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... Send *SA a private message | | | *SA's profile:I'm a professional dreamer and believer.. that love is worth fighting for. I believe in giving chances, especially to the one least worthy. We may be disappointed in the outcome and think we've wasted that chance, but you never know, somewhere down the road, your love may be remembered. Never give up on someone and never give up on a relationship... not until you've tried and tried and tried again.
True love never comes easy... it must be fought for and worked on. Hold on to your dreams and believe in love... it will take you far!
I've only been a member of this community for about two years. I truly love and appreciate all the members and their insight. This place is awesome!
When I first joined this community I was heart broken over a guy who chose to cut contact with me over something silly. Thanks to a special member, ShareBear, who stayed with me every step of the way, I was able to get over the heart break and love myself again.
Now, when I have a chance, I come back to help with questions and from time to time post a question of my own too! |
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I asked my crush if he had someone and he said no but his facebook shows otherwise. Do I let him know?
Q. I asked my crush months ago, did he have a gf, wife etc he said no, well I go on facebook and see a pic of him and his g/f (based off the comments, its his g/f)....dated 12/17/2014......now as of now, me and him are still talking and getting to know ...
A. 26 May 2015: Well... it may be that they've already broken up.. The picture was dated 6 months ago.
Why not send him a friend request on Facebook? It's natural to be Facebook friends since you are both on friendly terms. Then once added, you can ask him.
Or... (read in full...)
Should I allow my boyfriend to keep his ex in his life?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly three years but I don't think we should be together anymore. I've tried to end things on a few occasions lately but I can never just stick to my guns and cut all ties with him. I did love him a lot at one...
A. 26 May 2015: I rarely advise a break up.. but in this case, I think you should just leave this relationship and find someone who truly cares and loves you.
He's cheating and lying and immature. He's been like this and done it time and time again. It won't chan... (read in full...)
My sister slept with the guy I liked and she knew I liked him!
Q. Hi hope you can help me out , I've liked this lad for a few years he used to come into where I worked and I used to see him on the weekends at the pub he's slept over mine a few times and we've kissed but I'd just split up with my boyfrien...
A. 26 May 2015: Your sister is blood. This guy is nothing. If he reslly was interested in you, he would not have slept with your sister. Forget him, there are better men out there.... (read in full...)
Do we have a chance of making this relationship work?
Q. I have been going out with my boyfriend for 9 months now. We are both introverts and both don't find it easy opening up to other people. A few days ago, we woke up one morning and unexpectedly from nowhere he said he wanted to talk about our rela...
A. 26 May 2015: You should not have to 'make an effort' to love each other. It should be a natural Chemistry.. no effort needed to feel that attraction to each other. Isn't that why you both started dating? Because of your attraction towards each other? 9 months t... (read in full...)
Girlfriend and I fought and haven't spoken in a week. We are playing the waiting game but what should I do?
Q. I have been dating my gf for over 3 years now and she accompanied me to the hospital so I could update my hospital card. She said that the office to update my card closes at 4 but when we arrived she pointed out that they close at 3. I innocently ...
A. 26 May 2015: During the 3 years you and your GF were together, you both must have built up a lot of anger and resentment towards each other. This is why you both are easily angered over little things like this.
Seems you have lost the love and patience for one ... (read in full...)
We've been dating for 3 months but he never wants to call or text?
Q. I need help. I am dating someone who never calls me and rarely texts me. We have been dating for 3 months, and he says that he wants to "take things slow." Is this normal? I am all for not rushing into things, but wouldn't a guy want to talk to ...
A. 11 May 2015: How are you communicating if you both are not calling each other or texting? Do you spend a lot of time in person?... (read in full...)
Been dating for 2 years. I'm 19, so why are my parents being so weird about me having sex with my Bf?
Q. I am a 19 year old female and I've recently have been having sex with my boyfriend of 2 years. I lost my virginity to him. Yes, we are being safe and using both birth control and condoms. My parents recently found out because I have been spendi...
A. 10 May 2015: I'm sorry but you're not going to like this... Ouch.. When I read "I mean it's just sex"... It's so much more than JUST SEX. I understand how you feel that at age 19 you are already an adult and if you want to have sex, you should be able to witho... (read in full...)
