Older man wont leave his girlfriend for me.
Q. I started an emotional and physical affair with a man I work with around this time last year. He started seeing someone about 3/4 months before me and him started talking. He's 15 years older than me,I'm 32 he's 47. We connected on a level I never ...
A. 17 January 2019: Let's hope so.
I wish you all the best for the New Year and your future.
Aim higher :)
... (read in full...)
Older man wont leave his girlfriend for me.
Q. I started an emotional and physical affair with a man I work with around this time last year. He started seeing someone about 3/4 months before me and him started talking. He's 15 years older than me,I'm 32 he's 47. We connected on a level I never ...
A. 12 January 2019: I hope you will KEEP putting yourself first. Even look for a new job so you can put him and the affair, the drama and waste of time in your past.
WANT more for yourself than be USED.... (read in full...)
Older man wont leave his girlfriend for me.
Q. I started an emotional and physical affair with a man I work with around this time last year. He started seeing someone about 3/4 months before me and him started talking. He's 15 years older than me,I'm 32 he's 47. We connected on a level I never ...
A. 6 January 2019: So much drama, OP
What;'s the point? If all these TEARS really meant that he cared DEEPLY for you, why on Earth would he then keep you as a "mistress" or side-dish?
Yes, I can see him being hurt that you FINALLY have decided that you DESERVE... (read in full...)
My step children's mother is creating problems
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles I need some advice please. Not sure where to go from here. I have 2 beautiful step children. They have just got back from a once in a lifetime holiday with their Mum. We didn’t know about this holiday at all as the...
A. 31 December 2018: If she doesn't abide by them either take her to court AGAIN, or have your solicitor/lawyer contact her with a letter saying she HAS to.
Also, I would look into finding a mediator, she is taking the divorce out on the kids for added drama to her l... (read in full...)
Is it ok to ask for a second date immediately? And when to tell about a chronic illness?
Q. Hi all, a quick couple of questions. I went on an date set up from an online site last night. I have been on 2 dates over the last few months and had sworn off it as I didn’t enjoy the process but she contacted me and I thought well why not, let...
A. 31 December 2018: I would ask her for a second date asap. And then plan the walk that you two talked about.
She already said yes, so why not? If she decides she doesn't want to after all, YOU can move on. And so can she.
As for chronic illnesses. That ... (read in full...)
I know I deserve better, so why am I so sad?
Q. I'm angry and sad. 5 days before I'm supposed to move into an apartment with my boyfriend he gets cold feet and tells me he doesn't think it's a good idea and says he wants to end the relationship. He confesses to me that he couldn't be hims...
A. 30 December 2018: Well, you are upset/sad because you thought you had something real with this guy, and apparently, HE didn't.
However, maybe YOU need to be a little more PICKY in your choice of men. You KNEW there were red flags yet you somehow thought that if ... (read in full...)
Accused of being antisocial for turning down a guy?
Q. My dad loves to accuse me of being anti social and saying "that's why you have no friends". We were at a friends place and there is a single guy there who I see a couple times a year. We aren't friends (acquaintances) and we do not share interests. ...
A. 30 December 2018: I agree with Ciar,
Stop telling them stuff that is REALLY none of their business. While they might think they are trying to "help" you be more social, all they are doing is making you feel bad.
You are under NO obligations to go to a concert ... (read in full...)
How do I stop crushing on jerks?
Q. I always crush on a guy who is kind of a jerk, but the type of guy parents love because he totally sucks up to them and looks really good on paper — smart, ambitious, handsome — but deep down, he is not the nicest person. He usually has a ...
A. 30 December 2018: Eh crushing on a jerk is not the worst you can do, at least you don't go date a string of them...
Men who comes off as Alpha males, strong, self-reliable, confident, sexy/hot, and maybe even cocky (and cruel) are for whatever reason somethin... (read in full...)
I think this guy is holding back from me.
Q. got into online dating. Had a couple of dates with a fab guy. i could see him as the one. maybe early but theres something so different in a fantastic way we have also taken it slow we chatted for 2 month before meeting. we have both deleted our ...
A. 30 December 2018: Yikes, then CUT all contact OP
He isn't worth your time if he can date you a while and then go I don't want a relationship... so what he wanted was a FWB? If so, don't settle for that.
... (read in full...)
Is his reaction to these comments a red flag?
Q. Hey guys! Hope everyone is well :) I recently entered into a new relationship. We've been "dating" for the last 2 months, and official for the last month. We have also already entered the "I Love You" phase. Everything moved very quickly, bu...
