| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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She wants to take a "Mommy Break". Would getting her a weekend by herself for V-Day be unromantic?
Q. Would it be horribly un-romantic for me to book a beachfront room for my wife to take a 2-day getaway by herself, as a Valentines Day gift? She has been talking about wanting to take a "mommy break" as in, get away for a couple days to relax, read, ...
A. 7 February 2011: I think it's a great idea for valentines. It's not unromantic at all. Being together doesn't have to be the norm for valentines, giving each other a much needed or desired gift can be very romantic as well, and your idea is romantic too. You don't ... (read in full...)
Whatever happened to holding hands and watching the sunset?
Q. So, alot of things have been hard to adjust to since I got out of the Army. Not the least of which has been dating, or...not dating, I suppose. I like to think I'm a nice guy, outgoing in public, but private at home. I own my own house, and c...
A. 7 February 2011: I don't know what to say to everything you wrote, or if I even can give you advice. But one thing put me off by what you wrote. Being celibate is all fine with a lot of women I suppose... But it's this signal of you being "better" than them that ... (read in full...)
Will having sex with my friend help me get over my ex?
Q. I can't get over my ex but I'm good friends with a guy who treats me like a queen and wants me to be his girlfriend and wife one day but I'm still messed up in my head about my ex. If I have sex with my good guy friend, will that make me get over my ...
A. 7 February 2011: No. It won't work like that. You will only get more confused. Never start a new relationship before the previous one is over and done with. ... (read in full...)
Retroactive Jealousy An Opposite View Point
Q. I have read the articles on Retroactive Jealousy with great interest. I am the one that caused RJ in my lover, I have had less sexual partners than him but I have more sexual experiences. I am not proud of the things I have done and I am trying to ...
A. 7 February 2011: Thank you for writing this.... (read in full...)
It's only been a week -- should I get him something for Valentine's?
Q. Just got a new boyfriend. He's great and dead sweet, but its a week before valentines day. should i get him something if we've only been together a week? and if yes, what?...
A. 6 February 2011: I think it's nice to write a note or give a cute card. I guess it depends on how seriously it's celebrated where you live. But where I live it's not taken seriously, and valentines card are often given to friends as well. A valentines card is the ... (read in full...)
Can I get an STD from performing oral sex on my virgin boyfriend?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have never had any sexual encounters if any kind. Could either of us get an std from unprotected oral sex?...
A. 6 February 2011: There are a few STD's that transfer through blood as well. Such as HIV and Hepatitis B. Herpes can be caught from kissing. Usually though you'd know if you had an STD like those ones as you will get very sick from it. Although Herpes can stay ... (read in full...)
I feel really sad and depressed and need a shoulder to cry on. How can I let out my sadness?
Q. i am the most positive person u will ever meet. i always see the best in people and every situation im in. i love life to the fullest and i love myself so much but sometimes i get so depressed sometimes it takes over and i cant stand it...i don't ...
A. 6 February 2011: I think I understand you. For a long time I went with sadness inside me and without telling anyone. I'd cry every night, and from the crying got headaches the following morning and actually flunked a couple of classes in high school due to staying ... (read in full...)
He knew I was coming to see him but when I got there he had a girl in his room
Q. Ok so I am with this guy for four months and found out last week that we are having a baby. We don't live together so I went over to his apt in between classes to see him. He knew I was coming over. So i go in the front door and ask his roommate ...
A. 5 February 2011: believe him. but only if he actually opens the door for you so you get to see the girl wasnt naked behind it.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend expects me to go to bed in bra and g string every night
Q. Hi, I've been with my bf for four years now. He expects me to go to bed in a g string and push up bra everynight at least. He also becomes angry and frustrated if you doesn't either get a hand job or hand job at least. My libido is very low as there ...
A. 5 February 2011: He has insane and unacceptable expectations. But the lack of respect is what is most present here. Men are not supposed to ever expect sex, or expect that we dress up, they are supposed to love us for how we naturally look. If your man can't do that ... (read in full...)
