Could these have been semen stains ... is he cheating on me?
Q. Hi guys. I just need some advise. I’m driving myself mad and keep toying between am I just being super paranoid or is my gut instinct trying to tell me something... basically I want to know show I be weary of my partner! We have been together ab...
A. 27 February 2019: YOU need to deal with this ASAP or you will lose him. NO ONE, I will repeat, NO ONE will accept being accused of things they didn't do and continue to feel loved and continue to love that accuser.
He will have a breaking point. And then you will... (read in full...)
I'm 64 but still frightened of my dying mother.
Q. My elderly narcissistic mother is dying in hospital and after a violent abusive childhood, I hate having to see her. She's an embittered, difficult, hard to please woman and I feel very nervous in her company. I'm 64 now, yet still frightened of ...
A. 27 February 2019: I'm so sorry you even have to DEAL with this.
My advice? Make your visits short and "sweet" show up, gauge her mood, if she is being mean or in a bad mood then extricate yourself after 5-10 minutes. YOU DO NOT owe her to sit there and be abused. ... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and work part time. My husband wants me to get another job to pay his parents debts.
Q. My husband's parents owe a large amount of money to a family member which they can't pay. They have asked my husband to pay the money on their behalf, we are talking £500 per month for the next 10ish years. My husband works 9 to 5 and I work part ...
A. 27 February 2019: How are YOU responsible for a debt of 60,000 that his PARENTS have made?
How much do you think YOUR kids will go without because you two are paying 500 a month? You will soon have 3 kinds under 5 and if money is tight with just the 4 of you, hav... (read in full...)
I don't know what this man wants from me
Q. I am a lady in my 60s and have been in an on/off relationship with a guy of similar age for 5 years. We usually fall out because I get hurt that he has not included me in his family get togethers or not bothered to get me anything for my birthday. ...
A. 27 February 2019: I wish you all the best, OP
And remember this isn't about YOU not being enough or giving enough. It's HIM that wants to NOT be tied to anyone but he STILL wants someone to fuss over him (like a wife, GF or partner would). He is a "taker" not a "g... (read in full...)
I don't know what this man wants from me
Q. I am a lady in my 60s and have been in an on/off relationship with a guy of similar age for 5 years. We usually fall out because I get hurt that he has not included me in his family get togethers or not bothered to get me anything for my birthday. ...
A. 26 February 2019: OP, you are seen as someone he can rely on to FUSS over him. All he had to do was call you and tell you he was sick and ALL the crap stuff he did in the past was "forgotten". He got you a Valentine's card... Oh my, a whole 50p? and then magically he ... (read in full...)
I am so confused..looking for insight about this relationship..
Q. I met someone 6 weeks ago. Im in my mid-40s and spent too long in a loveless, abusive marriage. Ive been alone for 3 yrs and was resigned to being done w men for good. I have trust and abandonment issues and have settled for weak, passive ...
A. 26 February 2019: You two a re toxic for each other.
Honestly, OP While I APPLAUD that you SAY you don't want to change him, THAT is exactly what you are trying to do. and yourself in the process.
If he has to be DRINKING to spend time with you, YOU are not the ... (read in full...)
Starting out in serious relationships: Coping with "forever" ending and trusting the next "forever"?
Q. Please bear with this question. I'd really appreciate supportive answers, rather than blunt or patronising answers, if possible :-) I've only been in one relationship and it did feel like it would last many more years than it did, though it lasted...
A. 25 February 2019: Most people who uses the terms forever mean it when they say it. The I will ALWAYS love you, we will make this work and grow old together. It's quite often said with the INTENT of "honoring" it.
The thing is, people who are SO busy looking ... (read in full...)
How can I help this relationship survive?
Q. I am 40 F,3 years ago I met a 21F College student that was on a internship.(Asia)- I Never dated woman before. At the time I was in a leadership role within the college. She made passes and I resisted, because I was nervous, scared and becau...
A. 25 February 2019: Nothing in your post really shows a relationship that EVER worked or will ever work out.
I'm sorry, that is probably not what you want to hear.
It sounds like you two are at two VERY different stages in life, she IS only 21 and it shows. Regard... (read in full...)
My ex still has our couples pictures on his facebook. I want them deleted.
