I've been waiting for him to get the divorce and get a mortgage with me, and now that he says he will, I'm not as excited as I thought I would be!
Q. You may know from previous posts I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years. We have just had a weeks break as I could not cope anymore with only seeing him once a week. I have taken up Ho vies and made new friends but at the end of he day I still ...
A. 1 July 2014: The ring while it might be pretty... is a hold out tactics. And then he goes on holiday with his daughter? Nothing planned with you? At all?
He thinks the ring will keep you around, he gave HIMSELF ANOTHER 2 years to wait. Wanna bet... in 2 years ... (read in full...)
When and how are you supposed to know when the end to a relationship is coming?
Q. I wonder , now my ex girlfriend, I thought every thing was going fantastic, then one day in the park she said it was over, out of the blue. So what am asking, when and how are you supposed to know, when it is coming, I treated her good, her ex beat ...
A. 7 June 2014: Sometime it's clear as day, sometimes it's not.
Don't beat yourself up for not knowing, or for her choosing to go back to the dud of an ex.
I would date someone less complicated next time.... (read in full...)
He's ignoring me & I don't know why
Q. I have been getting to know this guy and we have gotten close but not really in a full relationship, more like friends taking it slow. I do want more and had hoped for this in the future. Because he is getting over a break up I am not pushing ...
A. 7 June 2014: I agree with WiseOwlE
He is hypersensitive due to his resent break up (OR because he is a hypersensitive sort of fella anyways).
No more messages. And honestly, you are both adults so I don't get why it's through PM on Facebook that you communi... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is asking me to go to lunch with him to see his ex perfect girlfriend and I am freaking out!
Q. My boyfriend of 1 year is going for lunch with one of his exs. I know 2 of his ex-girlfriends, as they are part of our social cicle. One of them is just an acquaintance, the other is actual a good friend os us both, and we go out several times. N...
A. 7 June 2014: I'd met her and I would be nice to her. My guess is SHE IS just a friend. HE could easily have snuck out to lunch with her and never told you, instead he ASKED you to come. THAT means, you MEAN a LOT to him.
Don't overdress, but look put together... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got drunk and his friends called his ex to come get him, not me!
Q. I'm so angry right now that I feel like I could burst! My boyfriend of 10 months spent the night at his ex wife's house after a drunken night out with pals, and even though I believe him when he says nothing happened, mainly because when he is THAT ...
A. 7 June 2014: I agree fully with Auntie YouWish.
He knows WHY you are upset, but playing dense. I have to say if he can't hold his liquor maybe he needs to quit drinking...
I would really question WHY his friends would call her over you as well, UNLESS he ... (read in full...)
I don't understand what this teacher is doing
Q. hey, so i have never really told any one this , atleast not all the details and i really need some advice , honest advise so all this started last year around this time, my tutor commented on one of my pictures which i set, i was half asleep w...
A. 6 June 2014: Listen to Mark's post.
HE is grooming you. No he doesn't LOVE you, but he would LOVE to get you naked (and so forth).
He is MARRIED with children. YOU are a young girl and HIS student. YOU should be off limits. He shouldn't even be texting ... (read in full...)
How can I make my mother understand that my cousin is like a best friend to me?
Q. my cousin recently got out of prison. he was there 3 years for sexual abuse. he is like a best friend to me. he is 26, and im 14. everytime i even sit near him my mom practicley yells at me! she thinks he would do something to me but i believe he ...
A. 6 June 2014: Honey, no one goes to prison for sexual abuse UNLESS they COMMITTED it towards someone ELSE.
IF he was in prison for ABUSING someone else then your MOM is only trying to protect you and if I were you.. and if YOU had an ounce of smarts YOU woul... (read in full...)
I've been waiting for him to get the divorce and get a mortgage with me, and now that he says he will, I'm not as excited as I thought I would be!
Q. You may know from previous posts I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years. We have just had a weeks break as I could not cope anymore with only seeing him once a week. I have taken up Ho vies and made new friends but at the end of he day I still ...
A. 6 June 2014: I think you deserve better, or rather MORE then he is willing to give you.
It's OK to be sad, hurt and angry - but take some time with NO CONTACT and let yourself move on. YOU have put in 5 years with this guy and when push came to shove...... (read in full...)
Neighbor asked my daughter to be bridesmaid then cancelled the big wedding and now I'm stuck with a dress and shoes!
Q. My Nextdoor neighbour was due to get married in August and asked my 7 year old daughter to be bridesmaid. My daughter was thrilled as she'd never been a bridesmaid before and it was probably her only chance (before shes an adult)as all our ...