I want to marry her, but she chooses to date the guy who treats her like garbage!
Q. Dear Cupid, I was dating this girl long distance for two years, we fell completely in love. My family lived in the city she lived in and me a different one. We had picked out an engagment ring and planned to get married with her moving to me. At...
A. 4 February 2011: Have you even told her how you feel about her? After all, wasn't it you who ended it with her? How is she supposed to know that you still care for her that way unless you tell her?
And perhaps she is scared of getting back with you as you were... (read in full...)
I want to abstain from sex until I meet someone special, will this mean my vagina will get tighter?
Q. So im 19 years old and in my whole life I had sex 4 times with 4 guys. Ive just want to be with somebody that I could could make love with a special person. But now I want to abstain from sex until im a serious relation or until i finish college ( ...
A. 3 February 2011: It can get a little tighter yes. Mine does at least, when long time goes between when I have sex. It doesn't turn into virgin-tight. But tight enough for it to feel unusual to have sex, and for me to need to take it slow unless Im very well ... (read in full...)
He called me his ex's name!
Q. Last night my boyfriend and I were in bed and I was kissing him and he turned round and said 'No *****' (Not my name) so I imediately jumped up and said what did you just call me?? He tried to grab me and hug me and said sorry but at least I was ...
A. 3 February 2011: Don't focus on this. It was a slip-up, and him telling you he used to say no to her was his way of trying to cover his ass. Don't get hung up in it, it doesn't mean anything. It's happened only once at that too, so let it go. It happens. Not only ... (read in full...)
Why did he stop running back to me?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend and now he has a gilfriend. I'm fuming because she's prettier and nicer then me. All of our mutual friends adore her. She's nice to me to and that pisses me off. How could my boyfriend move on from me so fast?!!! He ...
A. 3 February 2011: Haahaha, this is hysterical. Thank you so much for posting it and giving us a good laugh.
And no, I do not consider this to be a real situation. It's far too satirical to be for real. Although, so that I am not looked down upon for posting ... (read in full...)
I really like him, but I'm helping a friend to date him!
Q. I really am in like with this guy at work. He has so much in common with me in so many ways, I feel like we are perfect for each other. And I know he can see it... I can see it when he asks me certain questions, because he's trying to figure me ...
A. 3 February 2011: I think you should stop helping her out. Just be honest about this. You like the guy. You want him to not be with her, but get to know him better yourself. It's all ok! Just because she saw him first doesn't mean he's limited to date only her. It's ... (read in full...)
Is it ok for my girlfriend to be kissing her female friends?
Q. hey guys i have soemthing to ask you all is it okay when the girls kinda kiss each other, not with tongue though, but just kissing, my girlfriend is doin this with her friends and its really pissing me off :S i always tell her to stop doin it but...
A. 2 February 2011: It depends on the person. Obviously this is fine for her and her girlfriends. It's not fine for you. But, I promote respect for each other and I absolutely can not stand it when a man tries to control his partner. Let the woman kiss her friends, ... (read in full...)
Do we need some sort of help? my fiance and I have fought everyday since we started living together
Q. My fiance and I decided to move in together, before we got married. We have only been living together a little over a week and already argued everyday. The arguments are usually really stupid but I feel like we just get on each others nerves. I k...
A. 2 February 2011: You need to have an adult, calm conversation with him, and bite your teeth to avoid saying unnecessary or hurtful things. When first moving in together, and with a baby to take care of as well, there will be many small bumps in the road. Much of it ... (read in full...)
How do people make up after arguments?
Q. How do people make up after arguments? My soon-to-be ex used to say that because I started most arguments (it is true), I should make up to him. He would refuse to give me any affection because I would not, in his words, deserve it for abusing him ...