Q. why is my ex keeping my pictures (our pictures together) on his facebook account and says in relationship with me? He broke up with me 6 months ago. I do not want him to keep my pictures on his profile, I blocked him but can still see his ac...
A. 24 February 2019: I'd just contact him and ask him to delete them. Then give him a week or two to do so. If he doesn't see if Facebook can help you.
BUT DO stop stalking his social media. It isn't helping you.... (read in full...)
How do you maintain a positive attitude when nobody seemingly has any interest in you?
Q. Hi there. I'll try and keep this brief and to the point. I'm 27 years old and have only been on 1 date which wasnt all that great. Never had a long (or short term relationship) but I always tried to tell myself I dont want to be in a relationship ...
A. 24 February 2019: How do you maintain a positive attitude?
By improving yourself. BECOME someone YOU'd want to date (so to speak). Get out of the house and socialize. Doesn't mean go to bars and drink, but hobbies, sports, etc.
Join meetup groups. Not for ... (read in full...)
Somebody keeps hacking my boyfriend or is he cheating?
Q. I keep finding my boyfriend on multiple dating/cheating sites and find his search history is filled with things like: Women near me to have with tonight? I have asked him about it and he says he didn't do it. Tat someone is hacking him. Is that ...
A. 24 February 2019: Honestly, WHO would hack him to go on dating sites?
BUT his SEARCH history...? Don't be so naive. ONLY way for someone to use his search engine (computer memory) would be to remote hack his computer. And really, IF someone were doing that..... (read in full...)
I broke up with my violent boyfriend, he wants the ring back but I paid for it!
Q. I have just broken up with my boyfriend of twenty years due to his violent behaviour. the thing is he says he wants the ring he bought me back which is expensive but I feel like in all fairness I have paid for the ring as I gave the cost of the ring ...
A. 22 February 2019: Just be careful, either way.
And if he has your number, change it or if you can, block his.
YOU don't NEED to talk to him.
If he does threaten you, CALL the police.
Be safe.
... (read in full...)
Does a heart break months after the relationship ends?
Q. I dumped him a month ago and I have been doing okay ...I actually thought I had it easy this time ...until this week when it seems his haunting my thoughts every second ...Does a heart break months after the relationship has ended? ... I dumped him ...
A. 21 February 2019: Since you still keep in contact with him, you OFFER him a an open doorway.
So BLOCK him and have no more contact with him. He isn't going to change who he is. And you know that. No one changes overnight or in a month.
While you KNOW he is bad f... (read in full...)
I just got married and I feel that my marriage is already breaking
Q. Dear cupid I just got married and already feel like my marriage is failing, to be precise nothing changed i.e we were living together even before marriage so it's the same. But my husband emotional support is almost none to these days Most of ...
A. 21 February 2019: Why did you think things would change JUST because you married each other?
That isn't realistic.
But that is also hindsight, I suppose.
So what do you do? Well, you can decide if this is working for you or not. The relationship was not wor... (read in full...)
I’m in an exclusive long distance relationship, despite my desire for it to be open, and I started cheating. What do I do?
Q. I’m a freshman In college and am doing long distance with a boy I started dating about a year ago (during my senior year of high school). I truly believe that I’m in love with him, as I dated a boy before him and learned the difference between ...
A. 21 February 2019: You should break up with your BF because you aren't ready or mature enough for a REAL relationship.
If you have so little self-control that you fuck some guy "because you are drunk" even though you have a BF, and then DO it again AFTER having a... (read in full...)
I broke up with my violent boyfriend, he wants the ring back but I paid for it!
Q. I have just broken up with my boyfriend of twenty years due to his violent behaviour. the thing is he says he wants the ring he bought me back which is expensive but I feel like in all fairness I have paid for the ring as I gave the cost of the ring ...
A. 21 February 2019: If this is really a choice between your safety or a ring, I think... you should consider your safety.
If he knows how to get a hold of you to demand the ring back, then he can find you.
If he has your number (and you haven't blocked him and ... (read in full...)
I’m scared to talk to him about my desire to have children! Help?!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together for a year now and we're both very happy but there's one thing that I feel scared to talk to him about and it's the subject of children, he's had relationships in the past that have ended badly and this worries ...
A. 21 February 2019: Tell him.
And also BE realistic with a time line. It might be WAY too soon for him to consider kids yet. If he is as young as you.
