Ladies: How important are a man's looks in a relationship?
Q. Hello. This is not a "problem" as such, but i have a question for the ladies.... TRUTHFULLY, how important are a mans looks in a relationship? I ask this for 2 reasons. Firstly women always say that its personality, kindness, empathy, sense o...
A. 25 October 2011: Thing is, men and women.... judge anyone they meet in the first maybe 15 seconds? and what do we all judge on, given the short time? Looks. Looks are just not enough to keep a most women interested long term.
Some say that VERY masculine men like... (read in full...)
He's like a jack in the box..popping in and out of my life, constantly. How do I deal with this guy?
Q. I met "busy bee" a year ago, we hit it off right away and the chemistry was just wow. at first he seemed excited i was excited he was my first of everything, my first real explosive kiss, we connected!! we would link up here and there, I thought he ...
A. 25 October 2011: Have you told him to stop playing you like a yo-yo?... (read in full...)
Am I reading too much into this guy's behavior's?
Q. I started getting weird vibes from a man at work. He is married with two kids. We work together and keep it professional. I noticed that when people are not looking, he will wink at me with a smile. He did this twice. If I need something that ...
A. 24 October 2011: I think it can be one of three things, 1. he is trying to make you feel at ease or 2. he is hitting on you, 3. he is a flirt.
I'm honestly guessing #3.
If you ignore the signals he keeps sending out, hopefully he will realize that you are not... (read in full...)
He's like a jack in the box..popping in and out of my life, constantly. How do I deal with this guy?
Q. I met "busy bee" a year ago, we hit it off right away and the chemistry was just wow. at first he seemed excited i was excited he was my first of everything, my first real explosive kiss, we connected!! we would link up here and there, I thought he ...
A. 24 October 2011: You either accept that THIS is how it is or you tell him you back off, block his number and move on.
He is not going to change any time soon, this seems to work well for him.... (read in full...)
It's the small things he doesn't do which make me feel unappreciated
Q. Hello. Just wondered If I am being unreasonable, as my partner said, sometimes it's good to get an outsiders perspective! Live with my partner of 4 years. I work near enough full time and study full time. He works full time. I do pretty much all ...
A. 24 October 2011: I think you need to realize that he is not a mind reader. You assumed he would cook YOU something, because YOU always take care of him.
Maybe the reason he didn't cook for you is that is isn't sure how to avoid the things you can not eat?
... (read in full...)
Guys do you do this? Girls do you endure this?
Q. My boyfriend says he loves me and isn't looking for anyone else. I commented today about how lame skankygirl pirate costumes are. He said he hopes they're around for a long time. I'm insecure by nature and the thought of him looking at other...
A. 24 October 2011: I find most Halloween outfits for women/teens rather skanky and they are getting skankier by the year.
I think you aked him a totally different question then what he answered too. As in you aked him to agree with you, he thought you wanted h... (read in full...)
My fiance keeps asking me to play along with her fantasy but then rejects my advances! What do I do??
Q. so i know rape fantasy is very common among women. my fiance has always enjoyed this fantasy and has often asked me to "fuck her like im raping her". she will always tell me to be rougher or go harder. now she is quite ashamed about these fantasies ...
A. 23 October 2011: Not normal at all.
I would seriously talk to her about it.... (read in full...)
Ladies: How important are a man's looks in a relationship?
Q. Hello. This is not a "problem" as such, but i have a question for the ladies.... TRUTHFULLY, how important are a mans looks in a relationship? I ask this for 2 reasons. Firstly women always say that its personality, kindness, empathy, sense o...
A. 23 October 2011: Usually that is the first thing you notice about someone, their looks. I have met many people in my life who weren't exactly lookers but they exuded such selfconfidence and humor you don't notice their looks. Some people just grow on you. ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend being uncaring and is it okay for him to be hiding photos with girls from me?
Q. Hi, i have been going out with my boyfriend for almost 6 months now and everything was going so well until recently. The other night he went clubbing with his best friend and put photos of it on facebook which he showed me and that was all cool, ...