A. 2 February 2011: I don't think thats fair. He's your soon to be ex. Figure out a better way to settle arguments with your new boyfriend instead of with a soon-to-be-ex.
People don't "make up" after an argument. They settle on something in the argument, and then... (read in full...)
Is it hard for beautiful women to form good relationships?
Q. Hi All, I am just wondering what it is like to be beautiful and if it is hard to meet quality people? Beautiful women are always getting chatted up for dates, hit on for their looks, even propositioned for sex. It is no wonder then that many of ...
A. 2 February 2011: I want to add a question of my own to this, seeing as our answers are so different. It is likely that it is dependent on the community and social practice of that particular location as well, right? I've not experience beauty as an issue for me, ... (read in full...)
Do women feel aroused during breastfeeding?
Q. Hi, I was just curious and it might sound silly, but it's quite important for me to know. As most of us know, breast and nipples are very sensitive when sucked/licked/touched. So I was thinking about those women who breastfeed, constantly havin...
A. 2 February 2011: I'll also add that women do not feel pleasure by using a tampon. ... (read in full...)
Losing virginity - later linked to health problems: is there truth in this ABC news article?
Q. I am a male in my 20's and I am beginning to wonder if I have made the best choices in life or if I would regret my decisions regarding sex in the near future. I had made the choice not to have sex until the right woman appears in my life for ...
A. 2 February 2011: Physically incompetent? They mean your hands, tongue and fingers stop working, and that your penis can't get erect? My boyfriend is a virgin and he's 24, and he's certainly in no way incompetent. In any way. In fact he appears to be more than ... (read in full...)
Do women feel aroused during breastfeeding?
Q. Hi, I was just curious and it might sound silly, but it's quite important for me to know. As most of us know, breast and nipples are very sensitive when sucked/licked/touched. So I was thinking about those women who breastfeed, constantly havin...
A. 1 February 2011: From what I've heard: absolutely not. A baby bites, sucks hard, it's uncomfortable often, the nipple skin dries up and hurts, can even bleed etc etc, and the skin's tissue change. In addition it's your baby! Would you be aroused if your baby ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend just dumped me because she thinks I'm being paranoid!
Q. my girlfriend has just dumped me because she think iam being paranoid. 2 weeks ago she changed her profile picture on facebook and i started to get paranoid so i started asking her if she loved me and she replied yes. but the next day i appologised ...
A. 1 February 2011: It's over and you need to respect that she wants to have no contact with you. I believe there are other reasons behind by she broke it off with you, it would be weird to break it off over only this one thing. Do you honestly not think you have been ... (read in full...)
Is this age gap too big?
Q. how big an age gap is too big? the guy i like is 24, and i'm 17. that's quite a big gap, but i was just wondering if it's too huge or if it's acceptable because my opinion is just what i want to hear so i wanted to know other opinions....
A. 1 February 2011: Too big for my liking at that age. If you were 20 and he 27 it'd be a little better. You 22 and he 29 even better. ... (read in full...)
Am I being irrational?
Q. This likely sounds irrational but it's been playing on my mind lately.. My boyfriend is a talented artist, just as a hobby, and most of the subjects he paints are fantasy figures of naked or provocative women with say mythical creatures. This has ...
A. 1 February 2011: Yes you are being irrational. Those things he draws is his art. If he painted flowers would you be jealous of that? No. Look at his art the same way, they are fantasy creatures. He finds them beautiful like you find flowers beautiful, or a wild ... (read in full...)
Is it hard for beautiful women to form good relationships?
Q. Hi All, I am just wondering what it is like to be beautiful and if it is hard to meet quality people? Beautiful women are always getting chatted up for dates, hit on for their looks, even propositioned for sex. It is no wonder then that many of ...
A. 1 February 2011: Beautiful women don't have it harder than any other woman. Easier most will say, but you need to remember that the average douchebag will hit on anything he can screw over. Which means every woman on the globe is likely to be approached by guys who ... (read in full...)