And DO consider whether you would marry the guy or not FIRST. I think people have kids with people they can'... (read in full...)
Is this flirting behavior from my doctor?
Q. I have just been detecting a vibe. He is a bit touchy feely, like he will touch my hands (playing with my fingers) or my shoulder, and sit close and lean in. He also runs hot and cold. If I am serious he starts to flirt or if I start to flirt he ...
A. 21 February 2019: I have to agree with WiseOwlE he is being totally inappropriate, unprofessional and unethical.
A DOCTOR doesn't flirt with his patients. Not a doctor who is just a BIT smart and a bit professional.
My guess is this is how he treats MANY of h... (read in full...)
He played games with me and I need your help to understand why!?
Q. I am a mature person (not perfect and have many flaws, I am only human), I met this guy who was 10 years older than me 4 years ago, I told him I did not want not want to go out with him as my previous relationships have broken down and they have ...
A. 21 February 2019: Amen to Code Warrior!
There is NO way any of us can know why he is acting like a sick bastard.
My guess, and it would ONLY be a guess, it that he actually ENJOYS hurting you.
I lied and said ALL the "right" things to get you to date him, ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend often makes me feel inferior and I am not sure if I see a future with him. Please help?
Q. My boyfriend of 5 years and I had a huge argument recently. I mentioned applying for a 6-month advisory governmental job in another town. He got very angry and said he doesn't want to do long distance again (we had done it for a year internationally ...
A. 21 February 2019: I think if this is common for him to do when you HAVE arguments or disagreements, it's to try and keep control OVER you.
In a sense IF you believe that you are as dumb as he TELLS you, you are, then you are not likely to surpass him in the futu... (read in full...)
Am I fighting a losing battle? She is still speaking to her abusive husband!
Q. So... there's a woman I've been talking to for a little over a month. And when we're together, things are good for the most part. The problem is... this woman is married to a man that she has been involved with for a few years. He has threatened h...
A. 20 February 2019: Yes, you are fighting a losing battle.
You want to "save" her from this horrible man and marriage, but the thing is SHE is married. Which means she REALLY is unavailable to YOU.
You have only been involved in this for a month. ONE month. So yo... (read in full...)
I really like her and want to continue communication with her, but she’s on holiday! I don’t want to put a foot wrong, so I need advice!
Q. Hey everyone, This feels really pathetic but any advice will help. Basically I’m messaging a girl who I met a few weeks back. She lives just over an hour away and i met her on a night out. Since then I went back the following weekend to see...
A. 20 February 2019: Remember OP,
You can't clap with one hand. And you CAN'T make someone like you.
She knows you are keen.
You need to learn your own value. It's OK to give and take, but if you are ALWAYS chasing, ALWAYS giving.. it's just one sided and you d... (read in full...)
Our sex life needs improvement but how do I approach it because he gets upset and feels bad!
Q. Hi, I have been with my boyfriend for a year and 2 months, our relationship is good the only thing that kinda sucks is when we do it.. I'm his first but he isnt mine, when we do it he never takes the time to make me wet, he just goes and spit and...
A. 20 February 2019: Tell him NO, foreplay first.
No foreplay, no sex.
He spits? to get you sufficiently lubricated? EWWW!
Keep your CLOTHES on until you are rearing to go. Tease him and dare him to get your motor going with only using his hands, and you get t... (read in full...)
I get angry over little things, and he thinks that’s dumb!
Q. Hi I've been with my boyfriend for a year and 2 months. Our relationship is good and I'm happy with him.. but I dont seem to stop getting mad over tiny things, or sometimes i get mad at something and he thinks its dumb or that i shouldn't be getti...
A. 20 February 2019: Maybe learn to count to 10 (or 20) before you let that anger out of your mouth.
Don't you think it's a TAD - well HUGELY ridiculous to get mad over a freaking emoji? I mean WHAT the EVER F!
So what if he PREFERS to use ONE or TWO heart emoji ... (read in full...)
My husband wants "space" to deal with his feelings of anger towards me
Q. Hello, I am a mother of 3 wonderful children. My husabnd and I have been married for over 10 years. I love him dearly. Recently he has asked for "space." Claims his job and our marital issues are overwhelming him. Says he loves me but doesn't ...
