| Latest articles: Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 June 2011: Lately, there have been a lot of posts relating to relationships that are going wrong because of Emotional Abuse (EA). There are often obvious signs of abuse such as shouting, use of cruel words, lack of love/affection, use of guilt etc. However, ...
Understanding Teenagers.
This question has 10 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
18 December 2010: We often see a lot of questions on Dear Cupid from parents trying to communicate or to make sense of their teenage children. I answered a question for a mother the other day, and was told that I should adapt it into an article (original thread ...
|
I am pregnant and my boyfriend can't marry me because it will break the other girl's heart
Q. hi everybody,i think you gyzs for all those good idvices and ideas that may lead my relationship.therefore,i have a problem and i need some advices from anyone who cares about my situation.this is my problem:i have been with my boyfriend for two ...
A. 15 February 2010: Seems to me that your parents are very concerned by his behaviour towards you to actually say they will help. I think you need to listen to them. ... (read in full...)
Our friend just got a new girlfriend and none of us like her!
Q. my best guy friend just got a new girl friend and none of our friends like her. she's just awful and she's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had.we all love him and would hate to see him get hurt. we were wondering if there was a way to break ...
A. 6 February 2010: You can't do anything. All you can do is wait for it to end and then be there for him when it does. People have to make their own mistakes to understand themselves. Let him make his mistake. ... (read in full...)
It's Friday night and here I am, alone again!
Q. It's friday night and I'm alone. I was at a friend's b-day earlier tonight. It seems like every night I'm alone. I like being to myself but this is getting ridiculous. When I was out at the restaurant I saw many cute girls out with guys. One of ...
A. 6 February 2010: You're not looking in the right places. If you have a hobby you really enjoy, join a club or something where other people are that you can meet them and make friends. ... (read in full...)
I'm 15 and we want to have a baby
Q. People are telling me i'm Crazy ! Im 15 and planning to have a baby ? My boyfriend and i been together for about 1 year and Two Months. He tells me he Loves me and he will never Leave me.We been having intercourse since we meet. Now we both want to ...
A. 6 February 2010: It's not as simple as having a baby. You then need to find $15,000 a year to support that baby, you need to make sure you have a safe home. You need to make sure you can provide it with a great education. This isn't just about having a baby. It#s ... (read in full...)
I am finding it hard to move on when she places all the blame on me for splitting up.
Q. recently broke it off with a long term girlfriend b/c of some big differneces we had been having..I broke it off 2 mo. I have been secretly hoping she would come back and haven't been in the best state of mind..I mailed a closure letter that stated ...
A. 5 February 2010: This letter says everything you need to know about this woman. She wanted all her own selfish fun without any responsibility. How selfish and pathetic of her to say you were all to blame. The explanation is that she was not ready in any way for any ... (read in full...)
It feels like there's something in between us, that I can't get close to him.
Q. hi, i live at uni in the same house as my boyfriend, we have been together for four months. just recently i have been feeling really down and have been told by a counciler that it is depression, but im not sure why but when i am with my bf it comes ...
A. 5 February 2010: This I think is to do with your depression as well. Perhaps you are feeling low and worry that his uni opportunities are becoming more important to him than you (a form of jealousy)? Perhaps he isn't supporting you enough? Yes, do talk to to him ... (read in full...)
He keeps coming in and out of my life...I don't know if I can get through this again!
Q. Hi, Ok so here goes. I was with a guy that i trully fell hard for, around Christmas time he messed me around and stood me up xmas eve when we were supposed to go to his mums, he just never called...there was a heated argument tears and and a ...
A. 5 February 2010: Stop letting him mess you around and cut all contact now. Then when he comes back, just continue to ignore him and stop contact. ... (read in full...)
I am expected to conduct myself a certain way but the rules do not apply to her.
Q. My wife and I have been together for almost 13 years. We married 2 years ago. My issue is the fact that the relationship is so onesided. I am expected to conduct myself a certain way but the rules do not apply to her. I am a clean freak and she is a ...
A. 5 February 2010: Move on, move on, move on. Seriously, why be unhappy with someone like this when there is clearly a better one out there. ... (read in full...)
Why does he say he is still in love with me and has had sex with both myself and a new woman ?
Q. why does my ex still call me and text me if he has a new relationship. why does he say he is still in love with me and has had sex with both myself and new woman (until i found out).He was trying to convince me that we are not over. why does he ...
A. 5 February 2010: Because he is still trying to use you. This time, when you cut contact and he comes around, tell him that you will get the police on him. ... (read in full...)
She said our friendship willbe over if I date a guy of a different race.
Q. Hi i really need advice here as my really close friend has turned round 2 me n sed our friendship is ova if i go out wid this lad (who is coloured) n i ment 2 b meetin him n he has sed that he really likes me n we have never met b4 jst come really ...
