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This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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My boyfriend masturbates next to me in bed and wakes me up, and gets defensive when I ask him to stop...
Q. I have been with my current boyfriend for a little over one year. We are very much in love, and have a great sex life, but once in a while have a good argument about eachother's peeves. One that I am CONSTANTLY arguing with him about is the fact ...
A. 18 July 2010: Anti, there is a time and place for revenge, and when a woman on numerous occasions has been placed on the very edge of what is tolerable... bad things will happen. Beware men. Bad things will happen. They don't call it "beauty sleep" for nothing ... (read in full...)
Is sex between siblings bad?
Q. i would like to know if sex between siblings, is bad or actually a taboo? and why? is it just because of society norms? is it because we have been born and educated with the thought that it is bad, even though we have experimented when we were kids? ...
A. 16 July 2010: I disagree, I bet many people will not be attracted to their siblings. I think people who are attracted to their siblings are in a minority. My personal point of view is that, well if both of the siblings want to have a relationship and they ... (read in full...)
Do I have to make my career choice already at 15?
Q. hi, im 15 and i've been told i have 5 months to decide what i want to do and i have to apply for college in 5 months. im not sure what i want to do i wanted to be a police woman and make a change because i really do care but im not very healty( ...
A. 14 July 2010: It is nice to have made up your mind at an early age, because then you have a goal to work towards. Some educations take many many years. And then again, some careers aren't profitable (or at least not the first years), and are only fit for the ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend commented badly on the nude picture I sent him!
Q. Im in a long distance relationship and in a committed relationship of one year.well i really love my bf and even he loves me a lot.the problem is that he told me to send some nude pics..well i don't have any problem because we are close and i have ...
A. 14 July 2010: Could it be that he was saying that because he thought it would be sexier and wanted to see more pictures to his pleasing?
What does he do in return for you? ... (read in full...)
Did you ever love someone you couldn't have?
Q. This isn't really for advice, more for opinions. Is there anyone whose ever loved someone before or had feelings for someone, but there was sort of an obstacle to get to that person? Did you ever get to them? Was it worth it to risk the things y...
A. 14 July 2010: I think many people experience this. When I was 14 I was deeply in love with a boy who was 18. The age was too great of an obstacle + he barely knew I existed. I never even gave it a shot, and after two years we didn't talk anymore and never hung in ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and his female friend used to be FWB!
Q. My boyfriend of a few months has a female best friend, Sally (pseudonym), that he used to hook up with intermittently but never formally dated. Sally moved to a different state for school and he ended up following her out here a year ago to find a ...
A. 14 July 2010: You need to trust your man. Having a friendship with someone you've had a sexual relationship with does NOT invite to cheating anymore than any friendship invites to cheating. If your man is is loyal and trustworthy then there is no problem other ... (read in full...)
I found a picture of a girl in her underwear on his phone...
Q. I have recently found in my bf's phone that he has a pic of a girl in her underwear and she is one of his contacts. seeing this really hurt me and i can't seem to get it out of my head. i checked the details and it was received a month ago and by ...
A. 13 July 2010: How long have you two been together? If this is a very new relationship it could be he is not used to following the "rules" of a relationship, but that the hint gave him the kick he needed to improve. People make mistakes and do things they ... (read in full...)
Do girlfriends discuss their lovers in detail?
Q. Another post had me wondering... when you girls talk about your BF's to fairly close or very close friends, what is the limit on discussion? Do you just say things like "he's great in bed" "he's very tender", or do most women go into more detail ...
A. 13 July 2010: Yes, with very close friends I have discussed penises. If I am currently in the relationship with someone and there is anything that might be awkward, I don't mention too many details. But the average is size, girth, shape and capabilities in bed. ... (read in full...)
I feel I want more than snogging but I'm not totally sure what I want to do!
Q. I've been going out with this guy for 3 and a half months, he is the first boy I've kissed and the furthest we've gone is snogging, we're both 14 but I feel like I want more and im not sure what I want and what to do. If you could help i wou...