A. 21 October 2011: Your BF seems a bit immature and selfish. You on the other hand seem to overreact a little. Going out and taking pictures of people you are patying with is really no big deal, in my book( the HIDING the pictures are though and lying about it is a ... (read in full...)
How sexy should I encourage my wife to dress for Halloween?
Q. OK, so we are going to a Halloween party. Same party we went to last year. Last year there were a few (like 3) fairly sexy costumes. Needless to say, these women got a lot of attention, and I am sure were the topic of conversation among many couples ...
A. 21 October 2011: I couldn't have said it better then Tisha!
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A female reader, Tisha-1 + ?, writes (21 October 2011):
This is easy: the fashionista rule of thumb for ladies of a certain age is pick ... (read in full...)
Sex with my younger boyfriend sucks. How much time should I give him to improve?
Q. Hello, My boyfriend and I have known each other for almost a year. He is a very lovely and caring guy. He is also tall, handsome, dark hair, and muscular (ok he's really my type). He just moved from Poland to US when we first met. Since I came fro...
A. 21 October 2011: Does he know that there is room for improvement?
I think rather then telling him he isn't up to par, you SHOW him what you like, want and need.
... (read in full...)
If you are with a divorced man does that automatically mean I have to have a second best wedding and a second best life?
Q. My partner of 3 years is a nice guy, he makes me laugh, he’s good company, he cooks me dinner, we share interests. Intimacy is great. He got divorced 6 years ago. I have never been married. The problem is he has so many problems and we cannot ge...
A. 21 October 2011: My hubs had been divorces for 6 years when we met. And honestly there are days, I wish I hadn't been so naive as far as the bagage scales.. He had SO much of it, I barely had any. An ex-wife and a couple of kids doesn't always mean load of drama ... (read in full...)
Is this even worth it anymore?
Q. Hi everyone and thank you for your help! My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years. Started off nice as all relationships usually do. He was sweet, listened to me, complimentive, and very caring. He still has many of those traits but there...
A. 21 October 2011: I think the only one who can truly answer that is you. And the fact that you are now questioning it all, means your needs aren't met in the relationship.
I know you want him to be the guy you started out with, but he isn't going to change. ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to still have sleepovers at 19?
Q. This isn't a relationship question but is it normal or ok to still have sleepovers at 19? My friend and I always stay in each others place and have a few drinks is it normal that we still have sleepovers?...
A. 21 October 2011: Yes it is perfectly normal! If I lived closer to my besties I'm sure we would be having some kids-free sleep overs too.... (read in full...)
I think I moved too fast in this relationship
Q. I started dating my guy friend of two years a couple weeks ago. On Saturday we were at his house alone and fooled around a bit (i gave him a hand job and he fingered me). It was completely my choice as he was adamant that I only do things I'm ...
A. 21 October 2011: If you think YOU moved to fast, then slow down. Let the guy know that you are interested, but that you need to take things slow. If he is worth a darn he will agree and understand (no matter how horny you both are).
It is hard with all the horm... (read in full...)
What should I do about this guy my girlfriend is hanging out with?
Q. So my gf meet this guy on a dating sight just like she meet me. But this guy is 30 and says age is just a number. He buys her whatever she wants and she hangs out with him i know she hates this guy. SO DO I. But he keeps touchin her and picks her ...
A. 21 October 2011: I wouldn't do ANYTHING about the dude.. but I would dump the GF.
She is obviously using the other guy as some kind of SugarDaddy.. Sooner or later he will want "payment" for all his "good deeds"... Sorry your GF is a user with nasty skanky b... (read in full...)
He won't let me see his facebook page because I snooped when we were broken up!
Q. I snooped in my boyfriends facebook account months ago when we were broken up.we're back together now but he wont add me back on his friend list.he said i dont deserve it because of when i snooped.he said he will put that he is in a relationship as ...
A. 21 October 2011: It's just Facebook.
Seriously!
He is however punishing you for your snooping. So either take it and accept it or let him go. Or there will be this never ending circle of punishing from either side.
IF you stay together.... You two obv... (read in full...)
Can women really be addicted to a man for the sex?
