We started exploring kinks and now I'm feeling that things are out of hand
Q. So me and my girlfriend are fairly kinky and I know she likes BDSM (since a friend took her to an event last year) so I asked her if she'd like to go to a rope workshop in a couple of weeks.. This tipped over a few more dominoes than expected, s...
A. 2 March 2011: I'm sorry. Guess it wasn't meant to be.
... (read in full...)
If a guy won't wait does it automatically mean he wants to use you?
Q. ok,so there is this guy-ive known him about 3 months but we didnt see each other for a few weeks and now weve started seeing each other again I tried telling him I want to wait a few weeks for things to get back to normal before we have sex but he ...
A. 1 March 2011: I think he is very disrespectful towards you. Does it make him a user? Not necessarily, just an inconsiderate horny jerk.
... (read in full...)
Her interferring mother has called off the wedding. What advice can I offer, when asked, and not make this fiasco worse?
Q. I was due to attend a wedding next week of two very dear friends. One (him) a relative of mine and she a great friend. It seemed a marriage made in heaven. They both have great jobs. Though she is a tiny bit more qualified than him. That was of...
A. 1 March 2011: Yikes. Tell the "groom" to consider this... If he had married the girl that woman would be his MOTHER in Law, imagine the drama she would create down the road?
I honestly, agree with the anon male who wrote that he needs to "thank" her.... (read in full...)
He stood me up because he fell asleep! What should I do?
Q. This guy that i've been crushing on recently wanted to catch up with me for coffee. He said he would call me around noon and we'd decide on a place... I got ready and waited and waited...he didn't pick up my call and i got a message after 4 ...
A. 1 March 2011: Sounds like a booty call kind of guy. I'd let that fish back into the sea and forget all about him.
He doesn't seem worth the time or effort.
And he still didn't apologize he just called himself an ass........ (read in full...)
I feel as if he's just chewed me up and spat me out!!!
Q. Hi guys, just looking for some advice... I've been living with my boyfriend who is from another country about 3 years and everything (I thought) seemed to be going smoothly. We have talked often about having kids in the future. However last night he ...
A. 1 March 2011: I agree with the Anon female, the language thing is a cop out.
I don't think he really wants to either marry your or have children with you. HE DOESN'T SEE you in his future, that right there should tell you all you need to know.
Time to leave... (read in full...)
My husband asked for my sister's phone number!!!
Q. My husband and I have been married for over 13 years now. We have 3 kids together. My sister and I are best friends. She used to be living with us for 3 years and my husband never crossed the line with her. She is single and lives on own now. My ...
A. 1 March 2011: Sounds like a midlife crisis to me.
You two need to have an honest chat about your marriage and sex life. You might not be the only one to have noticed the downward slope in your sex life. Maybe it's time to do something about it. It takes tw... (read in full...)
After we made out he said he feels like we didn't click why would he say this?
Q. hi, so there's this guy who lives where i always go on holiday, about ever month. we have known each other for a about two years. I recently started texting him and we did this like every single day and i got very close to him. we started txtin a ...
A. 1 March 2011: He just isn't into you. I give him credits for telling you instead of hooking up with you and then ignoring you.
... (read in full...)
Is it ok to take the plan b twice within 2 days?
Q. Ok my boyfriend and I had sex for the firts time with out any protection, no condom and I am not in any birth control pill, I was my firts time and he didn't come inside me, I was so freak out because I defenately didn't want to end pregnant so I ...
A. 1 March 2011: Ask your doctor.
Start using condoms or stop having sex.... (read in full...)
I don't know who got me pregnant!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been together and have been trying for a baby for months.I was last on my period on the 26th January which usually lasts about 5/6 days. We had sex a few times from the first week of february and broke up. I met up with my e...
A. 1 March 2011: I don't have an Magic 8-ball, so the only way to know for sure is through a DNA test. ... (read in full...)
He married me for citizenship!
