I was hospitalised for 10 days, and my LDR boyfriend sent nasty emails! Should I even bother to contact him?
Q. Hello to all on the site. I am so hurt and confused. I took ill around 10 days ago and had to be hospitalised. I am now back home and doing ok but am a bit shell shocked to discover that while I was on the ward, my boyfriend (who lives in France)...
A. 3 April 2014: As you TRIED to (yet again) give him the benefit of the doubt (which I don't blame you for, wanting to give him a chance is not something to "beat yourself" up about.)
So what's your plan now? To give him a few days to come up with somethin... (read in full...)
I was hospitalised for 10 days, and my LDR boyfriend sent nasty emails! Should I even bother to contact him?
Q. Hello to all on the site. I am so hurt and confused. I took ill around 10 days ago and had to be hospitalised. I am now back home and doing ok but am a bit shell shocked to discover that while I was on the ward, my boyfriend (who lives in France)...
A. 31 March 2014: There is nothing wrong with your brain. Insulting you isn't your fault.
And good for you for recognizing that you don't need or deserve that kind of treatment.
The thing with LDR is that when there is distance there is also active imaginati... (read in full...)
I was hospitalised for 10 days, and my LDR boyfriend sent nasty emails! Should I even bother to contact him?
Q. Hello to all on the site. I am so hurt and confused. I took ill around 10 days ago and had to be hospitalised. I am now back home and doing ok but am a bit shell shocked to discover that while I was on the ward, my boyfriend (who lives in France)...
A. 29 March 2014: Never accept that someone treats you badly, no matter what excuse THEY or you make up for it. (he was stressed, we haven't seen each other in a long time.. blah blah).
The first time it happens you stand up for yourself and if the excuse isn't a ... (read in full...)
I was hospitalised for 10 days, and my LDR boyfriend sent nasty emails! Should I even bother to contact him?
Q. Hello to all on the site. I am so hurt and confused. I took ill around 10 days ago and had to be hospitalised. I am now back home and doing ok but am a bit shell shocked to discover that while I was on the ward, my boyfriend (who lives in France)...
A. 26 March 2014: Yes, it possible.
Obviously you are game to him. He tries to control you by first being on the attack and then switching gears.
He will mostly think that you have forgotten all about his previous behavior and that you are grateful for his... (read in full...)
My boy keeps lying to me, but insists that he loves me and only me?
Q. Alright so before you tell me to just "dump his ass", actually think about this. Basically, the guy I'm with right now is the best guy ever. I love him to death. And he loves me. He does so much for me, as do his parents. Through his life, he has a...
A. 22 March 2014: Does it mean he needs counseling?
I'm not sure, the fact that he can EXPRESS how he feels (sometimes) I think is a good thing, and telling you :"I feel needy" I would say is a good thing in a relationship. Not many guys would do that.
I find ... (read in full...)
My boy keeps lying to me, but insists that he loves me and only me?
Q. Alright so before you tell me to just "dump his ass", actually think about this. Basically, the guy I'm with right now is the best guy ever. I love him to death. And he loves me. He does so much for me, as do his parents. Through his life, he has a...
A. 21 March 2014: The virgin thing gives it a whole other angle. That fact that me doesn't seem to WANT to have sex (after all he can't give a reason as to WHY) - but he wants to still feel like he is "the man" - which might be why he started on the "hot or not" ... (read in full...)
Fell pregnant after a holiday fling, now he wants to meet to discuss my choice!
Q. I fell pregnant after a holiday fling last year when my group of friend met a few guys at the same hotel. I decided to have an abortion because I wasn't in anyway ready for a child. Plus I couldn't see the child's father being supportive at all ...
A. 21 March 2014: Did you two have unprotected sex? If so how can he be mad AT ALL with the choice you made? He CHOSE to not bring a freaking condom and put it on. YOU chose to not bring a condom and TELL him to put it on.
You had a tough tough choice to make. I ... (read in full...)
My boy keeps lying to me, but insists that he loves me and only me?
Q. Alright so before you tell me to just "dump his ass", actually think about this. Basically, the guy I'm with right now is the best guy ever. I love him to death. And he loves me. He does so much for me, as do his parents. Through his life, he has a...
