How do I deal with my hatred and bitterness towards women?
Q. How do I remove my hatred and bitterness towards women for them expecting guys to make the first move? Doing the approaching and asking out, initiating/escalating, taking the lead? I hate this one sided dynamic with a huge passion, even though I am ...
A. 12 September 2014:
To quote Mark D. White, Ph.D. (philosophy)
http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/maybe-its-just-me/201310/does-everyone-find-confidence-attractive
" It’s an awareness of who you are, regardless of how you compare or measure up to ot... (read in full...)
What are the best options to get through these issues with my partner's 28 year old daughter?
Q. My partner's 28 year old daughter has never accepted me into her father's life. She pretends I don't exist. At first I would have done almost anything to get her to talk to me. Now 9 years on I don't care, but now she has decided to pop back int...
A. 8 September 2014: So this has happen before. Your partner is "taking" her side 100%. Which isn't really too odd as she is his daughter and if he had to pick one of you, clearly it would be his "child".
Then there is also the whole embarrassment. After all, did he F... (read in full...)
How Do I End Our Relationship?
Q. Hello everyone, So I've been talking to this girl I met for about three months now and I've come to the conclusion things aren't going to really work out between us, there's a lot of reasons but mainly we're just at different points in our life. Th...
A. 7 September 2014: You can't control how she reacts, but you can make the break up less emotional, if you know her well enough.
I say, the sooner you break up the better, don't drag it out.
And be honest, tell her that you feel bad, but that you just don't feel ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with my hatred and bitterness towards women?
Q. How do I remove my hatred and bitterness towards women for them expecting guys to make the first move? Doing the approaching and asking out, initiating/escalating, taking the lead? I hate this one sided dynamic with a huge passion, even though I am ...
A. 7 September 2014: Well, you could start out with STOP blaming women for you not having found someone. HATING WOMEN for a standard that have been created by men? It's not really fair, is it?
I'm sorry buddy, you do NOT get issued a girl-friend or fuck buddy on your ... (read in full...)
I do not want to send him the pictures he asks for. Why should I send these pictures?
Q. im dating tanzanian man since like 7 months ago we chatting every day online. he is calling me on viber...he sent me pictures of his private parts,and he said he wants pictures of my private parts. i said yes to him but i do not want to send suc...
A. 7 September 2014: Nope if you DO NOT want to send any then don't. Send a picture of a hairless cat or something.
HE chose to send you picture - you didn't ask for dick-shots, correct? If so, you do NOT owe him ANY pictures pack. HE volunteer the pictures. THAT was... (read in full...)
What are the best options to get through these issues with my partner's 28 year old daughter?
Q. My partner's 28 year old daughter has never accepted me into her father's life. She pretends I don't exist. At first I would have done almost anything to get her to talk to me. Now 9 years on I don't care, but now she has decided to pop back int...
A. 7 September 2014: For a 28 (or even 21) year old it's kind of ridiculous that she thinks by ignoring you and being rude to you will get her parents back together. If she was 4-10 y/o I can see it.
So my advice is to talk to your partner, and ask for his input on... (read in full...)
How should I handle this friend's unwelcome comments?
Q. I'm really upset and need a bit of advice please. I'm recovering from a 20 year relationship and it's been 3 years now since I've been alone. My ex was abusive and alcoholic and it's taking me a long time to recover. I always worked and had m...
A. 6 September 2014: Accdept that she IS this very opinionated person. And that SHE is allowed to have her own opinion, JUST like YOU are allowed yours.
IF you WANT to buy a house in a "rough" neighborhood then that is YOUR choice. Personally, I get wher she is comin... (read in full...)
Texting - he said he could tame me sexually so I gave him some back and he didnt like it!
Q. There's this guy I've met offline and he and I are 12 years apart. I don't know if it's the age difference or my immaturity that's causing him to shun me for my behavior. We were texting about sex and he said he could tame me and I started talking a ...