A. 13 July 2010: If you feel you want more, but not sure what, maybe there is something lacking in the relationship? Like maybe you feel he doesn't give you everything you need out of a relationship? Try to think about what you need and what feels right for you, and ... (read in full...)
He doesn't seem to like anything I give him, should I talk to him about it?
Q. Every present I give to my boyfriend ends up unused in a drawer, and it's really starting to bother me. I wondered if I was just getting presents he didn't really like, so this year for his birthday I got him something I knew he wanted because h...
A. 13 July 2010: Yepp. Tell him how you feel. Or better yet, ask him why he puts the in the cupboard, if there is any reasonable excuse for it. Then follow with explaining how it makes you feel. He might just be aloof and unaware. ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with him? I feel like he's going nowhere fast.
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years, he is 30 and still lives at home with his mum he doesn't pay rent, clean up after himself and to be quite honest I'm sick and tired of it. I love him, but I feel like love is not enough anymore. All my ...
A. 13 July 2010: If he doesn't match with what you need, you should do yourself and him a favour and leave. What he does doesn't have to be bad or horrible or anything. He could be spending meaningful time to science for all I know. But the point is: it doesn't ... (read in full...)
In a relationship but I don't feel we see each other enough...
Q. hey every1! me and my bf have been going out for more than 3 years and we're both 20(im a month older. He works at least 4 days a week so we only ever end up seeing each other once a week and we text for like 2 hours a day. I feel like this isnt g...
A. 13 July 2010: Try to work out a deal with him on when you meet, like a set plan. This and that day around that time you will always meet? As it is now, by the sounds of it, you are/place yourself at the bottom of things to prioritize. First work, then work for ... (read in full...)
A question of condoms...
Q. hey i had a question and i was hoping you could help if a guy has a condom on and it doesnt break could she still get pregnant. ...
A. 13 July 2010: Hmm Cindy, I am sure I will not get pregnant as I am not even having sex at the moment ;) The most effective birth control there is, I highly recommend it.
This is what I usually say/think about sex and pregnancy. If you are not ready to have chi... (read in full...)
Do other people know if someone has had sex the night before?
Q. I don't want to disgust anyone with this question, but I want to know what goes on inside other people's heads. My question is...Do people wonder if they see someone walking down the street whether or not that person had sex the night before? ...
A. 13 July 2010: Women do talk. So be careful who you mess around with, you might want to stick to those you know you can trust to keep it private. Second, no there is no way people can tell if you had sex the night before, or even at all, just by looking at you. ... (read in full...)
Is sex between siblings bad?
Q. i would like to know if sex between siblings, is bad or actually a taboo? and why? is it just because of society norms? is it because we have been born and educated with the thought that it is bad, even though we have experimented when we were kids? ...
A. 13 July 2010: Siblings are not allowed to have sex/get married and have children because the children of siblings have a much higher chance of being born with defects and not capable of living. Sex between family members is called incest, and you might want to ... (read in full...)
Can alcohol and headache tablets stop the pill from working?
Q. Hi:) 2 nights ago i had sex with my boyfriend,I`m on the pill but i drank alcohol that night and i took 2 panadol tablets for a headache before we had sex,we didnt use a condom or anythin. Im worried that the alcohol and tablets would have a...
A. 13 July 2010: No, alcohol and pain killers do not affect the birth-control pill. However antibiotics weaken the pills effect. These things will be listed up on the leaflet that comes with your pills. ... (read in full...)
I found a picture of a girl in her underwear on his phone...
Q. I have recently found in my bf's phone that he has a pic of a girl in her underwear and she is one of his contacts. seeing this really hurt me and i can't seem to get it out of my head. i checked the details and it was received a month ago and by ...
A. 13 July 2010: "If he get's mad that you are upset about the picture and he turn this around on you that you shouldn't have looked at his phone...you have your answer. He sees nothing wrong with his behavior, he is unempathetic to you being upset over the half ... (read in full...)
He refuses to come inside of me!
Q. BF of 3 yrs cannot/will not come inside of me even though pregnancy is not possible. I have also suggested he use a condom if that would make him more comfortable with the idea. He doesn't seem interested in increasing our intimacy this way. We are ...