A. 30 December 2018: I don't think the whole "upset about boob comments" is a red flag. Someone talks smack (one way or another) about your partner I think it's pretty natural to be protective and not liking it.
I would, however, MAKE sure he knows you don't give a S... (read in full...)
Should I cut off my mom from my life without giving her an explanation?
Q. Guys... this new year I’m going to cut off my mom from my life. I have written a question regarding our relationship before and things have been going downhill from there. She has been mean to me and my family all year long. I have a sister w...
A. 30 December 2018: First off,
BLOCK both your sister and mother from your Facebook and do NOT give them the phone numbers of your BF. You know they like to stir of drama and YOU let them. Not sure why.
You mom has a clear favorite and that is your sister. Pro... (read in full...)
How do I change my patterns?
Q. I have come out of a very long term relationship where my partner 'parentified' me. I've read a lot about how there can be a passive / active dynamic (or divide) between partners, where one acts like the kid and the other is positioned as parent, ...
A. 29 December 2018: I'm with Code Warrior.
You need to learn to cut people lose. When you last ex started having ALL these expectations of you that YOU didn't AGREE to or want - like being responsible for EVERYTHING, then you NEED to not only recognize it, but know... (read in full...)
Should I stay friends with her?
Q. My close friend really confuses me sometimes. When we get too close she pushes me away...when i go far, she pulls me close. Intially we used to talk a lot over phone chats etc. Now she says she doesnt like it. She used to get jealous of other people ...
A. 29 December 2018: I don't really see what you get out of this, except drama.
She sounds manipulative and callous. Not really good traits in someone you call a friend.
Why waste your time, energy and friendship of this person? She is toxic.... (read in full...)
My new job demands much more of my time! Any advice?
Q. Three weeks ago I started a job in my career path that I’ve been praying for for a long time now. Great location for me, benefits, union, pay is good, the whole nine yards. I feel so overwhelming blessed for me and my family. The only downside to ...
A. 29 December 2018: My husband served 26 years in the Army. You can bet your bottom dollar that he missed out on a lot of family and social stuff.
And now that he is retired he is trying to play catch up a bit. Which is good for him.
You have gotten an opport... (read in full...)
Is ‘bird’ just slang for ‘woman’ or ‘girl’?
Q. When a guy calls you a bird is it just slang for woman/girl. I text a guy friend to rearrange meeting up as he wasn't feeling well and joked that it was nurses orders for him to get better and that I couldn't find a nurse in uniform emoji t...
A. 29 December 2018: Bird, over all (as a slang term) is female. So not really categorized by age.
Like, dude. Dude has no age (or gender).
I you aren't sure what he MEANS by it, get him to elaborate?... (read in full...)
How can I ask my family to back off from my pregnant girlfriend?
Q. I’ve been dating my gf for 6 months. My family met her for the first time over the holidays and they weren’t very welcoming. When we met she had just found out she was pregnant. She also has a two year daughter. She left her ex because he was chea...
A. 29 December 2018: It is a big mouthful for your family to accept, OP
A young woman who has one child and another on the way, both fathered by some violent ex.
They are watching THEIR son give up the path/life he had to raise another man's children. And th... (read in full...)
He constantly needs reassuring and I am being turned off by it!
Q. Hi so I started seeing a guy about a month ago, he is lovely but lives like 400 miles away! I really fell for him, and him me, but he seems borderline obsessed with me, he got me presents for Xmas very sweet I thought, but he is very insecure and ...
A. 29 December 2018: OP, like you said, EVERYONE has been hurt at some point in life. It's UNAVOIDABLE. He is using past "hurt" as a way to excuse his behavior.
Maybe instead he should WORK on moving forward from that hurt BEFORE he is starting to date again. Presumin... (read in full...)
Older man wont leave his girlfriend for me.
Q. I started an emotional and physical affair with a man I work with around this time last year. He started seeing someone about 3/4 months before me and him started talking. He's 15 years older than me,I'm 32 he's 47. We connected on a level I never ...
A. 29 December 2018: Just keep moving forward. He made his choice long ago and it wasn't you.
Now you MAKE the choice to leave him behind and find someone SINGLE who ONLY wants to date you. Not juggle two women.
And then STICK to it, do not let him sweet talk you i... (read in full...)
My boyfriend regifted a present he had given to his ex
Q. My new bf gave me a regifted present! A mutual friend sent me a pic of his ex wearing this exact bracelet i received. Im so hurt and offended. I thought this person loved me. Who does such a thing? I am gutted. ...