A. 6 June 2014: If the wedding hadn't been cancelled you should still be 200 out.
What you SHOULD have done was find a lightly USED dress and not spend 200.
Now IF your neighbor showed you the dress she wanted your daughter to wear, and told you it was your ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend who works as a stripper, gets drunk at work and has things done to her, is jealous of my female friends on Facebook and insists that I un-friend them.
Q. Hi, my girlfriend of about a year broke up for a couple of months ...got back together 2 months ago. During that time I made made friends on facebook with a girl from work. There was a brief flirty exchange when she accepted my friend request but ...
A. 6 June 2014: Don't date a stripper if you can't accept her job. NOT many men can, but DATING a stripper HAS NOTHING to do with you flirting with a cute young co-worker. And HER job doesn't make it OK for you to do so either.
Why did she throw a fit and thro... (read in full...)
Why wont my boyfriend give me oral sex?
Q. why wont my boyfriend give me oral sex..... i have been with my partner for almost 3 years we have a 9 month old little boy together and im 2 months pregnant with our 2nd baby our sex life is great but i started to notice recently that my partner ...
A. 6 June 2014: So next time he says "give me head" you tell him, I'm not into that?
Honestly though, if he isn't a fan of giving oral isn't that fair enough? Just like if you didn't like it he shouldn't PRESUME to get them all the time either.
Sex is about ... (read in full...)
Don't like being friend with my ex, but there is no way
Q. Hi everybody, Since ever the one in the group that is single and always dating new girls and all the past relations were like heaven. Everybody likes me, even my ex-girlfriends and I love everybody, I was happy. There was a girl whom I always lik...
A. 6 June 2014: Don't presume that your NEW GF understand. Talk to her. And maybe pick out places you didn't go with the ex.
What was the argument about? You having a weird face? Or acting strange?
My guess is she figured your reaction to seeing the ex me... (read in full...)
My gf has constant mood swings, especially around that time of the month and completely takes it all out on me but the moment I have ONE bad day myself, it's the end of the world. Why is that? How is that fair?
Q. I need some advice. Maybe from the guys who have experienced this, personally, but also from the girls who can possibly explain this phenomenon. I always feel like my gf has constant mood swings, especially around that time of the month, and compl...
A. 6 June 2014: How is it fair? It's not.
So that is pretty simple.
YOU have hormones too you know. So the whole she has hormones is a sucktastic excuse.
Is she on Birth-control? Has she seen her doctor about these mood swings? I'm saying this because SOME... (read in full...)
Don't like being friend with my ex, but there is no way
Q. Hi everybody, Since ever the one in the group that is single and always dating new girls and all the past relations were like heaven. Everybody likes me, even my ex-girlfriends and I love everybody, I was happy. There was a girl whom I always lik...
A. 6 June 2014: Whom did you argue with? You new GF or your ex?
... (read in full...)
Should I give this woman more support even though I know we will never be together?
Q. I'm wondering what I should do here. I am middle aged man who has been divorced for around 1.5 years after a long term marriage. I still care about my ex-wife though who basically decided she wanted to move to Florida and not be married any longer ...
A. 6 June 2014: I would not muddy the water with a sexual relationship. What you are doing for her is pretty great. And as long as YOU and YOURS don't suffer for it, I think it's rather admirable to help her out. I would make SURE she understand it's a 12 months ... (read in full...)
Living together 3 years and it looks like he has no plans for marriage!
Q. I have been going out with a man for 3 years now. We live together and He has a son whom lives with him from a previous relationship. Me and the son get on great :) and there is not issues with the boys mother. My thing is after 3 years together...
A. 6 June 2014: Wow, he got you conned good! You are the "build in" or "live in" nanny, maid and I'm sure sex buddy too.
I'm sorry you are STILL so young so to settle for a guy who ISN'T ready for marriage ( I don't think he is) or kids (even though he HAS one,... (read in full...)
Am I mad to take on a guy with these issues???
Q. Ok, for the last 5 months I've befriended a gorgeous guy who has quite a few issues! Firstly, he is a recovering alcoholic, off the alcohol for 21 years, secondly, he has been self medicating for the last year and is currently in hospital trying to ...
A. 6 June 2014: I think what he was really looking for was someone who wanted to listen to him. Make HIM feel better. Make him do better.
And you did all that for him, which is a good thing.
I don't think he is ready to be ANYONE's BF. He just have to man... (read in full...)
Any ideas of what could be going through her mind? Why did she act so weird?
Q. Maybe this problem will resolve itself sooner than I'll hear from y'all, but I'm stuck at work for the next hour with nothing to do and this on my mind, so here goes: Met this girl through a friend 3ish weeks ago. Immediately hit it off really we...