Our three-year anniversary is a week from now and I need some ideas!
Q. I need some ideas for a 3 year anniversary date and possibly a gift I could make for my girlfriend. I spoil her endlessly year round because she is my princess and when things like anniversaries come up I like to come up with more memorable dates ...
A. 8 May 2015: Well, it's been three years... maybe it's time to 'remind' her of how you both met.
Take her back to the place where you both met.. bring back some of those sweet memories. :)... (read in full...)
Is it inappropriate for my boyfriend to give his number to other women?
Q. Is it appropriate for my boyfriend to continuously accept other girls numbers and/or give his number out to other women? I'm in a long term relationship and I've noticed that my boyfriend has done this several times through out the course of ou...
A. 8 May 2015: I think every relationship is different.
It is up to YOU to tell your boyfriend whether you feel comfortable with him giving his number out to other females.
My boyfriend's didn't appreciate him giving out his phone number or instant message ... (read in full...)
Am I too young for the girl I think I love
Q. Basically I'm a teenage lad, and I don't want people to just brush this off because I'm so young. I've recently broken up with my girlfriend of 2 years, because I cheated, for the SECOND time. We first started dating and everything was fine, about 9 ...
A. 8 May 2015: I know someone who was in the exact same situation as you when he was your age. He cheated time and time again on the nicest, sweetest, smartest girl who loved him so so much. He said he will never forget how much he hurt her. He was too young... ... (read in full...)
If we can't be honest then why are we dating?
Q. So I have been seeing this guy for a few months and things are okay. He seems to do more with his friends then with me. We won't talk or text for a full day then out of the blue he'll text me and want to hang out. We'll hang out then he'll casually ...
A. 8 May 2015: A guy's dream is to have a part time girlfriend. Someone they can be lovey dovey and go on dates with when they are in the mood for that. When they are not in the mood to have a girlfriend around, they want to live the 'single life' and hang out... (read in full...)
I end it but then take him back. I'm tired of playing this game!
Q. I am living a very unhealthy relationship, i have been with my boyfriend for nearly a year, he is with me but he is not! he is here but he is not ! Our relationship was great during the first 8 months, but since 3 months he became another person! ...
A. 8 May 2015: You said yourself you are tired of playing this game. Then why are you still in it? You are trying to find a reason where maybe the reason doesn't exist. Everything is always new and good in the beginning of a relationship. You can't get enough... (read in full...)
I hated my job so I quit and now my husband is very unhappy with me
Q. hello everyone , it's been a while since I have been here.... I have got married recently and I was so happy to finally find the man of my dreams ... but couples' real life is a entire different thing that what I've expected... We have money diffi...
A. 8 May 2015: I would suggest talking or writing him a letter letting him know how unhappy you were at the job. Let him know you've tried your very best but just could not keep the job.
At the same time, look for something else. Try signing up with job agen... (read in full...)
I feel like my boyfriend is crossing boundaries in helping his female friend. Do I have a right to be concerned?
Q. Here's my situation. My boyfriend has been helping his female friend for the past week or so because she is going through a break up and child custody issues. Which is fine except I feel like he's crossing boundaries a little bit. He's been talk...
A. 8 May 2015: Why not offer your support to this female friend of his?
Something I've learned from my boyfriend is that when a friend (male or female) needs his support, that he really appreciates it if I care as well. It can be simply asking if there's anyt... (read in full...)
What should I say or do, how can I recover this relationship?
Q. my boyfriend has been busy for the last 2 weeks and didn't have the time to meet me or talk to me ! he was able to see me for 30 minutes only during the last 2 weeks ! i felt that he is ignoring me ! i was so lonely and i felt that i waited t...
A. 3 May 2015: To be honest, both are at fault here.
If he had told you that he will be busy during a specific period of time, you should allow him the time and space to do what he needed to do. It was wrong for you to be upset and upset to the point you'd get ... (read in full...)
I'm pissed that I told my BF I missed him in a text and he did not bother to reply back!I'm pissed that I told my BF I missed him in a text and he did not bother to reply back!
Q. Why does it bother me so much that I sent my boyfriend a text saying "Have a good night. Miss you." And nothing. No response. No "I miss you too." It was five hours ago. He was out with his family for dinner and texted me to touch base. I texted ...