A. 6 September 2014: Good thing that you have some common sense :)
You are right that he doesn't know you, you don't know him. I think he is a little bit in fantasy land? He likes the IDEA of you, but ONLY as HE want to see you. If that makes sense? That could ea... (read in full...)
Could he really be in love with both of us?
Q. I had to meet my ex recently (broke up couple months ago - he fell in love with someone else at work). He had something of mine that I needed back. Think I was ready to meet him and glad I did, we chatted for about an hour and he left. During our ...
A. 6 September 2014: Well, I think he CAN have feelings for both of you, though I'm not sure he actually does, and I don't think EITHER of you are his priority. I think him telling you he still cares about you, is to ensure he can keep you as a "SPARE" in case this NEW ... (read in full...)
Texting - he said he could tame me sexually so I gave him some back and he didnt like it!
Q. There's this guy I've met offline and he and I are 12 years apart. I don't know if it's the age difference or my immaturity that's causing him to shun me for my behavior. We were texting about sex and he said he could tame me and I started talking a ...
A. 6 September 2014: Yea, I agree he can dish out, but he can't take it.
My guess is he wanted to "groom" you to be his perfect little sex toy and when you showed you actually have a mind and will on your own, he lost interest.
I think he was having a fantasy... (read in full...)
Guys, what would you prefer?
Q. In general, do men prefer a gorgeous woman (say 8/10) who isn't very good at, or interested in, sex? Or do they prefer a more average looking girl (say 6.5/10) who is more sexual? ...
A. 6 September 2014: I don't think you can generalize this question.
Some guy who do not have a high sex drive themselves might be ecstatic for a gorgeous girl with and equally low sexdrive. Whereas a guy who is the "average" horny might tire of the all she is good ... (read in full...)
What are the best options to get through these issues with my partner's 28 year old daughter?
Q. My partner's 28 year old daughter has never accepted me into her father's life. She pretends I don't exist. At first I would have done almost anything to get her to talk to me. Now 9 years on I don't care, but now she has decided to pop back int...
A. 6 September 2014: Well we can hope she will have to grace and good manners to behave, though that may not happen.
So what can you do? The week she is there make plans with friend and family, that way father and daughter can spend time together and you won't ha... (read in full...)
New to dating and the drama that goes with it
Q. I have a dilemma. My rating for my advice is kinda sucky, so I've decided to step on the other side of things. I have problems with social life too, like most people on the Internet. So here it is: Ok, it's my first time going out. I've been p...
A. 6 September 2014: Don't pity date. Unless you are interested don't go out on dates with a guy, suggest going as friend instead, that way you won't end up having to break up with a guy you never wanted to date in the first place.
Since you already said yes, I think ... (read in full...)
My crush likes my friend instead... should I still try to impress him?
Q. Dear Cupid, Oh gosh, so I have an enormous crush on a boy in my grade. I have just started high school with him and we talk often enough. However, today he told me he liked another girl, one of my closest friends. What do I do? I want to impress ...
A. 6 September 2014: I wouldn't try to impress him. Just because You crush on him doesn't mean he feels the same, no matter how much you try to impress him.
You can't "make" another person like you in "that" way.
I know it sucks, but I would look elsewhere got a ... (read in full...)
How do I encourage him without scaring him off?
Q. I like this guy I mat a couple of years ago, on an exchange trip to Germany (we both live in England and are 17). I told him I liked him, and we've met up a couple of times since then, once with mutual friends and once on our own (although it wasn't ...
A. 5 September 2014: I think the more time you two spend together (not texting but in person) the easier this will become.
And like WiseOwlE said, go slow.... (read in full...)
Is this a lesbian attraction?
Q. I am TY student, 19 years old, good in studies. I am in a relationship with my boyfriend. I have a teacher in my college,she is married and have a year old son. she may be of 28 or 29 years of age. she is a good teacher. she is very friendly, frank ...
