I met him on Tinder and am wondering what he is aiming for?
Q. Hello everyone! I need some advice. I've met a guy on Tinder (an app that has a certain reputation) a week ago. He was quite friendly, charming and caring. We talked about our hobbies, school (we're enrolled in university) and just general stu...
A. 3 February 2016: Heheh, thanks for clarifying :)
How can you tell? Little hard so early on, but someone who jumps to sex talk fast, might be more focused on sex than something serious - however, if you meet up and are upfront about NOT wanting to be sexual t... (read in full...)
I met him on Tinder and am wondering what he is aiming for?
Q. Hello everyone! I need some advice. I've met a guy on Tinder (an app that has a certain reputation) a week ago. He was quite friendly, charming and caring. We talked about our hobbies, school (we're enrolled in university) and just general stu...
A. 2 February 2016: OP can you clarify what a "hooker" is?
In English it's a prostitute, but I don't think that is what you mean?... (read in full...)
Can a player fall in love????
Q. Hi there,thanks for reading my post. I am talking with a guy online. met him two times. he is 10years older then me. I am 36 he is 47.I really like him. but I felt he is player. I am interested to know can a player fall in love? Like, a guy wh...
A. 2 February 2016: Saying that he is serious about being with ONE person, is NOT the same as saying he wants to BE with you. And NOT trying to get you to bed doesn't mean he is serious either. He is after all an EXPERIENCED player so he probably know what works and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is always late and doesn't see anything wrong with it
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year. We live 40 mins apart. I get very irritated because he is always late with me it seems. I am a punctual type of person and if I happen to run late I will apologize and let the person know and get ...
A. 2 February 2016: I'm with Auntie BimBim.
I HATE people being late. ABSOLUTELY hate it. I think CONSTANTLY being late is a sign of disrespect and... taking someone for granted. "Oh, I said 5 but show up at 7, she won't mind she has nothing better to do but wait for... (read in full...)
Why has my BF stepped up, now that he's heard that another guy likes me?
Q. Why would your BF of over 2 years suddenly start paying more attention to you? It seems he was taking me a little for granted...... UNTIL... He found out there was some good looking guy asking his friends about me and saying how beaut...
A. 2 February 2016: Maybe he just don't want to to "look for greener grass" when he is right there. I think it's a GOOD thing that he stepped it up, and I sincerely hope that you don't "play" on the fact that there is another guy interested.
Relationships gets to ... (read in full...)
My Gf says I'm boring. So what nice things can I do for her, other than buying her things?
Q. She's my first girlfriend and we've been together almost a year. It seems she has always wanted me to be more of a boyfriend and do more things for her, though she's told me I'm getting better at it and then she'll just tell me again later she still ...
A. 2 February 2016: I's BOT about buying her "stuff". (or it shouldn't be). Bit maybe plan some dates that doesn't involve sitting around watching TV or you playing computer games (if that is the issue).
What is available in your town or neighboring town, that mig... (read in full...)
Are my expectations too high? Alternatively, does he expect too much of me?
Q. Let's imagine you're in a LDR. This is your 10+ time flying to meet your boyfriend. Beginning with the previous visit, due to his car not being drivable, he asks you to get a rental at the airport. During the previous visit (which was 3 months a...
A. 2 February 2016: He isn't asking to keep the rental and you paying it is he?
He is just expecting YOU to have wheels while there, because he doesn't.
Is he working? How much is the cost of the repairs?
Second time I visited my BF (now husband) I rented a... (read in full...)
Shall I continue with this charade, in an effort to expose his cheating ?
Q. Hi, I am little embarrassed to say this but I just found a profile of my bf on match.com, the profile is active and it has his name and age and a couple photos also.. He says he's single and looking for female from 21-34. He's 29. I am 37... I feel ...
A. 2 February 2016: I agree with Denizen,
Who get in the gutter with him? How is that going to help you? It's not like you will get to feel better or get "closure" from it.
I'd just end it. Let him wonder why.
My guess is, if you set up a "blind date" and shows... (read in full...)
Fiance talking to ex and hiding it... please help! It's a difficult situation
Q. Dear Cupid, I have posted on this website couple of times about concerns (I posted when he forgot about my birthday) I have about my fiance and coming back here to seek support and answers makes me realize how unhealthy my relationship is....
