I'm keeping it light and my options open, does this make me a bad person?
Q. Hi, so I’m a single mum, I’ve been on my own for about 7 years now, I haven’t dated in a few years as I just couldn’t be bothered anymore. But recently on a Facebook group I’ve met two men, I like them both, and they are both aware of each other, ...
A. 12 December 2018: How will you get to know these guy if they both live far away? Over text? Facetime?
So getting into a LDR?
And yes, at some point if you WANT a relationship to function, to have a real future you kind of have to spend time WITH the other p... (read in full...)
Date wanted me to add him as a friend when I did he said I didnt need to
Q. I went on a date this weekend and had a great time. The man i was with said he wants to see me again. We had been chatting on social media and i decided to add him as a friend. When i checked if he had added me he had changed his settings so i ...
A. 11 December 2018: Maybe he was being polite, but then realized he might be going a bit too "fast" for his own liking.
Adding people that you are getting to know is not a bad idea, HOWEVER, I would wait until there is a few more dates under the belt, that you two ... (read in full...)
I showed interest in a shy guy, now he wont leave me alone.
Q. I've been acquaintances/friends with a guy from work for about 9 months, we weren't really close but had a lot in common and chatted when we saw each other. He's in his thirties and openly admitted once to not being good with women. Anyway we were ...
A. 11 December 2018: I agree wiht Code Warrior,
Be kind and gently and tell him you don't see the two of you as a good fit, and that you think dating a coworker would be a mistakes as well. And then STOP jerking him around for your own benefit! You have quite enjoyed ... (read in full...)
I'm keeping it light and my options open, does this make me a bad person?
Q. Hi, so I’m a single mum, I’ve been on my own for about 7 years now, I haven’t dated in a few years as I just couldn’t be bothered anymore. But recently on a Facebook group I’ve met two men, I like them both, and they are both aware of each other, ...
A. 11 December 2018: If they BOTH live far away is it really realistic to pursue this?
Are you in any position to move (and still work) near one or the other? Do you really WANT to relocate? Uproot your child and yourself?
I mean, an LDR is not exactly optimal ... (read in full...)
The neurosurgeon I have met online says he wants a dominant woman.
Q. Hello everyone. I’m 41 and just strarted looking to online dating 4 years after divorce. I started chatting with this incredibly smart and handsome guy. He is 47 and a neurosurgeon. Never been married and no kids. We both have the same religion and ...
A. 10 December 2018: No one can tell you how it would be to date this guy.
He is talking fantasy - HIS fantasy of a submissive housebound wife who can also be dominant sexually. He isn't looking to be the SUBMISSIVE one all the time, just with sex (if I read your pos... (read in full...)
I'm keeping it light and my options open, does this make me a bad person?
Q. Hi, so I’m a single mum, I’ve been on my own for about 7 years now, I haven’t dated in a few years as I just couldn’t be bothered anymore. But recently on a Facebook group I’ve met two men, I like them both, and they are both aware of each other, ...
A. 10 December 2018: I think as long as they KNOW you talk to the other and STILL want to talk to you, it's not an issue.
But WHEN/IF romantic endeavors - like romantic dates, sex (even cybersex, if you are into that) happens then you need to consider how YOU would fe... (read in full...)
I'm attrached to my close female friend
Q. My closest friend, who is a female (I’m male) likes girls, but I really like her. Sometimes I get this vibe that she likes me too and could be bi, and I’ve indirectly asked her and she says “She’ll date whoever she wants to date”. I don’t know wha...
A. 9 December 2018: I think if her attitude is “She’ll date whoever she wants to date” - and NOTHING romantic has happened between you two, then it's not likely that she feels the same way as you.
You have a crush on her. That doesn't mean that SHE will feel the same... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is generous with his mum and friends, but miserly with me
Q. I have been in a relationship for 6 years, we are put in outer late 20's. My boyfriend does not like to spend money on me but I find journals of all the expenses he pays for his mom, including a car he just bought her. He does not help me clean an...
