Am I weird because I'm at virgin?
Q. Iv'e just turned sixteen and im still a virgin most of my friends arent. Does this make me weird? help!...
A. 18 May 2009: I agree with TasteofIndia.
Nothing wrong with being a virgin at 16.. AT all. I was 18, almost 19 when I had sex the first time, we had dated little over 9 months before we did have sex. I don't regret it, even so I wish I would have waited a... (read in full...)
Going to boot camp! Leaving the guy behind!
Q. I moved to california about 5months ago to start a new life. While I wasn't looking for love, I did find it. When we met, I made it clear to him that I was hesitant about rushing into a new relationship and that I would like to take things slow ...
A. 18 May 2009: I think you going to Boot Camp is a blessing in disguise. You two will get some time apart and maybe he will realize that he truly needs help.
You can drag a horse to the water but you can not make him drink. Same with your husband. He needs he... (read in full...)
Having sexual dreams..does this mean he does too?
Q. i keep having repetitive intimate sexual dreams about one of the guys i went to school with, he stays just up the road from me and i cant seem to stop dreaming constantly about him, i think he likes me in a certain way, but we hardly ever talk, as i ...
A. 18 May 2009: Having dreams about sex and even with someone you might never sleep with is totally normal. It doesn't mean that there is anything worng with your relationship.
Most likely your subconcience is a little pent up and it's letting loose while yo... (read in full...)
Relationship starts within two weeks of meeting and now he wants sex?
Q. I met this cute guy in my local gym two weeks ago. We had a little chat, two days later he asked for my number. I gave him and immidiately he told me he liked me and wanted me to be his galfriend. I didnt take him seriously at first because it was ...
A. 18 May 2009: NEVER ever let any one PRESSURE you to have sex. If you aren't ready and he CAN'T wait, he needs to move on.
I agree with Star, sounds like he wants you for the sex.
... (read in full...)
He has two children, am I being selfish and can this relationship ever work?
Q. Ok im 22 nearly 23, and just started dating a new guy who's 29, 30 next year....we got on so great then we had a heart to heart and i found out he has two kids from his last relationship aged 6 and 10.....im confused now! How could this ever wor...
A. 18 May 2009: I'm guessing he waited quite a while to tell you he was a dad. Maybe that is the confussion. I'm guessing he took his time trying to get to know you before telling you about having kids.
I married a guy with two kids and a beast of an ex wife. Lo... (read in full...)
I think I love her but she's so childish!
Q. i have been dating this girl for seven months and i have begun to love her.we are like 21 now.nearly everyday she behaves like a kid.if something goes wrong i am the one getting blamed. she often praises about herself that she is really pretty. her, ...
A. 18 May 2009: Don't expect her to change so she is what YOU want. Either love her as she is or move on. If it is just little things that drive you nuts about her, there is nothing wrong in talking about them, but don't make it out as she is always wrong and you ... (read in full...)
Divorce and dating.....
Q. How long should a person expect someone to wait on them if they are in the process of a divorce? Is it fair for the one waiting to date someone else?...
A. 18 May 2009: Emily's answers put it perfectly.
It's the "oldest" trick in the book of cheating married men, to tell the woman they wish to date "on the side" that they are going through a divorce. Then as the years go by the divorce still isn't final.. ... (read in full...)
I made out with another guy but am not going to tell fiance
Q. So, I have know my fiance for most of our lives. He's one of my best friends, but the other night I made out with this guy I've known for like 12 years (no sex, just making out). Yes, I was drinking, but I wasn't drunk. I only had one drink. I...
A. 18 May 2009: You should ask yourself why you are bent on sabotageing your upcoming marriage.
You already knew that cheating is one thing your fiancee find devastating, so why did you do it? Yes, I consider making out cheating, just for the record.
The oth... (read in full...)
Was he trying to brush me off?
Q. Always good answers on this site. I broke up with my partner of 12 years three years ago and a year ago he starting calling me. I flew to where he had relocated to test the waters only to discover that there was someone else he had been seeing. I ...