A. 13 July 2010: Yes, he is being selfish. He likes it better when he comes in your mouth, but that is a less intimate act. It is fine, by all means, but not all of the time when you prefer it otherwise. That just isn't fair. You are two people who shall achieve ... (read in full...)
Is this some sort of psychological block I'm experiencing with her?
Q. So, I'm a 25 year old male virgin. I know, as sad as that sounds, I was overweight for most of my life and have recently lost a lot of weight and have begun experiencing the confidence boost and attention from females that comes with it. Anyw...
A. 13 July 2010: Maybe you need more intimacy and confidence. You don't describe her as your girlfriend, and maybe your body is telling you that this is not what you want, that you want a proper relationship? Or it is presentation anxiety, that many men experience ... (read in full...)
What should I do to get over him?
Q. My ex and I broke up awhile ago BUT I still have to see him all the time. And no I'm not just "accidentally" running into him. My best friend(she's the mary kate to my ashley)'s boyfriend is one of his best friends so every time we go out, I always ...
A. 13 July 2010: Any excuse to break up is legit. It just means he wants out of the relationship. However, there are no good excuses to flirt with your ex while you are drunk and make her miserable, only to continue being broken up when he gets sober. You are right, ... (read in full...)
He refuses to come inside of me!
Q. BF of 3 yrs cannot/will not come inside of me even though pregnancy is not possible. I have also suggested he use a condom if that would make him more comfortable with the idea. He doesn't seem interested in increasing our intimacy this way. We are ...
A. 13 July 2010: Yes, I think we need to know more about his reasons for not coming inside of you. Some men do this to avoid pregnancy, but for them it is more of a subconscious act really, as everyone knows the pull-out method does not work anything near as great ... (read in full...)
A question of condoms...
Q. hey i had a question and i was hoping you could help if a guy has a condom on and it doesnt break could she still get pregnant. ...
A. 13 July 2010: Thank you for the extra information Cindy. I've updated my knowledge about condoms now. But what about the birth-control pill? That one I have heard is 100% when used correctly, meaning both a condom and a birth control would be unnecessary unless ... (read in full...)
Why this coldness all of a sudden? Is she going off me?
Q. Okay so recently my girlfriend has stopped saying I love you and hardly saying any cute.. like not making an effort you know? I mean I just check some text from 5 days ago and it's filled with: I love you's, forever, can't wait, wanna c u again. ...
A. 13 July 2010: One more tip: this isn't about women as a whole, but about what your girl is like. She is the one who doesn't like talking about her family business. She is the one who has gone luke warm lately. This is about you learning to know your girl. Not ... (read in full...)
I'm losing hope for this relationship everyday!
Q. Hi, me and my boyfriend met 15 months ago online when he was in iraq. After a month of talking (i know it was early) but we declared we were in a relationship. He was due to fly home in another 3 months so we were gunna meet when he returned. Two ...
A. 12 July 2010: I am sorry, but you should end your relationship with him. He is not taking your relationship seriously, and that is a lame excuse he comes with when he says he "hadn't met you yet". You were in an official relationship! He clearly thinks being long ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend masturbates next to me in bed and wakes me up, and gets defensive when I ask him to stop...
Q. I have been with my current boyfriend for a little over one year. We are very much in love, and have a great sex life, but once in a while have a good argument about eachother's peeves. One that I am CONSTANTLY arguing with him about is the fact ...
A. 12 July 2010: That is inconsiderate. He needs to respect that you need sleep, and if he needs to masturbate to sleep he should do it before he goes to bed. Really, maybe he should take sleeping pills? I don't think he gets what the problem really is.
"It w... (read in full...)
Why this coldness all of a sudden? Is she going off me?
Q. Okay so recently my girlfriend has stopped saying I love you and hardly saying any cute.. like not making an effort you know? I mean I just check some text from 5 days ago and it's filled with: I love you's, forever, can't wait, wanna c u again. ...
A. 12 July 2010: I think you are over-reacting. It's been 5 days. So unless you have only been together two weeks (which would be too son to say "I love you"), 5 days is nothing. Give her the space she needs and show her that your arms are open when she is ready to ... (read in full...)