Q. Okay ladies, this is pretty sexual. What do you think of a man that is a, for lack of a better word, GOD in bed. Can women really be addicted to a man that can basically just give her absolute pleasure anytime, anywhere, all the time? Would cheating ...
A. 21 October 2011: Good sex, good relationship, good chemestry and cheating can be totally unlrelated. The reason people cheat is often (from what I have seen) a self desctructive behavior. Or purely selfish behavior.
Anyone can be addicted to good sex. But if all y... (read in full...)
Leaking bladder problems
Q. Ever since i was little, i always had a bladder problem. Where I accidently leak in my underwear and no matter what I do, it always happens...i can hold my bladder and tell when to go, but i "tinkle" and it is quite embrassing, especially when I'm ...
A. 21 October 2011: Like the other "Aunties" said, talk to your doctor. None else can help you fix this. IT is not an uncommon problem.... (read in full...)
I found my old crush on facebook and now I feel like I am in love with her again
Q. This may sound weird because I am talking about someone I have never dated. There is this girl I was in love with as a child. We were just class friends but in my heart she was more than that. We studied in the same class for 3 years which was enou...
A. 20 October 2011: First of I think you are confusing a crush with love. You HAD a crush on her and now.. you are living in fantasy land..
If she DOES reply take it slow, see where it goes.
I know how old pictures can trigger lovely memories of the good times i... (read in full...)
My fiance slapped me. Should I dump him?
Q. im engaged and my weve been together for 3 Years. Yesterday we got in a argument and i told him something that pissed him off and he slapped me in the face twice. He has a bad temper but that was overboard.at the moment i told him that i was done ...
A. 20 October 2011: I would NOT take him back in a million years.
Is he on steroids perhaps?
And domestic abuse starts with something as "simple" as an argument, a slap. But you have to look ahead, what might he do next? punch you? choke you?
... (read in full...)
He said I could console him with sex!
Q. Hi. This guy I kind of know (we had a little 'thing' a while ago) is going through a really tough time at the moment as his mum has just passed away. I feel so sad for him and I asked if there was anything I could do, and he wants me to stay the ...
A. 20 October 2011: Well, to explain it in a simple way, what he wants is to forget about his grief and he thinks sex will do that.. At least for a few minutes.
But, here is the thing. He will have to deal with it, face it.
It is like pissing your pants in wi... (read in full...)
Army wives and girlfriends - do they ALL cheat when soldiers are deployed?
Q. I am in th army and I leave for deployment in less then 3 weeks. My current girlfriend and I have been dating for almost 10 months, we have a great relationship. This will the first time either one of us will eb dating someone who is deployed. a few ...
A. 20 October 2011: Ofcourse they don't ALL cheat.
I've been an Army wife for almost 14 years, my husband has been deployed 3 times and been away for schools/reclass and so forth many times too, and I have never cheated. Never even crossed my mind.
That is how I... (read in full...)
Could the average guy handle this? Eight months on and my Gf is trying to treat me like her servant
Q. 8 months back , I dumped my girlfriend with whom I had spent 3 years . I had no reason to dump her except I was feeling bored in that relationship . She tried for next one month to bring me back into her life but I didn’t move an inch and then she ...
A. 20 October 2011: To be honest, she is punishing you for dumping her in the first place. So where is the love?
Why are you still there if she treats you like crap?... (read in full...)
B/f isn't an Australian citizen, has run out of money, no studies, no job, is addicted to poker...and he wants to marry me!!
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for 7 months but I've got a few problem... 1.His not an australian citizen. 2.He came here to study and almost finished his diploma until he ran out of money because he spent it on going out everyweekend. 3.no st...
A. 20 October 2011: No matter what, DO NOT marry him.
If he really loves you and want to be with you, he will get his shit in order first.
... (read in full...)
Is my penis normal?
Q. i need to know if my penis is normal its is a little bit dark and has a weird patch does that matter?...
A. 20 October 2011: If it's something "new" the see a doctor. Though I'm pretty sure it's perfectly normal. Penis aren't exactly "pretty" to being with so don't fret. :)... (read in full...)
I have my suspicions...is this woman he claims to be his 'sister' really his wife?