A. 19 February 2019: Sometimes a trial separation is what can move these kind of broken marriage forward, to either a divorce OR reconciliation.
I would, however, MAKE it a LEGAL separation. And I would set up some ground rules as well. Like, NO dating other people i... (read in full...)
I’m bi, my friend is straight, but she said it was okay to flirt with her! What does her behaviour mean?
Q. I am bisexual, turning 18 in March. I have a friend, who I think I am in love with... I told her I liked her but she told me that she is straight. But she also said before all this shit, that it's okay to flirt with her. One time, she and my ot...
A. 19 February 2019: OP, stop beating your head against a brick wall.
You might LIKE her, but she doesn't like YOU in "THAT" way. She NEVER will.
She likes the attention you give her, but she also likes to tease and hurt you. Not really something a GOOD friend woul... (read in full...)
I'm dating a restaurant owner who's 10 years older and struggles with money. Is it worth it?
Q. Hi everyone, It's a bit long but please be patient with me. I'm currently dating a restaurant owner for almost a month. We met a supermarket and he took courage to ask me out on a date. We really hit it off after the first date and continue ...
A. 19 February 2019: One thing that is usually true, is that whatever issues or challenges you have when you START OUT dating someone is usually the thing/issue/challenge that ends it too.
It SEEMS like you are doing ALL the footwork and all the orbiting here. YO... (read in full...)
Do you think he’s basically telling me to leave?
Q. So last night my S/O and I got into an argument. We were at walmart leaving and our daughter stopped to whine about getting some gumballs so I wasn't paying attention to where I was walking and accidentally bumped into the entrance doors of the ...
A. 18 February 2019: Does he want you to leave? I'm not sure, might be that he just doesn't know WHAT to do, what to say. I think he knows you would rather listen to your mom at this point than him. He has admitted defeat.
However, he doesn't exactly sound like you... (read in full...)
Do you think it's possible to build a relationship over feelings for a different person?
Q. I've recently started flatting with five other people. One in particular, I'll call him S, I didn't know very well, so I assumed everything would be fine and we all signed on for a years tenancy contract. That was maybe 8 months ago, and during t...
A. 18 February 2019: I think it is an unhealthy and unfair way of getting over someone.
You are BASICALLY using the new guy to get over S. How would you feel if some dude were using you like that? Not great, right?
It's not the new guy's job to try and "fix" your c... (read in full...)
I really like her and want to continue communication with her, but she’s on holiday! I don’t want to put a foot wrong, so I need advice!
Q. Hey everyone, This feels really pathetic but any advice will help. Basically I’m messaging a girl who I met a few weeks back. She lives just over an hour away and i met her on a night out. Since then I went back the following weekend to see...
A. 18 February 2019: Back off while she is away.
LET her enjoy her holiday with friends.
Go out with your own friend or get busy with work and hobbies.
SHE knows you are keen. So just leave the ball in her court.
TBH, while I'm NOT a big texter it would DR... (read in full...)
I’m falling out of love, but can’t manage to walk away! Any advice?
Q. Hi everyone my name is James, i am currently in a 9 year relationship. For the last few years i felt like ive fallen out of love with my girlfriend. I am the only source of income in the relationship. Im very ambitious she is the complete opposite. ...
A. 18 February 2019: I understand that you want to make sure you leave her and her daughter in the best "conditions" as possible but I think a whole years worth of finances is, well a bit much. It's kind but it will ONLY enable her to NOT even TRY to get on her feet, at ... (read in full...)
He tells me I insulted him by asking if he was gay! Help?
Q. Hello. Recently the man I live with have been acting strange.We had a lot of arguments and he crossed boundaries and spent a lot of money from my savings account.We kinda broke up but we still live together because he said we should make it ...
A. 17 February 2019: You know the relationship is over.
You have snooped on him and found things you wither didn't understand or like, like gay porn. Which I don't know if many straight me watches gay porn, I'm pretty sure bi-sexual men might and men who are in denia... (read in full...)
Is my husband crossing a line in his interactions with female friends?
Q. Hello, Should I be concerned with how my husband interacts with certain females? Example: he was discussing valentines plans with a coworker and when she asked if he was doing anything, he said no. It isn’t entirely untrue because we didn’t go out...
