| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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Affective Sexuality: Whatever happened to it?
Q. The story begins with a guy and a girl falling in love on their first date. Everything went perfect. They both click the first time they laid their eyes on each other, and they're hoping to "get it on" tonight. However, they found out that they're ...
A. 24 July 2011: No need to get offended. It is simple facts. You not having the experience does not mean you are naive, you shouldn't get offended so easily. You not having experience with sex simply means you do not have experience with sex. This is also the ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend who is away on a trip was really mean to me and still hasn't apologized...
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 and half years now. He is 23 and I am 21. He is currently on a snowboarding trip with the ski and snowboard club at his university. He was supposed to call me last night but didn't. When I called him he picke...
A. 20 February 2011: You know your man better than I ever will. So in this case I am afraid I can't help you. I can only say that people don't change, and you know that as well since you know this isn't the first time he's been acting this way. Then I am sure you know ... (read in full...)
My gf is bi-sexual and she has a gf, and I can't take it anymore!!
Q. I'm in a tight problem. This woman that I love and have been loving all year is bi-sexual and has a girlfriend. This is the first time I've ever felt this strong for someone. I think about her all the time and put her before I do myself. It's crazy. ...
A. 20 February 2011: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/tired-of-waiting-on-a-woman-who-is.html
Duplicate question, here's the link to the other one.... (read in full...)
Could I have gotten HIV from this? Condom broke!
Q. hello guys, im kinda freakin out right now. yesterday i went clubbing with some friends and we got really drunk. and there was this girl next to me. so i went to talk to her and we danced and everything. later on she went home with me and we had ...
A. 20 February 2011: It's illegal in many countries to have HIV and not warn your sexual partner about it. It's being recognized as a lethal attack on a person, and you could be sentenced like a person who killed someone in cold blood if you spread the disease knowing ... (read in full...)
Please help me, have I lost my mum and dad?
Q. Hi, I am really quite down and need some advice regarding the relationship with my parents. My parents came to spend xmas with me in Germany and it was difficult work having them with me, my dad is one of these people who has to be doing somet...
A. 20 February 2011: Oh that's right, Im sorry, I mixed the months up. I thought your husband left in June and the children would go on holiday in July. That changes things a bit, if you want to have the children at home with the husband and you that makes sense and you ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend who is away on a trip was really mean to me and still hasn't apologized...
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for 3 and half years now. He is 23 and I am 21. He is currently on a snowboarding trip with the ski and snowboard club at his university. He was supposed to call me last night but didn't. When I called him he picke...
A. 20 February 2011: First time this happened? Or does he feel like getting mean every time he drinks and smokes?
I think it's ultimatum time. Either he stops drinking to that point, and smoking, or he stops talking to you. Not calling when he's promised to is a no-... (read in full...)
Please help me, have I lost my mum and dad?
Q. Hi, I am really quite down and need some advice regarding the relationship with my parents. My parents came to spend xmas with me in Germany and it was difficult work having them with me, my dad is one of these people who has to be doing somet...
A. 20 February 2011: Are you sure you are not over-reacting to this? Your father is speaking to you, but your mother is holding a grudge. Unless you have done something else to cause trouble between yourself and your parents, a one time case of being mooody shouldn't ... (read in full...)
How does a lover determine the loving is very successfully satisfying a woman?
Q. hello everyone. my question is mainly for females but its okay to have different point of views, i just want to know how can a lover really make sure that the girl is enjoying sex with the lover ?! how does a man determine or know that she really l...
A. 20 February 2011: Pay attention to the sounds she makes, the speed of her breath (faster is better), the way she moves, if she's active and passionate that is the best. If she's wet downstairs it's a good sign, if she responds to your kisses with passion, if she rubs ... (read in full...)
My gf is bi-sexual and she has a gf, and I can't take it anymore!!
Q. I'm in a tight problem. This woman that I love and have been loving all year is bi-sexual and has a girlfriend. This is the first time I've ever felt this strong for someone. I think about her all the time and put her before I do myself. It's crazy. ...
A. 20 February 2011: I don't understand if this is your girlfriend or not? The title says girlfriend, but your question doesn't mention it. Is she just a person you are in love with at a distance, a friend of yours who you are not in a relationship with? Or is she ... (read in full...)
She's not a virgin but doesn't want to have sex with me!
