| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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How do I get guys to look at me as more than just a one night stand?
Q. Okay so I'm a 18 years old girl, I consider myself as a okay looking girl but I do have a serious problem that just makes my self-esteem really low. I never had a boyfriend. Guys just aren't interested in me (except as a sexual object or something ...
A. 26 July 2010: For how long have you been looking for a serious relationship? These things can take time. Unless you want a quick hookup, you need to be patient and wait for the right guy. My guess is that at 18, you have barely started exploring the dating world. ... (read in full...)
If your not in love with somebody you're pregnant by, should you keep the baby?
Q. If your not in love with somebody you're pregnant by, should you keep the baby? ...
A. 26 July 2010: You can still go to school and become a veterinarian. You might get delayed in yoru education, but if you have the willpower a child is not in the way of getting an education. Especially not if you have good helpful people around you who can help ... (read in full...)
If your not in love with somebody you're pregnant by, should you keep the baby?
Q. If your not in love with somebody you're pregnant by, should you keep the baby? ...
A. 25 July 2010: Yeah, I guess it is like others have said here: you might dislike the father, but you will love your baby. Your baby is not the father. It is it's own being. ... (read in full...)
Why is she so shy about showing physical affection? Our 6-month relationship is in trouble.
Q. My girlfriend of 6 months is everything to me. We quickly fell in love and never looked back and i couldn't be happier. This is until a slight problem i thought was cute at first turned into a real annoyance. You see when we first got together she ...
A. 25 July 2010: She probably needs more time to mature and get used to the idea of having a boyfriend. If she is not ready to kiss you even after 6 months, then you are right, something is not right. I fear she might not be ready for a relationship. You need to ... (read in full...)
If your not in love with somebody you're pregnant by, should you keep the baby?
Q. If your not in love with somebody you're pregnant by, should you keep the baby? ...
A. 25 July 2010: In all honesty.. a baby is a life of it's own, and not a creation of peoples feelings for each other. If they love each other or not, a child is made. So why should their feelings for each other have a say in anything?
The question is: are you ... (read in full...)
I only seem able to have an orgasm in one position. Why is this?
Q. Hi, Can you please tell me why, when i have sex with my husband i feel excited when i face him and my clitoris touchs his penis? If we do different styles eg: a dog style he will be behind me but i cant orgasm, i cant end my excitement in any othe...
A. 25 July 2010: Most women come from clitoral stimulation. Nothing is wrong with you. If you can only come in one position then you are NORMAL. It is perfectly fine. You are lucky if you can come from all positions, because most women can not. If you think that ... (read in full...)
Is it possible not to like sex?
Q. Is it possible not to like sex? I lost my virginity to my boyfriend a few months ago and we've done it somewhere between 10-20 times but I still don't like it. Sometimes it hurts a little but at other times it's just uncomfortable or I can't feel ...
A. 25 July 2010: I guess it can happen, but in general it takes time to work things out and get them right. My bet now isn't that you don't like sex. No, my bet is on both of you being inexperienced in bed... in other words you aren't good at it. No offense, but ... (read in full...)
Not sure if I want to get her pregnant, but the clock is ticking
Q. I'm in a real predicament. I am recently divorced, and have a new GF that I am in love with and plan on marrying if all continues to go well. Well, we are middle age (40), and she has never had children and really wants to. So do I, but I also ...
A. 25 July 2010: As for the HPV, what exactly do you mean she had? Almost everyone has HPV... it is sort of the most common virus when you become sexually active, and you probably even have it yourself. HPV comes in many different kinds though, some cause cancer, ... (read in full...)
Not sure if I want to get her pregnant, but the clock is ticking
Q. I'm in a real predicament. I am recently divorced, and have a new GF that I am in love with and plan on marrying if all continues to go well. Well, we are middle age (40), and she has never had children and really wants to. So do I, but I also ...
A. 25 July 2010: I think it is now or never. You might never get ready for a child with this woman. Then you will have to find another woman. At some point though you just need to dive into the great unknown and let it happen. If you don't want to be old parents ... (read in full...)