A. 2 February 2016: Look into getting an extended work-visa so you don't HAVE to marry this guy to stay in the USA.
He really doesn't CARE how it affects you and he ONLY agreed to the exes are off limits to placate you. And well, so far it has worked.
Why mar... (read in full...)
Am I being overly sensitive about how my parents handled the loan?
Q. Hi, I am a 49yo professional woman with a stable spouse and a successful career. I have owned my own business now for 10 years. My husband and I have been married for 24 years and we have zero debt. Eight years ago, we had borrowed $100,000 from my ...
A. 1 February 2016: $100,000 is a lot of money. And I presume they wanted to make sure you fulfilled your original obligations. And a loan of this size HAS a bearing to the "estate" as well, in case something happened to them, all loans etc. needs to be accounted ... (read in full...)
How do I navigate asking to have the one child over without inviting her kids?
Q. My male cousin died a few years ago. Ever since I have gotten his 4 children together for visits. They are half siblings and don't see each other unless I get them. Recently one child was placed in the custody of my female cousin (his sister). Sh...
A. 1 February 2016: Just call and ask if you can pick up "Bob" on Saturday so he and go see his siblings. Don't mention her kids. If she does bring it up suggest you can make an outing with HER kids and Bob another time.
... (read in full...)
Did my friend stop all contact with me because it will never go further than friendship?
Q. dear cupids, i am a survivor of an abusive relation ship, 8 month after the break up i met some one, we had so much fun, but due to religious issues we did not stay together as friends and we agreed on staying friends, 1 month after the agreem...
A. 1 February 2016: I suggest that maybe you try and make female friends, less room for anyone to overstep boundaries.
He should have kept his lips to himself - though there is nothing sexual in a kiss on the forehead, that is what a parent do to a kid.
Could i... (read in full...)
He wants sex almost every night! Is this normal?
Q. How often do couples have sex? I have been with my partner for just under 2 years and feel he always wants sex. I have a 3 year old from a previous relationship. So some nights I am just too tired and want to just sleep. Then he sulks if I say no or ...
A. 1 February 2016: It might BE normal for him. And normal for you to not want it as much. It's pretty common that people don't always have the same sex drive through out the relationship as their partner.
I think you need to to talk to him. Because if you start fe... (read in full...)
I'm afraid I'm starting to get some kind of sex dysfunction but I'm not sure why this would happen
Q. 51 y.o. male here. I no my body very well and I take care of it. I workout every other day and I take vitamin and enzyme and amino acid by the handful. I use the Paleo diet, only drink mineral water, eat a lot of eggs everyday, I avoid gluten and ...
A. 1 February 2016: Go see your doctor, best thing you can do.... (read in full...)
Is it normal for a guy to only want anal and never vaginal sex?
Q. I recently met a guy from a dating site. The first time we met, we engaged in anal sex without a condom (he had a fantasy of ejaculating inside my anus) as a way to avoid pregnancy. Everytime we meet he only wants to have anal and never vaginal. ...
A. 1 February 2016: No it doesn't sound normal on EITHER of you side.
WHY on EARTH have sex that you don't enjoy? You think you will keep him around if you do what HE wants? What about what YOU want? What you enjoy?
And him! Why on EARTH does he keep having sex ... (read in full...)
He never asks me out just talks to me on the phone and he lies to me!
Q. dear cupid, this guy i fell in love with i been talk over three years over the phone. he never ask me out all he whats to talk over the phone he tells me his marry and has kids. but hes not marry or has any kids and most of the time he likes to talk ...
A. 1 February 2016: If he hasn't made a move in 3 years, you can ask till you are blue in the face - he is NOT going to ask you out.
So if I were you I'd cut out the flirting and the sexy talk and treat him like a friend only. Look elsewhere for a BF/partn... (read in full...)
How could I be so dumb?
Q. How come I was so dumb, I work hard at my job, single parent, an now my teenager, had a baby, so, I take of a baby now too, I met someone, everything was going great I thought, I treated her like women always said, they like being treated, like an ...
A. 1 February 2016: It happens that you don't pick a "winner". No need to beat yourself up over that. If you had a LOT of women who likes you, it shouldn't be too hard finding a good one.
And maybe, dear OP go slow. You said it was a 2 months? relationship? So while... (read in full...)
On average how many weeks should yu message someone online before suggesting meeting?