A. 29 December 2018: Do you live with him?
If you do, maybe he thought he "had" you by the short and curly now, so he doesn't need to invest much in you or put in much effort...
Maybe it's time to find a place elsewhere to live. If you still want to date him, the... (read in full...)
Older man wont leave his girlfriend for me.
Q. I started an emotional and physical affair with a man I work with around this time last year. He started seeing someone about 3/4 months before me and him started talking. He's 15 years older than me,I'm 32 he's 47. We connected on a level I never ...
A. 28 December 2018: Is it you?
Not necessarily, but you DO allow him to STRING you along while dating someone else, she might not. You didn't back off when he started seeing you and was STILL seeing someone else. You accepted the "mistress" position. Which is why y... (read in full...)
Does he still like me? Am I over thinking?
Q. I ve been seeing this lad for a couple of months. We spend hours talking and he always asks about my life. On nights out he will.stay with me all night in the club rather than his friends. When people ask us what we are sometimes he says I m his mrs ...
A. 28 December 2018: Maybe spend time during the week? Like go on a date? For dinner or whatnot and not just meet up on nights out.
You don't really know him, he doesn't know you that well and you can not build or maintain a relationship over text.
... (read in full...)
My step children's mother is creating problems
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles I need some advice please. Not sure where to go from here. I have 2 beautiful step children. They have just got back from a once in a lifetime holiday with their Mum. We didn’t know about this holiday at all as the...
A. 28 December 2018: Like FA said,
YOUR (that being your husband's) only real option is seeking legal advice. SHE can not deny you guy to take them on vacation UNLESS she can actually document or prove WHY you can't take them.
Sounds like she just like a good dram... (read in full...)
I think this guy is holding back from me.
Q. got into online dating. Had a couple of dates with a fab guy. i could see him as the one. maybe early but theres something so different in a fantastic way we have also taken it slow we chatted for 2 month before meeting. we have both deleted our ...
A. 28 December 2018: I think you read it right. I think he introduced you to his best friend to get HIS opinion of you as well. Maybe he doesn't entirely trust his own judgement when it comes to women? Could be he has dated some women in his past that turned in to very ... (read in full...)
He constantly needs reassuring and I am being turned off by it!
Q. Hi so I started seeing a guy about a month ago, he is lovely but lives like 400 miles away! I really fell for him, and him me, but he seems borderline obsessed with me, he got me presents for Xmas very sweet I thought, but he is very insecure and ...
A. 28 December 2018: I agree, this is a "run for the hills" kind of scenario.
HE will not get "better" or more "chill". I think as much as you like certain things about him, you are better off looking elsewhere.
It's been a MONTH (ONLY!!) and he is this obsessed an... (read in full...)
I can't forget the guy I cheated with.
Q. About 6 months ago, I cheated on my boyfriend with a male friend. I won't go into details, but my boyfriend and I worked through it and I cut contact with the other guy. Today he sent me an email to wish me happy Christmas and said he misses me. I ...
A. 28 December 2018: Shit or get off the pot, OP!
Which is a crude way of saying MAKE your choice and stick to it. You can't have your BF and still keep the other in the wing.
If you WANT a future with your BF, CUT all contact with "lover-boy" and block him from c... (read in full...)
My boyfriend regifted a present he had given to his ex
Q. My new bf gave me a regifted present! A mutual friend sent me a pic of his ex wearing this exact bracelet i received. Im so hurt and offended. I thought this person loved me. Who does such a thing? I am gutted. ...
A. 27 December 2018: OK, that is thoughtless, cheap and quite frankly... inconsiderate.
It was HER bracelet and because she left behind he decided to re-gift it to you, so HE didn't HAVE to go buy you a present.
Sorry... no. That would not be OK with me. While I... (read in full...)
My ex saw my hairy nipples! Is that enough to end years of great sex?
Q. The other night I ran into my ex while drunk and went home with him. It was spontaneous and so I didn’t have time to “prepare” myself for him.. I didn’t sleep with him that night (although he tried, persistently) but everything seemed as it was...
A. 27 December 2018: I have to go with Code Warrior, JUST how hairy are they that you think it could be a GOOD reason for a guy to not wanting anything to do with you?
If they ARE very hairy and YOU don't feel comfortable with the hair, wax them. Talk to your doctor i... (read in full...)
Boyfriend lied about moving overseas to keep sleeping with me
Q. My Boyfriend and I broke up I'm very depressed this Christmas we had been together for a year with a 2 month breakup in between because he refused to tell anyone about me... He claims to be private I took him back because I don't believe he was ...
