5 year relationship ending because of us being jealous and controlling
Q. MOD NOTE: 2 questions put into one Hello there, Yesterday my bf of 5 years told me on the phone he does not know what to do, he thinks to end the relationship is best for both of us because we will have more arguments. I cried on the phone and he...
A. 25 August 2014: Do YOU think this is good or bad? Only YOU can answer that.
Maybe he texted because of the FB thing you pulled. He knows you are not a happy camper and even if he doesn't want to DATE you he might still CARE about you.
The thing is though ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is still close to his ex girlfriend's family. Should I be worried?
Q. My partner of 3 years still spends a lot of time with his ex-girlfriends mother-in-law, calls her mum and generally spends time with the family. He's kept this from me a few times when he wanted to spend time with them rather than my family. He's ...
A. 25 August 2014: I think it comes down to HOW often he sees them. If it's NOT that often, I would regard them as "his" friends and let it be.
My first BF still occasionally visit my parents (well my Dad now, since my Mom passed away) and we broke up over 20 years... (read in full...)
I regret letting the moment pass ......
Q. Hi Guys I like a girl at work. She is one of the girls there who is very pretty and most guys try to flirt with her. I however don't do that much cause I am much senior to her (11 years) but there is always teasing and some tension between us. Last...
A. 25 August 2014: I think you did the right thing in NOT letting it go further. Because THAT is how a gentleman behaves, he doesn't take advantage of a drunk younger co-worker.
And I agree with Cerberus & WiseOwlE. I rarely think it's a good idea to date co-worke... (read in full...)
I am constantly being used by guys!
Q. Hi there, For some reason, I'm constantly being used by guys. It all started when my boyfriend had slept with me then cheated on me with another girl. Ever since then, I've had no self confidence and doubt myself a lot. I thought it was time for...
A. 25 August 2014: CMMP is right.
The first BF was an idiot. He cheated on you because he is a selfish asshole. HE didn't cheat on YOU because there is "something" wrong with you.
The second guy you're dating is a LDR. So when you two met up ALL he wants is sex.... (read in full...)
I feel I deserve more attention from my married co worker.
Q. Hi all, I cannot bear it anymore.. it has become obsessed and so engrossed.. i found one of my new comer office girl sad.. i did my best to make her happy and talking. i was patiently listening and made her talk and entertained her in various ways....
A. 25 August 2014:
You were nice to her when she first started working and now you want her to "pay back" for being nice? Am I understanding you right?
She OWES you nothing.
Maybe she DOESN'T WANT to be your "work" friend any more. And what do you do then?... (read in full...)
Should I let my former best friend back into my life?
Q. I met a girl at college and we instantly became really close. She was the same age as me, and we just got on really well. She has four children and from what she told me, an abusive partner. I helped her as much as I could, but I was beginning to ...
A. 25 August 2014: Honestly, WHAT would you get out of this friendship? Do you want to try again because you think she has changed, or because you feel sorry for her?
Funny enough, her FIRST contact to you in a long time is HER asking YOU for a favor. That isn't ab... (read in full...)
I think he blocked me but I'm unsure why! Should I try to find out?
Q. So aunts and uncles, I asked a question a few weeks ago about a guy I talk to in New Jersey, whom I planned on pursuing when I got up there. He's my best friends brother, and we've hung out and what not when he comes down here to visit family.. ...
A. 25 August 2014: I agree with highmaintainance101
He is JUST not interested.
A guy who blocks you, has no interest to know you further. You can ask his why, but that will make you come across as dense more than desperate.
I mean, seriously, if YOU decide... (read in full...)
He proposed, but every weekend is taken up with his children ... what if I want a child too?
Q. Hi. My bofriend proposed 2 months ago. As he has 2 kids with ex, he spent Saturdays taking them out somewher, dropped them back at their mom's because she doesn't like them sleeping out and on Sunday took them to visit their grandmother from about ...
A. 25 August 2014: From your post it is hard to figure out IF you are part in these week-end trips with the kids. IF you are NOT part of the spending the weekend, but expected to "entertain" yourself EVERY week-end, I think he is being unfair to you.
If you are supp... (read in full...)
I cant stand my boyfriend's family and things with my boyfriend are starting to fall apart as well. What do I do?
