Any advise on this relationship will be welcome.
Q. I met a woman online about 2 yrs ago where she had posted she was divorced but was actually still married and her husband left her and was seeking a divorce. I told her she needed to finish her divorce before we could date because I don’t date ...
A. 16 September 2017: Set your e-mail up to automatically put her e-mails in the spam folder. No point in even reading them, YOU owe her nothing.
She will probably continue with this passive-aggressive attitude for a while so KEEP ignoring her. IF she shows up at your ... (read in full...)
How can I repair the damage done to our friendship?
Q. Hello folks. Just looking for advice. About 2-3months ago I meet a younger guy. I'm 33 he's 24. We met at work. I was between jobs and looking to earn while I looked for something else so found a part time job where I met, I'll call him Tom. I wo...
A. 16 September 2017: Yep, the best thing you can do is learn from it.
And never involve other people like that again. Who knows what kind of agenda Mary had/has.... Or how she articulated the "hearsay".
Shit happens and we move on.
If he got THIS dramatic over i... (read in full...)
I moved to be nearer to her, now she has broken up with me.
Q. I'm fifty years old and moved over a year ago to be near my girlfriend she is 48 and I thought she was the love of my life. Suddenly she started saying she was busy all of the time and tired So I havnt seen her in two weeks. Tonight she broke up ...
A. 12 September 2017: Your ex-GF has chosen this toxic room mate over you. Why? Who knows maybe she likes the implications that the room mate "NEEDS" her more. She gets to "save" the room mate from herself. Even though she is actually enabling a pretty destructive ... (read in full...)
Why do many lesbian relationships end by going on the rebound?
Q. I've got a general question about relationships and wonder if anyone else can relate to what I'm going through. I am a 33 year old lesbian. I've dated women since I was 18, but one thing I have never understood about women, particularly lesbians, is ...
A. 12 September 2017: I think it our of fear. Fear of being alone.
I don't think it's just lesbians who do this, as I have seen it some with gay men and straight people too.
What it comes down to is finding a person who has the same standards and values as yours.... (read in full...)
I moved to be nearer to her, now she has broken up with me.
Q. I'm fifty years old and moved over a year ago to be near my girlfriend she is 48 and I thought she was the love of my life. Suddenly she started saying she was busy all of the time and tired So I havnt seen her in two weeks. Tonight she broke up ...
A. 12 September 2017: Have you ever done a background check on her? It seems weird that someone who is a friend, co-worker and room mate would attempt suicide if there wasn't more going on...
Sounds more like they were/are an item as well.... (read in full...)
I moved to be nearer to her, now she has broken up with me.
Q. I'm fifty years old and moved over a year ago to be near my girlfriend she is 48 and I thought she was the love of my life. Suddenly she started saying she was busy all of the time and tired So I havnt seen her in two weeks. Tonight she broke up ...
A. 12 September 2017: Sounds like she wanted you to rescue her from this room mate situation in her mind but not in reality.
Some people have some rather dysfunctional friendships and relationships - sounds like the one she has with her room mate is one. BUT she gets... (read in full...)
I like girl A but am dating girl B
Q. I became really good friends with these two girls who are best friends. I liked them both but had a crush on girl lets say girl A. I never told girl A this. We had different styles and the few convos we did have she always talked about dating this ...
A. 11 September 2017: LOL @ YouWish!
... (read in full...)
Heartbroken even though I dumped him and now I want him to chase me and get me back
Q. I need your help folks. I was seeing a guy who was coming out of a marriage. He was single for about 8 months and we started seeing each other. Both of us knew each other locally and we were both surprised when we got to know each other and ...
A. 11 September 2017: I agree with WiseOwlE and his manly perspective :)
You are expecting too much. More than he is willing and probably able to give.
He needs to be in a place in his life where things have calmed down. After the divorce where he, his ex-wife and ... (read in full...)
I like girl A but am dating girl B
Q. I became really good friends with these two girls who are best friends. I liked them both but had a crush on girl lets say girl A. I never told girl A this. We had different styles and the few convos we did have she always talked about dating this ...
A. 11 September 2017: I think you made quite a few mistakes here,
1. you settled for B when you really wanted A. Not fair on B.