Q. Hello everyone, thanks for taking the time to read my question. Anyhow so I currently have a girlfriend. She is not a virgin; I am. We have been dating for 8 months now and I want to have sex but she keeps telling me she wants to wait until ...
A. 20 February 2011: She's within her rights to wait with sex until marriage if she wants to even if she's not a virgin. She might regret having sex with that other guy, or probably regrets it since she wont have sex now. And that's what it's about, not trust, but that ... (read in full...)
Could I have gotten HIV from this? Condom broke!
Q. hello guys, im kinda freakin out right now. yesterday i went clubbing with some friends and we got really drunk. and there was this girl next to me. so i went to talk to her and we danced and everything. later on she went home with me and we had ...
A. 20 February 2011: You should get yourself tested in about two weeks time. You can call your doctor and explain the situation. But as far as I am aware, they can't test you earlier than in two weeks.
I hope you got that womans phone number or full name so you can ... (read in full...)
Is it too soon in our life to have a relationship so serious?
Q. My girlfriend is 14, and I am 15. We're both very mature for our age. We both have a strong lead in Creative Writing and English Lit. We've been dating for a month and a half and we tell each other we love one another. I mean it when I say it, I ...
A. 19 February 2011: As long as you are not planning on babies or getting married it isn't wrong, or a bad idea, to experience love at a young age. Treat her with respect as you already are, and enjoy what you have. In the end that's the best thing you can do in life: ... (read in full...)
How can I hide from my husband that I'm not a virgin
Q. im not virgin and im going to married in 1 year and so how can i hide from my husband...
A. 19 February 2011: Why do you need to hide from your future husband that you are not a virgin? What sort of relationship do you have with him at the moment?... (read in full...)
How can I reassure her that she's not fat?
Q. how can i tell my girlfriend she is NOT fat or ugly? every time i tell her she's beautiful she gets mad at me because she thinks she is ugly. how can i show her she's beautiful how can i make her not think so negatively about her body?...
A. 18 February 2011: Try a different technique. She doesn't like it when you comment on her body. And no matter how many times you tell her by words, she wont listen, and only start to tell herself not to listen to you, not to believe in your words, that your words ... (read in full...)
What does "did you finish" mean?
Q. What does it mean when a guy asks "did you finish" when dry humping? me and my boyfriend were doing this and we got really into it. he later slowed things down and asked if i finished...i had no clue what that meant and i was to embarrassed to ask b...
A. 18 February 2011: Im curious myself what exactly this guy is thinking.
What he asked was: did you have an orgasm.
Next time ask him what he meant. It's not stupid to ask, it's stupid to pretend to know something you don't. Which is what your boyfriend did, h... (read in full...)
My boyfriend avoids kissing me because I have yellow teeth.
Q. my teeth is all colored by a shade of yellow which was caused by the type of drugs my mum took while carryin me iin the womb bt the 2 front teeth are more affected.i tried doing something abt them bt all the dentists i went to told me dt the ...
A. 18 February 2011: Is it impossible to find a boyfriend who actually loves you and isn't picking on your looks? It's not something you did to yourself, you can't help the color of your teeth. I once had a boyfriend who was a smoker and hadn't seen the dentist in ... (read in full...)
Would have I been better off if I had had a girlfriend years ago? Be honest.
Q. Hi everyone. I'm back. I would appreciate an honest answer to this question. I like feeling sorry for myself and blaming God for everything, but to do that, I need amunition. I need proof that what I'm complaining about is fair enough. I have always ...
A. 18 February 2011: God is not to blame. And people who have had girlfriends in the past are not more selfish. A girlfriend isn't some property, you talk like you were entitled to some "girlfriend". Think about who this girlfriend in your head is. Who is she to you? ... (read in full...)
Would have I been better off if I had had a girlfriend years ago? Be honest.
Q. Hi everyone. I'm back. I would appreciate an honest answer to this question. I like feeling sorry for myself and blaming God for everything, but to do that, I need amunition. I need proof that what I'm complaining about is fair enough. I have always ...
A. 17 February 2011: I don't understand the problem here, what is it you think you've missed out on? And what exactly do you mean by having a girlfriend earlier? Do you have your first girlfriend at the age of 30+? Were you sexually inexperienced? What exactly do you ... (read in full...)
So...does size really matter? Let's put it to rest.