A. 21 March 2014: OP,
I forgot to ask you ONE question.
HOW did you met your BF?
Did you two start out texting/flitting? You know like he does with others girls now?
... (read in full...)
I want the money that my Dad saved for me while I was ill
Q. I have been on abilify for four years and have been slowly getting smaller doses. And I want to be off it cause of increased urinating, tremors muscle twitching. I was on Geodon for a while. I am really hoping to get off of it next week cause I got ...
A. 21 March 2014: I hear a lot of I WANT (almost like a tantrum) but I near none of respect for your parents.
I get that you WANT to be off your meds, but you really need to have your doctor help you with that. There was without a doubt a good reason you were put... (read in full...)
Facing the guy that hurt me, advice?
Q. Hi, I posted not long ago about my situation with a boyfriend who I met at my works meal and he was our waiter, he was very full on telling me that he loves me after 2 weeks and took me to meet his mum then dissappears on me and I never hear from ...
A. 21 March 2014: I would honestly pretend you don't know him. Like Cerberus said, he is just another waiter at the place.
And like Cerberus said, if he tries to talk to you (other then ask you what you want to eat) IGNORE him or gracefully decline.
FOCUS o... (read in full...)
My boy keeps lying to me, but insists that he loves me and only me?
Q. Alright so before you tell me to just "dump his ass", actually think about this. Basically, the guy I'm with right now is the best guy ever. I love him to death. And he loves me. He does so much for me, as do his parents. Through his life, he has a...
A. 21 March 2014: You didn't really come on DC for advice, you came on DC to hear that what he is doing is fine and normal and that you really have nothing to worry about. Because those are the lies you feed yourself. And those are the lies he feeds you.
What ... (read in full...)
I'm virtually going to be homeless and this man has hurt me more than I can say! I'm so lost and afraid, how do I cope?
Q. Hi everyone, would love some advice as this issue has gotten to bad its tearing me apart. A few months ago I was a single mum with a one year old. Then a friend ive known for years came into the picture and long story short we moved in with him. I g...
A. 21 March 2014: iAmHereToHelpYou put it so well, as a single mom you can't give up your independence of a job & home, you NEED to be able to take care of you and your child.
I would move in with family and reapply for housing and look for a job ASAP - and I wo... (read in full...)
I care what others think about my boyfriend's appearance!
Q. I am 29 and my boyfriend of 8 months is 31. When we first started our relationship, it was one of the most intense feelings I've felt. Every since a couple of months ago, it was almost like I woke up from a dream and I've become very obsessed about ...
A. 21 March 2014: It does sound petty and shallow.
If I see a couple where one partner is a 4 and the other a 9, I ASSUME that THEY have something good and deep going, because unlike what society tells you, looks aren't everything.
You could have a handsome ... (read in full...)
Why does my husband call me names and threaten me and then apologize?
Q. My husband is in jail for domestic violence and going to get deported. When I visit him he calls me names and threatens me and makes comments about other women in the room to try and make me feel jealous. After the visit he will call me and ...
A. 21 March 2014: He is an abuser, THAT is who he is. He rips you to shreds and then apologizes to make YOU feel sorry for him. Manipulation.
I would seriously get up and walk out next time and let him know you aren't coming back to see him.
HE is seriously aff... (read in full...)
I think my husband has a crush at work and its making me uncomfortable
Q. Would anyone else think anything of this? Or am I just being paranoid? My husband of 6 years has recently started a new job. He's been there about 2 months now. He works in a team of 7 others, one Man and six women. For the past 3 weeks he h...
A. 20 March 2014: I would suggest (not today though) but that you actually get to met her, I'm willing to be you will feel a WHOLE lot less threatened if you met her in person.
And I think he is trying to be a good friend, not hurt your feelings.... (read in full...)
I was hospitalised for 10 days, and my LDR boyfriend sent nasty emails! Should I even bother to contact him?
Q. Hello to all on the site. I am so hurt and confused. I took ill around 10 days ago and had to be hospitalised. I am now back home and doing ok but am a bit shell shocked to discover that while I was on the ward, my boyfriend (who lives in France)...
A. 20 March 2014: What do you do?
YOU get on your knees and THANK the stars that you are now better and that you had to go into the hospital because NOW you can CLEARLY see him for WHO he is. He doesn't trust you. AT ALL.