2. You treated B like garbage because she wasn't A. Again, not fair on B.
3. You feel sorry for B but haven't ended it. Making her bel... (read in full...)
I think I'd be better off just blocking him from my life
Q. I was recently away on a holiday with a load of other people. I am gay and everyone knows this and am 38 yrs old. Whilst we were away a younger 23 yr old was being friendly with me and then hinted he wanted to come up to chat in my room. Anyhow ...
A. 11 September 2017: You got used. the guy wanted to "walk on the wild side" but he doesn't want a gay lifestyle or BF. Sort of like the "almost" straight people in college who "experiment" with their limits and sexuality.
You should have turned him down from the get ... (read in full...)
I don't want sex to become a duty!
Q. I have polycystic ovary syndrome. If often means my hormones are all over the place. Sometimes I want sex and sometimes I really don't want sex. But my long term boyfriend naturally has a higher sex drive than me and seems to take it really ...
A. 11 September 2017: Talk to him?
It really IS the best way to go about it. Sexy shouldn't become a chore or a "duty". No one OWES sex to their partner.
While it is normal that sex can become a bit routine over the years, it's really up to the COUPLE to find w... (read in full...)
I moved to be nearer to her, now she has broken up with me.
Q. I'm fifty years old and moved over a year ago to be near my girlfriend she is 48 and I thought she was the love of my life. Suddenly she started saying she was busy all of the time and tired So I havnt seen her in two weeks. Tonight she broke up ...
A. 11 September 2017: Were you moving part of a "plan" to be together? Was it discussed or did you make that choice alone?
I ask because it seems to me (and you perhaps) that the logical step in an LDR is one party or both move closer to the other in order to make the... (read in full...)
Are we dating or are we friends? Long distance friendship with my ex.
Q. Dear cupid, my boyfriend and I have had a 'thing' or more like dated for just over a year. He has moved away from home to go to boarding school and we made the decision that we would stop dating once he left, we also had decided that we were going ...
A. 10 September 2017: I think you would BOTH be better off if you moved on.
It sounds like he wants you to be in a holding position for when he visits and that is kind of selfish of him. He makes you feel like you are walking on eggshells in case you upset him by livin... (read in full...)
I'm in a relationship yet I find myself attracted to a friend. What to do?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for about a year now and I love him to death and I can't imagine life without him. When I was living overseas for some time, my elder brother had some room mates and every time we came back to see the house, I obviousl...
A. 10 September 2017: Being in a relationship doesn't mean you become immune to other men's charms or go blind to other attractive males.
We STILL notice other people.
It's normal.
What does complicate things are the CHOICES we make when we DO catch those feelin... (read in full...)
I had a friend check on what he told me and he cut ties with me. Did I do something wrong?
Q. I met a guy online 4 months ago. All along he has been telling me about the particular company he works for and has talked about work at great length because he works really long hours. I have a friend who works for the same company. I told her ...
A. 10 September 2017: While I'm ACTUALLY all for checking up on a new love interest, it needs to be done with discretion and RESPECT for the person you are looking up.
Ther e might have been WAY better ways to SEE if he was working where he said he was working rather t... (read in full...)
My crush is being weird!
Q. last week I ended pulling a gorgeous female while I was out with my friends, and we seem to have a lot in common with each other, she always liked me at school, but for some reason we didn't end up getting together, now we are, she sent me a friend ...
A. 10 September 2017: Sounds like she has a BF...
Honestly...? I'd unfriend her and move on. You are wasting your time on someone who wants "friends" or "likes" on Facebook, not an actual friend or more.
Her asking you not to message you on Facebook pretty much spel... (read in full...)
I 'almost' had a relationship, what's going on, s he being cautious?
Q. I am very confused. An "almost relationship" probably best describes what we were. We were close friends prior to any feelings developing. We were not physically intimate, there was a lot of cuddling and closeness when he invited me over. But he ...
A. 10 September 2017: You aren't looking for him to be your friend. That much is obvious.
And secondly, when you got upset that he didn't want things to go in the direction YOU wanted it to go (relationship) you cut him off, instantly regretted it and got back in touch... (read in full...)
My mother always gives me such a hard time
Q. Have you ever felt heart ache ? well I have. The feeling of light pain and sour when you're really depressed,and I had one experience for my dying grandma, another one for myself. My mom is a very traditional woman.she always wants me to learn ever...