A. 5 February 2010: Your friend is either terribly jealous of you because she fancies him, or she is a racist. Either way, you don't need to crap friend like this in your life. ... (read in full...)
Is she just keeping me as a back up in case her other guy does not work out?
Q. theres a girl who said she liked me but wanted to wait till her head was in the right place for us to have a relationship, shes not talked about getting to gether and she keeps going to see other boys who like her. im pritty sure (her freinds told ...
A. 5 February 2010: You are well and truly second best here my friend. Best thing to do is move on and not give her another chance EVER. ... (read in full...)
When he's sober and calmed down from the drugs he makes me feel like the luckiest girl ever!
Q. I have bben with my boyfriend for some time now and nothings really has changed as far as i feel for him. I still get butterflies when i speak to him. hes the first real relationship ive had, and i love him a lot. ive made commitments and lets just ...
A. 5 February 2010: He's on drugs. He's drinking. He's talking to you about other women. He makes you feel unworthy. You are either deluding yourself that he is a nice guy, or your own esteem is sadly very low, because this guy just isn't worthy of you at all. Do you ... (read in full...)
He's always on his Xbox and when he's not, he's sleeping. I hardly see him anymore!
Q. hi, recently my boyfriend is acting strange, i dont know what too do, he's always on his xbox and when hes not he's sleeping, he hardly talks to me, hardly kisses me anymore, when he wants something thats when he comes across all nice and pays me ...
A. 5 February 2010: He's a young man. And this is how most young men behave. The truth is most young men are not really ready for real relationships, as they do not understand them. Your boyfriend does not understand the commitment he is supposed to have for you. ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him I think she has Narcissistic Personality Disorder? She's pregnant!
Q. Should I tell the husband of a friend I strongly suspect has Narcissistic Personality Disorder that I think she has the disorder? He and I had a past crush on each other and she knows this. She is 8 months pregnant with their 1st child. We all no ...
A. 5 February 2010: Do not tell him. He chose her, he must solve his own problems. If you get involved, you will be the one who is seen as the bad person and the home wrecker, which I know you don't want. If he chooses to stay in the marriage, then that is his choice ... (read in full...)
Why is my best friend being a prat?
Q. my best friend called me a boring skan.k cos i said i wont sleeping with strangers like her when we go on holiday. we were married on face book and i took it off..she said am pathetic.. and i just said i dont wanna be married..why can...
A. 5 February 2010: To be perfectly honest, this bears all the hallmarks of a girl who is so unhappy with her own life that the only way she can feel good is to take it out on you. She insults you because you won't sleep around,, she's childish about facebook and ... (read in full...)
Too close for comfort?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for about a year. I love him to death and I let him know it. We live together with my son from a previous relationship and he is an amazing father figure. But the re-occurring issue in our relationship is his ...
A. 5 February 2010: All his very callous responses, such as calling you silly, getting hostile and telling you that you're childish are a very good indication that he is still emotionally attached to her. So decide whether you want to be second best to him, or ... (read in full...)
Should I be worried about him?
Q. Hi, I have been wondering about my bf. Recently he has been so..... vacant, and I wonder if it is worth it, being with him I mean, for example; today I went up to him and said hi, I went to give him a hug (we did that a lot) but he totally backed o...
A. 5 February 2010: Yes. Either there is something wrong with him, or worse he is hiding something. I would suggest talking to him. ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is angry over my happy ending massages...
Q. I have been dating my new girlfriend for about 4 months now and things are going okay. Yesterday my g/f and I met a group of friends for drinks after work. One of my good friends got a little buzzed and he accidentally blurted out to everyone at ...
A. 5 February 2010: You're cheating. No wonder she's angry. ... (read in full...)
Why is he being like he's being? I've given him loads of chances.
Q. dated this guy for around two months then he had a few problems, family being ill and his grandpa died. i was sympathetic listened, lots of hugs. good shoulder. then didnt hear from him for a week, 2 weeks i did but only texts to explain why he ...
A. 5 February 2010: He's just not that bothered is he? You know it. You really do. A guy who is truly into you makes a huge amount of effort. This guy is just wasting your time. Leave him well alone. ... (read in full...)
I don't like my father's inappropriate behaviour! Should I be worried?
Q. I think my father is acting really weird. I've never been too close to him and whenever he wanted to kiss or hug me like my mother does, i silently rejected him because I didn't like it. That made him angry and we started to argue about unimportant ...
A. 5 February 2010: Be on your guard. People say trust your gut instinct, and your instinct says something is wrong. So be on your guard. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend keeps saying I cheated but I didn't! are we over?
Q. I let my boyfriend use my laptop he found some pictures of me and my friends haveing fun at homecoming when I studied abroad in college last year. Now all he keeps talking about is how I cheated on him which I really didnt. We were jsut posing in ...
