I don't know how to tell him I'm scared about getting pregnant, what should I do?
Q. i'm 15yrs old and my boyfriend is 23 he's already got a daughter, and i've been pregnant before but miscarried. when we have sex he doesn't use condoms and i don't want to get pregnant again, he says he wants me to have his kids but only when i'm ...
A. 5 June 2006: Whatever my personal thoughts on a young girl getting involved with someone who is so obviously totally irresponcible, you main priority here is to get yoursef to a family planning clinic or your doctor and get some form of reliable contraception ... (read in full...)
What shall I do about my relationship? (long post)
Q. Hello! I have been lurking around reading questions and answers for some time now, looking for an answer to my problem. I do realize, however, that every situation is different and should be treated as such. Having said that, I have a question,...
A. 2 June 2006: You know the saying curiosity killed the cat? Obviously reading her mail has made you feel very unsure of her true feelings towards you, it's a vicious circle you have entered, you will never be satisfied even if you read what you are hoping to, you ... (read in full...)
Mixed race relationships.... What do you think???
Q. Hi, what does everybody think of mixed relationships, i.e mixed race relationships? Do you think that even in today's society, it is ok for lets say an Asian woman to date a white man, or a black girl to date an Italian etc etc. I ask because I find ...
A. 29 May 2006: In my opinion love does not discriminate between race, creed or culture. If you love someone, respect them, their beliefs and their culture and are prepared for some compromise in the relationship, there's nothing wrong with mixed race ... (read in full...)
Possesive boyfriend is making my life hell.. Please help??
Q. i cant make my mind up to be with a guy.. its really stressin me out and making sick - how do i make the right choice? This guy is very jealous and possesvie and smashes my things - he has had girlfriends but always came back to my house and we h...
A. 29 May 2006: It sounds as if this guy has become a habit for you, he's not what you really want, you can see his faults but you can't seem to live your life without him in it. He on the other hand doesn't really want you either,he just doesn't want anyone else ... (read in full...)
I am not physically attracted to me but shes wonderful!!!
Q. Hello. I feel sad just typing this in. My problem is that I have been dating a brilliant girl for a year now. I am in my 30's and she is a couple of years younger. I have never been treated this special by anyone before. Back to the problem: I a...
A. 26 May 2006: I agree with everyone else here, you need to be honest with her and tell her it's not working for you. Of course she'll be hurt, and she'll want to know why you suddenly feel this way, but I see no point staying in a relationship where you feel no ... (read in full...)
How can i keep my affair a secret from my sister and my boyfriend?
Q. hi i am 21 and livin with my sister whos married in london.i ve been having a secret sexual realationship with my sisters husband and he tells me that he likes me just for sex and i too like him to have sex with me only.i have a boyfriend also and ...
A. 26 May 2006: Are you for real?
I can't believe that you are asking us how to keep the fact you are shagging your sister's husband a secret!
I hope she finds out, kicks your backside and dumps her no good cheating husband, she's better off without the pair of ... (read in full...)
I can't control this feeling that I have, any advice will be much appreciated!
Q. ive been with my boyfriend for six months now and overall it has been going great, of course we have our ups and downs but the relationship is very good, i love him deeply and he loves me too. the problem is, is that ive never been ina proper ...
A. 25 May 2006: You admit to having been hurt before and it seems that your fear of the future is a direct consequence of this. You are mentally preparing for the worst to happen so if it does you think by being prepared you won't be so hurt if things go wrong with ... (read in full...)
Sex isn't painful anymore... it just feels numb. Is that all there is?
Q. I have a problem with my relationship. I'm 22 years old. I have been with my boyfriend for 6 years. We broke up last year because I found out my boyfriend had someone else. He said it wasnt important to him, he just enjoyed the attention he got f...
A. 25 May 2006: From what you say I gather sex is no longer painful, in fact you say you have no feeling when having penetrative sex, that it feels numb.
I maybe wrong, but I feel the problem here is that you are one of the many women who find penetrative sex less... (read in full...)
I hate leading this double-life but really dont know what to do!!!
