What is going on with my boyfriend? He is confusing me so much
Q. He hasn't called me in 48 hours almost and I don't know what is going on. Last time I actually spoke with him, he got off the phone after 10 minutes saying his mom wanted to speak to him, and he hasn't called back since even though he said he would. ...
A. 30 May 2011: Two days isn't so long, actually. I say give him some space and do not text him today. You can't force him to open up to you, and if he cares about you, he'll let you in in his time.
Getting someone to open up is like a flower opening up. You... (read in full...)
Ex has just broken up with his girlfriend. How can I get him back without being pushy?
Q. I need some help on how to get my ex boyfriend back. Him and his girlfriend just broke up and he's heartbroken. I'm trying to give him some space but I still wanna be there for him and spend time with him. How can I do this without being pushy? I ...
A. 30 May 2011: Be his friend, and be a really good listener. Don't assert your romantic feelings until his grieving period for his girlfriend is over, or it could get messy and ultimately weaken his relationship with you due to unresolved feelings for this ... (read in full...)
Girl I am seeing is very moody and never makes an attempt to control her moods!
Q. The girl I am seeing and I got into big fight the other day. She is very moody and when she is in a bad mood she makes no attempt to cover it up. So if she is sad or excited or angry or impatient...she lets it all out! Needless to say it makes ...
A. 30 May 2011: It's not clear by your post how she reacts to her moods. If she's taking them out on you and being mean and thoughtless to you when she's feeling these moods, of course that's a no no. Being moody gives no one the right to attack or verbally abuse ... (read in full...)
The guy I dated briefly said that I scared him with my questions!!
Q. I dated this great guy for a month. He said on the third date that he like me very much, we also had such a great time togheter, lots of laugh,and a great chemistry. We were also very attracted to eachoter, even though we didnt have sex (he said it ...
A. 30 May 2011: It sounds like you came across as too emotionally needy when you talked to him too early of feelings and insecurity. Emotionally needy also gives a message of clinginess that unfortunately does scare guys off.
This doesn't mean that they were onl... (read in full...)
I tortured him because he loved me. I'm a idiot.
Q. There was this guy that love me so much that it made me kinda hate him so used to do a lot of hateful things to him so he would suffer because I knew he would keep coming back for more no matter what. He finally left me and I can't forgive myself ...
A. 29 May 2011: You tortured him because he loved you??? If you didn't love him back at first, why didn't you just let him down easily? Why did you have to do hateful things to him? AngelD made a good point. I don't think you had a change of heart. I th... (read in full...)
Girlfriend punched me in testicles, so I punched her in the hip. Now for some reason, she won't talk to me. What do I do?
Q. I need your help. I'm 15 and my girlfriend's 14. We're in the same year and basically the other day we were in my house after school just chilling, we were having one of our fun little arguments but then we started toy fighting and I floored her and ...
A. 29 May 2011: I'm going to talk to you straight, only because at the age of 15, you may yet be malleable enough to let what we're saying to you change you into something better, so listen good:
Never ever forget that you just seriously hurt this girl out of a... (read in full...)
Girlfriend punched me in testicles, so I punched her in the hip. Now for some reason, she won't talk to me. What do I do?
Q. I need your help. I'm 15 and my girlfriend's 14. We're in the same year and basically the other day we were in my house after school just chilling, we were having one of our fun little arguments but then we started toy fighting and I floored her and ...
A. 28 May 2011: Okay, I disagree that it was nobody's fault here. You two were play fighting. You agree that it was an accident that she punched you in the testicles. You had "floored" her previously, right?
Here's the problem. When you hauled off and punc... (read in full...)
I made a big mistake while drunk. How do I move on?
Q. About 4 year ago, I went to a bar. I was 21 at the time, and pretty inexperienced when it came to any sort of physical interaction. I felt as though I needed to get out and see what I was 'missing'. I was sitting outside of a local bar on a patio,...
A. 25 May 2011: Relax. You didn't cause any harm to her. Let it go. You were drunk and in a bar. She let you know she didn't like it, and that's the end of it. Chances are, she's forgotten all about it. Forgive yourself, learn from it, and make your next ... (read in full...)
