Why did he suddenly brush me off?
Q. A question mostly to men: Why would a man show interest in a woman only to complete ignore her all of a sudden and not even look at her or say hi when he sees her, when the last time he saw her he insinuated otherwise? He does know I am in a r...
A. 17 October 2014: Eh if your intentions were PURELY platonic, and he is ignoring you... I'd chalk this one up to "not friend material".
Let it go. He can CHOOSE who he wants to be friends with and whom he doesn't. Maybe.. he just had a bad day and wasn't in the m... (read in full...)
Was a wrong to contact a women to see if her baby was my boyfriends ?
Q. I recently found out that a few months before my boyfriend met me he had an affair with a married women . I found old text messages he still had on his iPhone with nude pics they sent each other. he admitted he slept with her but didn't know she was ...
A. 17 October 2014: Then ending it with him is in your favor. If your WHOLE family think he is scum, maybe they are just looking out for you? And maybe they aren't all wrong?
If he was looking for sex on CL *shudder* he is kinda of a he-whore... skank-man.. YOU can ... (read in full...)
What do I do about my nitpicking fiance?
Q. I moved in with my fiancé. I am finding out that he is a nitpicker. He tells me how to cook or what I should do with this or that recipe. He was the first one to ever complain about a recipe that I have cooked for years and years that everyon...
A. 17 October 2014: I'm OCD - I think my things JUST so, but I do NOT allow other to mess with my "stuff" NOR would I go about telling others how to do thing they OBVIOUSLY know how to do.
With the cooking, tell your BF/Fiance to cook it himself if he isn't happy. T... (read in full...)
He says he doesn't want sex with me because he's bored!
Q. I'm 21 and my boyfriend is 22, we used to have sex like 6-8,times a month which I was fine with but now he doesn't want to do it at all because he says he's bored. And it really hurt a lot. Shouldn't we be doing it a lot more since we are ...
A. 17 October 2014: So is he bored with having sex with YOU or just with sex in general?
If it's the first, I say end it and find someone who WANTS you in every way, including sexually.
Though at age 22 6-8 times a months seems little at least compared to how ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to think that the way he wants to share expenses and chores is unreasonable?
Q. I am with my boyfriend a little over a year, and I moved into his appartment about a month ago., I am writing it to hear some opinions if I am mistaken on having these thoughts, but the whole situation started bothering me from the very beginnin...
A. 17 October 2014: Sorry, I would move back out and find a roommate and a cheaper living situation.
Yes, I DO think that when two people live together as a couple they SHARE the costs. But that means down the board or one pays rent the other utilities.
However... (read in full...)
Reference letter I requested from former boss in now not needed. How do I approach this?
Q. Hi there I don't know if anyone can help me but I need some advice. About a year ago I was at my dream job, I was there for about 6 months. I had to leave because my contract only allowed for 6 months but I made good friends and produced som...
A. 17 October 2014: He could send YOU a paper version of the recommendation for later use, I mean YOU might need it for another job?
Was he supposed to send the company you were applying to the recommendation or to you? IF the first... contact him and tell him tha... (read in full...)
Was a wrong to contact a women to see if her baby was my boyfriends ?
Q. I recently found out that a few months before my boyfriend met me he had an affair with a married women . I found old text messages he still had on his iPhone with nude pics they sent each other. he admitted he slept with her but didn't know she was ...
A. 17 October 2014: Wow, just wow.
I can't believe how MUCH you violated HIS and HER privacy, because you had a "hunch". If you felt his actions were so appalling, why not WALK away from this sordid mess instead of sticking your nose where (IF I MAY BE HONEST) ... (read in full...)
She never got rid of the explicit pictures of her ex! Do I just throw them away or confront her?
Q. I have a question. My wife and I are together 7 years married for 5. When we moved in together she had some pictures of an ex boyfriend. I was fine with some of them but there was 1 where they were kissing and a few of him in various states o...
A. 16 October 2014: Good for you in taking the common sense route and TALK to her. As it turns out you fears were unfounded, and that is good.
Always TRUST that you can TALK to your partner instead of trying to "read her mind" or second guess HER or yourself... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my daughter never having a family
Q. My daughter is 28, her boyfriend is 32. They both graduated long ago and both have masters in different fields. They both have VERY good jobs with VERY nice salaries. They both travelled the world. My daughter was on every continent, and more tha...
A. 16 October 2014: No matter the age of our children, we can't stop caring and we can't stop worrying.
I get that you CARE for her and want her to be happy. So I would just support her and watch her thrive with the life she chooses.
This day and age people have ... (read in full...)
Is it normal to be so indecisive when considering ending a relationship?
Q. Hello all. I'm in the process of trying decide whether I can be happy in my current relationship. When I think about ending things and not being together all I can think about is how amazing he is. When I think about staying in the relation...
A. 16 October 2014: I think it is. Even when we KNOW a relationship or friendship has run it's course it is hard to let go.
You want to cling on to the "good stuff" but when you do you are constantly reminded of the not so good too.
You BF can BE an amazing guy, ... (read in full...)
I feel like I have to do everything myself, or nag!
Q. I feel like I am the driving force behind just about everything in my relationship and it frustrates me. I have been with my partner for 6 years, we have two kids.. It often feels like my partner is like a third kid. Every little thing that needs ...
A. 16 October 2014: Well for one.. if what you're doing now (nagging and planning) isn't working for YOU -stop doing it! You are only annoying yourself and stressing yourself.
My husband (for whatever reason) have NOT been able to hit the hamper in the bedroom ... (read in full...)
LDR told me to get lost, then told my Mum she was pregnant
Q. I met a girl about a month ago when I was on vacation in Florida. We spent the last week together and I stayed at her place on the beach and we slept together a few times. She said I was the best guy she had ever met and she could see herself having ...