Q. The man I married is not who I thought he was since he is now in the states. We have had our ups and downs and I felt just trying to get use to each other since being apart for so long, but after 9 months of being in the states when he and I have a ...
A. 1 March 2011: Oh I'd dump him and divorce him in a heartbeat..... (read in full...)
What is the etiquette for a married woman's behavior in party situations where her husband isn't present?
Q. What is the etiquette for a married woman's behavior in party situations where her husband isn't present? My wife just returned from a trip with some girlfriends to Atlantic City. While there she won a bunch of money playing a game that she di...
A. 1 March 2011: A female reader, chigirl + ?, writes (1 March 2011):
"Should I be giving her free reign to chat, accept drinks, joke around, not freak out if someone is flirting with her - so long as she doesn't actually do anything with anyone?"
Ye... (read in full...)
I am feeling pressured, but I have the right to choose who to keep in my life, right?
Q. I've come to the time now where I can't be bothered with some people. I just think some people haven't grown up. People lie, spread rumors, insult you, judge you ect.... I've dumped some people out of my life because of what they are like. I know ...
A. 26 February 2011: Yes, thinking about and for yourself is vital, no matter your age. And not wanting to waste time on ignorant, immature people is a good choice.... (read in full...)
We shared a bed, and we touched, but didn't go further. Should I tell his Gf?
Q. i'm 15 and have been single for about a year. Last week i went to a party at a mates house and because i had no way of getting home i stayed at his house and it was me and 5 other boys but we are all really good friends so it didn't bother me. I ...
A. 26 February 2011: I actually agree with Caring Guy on this. I wouldn't tell. Nothing really happened and no matter what... you will look bad too, not just him.
Next time, tell him to find another couch to sleep on and keep his hands to himself. ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to take Viagra?
Q. My boyfriend has started using Viagra to have sex with me, in the beginning we used to have sex all the time and there was no problem and now he feels the need to take it every time. Is this because he's not attracted to me anymore?...
A. 26 February 2011: I think he needs to see his doctor more then take Viagra if he is in his 20's.
I don't think that is normal at all. Men in their 20's are like rabbits.. (no offense to any of them ;) )... (read in full...)
Can a married man and a married woman be just friends?
Q. Can anyone tell me why a guy would start to distance himself from a woman? We were friends for about a year but there has been some chemistry between us. Suddenly he is not talking to me anymore and avoiding me at all the places we would see each ...
A. 26 February 2011: I think he cut the tie because he felt like it would get out of control if he didn't.
I DO think married men can be friends with married women (other then their spouse). What it comes down to is respect and a bucket full of morals.... (read in full...)
I'm a homosexual acting like I'm heterosexual to be accepted
Q. I am a homosexual male but I am acting as a heterosexual to remain accepted in my society. People around me seem very judgemental and so I am afraid of being judged for my sexual orientation. I have a girlfriend which makes it worse as I don't...
A. 26 February 2011: First off, I think you are being unfair to your GF. You are basically "pretending" with her, it's not a "real" relationship for you as it is for her. Not fair. You say you don't know anyone trustworthy enough? Doesn't that tell you something about ... (read in full...)
Husband texting his ex personal info on facebook, should I be worried?
Q. My husband and I will be married 15 years tomorrow. We have three beautiful children together and are expecting our fourth this summer. Today, he received a friend request from a girl he used to date in high school on Facebook. He once told me that ...
A. 26 February 2011: Auntie Abella, has some good ideas :)
I think the fact that he hasn't mentioned that she lives near his work is odd, or that he is thinking of taking her out for lunch. Seems to me that he is hiding it, which isn't good.
... (read in full...)
I can't stand my family and friends derogatory remarks regarding my girlfriend's weight...
Q. I've begun seeing a girl I care deeply for. We get along great and are friends as well. The only problem is I can't stand my family and friends dirogitory remarks reguarding her weight. I'll admit in the past I really wouldn't date a bigger g...