A. 5 September 2014: I agree with CaringGuy.
No need to tell her how you feel. She can't reciprocate and she might NOT feel the same way.
JUST because you like her, doesn't mean SHE has to feel the same way.
I think she just sees you as someone who needs a litt... (read in full...)
Can't get past the hurt from his cheating
Q. I found out 4 years ago my husband had a 6 year affair with a ex-girlfiend,we have been married for 29 years,i found out he sent money,gifts,she live in another state,when I confronted him about the imformation I had before me,he begin to cry and ...
A. 5 September 2014: So he cheated on you and THEN blamed you for it? That is pretty low and pretty "classic" cheater attitude.
You know he COULD have talked to you instead of cheating. He COULD have tried to WORK on the marriage instead of cheating.... Instead ... (read in full...)
Ex girlfriend says she needs time
Q. I still love my ex girlfriend and tried to get her back, but it turned out she was seeing someone new. That's ended, but she won't see me. She said she's too confused and needs time to think. What does too confused mean? Does this mean she ...
A. 4 September 2014: Yes, leave her be and DO NOT sit around on your hands waiting for her to not be confused.
You two broke up for a reason, maybe what cause the break hasn't been resolved or can't be resolved. Maybe she just wants to be single for a while.
... (read in full...)
I'm in a high-risk pregnancy and he wants me to start earning?
Q. I have been married for 2 years,I had thought happily. After we got married, my contract terminated for my job. All very stressful but we started trying for a baby straight away. Well the upshot is that all was okay with me but there were male ...
A. 4 September 2014: Well, honestly I'd walk away. This is ridiculous. My question is this though, can't you get any kind of financial aid, unemployment, something? to just help a little with the money?
I don't think he understand how incredibly stressful a late pre... (read in full...)
He didn't reply to my messages -- should I leave it?
Q. Hi. On Sunday I was talking to a guy on Grindr, we were really getting on well, albeit for the short time we were talking, and he definitely my type, and its nice to speak to a guy my own age on there. After a while he went offline, and stayed that ...
A. 4 September 2014: Don't EVER apologize THAT much when trying to get a guy to talk to you! Seriously!! YOU have NOTHING to apologize for. You two got on well chatting, and you wanted to see if he wants to continue and met up. NO NEED to apologize :) OK? Please? It ... (read in full...)
Why is his friend's ex so perfect to him?
Q. love my boyfriend .All i wish is his happiness but i wonder if he is happy with me.He tells me that he love me and he also does everything for my happiness but whenever we fight why he compare me with his friend's ex.He told me that she is ...
A. 4 September 2014: It can be twofold , either it is him using MANIPULATION. He is trying to get you jealous and trying to make you FEEL like you have to compete with this girl.
OR
It could be his way of telling you that he wants you to "give" something in ret... (read in full...)
Is this normal in a relationship?
Q. Hi, this is not really a personal question but I'd like to hear some opinions. It is regarding the recent celebrity nude pictures scandal. After seeing the pics I find myself questioning what is normal and acceptable in relationships(I've never had ...
A. 4 September 2014: EVERYONE have their own kinks.
MANY women do NOT like getting a "semen facial", but some do. Some women like to get spanked or spank their husband/BF/lover, some likes anal, some don't, Some swallows, some spit, some like it "vanilla" and some lik... (read in full...)
She wrote me this letter about her marriage. Should I forget about her and find someone who is single?
Q. This may be long enough but i'll try to keep it short and simple. I liked her from school. Never talked to her i was a shyguy. After college we meet on facebook. We started talking. Even she had feelings for me since school. The point now is that ...
A. 4 September 2014: I think she is looking for a "knight in shining armor" to take her away from a life she no longer wants.
Culturally, I will presume that her asking for a divorce is MUCH harder for her then it would be for most Western women, so I can see why she ... (read in full...)
Fighting for control "mother in law".