Q. Iv been with my boyfriend for about 2 years now, engaged for a year. I agree that I rushed into this relationship and I have nothing to say in my defense. I had known him for many years because we worked in the same place and he seemed great. ...
A. 25 August 2014: Are you asking permission to dump a man you do not love?
I agree I don't get this pot either.
You feel like you are settling for a man who is beneath you and you are unsure what to do?
DUMP him, end it. Ask him to move out (if he is livin... (read in full...)
What signs should I look out for when men flirt or are interested?
Q. Having trouble 'reading men's signals' recently... Recently I have 'noticed' a couple of attractive men that I have come to know. When I speak to them there is always a 'nervous' discussion or an inability to look the other in the eye for too long...
A. 25 August 2014: Lots of people have NO problem being AMAZING when you aren't face to face. Once you are face to face, it IS a bit different.
I would honestly spend more time face-to-face with him, because otherwise you will build him up to be this "super-g... (read in full...)
.I don't understand why I should be faithful and invest in a relationship that has unstable future plans
Q. I have been dating this man for a year and a half and I need a solution to a problem. We are in a long distance relationship an hour and a half drive away.I live in a big city and he lives in a small town. I am willing to relocate to another big ...
A. 25 August 2014: I agree with CMMP
Being faithful and investing in a relationship makes sense to most people. If you down the line have to re-think the relationship, so be it, but being unfaithful? HOW is that going to help you achieve your goals of a family? ... (read in full...)
Does my longtime friend suddenly want an affair with me?
Q. A former female co worker and I have remained friends after she quit her job. She's married I'm divorced. I have been invited to their house a few times over the years and her husband is a nice guy. When I meet this woman for lunch it's been nothing ...
A. 24 August 2014:
If she kisses you in a way you don't want to be kissed then turn your head and offer a cheek, or TELL her. I'm not comfortable with you kissing me like that. YOU are a GROWN man. IN YOUR 50's. Don't tell me you can not set her straight.
She... (read in full...)
My girlfriend and I are not speaking .... AGAIN!
Q. Well my girlfriend and I arn't speaking again. She literally makes me feel nuts with how double standard she is. We were talking about how you can fall in love with two people, she claims she would be okay if I cheated on her and fell for someone...
A. 24 August 2014: It sounds like an absolutely horrid and unhealthy relationship. Why does she have all the power? Why haven't you just walked away? I mean WHAT do you gt out of this relationship? Other than being bullies, used and abused?
My advice change all your... (read in full...)
Does him finding ME attractive mean he doesn't find his wife attractive?
Q. I wanted to know if I have done the right thing or was there a chance that he was sort of serious about that me? There was a mutual crush between us, however we are both committed. His wife works in the same place as he does so do I, however, t...
A. 24 August 2014: So he cheated on HIs wife and you cheated on YOUR partner... What a mess.
How about you FOCUS on your marriage/relationship instead of mucking about with a married man?
My guess is the wife is BUSY with taking care of the child and work and hav... (read in full...)
Everything was going good until he suddenly cut me off1
Q. I have hung out with a guy for the past month. Honestly, i had messaged because i felt that i would be able to get a kiss out of him. we hung out, and he did kiss me. Later that night i admitted to him that i didn't like him. i had told him before ...
A. 24 August 2014: Because he wanted sex, not a GF and he was smart enough to figure out if he HAD sex with you, you would want a relationship.
And, he just isn't into you at all.
Instead of being so adamant about "not liking" a guy when you first met, how a... (read in full...)
Am I now the workplace joke?
Q. Im the 3rd oldest at work, 95% my colleagues are under 31. my handwriting isnt good , I try and its kind of ok and legible, but it will never be "really neat." Part of my job means writing and documenting at times, I do my best but since i was ...
A. 23 August 2014: I agree with Cindy. So what? Your handwriting isn't the neatest and you know it... Why take that so personal? It has NOTHING to do with your age. It has to do with what people see, "bad" handwriting. I'm a lefty, and over the years I have learned ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend hasn't told his family about us... is he ashamed of me?
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for about a year. All my close friends and family members know about him. Heck, he has even talked to my mother! I talk about him all the time, I'm proud to be with him and am serious about our relationship. However, ...
