| Latest articles: Subtle Signs of Emotional Abuse
This question has 11 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
12 June 2011: Lately, there have been a lot of posts relating to relationships that are going wrong because of Emotional Abuse (EA). There are often obvious signs of abuse such as shouting, use of cruel words, lack of love/affection, use of guilt etc. However, ...
Understanding Teenagers.
This question has 10 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
18 December 2010: We often see a lot of questions on Dear Cupid from parents trying to communicate or to make sense of their teenage children. I answered a question for a mother the other day, and was told that I should adapt it into an article (original thread ...
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Does he like me? Does the way he ends our conversations mean anything?
Q. Hey. I’ve been msning a guy at my college for well over a year. I know him in person, it’s just that we’re both too shy to talk! And I fancy him. Last year, after certain conversations he’d add xx when he left. I never did because I was confused...
A. 10 April 2010: It might do. But like you, he might not have a clue how you feel because neither of you are actually talking about it. One of yoou needs to be brave here. And since you're the one asking for advice, I'll suggest you do it! Talk to him, tell him how ... (read in full...)
Is he into me? Or is he just using me?
Q. hello im gracie and my first time writing on hear so hope im doing this right:) I dont really no whats going on with me at the moment, i meet this guy get on well, and have slept with him twice, but i still dont really no where i stand, He was ...
A. 10 April 2010: The problem is that you had sex too quickly without really getting to know what he wanted. You need to know where you stand before you do all this. Because now, it really does appear as if he's just using you. All those things that you listed are ... (read in full...)
How do I go about not falling for his games?
Q. If a man plays games with you and you know that he really likes you what should you do? Example he says he will call you the next day but then doesnt as he is expecting then for you to get in touch with him. How is the best way to respond to this ...
A. 10 April 2010: Cut him out. Seriously, when a man likes a woman that much, he does't play games. He does what he can to get your attention. If a man says he will call, and then doesn't, then give him a chance. If he continues (as your guy is), he's not worth the ... (read in full...)
Why did he forward an email to his son to me?
Q. My married online BF of 4 yrs and I had a big fight and I ended my relationship with him. Worst of all, his son and wife knew about my illicit affair with him, an emotional affair, and for the past 6 months we don't have communication. Yesterday...
A. 10 April 2010: Could have been a mistake. Whatever it was, do not respond to it. Accept it was just a mistake and leave him and remain cut from his life.... (read in full...)
Sometimes boyfriend is sweet but other times he makes me want to cry
Q. Sometimes I feel like my boyfriend doesn't really love me. He's sweet and everything, but sometimes, he's just criticizing things like my driving (its not bad, he just has been driving longer than me and is better than i am and expects me to be like ...
A. 10 April 2010: This is where the emotional abuse starts. He's 'sweet and caring', but also hurts you a great deal. In other words, he is controlling you. He tells you what you want to hear at times to make you feel good and stay with him, then treats you like ... (read in full...)
Yeast infection now complicated because period started
Q. Hey everyone, lets say my name is Cindy. Ok so i had this bad smelling itching problem down in my private part and i went to the doctor and turns out i have a vaginal yeast infection. The doctor gave me some tubes of cream that i had to stick in my ...
A. 10 April 2010: Go back to the doctor and ask him. I'm sure there are people on here who can help, but the doctor is the best person to talk to about this.... (read in full...)
My friends aren't loyal
Q. I had this best friend for about the past 8 years. She started being rude and two faced and she started hanging out with the "popular/known" group. Eventually we had lost our closeness and she was ditching me. My friend then developed an attitude ...
A. 10 April 2010: Because you are a loyal, nice, lovely person. And people like you attract people like them because you represent a sort of stability they don't have. Don't stop being loyal and lovely, because there are some good people out there who will make ... (read in full...)
Should I go there or would it be unwise?
Q. there is this guy i might be into he is 8 years older then me please help theres this guy i've known because he is my sisters husbands friend he always gets me into this night club that you have to be 18 to get in..and he is super nice one night m...
A. 10 April 2010: Realistically, you're fancying a bad boy who will probably end up using you, like he has those other girls. The last thing you need is to be used for sex and that's it. It will hurt you. I think this is a guy you don't need to have anything to do ... (read in full...)
I had everything I ever wanted but now she wants to leave...
Q. hi dear cupid... i have a few questions that i need help with, i got back from work yesterday and my partner of two years told me that she was not happy with me and wants to break up with me and said that i have two weeks to find somewhere to live, ...
A. 10 April 2010: I agree with the post below. This could be (and sounds like) post natal depression. It will be very hard for you to talk to her about it, but you must try. Also, if you can talk to her family, it might be worth it. Start there and see if that gets ... (read in full...)