A. 10 September 2017: I have 3 teenage daughters (no sons) and they ALL have "domestic" chores. NOT because they are girls but because having chores is part of life. They are all old enough for me to not have to run around behind them and pick up after them. They do ... (read in full...)
The tale of two sisters
Q. The tale of two sisters; 1st issue Sister T and Sister J live 50 miles apart. Their father sadly passes away. Some months later Sister J phones Sister T and asks what they should do with Dad’s clothes. They agree that they should be cleared a...
A. 10 September 2017: Sister B can tell her sisters no or tell them to go fly a kite.
Some people treat family like crap because they know that the family member(s) usually suck it up or make excuses for them.
If Sister B is NOT happy with how her sisters treat th... (read in full...)
Now that he's abroad he doesn't contact me at all!
Q. Hi, I'm in a strange "relationship" with my colleague and I don't know what to do..One year ago I've got this new job..when i met with my coworker, it was instant chemistry, he always look at me, trying to contact me..but i heard he's a player s...
A. 9 September 2017: He might contact you when he isn't so busy getting acquainted with his new job, new home, and new co-workers.
I don't think it's that he JUST doesn't care about you (as a friend or otherwise) it's just that he has other things as his top priority... (read in full...)
How can I repair the damage done to our friendship?
Q. Hello folks. Just looking for advice. About 2-3months ago I meet a younger guy. I'm 33 he's 24. We met at work. I was between jobs and looking to earn while I looked for something else so found a part time job where I met, I'll call him Tom. I wo...
A. 9 September 2017: I agree with Auntie BimBim,
You screwed up. You are not a kid and having other people tell yet other people you like them is immature and a dumb move. Why? Because you have no control over HOW it's conveyed and WHAT is conveyed.
He made the c... (read in full...)
Any advise on this relationship will be welcome.
Q. I met a woman online about 2 yrs ago where she had posted she was divorced but was actually still married and her husband left her and was seeking a divorce. I told her she needed to finish her divorce before we could date because I don’t date ...
A. 9 September 2017: Good Lord, OP
She is NOT perfection. She is NOT a good match for you.
She is TOXIC! and you are HURTING not just yourself but your kids by keeping her around.
There IS a reason she has been married so many times and it hasn't worked out. Th... (read in full...)
He's the perfect boyfriend .... when his mate isn't around1
Q. Ive met this guy. he is amazing and sweet and just perfect in every way. HOWEVER.. he has this best friend who has very loose morals. when they are together they drink far too much and take drugs. when my boyfriend is not with him he never does dr...
A. 9 September 2017: Unfortunately, you can't dictate who he can be friends with, who he can hang out with and HOW to act when with certain people.
You say he is "perfect" when he is with you - I say he ACTS like a good BF with you because he wants a GF. He knows wh... (read in full...)
Now that he's abroad he doesn't contact me at all!
Q. Hi, I'm in a strange "relationship" with my colleague and I don't know what to do..One year ago I've got this new job..when i met with my coworker, it was instant chemistry, he always look at me, trying to contact me..but i heard he's a player s...
A. 8 September 2017: 1. He could be busy.
2. He isn't as into you as you are into him.
He might be one of "those" guys who "love them and leave them" (more like have sex and move on to next "target".) so while he was charming and flirty and pursuing you WHI... (read in full...)
I'm tired of being the other woman and need to break things off but how?
Q. I once met a guy that by just shaking hands with, I forgot my existence, I don't know why or how but before even knowing his name I felt something so strong inside me that made my legs weak. Anyways, I got to know him and you know the rest, I fell ...
A. 8 September 2017: You are young and quite naive.
It's not "pure love". But it helps YOU when you call it love instead of lust and betrayal. Nothing pure about cheaters.
He doesn't LOVE you. If he truly did he wouldn't stay with the wife and "keep" you in a ... (read in full...)
Why did it hurt so much seeing him with another girl if we are just friends and I don't have feelings for him?
Q. Why did it hurt so much seeing him with another girl if we are just friends and I don't have feelings for him? I'm talking about my guy friend. I don't know if friend is the right word, we've known eachother forward nearly two years and always...
A. 8 September 2017: I think the reason it hurts, is that you have feelings for him. Doesn't mean you want him to be your BF but you DO care.
Whether the other girl is a GF or a G-friend doesn't really matter, in the sense that you might have felt YOU were the "spe... (read in full...)