A. 27 December 2018: OP, you HAVE to take some responsibility here as well.
You keep making this about him and what HE chooses to do, like it's ONLY him who can make ALL the choices. IT'S NOT!
Someone who doesn't want to date you "in public" is not someone who will... (read in full...)
Male friend wants to discuss sexual fantasies ....he has a girlfriend!
Q. No, I am not looking to make him my boyfriend Just want to know if its normal for men with girlfriends to want to talk to their female friends about their sexual fantasies? he even asked if i had a boyfriend and when i asked why he said because...
A. 27 December 2018: Yeah, shut him down asap. He doesn't NEED to hear your fantasies NOR do you need to hear his.
It sounds like he is hoping he can find some leverage. Now if he was a close single male friend whom you had ALL kind of conversations with.. maybe it... (read in full...)
I'm flying 1/2 way across the world to see me girlfriend who is probably going to break up with me?
Q. For the past few months, I've been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend of 6 years. The long distance is supposed to last another 5 months. I'm planning to visit her next week for a few days on my way to a conference, and then again ...
A. 27 December 2018: I agree, pack up her stuff (the clothes and smaller items) and then drop them off at a friends house (if they live near you) - I would waste the postage to mail it to her. You already wasted enough on this.
As for the present you bought her, ret... (read in full...)
Should I give her a Christmas present for her son.
Q. Over the past couple of months i have been getting to know a really nice woman that i have met locally to where i live, she is 37, and im 42. We are taking things really slow at the moment as we both have a lot going on at present. Things are ...
A. 26 December 2018: Glad to hear it worked out so well!... (read in full...)
We had a fight my children's present are at my boyfriend's house and he won't let me get them
Q. My boyfriend ruins every Christmas and I don't know what to do. We went last minute shopping today which was his idea. In a supermarket he said he needed the toilet so I decided to cash in a scratch card while I was waiting. The till is right by...
A. 26 December 2018: Glad he didn't ruin Christmas for the kids, and honestly? Maybe it's better it's over... Seems like you dodged a bullet there.
Merry Christmas.... (read in full...)
Should I even try to remain friends with her after the way she acted?
Q. The other day I went to dinner with my friend who I actually considered one of my best friend so we were having dinner and it w and We ordered our food and both of ours took a long time to come but hers came before mine and she ate hers and she ...
A. 26 December 2018: I have to agree.
My guess is she wasn't upset that your food was late, she was upset that somehow SHE wasn't the center of attention and all the fuss wasn't about her.
So she pitches a fit a 5 year old would be impressed by, but no one else.... (read in full...)
Is my roommate pleasuring himself with my clothes?
Q. I have three roommates. Two of them, a man and a woman, are married. He doesn't give me the creeps or weird rape-y looks, and my gut feelings have always been spot-on in the past. However, this time, I think I have physical proof of sexual ...
A. 25 December 2018: I'll try and answer your questions:
"Is my roommate masturbating on my clothes?"
It's possible. I can't know for sure as I'm not there.
----------------
"If he is, does it count as cheating on his wife, and/or as sexual harassment towa... (read in full...)
My close relationship with my friends has changed ever since they had a baby
Q. Not sure what to do with my friends. We've been friends for a few years and we got on really well always having dinner together and drinks. Celebrating birthdays, Christmas's and new years together. We were really close. Then they announced they ...
A. 25 December 2018: Yep having kids changes your life, your life is tilted and turned upside down.
I didn't get more than 4 hours sleep a DAY with my first child for almost 2 years. Now IF I had been in my 20's it might not have mattered AS much but at age 30? Yeah... (read in full...)
She sent me a text saying "lets break up" but I didn't even know we were in a relationship???
Q. My close friend keeps refering to our friendship as "Relationship". Recently we had a fight and she texted me saying "Lets Break Up".Does that mean we are into a relationship?...
A. 25 December 2018: I agree with Code Warrior,
I would spell it out to her that you you weren't IN a relationship but if she wan'ts to have no contact, so be it, then you BLOCK her and move on.
Though it all sounds rather immature for a couple of "friends" in th... (read in full...)
My boyfriend regifted a present he had given to his ex
Q. My new bf gave me a regifted present! A mutual friend sent me a pic of his ex wearing this exact bracelet i received. Im so hurt and offended. I thought this person loved me. Who does such a thing? I am gutted. ...