Can I make him forget about them and come back to me?
Q. I'm going to visit my ex boyfriend to win him back. He's dating new girls, and i'm not sure how long, so i'm going in a month to see him. He said nothing has gotten serious yet, but that when I see him he can't promise we'll hook up but it will be ...
A. 10 April 2010: I think this is such a bad idea. He's dating other women, you intend to see him and all he can say is that he can't promise you'll hook up, but it will be hard to resist. So basically he'll have sex with you and use you, then decide that he can't be ... (read in full...)
Its my life and I should get to be in control? So why is he the one calling the shots?
Q. Hi, Following a recent break-up,my ex has been calling and getting in touch with me. We're friends but with the conversations I get annoyed because it seems that he still has control over me, or believes that he does and I need to stop it. Shou...
A. 10 April 2010: I think you would be best to cut all contact. Sometimes you have to make a cleat statement to someone to make your point heard, and this is one of those times.... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend using me financially?
Q. hi all heres the thing my bf i think is using me see when i met him he wasnt working and been going around looking for work and things . anyway hes getting benifits and things and just well when he gets paided he will spend it so quickly like in ...
A. 10 April 2010: I'd say that this is a man you need to avoid. There are some great guys who maybe don't get a break and don't have the money. But this guy is just spending then expecting you to pick up the tab. He even had the nerve to throw it all back on your ... (read in full...)
Can skipping pills leave me at risk of pregnancy?
Q. Ive recently started the pill and have been really good untill this week, Ive missed 3 days of the pill, and today i had sex where he cum inside me, yeah i have taken the pill 2day as i remembered, but is there still a chance that i could get preg...
A. 10 April 2010: Yes, it certainly can. Don't skip of forget.... (read in full...)
Should I tell him now or at the prom that I really don't like him?
Q. This guy asked me to prom a few weeks ago now but I pretended that I'd promised to go with my friends. I really don't like this guy like that or in any way really but because as my friends say, I'm to nice for my own good I agreed to dance with him ...
A. 10 April 2010: Do it before the prom. If you do it at the prom, it won't look good for you. ... (read in full...)
Should I let him finger me?
Q. hi umm i need help this boy wants to finger mii weve recently dated nd recently brokeup...now he wants to finger mii but im reallly scared can u guys/girls help mii...
A. 10 April 2010: You're broken up for a start, and the fact that you're asking this is perhaps an indication that you're not ready yet. Don't just let this guy use you. You deserve better than that. ... (read in full...)
How do I get noticed?
Q. So, I decided I want to do something with my life. People always say "anything is possible" and "chase your dream." And I've decided I want to. I want to be a model, and my sister used to be when she was younger. She went to John Casablanca's and I ...
A. 9 April 2010: If you want to be a model, have some professional photos taken and send them to agents or competitions. Also, enter beauty competitions where you can be noticed as well. Be prepared that it is a huge amount of work and commitment, and it may take ... (read in full...)
Do we all find happiness and true love?
Q. do we all find happiness and true love?xxx...
A. 9 April 2010: Some people do, some people don't. The key thing to remember is that love isn't something that just happens and stays there. It takes effort and commitment, and if one person in a couple isn't willing to put either of those two things in, then it ... (read in full...)
He's got a gorgeous girlfriend but I want him!
Q. MOD NOTE: Poster stated they are 13, but it says 30 in age. I'm 13 years old and I have noticed I have turned bi-sexual and I an deeply in love with a 14 year old boy. I would die for him I feel there is a connection between us, but he's scared t...
A. 9 April 2010: Sorry, but you're reading way too much into this. He has a girlfriend, so in the interests of decency, don't get involved. Plus if you come out to him and there is no connection, you'll look back for trying to split them up. ... (read in full...)
Would handsome Hollywood ask out normal pretty girl or woman who is not actress
Q. i have fairy tale question would Hollywood actor go out with normal average pretty girl or woman real or would prefer Hollywood actress who is fake and plastic or real person...
A. 9 April 2010: Not my name is right. I'll add that James Steward and James Cagney were both married to one woman each all their lives. And there are plenty of others who have as well. ... (read in full...)
I've dated all kinds of people, but I can't find Mr Right!
Q. Dear cupid, I dont understand what I'm doing wrong or if anything at all. I know what I am attracted to but it seems that every time I get involved with some one I get let down each time worse than the time before. Then I see my relatives and frie...
A. 9 April 2010: You're looking to hard. Men are not stupid and are actually more perceptive than they seem. To me, you come across as a girl who is trying too hard, and to a man that can be scary. so relax a little bit more, and instead of dating loads of guys, sit ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got another girl pregnant!