Then LET is e-mails go into the spam/tr... (read in full...)
Isn't it better to have loved and lost then to have never have loved at all?
Q. I met this girl while I was traveling in Thailand where I ended up saving her life, 3 months later she leaves Canada and comes to Australia for a year working/traveling. Everything was going great for the first few days then when we talking about...
A. 20 March 2014: Maybe for YOU it is, but she doesn't see it that way, so why keep pushing? You can't MAKE her want to be in a relationship and obviously she DOESN'T want one right now.
... (read in full...)
He screams at me, he disregards my opinion, he's paranoid about some friends. Can anyone confirm if I'm crazy?
Q. Am I crazy? My bf n I have been together for almost 2 years. We've been friends for almost 10 years. My bf can be very defensive, emotionally immature, and selfish at times; straight up. So these faults dampen a mood, conversation, experience every ...
A. 20 March 2014: Why are you still with him?
You have a forest full of red flag, yet you stick around. Why?
I agree with eyeswideopen, it's not about him being nuts. It's NUTS not walking away.... (read in full...)
Heard rumours about this married guy I like. Should I tell him about the rumours, without sounding jealous, nor like a gossip?
Q. I have a good friend in the office. In fact i've a crush on him but will never act on this feeling because he's married. Don't want to get hurt as going out with a married man, it's the worst thing of all to do. Guess he also feels attracted to...
A. 20 March 2014: Eh he is married AND a cheat, I'd leave him in his own mess. And I agree you will not score any "Brownie points" by telling him the office gossip.
Work and getting over that crush. It put you in a bad position. You say you don't want to be with ... (read in full...)
I'm interested but she's in the middle of heartbreak
Q. Here's the story, there's this girl who I've taken an interest in, when I started talking to her, really talking she suddenly opened up about this guy she's been seeing, she was madly in love with him but as it turned out he wasn't with her, ...
A. 20 March 2014: I would focus on being a friend first. She just dated a guy who used her, so she needs to feel OVER this guy before dating anyone.
IF she was MADLY in love with him, it will take her a while before she will be over him. People tend to go a little... (read in full...)
Is this a good time to tell him I have feelings for him?
Q. I've been casually dating a guy I work with for nearly 6mths now. We both work shifts so we see each other when we can. Its great and we get on really well. He had a heart attack 2wks ago and it was touch and go for a while. This has made me realise ...
A. 20 March 2014: I agree with CaringGuy.
Just spend time together. If he JUST had a heart attack then he needs to focus on getting better first, relationships are secondary right now.... (read in full...)
Does anyone know the meaning behind this song?
Q. Help song meaning??? 3 days grace sign of the times?? My boyfriend is listening to a few songs falls asleep to them. So if i know the meaning i can help cause i think he is sad if i done something wrong i can fix it. So that song and 3 days grace ...
A. 20 March 2014: Ask him?
Talk to him? ... (read in full...)
I think my husband has a crush at work and its making me uncomfortable
Q. Would anyone else think anything of this? Or am I just being paranoid? My husband of 6 years has recently started a new job. He's been there about 2 months now. He works in a team of 7 others, one Man and six women. For the past 3 weeks he h...
A. 20 March 2014: That does sound like a work- crush - however a work crush is more like a "bromance" (even if the other party is the opposite gender) then an actual crush.
I would tell him, you know you mention Kayleigh a lot and it makes me uncomfortable because ... (read in full...)
I masturbate to photos of girls I know. What do I say if they find out?
Q. I am a 16 year old guy. I am constantly on social networking. I've many a time found myself looking at my friend's who are girls pictures. I have a tendency to masturbate to people I know and I never feel guilty about it. Is this wrong? Does this ...
A. 20 March 2014: Is it wrong? In the sense that they don't know you USE their pictures and you are being creepy (sorry if you take their pictures from Facebook or what not, and wank to them, THAT is creepy in my book).
I suggest you think about it a bit. YOU are ... (read in full...)
Do you pressure for oral sex?
Q. Do you or your significant other like to give or receive oral sex? If not do you pressure them (the whole "if you love me" thing") or do you leave it alone? I've been with my boyfriend for some years. I don't get sexually frustrated, but I'm tryi...