Q. A good friend of mine let’s call him S is going through a very tough, emasculating time. A girlfriend of his made comments to her friends, stating that while she really enjoyed being with him, and that he was a great guy both emotionally and ...
A. 16 February 2011: Sorry for all the posts... but yours were so long that I forgot to answer all your questions, and I probably still haven't yet. However, your last question was if, hypothetically, I have the option of choosing what size I'd prefer for my otherwise ... (read in full...)
So...does size really matter? Let's put it to rest.
Q. A good friend of mine let’s call him S is going through a very tough, emasculating time. A girlfriend of his made comments to her friends, stating that while she really enjoyed being with him, and that he was a great guy both emotionally and ...
A. 16 February 2011: And Ohgetreal might want to correct it themselves, but I think what they meant was that some women haven't experienced the difference between a man with skills in bed and a man without skills in bed.
Most likely you know, your friend isn't un... (read in full...)
So...does size really matter? Let's put it to rest.
Q. A good friend of mine let’s call him S is going through a very tough, emasculating time. A girlfriend of his made comments to her friends, stating that while she really enjoyed being with him, and that he was a great guy both emotionally and ...
A. 16 February 2011: If she's commenting and complaining about her mans penis to the entire world then what she lacks isn't a fulfilling sex life, what she lacks is respect. I fully understand talking to your best friends about sex, it's a great way to share experiences ... (read in full...)
Affective Sexuality: Whatever happened to it?
Q. The story begins with a guy and a girl falling in love on their first date. Everything went perfect. They both click the first time they laid their eyes on each other, and they're hoping to "get it on" tonight. However, they found out that they're ...
A. 16 February 2011: I do think you'd understand sex better if you weren't a virgin. It's difficult, if not impossible, to try and analyze something you have never experienced. Much like trying to analyze a movie you've never seen, or describe the flavour of a fruit ... (read in full...)
Do I ask her too many questions?
Q. I'm currently becoming very close and developing feelings for a lady older and more experienced than me. She is 32, me 26, I am a virgin, she has had 2 long relationships, I have never had one, she is the first girl i have ever had deep feelings ...
A. 16 February 2011: Yes it's a bad idea to dig into her past. That said she's mature enough to be able to say no or to not answers questions she doesn't want to. Asking basic questions related to how someone could catch her attention, or what it was about her ex's that ... (read in full...)
Will a guy ever trust/like you again after you've slapped them?
Q. Hey everyone, thanks in advance for reading this:) So I have really disappointed myself. I have been dating a guy for a while, and we have had our differences, but lately things were perfect. We celebrated my birthday last week and it was great, t...
A. 16 February 2011: You're already kicking your own butt over slapping him, so Im not going to say anything else to that. Other than I don't think you need counseling if this was a one time off, and the way you react to it tells me you have your head screwed on right. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend doesn't like oral sex but sex is getting boring!
Q. How can I get my girlfriend to please me more? We have been together 3 years now and sex is getting dull. She won't do anal and oral won't work because of her small mouth. Sex games don't work because they usually entail some oral stimulation. And ...
A. 16 February 2011: Can you perform oral on her? And why is her small mouth a problem? All you'll need is a different technique and drop trying to deep throat or suck. There's still licking however, and handjobs. Not to mention a gazillion of different positions for ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend fell for the the fake profile that I created on a social networking site, to test him . What do I do now?
Q. I made a fake profile today on a social network and decided to add my boyfriend and see what he would do. Before him, I was in a really bad relationship full of lying and cheating, so I guess you can say I've become bitter and distrusting. I know he ...
A. 16 February 2011: Did he ever do anything to you so that you do not trust him? Do not bring your old relationship into your new one, or you will only rotten away and never get anywhere good. You want a relationship built on trust? Then trust him. Don't fill your time ... (read in full...)
What do women think about body hair on men?
Q. Just wondering what ladies, in general, think about body hair on a guy...?...
A. 16 February 2011: It's great!
But Im European, and it's ben brought to my attention that while we like it natural over here, on the American continent you shave it all off.
But yes, body hair on a man is great. Leave it as is, all else is superficial and ... (read in full...)
Help needed with his psycho ex-girlfriend!
Q. Ok so i have been dating this guy for only a few weeks. Everything has been lovely, but since this weekend his ex gf has been causing problems and sending him messages about her and other guys. Since this he has been really down. I don't know what ...
