I feel so betrayed, what should I do?
Q. I am finding life difficult to live at the moment due to how my now ex betrayed me. I was with him almost 15 years. In December he came to see me said he wasn't in love with me any more,didn't know what he wanted in his life etc. I asked if he wa...
A. 24 June 2009: Don't waste so much time on his "new" woman. Concentrate on yourself and the kids. I can understand that it makes you wonder, but really you will never know, so why waste time guessing?
No matter what, you really did get the good end of the stic... (read in full...)
Boyfriend can't get over the exs?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend and I have been dating for about four months. We've been through a lot together in these short months and are very close to each other. He wants to move in but I'm hesitant to let him move in right away. We have some issues t...
A. 26 May 2009: If he won't leave and your name is the only name on the lease you can change the locks. As far as his fish well you can ( I would suggest this) have a third party there on a set date and time for him to pack his fish up and the rest of his shit. If ... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken, confused and don't know what to think or do
Q. My boyfriend who is in the middle of his divorce decided to go away for one week to Europe after finding out I had gone on a date several months after we started dating. At that time, December 08/January 09, he had been acting standoffish, distant ...
A. 12 May 2009: I'm sorry you are still hurting. I did understand that he told you he was seperated when you two met. Seperated and divored is not the same. Seperated means STILL married with a LOT of issues going on. So not only is the man highly unlikely to ... (read in full...)
Am I stressing over nothing? He's not texting me back
Q. hey all i met a guy a week ago he is 10 years younger then me but we hit it off from the start, since we met we have seen each other 3 times. he still lives with his x in a shared house until the end of august. he has been texing me pretty ...
A. 11 May 2009: Have you tried to call him? I mean really you can not build a relationship on texting. ( if you ask me).
... (read in full...)
He still wants to be FWB
Q. Hey DearCupids, I've got a bit of an issue on my hands and need help. me and my boyfriend of 10 months have recently split, out of all the days he ended it on our 10 month anniversary. The main cause of the break up was due to distance, with m...
A. 11 May 2009: You are a smart girl to stay away from the FWB thing. It's never benificial if you have strong emotions involved.
Maybe you need to stop seeing him all together. Move on, let him go. ... (read in full...)
Does he know what he really wants .. me or her
Q. hey every1 ..my ex broke up with me 7 months ago during the duration of the breakup weve slept togther on a few occasions... to him it was a friends with benifits situation but to me it always felt like more ..im still madly in love with him and ...
A. 11 May 2009: He's using you because you let him :( Simple as that. She is far away and he has a great warm familiar body right there next to him.
Honestly, unless you like to have your heart ripped out on a weekly/monthly basis I strongly suggest you let him ... (read in full...)
Negative pregnacy test, but still no period?
Q. Hello all! I have a question and while I think I'm just going to have to wait a week or two more to find out anyways, I feeladvice could help. My period wasdue today. I typically have symptoms before menstration starts. Lower back pain, tender ...
A. 11 May 2009: Only way to be 100% sure of pregnancy is to do a bloodtest. Your period could be delayed because of nerves. The symptoms you are describing can also show up when pregnant.
However, if you don't want to be a mommy, USE prtection every time. It... (read in full...)
Is karma really going to be a bitch to me for what I did?
Q. Exactly five months and two days ago my ex-boyfriend and I were caught having sex... by the girl he was dating while we were doing so. They had just celebrated their two-year anniversary a day prior to this incident. Anyway, at the time, I didn...
A. 11 May 2009: I don't think Karma works quite like that, but you just never know.
What you did was callus and careless. You understand that now. Good, you learned something.
I think you need to stay away from that girl. You have done quite enough. However,... (read in full...)
I really don't like femdom but it seems a big thing for him..
Q. Alright, i'm so totally confused I need to ask for help - and help from males as well as females would be appreciated! My fiance says he's into D/s with me being the submissive, and says he hates dominant women, but sometimes when we're having sex...
A. 11 May 2009: I believe that at times (and with someone you totally trust and love) it's a good thing to overstep some limitations. When it comes to sex it has to be small steps, and you BOTH have to be comfortable with it.
I also believe that it IS ok to NOT w... (read in full...)