My period is late, could I possibly be pregnant?
Q. i had sex on the 10th of july and i dont use contreception with my fiance...we use withdrawel method, wen he pulled out he didnt do it quick enough and caught just of the inside of my vagina and the rest on my clitoris and groin...i was due on my ...
A. 25 July 2010: Explore others means of contracetives, even if you are allergic to latex there are condoms made out of other things (can't remember the name at the moment) so if you don't wamt to be pregnant, but want sex, take responsibility and find a ... (read in full...)
I'm 16 but she thinks I'm older. What do I do?
Q. hi everyone I met this girl and we really like eachother but im 16 male and she is about to turn 20 so i mean she does not know im 16 either she thinks im 19 like her please i need a soultion besides leaveing her....
A. 23 July 2010: Besides leaving her? Get a fake passport, fake driving license, possibly a new birth certificate, and continue on the charade for ever. Can you do that? I think not. You would also be put to jail if it was found out that you have all these fake ... (read in full...)
Checking out other women has nearly destroyed our relationship
Q. Hi everyone, Okay, here's my problem: In the early stages of our relationship, my girlfriend and I were crazy about each other and our sex-life was amazing. Unfortunately, according to her, I also checked out women when we were out, looked at b...
A. 23 July 2010: Take her out on a vacation where there will be NO women around (like maybe rent a cabin somewhere) and then shower her in attention and affection. Maybe that will give her the intense treatment she needs to get over her insecurities and be happy ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to get this wet?
Q. i get really wet and i wont even be in a sexual situation!!! (i mean wet to the point it drips down my leg) is this normal?...
A. 23 July 2010: This does not sound normal. Get an appointment with your doctor/gynecologist and ask. ... (read in full...)
Is this forgivable and would you forgive?
Q. I just got out of counselling over an issue that I am having a very hard time forgiving myself for. I want to see if what I did would be forgiven, generally, particularly with an explaination and proper apology. In breif, I made an akward move on ...
A. 23 July 2010: If I would forgive a drunk man for feeling me up at a bar? Not in particular forgive as not bother with it. It happens, and you are not the first, and will not be the last man to do this. Do women enjoy it? No. Do we cry ourselves to sleep over it? ... (read in full...)
Has anyone ever felt excited, depressed, exhilarated lustful and guilty all at the same time?
Q. Ok I'm in a bit of a twisted wicked little game here, and I'm completely to blame so I will accept any abuse. I just need to get this off my chest because it's driving me insane! i'm 20 by the way, you do the maths! Ok here it goes... I have a ...
A. 23 July 2010: Hello. I'm going to give you a girl to girl talk, from the heart. No judging, but a bunch of life experience and solid know-how. But I am about to burst your bubble.
If you were single, this would have been great! Or..? I wonder, would you have... (read in full...)
Will sex hurt as much as using a tampon?
Q. i'm a 14 year old girl. i have a boyfriend, we've been dating for a long time. we're starting to talk about sex. i'm a virgin, he isn't tho. my ex and i dated for 2 years, but i never wanted to have sex, but we attempted oral, but he wasn't into it. ...
A. 23 July 2010: Yes. A smaller penis is normally about the size of maybe 5 fingers, while a tampon is the size of one. Just to give you some perspective. Some penises are larger. Look up what is the average girth of a penis, and then you will see. It is totally ... (read in full...)
How can I stop cheating, lying, hurting and stealing???
Q. How can I stop cheating, lying, hurting and stealing??? How can I change?? Who can help me?? who has the right answer??? Why am I doing this specially to the those who love me and close to me??? How can I change?? Why am I angry?? Why do I fail?? Am ...
A. 23 July 2010: I think you need to help yourself and then possible, if you really feel you are un-capable, go see a professional.
However, you need to take responsibility for your actions. Why you cheat? Only YOU know, so asking us is never going to give you... (read in full...)
My boyfriend never pays for anything!
Q. My boyfriend and i have been going out 3 months now, but hes never bought me anything. i know it seems petty, but it does bother me. he hasn't ever offered to buy me anything, as little as a coffee or something and i hate seeing my friends spoiled ...