Is this insecure man testing me?
Q. Would an insecure man who constantly tests you go as far to tell you he is engaged and going to get married just to see your reaction? And would he then have a problem if you just replied and said she is a lucky girl and i hope it all works out for ...
A. 25 May 2011: If he's saying that to you as a test and it's not true, then he is a game player. Respond like CG and SVC advise, and then leave him alone. Even if he says "I'm not really engaged", leave him alone.
If you don't leave him alone and you get ... (read in full...)
After years of a sexless marriage my eye is beginning to wander
Q. OK, here's my situation. I have a good marriage of 12 years and a nine year old son. In the last 9 years my wife has not made love to me except for two times, even though every other part of the marriage works. Even after surviving SERIOUS cancer ...
A. 25 May 2011: Good lord. This other woman is not good news, and I'm glad you're seeing that even now. She finds your attention really intoxicating, and she wants to keep you at the height of interest without going over the line and threatening her marriage. ... (read in full...)
Why can't he commit to just me?
Q. I am 18 years of age, and for three years I have been inlove with one particular male. We have been close from the day we have met. And I have always stood by him and been loyal. Although the relationship has been on and off for the past three years ...
A. 25 May 2011: I second that. CaringGuy is 1000% right, especially with his last paragraph regarding waking up before you become invisible to other better guys.... (read in full...)
I'm having an affair. Not sure I want to. How do I get my will power back?
Q. Two weeks ago, my neighbour kissed me. We have been texting and meeting up secretly. I feel horrible...my conscience is killing me....yet I feel completely helpless. How do I get my will power back? I know this isn't good for anyone... and no...
A. 24 May 2011: There is only two ways out of this for you.
One is aided by his leaving. You must cut it off. Go cold turkey. You are addicted to him like a heroin addict is addicted to the drugs.
The second way has a much better chance of success, but ... (read in full...)
After years of a sexless marriage my eye is beginning to wander
Q. OK, here's my situation. I have a good marriage of 12 years and a nine year old son. In the last 9 years my wife has not made love to me except for two times, even though every other part of the marriage works. Even after surviving SERIOUS cancer ...
A. 24 May 2011: Okay, first, you are in a vulnerable position in your life. A marriage needs sexual and emotional intimacy to stay vital and vibrant. The only time I can see any stopping of sex being acceptible in a marriage is if one or both members become sick ... (read in full...)
I want to be friends with my guy friends like we were before they got girlfriends!
Q. This situation is really upsetting to me. I'm a woman who has always gravitated to male friends. Having friends that I can share things and confide in is really important to me, and I need to have friends, but I feel that guys understand me and I ...
A. 23 May 2011: The only answer that I can come up with is...that's the way it is. Very close friendships between straight guys and straight girls often lead to being more than that. Friendships exist between guys and girls even after relationships, but there are ... (read in full...)
How do I make my husband see what his lying does to me?
Q. How do you get your husband to understand the amount of pain his constant lying and flirting can do to a marriage?...
A. 18 May 2011: Without knowing the details, I'd say that's pretty easy.
You tell him in great detail what his behavior is doing to you, and that you will no longer put up with it.
Then you put teeth to your ultimatum. If he doesn't stop, you leave him.... (read in full...)
He wont introduce me to his family, am I getting upset over nothing?
Q. My boyfriend wont introduce me to his family. I asked him at the weekend why, but he didnt give me an answer. He just said I dont muscle into peoples business so I dont expect people to do the same with me. We have being together for 6 month no...
A. 16 May 2011: Actually, I am going to agree with you on this one. I would feel like something's off if my boyfriend of six months is using that reason as an excuse not to introduce his family to you.
If the answer were "My family is still a bit upset over my ... (read in full...)
Hygenic to go back and forth between 2 places?
Q. I have a fantasy about having half anal sex and half vginal sex as in in and out of one for a bit then in the next hole, but is that hygienic!?...
A. 15 May 2011: NOOO! Don't do that!
You wouldn't want a new fantasy called "major vaginal infection accompanied by unbearable pain" because the bacteria in fecal matter got inside your sensitive vagina. The complications from that are really nasty.
