| A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: The other day I went to dinner with my friend who I actually considered one of my best friend so we were having dinner and it w and We ordered our food and both of ours took a long time to come but hers came before mine and she ate hers and she was almost done that’s when I asked the manager That was passing by what happened to my flat bread because it’s been an hour and since my friend was alreadyalnost done with her her food manager said oh I’ll go check on it and he brought me a complementary salad which was very nice and I told him it was OK and that you don’t even have to do that but he insisted and he brought a salad I start eating the salad and my friend then finished her food so she goes wow your flat bread is still not here if I were you I would just go ahead and cancel it by now since we’ve been here for an hour so when the server came by I told her hey I’m just gonna go ahead and cancel It server said OK got to go to my manager then they both came back and the manager said oh well here’s the flat bread and I’m not gonna charge you for it do you want me to pack it for you to take home it was their fault iand he apologized that the restaurant had forgotten to make it and that took so long that it shouldn’t happen so then I said OK I can even pay for it I feel bad not paying for it But the manager insisted and then my friend started getting really mad and she’s after the manager went to go box it for me she said oh my goodness you’re embarrassing me I can never come to this restaurant now the server is probably going to fraud my credit card I don’t know why my friend would react this way she made me feel really awkward and I wasn’t trying to get a free meal but that’s how she made me feel although I did offer the manager to pay like two times and the manager kept on saying it’s OK it’s on us merry Christmas it was the restaurants fault now my question is why was my friend acting this way we then had the most awkward walk to our cars and she still hasn’t talked to me she told me because of me she can never go back to the restaurant and blah blah blah blah she even snapped at me when I tried to tell her I don’t know why she’s being like that...the reason why I even met her up that day was because she told me she was depressed and having a bad day I dont know what to do if I should even still be her friend after the way she made me feel and I wonder why she reacted that way she is known for burning bridges with everyone and also I’m like her only friend
View related questions:
best friend, christmas, depressed Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2018): I just don't get why she acted that way. Last year me and my friend were on holiday and she sent back lasagne twice because she wasn't happy with it, in another one she sent back a glass of Chianti because she mistakenly thought it was Rose wine, why would i care that she did??
I think that your friend seems to struggle with her moods and how to act appropriately with people, that is highlighted in her saying she suffers from depression and was in a bad mood that day, it's a poor excuse, she should not have gone out if she was going to act shitty.
No her behaviour and reactions are down to her own doing, if you want to forgive her if she apologises that is entirely up to you but you have nothing to be sorry for, her attitude was like kick the dog because i am in a shitty mood, not an excuse is it?
If she contacts you and you want to be friends with her make it very clear you will not put up with being treated like that, if she doesn't get back in touch, her loss!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2018): She's got issues. It's not your fault. Some people are just really weird. Theres a reason you're her only friend!
I say, don't mention it and just cool off and see if she reaches out to you or not. Then decide what to do based on what she does next.
I had a friend do something similar one time. We went out to celebrate my birthday, but she never congratulated me on my birthday. It was weird. Even while we were out, people were texting me saying congratulations, or even calling me to congratulate. At first I just thought, well she's her with me celebrating, so in a way she's congratulating me through action and not words, so I let it pass. But then she just asked me "do you like it when people congratulate you?" and I said "yes, I think its nice. And then she STILL did not congratulate me.
To this day, I have no idea what was up with that, and not long after this we stopped speaking. She was also one of my close friends and she'd never done anything "weird" like that before, so who knows why.
My guess is that she, like your friend, just didn't feel like being friends any more, but had no idea how to "break up" a friendship, and so they just got weird instead and acted strangely, maybe hoping that we would be the ones to end the friendship so that they wouldn't have to.
I wouldn't take it personally any way. People change and grow and develop and some friendships were never meant to last.
...............................
A
female
reader, Ciar  + ♥, writes (27 December 2018):
 Cut her loose. No final goodbyes, no explanations, no drama. Just ghost her. Block and delete.
If you cross paths in public, be formal and courteous the way you would with any acquaintance.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2018): Her first mistake: starting to eat before waiting for your meal to arrive.
Second mistake: not sticking by you when you complained to the waiter about the delay in getting your meal.
Third mistake: getting angry and nasty for no reason and accusing you of embarrassing her.
Advice: don't contact her again till she contacts and apologizes.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2018): I think this whole thing has been blown out of proportion. Your friend's opinion doesn't matter. You were the one inconvenienced; and you were the one dealing with the situation. It didn't require her two-cents one way or the other.
I want you to stop and think. Does this incident rise to the level of dissolving a friendship? I guess that depends on whether you both equally value the friendship.
I don't get why she can't return to the restaurant? Why would they fault her in anyway? Unless she has had some sort of altercation or incident of her own she hasn't mentioned to you.
If you say she has a bridge-burning policy among friendships; I'm not sure how she earned the honor of being your best friend? It would seem things should have collapsed before now. Maybe this is it?
...............................
A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious  + ♥, writes (26 December 2018):
 You're her only friend? Well, what a surprise! Who else is going to put up with behaviour like that from a supposed adult?
The restaurant handled the mistake really well and YOU handled your side really well by being gracious and offering to pay, even though your offer was declined. You obviously also voiced your appreciation, which was polite and courteous.
Your (ex) friend, on the other hand, behaved like she had never been in a restaurant before. I am sure, with that attitude, her business will not be a great loss to the restaurant.
In your shoes I would simply not bother contacting her again. If she contacts YOU in the future, perhaps that would be a good time to tell her YOU found HER behaviour extremely embarrassing and immature, and that you do not wish to be put through such a scenario again.
Stay the nice person you are but don't let people like her use and abuse you. You are worth better.
...............................
A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (26 December 2018):
 She’s complaining because the manager offered you a free meal because the restaurant messed up? I don’t get her logic here. If she wants to act like a baby then let her, I don’t understand her side of this at all.
...............................
A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (26 December 2018):
 I have to agree.
My guess is she wasn't upset that your food was late, she was upset that somehow SHE wasn't the center of attention and all the fuss wasn't about her.
So she pitches a fit a 5 year old would be impressed by, but no one else...
Let her burn this bridge, you can't have a true friendship with someone who acts like a brat and throw first over random stuff YOU had NO control over.
If she feels she can't go eat there again, well TOUGH tittes! I would go back there because they did the right thing by YOU. Though the whole.. 1 hour delay.. not great but stuff DO happen.
Let her sulk and pout... and if you decide you don't need this kind of drama... just let her go.
...............................
|