A. 9 December 2018: You aren't married so HIS money are HIS.
Spending money on you, doesn't mean he loves you, and NOT spending money doesn't mean he DOESN'T love you.
But for a couple who has been together for 6 years... it seems odd that it hasn't moved muc... (read in full...)
My younger boyfriend just asked me to marry him
Q. I'm 31 years old woman divorced with 2 kids one of whom have a a disability. I've stayed away from relationships all together because my life is not easy and I have my priorities. Lately, a younger man started to show interest in me, he is 5 ...
A. 9 December 2018: Tell him it's too soon for you to give him an answer, that you feel it's all moving too quickly for you.
BE honest.
You didn't mention how long you have been dating, but I think you need to consider WHAT is best for your kids AND you. Is ther... (read in full...)
Does my FWB want a relationship or is this just a power play?
Q. I know this site is filled with people wanting their fwb/ fuck buddy to be something more but mine has started telling me I need to open up to him more and trying to get me to admit I have a crush on him. Is this him trying to have a relation...
A. 9 December 2018: Ask him straight out, ARE you looking to date me?
But only IF you want to date him. So make up your mind first, then ASK him.
What do you have to lose? A "FWB"? Not really a great loss if it ends, is it?
It's impossible to tell if he... (read in full...)
2 months before our LDR is to end and we are to be together my fiance breaks up with me. Why?
Q. Dear cupid , I was engaged for almost 1 year and a half , my fiance and i had a long distance relationship, he is deployed and at the end of this year we were planning to start wedding planning and for him to stop deploying and settle down , bu...
A. 9 December 2018: First of all, it's not uncommon for soldiers to break up before a deployment. And to act a bit out of character leading up to a deployment. Especially of he is going to a war-zone.
The LAST thing (most of them) want/need is drama and trouble ... (read in full...)
I can't get my ex to leave me alone
Q. So, I was engaged to a guy and we broke up a year ago. So, my ex is military he moved to Germany while I live in the U.S. it was a toxic relationship. When he was in the U.S. him and I we’re together for two years. We broke up and got back together ...
A. 9 December 2018: My advice,
If you DO NOT take some serious actions, this can escalate into something VERY unsafe. YOU need to make sure that you inform him as "clinical" as possible that you want NO further contact. And if it doesn't stop you will go through ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend ignores me for days after simple arguments.
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together almost 8 years. One thing that is bothering me more and more is that if she gets mad at me (such as if we're arguing about something) she will ignore me, sometimes for days. Last night we went for dinner ...
A. 8 December 2018: If this is a pattern of behavior from her, YOU have to decide if that is something you NEED to discuss with her, or if it's a deal-breaker or something you can live with.
The likelihood of her "changing" her behavior is pretty slim. Obviousl... (read in full...)
Found out GF had 4some and 3somes with people I know
Q. Hello, I just found out my girlfriend of 6 years had multiple threesomes, and even a foursome MMMF. She was dating one guy but had sex with his three friends without him. When he found out she offered to have sex with him and another guy she was ...
A. 8 December 2018: How does it affect you? Directly?
Is it because you don't like some with a "larger" sexual history than yourself?
Or because you KNOW some of the men who had sex with her?
Or because she basically cheated on that ex with 3 other men? Or was... (read in full...)
My ex sent my nastiest most private messages on social media for all of my friends to see
Q. Hello. I left an emotionally, verbally and ultimately physically abusive relationship. I will not sugar coat and say I did not lash back out. I hit him back and screamed and cursed back stooping to his level instead of leaving. This went on for 10 ...
A. 7 December 2018: This is about him. OP
You are just convenient ammo to feed his need for attention.
To fight with a partner at the end of a relationship is really not uncommon, for anyone. To do it over text? Not smart but again, I would guess in today's world... (read in full...)
I don't know when to cut off this FWB relationship?