Boyfriend lives with his ex of 5 years
Q. okay so i have been dating this guy for 3 months now. I love him to pieces. only one problem his exgirlfriend of 5 years still lives with him they have been broken up for 9 months now. She is a lazy sloth who will not get a job and he pays for her ...
A. 11 May 2009: Is he going to be PCS'ing with you? If not, then I don't know what to say. He obviously like the living arrangement more then he says or he would have done something about it.
I have never understood the whole living with your ex.. unless MAYBE if... (read in full...)
Which color of Hydrocodone is the weakest?
Q. Okay me and my mom have looked everywhere and it tells you little things about it but we can't find my question so i hope some of you guys know. So my question is which color in Hydrocodone is the lowest to the strongest? cause i don't want one ...
A. 11 May 2009: Ask your doctor. He will know what dosage to put you on. ... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken, confused and don't know what to think or do
Q. My boyfriend who is in the middle of his divorce decided to go away for one week to Europe after finding out I had gone on a date several months after we started dating. At that time, December 08/January 09, he had been acting standoffish, distant ...
A. 11 May 2009: I really can't see why he would be ticked off that you went on a date.. THE man is married.
But really, this is the kinda mess you can get into when being with married men. They lie and cheat on their wives you really think it's so far fetched ... (read in full...)
He had an affair before we married... should I just come out and ask him if it's true?
Q. My husband Mark, and I have only been married for 5 months, we have a great sex life and we spend a lot of time together. A few weeks ago a female friend of mine that I have known for 6 years told me that she saw Mark with another woman at a ...
A. 11 May 2009: I don't see why you can't ask him who he had lunch with on such and such date, just be honest and tell him your friend saw him. Now if he denies it or lies, you might have some red flags waving.
I find it kinda odd that he would go have lunch wi... (read in full...)
My wife is telling everyone but me that we're getting a divorce
Q. Hi there, I found out my wife is telling all her friends that she is getting a divorce from me. She hasnt told me yet! It all started when she started to work for a fashion store and she started to go to clubs with the younger employees. I had no p...
A. 11 May 2009: To quote you: I think that I was too good to her and that I should have been less willing to sacrifice my time and energy to her maybe she would be more appreciative of me.
No no no. A man can never be too good to his SO/wife or visa versa. ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend can't get over the exs?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend and I have been dating for about four months. We've been through a lot together in these short months and are very close to each other. He wants to move in but I'm hesitant to let him move in right away. We have some issues t...
A. 11 May 2009: All I can say is...
Listen to your gut. ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend can't get over the exs?
Q. Hi, My boyfriend and I have been dating for about four months. We've been through a lot together in these short months and are very close to each other. He wants to move in but I'm hesitant to let him move in right away. We have some issues t...
A. 10 May 2009: I would tell him to figure out what he wants. You or the ex.
I don't believe in telling a BF/partner whom they can talk to and whom they can't but if they can not have respect for me I'm gone. Him hanging on to ex's like that is being disrespe... (read in full...)
Should I feel guilty about losing my virginity?
Q. Hello. I turned 16 in April. i lost my virginity summer of '08. i was 15. i am so confused on whether or not to feel guilty or pleased or secrative or URGH i just don't know. i told my mother today that i've had sex. the thing is- when it happ...
A. 10 May 2009: Will the guilt help you? Will the guilt give you a new hymen?
No and no.
Just understand that for a lot of women and girls having sex is a BIG thing emotionally and there is NOTHING wrong with that.
I can not tell you WHAT to feel. But I ... (read in full...)
Just another girl to his collection?
Q. its abit of a long questions but its pretty straight foward ive just added deatil. i had sex with this guy last night after going to the cinema, ive known him for about 5 months and weve been sort of liking each other, well ive liked him alot a...
A. 10 May 2009: You might jsut be another girl for his collection, you sure made that easy for him...
Don't feel bad about having sex with him, but understand every action has a reaction. Having sex with him might stop him from wanting to "date" you, if that is ... (read in full...)