Q. I am going through a really hard time and im looking for some guidance or advice. im sorry if my questions seem all over the place but here i go. I have been dating my boyfriend since march of 2007... we have been through so much togethor and that...
A. 9 April 2010: Just leave. You can't trust, him, it's not working out and if he's having a baby with another woman, you'll never again be the priority in his life. Just leave him.... (read in full...)
Why is he so hard on me? It is not my fault my tax refund has not come.
Q. This may seem like a really stupid scenerio but here goes.... This has been going on for months. Im in a long distance relationship for several years. I am a single mom and I lost my job back in december of 09. I have been struggling for m...
A. 9 April 2010: Dump him. He's after the money. That's all.... (read in full...)
I'm cheating with my girlfriends best friend.
Q. I've been cheating on girlfriend and feel so bad. Its about a million times worse because I'm doing it with her best friend. The fact that she cheated on me a few months ago isn't making me feel better. Me and my girlfriend have been going out for ...
A. 9 April 2010: If you've only been going out for 9 months and you're both cheating on each other, then end it and move on now. This is a dead relationship. ... (read in full...)
Leaving for the Navy, ... but my girlfriend wants to get married before I go.
Q. Hi, I am 23 yrs old, and have been with my girlfriend for about 3 1/2 years now. This isnt including a period of time we were broken up for about 6 months about a year ago. Anyway during this period of singleness, I enlisted in the US Navy. Th...
A. 9 April 2010: Slow right down. The Army girlfriend below has it right. These marriages can last, but only if both are truly committed. You and your girlfriend were having serious problems before and that's why you split. But now you've got back together, and ... (read in full...)
B/f accused me of saying he's a player and now doesn't want to see me!
Q. I am a bit confused and need some advice. I am in along distance exclusive relationship. I was talking to my boyfriend during the day .he stated he was just going to go home from work and clean up the house a little. Later that nite i texted him ...
A. 9 April 2010: His seriously over the top reaction suggests he is up to no good. But rather than come clean and admit that he is a cheating ass who is a liar, he chose to blame you because it takes away the fact he is basically a rubbish man. Yes, he's cheating. ... (read in full...)
Single, involved with a married man and know its going nowhere
Q. I am single and seeing a married man who is my colleague (from different department) of 2 years for more than a year now. We are professionals from the same country and working in a foreign country. At the beginning we were just friends. We hung out ...
A. 9 April 2010: You need to stop this affair. This will never go anywhere. You know he is a cheater and is just using you for sex. He's only nice to get you into bed. That's it. Every time you sleep with this guy, you're disrespecting his poor wife (who has clearly ... (read in full...)
Should I see this married man or wait and see what happend with his wife first?
Q. this is a question that i really need answered. i went out with this guy about 16 years ago. for reasons we lost each other. about 10 years ago we found each other. and we were very to have. then about 6 months after that we lost touch again. we ...
A. 9 April 2010: You don't truly know anything about their marriage. He could be lying to get you into bed. Be realistic. You've surely heard all those stories about mistresses waiting for their lovers to get a divorce, and surprise surprise, they don't. This is a ... (read in full...)
How can I have him choose me over his ex?
Q. We met and have been together since the day we met. We both agree there was an instant connection between us and decided we wouldn't rush things and give our relationship the titles boyfriend girl girlfriend. That was 10 months ago. We don't really ...
A. 9 April 2010: There is nothing you can do. Only he can get over her, and he has to do it alone. Whether you say with him knowing that you're not his number 1 is another thing. It might be worth thinking about a break so he can work it out for himself. ... (read in full...)
Yeast infection on penis now peeling! HELP!
Q. Help! Earlier in the week I had a yeast infection on my penis (yes guys get them too). I have had it once before and had read that diluted tea tree oil can help clear it up. I diluted it but not enough and afterwards it sort of burnt. Good news...
A. 9 April 2010: Go to the doctor ASAP. It could be a reaction or something. ... (read in full...)
I opened up a little book of hers and started reading about her past...
Q. I am 18 years old and i met the most amazing girl about 7 months ago. About 2 months into our relationship we decided to have a child together, our parents know and we have talked it through. However she has been sexually promiscuous in the past ...
A. 9 April 2010: I don't think this is a girl you should be with. To bring a child into this world with her while she has acted the way she has done would serve only to make things worse. The situation is that this girl can't be trusted. If I were you, I would call ... (read in full...)
When should I take the pregnancy test?
Q. It had been 33 days since my last period. I don't know whether I'm pregnant or not. Can I go for pregnancy test or shall I wait for few more days. When will be good time to have test. Please help...