A. 6 June 2014: I would totally back off. IF she wants to talk, LET her be the one to make the first move now. YOU have given her ample opportunity to say what she thinks.
Since you met through friend have you asked the friend that know her what's up with her... (read in full...)
Guys: Would you date a girl if you knew she had done nude modeling? Would that change your outlook towards her? And would you be able to see her as being more than a sex object?
Q. I have been modeling for an online swimwear site. I was approached by a porn site for nude modeling... The money they offered was amazing! I told them I would NEVER do photos with a man or another woman... Guys: Would you date a girl if you knew...
A. 6 June 2014: I think as LONG as you can stand BY the pictures they take and POST online for EVERYONE to see, I think MANY guys won't have a problem.
I DO think however, there will be plenty who will think less of you. It's the typical double standard. If you s... (read in full...)
How wrong was I? Was she wrong? And is it healthy for someone to move on that fast?
Q. So this girl I dated for 2 years her and I broke up like 3 weeks ago. Before we broke up I was a real jerk to her for example when she would ask me a question I would answer it like I didn't care. I didn't do anything that bad I would never cheat on ...
A. 6 June 2014: How long were you a "jerk" for? Because it can be she was "over" you long before she ended it. Which means her dating someone new already isn't straight out of the gate, so to speak.
People move on in different speeds, and different ways. SOME do ... (read in full...)
How do you know if it's going to be just FWBs or lead to something else? I want to avoid being used!
Q. This is a general question which I'm sure will have varied opinions but I'm asking because of situations I've been in which I just don't know how I could have prevented. I'm going to use the classic girl / boy situation because it seems the most ...
A. 5 June 2014: I think a LOT of this drama can be avoided by ASKING the right questions and asking EARLY on.
Like WHAT are you looking for - a relationship or something casual?
You might run into guys who say one thing but mean another, as in... they SAY t... (read in full...)
I wasn't the one who messed up so why am I the one hurting?
Q. My ex and I had been together almost 4 years. He moved from England to Canada with me 3 years ago in August. We definitely had our rough patches, mainly to do with him speaking inappropriately to other girls. Anyway, on Sunday morning I checke...
A. 5 June 2014: I agree with WiseOwlE.
Go get a full spectrum STD panel done.
Secondly, STOP apologizing and trying to get him back. The relationship is OVER. IT has been for quite a while, at least for him. I think YOU knew that but were/are in a bit of deni... (read in full...)
Is he treating his friend unfairly now that we are back together?
Q. Hi everybody, I'm not sure If I have a question or whether I would just value your views on this matter. Me and my boyfriend got together at 18 and have been together just under 5 years. Back last October our circumstances changed drastica...
A. 5 June 2014: I think I would let your BF decide that this guy really is an ASSHAT and ditch him without YOU telling him, that is what you'd like him to do.
I would REFUSE to discus the guy or hear about him.
YOUR BF is (hopefully ) smart enough to realiz... (read in full...)
I'm too scared to move on.
Q. Hey aunts and uncles I've recently come out of a four year relationship. I had been planning the break up for some time as he was abusive (mentally and emotionally). He would use emotional blackmail to get me to do things for him and if we argu...
A. 5 June 2014: Maybe, you need to focus on dealing with the last relationship, why you allowed him to treat you that way (and btw GOOD for you for leaving). BEFORE getting into a new relationship.
You need to deal with your own guilt first. And you NEED to ... (read in full...)
Did she lie about being pregnant / having an abortion?
Q. I hooked up with this girl 9 weeks ago, we're both teenagers, she told me she loved me after knowing me for only a day. she became annoying and shes a psycho so I blocked her number for 2 weeks. After we had sex she asked me "what if I wasnt really ...
A. 5 June 2014: Amen to Auntie Cindy's & CMMP's posts.
USE FREAKING CONDOMS if you DO NOT want children or STD's. YOU can not RELY on the girl to ALWAYS be on the pill, to be truthful about it OR even be sane.
DON'T be a moron and DON'T be a statistic - yet ... (read in full...)
He says on his profile he wants to date 1 woman but he asked Me for FWB-FB and he is seeing others???
Q. On the dating site he said he was looking to date ONE woman 1 on 1 now he asked me if I " was "cool being F**ck Buddies"! I'm really attracted to him and think we could be together well if he let's me in-should I agree and see if things develop ...
A. 5 June 2014: I think it's VERY common for guys (and some women too) to say they are LOOKING for that ONE person in their online profile, instead of saying looking for a F-buddies.
Because..... Saying you are looking to ONE person. Makes women (like yourself... (read in full...)