A. 18 May 2009: If you need him to send you some documentations then just call him and tell him that. He's moved on in his personal life, so maybe it's time for you to do likewise.
The fact that he played you once should tell you to not concern yourself with him... (read in full...)
Asked her to meet up but it went a bit wrong, now I've not heard from her.
Q. Hi all, just a strange situation goin on and would like some input. Ive been chattin to a girl and we arranged to meet up, then on the day of the date she kinda gets flaky to which i send her an email stating a few things to put her mind at rest if ...
A. 18 May 2009: I agree with Gina. TALK to her, not text her. Makes life so much easier when you don't have to try and explain everything twice.
If she is worried about meeting up with you, then make sure you suggest a nice public place, meet her for coffee, ... (read in full...)
Is paying strippers for a lap dance cheating?
Q. My wife and I are going on a trip to Vegas soon and I'm wondering if it's okay to pay strippers for a personal lap dance...or is that cheating?...
A. 18 May 2009: If you can do it in front of your wife with her consent and acceptance then no it might not be cheating.
But if you plan on going out on your own to have a lapdance then yes, I would consider it cheating. What's next? a hooker? a one nights s... (read in full...)
If I think he's cheating does that mean he is?
Q. I sure hope someone can help me or just tell me it's all in my head! OK here it goes: I was married for 16 yrs got divorced after finding out he was cheating ( He left me and his 4 kids for her) I tried to get back in the dating game only to be ...
A. 18 May 2009: I can't tell you if it is all in your head, but I do think you should trust your gut. Your gut tells you something is going on. Then most likely something IS going on. What is it exactly I can not tell you. But you do raise some interesting and very ... (read in full...)
Should I just accept that "boys will boys"??
Q. I've just started dating a guy who is very attractive and a huge flirt. He gives girls a lot of attention, and they give it back to him. Girls on Facebook are always asking him to hang out or call him, and every time we go out I catch him making ...
A. 18 May 2009: I have had a BF a lot like yours. He never cheated he never strayed. I was honest about how I felt with all the flirting but I think it was a reflex for him. He did try and cut it out a lot, but what it really came down to was trust.
I don't th... (read in full...)
Would sex be better for him if I acted more like a porn star?
Q. Would sex be better for him if I acted more like a porn star? We usually have great sex and I can tell he loves it, but I've noticed how in porn, women always moan quite noticeably. I understand this is all fake because there's no way that a woman ...
A. 15 May 2009: I agree with Satin. Take some time ( even if yo have t do this part alone) and figure out what gets you really going. Show him, teach him.
Faking ANYTHING is bed is detrimental to good sex. If you fake anything the guy is going to think he's a r... (read in full...)
Skipped almost two periods now...am I pregnant?
Q. Okey i really need help im 13 nearly 14 and i think im pregnant. the last couple of times me and my boyfirnd had sex we did not use protection as he pulled out before he came so i thought it would be okey but now im realy worried because i have ski...
A. 15 May 2009: Go buy a fast response pregnacy kit. Make sure you READ the instructions CLEARLY. If it shows up as negative, you should STILL get an appointment with your doctor.
The sooner you know the sooner you can either start the PRENATAL care or abortion... (read in full...)
Can I have an abortion without my parents knowing?
Q. Ok heres my question - At the age of 13 if you got pregnant can you go have an aboursion with out your parents coming with you or even knowing i would really like to know it would really help a situation i am in Thanks x...
A. 15 May 2009: I'm sorry you are pregnant at 13. I'm even more sorry that you feel like you can not talk to your mom or dad and get their support, love and help through it.
Whatever you decide, make sure you don't have to go through it alone.
... (read in full...)
Are we a joke? Should we end it once and for all?
Q. Hey all Ok I hve been with my boyfriend for the past three years, we have been tru a hell of a lot together but the problem is we cant seem to really make a go off things!! We really love each other and when its good its brilliant but when thing...
A. 15 May 2009: I wouldn't call it a joke, but not a very good relationship. First of all you two have MASSIVE communications failures over and over. Not good.