Q. I have been dating a guy for three months now. He is quirky and fun, we have had some adventures and I enjoy my time spent with him. But my particular situation, I am only in my current location for 2 years and then I am moving away. Because of this ...
A. 6 December 2018: If you don't want to continue, then just end it.
Let him go so he can find someone to actually date. And you cab focus on your life and future.... (read in full...)
New boyfriend gets upset because I wont let him move in.
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for 11 months now. Previously married for 5 years. Our relationship has been rocky to say the least but we have come to a crossroads suddenly. He lives with his mom and they are getting evicted. He isn’t working at ...
A. 6 December 2018: I think you already know what to do.
IT IS smart not let him move in. He can't contribute financially and you are a single mother. Which means if he moves in without having an income, the EXTRA costs of having him live there is taken "out of your ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend likes me to do the same things as porn stars but I don't want to
Q. My boyfriend wanted to try something new and now wants it all the time. He likes when I kneel in front of him with my mouth open and tongue sticking out, then he cums on my face and in my mouth and tells me to swallow as much as I can like they do ...
A. 6 December 2018: Ah, no OP
YOU do not OWE him pictures of that nature or... ACTS you don't want to do.
I think you need to get out there and find yourself a job ASAP so you can stop feeling you owe him anything.
You are so young to be "trapped" in this kin... (read in full...)
How can I be subtle and hint that I'd like him to ask me to the prom?
Q. I really want to go to prom with this guy. He means a lot to me and so I really want to go this dance together because I think we can take our relationship to the next level if he takes me. he is a really amazing guy that i've been flirting on...
A. 6 December 2018: "Prom season" is anywhere from March until June. So you have a few months.
And I think you need to hold your horses. You talk about "taking YOUR relationship to the next level"... but you aren't dating. So in essence you are NOT in a relation... (read in full...)
My ex sent my nastiest most private messages on social media for all of my friends to see
Q. Hello. I left an emotionally, verbally and ultimately physically abusive relationship. I will not sugar coat and say I did not lash back out. I hit him back and screamed and cursed back stooping to his level instead of leaving. This went on for 10 ...
A. 6 December 2018: That is what he WANTS you to feel. He knows exactly how to push your buttons, not just to your face but to everyone you know.
I don't know if this constitutes harassment in Canada, but I would advice you to go to the Police.
Secondly, I t... (read in full...)
Am I being too harsh on my 17 year old daughter? How do I deal with her?
Q. I am having trouble with my 17 year old daughter. We've recently returned from a trip to Europe and are jet lagging. It being the weekend, I texted her at 11am to see what she wanted for lunch. She replied that she was still sleeping. At 2pm she ...
A. 5 December 2018: So she does know HOW to perform simple chore, GOOD. Then just simply INFORM her when you are home she can CONTINUE to do her own laundry.
And start teaching your son as well. SHE shouldn't be "mom" when you are away, but of course she can help out... (read in full...)
I love him and want to stay with him, so why can't I let go of these fears that my marriage wont last?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. He's 23, I'm 25. I'm the first girlfriend he's ever had, he's my fourth relationship. Everything with us is pretty much perfect. I've never had a relationship this comfortable before. It seems like ...
A. 5 December 2018:
Children are, regardless of popular belief, a LIFETIME commitment, same as marriage (for some), religion (for some).
There will be good times, and not so good times. That's a fact, that is reality. That is life.
Sure, it's not easy to say... (read in full...)
Is this relationship even worth working towards if she is so secretive about her past?
Q. In July I met a girl at work, she had just moved to my very small hometown a few weeks before we met. She is 23 and has a 1 year daughter. We quickly became friends and I started crushing on her at the same time. She very quite but lots of fun once ...
A. 4 December 2018: Don't pursue a relationship. Stick to being friends. she isn't ready for it, isn't ready to share or open up.
She doesn't OWE you details of her past. NOT an iota.
And don't snoop. That is pretty low.
I GET that you are curious, I get that ... (read in full...)