Will my wife ever get over me leaving her?
Q. I left my wife of 20 years about a year and a half ago. We had been arguing for most of our marriage about everything possible (money, how to bring up the children etc.) and had no common interests, and I just had enough so I found a flat and left. ...
A. 5 June 2014: 20 years is a long time to "just get over". Maybe for her it's the matter of not WANTING to be alone, more then WANTING to be with you.
Better the "devil" you know.
My husband divorced his ex wife 25 years ago, she never remarried and ha... (read in full...)
I am looking for the outsider's view.
Q. I have a friend who initially started out as someone I had a flirtation with. It was very intense and we became emotionally involved with each other. For various reasons her and I being together is not possible. The flirting and telling each other ...
A. 5 June 2014: My question is... Does it matter if she still have feelings for you?
If you two can't BE together (other then as friends) I would honestly, just NOT go there. I would enjoy her company for breakfast as the good friend she now is. Otherwis... (read in full...)
I want to do what is correct, should our adult children meet before we marry?
Q. I'm planning to get married in a month or so there is one adult child on my side and 3 on my Fiancée side, would it be inapporiate to marry before the children all meet? ...
A. 5 June 2014: I don't think there is ONE correct answer here.
IF they are all aware that you have been dating and are getting married I would think it was a good idea that they get to meet. Who not have a cook out or a dinner and invite them all? Personal... (read in full...)
Friend with benefits has an ex visiting from overseas and told me not to contact him or visit him while she's here! What should I do?
Q. I have been seeing and sleeping with a man for just over 9 months now. Just out of the blue, he told me his ex from the USA is coming over to stay with him for a month. First he said it was without warning, and then his story changed, saying it was ...
A. 4 June 2014: Should you go around and tell her what? That you have been fucking her ex? WHY?
Instead of being petty & jealous (and yea, that IS petty) END this FWB or whatever it is, YOU want a proper relationship, HE doesn't. And now you know.
JUST en... (read in full...)
Should I trust my own opinions about my new manager, or believe what the secretary says about her?
Q. I recently started a new job (office work). The manager is nice at a glance. She is a bit picky and micromanages but what manager doesn't? Anyway there is a secretary working here and from day 1 she has tried to misguide my opinion about my mana...
A. 4 June 2014: I think (if I were you) I would let the secretary know (next time she talks smack about the boss) that you appreciate her concern, but that you don't want to gossip about people. And if she starts up, walk away - make an excuse and walk away. She ... (read in full...)
How do I Make him stop flirting and cheating?
Q. We have been married for 16yrs, with two children, our youngest is 16. From 2005 my husband has been cheating on me. In 2010 we almost got divorced but he apologised and vowed to stop and seek counselling but that didn't happen. We have been to ...
A. 4 June 2014: You can't make him stop.
It isn't so much that he is "addicted" as you call it, it is because HE doesn't see ANYTHING wrong with what he is doing and he KNOWS that you will fuss a while but not leave.
If you don't want to be with a man who D... (read in full...)
Am I being a gold digger?
Q. I am in a struggle. I met a nice guy last August and we have been dating ever since. Prior to that I was in a long relationship with a man from the US. He is starting to put a bit of pressure on me to take the relationship to the next level and I ...
A. 4 June 2014: I think it depends on your priorities here.
IF being with a guy who can't SPEND time with you, vacation time or otherwise - I mean if he works 12 hour days HOW much is left for you?
If living IN Toronto is a priority, and the two of you combi... (read in full...)
Is this long distance relationship worth sticking with?
Q. I'm in a LDR I see my boyfriend 20-25 days in a year, I'm feeling like he doesn't care too much anymore. It's all about his work, where he wants to leave and I'm expected to be happy with that. Is it worth being in a relationship like that? ...
A. 4 June 2014: I think 3ish weeks out of 52 week, is not really sustainable for making ANY relationship work.
And add that you are unhappy about it makes it even harder.
Have you two no plans of moving closer?
How long have this been going on?
... (read in full...)
A row after dating for 7 weeks and he's backed off. Should I leave it?
Q. Myself and the guy I'm dating had our first argument last week. (We've only been together seven weeks), it wasn't so much an argument but a disagreement over his behavior. He got all defensive, as well as going on the offensive to the point wer...
A. 4 June 2014: I would wish him Good Luck in a text, but otherwise leave it. Even if you two had an argument you can still be a nice person.
However, IF after ONLY 7 weeks you are finding faults in his behavior (I'm curious as to what fault that is btw) then may... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my husband's constant lies?