Q. My husband and I have been married to 4 years with 3 kids and we've been together for 10 years. We live together before we got married 5 years before we got married and his mom was a control freak. Whenever we go visit her she will complain about me ...
A. 4 September 2014: This is such a common issue, and a sad one too.
YOU and your husband really need to talk this out. Find out what you NEED from him, and how to deal with the MIL/sister as a united front.
1. I would talk to your husband and explain that you... (read in full...)
I hate my husband and in laws!
Q. Hi, I'm new here and hoping to get some advice. I am married for 1.5 years now and have a 2 month old son who I absolutely love and adore. However, I feel like I have started to hate my husband. He completely changed after we got married and star...
A. 4 September 2014: So you are at a crossroads, do you want to find a way to work this out or do you want to toss in the towel?
I think you are BOTH expecting the other to accommodate them. YOU want him to NOT listen to his family and you want him to accept that you... (read in full...)
He bullied me into an abortion last time, so how do I tell him I'm pregnant?
Q. Can anyone help!! I think i just need someone to talk to and not judge! I have been with my on off partner for 3 years. At the minute u could say we have been casual...just dating. Last year I fell pregnant and he bullied and manipulated me over th ...
A. 4 September 2014: Can I ask why you guys didn't use BOTH condom and the pill to make AS sure as possible to not get pregnant? Specially HIM, since HE so adamantly didn't/don't want a child. If he is SO against having children he should either NOT have sex (seriously) ... (read in full...)
Has he moved someone else in?
Q. Sorry it's so long-I'm very bad at saying things in a quick way lol I have (or had until the other day lol) a boyfriend who lives in a city about 30 miles away from me.He's on a low income with children to support so I didn't expect him to fi...
A. 4 September 2014: If he had the KIDS staying he could just have told you that. Not the whole - renting out to students, then renting out to teachers.... He LIES because he doesn't WANT you to know, because he KNOWS how you would react to the truth.
I think YOU know... (read in full...)
I don't like my best friends boyfriend at all but I don't know how to tell her I don't like him!
Q. Alright so I don't like my best friends boyfriend at all!! She started dating him about 8 months ago and all he can do is get on my nerves! So he is currently in the army and my friend is head over heels for him...she loves him. So to the reasons ...
A. 4 September 2014: Growing up I had a REALLY good friend (one of the few girls I were friends with) and when we hit 16 she started dating an "older" guy (I think he was 21). And he was a total asshat. Controlling with everything from her hair, to what music, movies, ... (read in full...)
Does no sex after pregnancy mean no orgasms either?
Q. Hey i was wondering is it safe to have a orgasm through clitoral stimulation after having a baby almost a month ago? I know your not supposed to have sex until 6 weeks after but i don't know if an orgasm this way is safe, i keep hearing different ...
A. 4 September 2014: Yep, you should be JUSt fine with clitoral stimulation.
The reason they suggest no sex for 6 weeks is for your vagina to heal, I mean it was just stretches out to fit a BABY though and NOT messing with it (aka sex) can help it "spring back fas... (read in full...)
How odd is it that her pets are "brothers"?
Q. I've known this girl Aimée for about 3 months. Met her at work and she's really nice, seems genuine, she's not judgemental or anything like that. She seems like she'd be a good friend. Here's the catch though, we were talking about our families and ...
A. 4 September 2014: I think it's HER sense of humor and "love" for her pets. I don't think it's mental illness.
Now if she TALKED about them constantly like THEY really were brothers it would be another matter. I DO agree it's a little odd, but I think it's just who... (read in full...)
Re-precautions of being a Turkish husband wanting to divorce wife with one child?
Q. Please anyone out there who could answer this question. What would be the reason as why a man with a child who claims to be separated from his wife, still wants to stay married to his estranged wife? He is of Turkish background. His excuse is ...
A. 4 September 2014: I would think if there are any "repercussions" it would be (for him) financially and socially (for the wife).
Separated means... still married.