You two need to either sit down and work through ALL the kinks and LEARN how to actually communic... (read in full...)
Can someone explain what she means?
Q. Hello, Ive been with my girl for a month now, not long I know but its going really well which is great :) On several occasions shes told me she loves me, all well and good but it does seem too soon to say that. Anyhow, she called me last night...
A. 15 May 2009: Seems to me she has no idea how she feels. Some people use the "I love you" as a term of endearment but not really seriously. Maybe she "took" it back becuase she sensed you thought it was a bit much? Or because you haven't said I love you back. ( ... (read in full...)
Should I hire a PI to follow my wife???
Q. I found 2 texts on my wife's phone. 1 sent to her, and 1 was her reply. I checked her contact list and the text was from a guy named Jim. That's it, only Jim in her contact phonebook. His text was 'so, how do you like my hang-down?' My wife's reply ...
A. 15 May 2009: Other then the text and reply you saw have there been other red flags? What made you check her cell phone?
If there are no other red flags, I would ask her. Trust and communication are the corner stones in a marriage ( or relationship) if there is... (read in full...)
How can I stop this overwhelming feeling of grief and sadness, and hurt, and disbelief?
Q. hi I've been with a guy for 19 months - I did everything for him, he lived in my house, I fell truly madly deeply in love. Suddenly he texted me one day and said he wasnt coming back. I was left utterly heartbroken, depressed, the sadness when...
A. 15 May 2009: Well, a good start is to look at him and what he did to you. ( and to his new gf) Really what kind of man would treat a women ( or two) like that?
It is ok to mourn the end of a relationship, but you need to understand that wallowing in it is on... (read in full...)
I want to get out and live!!!
Q. Ever since I was about 14 I have always been in serious relationships! when I was 15 I got into a relationship that lasted 3 years and I got engaged! I finaly left him due to problems that had been going on for a while and had, had enough of it! but ...
A. 15 May 2009: You can't have both. It's a choice you will have to make. Either you leave your BF and take some time and do the "singles" thing or you work through your resentment and stay.
Personally I don't see you making it with your current boy friend i... (read in full...)
Help me to be thin!
Q. hello. i have a problem. please help as best you can. well i am 14, 5'4'' and weigh 9 st 9 lbs. i am really fat. i want to weigh 8 st 7 lbs so i am going to do a pro-ana diet and lots of exercise etc. now someone told me that ana can make you pu...
A. 15 May 2009: I don't even know what Por-ana is but I strongly suggest that before you start any crazy diet fad that you have your mum take you to the doctor first. He can tell you the RIGHT way to loose any weight - if you even need it.
... (read in full...)
He always accuses me of being unfaithful
Q. ive ben with this guy for almost two years now and whenever we havearguments he threatens to leave and when i tell him to go ahead he turns everything around on me saying im the one looking for ways to leave him.then recently we had a fight ...
A. 15 May 2009: I'm 100% with Gina on this one. The man is unstable and controling. YOU need to get out of this relationship or I fear it will escalate into serious violence.
Pepperspray a girlfriend? SICK.
Like Gina said, WHAT are you getting out of t... (read in full...)
Husband's rubbish in bed... I've talked to him, how can I make him change?
Q. Ok so how do I put this. How do I get my husband to help me get turned on during sex? Usually when we have sex he just does what he needs to and we are done 10 mins at the most. I have talked to him about it but it still has not changed anything. ...
A. 14 May 2009: Don't TELL him what you want SHOW him. When you tell a guy they aren't doing it right they feel a sense of failure, which only leads to them either giving up or loosing interest.
SHOW him what you like. TAKE the lead. Don't have sex till you are ... (read in full...)
Just realised that my ex is an arse. How do I move on?
Q. Im starting to resent my ex for letting me go. He was married when I met him and was suppose to be getting a divorce. I didn't feel right seeing him why he was married so I told him lets slow things down until he takes care of the situation. I ...
A. 14 May 2009: Thank you lucky star that he is "done" with you. Now you have ALL the time in the world to focus on YOU.
Take some time and exam your life and your choices in men. Really. One is married and one was ( to quote you) no good.