I've been so lonely since my boyfriend has been away I had phone sex with another guy!
Q. What have I done? My boyfriend has now been away since October and I miss him so much, and there's still 2 months left to go. I can't imagine being with anyone else but him. But I've done something horrific... I was on the phone to a very close ...
A. 1 February 2011: Sex talk, or talking while touching?
It's not the worst thing you could have done, and while completely unacceptable, it's not always a deal breaker. That depends on how your boyfriend views this. But you could also write it off as a mistake ... (read in full...)
Is kissing sexual?
Q. Is kissing sexaul? My friend told me and my short kisses that I had with my ex werte sexaul even thougfh they only lasted one-five seconds, Are kisses sexaul??...
A. 1 February 2011: I think they can be, and they can be friendly. It depends on your connection with the one you kiss, and what emotions you feel when you kiss. ... (read in full...)
How do relationships turn out if one person is on medication and has depression?
Q. I am at a stage of life where I am not sure what to do. I am not in a relationship at the moment and I have never been approached by a woman ever. And I have been rejected a few times before. The question is...How do relationships often turn out if ...
A. 1 February 2011: I would say it is possible for a relationship to work out, but not with just about anyone. First off you need to establish a lot of trust and a good friendship. And you will have to be open and honest about your depression, and be willing to talk ... (read in full...)
People, have you been hurt terribly, but found love again after the hurt??
Q. I'm writing about my story about how I can't let the past go and how it has crippled my life and the way I live. My story begins when I met a girl at 26 years old she was 24. I just have fallen very much in love with her and she betrayed me and it ...
A. 1 February 2011: Cheaters are selfish people. That is what is going through their mind when they hurt someone, all they think about is "me me me". But, no matter how much we try and understand them it doesn't chance the situation: cheating is not acceptable. And ... (read in full...)
People, have you been hurt terribly, but found love again after the hurt??
Q. I'm writing about my story about how I can't let the past go and how it has crippled my life and the way I live. My story begins when I met a girl at 26 years old she was 24. I just have fallen very much in love with her and she betrayed me and it ...
A. 1 February 2011: Is it possible to love again? Absolutely. I don't even need to read your question to answer you that. The heart is able to heal, time heals all wounds, and when your heart is big and your body filled with love, you can love again. You'll never be ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend doesn't want more children, yet we never use protection
Q. I'm not sure if I'm pregnant or not. This is all new to me sex and all. I've been having sex with my boyfriend at least twice on the weekends. Sometimes 4 times. Sometimes he pulls out sometimes not. I know you can get preggers pulling out. Lately ...
A. 1 February 2011: The only way you know if you are pregnant or not is by taking a pregnancy test. When you can use one, and how to, is written on the box of the pregnancy test. Go buy one at the pharmacy, and you will figure it out.
However I seriously doubt yo... (read in full...)
I think she wants me to pop the question but I'm terrified!
Q. I've been dating my girlfriend for a little over a year. We have become very close over the course of the past year. Recently, she has let me know that she is ready to move onto the next phase of our relationship, i.e. she wants me to pop THE ...
A. 1 February 2011: That's all fair enough. Then you know your girlfriend isn't the one, at least not just yet. It doesn't change my previous answer to you. You may believe your ex is causing you this trouble, and that the solution is to stay away from her.. But your ... (read in full...)
What is a minor?
Q. dear readers, i would like to know what you people out there consider a minor? i.e a lot of the questions that are asked on here are not answered but people because they say you are a minor. but what age is really conssidered a minor? i know 15...
A. 1 February 2011: What is considered to be a minor is dependent on the law in that country/state. The age varies with what type of activity we are talking about. Typically there will be an age limit on these things: sex, alcohol, gambling, driving, voting etc.
... (read in full...)
What do guys like or see in a girl or potential girlfriend?