My wife is telling everyone but me that we're getting a divorce
Q. Hi there, I found out my wife is telling all her friends that she is getting a divorce from me. She hasnt told me yet! It all started when she started to work for a fashion store and she started to go to clubs with the younger employees. I had no p...
A. 10 May 2009: Other then your kids why would you want to save this marriage? She already left it. She is holding on only til she can financially " upgrade" from you.
She is projecting like crazy. Telling you it's YOUR fault for reading her text messages... (read in full...)
Do I need to be less clingy?
Q. When my boyfriend isnt with me i miss him like crazy! I mean i just think bout him all the time. Even when im with my friends i just want to be with him! I know he loves me and i love him. Hes just more independent person than me. He likes times ...
A. 10 May 2009: Learn to be your own person. Learn to be able to do stuff by yourself (and with YOUR friends).
You know the answer.
Clingy and needy are never a good way to describe yourself..... (read in full...)
How do I tell him I just can't do this anymore?
Q. I was in a relationship with this guy for three years. He was my first boyfriend and I was very much in love with him. However, when I left uni, we decided to end it as I was going off travelling. He came to visit a couple of times over that summer, ...
A. 10 May 2009: No matter how you say it, it will hurt him a little. But dragging it out and stalling will hurt way more. Be honest.
... (read in full...)
He's soon to be a father and I don't know if I want to be with him now
Q. This guy and I have became close friends over the past few months.. he has admited to being very attached and likes me alot, but I never really thought of him that way.. lately, I have been thinking I might give him a shot because I always date ...
A. 10 May 2009: To be frank ( and speaking from personal experience) I would keep it at a friendship level til you feel more certain about it all. It's not like you are going to be an instant "step-mom" if you start dating, but the child and the mother will be a ... (read in full...)
He married someone else saying I wasn't wife material but now keeps contacting me
Q. My boyfriend who went on for an arranged marriage after 3 and a half years of our relationship is now trying to call me . He started doing this after a week of his marriage. What is his problem in life? I do not respond to his calls or texts. Why is ...
A. 10 May 2009: You are doing the right thing, do not take his call and block him ( if you can). He just isn't worthy. He made his bed, now he can lie in it and YOU can move on. You have to realize that you DO deserve better.
Be glad you weren't wife material... (read in full...)
Is my partner a nasty piece of work or just ignorant?
Q. Hi, I posted before about a have a problem that is causing me a lot of distress and since then things have got worse. I've been with my partner for 6 years now, during which time I have supported him through all sorts of problems, including a ...
A. 10 May 2009: For anyone to see another human being for only the tint of their skin or the slant of their eyes is not only stupid and ignorant.. it's pathetic, disrepectful, hateful.. I could go on and on.
Stop making excuses for him and let this one go. You ... (read in full...)
I feel so betrayed, what should I do?
Q. I am finding life difficult to live at the moment due to how my now ex betrayed me. I was with him almost 15 years. In December he came to see me said he wasn't in love with me any more,didn't know what he wanted in his life etc. I asked if he wa...
A. 10 May 2009: I can understand your hurt and your anger, but really you got the "good" end of this deal. It may not seem that way right now, but in the long run what good is this man?
If he owes you money take him to small claims court ( if it is more then $ 3... (read in full...)
How long, on average, should it take to 'get over' a 5 year relationship?
Q. Hi there, I'm looking for some advice about my relationship break up. My boyfriend and I were together for almost 5 years and about 3 months ago he caused a bit argument and walked out on me. We were always very close and had a strong connect...
A. 10 May 2009: There is no set model to figure out what lenght of time is the "correct" amount. It is ok to mourn the end of the relationship, just not to wallow in it for too long.
When YOU are good and ready to let go - even if there is "unfinished business... (read in full...)
Why do I care so much about what other people think of me?
Q. Well I have gotten over this girl I liked for a long time. Right now I actually hate her, because of all the mean things she did to me. It was hard, but I had to do it. I dont even look at her anymore, I want her to know I don't like her. Quite ...
A. 10 May 2009: I know at 13 popularity is big. In the long run though it means nothing. Be who you are. Be real. Stop wasting time "hating" another human being. Let it go.
Yes, she might say crap about you behind your back, yes her friends might do the same. No... (read in full...)