So if you are looking for a future with this guy, I doubt he will ever divorce her. That way he does... (read in full...)
He tells me he's looking for a divorce, but ...
Q. Hi I've been seeing my ex boyfriend behind his wife's back for almost a year now. I was very much in love with him at one time. He dumped me and got married. We were together 13 years. He comes to my home and is very comfortable. He told me he was ...
A. 4 September 2014: I think you know, and not even deep down, that this guy is a tool and he is USING you because he is bored in his marriage and is too lazy to WORK on their issues.
He ISN'T going to divorce his wife for you. He isn't really wanting to divorce ... (read in full...)
Is my new love interest playing games?
Q. I met a new girlfriend about a year ago. She is coming out of a bad marriage. She went through a bad time including financially during which I was supportive, but lately she has re-established her career and is doing well. During this time ...
A. 3 September 2014: I don't think she is playing games, I think she doesn't know WHAT the HAY she wants. Which is why she is blowing hot and cold.
My guess is, she IS NOT ready for a new relationship and she has sensed that you have changed from being a friend t... (read in full...)
Should I warn my assistant that the man she's chatty with almost had an affair with me and is married? Or is it best for me to stay away and let this happen?
Q. A while ago I got chatting to a guy I work with and we got close very quickly. We both had a crush on each other and both wanted more, well I did anyway. He made me send him photos, chatted about sex a lot and I did really like him. He knew I liked ...
A. 3 September 2014: I'd ask him (in front of her) How is your baby and your GF doing? That way you tell her, without telling her.
If she can't take that hint, she is denser than concrete.
Since he has "naughty" pics of you I'd be careful with getting into too... (read in full...)
His first weekend out in America and my B/f got a lapdance and kissed a stripper! The trust is completely gone.
Q. My bf and I have been together for 3yrs. He is younger than me. He had the opportunity to go to Florida to study for a year, which I have supported and encouraged. I was, however, aware of all the temptations that would be there in Miami etc for...
A. 3 September 2014: I agree wholeheartedly with YouWish.
This is his WAY of "asserting" his freedom and maybe even a little "dominance" in the relationship, by doing something he KNEW were off limits, that he HAD agreed to NOT doing. He thinks because YOU love him... (read in full...)
Is she playing games?
Q. A young woman hired me to look at problems in her home and while I was out to fix them she was nice and even flirty, I thought this girl may even have a thing for me but out of the blue she went to my manager who insisted to come out with me on ...
A. 3 September 2014: My guess? Yes, she is playing games.
Maybe you didn't "play" her game the "right" way (Goodness only know WHAT she expected). Or maybe she can't tell the difference between flirting and just being nice (as in, saying hello on the street).... (read in full...)
Whenever I make a move she reminds me we're friends
Q. So ive met this girl little over a year ago however we've only really gotten close these past 4 or 5 months. This girl is the best friend ive ever had, we always take each others advice on relationships and we can trust each other with anything. I ...
A. 3 September 2014: If she KEEPS reminding you that the two of you are friend, then THAT is all you are. FRIENDS. And you have to respect that.
If you can't be friend WITH her due to your feelings then walk away, don't keep trying to CRAM something down her throat b... (read in full...)
Can someone help me save my relationship?
Q. Ok, so I've been with this guy for the past year, he's everything I've wanted in a man and the one I want to spend my life with, at least that's what I thought. I lost my virginity to him and have lived with him off and on since we got together. We ...
A. 3 September 2014: How do you save it?
YOU realize that these issues are YOURS, for YOU to work on. He can't fix your insecurities and he shouldn't in the sense that, YOU need to REST within yourself.
It's not his JOB to constantly make sure you don't freak out ... (read in full...)
Please advice me on how to make the separation and divorce as painless as possible for my son
Q. Hello aunts and uncles. Ive been married for 5 years. My husband cheated on me. He doesnt know why. To be honest Internet dont wanna hear it either. Maybe life was too perfect and he got bored. His own fault. He sleeps in the guest room until I can ...