A. 20 March 2014: OK I'm going to go with your BF being really inexperienced.
1. if you NEED lube, you aren't turned on enough.
2. you aren't going to GET orgasms from him inserting finger(s) inside your vagina. He needs to READ up or explore your clitoris. A... (read in full...)
I'm feeling like a fool after calling my ex again
Q. I was at work Saturday past and i was thinking of my ex so i decided to call him, we talked and then he started to bring up the past so it lead to arguing and now he says that he feels good that he made me mad. My question is y do he keeps bringing ...
A. 20 March 2014: Maybe OP, you needed to call so you could be REMINDED that he wasn't/isn't the guy for you?
Instead of beating yourself up take a little time to be a little introspective - look back and I'm sure you can find plenty of clues to the fact that he ... (read in full...)
How can I succeed at dating? Because I have decided to try dating, instead of visiting an escort.
Q. Some weeks ago I posted about seeing an escort as a way to experience intimacy, but several women have replied to my post. I have thought about what they said realize seeing a escort won't fix anything. Today I decide at end of my class to just to ...
A. 20 March 2014: You are still over-thinking it.
If you at some point down the line met a girl I presume you will tell her you are a full time student living at home? Which means she knows you aren't rolling in money. Staying at home while going to college ... (read in full...)
We can't have sex unless we are in a certain position. Is it the height difference?
Q. Hi, I have started having sex w a new guy. He's 6'5" and I'm 5'5". For some reason he can't ever get his dick inside me unless I pull my legs up. Why is that? Is it because of the height differential? I don't get it! ...
A. 20 March 2014: Height have nothing to do with sex or great sex. I think he isn't very experienced in various positions. Or HE just likes you to have your legs up like that.
... (read in full...)
Will she give me another chance after calling her bad names for going out with other guys
Q. we met on zoosk and it was fantasic we hit it off TOO WELL and talked for 5 hour a day she called me in the morning and at work and we talked all night. we wanted to wait to have sex but didn't so the 2nd date we ended up in bed... so i went home ...
A. 20 March 2014: Drama-llama!!!
Block her number, block her on Zoosk and I agree with Sage.. if you two were 15-16 I could understand all this tit for tat and ridiculous games, but you put 41-50 as your age group? If that is correct, you BOTH need to GROW up.... (read in full...)
Best friend going out with the guy I like and now I feel jealous
Q. Basically I fancy this guy in my class, I have done for a while. 3 weeks ago my best friend told me she also fancied him. I like to keep myself to myself so I hadn't mentioned I liked him but we texted and flirted quite often. He asked her out a ...
A. 20 March 2014: I think he friend-zoned you (even with the flirting) and that sucks. I agree that flirting/texting a guy, your best friend is seeing/dating, is not a good idea. I would just ignore them all. If you try and explain WHY you don't want to text any more ... (read in full...)
Fiance is having people at our home, not telling me and then lying when caught
Q. Need your perspective to work out if I an being unreasonable or not... found oout my fiance has been lying about people coming over to our house whilst I am out at work and am really annoyed at him for omitting to tell me, and lying about his day. ...
A. 20 March 2014: I do think you are being unreasonable, you "claim" you wanted the house to feel like his home too, yet he has to ASK permission and give you notice for his PARENTS to pop around and spend time with the grandchild? Seriously?
You CHOSE to change t... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is tired of my friend and her lying cheating boyfriend
Q. I don't really know who to ask about this so I thought id give this a go. I've got a close friend who has been seeing my boyfriends friend for about a year on and off. He has cheated on her and messed her around numerous times and he was expect...
A. 19 March 2014: Honestly, I don't blame your BF. Your friend is bringing drama to your relationship. He DUMPED his friend because he didn't approve of his behavior, that however doesn't mean you have to dump yours.
If I were you I would STOP bringing it ... (read in full...)
Do you pressure for oral sex?
Q. Do you or your significant other like to give or receive oral sex? If not do you pressure them (the whole "if you love me" thing") or do you leave it alone? I've been with my boyfriend for some years. I don't get sexually frustrated, but I'm tryi...
A. 19 March 2014: I don't think you should ever feel pressured to do something you don't like doing. BUT I agree that making your partner feel GREAT should not be a chore, it should be something you would want to do for him.