My ex has threatened to beat me up!
Q. I have a massive problem!! My ex-boyfriend Jack has threatened to beat me up just because I added his present girlfriend on Facebook. But I also know that he is cheating on this girl. This girl, let's call her Shelby, has told Jack that I've said ...
A. 23 April 2009: I agree that you need to save and print out whatever was "said" on Facebook. Both what you said, she said and he said.
Then you need to delete her and him of your Facebook.
Then you need to talk to your parents. If needed be you might have t... (read in full...)
I don't have much money but want to show him how much I care
Q. hi this might be a little bit strange but i was looking for an idea of something nice that i could do for my boyfriend like an out of the bedroom type of thing. the thing is he's at uni and has to study alot and i have to work crap shifts so we d...
A. 23 April 2009: Pack a really nice lunch and grab a blanket - take him out for a picnic. It can be really cheaply done but it shows you put in a lot of thought and love.
... (read in full...)
Infatuated with my married boss when I have a boyfriend too!
Q. I am 19 years old and I have a boyfriend of three years now. I just did something I am not proud of at all, but at the same time I can not stoping thinking about it... I committed into someone's affair! He is my manager-38 years old--3 children.. ...
A. 23 April 2009: I think having a crush on your boss is fine, but you two crossed the line. It needs to stop.
I would like Honeygirl suggested start to look for a new job. In the mean time you need to tell him it was a mistake to kiss him.
Re-evaluate y... (read in full...)
Married lover is blaming me for the destruction of his marriage!
Q. I know that there is a lot of dialogue on-line from women involved with Married men. I also know of the heartache most experience when it ends... My question is simple: has anyone been involved with a married man who swears he loves you and then ...
A. 23 April 2009: Sorry forgot to add, You did help destroy his marriage. You didn't think about his wife either, but 99% of the blame is with him. HE made the marriage vows with his wife, you were single.
You can say NO to sex even if the guy is a wonderfu... (read in full...)
Married lover is blaming me for the destruction of his marriage!
Q. I know that there is a lot of dialogue on-line from women involved with Married men. I also know of the heartache most experience when it ends... My question is simple: has anyone been involved with a married man who swears he loves you and then ...
A. 23 April 2009:
Chalk it up to a learning experience. Never cross the line with a married man. If he is willing to screw around on a wife and family, his morals are shot and his ego over inflated.
He blames you, because it is easier for him then to realize t... (read in full...)
My boyfriend affair has shattered my world and I need to know how to pick myself up!
Q. Dear Agony Aunt's My boyfriend had an affair on me in may of 2008. I found out about it in January of 2009. It shattered my world, I am now trying to put my life back together and I can't seem to stop thinking about it every day and every night,...
A. 23 April 2009: What you need to do is to first write down your thoughts and feeling. It helps your mind process what happened.
Secondly you need to understand that the affair was NOT your fault. Nothing you did MADE him cheat. THAT was a choice HE made.
Thir... (read in full...)
Feel like I'm being forced into sex stuff
Q. I am 13 years old and so far I haven't lost my virginity. I want to be one of the few teens who actually save it but like 2 boys wantsz me 2 lost it to them and I keep saying no and they ask me non stop and some other boys want me to suck their ( ...
A. 23 April 2009: I'm with Satindesire. TELL someone you trust.
Don't be alone with any of these boy. Or any boy for that matter. You are not ready for sex, and that is a GOOD thing. Don't ever sell yourself short.
If you want to save your virginity for ma... (read in full...)
Dated 3 weeks, he dumped me and now he hates me!
Q. me and my boyfriend went out for 3 weeks and then he dumped me. today he said he hates me. and he said the reason is when i seen him in the three weeks i only seen him for like 5 minutes but i actually seen him for 30minutes, but we were on holiday ...
A. 22 April 2009: If he says he hates you WHY on Earth do you want him back? Have some self-respect girl!
Just be glad that you didn't waste more the 3 weeks on this dude, you deserve better.
... (read in full...)
Devestated and Confused.........
Q. Devestated or Relieved: Dated this man 45, i am 45 for the past 4 years, we are both divorced. Things have been fine with little obstacles along the way, but we seemed to overcome them. He is quiet and stubborn and I am the nurturer but want ...
