Any kind words or bits of advice on surviving this breakup?
Q. Hey guys. I'm an regular aunt on this page. I'm in need of some help and kind words myself at this moment. My gf broke up with me a couple of days ago and I'm hurting really badly. She has serious anxiety and has difficulty separating one is...
A. 7 November 2013: Knowing that someone has issues and the living with someone with issues are two VERY different things.
A good partner and a loving relationship can help anyone a lot, but if can't FIX the issues, therapy can help give her tools, but again SHE need... (read in full...)
Boyfriend watching mother/son porn,should I be worried???
Q. I've been in relationship with this guy for 8 months( we are same age),and I always knew he likes older women witch i think its normal,but recently I find out he was watching porn mother son type ,where guy is seduce by his mother while dad is at ...
A. 6 November 2013: One thing would be liking to watch mature women or MILF's but mom/son porn? Gross.
Sorry, there is no way I could move past that.... (read in full...)
I want him to respect me and want me again, but am I pushing him away?
Q. So I've posted here twice the last week about my ex who I've been dating for 2 months. We broke up because I started pressuring him for more of a commitment. He wasn't ready. Weve been fighting for 2 weeks. He finally called me a drama queen and ...
A. 6 November 2013: Honestly, IT was a 2 MONTHS relationship. YOU TWO barely got started and it got THAT complicated THAT fast? You know that should tell you it's NOT going to work long term.
The first two months is still the courting stage, where you go out on dates... (read in full...)
I need help accepting separate nights out. Please help!
Q. I need help. I seriously dislike when my boyfriend goes to bars or clubs without me. It's not logical, per se. For example, tonight I went for two drinks with a friend I hadn't seen in 3 years. But that was 7pm and I'm home at 11pm. I also told him...
A. 6 November 2013: I think you need to sit him down one day and tell him, I'm not having a problem with you going out with friends, but I would like that you would give me a heads up, JUST like I do with you.
It can be that easy.
Also for your relationship to ... (read in full...)
Confused by this man dipping in and out of my life, saying he's not ready for a GF. I like him. What do I do?
Q. Please I need help. I am mature going to school, and working at the same time living my life like any individual do but I can't figure out what is happening to me. I met a guy about a month a go and everything was perfect in the beginning, he was c...
A. 6 November 2013:
UNNECESSARY DRAMA! That is what he is.
If you don't want to date a smoker, then don't date one. But telling a guy you JUST met he has to quit to date you is, well ridiculous. You don't date someone who is "sorta OK" but if you can "just" chang... (read in full...)
Advise on friends with benefits, please. I have no one to talk to about this.
Q. So if you read my previous post some months ago a guy I am very interested in gave me his number, I texted him went out a few times and within a week of going out we became physical. But now am totally heart broken because after our first time tog...
A. 6 November 2013: Honey, STOP letting someone "bully" you into something you don't WANT TO DO.
You don't want a FWB, you TOLD him that, you told him to STOP texting you and yet, he respected NOTHING you say. Because he KNOWS exactly what to say to get what he want ... (read in full...)
I've been a little obsessive about looking at my ex's facebook and pictures, I know it hurts my girlfriend, what should I do?
Q. Hi all, So I broke it off with my controlling ex girlfriend over three years ago, we were together for about a year and a half and she had a young son from a previous relationship. She didn't treat me well and while I sort of hate her, it's more tha...
A. 6 November 2013: You know what you are doing is "wrong" and hurtful and I want to bet if your GF did what you are DOING you would be mad and hurt.
So what do you do? FREAKING EASY! you UNFRIEND the EX, you BLOCK her and DELETE her from your life (that includes... (read in full...)
Any kind words or bits of advice on surviving this breakup?
Q. Hey guys. I'm an regular aunt on this page. I'm in need of some help and kind words myself at this moment. My gf broke up with me a couple of days ago and I'm hurting really badly. She has serious anxiety and has difficulty separating one is...
A. 6 November 2013: First I'm sorry it came to what it came to, but I think YOU know that you HAD to keep your word. Just like you expected her to keep hers.
Therapy can help, but it's not an instant fix. She was sure to have relapses, the thing is if her actions ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with a toxic person who wants to be my friend? I'm reluctant about this situation
Q. There's this girl I started hanging out with outside of work. At first I thought she was a cool person however after getting to know her, I realised she's a toxic person (being negative about everything) and has disappointed me a few times (like ta...