A. 25 December 2018: Are you sure it's re-gifted? And not just similar? He might have thought that because the EX had liked her, you would like the same. Maybe because he doesn't know you that well he thought that the EX had good taste, he could repeat the giving a ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend buys another woman a puppy
Q. My boyfriend of five years ordered an unborn pedigree puppy for a female friend. She walks his dog when he is at work. During the time he sought out, and checked out breeders, I told him that I found this to be a highly inappropriate gift. During ...
A. 25 December 2018: Welcome back CMMP! Good to see you on again :)
OP, if you feel this is inappropriate, then you are within your right to end it as you did, but DO NOT use this as a tactics to see if he will "obey" your wish.
Just be done, if this is a deal b... (read in full...)
Is it possible to love 2 women the same way at the same time?
Q. When i was 13 i dated this girl, who we will call girl "A". After half a year she broke up with me. 3 years later i started dating one of her close cousin, which we will call girl "B". we ended up talking online and eventually getting together. Yes ...
A. 24 December 2018: No, I don't think you your case you love the two equally or in the same way.
Your infatuation for A is fantasy. What you have with B is probably more what you would call love.
You were with A for for 6 months at the age of 13.Pretty much "... (read in full...)
I'm really sad and discouraged with my life
Q. Anyone have any advice for someone in late 20’s. I have studied to high level, but don’t have job anymore. It’s been half a year, and I simply cannot afford anything. Friends kindly ask why I don’t have work yet,l. I guess that’s their way of ...
A. 24 December 2018: I'm sorry you have come to this point in life, but most of us have been there done that. The ONLY one who can dig out out of this hole, IS YOU.
That means ACTIVELY seek jobs EVERY day. Even settle for one that isn't what you studied for. Sometime... (read in full...)
Should I give her a Christmas present for her son.
Q. Over the past couple of months i have been getting to know a really nice woman that i have met locally to where i live, she is 37, and im 42. We are taking things really slow at the moment as we both have a lot going on at present. Things are ...
A. 24 December 2018: I think it's OK to give him a present. I like the Idea that you put from Santa on it. He is 2, doesn't know you but will probably love the tractor regardless of who it is from.
Putting "from Santa" makes it a light a nice gesture.... (read in full...)
My friend has gotten himself involved with a bad girl and I want to help him but unsure what to do
Q. I'm worried about a guy friend as he's got himself involved with a girl who is bad news. Hes started distancing himself from everyone who's warning him and is distancing himself from close friends She's a complete bitch sorry to say - take a mon...
A. 24 December 2018: What exactly do you think we (total Internet strangers) can do that YOU can't?
He is a grown MAN, he is RESPONSIBLE for HIS actions and choices. And he has CHOSEN to date this woman and take her back after the various break ups.
If you have t... (read in full...)
He wants to spend the rest of his life with me but without marriage.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for over a year. We have a child together. We are both divorced. We both have children from the marriages. We are in a serous relationship. He has talked about us getting a home together. He has said more than ...
A. 23 December 2018: What do you make of it?
That he tried the whole being married and it didn't work out for him. He will not legally bind himself to another person again.
But he still believes in monogamy and want a life with you, just without the marriage par... (read in full...)
Is collateral damage a side effect of online dating?
Q. I’ve been trying online dating for a little while with the goal of eventually finding a committed relationship. I haven’t actually met anyone in person (yet) but I have chatted with a fair number of people. Most of those conversations fissled out ...
A. 23 December 2018: Maybe accept that QUANTITY over QUALITY will get you no where fast after all.
I'd say talk to ONE person at a time that you feel there could be a connection with. Give it a few week and then meet up in person IF you think the person is someone ... (read in full...)
Is it possible to be a semi-reclusive artist and still contribute something of value to the local town? Please share similar experiences!
Q. Has anyone here got any experience of settling in a new country where you don't speak the language and are not sure how to fit in? I am thinking of buying a 2nd home - which I will spend about 6 months of the year in. I know that sounds extravaga...
A. 22 December 2018: I'd say MAKE an effort to learn the language. You wouldn't be the first artist to settle in a smaller town, though a town of 2,500 is tiny.
Will EVERYONE accept you? Probably not. Nor do they need to. you might put their town on the map (in a sm... (read in full...)
I'm flying 1/2 way across the world to see me girlfriend who is probably going to break up with me?
Q. For the past few months, I've been in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend of 6 years. The long distance is supposed to last another 5 months. I'm planning to visit her next week for a few days on my way to a conference, and then again ...
A. 27 November 2018: I agree with Auntie BimBim,
Since you are going there for work/conference and you "think" she wants to break up LET HER make the busride of 4 hours to come see you to dump you... It's only fair.
My guess is she won't she will just end it over... (read in full...)
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