... (read in full...)
Is he trying to get revenge after I had sex with someone else? Or does he just not care about me?
Q. I've had a relationship with a guy for about a year and a half now, we have never actually called each other " boyfriend, girlfriend" but when him and I are on good terms, he doesn't mess with other girls and I don't mess with other guys. We have ...
A. 10 May 2011: Good grief. You go out for a year and a half, but you don't make it "official". Trust me, sleeping with another guy did nothing to help that out.
You might say to yourself, "well, since he didn't make it official, it's not cheating". The trut... (read in full...)
My husband was cheating on me with prostitutes!
Q. My husband cheated on me with prostitutes, I had just gave birth to my first child. I had no clue he was sleeping around, I found this out about a year ago. We are still together but it's not the same, everytime I see him I think of how he hurt me. ...
A. 10 May 2011: Oh gross! I'd feel sick to my stomach too!
You've been with him for a year since this all came out? How has he been since you found out? Has he been faithful, open, honest, and actively trying to rebuild your trust and is a good dad, or is he... (read in full...)
Should I have an abortion? I don't know who the father is!
Q. Should I go through with an abortion? My partner and I have been together for a year and recently have been arguing none stop about our financial situation, it resulted in me having a one night stand and I have just found out that I am pregnant. I ...
A. 10 May 2011: An abortion is your decision and yours alone. However, even if you abort, it may get rid of the effects of your cheating, but it won't get rid of the thing that made you cheat in the first place.
This is not how you solve fights. This is not h... (read in full...)
He doesn't want to appear "pussy whipped" to his online friends and makes comments at my expense!
Q. This is a bit of a weird question. I want to know if I am being insecure of if something is amiss with this issue. My boyfriend plays games a lot as a way to escape. He has a close circle of online friends whom he speaks to a lot as he plays wi...
A. 9 May 2011: I read through your question twice, and I think there are two points here I'd like to touch on.
1. I absolutely agree with you on the idea of his putting you down to look good to his gamer friends. That is disrespectful, hurtful, and he shoul... (read in full...)
What are the signs a guy ISN'T looking just to toot it and boot it?
Q. So firstly, thanks in advance for trying to help! How do you know if a guy genuinely cares about you, or if he's just acting all sweet and innocent to get what he wants out of you? There's this guy whose known for being a flirt-- not exactly ...
A. 9 May 2011: Typically, guys who want just sex with a girl tend not to be too patient. It's possible that he might have feelings for you. However, there are two things you wrote on here that made me take notice: 1. "whenever we get into a fight and start ... (read in full...)
My husband left our son and I for my friend! How do I cope?
Q. I can't cope. I can't stop crying day and night, I try to keep myself busy but as soon as I am not busy I just feel this pain more and more, its unbearable. I am trying to cope, trying to move on but I just can't and I hate myself for feeling like ...
A. 9 May 2011: You did not deserve this. No one deserves to be betrayed like this. You are in the storm right now, so you see no end in sight. You're feeling shattered, rejected, horrible pain for your son and you, and that is normal and natural. Added ... (read in full...)
How can I fake being a virgin?
Q. hi there, my name is nancy and i was wondering if anyone has any ideas on how i can fake being a virgin. because i'm gettin married soon and it's a crime in my culture to have sex before marrige....
A. 8 May 2011: I know that it's not as easy as it sounds, but why not marry into a different culture? I know it has to do with reputation within one's own family, but why not marry a guy who has no such demand (i.e. a woman who must be a virgin).
Nancy... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants another chance! Do I give it to her?
Q. hi people. my girlfriend went with a guy alone, without telling me n later she lied. this guy studied with her in her classes, n he is an intelligent guy with good sense of humor. he liked my girlfriend n proposed her too. he asked my girlfri...
A. 8 May 2011: You broke into the guy's cellphone??
You make me nervous. You argued with your girlfriend the whole time, and used to fight with her, and then broke up with her after she was alone with another guy (which I agree - she shouldn't have done tha... (read in full...)
Broke off my engagement and fell for my lesbian friend. Now what?