Don't get inv... (read in full...)
Why did he talk about "us" if he had no intention of their being "us"?
Q. hi i hope someone can help. nearly 2 years ago i met a guy on the net and we developed what i thought was a close friendship and relationship even though we are long distance. we have met up a few times and been intimate etc. just over a week ago he ...
A. 14 May 2009: He might have liked the idea of an "US", but when it came down to it he didn't really want it. To be honest I can't see why he would delete or even forget your phone number unless he's moved on.
I would stop focussing on WHAT you think he is think... (read in full...)
Only married 5 months but there are all these girls!
Q. hello everyone, my husband and i got married this year jan 2009...so we have been married for almost 5 months now...and things are starting to go bad...he is in the military and i know now that military life is hard but thats not our problem....t...
A. 14 May 2009: I understand why you don't want to divorce, because for you divorce = failure. But really, do you think the way your marriage is working right now is any good for you?
I would sit him down and tell him that you want him to talk to the chaplain... (read in full...)
I think he's cheating again..what now?
Q. Hi everyone Well I will try and keep things short. I have been with my husband for 9 years married for 7. About 4 years ago he had an affair with a woman he worked with. It went on for about 2 years and we were apart. We got back together after al...
A. 14 May 2009: You need to listen to your gut. It's SCREAMING at you.
As I see it you have two choices really.
1. stay and be a doormat. He will have his wife (you) and whichever girl is the flavor of his fancy. He will do HIS thing and have no respect for y... (read in full...)
I'm really confused as to who he had an affair with..it just really surprises me!
Q. Dear cupid, I have asked for advice before but need your help once again. My husband was caught cheating and he confessed he had cheated 3 times altogether(married for 21 years),he said how wrong he had been and it will never happen again,we ...
A. 14 May 2009: I totally agree with the first anonymous writer. It's NOT about the women, it's about your husband LACK of control. Seems like he would screw anything that moved. (sorry it that sounds crude but really... am I wrong?)
I can imagine that after 21... (read in full...)
Married, haven't cheated but close to it
Q. i have been married for 14 years now, and have not truly been unfaithful. our sex life has now dried up for the last couple of years. i have met another girl a lot younger than me, also with a boy friend. the two of us share each others secrets and ...
A. 14 May 2009: OK, you have checked out of the marriage emotionally. As far as I think it is important that husband and wife are the best of friends - they really aren't, they are SO much more.
Talk to your wife, get to the bottom of WHY some part of the marri... (read in full...)
Ex-fiance coming by to pick up things, should I be there?
Q. My fiancee just broke up with me last week and ive done NOTHING wrong but she wont see that. The thing that ended it between us is because she found 2 letters in my Outbox to a girl a day before we began even talking to one another and she got ...
A. 13 May 2009: Honestly, I can see why she is hurting.. You tried to get with another girl a DAY before you two got together? And not only that, you KEPT the e-mails.
I think you should call or text her and ask if she would prefer for you to be there or not i... (read in full...)
I think I'm turning lesbian!
Q. Hi I'm kikki and I'm 15 I think I might be turning lesbian but not sure. I have a bf but I don't enjoy sex with him anymore it's like he just cares about himself. Recently during p.e at school I have noticed my nipples going hard getting changed in ...
A. 13 May 2009: I think you are 15 years old. With a TONS of hormones flying around in your body.
You might not be straight. You might not be gay. Not everyone knows right of the bat what sexual orientation they have. But at 15 it's pretty NORMAL to be a little... (read in full...)
How do I tell a guy I want to get sexual?
Q. I have been on 2 seperate dates with this guy I like. Ive known him for awhile but just recently let him know I liked him. Hes made several sexual comments (nothing involving us two-but hes def not the prudish type). I would have sex with him but...
A. 13 May 2009: I agree with Satindesire.
You might fancy him or more bluntly be in LUST with him. Nothing wrong with being attracted to someone physically. But two dates?
Do yourself a favor and TAKE your time to get to know him.... (read in full...)