A. 5 February 2010: Ask him why he doesn't trust you and listen carefully to him. Then, explain to him that you didn't cheat and go into depth about what happened. If after that he still accuses you, then you need to move on for your own sake. ... (read in full...)
How do you know when love can conquer all or when you have to call it quits?
Q. I have been struggling w/ my marriage and am in the process of getting a divorce. This is a painful decision, as I have two kids, but am not in love and have not been in a healthy marriage for years. During this process, my boss and I have become ...
A. 5 February 2010: Call it quits now. Love only conquers all when there is no wife involved. He has just used you as an escape from his marriage. If she ruins your life, you will have learned a painful but valuable lesson. Do not trust a married men who is willing to ... (read in full...)
Is he just kidding by saying I'm annoying?
Q. How would u know if your guy friend was kidding? He says that I'm annoying! Everytime we talk he says i'm not smart and i say hes a nerd. But i'm just kidding! He knows that I'm joking with him. How can i know he is? He smiles when he says i'm ...
A. 5 February 2010: It sounds like he likes you more than he wants to admit. If he was not joking, he would be far more vicious, and would certainly not smile at you. ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is cheating on me! Should I leave? or stay?
Q. hi, ive just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me. im unsure on what i should do. whever i should leave him or stay. please help... ...
A. 5 February 2010: Why not move on and find a better guy. It is clear he is not good enough. ... (read in full...)
I found condoms in my BF's car, but we don't use them!
Q. I need help!! I just found condoms in my b/f car. Thing is we dont usaully use condoms. (well we dont)The last time we had sex we did but just because my b.c was acting up but it is a diff brand that we used, then the ones I found. I have neve...
A. 5 February 2010: Chances are he is cheating, and that's why he was acting up last time around and has hidden condoms in the car. Get yourself checked for STD's. ... (read in full...)
I've just realised me and women see things differently
Q. I need some insight. From women especially...(guys feel free to share if it has happened to you...) It's a little long winded, I apologize for that but I want to be thorough. Here's my situation. I am engaged. Totally in love... My fiance and I...
A. 5 February 2010: There's something else bothering her. Maybe work or money problems or anything like that. Chances are it's not you. This is more about something bothering her, and you're the one who gets any backlash because you're the nearest to her. So the best ... (read in full...)
I am pregnant and my boyfriend can't marry me because it will break the other girl's heart
Q. hi everybody,i think you gyzs for all those good idvices and ideas that may lead my relationship.therefore,i have a problem and i need some advices from anyone who cares about my situation.this is my problem:i have been with my boyfriend for two ...
A. 5 February 2010: I'm sorry, but there is something seriously wrong here. No man would refuse to marry you because it would break another girl's heart. Either he loves her, or he just isn't ready for marriage at all. ... (read in full...)
She has stopped communicating, and I don't know what to do
Q. Here's my dilemma: This girl and I agreed to get to know each other before we jump into a relationship. She had just gotten out of one when we had told each other that we really liked each other and we shared a kiss and affection (but we didn't go ...
A. 5 February 2010: That has the word 'rebound' written all over it. Your male friends are right I think. She has used you to get over the pain of her ex. Either she has no more pain or she has gone back to the ex. Listen to your male friends and move on.... (read in full...)
I think she may be mentally unwell, but the police say just stay away
Q. hi im robby, i shall begin with my question and then explain some what would all you out there do ? how would you handle or deal with my situation ? i met a beautiful woman approx 2 years ago, during this time together we have shared all th...
A. 5 February 2010: Yes, walk away, no matter how painful. If she has problems that cause her to get the police to call on you, then the safest option you have is to walk away. ... (read in full...)
I want a sex with no strings attached relationship
Q. I am not at all ready for a new relationship. I think it could be years before I want to get into something serious again (long story). So I'm wondering lately (because I love sex) if it would be a good idea to find someone who wants a purely sexual ...
A. 5 February 2010: The only real worry so long as you're safe is that you either end up falling for the guy and end up hurt, or you end up feeling used. ... (read in full...)
7 years, now long distance. He says we should see other people. Help!
Q. Boyfriend and I have been trying to get work in another state. He just informed me he got a high paying job in the state where we both have talked of going. He said he's going to look for a place there this weekend. He also said that we should see ...
A. 4 February 2010: I think this is his way of saying that it's over. No easy way to say it, but I think it's over. You would do better to move on.... (read in full...)
He took the condom off and then fingered me. Could I be pregnant?
Q. My boyfriend and i have had sex about 3 times now,and one of the times after we were done he took off the condom and then fingered me a little later, i asked him if he had any semen on his hands and he said that he whiped it off, so he thought. Well ...
A. 4 February 2010: There is always a chance if he had sperm on his hands. Maybe go to a doctor if you're really worried.... (read in full...)