A. 17 February 2019: I don't really see anything improper here.
Not giving her details of what he is doing for Valentine is not needed as it REALLY isn't her business WHAT he chooses to do for you or not do.
Lying about helping someone with an app... Pretty la... (read in full...)
How can I deal with my anger?
Q. Hello I am preparing myself emotionally and physically for life in my mid 30”s. My twenties were a series of parties - insecurities and putty fears with occasional breakdowns Throughout my self reflection I have noticed that I get angry very qu...
A. 17 February 2019: You can't change OTHER people, but you yourself can change things about YOU that you aren't happy with.
I'd suggest two things,
1, Yoga. It's just good for mind, body and soul. You will learn relaxation through yoga. And no, I'm not saying y... (read in full...)
Both of us are married and planned a future together, but then she chose him! How can I heal?
Q. A co-worker of mine and I started talking/flirting. Both married but unhappy for our different reasons. We wanted to help each other with the attention we werent getting at home and made promises to not fall in love. Well we did.. we kept a ...
A. 17 February 2019: Set your wife and yourself... free and get a divorce. It's NOT fair to keep being married when YOU don't really WANT to be with your wife. She DESERVES to be free to find someone who will love her and be faithful TO her.
And you, OBVIOUSL... (read in full...)
My lazy partner seems to think my car is also his!
Q. Me and my significant other been together for 12 years When it comes to working, he’s a little lazy and wants easy jobs like uber, Postmates, etc. me on the other hand, I’m a worker, went to school completed my bachelors degree while being with...
A. 16 February 2019: Just say no.
If he wants a car, he can GO buy one and pay for it.
How hard is that?... (read in full...)
He doesn’t want to see me but won’t let me go!
Q. I’ve been texting this guy off and on for the past 5-6 months. We’ve met and hooked up a few times. He will text me every morning, “Good morning beautiful, sexy etc” and we have conversations through out the day up into the evenings. But we go ...
A. 16 February 2019: I don't believe that HE won't let you go. YOU won't let HIM go. Because you like him.. Not sure WHAT in the World it is you like about him, the cancelling on you? That not really want to spend time with you in person? The not really wanting to be in ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend’s ex-partner is a nightmare! I feel like we are constantly looking over our shoulders!
Q. My boyfriend's ex partner is a nightmare - and I feel like we're constantly looking over our shoulders. Me and my boyfriend have been together for almost a year. Things are great between the two of us and we are very happy. The problem we have ...
A. 16 February 2019: Well, honestly?
It really depends on what she says about you. If it's name calling like slag/twat... whatever... I'd SIMPLY ignore it. Not much you can do about that.
If they are libel (Libel is an untrue defamatory statement that is ma... (read in full...)
My ex and his girlfriend have teamed up and are cyberbullying me on Facebook and Instagram
Q. My ex and his gf are bullying me online and I don't know why. I do not talk to my ex at all and I have moved on. I got a message on IG of her telling me to stay away from him which is weird because I don't have any contact with him and I am living ...
A. 16 February 2019: You need to 1. contact Facebook and two heighten your FB security.
The old FB page you don't use... DELETE it, so they can't go fishing for drama there.
The reason she "hates" you is because HE has talked so much smack about you. These two a... (read in full...)
How do I show this man that I'm worth having a relationship with?
Q. How does a woman show a man shes worth having a relationship with, ive been on quite a few dates with a guy but he said he wants to sort himself out a job , own place then maybe a relationship with someone. The words he used were someone he didnt ...
A. 16 February 2019: I wouldn't bother, OP
I think this is his way of saying he isn't INTERESTED in something serious WITH YOU.
If he WAS really interested in dating YOU and not "someone" he wouldn't start mentioning goals or parameters for his life. He would j... (read in full...)
My mom is being really overbearing regarding my wedding and it's taking a toll on me
Q. This isn't about my relationship with a partner. This is about my relationship with my mother who has been extra attached and possessive with me because my older sibling never became close to my mother and avoids her. Due to which I have always ...
A. 16 February 2019: I'd sit her down and tell her if she doesn't STOP, you and your fiance will "just" elope.
Explain that HER behavior is making you not want to do all this wedding stuff with her.
BE honest.
However, your mom IS your mom and will likely not ... (read in full...)
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