I don't like receiving oral (hubby i... (read in full...)
Should I get back with my ex even if he took advantage of me financially?
Q. My ex boyfriend broke up with me 4 days ago and after seeing him at work . He texted me Good job tonight and he feels hurt and embarrassed to take a break from relationship. Should I get back with him even if he took financially advantage of me? I...
A. 19 March 2014: Are you serious?
If a friend ASKED you that question what would you tell her? Sure, take him back let him use you a little bit longer, maybe he can take you for a little more.
Girl, you asked on DC because you ALREADY know what you should do. A... (read in full...)
How can I succeed at dating? Because I have decided to try dating, instead of visiting an escort.
Q. Some weeks ago I posted about seeing an escort as a way to experience intimacy, but several women have replied to my post. I have thought about what they said realize seeing a escort won't fix anything. Today I decide at end of my class to just to ...
A. 19 March 2014: I agree with Tisha, just LEARNING how to BE yourself around women is a GOOD thing and should be how you start all this out. Hold your horse on the whole sex thing.. IT will happen in time.
And yes, go back to your last post and RE-READ the advi... (read in full...)
I'm a woman and I dreamed I had a penis. What does it mean?
Q. Ok so this is really bugging me and just for reference I am a straight married female and I do not have any fantasies about other women at all. I know I'm more dominant than my husband in life but I don't want to be in bed. I had a crazy drea...
A. 19 March 2014: According to Freud - it's penis envy. (not that I buy into that.)
Also some say that for a woman to dream about a penis symbolizes overt sexuality and raw sexual desires.
Or To see a penis in your dream signifies sexual energy, power, a... (read in full...)
It's early days, but after just two dates - were his actions charming or creepy?
Q. Hi Agony Aunt folks I have a question , So I met this guy online we had 2 dates so far he is a cop and seems very nice a lot different form the last guy I dated I have had bad luck lately in the men department and seem to end up with abusive men so ...
A. 19 March 2014: REALLY odd. Creepy? Hm, not sure. What came to mind at first was getting a DNA sample from you LOL I guess I read to many crime novels......
He could have asked for a second spoon.
I have a huge fear/aversion/anxiety about germs so yea I w... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my parents' concerns about a joint mortgage with my partner?
Q. Hi guys Hope you can offer me some advice as I my head is in two minds. Basically, I have been gifted some money to get a mortgage and new home (Whoopie!). I have a lovely partner who I have been with for years. My parents want me to do ...
A. 19 March 2014: I agree with Sage for the most part.
I also thing sharing financial responsibility with someone who isn't your spouse can end up in a HUGE mess. (from a legal standpoint)
So what I WOULD do is talk to a solicitor. Have him draw up a document th... (read in full...)
How do we help an adopted child give a presentation about her life?
Q. Last year my brother adopted a wonderful 8 year old girl and she's fitting in very well with our family. Thing is, she's about to start my son's school and he had to do a life story project (with the help of an adult) two years ago when he was ...
A. 19 March 2014: Talk to her teacher.
And suggest to your brother that he TALKS to her about not HAVING to do this. She is 8, and shouldn't b stressed out about this.
That they can make the presentation about WHERE she came from? (as opposed to whom) Find pi... (read in full...)
I didn't want this breakup, how do I get over it with my dignity intact?
Q. I've been dating a man for almost a year. On numerous occasions, over the past year, he has asked for time and space bc he is dealing with something stressful with work or his family. I have respected this and have done my best to give him what he ...
A. 19 March 2014: If you are usually the one to pursue him then change your tactics and STOP.
I know it's easier said then done, but do you REALLY want to be with a guy who treats you that way?
Every time you want to reach out to him CALL someone (a frien... (read in full...)
I'm feeling like a fool after calling my ex again
Q. I was at work Saturday past and i was thinking of my ex so i decided to call him, we talked and then he started to bring up the past so it lead to arguing and now he says that he feels good that he made me mad. My question is y do he keeps bringing ...
A. 19 March 2014: Why? Who knows exactly why but you yourself were dragging through the past by calling him.
He knows exactly how to hurt you and how to get YOU going and last but not least HOW to make you FEEL miserable about yourself. And look he succeede... (read in full...)