A. 22 April 2009: Nothing changed over night. I bet you if he wasn't such and stubborn ass he would have called already.
I don't think there is much you can do. I think what he did/said to you was so disrespectful that I most likely would never talk to him agai... (read in full...)
He said we had to be secret then asked out my friend and she said yes! Please help!
Q. I have been dating this guy from school but he wanted to keep it secret from everyone because he doesnt like people knowing his business. We've had lots of problems including when he asked my friend out on a date whilst i was supposed to be dating h...
A. 22 April 2009: You need to dump this boy - he's a player wanna be.
One thing I learned about boys and friends is this, NEVER let a boy come between you and a good friend. If the friend allow that, she just isn't friend material.
Look back and think about this... (read in full...)
Is my brother sleeping with our deceased brothers wife?? Dark secrets in the relationship?
Q. I have two brothers. One brother took his own life approximately six months ago and since then my other brother has formed a very close relationship with my decesaed brothers wife. So close that he spends everyweekend with her and sleeps at her ...
A. 22 April 2009: I don't know if he is sleeping with her or not, nor do I think it's any of your business really.
I can understand that you want to analyze your one brothers suicide and your other brothers actions, but when it comes to suicides I don't really b... (read in full...)
Why won't she get rid of the love letters from their affair?
Q. A couple of months ago my wife had a very serious and deceitful love affair. So serious that they were planning on getting married. He even lived at my house for a couple months I told him he could since he had no where to stay. Of course this was ...
A. 22 April 2009: It's a question you should ask your wife. And HOW it makes you feel is also somethign you should tell your wife.
If she can't let go of the letters, she isn't over him. It's that easy.
... (read in full...)
How can I apologise to my wife for the blunder I made 10 years ago?
Q. I need help to stop this major fighting I'm having with my wife. We're married over 10 years, and I did something stupid over 10 years ago when we were first married (no I didn't cheat). One of my stupid friends who's known us since before we were ...
A. 22 April 2009: You are screwed..
That is a MAJOR FARK up. I suggest that you ASK her what you can do to make up for it. I don't know what I would do if it had been me in that situation.
You are going to have to accept that she is totally pissed of at you... (read in full...)
I want to be with my husband and this other man too!
Q. I'm married. My husband is lacking though in the affection dept. now I'm not talking about worshipping the ground I walk on. I just want a love you or kiss in the morning before he gets up to start his day. I have talked to him several times and am ...
A. 22 April 2009: Blaming your husband is not right either. Nor is it jsut 1 persons fault when a married couple disagree. However, He is not MAKING you sleep with another guy.
What kind of marriage do you have if you can not be open and honest? If you want to ... (read in full...)
I'm confused about where to work, where to live?
Q. I don't know what to do. I left my last job a few weeks ago to start a job for the summer in wales but, I ended upcoming home again because the manager wasnt very nice. When I got back I thought mayb Id go and live with my brother and try that but, ...
A. 14 April 2009: I moved out when I was 17 ( spend a year abroad) then moved back home with my parents the first year of university. ( they drove me nuts lol) So I ended up getting an apartment ( I found a girl who needed a room mate). I was lucky and got a great ... (read in full...)
I'm married so why do I desire other women?
Q. why do i desire other women even though im married? when i see a women i can't help but look up and down at her and then i think of her like crazy! Why do I do this?...
A. 14 April 2009: You can look as long as you don't act. Men and women don't STOP looking at a beautiful/handsome gall/guy just because they get married.
Now if you get "happy pants" every time you look at some pretty girl you need to learn a few things about se... (read in full...)
I want to be with my husband and this other man too!
Q. I'm married. My husband is lacking though in the affection dept. now I'm not talking about worshipping the ground I walk on. I just want a love you or kiss in the morning before he gets up to start his day. I have talked to him several times and am ...
A. 14 April 2009: I think you need to put on the thinking cap here.
You are currently involved with 2 men. One is your husband and one is the "other man" ( yes I will call it involved cause you are emotionally attached to him).
WHAT do you want? Be honest.
Do... (read in full...)
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