A. 23 July 2010: If this is so important to you why did you start dating him?
But yeah, stop being fakely polite. You wanted him to pay the ticket, you didn't even have money for it, and he offered to pay. LET HIM. He might just think that you are an independ... (read in full...)
Lied to a woman about my age. - 16 dating a 24 year old.
Q. I feel like an idiot. I'm 16 years old and I'm dating someone who's 24. Though, when we met.. I lied about my age and said I was 20. She believes it too because I look and sound 20. We haven't been going out very long, a month at the mos...
A. 22 July 2010: ?You've been best friends yet she doesn't even know your age? I beg the differ. You share everything with each other? When you are unable to share the most basic thing, how do you think anything else you share has any value? Tell her the truth ... (read in full...)
Is it that bad to be a virgin, & why is it such a big deal?
Q. I'm 17 and im gay, but i'm also a virgin, i've never really been in a real relationship, which seems weird because if you saw and knew me you would've never guessed. but everytime i try to pursue a relationship with another female, when i t...
A. 22 July 2010: I know what you mean. I guess people back away from virgins because they think you might be saving yourself or have high standards or are picky. How about you word yourself differently? When you are about to enter a relationship with a girl, don't ... (read in full...)
We have sex so much but I never get to finish
Q. I have few questions. My b/f and me just started having sex last week. I lost my virginity to him last Friday. Since then we have had sex every day. It was a little uncomfortable the first 10 times but now it is better. He said he stretched me ...
A. 22 July 2010: You need to have your guy practice on lasting longer. He also needs to perform foreplay on you and get you to almost come. Then when he goes in you you will already be close to the edge.
But as a last note... good heavens you must have natural ... (read in full...)
Will he break up with me because I'm shy about oral sex?
Q. My boyfriend and I are engaging in oral sex. First time for both of us...well I am shy so these first few times we focused on him. He is more loving and attentive since we began this new fun way of showing our 3 love!!! I want him to do me, but ...
A. 22 July 2010: He wont break up with you, he sounds like a great guy! The only reason he pulls away from you is because he wants to go down on you before he lets you pleasure him again. What a great guy to put your pleasure before his!
Now, try to focus less on ... (read in full...)
What do I do about this girl??
Q. Been dating her for a month. I'm 33 she is 32. There has been no sex. NONE! Not even close really. We've talked about it, she knows im getting frustrated. She claims she doesn't know me well enough and that we haven't been on enough proper dates. I ...
A. 22 July 2010: So she insulted you.. well it is hard to say who did what and impossible for us to judge in some tit for tat game. Bottom line is: if you feel you are not being treated right (not the no sex, but the no guys night out, she being jealous, controlling ... (read in full...)
What do I do about this girl??
Q. Been dating her for a month. I'm 33 she is 32. There has been no sex. NONE! Not even close really. We've talked about it, she knows im getting frustrated. She claims she doesn't know me well enough and that we haven't been on enough proper dates. I ...
A. 22 July 2010: You've seen her for a month, yet you act like you have been with her for a year. Excuse me, but.. "I like her, she is beautiful and a lot of fun in the beginning". What beginning? This IS the beginning. An no, one month is not a long time to go ... (read in full...)
Am I still a virgin?
Q. Hi! IT's Been a long time since i'm asking myself that i was virgin or not!i still can't understand i haven't asked anyone yet.3 Years ago i had an infection in chanels of urine and it stinged a lot so i put my finger inside and when i pull ...
A. 22 July 2010: You are a virgin. To not be a virgin you need to have had sex and had a penis inside you (or something larger than your finger at least). A finger or two, or tampons, don't qualify as "taking your virginity" if you ask me. Simply put, you are a ... (read in full...)
I feel like I may not reach being 18
Q. well i have been feeling very depressed for a good 8 months now. my hair started falling out,i would get terrible migraines an throw up, wouldnt enjoy things that i once used to enjoy everything was like a task, i would cry every single night, co...