Best friend cheated with my b/f, don't know if I can forgive her
Q. my best friend slept with my boyfriend at the time they both say it was a mistake but they allways text and have been meeting up behind my back. i ended it with my boyfriend because i couldnt trust him. and i say... once a cheater always a cheater!...
A. 13 May 2009: I'd let them both go. No friend would do this. No real boyfriend either.
... (read in full...)
How do I help my friend clear her name up? They had sex in the school park & everyone is talking about it
Q. Hello cupids, ok so my friend and her boyfriend (now her ex) has had sex in a school park..so while they were having sex this one girl claimed that she seen them.so now the girl who have seen them been going around our whole school telling ppl what ...
A. 13 May 2009: Tell your friend to stop having sex til she can handle the consequences. Having sex at the school park is really a stupid thing to do.
It will eventually blow over ( summer is almost here anyhow)
Be her friend and LEARN from this.
... (read in full...)
He cheated and I'm moving on
Q. Please take the time and read my post. I have seen many replies on dear cupid about cheaters,can i add that my h/b was a cheater he had cheated a few times before he got caught,the reason he says he cheated was he liked the excitement the fear of ...
A. 13 May 2009: High Five!
I know it hurt like hell to have had your heart ripped out, stamped on and then set a fire.
I truly think the saying:
Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me.
Most women are scared of the being alone part ( if they l... (read in full...)
Friend is a teacher and students behavior is very disturbing to her
Q. A friend of mine teaches in a middle school. Two increasing practices worry her. One is that boys are pressing girls to give them blow-jobs. Good girls who resist are made fun off, by both the boys and the girls. The other practice is that gir...
A. 13 May 2009: I think she needs to take it up with the principal and have ALL the parents of the school come to a debate about what is appropriate and what is not.
Makes me want to home school..
It does sound like a sick fantasy, but there are certainly ti... (read in full...)
What can my married lover do for me?
Q. Dear cupid i am in love with a married man not because I wanted that but we were met each other with his reason, he is married and have 3 children but not happy in his marriage they were divorced many times but children was the reason to be together ...
A. 12 May 2009: Oh he's got you fooled good.. He's married. He has no intentions of leaving her for you, so if you choose to have a relationship with him, all you get is the leftovers.. Sorta the crumbs of the wife's table.. Are you satisfied with that?
He ge... (read in full...)
Am I a stalker as she says I am?
Q. Would anyone here consider it like stalking if the person your with says they're somewhere and you drive by to really see if there are where they say? Especially if they've lied before? it blew up today with the girl i was seeing she said she was at ...
A. 12 May 2009: Yeah, I would call that stalking or the beginning of having stalking tendencies.
WHY would you be with a girl whom you don't trust? Trust is the cornerstone of ANY relationships, be it partnership, friendship, marriage... so forth..
What di... (read in full...)
Update: He is overly protective of his email and workplace
Q. Hi I was on here before about my boyfriend being over protective of his email and Blackberry. He viciously protects his office and the vicinity and wants me nowhere close. This is an update. He found that question here on DC, plus your a...
A. 12 May 2009: Amen, Emily's Answers.. She said what I thought...
- this isn't love.
... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken, confused and don't know what to think or do
Q. My boyfriend who is in the middle of his divorce decided to go away for one week to Europe after finding out I had gone on a date several months after we started dating. At that time, December 08/January 09, he had been acting standoffish, distant ...
A. 12 May 2009: I'm sorry you are still hurting. I did understand that he told you he was seperated when you two met. Seperated and divored is not the same. Seperated means STILL married with a LOT of issues going on. So not only is the man highly unlikely to ... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken, confused and don't know what to think or do
Q. My boyfriend who is in the middle of his divorce decided to go away for one week to Europe after finding out I had gone on a date several months after we started dating. At that time, December 08/January 09, he had been acting standoffish, distant ...
A. 11 May 2009: I really can't see why he would be ticked off that you went on a date.. THE man is married.
But really, this is the kinda mess you can get into when being with married men. They lie and cheat on their wives you really think it's so far fetched ... (read in full...)
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