If he's not doing anything with his ex then why did he get so mad and ignore me?
Q. Hello I would like to get your opinions on this: I've noticed how ironic it has been in the past 6 months how every time my BF's ex is online (Her Facebook shows she is online), he is also showing online but is unavailable to take my calls. I've bee...
A. 8 September 2017: Jeeez, OP are you his parole officer?!
If you are SO sure he is doing all this SHIT behind your back WHY are you with him?
It's ridiculous! What's next? A GPS tracker on his phone? A drone to fly over his head so you can watch him when you are... (read in full...)
How should this family go about dividing my late Grandmother's jewelry?
Q. My family is dividing my grandmother's jewelery this weekend. The divide is between my mother (daughter), my cousin (granddaughter), me (granddaughter), and my cousin's 15 year old (great-granddaughter). My mom insists that my grandmother told her ...
A. 7 September 2017: Oh, I hate when people get greedy with stuff that ISN'T theirs (yet). I have seen it a few times in my own family and it disgusts me.
Honestly, I'd suggest you grandfather finds a NEUTRAL 3rd person (maybe an appraiser, if the jewelry is worth a ... (read in full...)
What's with the condoms? Is he lying to me?
Q. Hello, My fiancé and I been together for almost 6 years and about 2 years ago I've found a condom in his jacket pocket and I asked him about it and he told me it was from us from the beginning of us dating. And now I found another condom in his ...
A. 7 September 2017: Well, the Ladies gave you good explanations as to HOW to read the wrappers already so I won't go into that.
As for the condoms in the jacket - has he not USED that jacket since the beginning of you dating? To me, that sounds a bit far-fetc... (read in full...)
Advice please on handling these locals glaring at me!
Q. Hello, this might seem like a silly problem. I am 44 years old and while i can be fiery i have calmed down a lot as i have got older. When i was younger i was very different as a person, fiery and i thought nothing of having casual partners. I ha...
A. 6 September 2017: Learn to ignore them. What they think is irrelevant. And it's not like you can change how others SEE you when they don't know you. So the MORE you act like a crazy lady, the more people will presume you are one.
If you instead ACCEPT that not ever... (read in full...)
My co-worker is trying to paint me as a bully!
Q. Hi Agony Aunts and Uncles. I work with this girl who is trying to paint me as a Bully. We don't always see eye to eye. She says I pick on her when I have to tell her she is doing something wrong. I don't like being that person. Its because I have a...
A. 6 September 2017: You need to have a sit down with your boss. He should from now on be her DIRECT supervisor as she will not take guidance or corrections from you. If she listens to him, so be it.
OR your BOSS needs to sit her down and explain to her that YOUR job... (read in full...)
Am I just hoping for the best and not wanting to accept reality?
Q. Just in a new relationship and he's moved back home to the south of our country (about 200 miles from me). We decided to just see how things go and he definitely asked me to be his. However, he hardly calls. If he does, It has to be before ...
A. 6 September 2017: Honestly? I call bullshit on his excuse.
Does he live in a one room house with his parents? If not why can't he talk when they are home? And why not tell people about this AMAZING girl he met up North?
The fact that he puts in MINIMUM effort y... (read in full...)
She suggested a holiday but then didn't raise the topic. She finally said it was too expensive, is this a sign of problems ahead?
Q. My girlfriend suggested we go away a few months ago on a specific date. Since then, shes never raised it - but I have on numerous occasions, offering to book things, asking if she was still interested, or even not wanting to go, and all the time she ...
A. 6 September 2017: I do think it is an issue. It might be fixable though. And that has to happen through communication.
My guess is that she was waiting for you to OFFER to pay. And when that didn't happen and you kept bringing up holidays she shot it down with an ... (read in full...)
Should I be honest about kissing my friend, or leave it in the past?
Q. I can't tell if I'm over reacting about this situation and I'd really appreciate some insight. Here's a bit of a back story... Late '16, early '17 I met this guy and we really liked one another to the point where we started developing a sem...
A. 6 September 2017: Just leave it in the past, there is REALLY no point in telling.
As far as your CURRENT BF is concerned you told you kissed someone and he told you he hooked up with someone as well - that you two weren't an item so all is good.
The guy you m... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has just confessed that he slept with someone else
Q. I'm after some advice, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. I have never doubted our trust or believe he has ever done anything to jeopardise our relationship. Well that's what I thought until this Wednesday he called me down the...