A. 25 February 2011: Just tell them straight out how it makes you feel. ... (read in full...)
I dated a heartbreaker and now he wants nothing to do with me!
Q. I just recently became involved with a guy and I thought I really liked him. He was known as a player but always told me I was different. Three weeks into our "thing" we had a date alone at his place. We did all sorts of stuff but when I said I'd ...
A. 25 February 2011: How do you get over it? By realizing that he was a douche. You slept with a douche. It happens, don't be mad at yourself, but understand that people don't change. It's not that you weren't special enough for him, he is just a player who cares about ... (read in full...)
A not so jolly holiday. I don't think he is right. Any opinions?
Q. My boyfriend of 1 year has 2 children from his previous marriage. I invited them to to our family Christmas dinner. He came along with his children, but didn't accept the invitation for certain until a few days before Christmas. He was very ups...
A. 22 February 2011: Wow, those kids of his must be super spoiled. I think your BF is an asshat.
First of all HE should have provided you with suggestions to gifts, but ASKED you first what you thought about giving them presents.
He EXPECTED everyone else to... (read in full...)
I want children, he already has 2. Do I believe him when he says we could have more?
Q. My boyfriend has 2 kids from his previous marriage, I don't have children but would like to. He doesn't want any more children, but he says he will consider it if we get married. Do I take him at his word and hope he changes his mind if we marry ...
A. 22 February 2011: Be up front with him, don't just wait til you are married. Either he wants kids with you (at some point) or he doesn't.
This should be an issue you both agree on.
... (read in full...)
Boyfriend broke up with me because he said I pointed out his flaws
Q. So the other day I went to see my boyfriend and he had some weird bumps on his lips and I pointed it out and ask him if it was a cold sore because it could be herpes and you should go check it out. So at first he was playful with it and after I ...
A. 22 February 2011: Move on. If you can't ask your BF what's up on his lip who can you ask?
Though, I wouldn't try and "diagnose" future BF's with STD's....... (read in full...)
Do I let go of my b/f of seven years who cheats?
Q. hi, well am 25 and in a little dilemma...am sorry my email is going to be a little long so as for the one who answers it knows exactly what is happening.. i have been on and off with this guy for 7 years now. we were good until i had to go off to ...
A. 18 February 2011: Honestly, why are you willing to settle with a man who is cheating on you? Do you think if you get married he will stop?
It's not about letting him go, he already left honey.
It's about you moving on, up and onward, girlie. You can do a lot bet... (read in full...)
Amazing relationship until we learned his previous g/f was pregnant
Q. I am looking to get advice strictly from those in a similar position. I have sought advice from friends, but as they can't relate, I feel like I am not getting sound advice. I am in a relationship of 6 months. We met online, and if not for this pro...
A. 18 February 2011: Walk away. You have been "seeing" him for 6 months, WHILE he had a GF? or how/when did she get knocked up?
Too much drama already if you ask me. Trust me on this one.... (read in full...)
Do I respond? Or is silence golden, in the circumstances?
Q. How should i respond to a text from my ex who has come into town. i had texted him, telling him, "we shouldn't see each other, when he's in town". he replied with "ok bye." then two hours later he texted me with a booty call text basicall...
A. 18 February 2011: If you don't want to hook up, either tell him no go fly a kite or ignore the text.Not that hard.... (read in full...)
Why do you think I am behaving like this in class?
Q. Im in yr 10 im not very shy, im the least shy out of my friends. But i took geography as one of my options, dont get me wrong i 3 it. But it seems that when ever i go into the class i go into a shell, i never speak unless i have to, i never pu...
A. 18 February 2011: Well make take English all over...
If you feel like you can't do your best, because you have a crush, transfer out.
... (read in full...)
I really love her. Do you think she could learn to want me to be the one?
Q. Hey guys, so I love my ex girl friend. I would do anything for her. We broke up because she was confused about whether she loved me or not. We broke up twice with the same issue. She was confused, not knowing whether to pick me, or her best...