I love him and want to stay with him, so why can't I let go of these fears that my marriage wont last?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. He's 23, I'm 25. I'm the first girlfriend he's ever had, he's my fourth relationship. Everything with us is pretty much perfect. I've never had a relationship this comfortable before. It seems like ...
A. 4 December 2018: Amen to Code-Warrior.
Happily ever after doesn't exist. Not that you can't HAVE a happy marriage for 45+ years, but it TAKES work, commitment, trust, and compromises.
I never thought much about marriage, really. But I DID agree with my husband ... (read in full...)
Am I being too harsh on my 17 year old daughter? How do I deal with her?
Q. I am having trouble with my 17 year old daughter. We've recently returned from a trip to Europe and are jet lagging. It being the weekend, I texted her at 11am to see what she wanted for lunch. She replied that she was still sleeping. At 2pm she ...
A. 4 December 2018: I have 3 teenage daughters, who DO their own laundry and have done for a couple of year (sure, they don't do ALL their laundry all the time), but they each have a hamper in their rooms and I DO NOT empty those, or wash them, that is on them.
My mi... (read in full...)
My boyfriend of 3 years doesn't want to have children. I dream of having them
Q. Hey everyone. So ive been with my boyfriend a year now and we started talking about kids i commented how good he is with his nephews and how hed make a great dad one day to which he said he doesnt want any children. This crushed me as he knew from ...
A. 3 December 2018: He isn't going to change his mind. He is 40. He probably has a VERY good idea whether he wants kids or not, just like you.
I had my youngest at 35. I feel it was WAY late. She was smaller then my other two, and now at 14 do have some medical ... (read in full...)
Is this a sex addiction?
Q. Hello. I think I am sex crazed. I want to have sex all the time. When I get home from work. In the morning. When we are showering. And when we are out, all i think about is how I can't wait to go home and have sex. We are both extremely sex...
A. 3 December 2018: I disagree Anon,
Having sexual thought or fantasies about OTHER people than your partner is NOT abnormal. It's what you DO with those thought that can be OK or not OK.
She isn't acting on them. She just recognize that she NOTICE other sex... (read in full...)
Should I ask her out or wait until the divorce is final?
Q. I am very interested in asking out a woman with whom I have developed a nice freindship, including some flirting. The difficulty is that she recently filed for divorce. Some people say I should wait until it is final...others say go for it. I would ...
A. 3 December 2018: Nope, wait until it's final and maybe then some.
JUST because there is a filing for a divorce doesn't mean she is ACTUALLY over the soon-to-be ex husband.
You are jumping the gun here.
You will either end up as some sad rebound or involved ... (read in full...)
How do I stop the constant thoughts my husband will cheat when he's out of town?
Q. My husband left for Florida to visit his mother for 2 weeks. I could not go because it's the holiday season and our company does not permit vacations in December. Usually we go together in January but my husband is starting a new job in the new ...
A. 3 December 2018: Has he cheated before?
Why do you think cheating is something he will do?
And why are you married to a man you think you can't trust?... (read in full...)
I had an affair with my boss
Q. I had an affair with my boss. We are both married. It was clearly an emotional affair for five years and then we crossed the line. I know it was wrong and there’s different reasons on both sides why we went down this path - not an excuse though. His ...
A. 2 December 2018: Stop focusing on him. But on yourself.
LOOK for another job and then switch workplace so you can cut all contact.
What he is saying and what he is doing isn't necessarily the same. Saying he doesn't love his wife but is only staying until th... (read in full...)
Is this a sex addiction?
Q. Hello. I think I am sex crazed. I want to have sex all the time. When I get home from work. In the morning. When we are showering. And when we are out, all i think about is how I can't wait to go home and have sex. We are both extremely sex...
A. 2 December 2018: I don't really see the problem here.
If you BOTH have to same "wants" and "desires" and level of libido, I think it's all good.
You were lucky to have your first time with someone whom you care for and who obviously cares for you. It was also... (read in full...)