A. 6 November 2013: I think Janniepeg put it very nicely. You kind of have to TELL her you aren't interested in her friendship, and why
(if she asks).
Also, here is my thing if I'm talking to someone and a coworker comes over, butts in and then starts to put me do... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is keeping track of our sex life online. What should I do?
Q. I saw on my boyfriends computer history a site to [site url removed per site guidelines]. Curious, I checked further and he has gone to the site several times. [Name removed] is an online site that keeps track of your sex life, the dates you had ...
A. 6 November 2013: MAJOR creep factor.
If he feels he needs to track it online to see if he gets "enough" or not, he should MAN the Heck up and just VERBALIZE his needs.
Yea, this would be a deal-breaker to me 100%.... (read in full...)
Husband had an affair and then tells me "I chose you". What does that mean?
Q. Hello, To the ladies out there, if a man had an "affair" and you only finds out about a couple of years later, and he says to you, "I chose you, didn't I?" How would you perceive that? To the men, what exactly do you mean by uttering those w...
A. 5 November 2013: I would tell him to Go Fly a Kite. He didn't CHOOSE you. IF he did he wouldn't have had an affair. He SETTLED for you.
Personally, I'd divorce. I would wait around for him to cheat and "choose" me again or "choose" another woman. I'm not a car or... (read in full...)
He wants to meet in person but I'm afraid
Q. I've recently met this guy online who is 8 years older then me. I like him soo much but we haven't met in person yet. On my profile I have pictures of my face not my body, he hasn't asked me for a picture of my body yet and the one that I do ha...
A. 5 November 2013: Meet him sooner rather then later. Using old photos is understandable specially of you have some you really like but it IS a little bit like false advertising, isn't it? Though if you think about it, I'm sure he didn't post a bad photo of himself ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has been Facebook stalking his exes
Q. my boyfriend is so loving and affectionate and happy, he always says he just wants me to be happy too and we have good physical attraction. We laugh a lot and have fun and spend most of our free time together as we live together (his choice). I...
A. 5 November 2013: Have you asking him?
WHY he feels a need to keep taps on the ex who treated him like shit?
For me, people who keep taps (as often as your BF) there has to be some unfinished business. Maybe he is hoping she will either get hit by the Karma bus... (read in full...)
Need advice on a connection I made online that's got messy please.
Q. This may be long but please bear with me I really need some insight from everyone. So I'll start with I'm a 28 y/o lesbian and about four months ago I did the whole online dating profile thing and found a young lady who seemed more or less interest...
A. 5 November 2013: Either find a way to block that number or change your phone number.
And just stop talking to her. I'm sure she will find someone else to drain the life out of and waste their time.... (read in full...)
People tell me I should get to know him but something about him makes me uneasy
Q. Why do I feel strange round this older man? There is a man I have recently met (few weeks) and everyone seems to love him he is charming, a great speaker, and in his 40s but for some reason I just don't feel comfortable around him, I hate it when I ...
A. 5 November 2013: Listen to your gut.
CMMP put it well, WHY should you HAVE to be around someone that makes you feel uncomfortable? WHY?
I strongly believe there is a REASON we get that gut feeling or "warning" bells around some people, don't ignore it.
An... (read in full...)
His ex wife now wants my husband to have supervised visits because his daughter seen us have an argument!
Q. My husbands ex wife want hem to start having supervice visitation with their 14year old daughter. All because her daughter told her that we had a argument in front of her and that she no longer wants to come over because of that.witch I could ...
A. 5 November 2013: First of that would be between the court-ordered visitations, whatever is in the divorce decree or whatever is ARRANGED between the FATHER and the MOTHER.
It has nothing to do with YOUR 2 year old. You BF and his Ex-wife will have to sort this out... (read in full...)
Who should I go for? My fiance William or my soul mate Andy?
Q. I am at a relationship crossroads. I met my college sweetheart "Andy" when I was 18. We were friends for a year, and then dated for 3 and had planned to marry someday. We had typical young love problems and broke up when we graduated. He went to ...
A. 4 November 2013: Cut poor William lose, seems like he is your "spare" or your "well if I can't get better I'll settle for William". Wow. I find that kind of cold.