A. 18 February 2011: You can't make her love you. You can't make a cow fly either.
I honestly don't think she knows what she truly wants. So I suggest you move on. Find someone who wants you and badly and you want them.... (read in full...)
My LDR boyfriend randomly deleted me from facebook!
Q. Okay, this is weird and very confusing. Im in a LDR with a guy I met new years eve and who works away - 300 miles north - but we keep in touch on facebook. I really, really like him and the time weve spent together has been amazing. Las...
A. 12 February 2011: Honestly if you really like this guy (as you claim) why not pick up the phone and call him? I think you have EVERY right to know why he did that.
I have to say though, that it sounds ultra iffy that he worries about YOU cheating, then delete y... (read in full...)
Why won't this man commit? And did I make the right decision?
Q. My boyfriend of two and half years broke up with me the first week of December, and shortly after I started talking to new guy. For the first month, we just communicated via texts, but we really got to know each other and we were both starting to ...
A. 11 February 2011: I have to say I agree with Cerberus. However he looks at fro ma male perspective (of course) and we women don't always think like that.
I do think he is your rebound guy. Nothing wrong with rebounds, they are bound to happen sooner or later.
... (read in full...)
Wife making my fantasy come true - how best to support/encourage her?
Q. Ok, we're both in our late 30s here and have been married for several years, together for much longer than that. As a Valentine's present to me, she's agreed to let me indulge a long cherished fantasy; two watch two women together. She's ...
A. 11 February 2011: Why not just go "easy" on your wife and see how she handles the "voyeur" session first? If it is something that makes her curious, maybe you can suggest that she is welcome to join them.
Baby steps, would be my advice.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend through me into the snow during an argument! I'm not sure what to think!
Q. I was walking outside with my boyfriend of 6 months, when we got into a small disagreement. We were holding hands, when he suddenly flung me across his body and into the snow on the side of the road. I landed, unhurt, but shaken. He is much stronger ...
A. 11 February 2011: No one can give you a probability of whether it will happen again or not, I think it's more LIKELY that something (violent/abusive) will happen again, then nothing will ever happen again.
Just remember this, YOU CAN NOT CHANGE HIM. No matter h... (read in full...)
We started exploring kinks and now I'm feeling that things are out of hand
Q. So me and my girlfriend are fairly kinky and I know she likes BDSM (since a friend took her to an event last year) so I asked her if she'd like to go to a rope workshop in a couple of weeks.. This tipped over a few more dominoes than expected, s...
A. 10 February 2011: You two need to set some rules and boundaries that you BOTH agree to PRIOR to even doing anything else.
YOU need to come clean and be honest about how you feel.... (read in full...)
Has anyone else felt unhappy about being pregnant? Will these feelings go away?
Q. Last week I found out I am pregnant with my boyfriend of 3 and a half year's baby. He is delighted at the news and cannot wait to become a father. I am struggling to be excited or even feel happy about being pregnant, is this normal? I have never ...
A. 10 February 2011: It will most likely change. Don't forget you have about 8-9 months to get used to the idea.
It's scary and exciting at the same time. It's a huge responsibility, a lot of work, a lot of tears, a lot of joy and love. IT IS OK not not be sure how... (read in full...)
I'm widowed and slept with a married man. For once in my life I want to be selfish and just do what I want!
Q. I have been widowed for a year and have 2 children. This doesn't leave me a lot of time to date or even meet someone. I do miss having sex but I am not ready for a relationship and may never be, given the circumstances of my previous marriage and ...
A. 10 February 2011: So because YOU lost YOUR husband it's ok for you to do this to another woman? Because you are hurting some other woman should hurt with you?
I don't understand your reasoning at all.
Finding a FWB (friends with benefits) single guy can't be ... (read in full...)