I work as a cam girl but don't want my boyfriend watching other cam girls
Q. I work as a cam girl on a website. This is actually my second job to make extra cash. My boyfriend was aware of this before we started dating. Few days back he thought that since I was working as a cam girl it made it ok for him to join one of t...
A. 2 December 2018: Are you a hypocrite?
I kind of think you are. you are totally OK with OTHER women's BF's looking at you and paying you... but your BF can't look or pay another woman. Because in your logic THAT is cheating, where as what you do... is work.
... (read in full...)
I feel like I need her permission to leave the relationship. Is she crazy?
Q. Hi everyone, I need advice about a girl who I think is totally crazy. I am 26 and she is 33. Bit of an age gap but she seemed very nice so i thought i'd give her a chance. I decided now I don't want to be with her but I want to know if I did an...
A. 1 December 2018: How do you get rid of her?
My advice, don't try this "ghosting" thing with her. SHE isn't taking the "MASSIVE hint" of you blocking her, so you might HAVE to spell it out.
So, while you have tried to tell her no, she isn't listening. YOU m... (read in full...)
Our sex is becoming just sexual gratification for his sordid fantasies!
Q. I need help. I'm concerned about my boyfriends sexual orientation/preference. We have been dating for 4 years now, as the 4 years have progressed his sexual habits have changed. He isn't tame , it's always got to be depraved , he's always got to ha...
A. 1 December 2018: Does he watch too much porn ? Perhaps.
Does it matter? No, like the first anon said, you two are incompatible sexually and YOU are making all the "sacrifices" and compromises for HIS enjoyment sexually... that is a SURE way to "kill" your libido a... (read in full...)
Why do people start dating when they are not over their exes?
Q. Or get into relationships for that matter. I'm dating a few guys at uni, and the number who are clearly just looking for a re bound or keep bringing up their exes is disgusting. And I know people who've even gotten into relationships with people, ...
A. 1 December 2018: Because they HOPE someone else can "help" them get over the last relationship faster.
OR
They aren't really ALL that concerned with other people's feeling, just their own.
OR
They don't want to be alone or lonely.
Yes, in perfect World... (read in full...)
I think my crush found out I like him and now he's avoiding me
Q. I have a crush on this guy ( let’s call him K ) We used to study in the same class. I went to another class now so we don’t see each other often. Back when we were in the same class, he used to talk to me and tease me a lot. I think he liked me, but ...
A. 30 November 2018: Nope, don't ask her and remember that you CAN NOT trust someone you don't know well with personal info like that.
SHE might like him too and used the info to make HIM think you are full of yourself.
As for him, keep being polite but try n... (read in full...)
I want to approach her but don't know how to talk to her
Q. Hello , I am in my 20's male, I recently got admitted to a new college, And I met a girl who I really fell in love with, But Im scared to talk to her because I am an introvert from childhood, and I get nervous when I talk to people, and screw up my ...
A. 30 November 2018: Start out slow, OP
Like greet her when you see her, maybe introduce yourself. Make it short and sweet every time you meet her. When you feel more confident in talking to her, ask her out for lunch or dinner.
... (read in full...)
I want first date to turn into relationship
Q. I have been doing online dating for the past 4-5 years. I have made a couple of friends from it which was a bonus. I have been chatting to a guy for a few week now and are meeting this weekend. He had had really bad health over the last 3 month and ...
A. 30 November 2018: You need to learn to chill, OP
JUST relax and try and go with the flow. It might be that in person YOU don't like him as much as you thought you would.
Dating is a process. A process of elimination. You meet someone, get to know them OVER t... (read in full...)
How could he treat me so badly and now act like nothing bad ever happened between us?
Q. Hi 6 years ago I met the man of my dreams I was madly in love with him and things were going well after a year of been together I fell pregnant and miscarried the baby the next day my boyfriend kicked me out of his flat no explanation as to why he ...