Q. guys when u were 13 what did u like or want to see in a girl?? becuase i really like this guy and i am myself around him i just want to grab his attention so i lead him into more of the girlfreind direction rather than the freind direction, because ...
A. 1 February 2011: I don't think 13 year old boys think about relationships much, or about girlfriends much. If they're a decent good guy they'll probably go with whoever they think looks cute and who they have an ok friendship with, and the girl needs to take the ... (read in full...)
I think she wants me to pop the question but I'm terrified!
Q. I've been dating my girlfriend for a little over a year. We have become very close over the course of the past year. Recently, she has let me know that she is ready to move onto the next phase of our relationship, i.e. she wants me to pop THE ...
A. 1 February 2011: Don't over-think this. You learned to be cautious from your past relationship, we all do. We loose some of that naivety, perhaps get a bit withdrawn emotionally. It's not uncommon, and it's not something that's really in the way of any future ... (read in full...)
How can I get my daughters boyfriend to pay his way?
Q. Hi, I would really appreciate some advice regarding my daughter's boyfriend. His mum threw him out and he was living with me full time for a while but i couldn't sustain it because I was made redundant and didn't have much money plus I was unwell ...
A. 31 January 2011: Kick him out if he can't pay his rent. He doesn't get to stay for free, plain and simple. The choice is his. Either he pays or he goes to live for free back with his own mom. It's not unfair, and it's not being hard on him either, it's simply the ... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about my girlfriend after we had anal sex?
Q. Me and my girlfriend had anal sex for the first time and the next day she was complaining that her butt-hole hurt and it bled when she tried going to the restroom. is this serious should I be worried?? Please help!!!! (Note this was our first time)...
A. 31 January 2011: If the bleeding does not stop she should see her doctor. If she had a small cut the wound should heal itself pretty fast, maybe a day or two at most.
Don't have anal sex again, this obviously didn't work for her and she could actually get sick... (read in full...)
Should I confront this crazy coworker and tell her to stop stalking my husband?
Q. I discovered that one of my husbands much younger employees was sending him "I love you type" text messages. When I confronted him, he told me I misunderstood the context. He says the girl admitted to him that she was contemplating suicide and he ...
A. 31 January 2011: Could it be that she looks up to him as a father figure being that he is much older? Don't automatically think she wants him in bed, and if that was the case trust your husband to deal with this himself.
Im thinking that if she is feeling ... (read in full...)
I want to please my boyfriend, but I don't like the taste of penis and cum! Any suggestions?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend and I have been together for a while now and we have a sexually active relationship. It's all good apart from one bit... he really likes head, but the problem is I really don't like the taste of penis and cum, and he keeps making R...
A. 31 January 2011: You're too young for sex!
But the general idea here, for future knowledge:
Clean him up before hand. Ask him about his diet, there are things you can eat and avoid eating to change the taste of the spunk.
But the easiest thing to do, is to h... (read in full...)
I don't want girls to run away because my pubic hair is all over the place?
Q. ok im quite embarrassed abart this but my pubic hair is really long around my genitals and on my bottom. every time i look down there or see my bottom in a mirror it looks very messy and horrible to look at. i don't want to get rid of it all i ...
A. 31 January 2011: You buy a pair of small scissors and you cut it shorter. Not too short. Just short enough to clean up a mess and make it look better. Keep the scissors in private, you don't want them to be used on anything other than your personals or on your own ... (read in full...)
Does the size of a girl's "pearl in her flower" matter to men?
Q. Ok guys, please be honest! Does the size of girl's "pearl in her flower" matter to you? I didn’t think mine was big till my boyfriend said, “wow your "pearl" gets so big when you’re turned on.” He makes jokes about it. Now I’m self conscious about ...
A. 31 January 2011: What is this pearl? If you mean the clitoris then.. no guys don't care about that. If the guy gets to see you naked I can assure you, whatever it is you think you have of imperfections will NOT be on his brain. This is what will be on his brain: ... (read in full...)
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