Q. I am a gay female,retrying online dating. On average how many weeks should yu message someone online before suggesting meeting? I have met people before online but the site I'm on now is different. We were matched 3.5 weeks ago and ha...
A. 1 February 2016: I would stop hinting, it's up there with mind reading. People just don't get it.
I'd say after 3-5 week of chatting online it's definitely OK to ask them out. Like Auntie Cindy said, you weren't looking for a pen-pal.
Ask her if she is comfor... (read in full...)
When someone just disappears is it your fault?
Q. When you treat some one special, then they disappear, with out even a good bye, after months of pure joy, is it your fault, especially when you thought you both felt the same way...
A. 1 February 2016: I agree with the other aunties, have you checked? Facebook, phone, family, friends?
If you have and she just don't want contact then who knows.
It seems to be the "popular mode of dumping people" these days by "ghosting" them. Which means you ... (read in full...)
If he's really interested wouldn't he make more of an effort to see me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been out of the dating world for awhile so looking for advice. I met a man on-line, he lives fairly close to me, has a good job, I know he is really single, my age, no children, but the only days he would see me would be on Wedne...
A. 1 February 2016: I think the fact that he DIDN'T call says a lot. If he was so confused, why not call and see if it could be sorted out?
I think you did the right thing as well.
Upward and onward.... (read in full...)
I feel trapped. Is changing my identity and starting afresh an option to deal with my wish to be single and free?
Q. Ok so I think there is something really wrong with me. I have never had any desire to get married or have a family-I'm 36. For the past couple of years in been fantasizng of changing my identity and leaving my life and starting fresh.... I just...
A. 1 February 2016: I don't think running away from life will "fix" how you feel. I suggest you talk to your husband and maybe a counselor.
Running would be "acceptable" if you did out out of fear for your life, but not because you are bored or want somethin... (read in full...)
I've been dreaming of my ex. Should I send him a valentine message?
Q. Please help me make a decision. I meet up with my first love in the Summer last year. It was great seeing him after not seeing him for over 10 years. We dated a few times, the chemistry between us was amazing. After date 2 he really came on t...
A. 31 January 2016:
I think Valentine's are for "lovers" not friends. So if you see him as a friend you can send him a card or message, but I wouldn't make it a Valentine's one.... (read in full...)
My husband is demanding a MMF and I want no part of it. Where is this coming from?
Q. My husband of 37 years is now demanding an mmf. He also recently started working his finger in my anus during intercourse and insists on oral from me right after sex without wiping my juices off of his penis. I don't know where this is coming from. ...
A. 31 January 2016: Sounds like a couple possible reasons:
Him wanting to spice up the sex life
OR
Him watching too much porn lately and is now treating you like you are some sexual "prop" in his own little porn.
OR
He wants to cheat and my goading you ... (read in full...)
How do I handle this invitation?
Q. I am in a conundrum! So I am planning a destination wedding. Mostly to weed out a lot of family members I have no close relation too. This way it will be simple, relaxed, and a nice time with people I care about and care about me. I recentl...
A. 31 January 2016:
Your fiance is right though, it's always a good idea to clear things like WHOM to invite to your wedding before "casually" inviting someone.
Is there any chance they will show up? Have you discussed it further with her?
If not and your... (read in full...)
If he's really interested wouldn't he make more of an effort to see me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been out of the dating world for awhile so looking for advice. I met a man on-line, he lives fairly close to me, has a good job, I know he is really single, my age, no children, but the only days he would see me would be on Wedne...
A. 31 January 2016: **I told him I was no longer interested.**
What was his reply ?
... (read in full...)
What is wrong with me that I get involved with a married man? Why am I such a mess?
Q. What is wrong with me?? Please tell me what's wrong with me. I am ending an alcoholic marriage and am getting divorced. It has been very sad for many years and then i get involved with a married man for the last 18 months cos he was kind and car...
A. 31 January 2016: I don't think you are destined to be a "loser" as you call it. It was ONE married man, one mess up. Now if you were doing this OVER AND OVER ("dating" married guys) I might say maybe, but you have not. So cut yourself some slack.
Accept that eve... (read in full...)
Boyfriend proposed but I feel unsure!
Q. My boyfriend of 8 years proposed! It was a complete shock. We had talked about getting married in the future and joked about it, but I wasn't expecting a proposal! I definitely love him, but I feel more anxious and embarrassed than excited. I ...