A. 22 July 2010: You will reach 18, one way or the other. The good thing about time is that it doesn't slow down, so you will most certainly reach 18. All you need to do is hang in there.
You need to talk to your boyfriend and family about what is going on in yo... (read in full...)
Trust is broken by myself towards my bridesmaid/best friend
Q. "OP Own Title" trust is broken by myself towards my bridesmaid/best friend. I have none to blame but myself. I'm not out for sympathy or anything because I don't want it or deserve it. my best friend who is also my bridesmaid and who I have kno...
A. 22 July 2010: Give it a month. But send her a message first/try talking to her, and then explain that you are sorry. Then let her be for at least a month or more.... (read in full...)
Does it seem like he likes me?
Q. there is a man that works in a game shop that i go in. everytime i go in there and he is working he looks at me and smiles and comes over to see if i need help, and sometimes it is as soon as i walk in the shop. none of the other employees do that. ...
A. 22 July 2010: Probably a bit, but clearly he is not at a stage yet where he wants to ask you.. since he hasn't. But he does like you. For the moment maybe more as a friend, but if you step this flirting up a bit, and maybe invite him out yourself, this could ... (read in full...)
Is my vagina sore because it was rough or another reason?
Q. it had been a month at th longest since ive had sex, and i just recently had sex on saturday night just gone, it is now wednesday. i have a really sore vagina, like it hurts when i pee, th sex was rough though. is that normal? should i go see the ...
A. 22 July 2010: Yes, to prevent UTI, pee after sex. Also drink cranberry juice or take cranberry pills. If you can't stand cranberry juice drink orange juice or other juices with high level of acid. This creates a hostile environment for the bacteria that causes ... (read in full...)
Am I doing the right thing by leaving him?
Q. Hey all My boyfriend is a great guy, but he recently had a secret friendship with a girl that, when I found out, broke my heart, as it felt so deceptive and I have always been honest and straight-up with him and expected the same. We've been p...
A. 22 July 2010: Before I answer, I need to ask you something. Im wondering if you have even thought about this yourself, since from your post it doesn't look like it.
You want to "move forward". What does that mean? What do you want exactly? Do you want to have ... (read in full...)
Trust is broken by myself towards my bridesmaid/best friend
Q. "OP Own Title" trust is broken by myself towards my bridesmaid/best friend. I have none to blame but myself. I'm not out for sympathy or anything because I don't want it or deserve it. my best friend who is also my bridesmaid and who I have kno...
A. 21 July 2010: What you did wasn't good at all. But what I don't get is.. why didn't she just untag herself? Anyway, the best you can do now is take down those friggin pictures once and for all. You should have done it as soon as she asked you to. Then just hope ... (read in full...)
I don't like it when other guys especially older stare at my Girlfriend, and when my GF goes on webcam. how do I deal with this?
Q. "OP Own Title" Hi , i have a girlfreind and have been with her for almost 7 months , i really do love her and she loves me , i trust her 100% and she trusts me, but there are 2 things i hate about this relationship ,because she has big boobs every ...
A. 21 July 2010: You need to let her handle herself. I get that it bothers you, but as for the internet, it is not your job to keep her safe. That is her parents job, and her own job. Be careful, the line between "protecting" and "controlling" is very thin.
As fo... (read in full...)
Is it normal for guys to sleep around after they lose the love of their lives?
Q. Is it normal for guys to sleep around after they "lose" the love of their lives? Is this "forgivable behaviour" if one were to get back together with them after a three month break up?...
A. 21 July 2010: It is quite normal both for men and women as a way of dealing with the heartache. It is also normal to sit at home and sulk with a bucket of ice cream. Both ways are normal, it just depends a bit on the person.
This is acceptable behaviou... (read in full...)
Condoms and sex in the shower
Q. if you have sex in the shower, will the condom break? Or will it not work all together?...
A. 21 July 2010: Condoms work as usual in the shower, water is not an issue at all. ... (read in full...)
I really like my boyfriend's friend and don't know what to do about it!