A. 15 February 2011: Perhaps you could wait it out a bit longer and see what happens next week. If this was a one-time off then it doesn't have to mean anything. Even if his ex isn't over him doesn't mean he isn't over her.
If this happens often you will have your ans... (read in full...)
Poetry, do guys like it?
Q. Just a random question for the guys... What do you think about a female sending you poetry? Would you appreciate it? Or think it was strange? What if you had been hurt by someone, and they sent you a poem saying that they were sorry, what would...
A. 15 February 2011: Depends on the guy I guess. If he's usually into poetry then sure. If poetry isn't a fascination of his already then don't send him poetry either. It'd be as romantic and interesting as him sending you the score in soccer.
Once a guy I wasn't r... (read in full...)
Will disowning a daughter from a previous relationship waiver my child support payments?
Q. Will disowning a daughter from a previous relationship waiver my child support payments? I'm currently paying for a child my ex partner refuses to let me see. I'm not a monster and this wasn't an easy decision to make but i've finally got to the ...
A. 15 February 2011: There is no such thing as a parent not allowing the other to see their child. Have you not heard about your rights as a parent? Educate yourself, read up about it, and learn your rights. There is no such thing as a parent being able to refuse the ... (read in full...)
What can I do to prevent razor burn?
Q. Girls only please! My boyfriend and I are planning to have sex for the first time next month. I'm a little nervous, but excited. The only thing knocking my confidence is my shaving. I used shaving foam and new razors, and moisturizer afte...
A. 14 February 2011: Oh yes, I never use shaving foam as it irritates the skin, I only use warm water and do it while in the shower or shortly after a shower. Then for moisturizer I like to use baby oil as it is perfume free and good for the sensitive skin. You should ... (read in full...)
What can I do to prevent razor burn?
Q. Girls only please! My boyfriend and I are planning to have sex for the first time next month. I'm a little nervous, but excited. The only thing knocking my confidence is my shaving. I used shaving foam and new razors, and moisturizer afte...
A. 14 February 2011: You need to let your hair grow back out Im afraid. The only way to prevent that from happening is to not let it happen in the first place. If that happens every time you shave then there's little you can do. Try not to shave at all but cut it short ... (read in full...)
Role playing questions
Q. a little while ago, my boyfriend thought that we should start doing the whole role playing in bed thing. it sounds fun and all, but what if it starts to become akward? i also tend to space out, my mind goes blank, and im only paying attention to the ...
A. 14 February 2011: Whats wrong with the way you react? If you space out and enjoy the sex then isn't that just the purpose of the roleplay to begin with? To have great sex?
Don't worry so much, just tell your boyfriend he gives you so much pleasure you want to ... (read in full...)
Is my vagina broken?
Q. This is rather embarrassing but i'm not sure what to think of this ... so me and my bf of a year have been trying new things in the bedroom relentless to say i don't know why but i don't like it when he goes down on me ....i know its weird but for ...
A. 14 February 2011: 1. women are all different. Some take longer to orgasm, some don't at all, and some know their own body so amazingly well they can come almost by mere thought.
2. how will the guy know if he's doing it right or wrong when you fake it? Stop the faki... (read in full...)
Are my standards too high to get a girlfriend?`
Q. Hello all, I'm a seventeen (Virgin) year old boy. I do want a girlfriend but I'm worried that my standards are too high. I don't believe in ANY sexual contact whatsoever, I wouldn't date a female if she had voluntarily given her virginity away o...
A. 14 February 2011: Yes, they are not only high, they are also unrealistic. People are not produced in a factory and can be bought in the store for a fixed price. People are individuals, they will have history, personal ideas about what is right or wrong, experiences, ... (read in full...)
I'm scared to sleep with other people!
Q. I have recently broken up with a guy I have been seeing for 3 years. He is the only person i've had sex with and i'm scared to sleep with other people. Is this normal? I still feel like he is the only person I want to sleep with even though I don't ...
A. 14 February 2011: You recently broke up with this guy, who's telling you you need to jump in bed with another man already? Don't force yourself to anything.
You recently came out of a relationship with someone else, that is why you are feeling all these things. ... (read in full...)
How to tell a girl you're dating that you're a virgin?
Q. Hi, I'm a 27 years old guy and I have never had sex in my life. It's an bothering fact especially when you live among people for whom it's no big deal to have sex from younger ages. The reason i haven't had sex so far may sound stupid but it's alw...