A. 9 April 2010: Best thing to do it take a test and see what happens. ... (read in full...)
I'm about to get caught out for lying to my girlfriend.
Q. I'm going to make this short, Recently I told my girlfriend I've been going to Painting class when I have really been drinking with my friends and just doing guy stuff, Anyhow She wants too see some of my work, Well I cant paint at all, I See this ...
A. 9 April 2010: I'll be honest, you're well and truly in for it here. You have to come clean and whatever she says, you accept with grace and then make it up to her Why was it that you lied in the first place?... (read in full...)
I don't enjoy being unfaithful to my boyfriend but I cant stop seeing my cousin!
Q. Hi All, I have been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for eight years and we have a daughter who is three years old. I am comfortable with my life with my boyfriend and I do care for him, however I am not in love with him. Recently...
A. 9 April 2010: Seeing a cousin isn't incest. Incest is with a direct relative (parent/child/sibling). But it's important the OP leaves her boyfriend, whether he is the father or not, so he is able to move on. There is no use in her staying if she's just going to ... (read in full...)
I can't stand his "been there, done that" attitude!
Q. I've been with my bf for over 3 years and we are living together almost 2. a couple of weeks ago i casually brought up the topic of kids , i said that this was something that i was starting to think about as i have just turned 35. he was horrified ...
A. 8 April 2010: Move on right NOW. If you are looking for children and commitment, you are with the wrong man. He is not interested at all in kids or anything more serous that what you have together at the moment.... (read in full...)
Should I let my boyfriend go out for drinks with his clingy ex booty call?
Q. So here's my issue ... my boyfriend has this girl Wendy who still keeps in contact with him. The very first night we went out, she was blowing up his cell phone with phone calls and texts like "please come over" "make love to me" "i need you" "i ...
A. 8 April 2010: To be honest, given their history I would be a little concerned too. I suggest you tell him that you feel uncomfortable about it, and if he asked you to come along, then do just that. ... (read in full...)
Passion!
Q. This guy I've known for a year, has recently been flirting with me. He is younger, and at first I shrug it off and enjoyed the attention! But then I started to feel attracted to him and made it known, which I think kind of scared him a little bit. ...
A. 8 April 2010: Before you do anything else, you need to get to know him more to find out what he is like in terms of actual personality. I would suggest seeing if he is interested in dating (if you're interested), and not just sex. ... (read in full...)
I can't be completely happy in the relationship I am in now because I feel like I can't let go of my ex.
Q. My ex boyfriend has a drug problem and he broke up with me because of it almost a year ago. I am still having a hard time moving on and still love him. I feel like if I move on I am abandoning him and everyone else in his life has given up on him. ...
A. 8 April 2010: The one thing everyone who has a partner who has problems hopes is that they will change. And it's the one thing that rarely happens. I'm sure you've heard the saying 'change comes from within'? Well it applies here, very much so. No matter how much ... (read in full...)
Should I ask out this girl on my route?
Q. There is this girl on my delivery route I want to ask out. Here is the deal. I only see her if I am there at certain times of the day, so not everyday. When we do see each other she is always makeing extended eye contact and smileing etc. We s...
A. 8 April 2010: I agree with the post below. It's worth a try!... (read in full...)
Should I invite him to my party?
Q. I'm having a birthday party in the summer and I want to invite this guy that I have liked since the beginning of the school year. He has a girlfriend and they have been going out for a couple of months. I don't think they will be together though ...
A. 8 April 2010: He has a girlfriend, so realistically this isn't a good idea if you're hoping to make a move on him. He will either bring her, which will prove he's not interested, or he won't bring her and you'll say something and he'll turn you down. I think you ... (read in full...)
My ex wants me to give him his Christmas presents otherwise I have to give my gifts back! What can I do?
Q. Heyy everyone, bit of a problem.. Right, me and my boyfriend broke up like three months ago, just after christmas and before new year, which wasnt good really, great start to the new year ey :) Anyway, he gave me his gift just before christmas...
A. 8 April 2010: The gift is yours to keep, and you don't have to give it back. And you don't have to give him his gift either. And to be honest, I wouldn't. I'd stop speaking to this guy and just cut him out.... (read in full...)
I don't enjoy being unfaithful to my boyfriend but I cant stop seeing my cousin!
Q. Hi All, I have been in a relationship with my current boyfriend for eight years and we have a daughter who is three years old. I am comfortable with my life with my boyfriend and I do care for him, however I am not in love with him. Recently...
A. 8 April 2010: Leave your boyfriend, let it settle for a few months, then go back to the cousin. But please leave your boyfriend so he can find someone who does love him. ... (read in full...)
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