Q. My husband and I have been together for four years, married for two. Everything is great in our relationship about 99% of the time, but his constant little white lies are causing huge arguments and it's really starting to rip us apart. His lies ...
A. 4 June 2014: Sit him down and ask him. Be calm, but this NEEDS to be talked out. He NEEDS to understand what he is doing is detrimental to the marriage and how you perceive him.
WHY do you feel you have to lie to me? (and don't accept a I don't know answer).... (read in full...)
I have lost a good friend in favour of my relationship. How can I make both people happy?
Q. I have a problem which is eating me up so I really need some advice as I don't like turning to those around me. I have an amazing, gorgeous, hilarious boyfriend. We're different, but we work. I love him, completely, and although he tries to hide it,...
A. 4 June 2014: YOU need to shit or get off the pot.
I get that your future isn't carved in stone, not with your life nor your BF. He has a job that takes him away (a lot) and you will have to be a VERY independent woman to make it work, but you will ALSO hav... (read in full...)
This married guy knows I have a crush on him and he touched and kissed me and said, "lets be casual". What does he mean by that?
Q. here's this guy a married man 47 yrs old, he's my friend and most of his family members were my friend also. last year i realized i really like him (crush). but i kept it inside me. he's so nice to me and whenever we see each other he always f...
A. 4 June 2014: Ewww, this is a simple case of.... DIRTY OLD man.
He has found a young impressionable girl who is naive enough to think all this attention means she is SUPER special and that he cares. Like Mark said, he is trying to GROOM you.
The dude want... (read in full...)
Should I just skip going to his country now after his response?
Q. What would you do in this situation? I met this cute guy on my last trip last year to a foreign country. I was by myself and I went to this bar. He owns it. We started talking and he offered to show me around. Was very sweet, but we never were...
A. 4 June 2014: I would also remove him from your travel plans. I would not go out of my way to stop by his country or bar.
I think he is back peddling like a DUCK on his offer to show you his country and the mountains. Why waste a couple of days there, if you c... (read in full...)
I either want her back or to treat her as an acquaintance
Q. This past Thursday I was dumped my girlfriend who also happens to be a co-worker. I had left a rose outside her door the previous day, and I knew by her lukewarm response that she had already made up her mind to end the relationship. I was prepared ...
A. 4 June 2014: I would next time she texts you, let her know that you can't be texting and chatting because it is confusing. She is TRYING to be nice, no doubt, but it is giving you hope that she will change her mind. I don't think she will.
Tell her you need... (read in full...)
Pregnant from a fling -- how do I tell him?
Q. I feel like I just made a huge mistake and I'm about to pay for it forever. I don't need any judgey comments, I just need guidance. Please, help me! I met a slightly older, thankfully SINGLE man two months ago and got pregnant by him after just one ...
A. 4 June 2014: Wow. He seems like a good provider? So I might have the baby... Seriously? I'm sorry that just sounds so callous.
Anyhow, yes I DO think you should tell him. He is OLD enough to know that sex can have consequences. He might TRY and claim the baby... (read in full...)
He always has an excuse -- how do I call him on it without seeming clingy?
Q. I have been on and off with a man for almost a year. We care deeply for eachother but I sometimes feel he is taking the lend out of me. We arrange dates and outings but when the day arrives he always cancels and I am left feeling very low about ...
A. 4 June 2014: I would stop making plans with him. THAT simple.
You talk about caring DEEPLY for each other, YOU might care deeply for him, but I'm not so sure his feelings are as strong.
Because, IF he CARED DEEPLY for you, he would MAKE time, you would ... (read in full...)
Don't like being friend with my ex, but there is no way
Q. Hi everybody, Since ever the one in the group that is single and always dating new girls and all the past relations were like heaven. Everybody likes me, even my ex-girlfriends and I love everybody, I was happy. There was a girl whom I always lik...
A. 26 May 2014: You can be friendly but being her friend IS NOT doing you any good.
I'd stop hanging out with HER alone. IF she is there at an event, be polite but try and socialize with everyone else.
I would be HONEST with her, tell her it HURTS to hang ou... (read in full...)
I've been waiting for him to get the divorce and get a mortgage with me, and now that he says he will, I'm not as excited as I thought I would be!
Q. You may know from previous posts I have been with my boyfriend for 5 years. We have just had a weeks break as I could not cope anymore with only seeing him once a week. I have taken up Ho vies and made new friends but at the end of he day I still ...
A. 7 May 2014: If he is still married getting a mortgage with him is the DUMBEST (sorry) thing you can do.
NO MORTGAGE til the divorce is final. And I strongly suggest that IF you two do NOT marry but share mortgage that you MAKE sure there is a PIECE of paper... (read in full...)
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