Q. My life has been confusing these past few months... I guess I will start with some background history. I am a 20 year old female that just ended a 4.5 year engagement with the man I thought I wanted to marry...( I still love him.. idk if it is that ...
A. 8 May 2011: First, do not do "no strings attached" sex! Why on earth would you do that?? If she's nervous you'll leave for another man, you'd reinforce that fear with having quick and casual sex with her in the first place. No, tell her that you really like ... (read in full...)
Why am I so upset by this guy?
Q. A guy I used to be sort of "friends with benefits" with, and who I still like a lot, wants to sleep with me even though he now has a girlfriend. He's been with her for nearly 2 years but he's been coming on to me for about a year and a half. We he ...
A. 6 May 2011: I agree with angel except that I don't think you should ignore the guy. You've tried to ignore him on a number of occasions and he keeps trying.
You should give him a dose of reality, as in "Maybe we were FWB at one time, but I don't sleep wi... (read in full...)
Fiance won't get rid of pictures of his ex!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a half, he recently proposed and I said yes. Only problem is he won't get rid of pictures of him and his ex girlfriend. They had many issues, he said they would break up and get back together, ...
A. 4 May 2011: I think it depends on where they are, but I pretty much agree with the rest in saying no, he shouldn't have to automatically throw them away to prove his love unless... 1. The pictures are nudes. That's just gross and creepy to keep an ex's nud... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's addicted to porn! How can I help him?
Q. my boyfriend of 3 years is addicted to porn, and he has asked me to help him quit. how can i help him? are there any hotlines i can have him call, or a meeting he can attend? i told him if there is a class and he doesnt want to attend it alone i ...
A. 1 May 2011: That's really great that you want to help him. My hats off to your boyfriend for recognizing and wanting to be free from an addiction.
You never mentioned anything about the living arrangements you have (living together or separated), but if h... (read in full...)
It's our first meeting, should we have sex?
Q. i met this guy online about two weeks ago. we are planing to meet in june. we have had phonesex twice. he is 30 and im 20. i know if we do meet we will have sex. and i want to. i just dont want him to think that i am a slut. what would you think if ...
A. 1 May 2011: Honestly? I think you should put off the meeting. Two weeks is a really short time on the internet. A week on the internet is like a day in real life. Would you have sex with a guy you met in person after two days?
You hardly know him, and... (read in full...)
He cheated with a coworker, how can I trust him around her every day?
Q. So, I am in a relationship of over 7 years with 2 kids, and we went through this situation when he cheated with this girl from his job. i don't know how far it went with her honestly, other than a make out session at work. now i moved on from this ...
A. 1 May 2011: The simple answer is that you can't trust him, and you shouldn't trust him. He cheated and shattered your trust. You didn't have to forgive him, but you did. However, forgiveness doesn't equal a restoration in the trust that was lost. That takes ... (read in full...)
How do I trust him when he's posting these things on Facebook?
Q. I don't know what to do!I just found out that My boyfriend talks flirtatious to other women on Facebook! One if his comments on his wall says "anyone want to talk dirty" wtf? Then he goes and says that they couldn't handle him and these girls are ...
A. 1 May 2011: There are two things going on here that I can see.
First, his writing flirtatious things to people on Facebook is inappropriate and disrespectful to you. Are you listed as his wife on there? If so, that's just not cool. If not, why doesn't ... (read in full...)
He's ONLY hit me twice recently. But should I end this relationship?
Q. My partner used to physicaly and mentaly abuse me. it became worse during my pregnancy , and i miscarried. After this he became better for a while and has only hit me twice in serious arguments. i still can't get over how he treated me and even tho...
A. 1 May 2011: Why on earth are you still with him? If he hit you only once ever, you should leave him. "Only hit twice" it twice too many. He will keep hitting you. It will get worse. Will your death be the only thing that gets you to your senses?
He's ... (read in full...)
My purity ring is not stopping me feel so turned on. What can I do to slow down these feelings?
Q. Why am I so turned on when I see my boyfriend? I'm 15, but I've never felt like this before! I know one reason is hormones? Anyways... I've never felt like this with anyone else. It's freaking me out. Maybe another reason is that he told me I turn...