Q. I'm in a relationship with my girlfriend of 5years and have a beautiful daughter aged 3. I'm 22 she is 22. The problem is that our relationship is gone stale.i find it hard to be affectionate to her eg.kissing cuddling up playing with her hair ect...
A. 24 May 2006: If you feel the relationship you have with the mother of your daughter is over and that you're only in it for the child's sake then you should really be asking yourself what effect the arguing and bad feeling between you and your partner will have ... (read in full...)
Getting out of a bad marriage and having an affair with married man
Q. I have just come through a dreadful breakdown in my marriage, he has left and I am battling with divorce. The thing is, I have met someone who has given me a shoulder and we have begun an affair. I know it won't help in the long run but for now he h...
A. 19 May 2006: Although I'm sorry to hear about the breakdown of your marriage, it's never easy, I can't say I have any sympathy for you in regard to not having enough time with your married lover!
You are involved with someone who is committed to someone else... (read in full...)
How to go pubilic about my new relationship after the break up of my marriage.
Q. Hi, First i must say that i have always found your column very helpful and i can relate to some of the advice given. Well here is my problem, six months ago i came out of a marriage that i was more a convenience than a wife, i had looked up to m...
A. 19 May 2006: It sounds as if you have come out the otherside of what sounds like a very traumatic time, when your marriage ended you lost a very important part of your life, but it sounds like you have done your grieving for the relationship and now feel it ... (read in full...)
Want to marry, want to attend therapy but want to see other girls
Q. Hi there, Thanks everyone for your advice on my last question... A rollercoaster ride.. Well, we had our first therapy session today. It went OK, but the focus was more based around what we are to do about going overseas rather than the matters...
A. 18 May 2006: The problem you have here is that you are recieving completly mixed signals.....Does your b/f seriously know what he wants or how his behaviour is affecting you, sorry but he is being completly selfish!
You cannot tell someone that loves you that... (read in full...)
My gay ex never turned up for a meeting and now ignores me
Q. Can someone help me work out my gay ex. He left me for another lad who is 33 and has just come out of a divorce and has two kids. I recently met my ex and he said things were not working out, saying he was being made to feel second best. Anyway, a...
A. 18 May 2006: I remember your previous posts on this, and it seems you are still hoping for a reconciliation.....
This guy plays you for a fool, he says jump, you say how high! It's time for you to move on, stop living with false hope, as much as I hate to say ... (read in full...)
Is saying "I love you" really that important?
Q. im a guy whos with my girlfriend over 6 mts. do i need to tell her i love her as i feel i show it enough. i dont usually talk that soppy. chances are she knows i love her by my actions?...
A. 18 May 2006: Do you love her?
Has she told you that she loves you? If she has and you are in love with her tell her and make her day, woman like to know they are loved.
If she hasn't said she loves you maybe she's waiting for you to say it first...... (read in full...)
My husband has been seeing escorts....is it my fault?
Q. I have just found out my husband has been visiting escort agency girls - dominatrix in particular. How should I handle this? Is it my fault as I haven't been too interested in sex for about 6 months. thanks...
A. 18 May 2006: You should not blame yourself for the fact your husband pays for sex, and if he's into Dominatrix I should imagine he has some sort of fetish.
I agree with DrPsych here, you need to have a frank and honest talk to your husband and work through this... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has had 6 lovers and I am a virgin
Q. I've been seeing my 22 year old boyfriend for almost 3 months, and last night I learned that he has slept with 6 girls in his past. I'm a 21 year old virgin, and knew that he had had sex before, but I feel so differently now that I know his ...
A. 18 May 2006: If you are worried about being just another notch on your boyfrind's bedpost, and feel reluctant to give up your virginity to him, then my advice would be not to sleep with him until you feel more secure in the relationship.
If his past is haun... (read in full...)
I just need to get away and my bf doesn't support that...
Q. Im 20 and My partner and i have been together for about 2 years and everything has been great, Although i have been through alot with him he was there for me hen my friend passed away and recently when my friend was murdered. Suddenly i feel lik...
A. 18 May 2006: If you are planning on going away with the possibility of "hooking up" with someone else whilst you are away, then do the decent thing and finish with your boyfriend before you go. If you were to meet someone else while away and ended up sleeping ... (read in full...)