A. 3 May 2015: You are overreacting! Calm down!
I agree with the previous responses. Your BF might've read that as your response to him and didn't think he needed to reply.
The bigger issue here is your insecurity in the relationship or your BF.
This some... (read in full...)
He's younger and broke!
Q. Hey, I'm 25 years old and I am currently in grad school. I met this guy a year ago, because he worked at the restaurant across from my job and he delivered my food. We also have a mutual friend. We never talked then because he had a gir...
A. 30 April 2015: I've read your post and your follow ups. I understand you are concerned about whether he may be using you physically and/or financially. My answer to that is, it's too soon to tell as you have not gone on a date where money was involved and have not... (read in full...)
How do I cope with this breakup?
Q. My boyfriend of 3 years finished with me and is now in a relationship with another woman just 2 weeks later. I am in pieces. I cant eat I cant sleep I cant even go to work. We had a row and split but I thought we would work things out. But this time ...
A. 30 April 2015: You're telling me that in the three years you've been together, you did not realize, through the arguements, fights, breakups, etc that the relationship is slowing draining? I'm sure you must've sensed him backing away from the relation... (read in full...)
Are my constant thoughts about my BF cheating based on truth or my own fears?
Q. Hello DC. I have a question about trust. My BF and I have been together a couple of years. It is a good relationship and we still have great chemistry. He has cheated in a previous relationship. Not ours. He has always been up front with me...
A. 25 March 2015: Wow! You sure are over thinking things. Every relationship is different and unique. Just because he has cheated in the past does not mean he will cheat in this relationship. Same as just because you have never cheated doesn't mean there is a ... (read in full...)
My partner had an affair. Should I share the details with other husband?
Q. My long term partner (Me: 29F and Him: 32M) had an affair with a recently married woman, lasting about a month that I am aware of. They were family friends, I bartended her brother's wedding, etc. She and I were "friends". Long story short: I had a ...
A. 25 March 2015: I believe you've done your part. Why are you insisting on pursuing it further? Would you like to see their marriage fall apart?
Damage is done. The husband knows. He can choose to do something about it or to do nothing. It appears he chose to forg... (read in full...)
My gf is upset with me for talking to my ex
Q. Me and my exs relationship ended almost 3 years ago and I've been with my now gf for 2 years. My ex gf messaged me on Facebook last Saturday night (we had not spoken for like 8 months prior to this, we don't speak hardly at all to be honest). We ...
A. 25 March 2015: I guess by now you should know that it really ISN'T OK or possible to keep in contact with an ex if your current girlfriend does not approve of it. Rule of thumb regarding exes is to always put your current girlfriend's feelings first.
H... (read in full...)
When you know all this about them, would YOU leave?
Q. Okay so, I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half now. The time has come in which I don't no if I'm happy. The thing is it's easy for people to say well leave. If it was that easy I doubt most marriages would last beyond this time period. ...
A. 21 March 2015: I'm not quite understanding your post here. Yes, I agree that lasting relationships don't come easily.. it takes communication, understanding, sacrifice, compromise, and everything else. However, in your situation, to be arguing so much within the ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend came back but what about this other guy?
Q. Hi, I have been a relationship for almost 2 years now!lately things have been going downhill,we began to argue a lot and started fighting every single day..after one such major fight we stopped talking to each other for 3 weeks during which I got cl...
A. 21 March 2015: You were having issues with your boyfriend.. arguing and feeling unloved. You were craving for some tender loving care. You desperately wanted someone to talk to you, to laugh with you, to show interest in you as a person. You weren't getting any of ... (read in full...)
I think he is keeping secrets about his ex from me!
Q. We have been together 5 years and I know he is in contact with his ex-he says to discuss kids. I know she wants him back. I also know they text and call each other frequently. I also know he deletes his texts from her and most likely, the record of ...
A. 20 March 2015: You've been together for 5 years. FIVE YEARS!! Yet you don't trust him? Why can't you simply ASK him? ASK if he's been keeping in touch with his ex. ASK what they talk/text about (if you really want to know). ASK him to let you know each time the ... (read in full...)
Eight days since the break up. When will I start to feel indifferent?