Q. I have a guy for almost one year who lives with a woman in a single room whom he claims that the lady is his sister. There is a long distance between where he stays. He has been to my place twice and I've been to his place twice. My first time i ...
A. 20 October 2011: Seems like it really doesn't matter who she is, the guy is a loser.... (read in full...)
Does it mean he cares if he refuses to make her the other woman?
Q. Is this a fair statement? If a married man has a female friend he is attracted to and she is attracted to him, does it mean he cares about her if he refuses to make her the other woman? Any opinions?...
A. 19 October 2011: I think it says a LOT more about his integrity, morals and values then how he feels about his female "friend".
However, if he CARES about his wife and marriage he will realize that being "friends" with a women he has the hots for (whether he acts ... (read in full...)
I think my boyfriend's best friend is gay...
Q. One of my boyfriend's best friends is an Australian guy who recently had to move back to Australia after living as roommates with my boyfriend for around a year here in the United States. They've gone on road trips together, shared a room, changed ...
A. 19 October 2011: Does it really matter if he is gay or it is just a "bromance"?
If your BF isn't gay, the guy knows it. He isn't going to turn your BF gay or jump his bones. Your Bf either either aware and not worried or he is oblivious to it all.
I jsut don't ... (read in full...)
I'd like to let him know how I feel
Q. I went on a "date" with a man tonight. We went out for dinner, and played pool, spent a good 4 hours together, talking and laughing the whole time. He has made me dinner twice in the past month, and we have casually gone to the driving range once ...
A. 19 October 2011: Honestly, take your time getting to know him. Enjoy that this guy can take it slow.
You have had.. 4 dates? all in all? 1 Date-date, 2 dinners and 1 trip to the driving range?
A guy doesn't cook for a girl he isn't interested in, unless he's ... (read in full...)
My boyfriends sister hates me that much that she wished I would die giving birth!
Q. My boyfriends sister hates me, more so that i have recently fallen pregnant that she said she hopes i bleed to death and die giving birth! Also trying to break us up, I seriously don't know how to cope with her. It all started when i was best fri...
A. 19 October 2011: Ignore the toxic bitches. The more attention you pay them, the more drama they will create, the more YOU help stir the pot.
Hopefully your BF knows they are like that towards you and he will ignore it too.... (read in full...)
Had my first kiss with a guy I like then I find out his ex is having his baby....what should I do?
Q. This guy in my college class has been flirting with me for the past few weeks. He's 26, I'm 20. His flirting hasn't been inappropriate just some "You look beautiful" kind of flirting. Yesterday I decided to go for it and we went to his house to ...
A. 19 October 2011: Honestly, I give him credits for talling you THAT soon, if he had been an asshat, he would have told you AFTER he got you in bed..
So points for that.
As far as the situation, I would step back. I would NOT pursue this relationship, fo... (read in full...)
Why do people give up so easily? Why don't dumper's communicate until it's too late?
Q. My ex dumped me out of the blue. He said that I have no self confidence [not true] and I'm not assertive enough- that I'm a push over. So why did he wait until it was too late to tell me this? Why didn't he even tell me this sooner? Why didn't he ...
A. 19 October 2011: If he dumped you out fo the blue, then it was most likely the only "excuse" he could think of. And him blaming the break up on you... well, maybe he thinks that makes him less of a douche.
Ovbiously he didn't want to be in the relation... (read in full...)
I thought we had come to a compromise but then he totally disregards me and does what he wants anyway! Will life always be like this with him?
Q. I wrote on here about 2 weeks ago with the question below* and got some good advice which generally agreed with what i thought. So i asked my husband if he would go away for 3 weeks instead of 5 and in the end we compromised on 4. Problem now is he ...
A. 19 October 2011: It must be nice to be able to just "take off" from life for 6 weeks. I can't say I blame him for wanting too. However, I think it's rather selfish in a marriage to do so. Specially if you two have planned on saving up for a house/home. However, he ... (read in full...)
Left my fiancé today because I found out about 7 dating websites on his computer....