I don't trust my cheating boyfriend. Time to move on?
Q. ive been in a relationship for 8yrs, ofcourse there were breakups to makeups, mainly because he was cheating. he impregnated another woman behind my back and we are still in a relationship. i dont know whether to trust him or not, because he says he ...
A. 18 May 2006: Only time will tell if your partner is still a cheat or not, it's whether you want to stay with him long enough to find out.
If you feel you are wasting your time in the relationship, maybe it's time to let go.
Have you told your partner how he m... (read in full...)
My sister's boyfriend as taken over her life!
Q. Possessive or Insecure?? Dear Cupid, My sister has been currently dating a Libian young guy for around four months now. She use to have such a gorgeous look to her when she first started dating him but now she wears no make up and baggy shirts...
A. 17 May 2006: This sounds like a clash of culture here. Your sister's boyfriend obviously wants her to dress and behave in a way that he has been brought up to believe is right, how women should dress, no make up, clothes that cover the body and an appearance ... (read in full...)
Torn between two men!
Q. 10 wks ago during a drunken arguement i told my fella to go and he did, he wouldn,t answer my phone calls or reply to my texts for weeks it broke my heart. 3 wks later we began to talk as we had a holiday booked for a wk after. I secretly hoped we ...
A. 16 May 2006: You'd broken up with your boyfriend, been through the part where you hoped things would turn around and you'd get back together, probably cried buckets for him when you realised you wouldn't, and basically went through the process of healing a ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is bisexual and cheated on me
Q. Should i continue my relationship with my boyfriend of seven years coz he recently admitted he was bisexual and had a same sex partner during some time in our relationship? Thank you very much - Distraught soul...
A. 15 May 2006: Whether your boyfriend is bi-sexual or not is no excuse for him to cheat on you, does it matter that he had sex with another man and not a woman, he was still unfaithfull to you!
Only you can answer the question as to whether you should stay with... (read in full...)
Do I play hard to get or tell him I want him back? Which is best?
Q. Should I play it like I'm strong or show him I love him and want him back? My boyfriend of 7 years finished with me a month ago. We were planning to get married in a couple of years, but do the whole travelling round the world thing for a year fir...
A. 15 May 2006: You may not want to hear this, but I think the guy is done with you, for now at least!
Time for you to consider moving on with your life, as hard as it is, it sounds as if your ex has made up his mind where you are concerned. I wouldn't play mind... (read in full...)
I'm in a 10 month relationship, which is tearing me apart and breaking every bit of my confidence...
Q. I'm in a 10 month relationship, which is tearing me apart and breaking every bit of my confidence. My bf's dominating. He wants to have the power over me, from changing my sense of dressing, not mixing around with anyone, prioritizing only him, ...
A. 15 May 2006: Walk away now while you are only ten months into this relationship instead of ten years! Stay with this man and you will end up having no self confidence and no self esteem, and a belly full of hatred for this man.
You know the way you are bein... (read in full...)
How do I get out of this relationship??
Q. hello all, You will be sick of me by now. Is it too much to want to be a strong independent woman? Why cant i get out of this relationship? My boyfriend is mentally and sexually abusing me and instead of getting rid of him and being truly happ...
A. 12 May 2006: What is it that keeps you in the relationship when you openly admit to being abused? Are you hoping by some miracle you will wake up one day to find he's changed? Is it the fear that if you leave he will never leave you in peace because of the child ... (read in full...)
Tell me... Am I too young to be a mum?
Q. Hi. I need some advise. I am 22 years old, 23 this year and have been with my for a long time. I have always wanted to be a mother, but always wanted it to be later on ie 28years old ish! Recently I have beenthinking of nothing else, I want to ...
A. 12 May 2006: I don't think you're too young, but you and your partner are the ones who have to decide if you are both ready for the commitment and life changes that having a child entails. Have you and your partner done everything you wanted to do before having ... (read in full...)
Should I ask if he wants to see me again?
Q. ive been talking to this soldier while he was in iraq and since hes been back ive have seen him twice and slept the night with him.People tell me not to text him and let him come to me but i find it so hard and wish to and twice he has made the ...
