I move on?
Q. I have a very big decision to make and I could use some advice from the good people here at Dear Cupid. My boyfriend ended our 2 year relationship a few months ago and travelled to a tropical destination; he has been there since. He said he neede...
A. 4 February 2021: My guess?
He is not in a tropical place to escape you. He is there to re-kindle his marriage and work on it with the wife. I say that because SHE is there too and he was so adamant about YOU not contacting him.
I would be surprised if he ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is in contact with her former FWB on a daily basis
Q. Hey there. So my girlfriend had a FWB before we got together (been together for 6 months now). She told me she cut it off when we started seeing eachother. A couple of days ago, I found out that she is texting him, quite heavly (almost on a daily ba...
A. 4 February 2021: Well, you have a couple of options.
1. ASK her how she would feel if you still "chatted" to girls you used to date or gave sex with.
2. Decide if you are OK with this or not. If you are NOT then SHE isn't the one for you. Because it's NOT you... (read in full...)
I agreed to get married but I'm not sure if its the right thing to do
Q. I [28F] have a successful career and live in a different country to my family. They have been putting huge pressure on me to meet guys they set me up with and get married. I have never had trouble dating but it's been a while since I've had a long ...
A. 3 February 2021: Talk to your parents? Sooner rather than later.
Maybe ask for a longer engagement so you can feel more SURE of your own feelings?
... (read in full...)
My ex blew me off, but he won't stop contacting me
Q. My ex and met on Face book 10 years ago and we hit it off. However, after 5 months he broke it off because he felt like we don’t live within reasonable distance to support a relationship. We live 5 hours away from each other of driving distance. We ...
A. 3 February 2021: If Facebook is part of your "business" have someone (or do it yourself) BLOCK this guy at every turn - it might take some extra WORK on your side, but if you KEEP entertaining him by answering him and playing HIS game, the LONGER it will take for ... (read in full...)
My LDR husband is asking for $4000
Q. Hi and thanks I wrote here before about my husband. I received alot of good advice. So we have been married for 4 years. We don't live together yet. He doesn't live where I do, so I was working on his visa. We have spent alot of time tog...
A. 3 February 2021: You seem to have figured out what you need to do:
"This has made me think, I will just let him stay where he is and I continue my life here."
I think, YOU are right. He isn't looking to come and share your life, share expenses and experiences ... (read in full...)
Is it time to let these friendships go?
Q. Ok, so I'm reevaluating my life. I have a few friends that I've known since middle school. I left and went away for college and me and them stayed friends. My question: is it time to let the friendships go? One friend gave a guy that I liked, th...
A. 2 February 2021: It seems like you are utterly passive in your own life.
She gave a guy the wrong number for you. Well, shit happens, if you were TRULY interested you would have given him YOUR number yourself. And if HE was TRULY interested, he would have gotten y... (read in full...)
My ex blew me off, but he won't stop contacting me
Q. My ex and met on Face book 10 years ago and we hit it off. However, after 5 months he broke it off because he felt like we don’t live within reasonable distance to support a relationship. We live 5 hours away from each other of driving distance. We ...
A. 2 February 2021: If you are 18-21 and you met 10 years ago, maybe it didn't work out then because of age?
I mean I don't think that many 8-11 year old can HAVE a relationship as it is, not can they drive 5 hours regardless.
So either you put your age wrong o... (read in full...)
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