A. 30 November 2018: First off, OP I hope you have re-defined you idea of a "dream man" because no man worth a damned would kick his GF out right after she miscarried UNLESS he knew she has cheated or something worse.
As for talking to him... why would you? And as f... (read in full...)
He's extremely possessive and mentally abusive but I still love him. Advice please!!
Q. Hi. I am new to this so very nervous. I really need some advice about my partner. I have been with him for just over a year and I feel like I can't do anything right. He mentally abuses me constantly..well this is what I'm guessing it is?! He will ...
A. 29 November 2018: Good for you.
And remember any name he "calls" you, is not a reflection of you... but of him.
I would also find a big box and start putting ANYTHING that is his into it. If possible have a male friend/family member drop it off at his mom's hou... (read in full...)
How to deal with a needy friend who’s staying over the Christmas?
Q. (sorry I've just realized how long this post is) She’s a friend I’ve known all of my life. Our fathers were best friends. She has always been extremely needy and I’ve dealt with it and not always in a good way (meaning that I would often say ...
A. 29 November 2018: Yikes!
Well, first of all since she already bought the ticket you can't really un-invite her THIS year. But you CAN after the holidays are over, let her know that you can't do it next year (if she turns out to make things "horrible" this year.
... (read in full...)
Parents moving- what should I do with my pet?
Q. Need some help please on a family related issue please.. My parents have been alcoholics since I was little and I had a hard upbringing. The only thing that really helped me growing up at home was having my pet dog alongside me (he's mine since...
A. 29 November 2018: Maybe consider contacting a "old dog sanctuary" like https://www.oldies.org.uk/ and see if they can help you out.
If not, then you have to consider 2 options, taking him in YOURSELF and give him the best (of the rest of his life) that you CAN prov... (read in full...)
He's extremely possessive and mentally abusive but I still love him. Advice please!!
Q. Hi. I am new to this so very nervous. I really need some advice about my partner. I have been with him for just over a year and I feel like I can't do anything right. He mentally abuses me constantly..well this is what I'm guessing it is?! He will ...
A. 20 November 2018: Give him 30 days to find another place and then EVICT him (if he has MAIL going to your place you might NEED to evict him - so DO figure out what the LEGAL process is.)
Once you get the ball rolling it might get "easier for you.
It's really n... (read in full...)
He's extremely possessive and mentally abusive but I still love him. Advice please!!
Q. Hi. I am new to this so very nervous. I really need some advice about my partner. I have been with him for just over a year and I feel like I can't do anything right. He mentally abuses me constantly..well this is what I'm guessing it is?! He will ...
A. 17 November 2018: I hope you do walk away and BLOCK all contact.
This isn't a loving person. This isn't love.
And let's for a moment... entertain that what he is saying is true.. that you don't understand him at all... or don't show him enough love.... THEN WH... (read in full...)
He's extremely possessive and mentally abusive but I still love him. Advice please!!
Q. Hi. I am new to this so very nervous. I really need some advice about my partner. I have been with him for just over a year and I feel like I can't do anything right. He mentally abuses me constantly..well this is what I'm guessing it is?! He will ...
A. 14 November 2018: If he was that great guy that pops out every now and then, you wouldn't have the abusive, manipulative and controlling behaviors at all. He would just be a decent guy.
Your man, on the other hand, KNOW that in order to keep a woman hooked you need... (read in full...)
He's extremely possessive and mentally abusive but I still love him. Advice please!!
Q. Hi. I am new to this so very nervous. I really need some advice about my partner. I have been with him for just over a year and I feel like I can't do anything right. He mentally abuses me constantly..well this is what I'm guessing it is?! He will ...
A. 13 November 2018: Good GRIEF, woman!
What exactly do you love about him?!
Misery likes company, HE is misery. Does mean HE is miserable. No, he quite ENJOYS making YOU miserable.
He is trying to isolate you. First from your job (so you would be TOTALLY dep... (read in full...)
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