A. 3 September 2014: Have him served with the separation papers/divorce papers and he hopefully will take the hint.
And as I started before, if you don't WANT to try and work it out, I can't see why you should FEEL like you have to.
YOU have to do what feels right... (read in full...)
My Husband Reads Erotic literature
Q. I just happened to see my husband's browsing history while searching for a file . He seems to be reading erotic stories involving incest between mother and son .. This is the second time I ve seen him read this topic of erotic literature .. The ...
A. 3 September 2014: It's fantasy. And maybe this is one of his favorite taboos, not because he wants to have sex with his mother, but because it's "forbidden", "wrong", "naughty" - apparently, incest ranks pretty high on the erotica list, as in it's highly popular. ... (read in full...)
Why Did This Lady Act This Way?
Q. i moved area's a year ago and while here i met a lady who owns the local shop; she seemed really friendly and after some talks i invited her out for dinner one day to get to know her more as i didnt have any friends and thought to make a ...
A. 2 September 2014: Why ignore her? If you run into her, talk to her or just say hi. If you WANT to get to know her, MAKE the first move?
... (read in full...)
I had an affair with a younger man and I wanted to hurt his girlfriend so I told her about what we did. I thought this would break them but they're back together. What do I do now?
Q. I've been very stupid. 6 weeks ago I started to talk to a man 11 years younger than myself, he was at work when I met him and I asked for his number for a job that I needed doing in my home. I text him and it started off innocently, I ne...
A. 2 September 2014: I hope Karma will ride you hard.
Don't you understand what you are doing is wrong on SO many levels?
WHAt has the GF EVER done to you? (other then, according to you, be in YOUR way?)
Can you HEAR yourself? Have you the slightest notion of ... (read in full...)
I'm irritated that this girl who is pretty vile personality wise and isn't even that attractive seems to have my crush attracted to her
Q. I feel pretty stupid writing to an agony aunt site but i feel like i have nobody i can talk to about how i'm feeling. There's a guy at work who i have a sort of "crush" on. I've been talk that he likes me, although he's never said it to me. Appare...
A. 2 September 2014: Could be that she is more "accessible" and BED-able then you are. If the guy thinks you are a decent girl he might not pursue you, if he is JUST looking for sex. He KNOWS the other girl might be a LOT more willing to put out and NOT have ... (read in full...)
Why Did This Lady Act This Way?
Q. i moved area's a year ago and while here i met a lady who owns the local shop; she seemed really friendly and after some talks i invited her out for dinner one day to get to know her more as i didnt have any friends and thought to make a ...
A. 2 September 2014: Maybe she thought you weren't really interested? As you never followed up or contacted her?
That would kind of make sense to me. Specially if she has a lot of business ventures that keeps her busy maybe making new friends who seems a little r... (read in full...)
Has he moved someone else in?
Q. Sorry it's so long-I'm very bad at saying things in a quick way lol I have (or had until the other day lol) a boyfriend who lives in a city about 30 miles away from me.He's on a low income with children to support so I didn't expect him to fi...
A. 2 September 2014: He is so full of crap his eyes must be very brown indeed...
Honey, you have spend 3 years with this man, and you were still living apart having your own lives, except from when YOU went (mainly) to see him.
Whenever you ask him something his FI... (read in full...)
Please advice me on how to make the separation and divorce as painless as possible for my son
Q. Hello aunts and uncles. Ive been married for 5 years. My husband cheated on me. He doesnt know why. To be honest Internet dont wanna hear it either. Maybe life was too perfect and he got bored. His own fault. He sleeps in the guest room until I can ...
A. 1 September 2014: I don't think there is ANYTHING wrong in not being able to forgive this or wanting to forgive it.
If he can't even tell you why (I don't believe when someone says I don't know why I did it, it just happened, because we ALL know - sex doesn't ... (read in full...)
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