Q. Dear Cupid, I would truly appreciate a reply to my question. I am 28 years old and my fiancé is 26 years old. I even spoke with my mother this morning regarding this issue. Last Sunday I went to my fiancé's house as we normally spend our w...
A. 19 October 2011: Honestly, it wouldn't be the first time I heard the "oh my brother/my friend looked at those sites, not me -excuse". But personally I would check the times/dates and see if there was a possiblity that he is telling the truth, IF and only if he's ... (read in full...)
I am very upset that someone else is treating my son in this way - what should I do?
Q. Dear Cupid My son is 8 and lives with my ex-husband and his wife every second weekend. Last weekend, the wife had an argument with my son and my son lay face down on the couch. The wife told him to stay there until he had calmed down. He went t...
A. 19 October 2011: Talk to your-ex husband first. Get the other side of the story.
Also, you need to have a sit down with your ex-husband AND his wife about rules & punishment. All of you need to be on the same page with this.
No one should do that to a child.... (read in full...)
Worried about girlfriends genital irritation
Q. Hello over there... I am very worried of my wife who of late told me that she is having an irritation on her genitals since last month! Most of the time that we have sex she may go dry and saliva comes to aid... My worry is ..is it the contraceptive ...
A. 19 October 2011: Wife or GF? I would suggest she go see a doctor.... (read in full...)
Should I tell him that I know about his activity on the swingers' site?
Q. hi, my bf and myself are in our mid forties, and been together for just over a year. I am very attracted to my bf and i can honestly say that this is the first man i've been with that i really don't want anyone else and never look at another ...
A. 19 October 2011: It's his fantasy, so maybe he is having a "hard" time letting totally go of it for now? I don't think it means that he will actually act on it. But... I would bring it up. I would also bring up that you "want" more sex, though instead of telling ... (read in full...)
I was his rebound girl....how do I get over this?
Q. I was his rebound girl. I cannot believe it. I definitely knew what I got myself into, but the god-damned feelings kicked in. I fell for him, quite a bit. I wanted more, and I thought I could do it. The honest words he said, does hurt....
A. 19 October 2011: As far as jobs, unless you ar desperate for an income, don't lower your "standard" Finding and having a job you actually ENJOY can make such a difference.
As for planning. Some are planners, some are not. However, when you plan thing you always h... (read in full...)
My mother doesn't think my boyfriend is good enough for me
Q. I'm sorry guys, this will be a long story but I really need your help :( I've been with my bf for almost 2 years. At first our relationship is just soo wonderful. We love each other so much and both of our parents encourage our relation...
A. 17 October 2011: Your mom isn't dating him - YOU are. I think your mom should be more supportive of you. She should want you to be happy on YOUR terms.
... (read in full...)
For 16-18 year olds, what should we do for halloween?
Q. Sooooo, Halloween is coming up, me and all my different friends and "friend groups" want to do something. People like coming to my place, but there is noway I am having a halloween party. We think someone else might be throwing one, but can't b...
A. 17 October 2011: I would do a sleep-over with some good friends, maybe get dressed up and go to a Haunted House first ( if there is one close by) then head home watch scary movies .
As for costumes... Slutty is overrated. I would go with cute, scary or just rea... (read in full...)
I was dating his best friend but then he suddenly passed away, now the friend has feelings for me.....what should I do?
Q. I had been dating and working on a relationship with a childhood friend and he unexpectedly passed away. It has been three months and his best friend and I are now very close. I no that he has romantic feelings for me. I am attracted to him but I ...
A. 17 October 2011: Take it slow - see how you feel when you aren't grieving. Having a friend go through grief is a bonus, I wouldn't cut him off, but.. I wouldn't lead him on either.... (read in full...)
I was his rebound girl....how do I get over this?
Q. I was his rebound girl. I cannot believe it. I definitely knew what I got myself into, but the god-damned feelings kicked in. I fell for him, quite a bit. I wanted more, and I thought I could do it. The honest words he said, does hurt....
A. 17 October 2011: 1. How do you get over it? Well know that he got LUCKY in having you as a rebound and that it is HIS loss that he can't handle anything more. Next time take the time to get to know a guy before you jump into bed with him.
2. Get out there meet peo... (read in full...)
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