A. 1 May 2011: Heh, you're learning that your hormones have no rings. :)
Well, there are some healthy ways to slow down the feelings.
One is to masturbate, to put it plainly. If you have a vent for all that sexual tension, it will take a lot of pressure ... (read in full...)
The fact that my GF was not a virgin when she met me, is breaking me down.I cant handle this relationship anymore...
Q. Ive being going out with my girlfriend for nearly two years now and early on in the relationship i found she wasnt a virgin. This was painful for me to hear for two reasons: 1-I belive that you should lose your virginity to someone you love and want...
A. 1 May 2011: First of all, I understand that you were upset that she lied to you. No one should lie about their sexual history especially about their virginity. In my opinion, having prior experience isn't something to be ashamed about, but you're right, it's ... (read in full...)
The fact that my GF was not a virgin when she met me, is breaking me down.I cant handle this relationship anymore...
Q. Ive being going out with my girlfriend for nearly two years now and early on in the relationship i found she wasnt a virgin. This was painful for me to hear for two reasons: 1-I belive that you should lose your virginity to someone you love and want...
A. 30 April 2011: Really? You want to kill yourself because SHE wasn't a virgin? You didn't mention whether or not you were a virgin when you had sex with her.
Also, you found out early on that she wasn't a virgin? Why not save yourself lots of therapy by break... (read in full...)
Why do so many marriage end in divorce? what can I do to ensure my marriage is as solid as my parents?
Q. Hi all, First off let me say that I'm coming at this from a teenage perspective and as such an outsiders perspective. As you may know the divorce rate in the USA is around 50per cent for first marriages. Though my own parents are not divorced (Ma...
A. 30 April 2011: I can't say that if you follow my advice, you'll divorce-proof your marriage forever. However, you can be very choosy when it comes to certain qualities in a potential mate. Here are a few:
1. If you find a guy, consider his family. Did he c... (read in full...)
I feel short changed but should I be happy with my lot?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years and we have lived together for one year. He is 42 and I am 48. Before we got together he had not had a girlfriend for about 15 years. He said he had resigned himself to being single for ever. I think ...
A. 28 April 2011: You've been with him for two years and living together for one? He still has issues saying "I love you"? First of all, never make excuses for a man's inability to show intimacy. It doesn't matter if he hadn't had a relationship in 15 years (tha... (read in full...)
How do I confront my husband about his cheating?
Q. I've been married for four years and just found out he's cheating. It really breaks my heart because I think we are doing ok and he doesn't complain much. We have 2 kids. How do I confront him? I don't want to talk to the tramp his dealing with I ...
A. 28 April 2011: HOLD IT!
I know your instincts right now are to go and confront him, vent, and nail him to the wall right now, and trust me, you have every right to, and you will and should!
However, don't do that now unless you think about what you want th... (read in full...)
Crazy about an older man who is already in a relationship....how do I forget about him?
Q. Hello, I'm a 20 year old girl in love with a 16 yrs older man, who actually has a family (he is not married, but he has been in a relationship for about 6 yrs, and also has a little son). If he would be single, I didn't care about the age ...
A. 28 April 2011: First of all, good for you for knowing that you have to forget about him. I know it's not easy, but it's good and healthy!
One way to help forget about him is to wonder how his girlfriend and child would feel if he betrayed them.
Another way w... (read in full...)
My bf refuses to change his fb status, what can I do
Q. My boyfriend of 5 months won't change his FB status and I am angry!! Right now it doesn't say he is single, he has it blank on that line. I sent him a request to change his status on FB from nothing to "in a relationship" and link it to my page. H...
A. 28 April 2011: Congratulations. :)
Good luck to both of you!... (read in full...)
My bf refuses to change his fb status, what can I do
Q. My boyfriend of 5 months won't change his FB status and I am angry!! Right now it doesn't say he is single, he has it blank on that line. I sent him a request to change his status on FB from nothing to "in a relationship" and link it to my page. H...
A. 24 April 2011: Actually, I'm kinda on both of your sides on this one. I am also pretty private about things I say on the internet if my true name is attached to it. I probably would choose not to display a relationship status until I got married.
I would be... (read in full...)
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