A. 23 August 2014: I think you should talk to him about it. I think you should tell him HOW it makes you feel and think. It could be he is embarrassed of his family, not you. IF you are COMPLETELY wrong he will do what's right.
A year is a LONG time to date and not ... (read in full...)
How do I get my boyfriend to communicate about the problems that we're having?
Q. Well, for the past few years now I've been having a slight problem with my boyfriend, he refuses to talk about our problems, he's a generally talkative guy and will pretty much have a conversation about anything so it's not his lack of talking ...
A. 23 August 2014: This is not a "slight" problem for you at all. A partner being unwilling to communicate means there is a breakdown in the relationship, or a "hole". This "hole" will only get bigger and deeper.
He doesn't care how his actions affect you. He doesn... (read in full...)
5 year relationship ending because of us being jealous and controlling
Q. MOD NOTE: 2 questions put into one Hello there, Yesterday my bf of 5 years told me on the phone he does not know what to do, he thinks to end the relationship is best for both of us because we will have more arguments. I cried on the phone and he...
A. 23 August 2014: I get that. 5 years is a long time, but... would you rather he leave you after 6? or after an engagement or marriage?
Take whatever good and/or bad from those 5 years and take them as experience that will help you in the future. Don't look at ... (read in full...)
What's up with these mixed signals?
Q. Hi. I recently moved in a new house.me and my boyfriend have broken up recently.Few weeks after I noticed that one of the guys I leave with started flirting with me and recently asked me to watch a movie with him at his room. We made out and it was ...
A. 23 August 2014: Yep, to everything WiseOwlE wrote.
And consider dating/sleeping with a roommate isn't always a very bright idea.
... (read in full...)
5 year relationship ending because of us being jealous and controlling
Q. MOD NOTE: 2 questions put into one Hello there, Yesterday my bf of 5 years told me on the phone he does not know what to do, he thinks to end the relationship is best for both of us because we will have more arguments. I cried on the phone and he...
A. 23 August 2014: I think he has come to the end of his rope and you refuse to accept it.
CRYING doesn't fix anything. You USE it to get what you want I suspect.
He WANTS to be single, so why FORCE a relationship that isn't working down his throat?
Do y... (read in full...)
Is it possible to love your husband but contemplate leaving him?
Q. I have been married to my husband for 12 years. We have 2 beautiful children together. Since we got married, our marriage was always been a little tumultuous as my husband tends to be very moody and suffers from anxiety. He has refused professi...
A. 23 August 2014: If you are NOt ready to leave him, which I totally get. I would still urge you to find a counselor for YOU. In how to deal with this better.
You have given your husband ALL the power in your marriage and he knows it.
If you belong to a chur... (read in full...)
Ex boyfriend sends me a friend request on Facebook after four years of not talking?
Q. Ok I have not spoken to my ex boyfriend in almost four years mainly because we had an ugly break up and he was kind of an asshole towards me after we broke up (rubbing his new gf in my face, calling me names) . It was to the point I couldn't take it ...
A. 23 August 2014: Only way to find out is to ask him.. IF you actually CARE what he thinks and why he s doing what he is doing.
Personally, given your history, I'd ignore the request and keep him out of your life.
... (read in full...)
Am I over reacting about my boyfriend still having his ex wifes toothbrush and finding her herpes meds ?
Q. My Boyfriend keeps his ex wifes tooth brush and toiletries . Is this normal ????? We have been dating 4 months and he has been divorced for 3 years I have been staying over and he asked me to keep some stuff at his place and it is driving me nuts ...
A. 22 August 2014: Yes, DO get yourself tested.
As for him holding on to all her stuff, that IS NOT normal. Maybe if he had been widowed I could sorta understand having her stuff around, but they divorced.
The fact that you felt you HAD to tell him to get rid o... (read in full...)
Is it pathetic of me to have fallen for a girl I met on vacation?
Q. I've just come back from a holiday and I'm really depressed.im not bothered about coming home, but I met a girl there called Beth, she was absolutely stunning, she had a younger brother and sister and she was so good with them, adorably cute with ...
A. 22 August 2014: It's called a crush. And it doesn't make you pathetic. It makes you human.
We met MANY people in life we find attractive and/or find ourselves attracted to, some we will never get to know, others we do.
Learn from this little experience. IF y... (read in full...)