He said he was dating to teach his ex girlfriend a lesson. Where does that leave me?
Q. Hi guys. I really like this guy and we've been out a few times but he is still in touch with his GF and I recently found out that he decided to start dating as a 'payback' (according to him) to 'teach her a lesson' for some lie or other she told ...
A. 4 February 2010: Bid Red Flags here. Divorced once because he fell out of love, he has an ex he doesn't love because of her weight. Now he blames his impotence on her (which isn't true.) And he says he's dating to get his own back. Four good reasons to get away from ... (read in full...)
Should we rekindle a first love?
Q. I have just met up again with my first love, Matt, who I went out with for 3 years, 18 years after we parted ways. In all that time, even through my past marriage, I never stopped thinking about him and all of the "what ifs". Last year, we got back ...
A. 4 February 2010: If you're both single now, you have nothing to lose by trying. It's worth getting rid of that 'what if'. ... (read in full...)
Is my friend telling the truth? Is she pregnant with my BF's baby?
Q. Hi Iv Got A Big Problem. Im 18 Years Old Iv Been With My Boyfriend For 3 Years Now And We're Engaged And We Were Trying For A Baby. But... I Got A Text From A Old Friend Who I Blamed My Boyfriend For Cheating On Me With Her He Claimed It Was Just A ...
A. 4 February 2010: He certainly could be. The chances of her lying are low since she must understand a DNA test can be done. That's the only way to be sure... (read in full...)
My BF thinks my friend's a slut and doesn't want me hanging out with her.
Q. One of my oldest friends asked me to hang out this afternoon. I haven't seen her in a while, so I was excited to see her. However, I know my boyfriend doesn't like me hanging out with her. We're both very insecure people, let me elaborate. The ...
A. 4 February 2010: Too controlling, too immature, too insecure. That's your boyfriend. He won't change either. The best thing you can do is get him out of your life. Don't allow yourself to be treated poorly this way. ... (read in full...)
Both guys are cheaters, should I just get myself a new love?
Q. Hi i just got back with my ex about a mouth ago and he's in the army but i know that he have girls calling his phone and all way walking away when i am around.... Now my other ex boyfriend wants to get back with me and he cheated on me to many times ...
A. 4 February 2010: They're both ex's, and both cheaters. Find a good guy to have kids with and a future with instead. Don't settle for any tin can men. ... (read in full...)
I believe he has changed, but my mother says he is a jerk!
Q. Hi I am 18 years old My boyfriend is 24 We first started dating when I was only 13 After almost five years together He changed and I knew something was wrong I kind of knew he was cheating I believe that us women just know that kind of things we get ...
A. 4 February 2010: Wake up. He cheated on you and had a baby with another woman. He doesn't love you, and your mother is right. He is a jerk. Let's face it, he deserted this other woman and the baby. ... (read in full...)
We talk a lot and have sex but he doesn't want me for a girlfriend
Q. I'ev been talking too this dude for 8months now. I like him alot and we spend a geat amount of time together i see him about 3 time or more durin a weekday and we see each other every weekend. He is the only dude I have sex with, and over the ...
A. 4 February 2010: He's there for the sex and nothing else. You are sadly mistaken if you think he is going to be romantic. He cares only for the sex, and that's it. If you're looking for more, move on. ... (read in full...)
He says he has stopped talking to his ex but they are best friends, it drives me crazy
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost a year. He still talks to his ex-girlfriend. They've been apart for years now and she also has a boyfriend. I know he has no feelings for her and I know he loves me, but it still makes me feel ...
A. 4 February 2010: I'm not a fan of ex's keeping in contact. As far as I'm concerned,an ex is the past and it's best to move on. I think you did do the right thing, because to be that close to an ex is a little worrying. ... (read in full...)
Boy, revenge is sweet...
Q. Hi, my wife recently cheated on me with a guy who lives in a small town about 10 miles away from me, anyway to cut a long story short I found everything out, confronted my wife and then I confronted the guy in question and gave him the mandotary ...
A. 4 February 2010: You can get arrested for harassment and defamation of character. And also, hate to tell you this, but it was your wife who cheated on you, not him. ... (read in full...)
I need to know how I can find out how he feels about me.
Q. Hi am looking for some advice. I am a 27 year old Single mum of 1 and I met a 24 year old guy about 6 months ago. We work together and get on really well. In the last few months we have been flirting etc and about 2 weeks ago as we were dancing at a ...
A. 4 February 2010: Well if he's very slow to make a move, it's less likely he's there to just use you. I think you need to continue to get to know him, meet with him and just talk. Get to know him, make sure you like him and make sure he's a good guy, and if he's ... (read in full...)
| *aringGuy's friends
These are mutual friends, so *aringGuy has
added them and they have added *aringGuy!
|
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png){kind=small}