You never got over Andy, he never got over you either, so that makes you both not really accessib... (read in full...)
He takes ages to reply to my messages!
Q. I'm currently dating this guy and have been for a few months...we see each other only about twice a week as we both work full time. During the time we don't see each other we message. But my problem is that 80% of the time he won't respond to...
A. 4 November 2013: Have you asked him?
Many people do not USE texts as a way of communicating, they use it for short messages. Like, I'm late will be there in 30 min.// Remember 2% milk. Not for actual chatting.
If YOU need him to text you more or aren't sure w... (read in full...)
I'm afraid of the reaction I'll get if I tell my boyfriend I love him
Q. Hi, my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a year. His name is Jamie. I feel like I'm ready to tell him that I love him. I still get butterflies like when we first met. I feel so comfortable with him. He lets me fart in front of him and ...
A. 4 November 2013: *****What if Jamie's response is the same?****
Then you are missing the point. NOT everyone tosses ILY around like it doesn't mean that much. Others SHOW it more then say it and then there are the cautious ones, such as you, who don't say it in fe... (read in full...)
I'm 33 and need to make up my mind on whether to have a baby or not?
Q. Hey! I've just turned 33 and I have a good life. I own my house, have great permanent job, I'm married to the love of my life and have no financial worries. So, it's smooth sailing. Thing is, I'm getting old and I must make up my mind whether to ...
A. 4 November 2013: There is NOTHING wrong in not really wanting children. It's not being selfish, it's being smart.
Plenty of kids out there need help, help that you can give.
Having a child because UH! that is what people are supposed to do, is not the right ch... (read in full...)
My boyfriend isn't able to cum by vaginal sex. Why?
Q. My bf is very sexually aggressive and likes to dominate and humiliate me sexually and that's okay with me. The thing that bothers me though is that he only ejaculates if I stimulate him orally for over 30 minutes or if we do anal. Why that? He is ...
A. 4 November 2013: Doubt it you, sounds more like he is VERY (or rather too used) to a VERY firm hand. A vagina is not giving the same hard grip (for the most part) as a hand or the anus.
Does he jerk off a lot? Because it sounds to me that he is more "conditi... (read in full...)
My new boyfriend is depressed and cuts people, including me, off. What should I do?
Q. Okay so I don't know what's going on. A few weeks ago I started dating my boyfriend. Everything was going well, and we were both so into each other, but all of the sudden, one night he started acting distant and funny towards not just me, but ...
A. 4 November 2013: I will 3rd YouWish and second Cindy.
THIS is not your battle to fight or your issues to fix. LOVE can not fix this. HE HAS to seek help, TAKE the help and do the work to overcome depression.
Been there, done that. Still have the T-shirt in c... (read in full...)
Why did my friend behave this way?
Q. Why does this girl behave this way? So I have this friend she's been calling me her best friend for years and a few months ago she has been hanging out with this girl and she sees her more than me. She never let me see her niece but she's ...
A. 4 November 2013: Well, seems like you didn't lose a friend but lost a drama-llama.
I don't really see what the problem is? She doesn't sound like a BFF - more like someone who used you for company and you used back.
How about you try and make some new friends... (read in full...)
I don't want to be a fool and develop feelings if she's just being flirty
Q. Hi! I could use some advice. I'm 22 male. I met this girl(25f) in one of my courses. I had noticed her checking me out and I also flirted with her a little bit. We ended up a group partner for the assignments. When I met her for the assignment f...
A. 4 November 2013: Nope she is being super flirty. I would NOT take that serious at all.
She likes the fact that you LIKE her and she LOVES the attention. There is a name for girls like that but I'm not a fan if it, Attention Whore. But really, that is what she is. ... (read in full...)
Is dripping in sweat normal when you both have sex together??
Q. My boyfriend and I are dripping in sweat when we have sex together. I mean, it is as if somebody sprayed a hose on both of us. Dripping wet in tons and tons of sweat!! Lol Is this NORMAL at all? And... we usually fog up all the windows ...
A. 4 November 2013: Ha! I'm with C. Grant!
Go for it, FOG up all the windows and enjoy it!
Best cardio workout around!... (read in full...)
We've been having NSA sex and I'm confused
Q. Female, 17. Soooo...there's this guy and we've been having sex on and off (no strings attached) for about a year and some change. I know he's having sex with other people...and I'm not. It kind of makes me jealous that he can just go around having ...