I can't orgasm, are we having to much sex?
Q. My boyfriend and I cant stop touching each other! lol We kiss and immediatly, sparks go off. He holds my hand, sparks. He smiles at me, sparks. We laugh together-sparks! He is my first. I always want him! He loves my stamina and sometimes, he'll ...
A. 12 July 2010: No, it is not because of too much sex. How are your trying to get an orgasm when you have sex? Is it always you in control or does he ever go down on you? Getting and orgasm with a partner takes time and practice. ... (read in full...)
Healthier eating???
Q. First of all, this isn't really a relationship question, but i do need help. Anyway, I've recently started living with my dad, who isn't married, and doesn't have a girlfriend. He also has NO IDEA how to cook, so he always eats out at places li...
A. 12 July 2010: One great thing to eat though, as a last suggestion: home made soups. They are also so easy to make. ... (read in full...)
Healthier eating???
Q. First of all, this isn't really a relationship question, but i do need help. Anyway, I've recently started living with my dad, who isn't married, and doesn't have a girlfriend. He also has NO IDEA how to cook, so he always eats out at places li...
A. 12 July 2010: There are tons of recipes to be bought at bookstores, or be found online. Read up on what are healthy ingredients and take it from there. Everything you need can be found at any larger grocery store. Maybe you could politely point out to your father ... (read in full...)
Opinions appreciated. Am I still a virgin... or not?
Q. hi so, im not sure if i lost my virginity, like his penis was in me but he was pretty thick and i was pretty tight and it was my first time so it was really sore, he pulled out though when i said i couldn't take it so does it mean im not a virgin? ...
A. 12 July 2010: I also count dildoes as penises. A small vibrator the size of a finger is not going to make a difference, but I believe girls/women are capable of taking their own virginity by using a dildo the size and shape of a penis. Just my personal opinion ... (read in full...)
Is it just his teenage hormones and should I tell my partner?
Q. hi all i have a bit of a bizarre problem, i just need some opinions on this. im 25 weeks pregnant and happily living with my partner. since i became pregnant, my partners 16 year old brother has been acting strange towards me. at first i...
A. 12 July 2010: What about leaving your partner out of it in round one and have a chat with the brother first? Tell him you don't like his behaviour towards you and want him to stop. Tell him you don't want him touching your belly. It is your body after all, not ... (read in full...)
A question of condoms...
Q. hey i had a question and i was hoping you could help if a guy has a condom on and it doesnt break could she still get pregnant. ...
A. 12 July 2010: I've never heard anything other than condoms protecting 100% IF used correctly. And as far as the 2% who do get pregnant after using a condom it is because of not correct use, or the condom being ripped. Where do you get the 85% from dirtball?
... (read in full...)
I found a picture of a girl in her underwear on his phone...
Q. I have recently found in my bf's phone that he has a pic of a girl in her underwear and she is one of his contacts. seeing this really hurt me and i can't seem to get it out of my head. i checked the details and it was received a month ago and by ...
A. 12 July 2010: Has he ever told you to never look at his phone? If he left it around and you have an open and honest relationship, you checking out pics on his phone shouldn't be an issue. I don't condone snooping, but I could see myself checking out my bf's phone ... (read in full...)
In a relationship but I don't feel we see each other enough...
Q. hey every1! me and my bf have been going out for more than 3 years and we're both 20(im a month older. He works at least 4 days a week so we only ever end up seeing each other once a week and we text for like 2 hours a day. I feel like this isnt g...
A. 12 July 2010: Perhaps try calling each other after he is done at work? Why is it you can't see him on the days he works? Unless he works 12 hour shifts I don't see why you can't meet up after work? But, you meet basically half of every week. That is not little. ... (read in full...)
Opinions appreciated. Am I still a virgin... or not?
Q. hi so, im not sure if i lost my virginity, like his penis was in me but he was pretty thick and i was pretty tight and it was my first time so it was really sore, he pulled out though when i said i couldn't take it so does it mean im not a virgin? ...