Q. It's been 8 days since our BU. We were together for almost 5 years and he wasn't good for me. He brought out the absolute worst in me. I don't think he cared about me anymore as he deliberately done things to hurt/piss me off. I broke it off last ...
A. 20 March 2015: So sorry to hear this. I commend you for being wise enough to know it's time to move on and strong enough to do it! Good job!
5 years is a long time. You won't forget so soon or easily. It's going to take some time.. maybe even a couple of year... (read in full...)
My boyfriend read my texts in front of me without my permission. Why did he do this?
Q. I was with my BF of two years the other day and he saw that I received a few texts. The battery died on my phone and as soon as it recharged he saw I had three texts waiting to be read. He seemed very interested in my texts from the moment he sa...
A. 20 March 2015: I don't think it's a matter of him not trusting you. It may be because after being together for two years, he feels you both are close enough that you don't mind.
If this bothers you, why not just tell him? ... (read in full...)
My best friend stopped all contact with me because his girlfriend asked him to?
Q. Hello Everybody! My problem is: I have been friends with a guy for more than 10 years. We attended the same high school, and the same university for BA and also for the MA studies. We never tough about being more than friends, though we kissed...
A. 20 March 2015: This is an unfortunate situation for you. Your best guy friend chose to pursue and focus on his relationship with his current girlfriend over his friendship with you. He must love this girl a lot and want a future with her, to be willing to ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my FWB guy and feel bad about it!
Q. okay dont judge me, but I know this guy who i met through work, we became friends but our friendship went to friends with benefits. we have been like that for about 3 years now. but recently i met this new guy at my new job who i thought was ...
A. 19 March 2015: First and foremost, please excuse me for being out dated. Is there such a thing as cheating on your FWB? My definition of FWB is two people, no feelings, no strings attached, come together for sex and only sex. Hence couldn't you have more than one ... (read in full...)
Are we too young to settle down?
Q. Am I making a mistake by not dating others and exploring my options? I'm twenty and my boyfriend is nineteen and we've been together for almost three years now. We've been through so much together. He helped me overcome my anxiety and depressi...
A. 19 March 2015: I don't believe AGE determines whether you are ready for a committed relationship. I have a few friends who started dating in high school, got married, and had children. They now have a loving family and more in love than ever. As for me, my boyfr... (read in full...)
(Long distance relationship) My girlfriend is being distant towards me. Why?
Q. Hi all, I have been dating my girlfriend and we are having a long distance relationship. We have been dating over a year plus and we've already made plans together, such as me moving over to live with her soon. We used to text and video chat...
A. 19 March 2015: Your relationship might've run it's course and she wants to move on with her life. Couples in a long distance relationship should look forward to talking/seeing each other daily. It appears she wants to do other things than spend time with you.
S... (read in full...)
How can I tell my mother in law that I am not ready to forgive her behaviour?
Q. Hey everyone. Back in December, i wrote on here for advice on dealing with my insensitive, mother in law. Basically, she said some really cruel things to me regarding me infertility struggle. She told me to "hurry the f@*k up to have a baby because ...
A. 18 March 2015: I suggest writing her a letter. Please do not blame her.. simply let her know about the tough patch you went through and how much it had bothered you to think you were infertile. Let her know how much her comments had hurt you. However, end the ... (read in full...)
Love, baby daddy drama, a blossoming friendship! What do I do?
Q. OK so weve started out as friends I'm 23 she's 21. She does have 2 kids and a baby daddy they're kind of falling out lately he's kind of abusive, verbal, physical etc.lately we've been hanging out and she's been hugging me alot. Sitting closer to ...
A. 18 March 2015: Some people think that as long as you feel you're in love with someone, you will be able to accept anything and everything. Sometimes, reality is a little different.
As someone mentioned, right now, you're just a 'house guest'. You're not livi... (read in full...)
Lazy or uninterested?
Q. Are some men just lazy communicators (text, phone) rather than 'not interested'? If so, does this make them emotionally unavailable or just lazy? How does a woman bring this up with a man in the early stages of dating without looking like a clingi...
A. 18 March 2015: My take is, if he keeps replying but in short one word texts, he's lazy. If he doesn't bother to reply or send one minimal reply after you've sent a dozen messages, he's not interested.... (read in full...)