A. 4 November 2013: I agree fully with iAmHereToHelpYou - casual sex, FWB is NOT for those really young and with little experience in relationship and all things sexually.
It's NOT for newbies so to speak. It numbs you to the thoughts and ideas that SEX with som... (read in full...)
I'm having trouble accepting her story about this "friend"
Q. Hi. I have a situation where I need an objective opinion before I act with too much haste and ruin everything. I have been with my fiancée for a little over two years now and I thought everything was going great up until about a week ago. S...
A. 3 November 2013: Honestly, I don't blame how you feel. EVEN if I do find it really underhanded how you are gathering all your Intel on her and him.
TO BE FRANK - I think she is full of BULL SHOT.
IF he is THAT important to her, second "daddy" he would KNOW sh... (read in full...)
Is my husband picking up vibes between me and another man?
Q. The other day, my husband and I got together with a couple for dinner. I know the couple well enough, and my husband was meeting them officially for the first time. To make a long story short, I have shared a "look" with the husband of this other ...
A. 3 November 2013: I think he sensed something was odd in the man's behavior. Not necessarily that you "shared" a moment with the guy.... (read in full...)
Is this "friendship" break doable or should we take a real break to reevaluate our relationship?
Q. My boyfriend and I are taking a friendship break (a break from our relationship, not talk except the day we would hang out once a week as friends, and not see other people) Hopefully for not more than 2 weeks. We love each, but fight a lot. So he ...
A. 3 November 2013: How is the break going to fix any issues? It's is JUST a break from all the things that are BROKEN with the relationship, such as compromising and communication. Taking a break will NOT fix this. You two might get back together and then go RIGHT ... (read in full...)
Need advice on a connection I made online that's got messy please.
Q. This may be long but please bear with me I really need some insight from everyone. So I'll start with I'm a 28 y/o lesbian and about four months ago I did the whole online dating profile thing and found a young lady who seemed more or less interest...
A. 3 November 2013: Cut all contact. Let her know you are having to let her go, then either block her or change your number. Giving her your address weren't so smart, but can be fixed. Any mail you receive you return (put addressee unknown, return to sender in black ... (read in full...)
He says he's confused about whether he wants to be in a relationship
Q. Ok, so I have this best friend, we were friends for about a year and then we became really close friends for about another year. Then we started dating and we really liked each other. We were going out for like 4 months.. then he went a bit cold and ...
A. 3 November 2013: Neither of you are sure what you want and all the PDA and sex is confusing the picture.
Back off from him, it will be WAY easier for him to decide. So no more sex, no more cuddles and hanging out, cut the texting down to a bare minimum.
If you ... (read in full...)
Married but in love with another
Q. I got married 3 yrs ago, but fell in love with someone else. I don't want to hurt my wife, but can't help thinking about the other women. I know the other women also loves me, and will wait an eternity for me. My wife is 20 yrs younger than me, but ...
A. 3 November 2013: So why did you get married and stay married if there is little affection?
And why is it OK to get emotionally attached to someone else instead of either ending the marriage or fixing it? Adding another person to the mix isn't doing anything... (read in full...)
Was my ex emotionally abusive to me?
Q. Was I in an emotionally abusive relationship? At first my ex was very loving and the perfect gentleman. After a little while he stopped having sex with me, stopped giving me physical affection and began completely ignoring me, even when I was in t...
A. 3 November 2013: Don't worry about him or trying to figure him out. He was not who you though he was or who you wanted him to be. He was just a sad sack of shallow man-folk and NOW you are rid of him.
Good for you to block and un-friend him, there was no need to ... (read in full...)
Do I tell this online man that I was being coached on what to say to him?
Q. Hi everyone, I just started chatting with a guy online who is a Marine. I consider myself fairly intelligent but when it comes to knowing things about being in the service, I don't know anything. My ex-husband talked to me about him. He also knows ...
A. 3 November 2013: I'm with BrokenV
Then thing is though, stop trying to "know" stuff you don't know.
Don't try and impress with knowledge that isn't yours, because it isn't WHO you are.
As you get to know him I would tell him about the ADD. I would not re... (read in full...)
I know he just got out of a relationship ...