A. 12 July 2010: You are not a virgin. You had a penis in you. But, that doesn't mean it won't hurt the next time as well. I've had thick ones and they still hurt even when Im no virgin. ... (read in full...)
I'm worried my dad's friend is attracted to me......
Q. Here it is. My dad(45 yrs old) has this friend who's only a year younger than him. They've been friends as long as I can remember, plus they work together and we go to the same church. With him being so close to my dad, we've developed a really ...
A. 12 July 2010: I think that is more than enough information. Whether or not this man is actually seriously interested in you doesn't matter, because his physical contact with you has crossed the line. He should not ask you to sit on his lap, that is actually ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is looking at videos of him and his ex having sex
Q. If my boyfriend is looking at videos of him and his ex having sex should I confront him or leave? ...
A. 12 July 2010: Confront him and give him a piece of your mind, and then leave. ... (read in full...)
Crying after masturbation?
Q. Hey, well im a virgen but i do masterbate and when ever im almost done or am done i feel like i wanna cry and some times i do. I like get really sad out of no where is that normal? Il be thinking of my boyfreind and stuff then when im done doing it ...
A. 11 July 2010: It could be a phase. That the orgasm, or the feelings, are so intense that you get overwhelmed. Maybe in time you will learn how to control it, or that it will pass.
I don't think you should worry so much. Of course it is sad that you get sad,... (read in full...)
Why does my boyfriend take pictures with other women and hides them from me?
Q. I just moved in permanetly with my fiance and one day my fiance was showing me some photos he had in his phone, but wouldnt let me hold his phone, so i insisted and basically fought him for it n took his phone away from him and discovered that he ...
A. 11 July 2010: Hun, you will find someone who treats you better! This man is not treating you good at all, so he is nice to you, but he also takes pictures with other girls, like some type of trophy. I fear that this will, or already has, lead to cheating. He is ... (read in full...)
Is he secretly holding a grudge, or is he really over what I've done?
Q. I have been with my partner for three years now, and in that time he has been perfect. He is loyal, respectful, loving and kind. However, I myself havent not been an angel. Although I didn't do anything obviously wrong I have sometimes crossed the ...
A. 11 July 2010: If I was you there is no way I would accept to be bossed around like you are being. You can't talk to males on dearcupid? That is nonsense. If it was a dating website I could understand, but not just an online network like this. And you are not ... (read in full...)
Is he secretly holding a grudge, or is he really over what I've done?
Q. I have been with my partner for three years now, and in that time he has been perfect. He is loyal, respectful, loving and kind. However, I myself havent not been an angel. Although I didn't do anything obviously wrong I have sometimes crossed the ...
A. 10 July 2010: Some are able to forgive and forget. ... (read in full...)
What can I expect to happen when I lose my virginity?
Q. what are the signs one sees when she looses her virginity?...
A. 10 July 2010: Signs? You don't see a sign, you see (quite bluntly) a penis in you. Then often it hurts because you are not used to having something that big up there, and some women bleed. ... (read in full...)
Hot, heavy, and HPV!
Q. I'm concerned! I met a man and we hit it off great. Lots of sexual energy. He has Genital warts on his penis but no where else. We've made out very intensely including oral on me. My question is, Can I catch the HPV virus by him putting his mouth on ...
A. 10 July 2010: Untreated HPV does not cause cancer. If you have the virus that causes genital warts you get genital warts. They do not evolve to cancer. However there is a HPV virus that does cause cancer in some women. This virus is sadly very normal and almost ... (read in full...)
Hot, heavy, and HPV!
Q. I'm concerned! I met a man and we hit it off great. Lots of sexual energy. He has Genital warts on his penis but no where else. We've made out very intensely including oral on me. My question is, Can I catch the HPV virus by him putting his mouth on ...
A. 10 July 2010: Genital warts can be treated. Don't have any type of sex with him until they are gone, I say. The man needs to take some responsibility. Yes, you need to wash your hands well! And he needs to wash his. But I do not think gential warts spread from ... (read in full...)
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These are mutual friends, so *higirl has
added them and they have added *higirl!
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