A. 10 May 2006: Why not? If you like him and enjoy his company there's nothing wrong in giving him a call to see if you can meet up.
If you never contact him he may start to get the impression that your not that interested. Keep in contact, but keep it reso... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair??
Q. I met a man at work when he came from an agency to cover shifts, we went for a drink after work and had a kiss in his car the only thing is he's married and wants us to have an affair. Should i because i don't want anyone full time and it would su...
A. 10 May 2006: Hey everyone wasting their time answering this post, you can lead a horse to water, but you can't make it drink!
Cazzy, you have obviously made your choice, no advice given to you will change that, and no excuses made for your man will excuse chea... (read in full...)
A mutual friend keeps calling round to discuss her sexual problems with my HUSBAND!
Q. Sorry but i don`t know what to do. A mutusal girlfriend is forever calli ng round to discuss her sexual problems withj my husband. The sexual tension is palpable and despite telli ng him i feel threatened he calls me paranoid. To get the agony over ...
A. 8 May 2006: A FRIEND??
You are being manipulated and your husband is behaving in a way that is disrespectful and completly wrong.
No doubt you let them kiss to test your husband, and now it has done more harm than good where your relationship is concerne... (read in full...)
I love my husband of 11 years but I'm in love with my lover of 7 years.
Q. My problem is deep. I love my husband of fifteen years, who, unfortunately I have outgrown because he lacks vision, ambition and the ability to plan for our future, which includes our eleven year old daughter. I'm in love with my lover of seven ...
A. 8 May 2006: You have to learn to live alone without the security of marriage. Your marriage obviously means very little to you for you to have been cheating on your husband for so long.
There is only one way to find out whether your b/f is sincere when he says... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair??
Q. I met a man at work when he came from an agency to cover shifts, we went for a drink after work and had a kiss in his car the only thing is he's married and wants us to have an affair. Should i because i don't want anyone full time and it would su...
A. 8 May 2006: Whatever!!!!... (read in full...)
My crush asked me to do a threesome.. What will I do??
Q. Something weird has happened: I have had a huge crush on an incredibly good friend of mine for three years, we've kissed eachother so many times randomly out of passion, and have come close to doing stuff a few times but I'm shy so I always back ...
A. 8 May 2006: As a rule of thumb my moto is is "if in doubt say no"! You can't be that shy to even consider it!
Don't do anything you may live to regret. If your looking to have a relationship with this man, I don't think a threesomes a great way to start it, ... (read in full...)
Who is to blame in this relationship? Me or him??
Q. Hello, here's the problem. I work in an environment where I run into a lot of people who are victims of domestic violence. Furthermore, I met a woman in my college class who was in a violent marriage before and she said, if you're ever going to...
A. 8 May 2006: Dr Pete is right here, you need to take a good look at your behaviour, you're pushing this guy in one direction, right out the door, and your life!
Would you find this behaviour acceptable if he treated you this way?
Sorry but I think you are acti... (read in full...)
Feel as if new guy is out of my league, What can I do??
Q. About six months ago my ex-boyfriend of 4 years broke up with me - it was a messy and drawn out breakup, with him not being able to decide whether he wanted to settle down with me or live the single life for a bit. There was no closure on this ...
A. 8 May 2006: Why do you think this guy is out of your league? He obviously finds you attractive and enjoys your company to have taken you out more than once.
All relationships can potentially break your heart, no one knows for sure when a relationship star... (read in full...)
Her ex, who was supposed to have commited suicide, has been in prison and gotten back in touch!
Q. I have a net girlfriend (we havent met yet) who i've been with for 13 months. Today is her birthday and she recieved flowers from an ex. The only problem is is that this guy is supposed to have committed suicide 3 years ago and instead has been in ...
A. 5 May 2006: Why do you want her to contact her ex? It has to be her decision, maybe she doesn't want to ruin your relationship, or maybe she doesn't want the guy back in her life.
Leave her to make her own mind up.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
I'm in a sexual relationship with my older stepsister, afraid of what our parents would think.