A. 31 January 2016: I think it's odd that you feel unsure after 8 year, to be honest. UNLESS marriage was not one of plans for the future, and you say it was something talked about before. I'd say after 8 years you should know if this is the guy you want to marry or ... (read in full...)
If he's really interested wouldn't he make more of an effort to see me?
Q. Dear Cupid, I've been out of the dating world for awhile so looking for advice. I met a man on-line, he lives fairly close to me, has a good job, I know he is really single, my age, no children, but the only days he would see me would be on Wedne...
A. 31 January 2016: I DO think if he was keen on you he would make WAY more effort to hang out, even in bad weather!
And asking at last minute? so bad manners IMHO - because YOU could have made plans, but does he PRESUMES that you sit around and WAIT for him to ask?.... (read in full...)
Should I be worried that I have puffy areolas? I am worried they will be a turn off for guys.
Q. So I'm 16 and I have really puffy areolas. I read somewhere that they level out as puberty progresses but I guess I've passed that stage already and I'm stuck like this. I hate it because I always have to wear a bra, even around the l the house I ...
A. 31 January 2016: No two sets of boobs are identical, no penis, no vagina, no ears or fingerprints.
So your nipples are entirely yours, even if they seem to have a life of their own. If you are lucky (and it sounds that way) you have sensitive nipples and that in ... (read in full...)
Should I face this now? Or wait, to avoid the stress, until baby is born?
Q. In the next 7 week I will be at my due date with my first baby with my boyfriend. Over Christmas my brother fell out with my boyfriend, and my brother kept telling me to dump my boyfriend as he wasn't what I thought he was and I'd be better m...
A. 31 January 2016: What a rotten spot to be in! I'm so sorry!
First off though, forgive your brother. I think he didn't tell you immediately because he wanted to protect you and also stick by this BFF - however he realized he couldn't do both and he KNEW you dese... (read in full...)
My wife of 22 years has no remorse over her cheating. Should we divorce, or do what we want?
Q. I just found out that my wife cheated on me and not the first time and she does not even feel remorse. We have been married for 22 years, both in our 40s. She looks amazing for her age. Men always liked her. we have a grown child and empty nesters....
A. 31 January 2016: Only you can make that choice, so my question to you is... WHAT do you want?
You want a "marriage" of convenience or do you want to be free to pursue happiness with someone else, someone who values YOU as a person, not just as someone they sha... (read in full...)
What can you advise in this situation? It feels like I am option two.
Q. I've been seeing this guy for a few weeks and it's been amazing. The connection is unlike anything I've experienced in such a long time. I started to fall in love with him the second I first saw him. Magic. We love each others company, the sex is t...
A. 31 January 2016: I agree with Denizen too,
HE NEEDS to be upfront with her, and to do it now. IF not, I'd cut the contact and move on. I would NOT want a guy to hold me as a spare in case some "LDR" doesn't work out, HECK NO!
Now if he tells her, I have met ... (read in full...)
I "hooked up" with a guy I hardly know. No sex, but did try to give him a Bj. Will my next experience with a guy be better?
Q. I'm a 16 year old girl and a few months ago I stupidly and carelessly "hooked up" with this guy I didn't know too well. Please don't tell me I'm an idiot because trust me I've told myself that everyday since. Before that I'd never soo much as held...
A. 31 January 2016: Will my next experience be better?
THAT is entirely up to you. Now you know that doing things because you "feel" others expect you to, doesn't mean you HAVE to do them.
Hooking up doesn't work well for people with little to no experience. So... (read in full...)
The cake fiasco. What do you think?
Q. Hi, Hoping for some advice as I'm completely embarrassed and annoyed by a situation! My friend recently turned 30 and for her birthday I had a novelty cake made for her as a surprise. A colleague of mine suggested a lady she knows, who has ...
A. 31 January 2016: You can't really complain to anyone, but her.
IF every detail, from size, to flavor, to filling, design, wording, delivery time, place and date as written down - then FEEL free to leave her a bad review and be specific. ADD a picture (I would) a... (read in full...)
I am feeling sorry for myself, and sorry for the wife of my married lover since we broke up. How do I get over this break-up?
Q. I broke up with a married man two weeks ago. While I am dealing with that and trying to let go, I am also crying over the fact that I will no longer be friends with his wife either. Please don't judge and tell me she is better off without frie...