We want a boy but I don't want my husband to be disappointed if it isn't
Q. Hello! I am 12 weeks pregnant, due in March 2015! My husband wants, a little boy, therefore I do to. I even talk to my stomach as if I were having a boy. But lately I have had a lot of anxiety inside me. I am so worried that, I will have a girl, I ...
A. 22 August 2014: I wanted a son, I got 3 daughters :) They were healthy and happy, so the gender meant very little to me (and my husband) once they were there.
Relax and ACCEPT that you actually have NO say in the gender of your child. LOVE the child because ... (read in full...)
She told him she used to have a crush on him?
Q. Should i be worried that my girlfriend (and mother of my child) told her guy friend on Facebook that she used to have a crush on him in high school? Not sure why she would choose now of all times to admit that to him, but nevertheless its got me ...
A. 21 August 2014: Eh, she USED to have a crush in HIGH-SCHOOL. If she is on her 30's this was over 20 years ago. It's a FOND memory at best. Something to laugh or reminisces about. No more.
If it was something she didn't want anyone to know, she wouldn't have tol... (read in full...)
How can I feel better? I was led on for a year and a half.
Q. Dear cupid i loved my crush for 1.5 yrs now.. he too lead me on.. one day he told me he has a gilfriend. i have no idea why i was so dumb. he did not have any such details on his facebook. he did not even have any close friends pics or anything...
A. 21 August 2014: So you two had a lot of conversation through Facebook or did you spend time in person too?
You said he was your crush and that he talked romantic things with you that lead you to believe you two shared more than a online "something".
What yo... (read in full...)
Need help breaking up with girlfriend!
Q. I'm dating a girl, and I just don't know how to break up with her. She is nice and sweet, but I don't want to break her heart. If possible I want to remain her friend. Remember we are both girls here. Now the reason I want to break up with her...
A. 20 August 2014: Call her and talk to her.
Don't jump from person to person though. And never start dating a person before you have PROPERLY ended it with the current one.
If you can't END a relationship, do you think you are actually mature enough to BE in ... (read in full...)
My friend is trying to set me up in a LDR but I don't want to!
Q. So my friend is trying to set me up in a long distance relationship. The problem is that im not ready for a relationship and especially not long distance. Im 14. He is really really eager about it and I really do appreciate the effort and the ...
A. 20 August 2014: Just tell him you aren't looking for a GF at the moment. That you appreciate his efforts, but no thanks. YOU do not OWE him any long and emotional explanations. YOU didn't ASK him to do this for you. THAT was HIS choice. So tell him thanks, but no ... (read in full...)
Neither of us is ready for parenting, so why do I keep thinking about having his child?
Q. Before I begin, I would really love it if nobody judged me or made fun of me. Because I know my feelings are wrong but I just want to know what is making me feel this way. I'm 17 and my boyfriend is 21. We've been dating for almost 8 months ...
A. 20 August 2014: Is it normal? For some, I think it is.
For me it wasn't. I didn't want kids till I met my husband at 27.
Be smart about this. KIDS are a HUGE responsibility and drain. Emotionally, physically and financially.
There will be PLENTY of time f... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is mad with me and thinks I'm cheating... for no reason!
Q. Hi everyone xx Right,so my boyfriend of a year has been going through a very rough patch and i helped him find a new place to stay and i tried to support him in every way i could... Before the wekeend, he wanted to see me but i couldn't due to ...
A. 20 August 2014: It's not you. And NOTHING you did.
We had another poster ask a VERY similar question the day before yesterday, and I'm going to give you the same answer.
1. He cheated on you, and in order to keep you in the DEFENSIVE and not pay attention to... (read in full...)
He said he would help, we had sex, and now, no help!
Q. A fee days ago I asked my ex boyfriend if I could borrow some money from him to invest in my business. He is a millionare so I knew he could spare it. We broke up 2 years ago and we hadn't spoken in 5 months since the last time we met up- mainly ...
A. 20 August 2014: And he is now ignoring you ?
If so, move on.. Find another investor. And don't let him rope you into to bed again.
Now, you know him better then any of us, is this something that seems out of character for him? Or did he flake from time to tim... (read in full...)
My boyfriend dumped me by disappearing, should I give him a piece of my mind or just leave him alone?