Q. I really hope and pray someone can please help me out. When I was young about 14 or so I was at a party and I met this guy we made out, then at one point we went outside and walked to a park and just talked. At that time he was a bit older so when ...
A. 3 November 2013: I see you answered your own question, so not sure why you posted it on DC.
A reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2013):
This is verified as being by the original poster of the question
So you made out with him, did you fake your age or you... (read in full...)
What goes through a 16 year old girl's head? I'm 21 and not sure
Q. Hello everyone(: So there's this girl, she's 16 Then there's me, I'm 21. One day on Facebook she posted a sad status about how her ex done her wrong so I messaged her and told her to keep her head up because one day she would find a guy who would ...
A. 3 November 2013: I see I wasn't the only one who scoffed at the "save the illegal speech" part.
It shows why you think she is so mature, YOU are yourself incredible immature.
16 year old girls are QUITE capable of seeming mature, I know, because I used t... (read in full...)
How can girls be good enough to have sex with but not good enough to date?
Q. There is this guy and I really really like him and he talks to me all the time and is really sweet to me and also he's so good looking. I have known him for a very long time but we hadnt talked for over a year then he finally started talking to me ...
A. 3 November 2013: Learn from this.
Even if you FEEL like you have known him for ages (which you really haven't in the way you would have if you actually DATED him) - you were still available for sex the first night he ""took" you out. Though "hanging" out at his p... (read in full...)
How can I remain strong once my lying cheating ex begins his apologetic stage?
Q. Hello and thanks I just broke up with my bf yesterday and I'm feeling saddened that it had to come to this. We were together on and off for 3 yrs. We had issues yrs ago when I caught him cheating with two different women online one woman was hi...
A. 3 November 2013: How do you remain strong? You CUT the contact 100%. You do not let him sweet talk his way back in.
Why did you keep doing that to yourself? Taking him back after what he did? And then putting up with him having trust, jealousy and possessi... (read in full...)
Does this mean she wants a threesome?
Q. Hey guys and gals I am new here and just have a question about my sex life with my girlfriend I was wondering I can get your thoughts on. I have been with my girlfriend for 6 years now. Shes the mother of my two kids 4 and 7 months. Been through...
A. 3 November 2013: I'm with SVC - she does it because it gets YOU hot. It's as close as you will get to a 3-some. Roleplaying your fantasy with a "finger".
No, it surely doesn't mean she wants another person in her bed or the relationship.
How do you bring it up?... (read in full...)
Should you reveal what you did in the past?
Q. What does everyone think about revealing a shameful episode of cheating on a previous partner to a future partner? If cheating took place in a long , supposedly committed relationship, and went on for a few months then is this something that n...
A. 3 November 2013: Personally, if I was dating a guy who told me about his past cheating, I would most likely end it. Because I don't believe in people stopping a habit like that.
And I would DUMP the person if they didn't tell me and I still found out.
So it's... (read in full...)
He has made me so angry! How can I make myself calm down?
Q. I am so angry and don't know were to begin with this....I will explain as best I can so please be patient... my boyfriend has an ex wife and two kids of 15 and 17. I am finding it hard to trust him lately as he keeps going out for hours and I get ...
A. 3 November 2013: I have to say, I understand your anger. Without a doubt. And I think like WiseOwlE said, you are more angry at yourself then him, because you saw this coming over and over and you allowed it in the past because that is what you thought was expected ... (read in full...)
How can I get my dear bunny girlfriend back?
Q. Six weeks ago, I met a beautiful young woman online who I ended up falling head over heels in love with. She was affectionate, caring, beautiful, we got on fantastically, the sex was amazing, and she seemed to be into me just as much as I was into ...
A. 3 November 2013: I have to agree, it's not about your age it's about all the little untold truth.
1. Most women are smart. IF a guy lives with his "ex" it's more common then not that he is still involved with her, one way or another.
2. you lied about your ... (read in full...)
Was my ex emotionally abusive to me?
Q. Was I in an emotionally abusive relationship? At first my ex was very loving and the perfect gentleman. After a little while he stopped having sex with me, stopped giving me physical affection and began completely ignoring me, even when I was in t...
A. 14 October 2013: Good for you for leaving after 4 years of that!
Was what I would call emotionally abusive - in a way he was, but more over, I think he was really just enormously selfish and emotional unavailable. His whole world was supposed to revolve around h... (read in full...)
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