A. 6 September 2017: I agree with CAA,
While it might be out of character for him to cheat, something is going on in his head that he MADE that choice. It's wasn't an "accident". He didn't stumble, fall and his dick just happened to land in some "strange" girl's v... (read in full...)
How to get off on the right foot with his parents?
Q. Hello! I hope you're doing well today. I met someone new and so did his sibling. He is 30, sibling is 28. It's been on 4 occasions that their parents cater to the sibling's new paramour in my opinion. They initiate conversation with them more than ...
A. 5 September 2017: Relax.
You make getting to know your partner's parents into a competition between you and the siblings new partner. It's not. Some people converse easily with new people, others don't.
So don't try and be someone you are not.
I would avoid b... (read in full...)
I think my boyfriend is going a bit too far
Q. I'm 15 and my boyfriend is 15 too We been together for almost 6 month but sometimes when we just kissing and stuff he grabs my butt and stuff but in the beginning I would always take his hands away from my butt but know I kind of got use to it and s...
A. 5 September 2017: I agree with the two other posters, OP
YOU need to learn how to set boundaries. That means saying no to think you don't want to do. (and I'm not talking about saying no to your mother when she tells you to clean your room... OK?).
If you feel l... (read in full...)
How do I explain my decision to skip the reunion without bad mouthing the Dean?
Q. When I was in high school (a Catholic school), the Dean of Men was one of the worst people I ever known. He played favorites (if you were one of his favorites, you would never be in trouble no matter what you did but if you were not his favorite, ...
A. 5 September 2017: I'd just say you have other plans for that day and unfortunately can't make it.
It's YOUR prerogative to go or not go.
Personally, if there are MORE people you want to see than just this ONE man you don't - then I'd go and avoid the ONE pe... (read in full...)
My girlfriend broke up with me but now wants back
Q. My girlfriend broke up with me a few weeks back but couldn't give me a reason for wanting out. We have been in a gay relationship together for 5 years with many ups and downs and this was just another time of her saying she didn't want the relation...
A. 5 September 2017: It didn't work out. then you had a sort of FWB thing after, and while that was ongoing SHE was looking for someone "better" (not saying you aren't good enough - just that SHE thinks she can do better, otherwise she wouldn't be looking at other women ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's mother is a bully
Q. At my bf’s family get-togethers, my bf’s mother would rudely tell her husband Tom to shut up if one or two words came out of his mouth. Tom is her 2nd husband and not the father of her children. I was aghast at her treatment of Tom. I think I am the ...
A. 5 September 2017: I think Tom is a grown man who needs to stand up for himself, that isn't your job.
You gave him a chance to do so in a way where he KNEW you had his back and he still rather suck it up. HIS choice.
NOW if she pulls that crap with you! Then y... (read in full...)
What does my boyfriend mean by all his confusing statements?
Q. Hello Aunts and Uncles!!! So I'm in a bind. A month ago my bf and I had a huge disagreement with one another. We did not talk sometime after. About a week ago he contacts me apologizing and giving me confusing signs. First he says I want to be with ...
A. 5 September 2017: There you go.
No point in waiting for someone to "grow" up or decide what they want.
My advice though, OP - cut the contact 100%. Otherwise, he will pop in and out of your life to see if he is "ready" or not - which means he will hold you ba... (read in full...)
How do I materialise this online association?
Q. I have been using online dating and started talking to this guy 3 months ago. We quite quickly got to messaging each other everyday. He has a really busy job and when I kept suggesting meeting up he would say he is working late so can't meet and at ...
A. 4 September 2017: I agree if he REALLY liked you he would make a bigger effort to spend time with you and get to know you.
I would just tell him that you wish him well and that you had hoped more would have come of the meeting each other but that you respect ... (read in full...)
What does my boyfriend mean by all his confusing statements?
Q. Hello Aunts and Uncles!!! So I'm in a bind. A month ago my bf and I had a huge disagreement with one another. We did not talk sometime after. About a week ago he contacts me apologizing and giving me confusing signs. First he says I want to be with ...
A. 3 September 2017: That he wants to keep you around "just in case" he doesn't find "better".
Honey, if you two get into a disagreement so severe that you can't TALK about it but just take time outs of not talking then HOW do you think things will pan out NEXT tim... (read in full...)
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