Q. I was dating my boyfriend for about 5 months (not long). I'm 18 and he's 22. He hasn't spoken to me in a week now. I've been very worried that something happened to him (that he was in the hospital or maybe even dead) so I've been texting and...
A. 20 August 2014: Does he know where you live? work? If the answer is yes and yes...
Then honestly, the best thing you can do is BLOCK his number. And accept that THIS is who he is. A WUSSY! who can't even break up with you.
If there is NO WAY he could have lo... (read in full...)
He said he would help, we had sex, and now, no help!
Q. A fee days ago I asked my ex boyfriend if I could borrow some money from him to invest in my business. He is a millionare so I knew he could spare it. We broke up 2 years ago and we hadn't spoken in 5 months since the last time we met up- mainly ...
A. 20 August 2014: Um, you are a GROWN woman, why not just pick up the phone and call him?
... (read in full...)
I'm not going to contact him but is there any chance he might contact me and we could salvage something?
Q. Dear cupid, I am needing your advice on this please, My ex dumped me and Things ended very friendly between us, he just didn’t want a relationship and I do – I’m heartbroken, all I can do is work and sleep. Anyway he contacts and we chat...
A. 20 August 2014: I think If he really doesn't WANT a relationship he "might" try and get you to accept a FWB (which from what I can gleen of your post, is NOT what you want).
My advice, give yourself some time to "get over" him and move on.
Go out with friends... (read in full...)
Worried that stretch marks are going to ruin my body, even after I've dropped 3 stone. Advice?
Q. This is quite a common problem and I need some advice on it. I am a young teen girl verging on being 18, and some of you may of read from my previous questions that I am trying to lose weight. Its going very well I have gone fro...
A. 20 August 2014: Don't forget they will not go away. They can however look a lot lighter with the bio-oil.
they are in essence like scars.... (read in full...)
My fiance accuses me of cheating.
Q. My fiance of four year has accused me of sleeping around. I have given him my undivided attention within the 4 years we have been together. He suffers from depression and iv been there always through his ups and downs. I cannot exept theses ...
A. 19 August 2014: Both Cerberus and Wise gave good advice.
If this is out of the blue accusations, I think it's very possible that he could be cheating himself or that he is looking for a way out. And maybe he finds it easier to break the engagement if he thinks y... (read in full...)
Experiences with losing your virginity in a one night stand or to a FWB??
Q. So recently I was asked by a friend I have know since I was five if I wanted to have sex with him in a fwb kinda thing. My problem with this is that I am virgin. I'm just wondering what are some experiences anybody has had with losing their ...
A. 19 August 2014: I will echo the rest o the uncles and aunties.
Don't "sell" yourself so short. If your "friend" thinks you are "good" enough to bang but no more than honestly HE isn't good enough for your FIRST time.
You may think it's not a big deal now. Bu... (read in full...)
They say your first kiss is your best, how do I get over the fact that I'm not my boyfriend's first?
Q. This is driving me insane....can anyone help please? So me and my bf are in love but recently I've been getting really insecure about his past especially the fact that I wasn't his first kiss but he was mine. It never bothered me before but I accide...
A. 18 August 2014: You Wish explained it perfectly.
My "first" kiss was wet and sloppy... He might as well have been a Saint Bernard... It certainly wasn't the best.
Don't overthink this. Just have at it. Start out slow and then let him lead you or you lead him.... (read in full...)
Worried that stretch marks are going to ruin my body, even after I've dropped 3 stone. Advice?
Q. This is quite a common problem and I need some advice on it. I am a young teen girl verging on being 18, and some of you may of read from my previous questions that I am trying to lose weight. Its going very well I have gone fro...
A. 18 August 2014: Bio oil or/and Palmer's Cocoa Butter Formula Tummy Butter are really good for stretch marks.... (read in full...)
I think my friend stole from me ......
Q. I think my friend may have stolen from me and I feel awful thinking like this so I need some advice... A mutual friend of ours was getting married and we were both invited to the wedding. Unfortunately I wasn't able to attend as I was going o...
A. 18 August 2014: I agree with Cindy (as usual)
This is NOT a friend. A friend would have called you the MOMENT she found out she lost the envelope, she would have offered to replace the voucher and she WOULD have replaced it.
Your "friend" "acted" sorry by... (read in full...)
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