Q. Me and my boyfriend, Justin, and I have been dating for almost two months. i really like him but i just met his friend Drew. I felt really attracted to Drew and Drew even treated me better than Justin did. Drew was major flirting with me the whole ...
A. 21 July 2010: Drew sounds like bad news to me. He openly flirted with his friends gf? He is not serious and only a player if you ask me. If you were single he might not have flirted with you. Maybe he thought it was ok because you were not single, so you wouldn't ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants me to wear makeup and dress up like a woman
Q. Hi, i'm 28 yrs old. During our intimate sessions me try to be innovative to make it fun. Last week my girlfriend made me wear her clothes. We had fun so tried it once again. Now she wants me to wear her lingerie next time and also dress up as a ...
A. 21 July 2010: It is only too far if you feel uncomfortable with it. ... (read in full...)
I would never date a man with 'baggage'
Q. I'm 21 and his son is 5 years old, we been seeing each other 5 months. He never told me he had a child till 3 months into our relationship as I had told him, a few times before that I would never date a man with 'baggage' he still decided to see me ...
A. 21 July 2010: Miamine says a lot of what I was thinking too. Not only will this not work.. What I was most shocked about is that this man is so low, he not only accepts that he has limited contact with his own child, and hides his child away from you, he also ... (read in full...)
I have never gotten girls I am attracted to to date me
Q. I got to move on in my life and have because I have a date with this other girl but I still think about this girl I have a crush on. what are some things I can do to get over the first girl, I don't want to lose sleep over her and think about ...
A. 21 July 2010: You are 16-17. That is the sole reason for your troubles. I am honest with you now. You might think it is about looks but it is not. At that age everything is down to personality and chance. You could be lucky and you could be un-lucky. The ... (read in full...)
My lazy husband! I feel like a single mom but I'm married!
Q. My husband is lazy! I work 40hrs a week, take care of our 13 month old daughter, cook, clean, heck I even do yard work, and all he does is work, which I understand he might be tired, but he doesnt help with anything. I feel like I am a single mom, ...
A. 21 July 2010: Have a serious talk with him, and then PLAN. Say today you got the kid, tomorrow it is his turn. You can do for example two days each with the majority care of the kid. OR, make a clearly defined list over who does what. He can play video games and ... (read in full...)
Why was he suddenly in a hurry when I rubbed it?
Q. so the other day it was the first time i touched my mans penis and i was surprised i wasnt scared at all. nothing like i thought it was going to be. but after a while of me touching it and rubbing it he moved my hand and sat up quickly and like ...
A. 21 July 2010: Was he erect? ... (read in full...)
Is feeling loved different than someone loving you?
Q. is feeling loved different to someone loving you? i feel it is but my partner is happy to just tell me he loves me and to him thats him loving me. is he just incapable of connecting with me emotionally and caring how i feel? does this mean he doesnt ...
A. 21 July 2010: Like said before, what you talk about is "action says more than words". He can tell you he loves you, but if his actions doesnt show it, then you are not feeling loved. And that is just how it works. To hear "I love you" is important, but it also ... (read in full...)
My period is late, could I possibly be pregnant?
Q. i had sex on the 10th of july and i dont use contreception with my fiance...we use withdrawel method, wen he pulled out he didnt do it quick enough and caught just of the inside of my vagina and the rest on my clitoris and groin...i was due on my ...
A. 21 July 2010: The pull out method is a method for getting pregnant really. If you don't want to be pregnant use a contraceptive. Or you could have taken the morning after pill. That is, of you really didn't want to become pregnant.
Yes, you might be pregnant... (read in full...)
Is my vagina sore because it was rough or another reason?
Q. it had been a month at th longest since ive had sex, and i just recently had sex on saturday night just gone, it is now wednesday. i have a really sore vagina, like it hurts when i pee, th sex was rough though. is that normal? should i go see the ...
A. 21 July 2010: Sounds like urinary tract infection to me. A new partner can often be the cause of an infection because of the different bacteria's they bring with them. This is normal, everyone has healthy bacteria down there, but when two sets are mixed it ... (read in full...)
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