I want my older sister and her kids to go back to her own home!
Q. Okay, so I have an older sister who is 34 years old!! and she really annoys the shit out of me. When she and her 3 kids come to visit my parents I avoid her and stay out of the way.But lately shes been coming over the weekends. Her kids are all ...
A. 18 March 2014: It's your parents house (yes and your home) BUT it's REALLY up to your MOM & DAD to decide if they want her there or not. You really don't have a say in it.
If she asks you to buy stuff or tell you to buy stuff - tell her to BUY it herself.... (read in full...)
Am I crossing the line? Why do I feel that I say inappropriate things in class?
Q. I need opinion whether I say inappropriate things all the time. I have this group of people in one of my language classes. A teacher is a woman in her late 40s, then few guys about the same age and few younger men and women but not by much. ...
A. 18 March 2014: Yea It can easily be THAT group of people if you otherwise get on well with people.
They can be judging you on the FIRST thing you said (that they didn't agree with and then EVERYTHING you say after that is painted in the same light) If you know... (read in full...)
Boyfriend made fun of me, says I dress to impress other men and then broke up with me!
Q. hello I am Iin desperate need of help! Last night me and my boyfriend got into an argument about him being very critical of everything I wear! He made jokes and basically called me a hoochie!I told him I didnt like Iit and he shouldnt call me that. ...
A. 18 March 2014: OK, he tried to CONTROL you by telling you that you can not dress the way you like. The way you like to dress means (to him) that you are trying to have other men look at you.
Whether he is right or not, HE tried to manipulate you and when you... (read in full...)
What kind of game is my ex playing? DId our kiss mean anything to hiim?
Q. So here's the story... meet my ex 4 years ago (2010), he broke up with me after 5 months (april to september) for his ex (who cheated on him before he met me) (Our relationship had everything one should have, trust, love, freedom etc) he then get...
A. 18 March 2014: You are his fall back girl. The rebound girl who he can ALWAYS count on to rub his ego JUST right. And I think you are his "revenge" for her past cheating. Because she cheated on him, he feels JUSTIFIED to do as he pleases as SHE made the first ... (read in full...)
He hasn't texted in a week and I'm wondering if I should contact him
Q. So, i met this guy from bbm about 5 months ago. We were having a nice chat. After talked for a long time, i think i kinda like him. He send me a message everyday. He asked about his family and my family, and all of his personal life and ask about ...
A. 18 March 2014: Calling you babe and telling that he loves you is fantasy. Sure it feels nice to hear but the guy doesn't REALLY know you.
I would let him be. If he was TRULY infatuated with you, he wouldn't leave you hanging for a week. And he WOULD find a w... (read in full...)
She broke up with me and I'm scared to let her into my heart again
Q. Me and my girlfreind broke up 2 weeks ago. She ended it and it was a massive shock. She said her feelings weren't as strong and didn't love me. I loved this girl sooo much and i ask her to give us some space and see. I call her before (yes i kn...
A. 18 March 2014: I agree with CMMP
She has already told you that she doesn't LOVE you as much as YOU love her. I would without a doubt cancel the meeting and stop talking to her. Friendship is not possible for you two for now.
GIVE yourself some time and so... (read in full...)
Am I crossing the line? Why do I feel that I say inappropriate things in class?
Q. I need opinion whether I say inappropriate things all the time. I have this group of people in one of my language classes. A teacher is a woman in her late 40s, then few guys about the same age and few younger men and women but not by much. ...
A. 18 March 2014: Well, I think in the sense that you made your "jokes" based on experiences of your friends that maybe that is why they took it as inappropriate or offensive. Or just a little as a foot in mouth.
Your friend might make self deprecating jokes ab... (read in full...)
I didn't want this breakup, how do I get over it with my dignity intact?
Q. I've been dating a man for almost a year. On numerous occasions, over the past year, he has asked for time and space bc he is dealing with something stressful with work or his family. I have respected this and have done my best to give him what he ...
A. 17 March 2014: This man is constantly looking of an out. But once he has had his "space" he kind of misses the GF-experience (NOT HAVING a GF) but someone who cares about you, take care OF you, gives you affection and sex, and boost your ego.
How do you end it w... (read in full...)
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