A. 30 January 2016: Well, hard lesson to learn.
Don't "date" married or guys who are already in a relationship. Because when it ALL goes sideways the only one who really don't get hurt, is the guy who is cheating on his partner. And never the spouse of someone ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend, his Mermaid, and me. Was he disrespectful to add a mermaid? How should I handle this?
Q. I will try to make this short and sweet. My boyfriend (we have been dating for a 1.5 year broke up a few times for 2 weeks). He is a big tattoo guy, He has a sleeve and half a sleeve on the other arm. I don't mind them, as I think they look nic...
A. 30 January 2016: I think you are overreacting. HIS body - HIS choice in decorations. He might not even have supplied what "face" he wanted on his tattoo but left that to the artist, so it's not really like it's another woman on his arm, and... there is no name ... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if this co-worker lied to me. How should I deal with her?
Q. I'm involved in a delicate situation and I may have been lied to and now I'm not sure what to make of it all... There's a girl in my office, she is 19 and a temp- she's been with the company for 5 months. She is quite and just gets on wit...
A. 30 January 2016: Yep, I agree with both Denizen and WiseOwlE
She is starting dram (for whatever reason) and YOU can end up in the cross-hairs too. So GO to your manager first then HR.
No need for you to get lumped in with her.
You said she was fairly youn... (read in full...)
I walked in on my wife while she was performing oral sex. Should I end the marriage?
Q. Me and my wife have been married for 12 years now.I never expected this from her.One day when I got home from work I walked in on her giving head to another man.He immediately ran out of the apartment,didn't even have time to get dressed.In our ...
A. 29 January 2016: I'm with CodeWarrior,
Cheating is a deal-breaker for me. It erodes trust and honestly attract/affections towards the cheater and then WHAT do you have?
I don't think someone can really rebuild the loving trust there USED to be after something ... (read in full...)
I'm worried about spending time with my boyfriend's son. He has behavioral problems
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We moved in together a few months ago, relocated to a new city and all. We're both 27. He has an 8 year old son. I met him when he was a little younger, and we had a good relationship from the start. He se...
A. 29 January 2016: If I were you I'd sit your BF down and have a talk AGAIN. He might be sticking his head in the sand and IGNORING the things that are JUST not good in his son.
Then suggest a few changes.
1. set some parental blocks on the computer. MAKE s... (read in full...)
How do I dump my online match?
Q. I matched with a guy on Tinder and we started talking. He was really nice and our personalities clicked. But when we met in person there was no sexual attraction. Also, the fact that he's 31 and has never had a relationship longer than 1 month kinda ...
A. 29 January 2016: I'm not a fan of "ghosting" (basically - ignoring the other party till they figure out you are not interested) I find it in bad taste and manner.
So I'd text him back and tell him, thanks for the offer of a second date, but he is not what you are ... (read in full...)
I like him but am not attracted to him. Will attraction grow?
Q. Hi aunts and uncles, I'm after a bit of relationship advice. I met and have started dating a man through an online dating forum. We get on like a house on fire - same sense of humour, same take on life. We're both quite quirky so it's extremel...
A. 29 January 2016: OP,
For most people and cultures the days of arranged marriages are over. People want to marry for love. They want to marry someone who will be a good fit and good match LONG TERM.
I get that in an arranged marriage there might NOT be one iota ... (read in full...)
Am I just a "hopeful idiot?"
Q. I am a 54 Year Old Man in good shape and I believe I am considered attractive. I had the good fortune to meet an amazing woman 2 and a half years ago through work. She is a waitress and she is 32 years old. I have made a point to keep in contact ...
A. 29 January 2016: Yep. I'm with WiseOwlE
Cute as her text was... the FACT is... YOU are legally a married man. And that means... WHAT do you have to offer her long term?
IF you are looking to date this woman at some point (or ANY woman) get the divorce over and... (read in full...)
Am I just a "hopeful idiot?"
Q. I am a 54 Year Old Man in good shape and I believe I am considered attractive. I had the good fortune to meet an amazing woman 2 and a half years ago through work. She is a waitress and she is 32 years old. I have made a point to keep in contact ...
A. 27 January 2016: I think she likes you, but that doesn't mean she wants to date you or be with you. You really DO NOT know her.
But I think you need to slow down, Romeo.... YOU are not yet fully divorced and thus have nothing to REALLY offer her.
Some people u... (read in full...)
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