How can we make things fun again?
Q. Hi Everyone, My BF and I have been together for 3 years, and the last year has been an LDR (I live on the West Coast, he lives on the East Coast; this happened for work reasons, but we're both hoping he can move here within the next year). ...
A. 17 March 2015: My boyfriend and I are in a LDR just like your's. I'm on the West Coast and he's on the East Coast. We see each other every 4-6 weeks. I suggest to keep most of the serious talk and planning while you're on the phone or Facetime. Try not to get too ... (read in full...)
Broke up recently. Have I lost the love of my life? How do I get over this?
Q. I broke up with my ex a month or two ago and recently I've been feeling very sad and melancholy. She was only girlfriend I ever had who I could see myself seriously marrying. We would look at houses and discuss what our kids would look like. She's ...
A. 17 March 2015: You need to realize this relationship is OVER! She is not doing anything to try to hurt you or get your attention. She is moving on with her life. So should you! Nothing you say is going to change her mind because she has decided to move on! You ju... (read in full...)
I asked him if he'd like to have a drink sometime. His answer has me wondering what to do next!
Q. Hi I am in need of some advice. There is a guy on my sports team who when we first met I kept catching him glancing over to me and when our eyes met we would smile and look away shyly. This happened over several months. We started talking more and ...
A. 17 March 2015: Whether happy or not, his main point is to let you know he's in a relationship. He will not go out to have drinks with you or anywhere alone with you. I find it to be a very respectful answer.
He tried to carry on a normal conversation with you beca... (read in full...)
Is it wise to date this guy whose ex is lurking in the background?
Q. Dear Cupid friends, Your advice has always been invaluable to me. A guy that I used to bump into after work ( we used to say hello) found me on facebook and then asked me to go out. I went out with him after work on Tuesday and I really liked h...
A. 16 March 2015: I would tell him that you want to remain friends until he sorts things out with his ex. I will NOT continue dating this guy while he is still sorting things out. Once he decides he wants to pursue a relationship with you, he MUST let his ex know ... (read in full...)
Broke up recently. Have I lost the love of my life? How do I get over this?
Q. I broke up with my ex a month or two ago and recently I've been feeling very sad and melancholy. She was only girlfriend I ever had who I could see myself seriously marrying. We would look at houses and discuss what our kids would look like. She's ...
A. 16 March 2015: Regardless of HOW or WHY you two broke up, you're broken up! STOP checking her intagram, facebook, or any other social media. Stop asking about her and if someone tells you about her, stop them and tell them you don't need to know. If yoj truly wa... (read in full...)
I think we are broken up but I'm not sure, and I need help in getting some of my things back. Help?
Q. Hi, I have been dating my boyfriend for the past 2 years now.. we have been fighting a lot,arguing so much that I can't remember of a single restaurant or a place we went where we haven't fought (not public fighting but just no talking to each oth...
A. 11 March 2015: Your situation sounds like that of my boyfriend and his ex from RI. They argued every day about the silliest things. One minute they can be doing fine and happy and the next minute they'd be arguing. This lasted a bit over 2 years for them.
E... (read in full...)
He's bad for me but I have a hard time letting him go
Q. Recently I met this guy who I thought was the greatest thing that happened to me. He always knows the right words to say and I fell for him. Now im realizing how crappy he has been treating me. He calls me every night but always hangs up on me wh...
A. 11 March 2015: I agree with Xearo.. it's a BAD ADDICTION.
I guess it's all a part of life. We reason with ourselves and why and how this is bad for us, and how we should just walk away, yet we can't. Nothing is holding us back but we just can't walk away.
Unfor... (read in full...)
Should I confront him or should I wait 2 more weeks?
Q. I met this guy abt 2 years ago, and we hung out a few times but unfortunately I wasnt ready for relationship so I let him go. Now recently we have talked again, and he told me he still liked me and that he would love to be my bf and he e...
A. 11 March 2015: I believe talk is cheap. A man will SHOW you how interested he is in you. You will be able to tell from his actions (i.e how often he calls, visits, little things he does for you) how serious he is about you and being with you.
I would hold off on m... (read in full...)
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