My colleague is a bit of a nightmare
Q. My colleague is a bit of a nightmare and I don't know how to handle her! Some background - 3 years ago, I asked for a divorce after many years of physical and emotional violence from my partner. I have an eating disorder, which flared up under ...
A. 10 February 2011: First off, no I think distance is what YOU need to do. In order to function and work.
Secondly, I don't think you should take responsibility for her problems, after all you didn't "make" her do it. She made a choice and stuck by it. You tried to... (read in full...)
She told me to leave her alone - what do I do?
Q. I gave my crush a note to tell her how I felt about her, she's a shy female, one week later, I asked her what she thought of it and she told me to leave her alone, what does that mean?? ...
A. 10 February 2011: It's pretty simple, you leave her alone. She is not for you. ... (read in full...)
Stingy boyfriend! Am I asking for too much?
Q. Have been with my bf for 7mths.i like buying him gifts,but he never gets me anything.he says girls are not suposed to be spoiled with gifts and money.he complains about being broke all the time,but i know he gets 2 have money most of the time.we are ...
A. 10 February 2011: Seems to me you should follow his example and stop buying him stuff. If he truly can't afford to spoil you how is he supposed to do so?
Get him a card. It's just Valentine's.... (read in full...)
My friends dislike my boyfriend and want me to dump him. What should I do?
Q. hi :) I'm 15 and i have been going out with my boyfriend for 3 months. He is quite rude to most people and he is always really rude to some of my closest friends. He is always getting into arguments and insulting them, especially 'Amy'. Amy is qu...
A. 10 February 2011: Maybe you need to talk to him? Tell him that it hurts YOUR feelings when he isn't even trying to be friendly to your friends?
It's about respect. He needs to respect your friends and they in turn needs to respect you, your choice and him.... (read in full...)
My friends dislike my boyfriend and want me to dump him. What should I do?
Q. hi :) I'm 15 and i have been going out with my boyfriend for 3 months. He is quite rude to most people and he is always really rude to some of my closest friends. He is always getting into arguments and insulting them, especially 'Amy'. Amy is qu...
A. 10 February 2011: Boyfriends come and go.. REAL friends are forever.
He doesn't sound like a keeper, if you ask me.... (read in full...)
He doesn't want to give up his party ways for me!
Q. I'm going to make my best effort to make a long story short... My boyfiend (21) and I (20) had been together for three years. Everything seemed to be going well..however, once he turned 21 he started wanting to go out and party with his friends. In ...
A. 10 February 2011: Why are you scared to lose this guy? He sounds like a total dick-wad douche-bag.
Don't you honestly think you can do better then him? Deserve better then him?
Sure you can move on. It just takes a little time, effort and self respect.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is way too controlling and refuses to let go of me!
Q. My bf and I have been together like 9yrs now. In the beginning as always perfect..now its not bad but hes gotten way to jealous. He dosent want me hanging with my girls who he met me with. He dislikes my family all of a sudden, he even hates that I ...
A. 10 February 2011: Leave him and get a restraining order.... (read in full...)
I want my family's blessing for my wedding
Q. I'm 17 and getting married to my older brothers friend who is 31 and also were trying to have a baby. he has two kids from a former marriage. we love each other so much more than anything in the world. but im afraid that my family or his wont ...
A. 10 February 2011: Wait til about a year after you guys get married to try for a baby. Live as husband and wife first. Trust me on that. There will be PLENTY of time for adding a child.
Also, if anyone stands up it would be to object not reject.
WHY has he (y... (read in full...)
My boyfriend through me into the snow during an argument! I'm not sure what to think!
Q. I was walking outside with my boyfriend of 6 months, when we got into a small disagreement. We were holding hands, when he suddenly flung me across his body and into the snow on the side of the road. I landed, unhurt, but shaken. He is much stronger ...
A. 8 February 2011: I'd run. The relationship would be over instantly. Sorry I would not tolerate any kind of abuse ot violence.
What's next? a broken nose? Heck no!
... (read in full...)
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