A. 14 February 2011: If you are not already dating her then don't tell her. Once you get into a relationship with a girl, and she becomes the person that you'd like to have sex with, then you tell her. You don't tell her sooner.
Once you have gotten into a relation... (read in full...)
I don't like the way my boyfriend didn't understand how much trouble I went to for him!
Q. am I stupid to be upset about this? So yesterday my boyfriend and I celebrated our Valentines day. I spent most of my paycheck to make it happen. As well as about 4 hours of my day preparing it. I made him a romantic Italian dinner. ...
A. 14 February 2011: It will still be classified as a communication error. You believe you had established a norm of always eating together. He broke that norm. You should talk about this, about why he broke the norm, or if he even was aware that you had established ... (read in full...)
I don't like the way my boyfriend didn't understand how much trouble I went to for him!
Q. am I stupid to be upset about this? So yesterday my boyfriend and I celebrated our Valentines day. I spent most of my paycheck to make it happen. As well as about 4 hours of my day preparing it. I made him a romantic Italian dinner. ...
A. 14 February 2011: He did take joy in the food you had made him. But why should he assume that just because there are leftovers he needs to eat the same thing every day until all the food is done? You had your celebration, and now it is over. But to you it appears to ... (read in full...)
Having trouble dealing with my dad's death...and my partner doesn't understand.
Q. Hi i recently lost my dad and it was a shock. I'm not dealing with this well at all and need to see a counselor. If this doesn't work i may need to go on to take anti-depressants as my doctor thinks i'm depressed. My partner does not understand and ...
A. 14 February 2011: It could be best that you take a break from your boyfriend. If you live together you could move to live with a friend, or your family and relatives for a while until you decide what to do. Talking to your counselor about this will help as well, to ... (read in full...)
What do I need to do to be accepted as a friend by this girl? She seems super resistant to me
Q. My boyfriend's circle of friends includes 3 other guys, and just 1 girl. I get along fantastically with all of the guys, however, the girl seems resistant to accept me, or be my friend. I get the feeling that she's jealous of me because she feel...
A. 14 February 2011: You can't force friendships. If you and her don't bond immediately then respect that and let it flow naturally. You simply can not be friends with everyone, especially if she's reluctant to make friends so fast. As long as you can get along and be ... (read in full...)
My fiance's parents aren't too thrilled about our announcement!
Q. I proposed to my same sex partner a while ago and she said yes. We are very excited and happy. I told my family who were really pleased and even more excited for us.We told my partners parents and they were not that pleased. Her mother cried( not ...
A. 14 February 2011: Oh, and congratulations! :D Best of luck, stay strong, and love each other!... (read in full...)
My fiance's parents aren't too thrilled about our announcement!
Q. I proposed to my same sex partner a while ago and she said yes. We are very excited and happy. I told my family who were really pleased and even more excited for us.We told my partners parents and they were not that pleased. Her mother cried( not ...
A. 13 February 2011: Support your partner, but stay calm and silent. Let her parents (or perhaps mother in particular) cry her tears and get it over with. You can suggest to your partner that she doesn't talk to her mother for a bit and see if she will calm down once ... (read in full...)
What should I take it to mean when a girl gets this close?
Q. I'm 20. What should I read into a girl's motivation and intentions and does it mean anything if a girl lies back onto my chest and starts rubbing my hair?...
A. 13 February 2011: It's called flirting and means she likes you. When a girl makes physical contact with you it means she likes you and is flirting with you. It could be a friendly flirt, or that she's just a very cuddly person. See if she does the same with all other ... (read in full...)
What do I need to do to be accepted as a friend by this girl? She seems super resistant to me
Q. My boyfriend's circle of friends includes 3 other guys, and just 1 girl. I get along fantastically with all of the guys, however, the girl seems resistant to accept me, or be my friend. I get the feeling that she's jealous of me because she feel...
A. 13 February 2011: How long have you and your boyfriend been together? This is a case that takes a long time. You will have to be patient with this girl and not try and force a friendship on her. That said, Im not sure why you want to be her friends so desperately ... (read in full...)
| *higirl's friends
These are mutual friends, so *higirl has
added them and they have added *higirl!
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![kitty-cat=] agony aunt](/avatars/4e276644-588c-43d2-bf37-fe35b92660b5.png){kind=small}