Q. Iam a 17 year old male from England and for the past 4 years I have been having a regular sexual relationship with my stepsister who is 4 years older than me. It all started while our parents were on their honeymoon and she was left to look after me...
A. 4 May 2006: The only way to find out if your parents will approve is if you sit them down and tell them what's been going on between you and your step-sister.
Your parent may feel you are a bit young to settle down, and be a little uncomfortable about you havi... (read in full...)
He says it is like he asked God for the perfect woman, and I was delivered to him... But he broke up with me.
Q. I am suffering hard core from a break up. I got some closure from my boyfriend (now ex) last night. He says the past two weeks have been hell for him too, as we broke up two weeks ago. He says it is like he asked God for the perfect woman, and I ...
A. 3 May 2006: You are understandably confused right now, and the problem is your ex-boyfriend is giving you very mixed signals, (saying you are the most beautiful, amazing person, but he cannot be with you as he's not in love with you.) It's a bit like the guys ... (read in full...)
He's getting texts at weird times and I think he's lying to me. Am I right?
Q. i really need some unbiased advice. im 29, married (hubby 50). the thing is, hubby does occasions mechanical work on vehicles, purely an occasional sideline., there is a woman, around my age, that became a customer last year, but over the past month ...
A. 3 May 2006: Your gut instinct maybe right here, it does all sound very suspicious, but proof's what you need.
You have choices here, you can sit back and see what happens, you can confront him, or you can find her number and confront her if you think she's more... (read in full...)
My wife has developed gay tendencies... How can we deal with this?
Q. I'm in a right pickle. I've been married for four years and over the past several months it's become clear, in discussion with my wife, that she is uncovering the details of her orientation - personally supressed due to childhood environment - and ...
A. 3 May 2006: I think you need to sit down with your wife and have a very honest and frank discussion about how her gay tendencies are likely to affect your relationship, and the lives of any children you may have.(you don't say if you have or not)
Does she feel... (read in full...)
My ex kissed me and I know hes the one for me!
Q. Hi. Just need a little advice. I split up with my gay boyfriend (21) a few months back after he left me as he said he was having feelings for his friend who is 33 and has just had a marriage break-up and he has two kids. Anyway, contact between ...
A. 2 May 2006: Hmm.... seem to remember this post originally and remember the history here. It seems your still hooked on this guy, and it looks as if things didn't work out with the guy he left you for.
I would say, just be careful you don't get hurt again, I kn... (read in full...)
Where can my bf get help for his anger problems??
Q. Hi, My boyfriend has got anger problems, hes fine until we have an argument and then he starts to push me and he has grabbed me by the throat before. I would like to help him... but where can he go??I have sent him to his local docter and that was...
A. 30 April 2006: It sounds as if your boyfriend could do with an anger management course. If you get him to go and see his GP again, he should be able to point him in the right direction. If he had no joy with the last GP he saw, he might want to see another one who ... (read in full...)
My friend asks guys out I want for herself!!
Q. How can i get boyfriend if my friend whenever i tell her who i like goes and asks him out for herself?...
A. 30 April 2006: Best solution to this is DON'T tell your mate who you fancy, keep it to yourself and ask the guy out before your so called friend knows you like him.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair??
Q. I met a man at work when he came from an agency to cover shifts, we went for a drink after work and had a kiss in his car the only thing is he's married and wants us to have an affair. Should i because i don't want anyone full time and it would su...
A. 25 April 2006: Hmm..... your right here Martini, it's not advice Cazzy was looking for, but approval, not sure she'll get that!
Get the feeling that you will go for it anyway Cazzy, you're not interested in how this could effect others, you like him and you want... (read in full...)
Should I have an affair??
Q. I met a man at work when he came from an agency to cover shifts, we went for a drink after work and had a kiss in his car the only thing is he's married and wants us to have an affair. Should i because i don't want anyone full time and it would su...
A. 24 April 2006: Sure it would suit you, no strings and no commitment, same for him, but what about his WIFE!!!!
Find a single guy who's happy with a casual relationship, believe me there's plenty out there!
Tell this man to do his wife a favour, get a divorce ... (read in full...)
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