A. 16 October 2014: It's called Karma, son.
The girl who thought you were the BEST BF EVER!! figured out that you weren't such a hot potato after all, and now she wants you to suffer like she is suffering. Payton was young and naive and fell for your "cute British ... (read in full...)
I want to end our 3 year long LDR and get married but unsure If we should marry or end things?
Q. Hi, ive been with my long distance girlfriend for almost 3 years now and i think is time to close the distance. Its time to pop the question. However... We live in continents apart and we are citizens of diferent countries.we have a 13 years ag...
A. 16 October 2014: I know you might not want to hear this, but I think this 3 year fantasy is over.
You KNEW she didn't want to leave her life to marry you. You have had 3 YEARS to learn her language yet, you haven't even begun?
I think in your mind (and it wou... (read in full...)
We've broken up but my ex still supports me financially
Q. I am going through break up. It will be two weeks on Sat. Despite everything he and I have gone through, and the wrong I feel he does, I still very much care for him and would like it to work. We would have a lot to work on. He was complete...
A. 16 October 2014: What if.. he at the other end is saying the same thing? I don't want to be the first one to make a move? I want to keep my pride and dignity?
There is NO way of knowing if he is helping you out because he was RAISED to be a good man who KEEPS hi... (read in full...)
Why is he contacting me again?
Q. I met my ex on a dating site about a year ago....we dated for about 4 months and broke up at the beginning of this year because he kept doting over another woman and I became tired of hearing about her. Since then, I have seen him back on the same...
A. 16 October 2014: He had all these other kind of means to contact you, e-mail, phone/text and FB and he CHOSE the message system on the dating site? (OR he no longer has your phone number/e-mail) and he didn't THINK to use the FB.
My guess is, he WANTS you to have ... (read in full...)
We've broken up but my ex still supports me financially
Q. I am going through break up. It will be two weeks on Sat. Despite everything he and I have gone through, and the wrong I feel he does, I still very much care for him and would like it to work. We would have a lot to work on. He was complete...
A. 16 October 2014: Just remove yourself from HIS accounts? Pretty simple.
If you don't want him to feel he owes you anything then SHOW him.
And no, it doesn't necessarily means he wants to get back together, it means he feels RESPONSIBLE for you still. He is try... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant and the father of the child wants me to terminate. I'm confused
Q. I need sum help.. I don't need people judging me or giving me grief. I'm 25 and 9 weeks pregnant. I have been in an on/off relationship for some time. We were together for a few years and he cheated.. so I moved out and went no contact. 6 month...
A. 16 October 2014: If you can handle having the baby ALL on your own, I'd say consider keeping it/adopting it out - however - HE will ALWAYS be a part of your life if you keep it.
You really have 3 options:
1. Keep it (and raise it as a single mom, because you... (read in full...)
Should I tell my wife about the dream where I slept with another woman?
Q. I had a very explicit and elaborate dream in which I had sex with a woman who was not my wife. I would never dare tell my wife such things except that this particular dream wasn't sexual in nature. The sex part was just a small (but important) part ...
A. 16 October 2014: Sounds like a bad idea waiting to happen.... (read in full...)
Our friendship became troubled after he got a girlfriend. What should I do from here?
Q. More of a friendship problem. I had a really good friend, for about five years. Then he got a girlfriend (I have a long term boyfriend). Our friendship was always based on banter and being cheeky to each other. As soon as he gets a girlfriend, he ...
A. 16 October 2014: I'd let him go, to be honest. He isn't a very good friend if he thinks that he can be unkind whenever he has a GF. He could just have told you that when HE is dating someone he doesn't think the same banter is appropriate. If this is hi MO EVERY ... (read in full...)
My crush is asking for a threesome! Do I do it?
Q. My crush asked me to do a threesome, he has this fantasy. he said I could choose any friend /girl/ of mine to do it and make me feel more comfortable. I am interested in having something more with Him, I'm confused. I wouldn't want to do that if it ...
A. 16 October 2014: He doesn't WANT to date you, he wants to USE you for making HIs fantasy (3-some) come through and he is USING the knowledge that YOU have a crush on him to try and manipulate you into doing it.
If you think doing this will make him your BF, you ... (read in full...)
As an adult do you discuss your sex life with your parents?
Q. As adults, do you discuss any of the details of your sex life with either (or both) of your parents? Is it normal for a parent to want to know about your sex life? I am 23 years old. I recently started dating a new guy exclusively a few weeks ago,...
A. 16 October 2014: I didn't discussed my sex-life with my parents.I could however come to them with any and all questions. I just never did when it came to sex.
No, I don't think you have to give your mom details (sorry I kind of find that creepy and invasive... (read in full...)
I'm worried about my daughter never having a family
Q. My daughter is 28, her boyfriend is 32. They both graduated long ago and both have masters in different fields. They both have VERY good jobs with VERY nice salaries. They both travelled the world. My daughter was on every continent, and more tha...
A. 15 October 2014: As hard as it may be, this is HER life and HER choices. I don't blame them for not wanting to give up the life they have have. If it makes them happy and content, why change it?
Yes, biologically the next logical step would be children, but mayb... (read in full...)
Too embarassed to tell my BF. I really want a baby, but he say's financially we're not ready. What can I do?
Q. I just too feel too embarrassed to tell my partner how I feel. I really want a baby, and he has told me we are not ready financially even though he is ready emotionally. Twice now I have thought I was pregnant because of my stupid irregular periods. ...
A. 15 October 2014: I think the two of you are playing with fire. Using the pull out method as birth control is not very smart at all. Specially IF your BF feel you two aren't financially ready for a baby.
If your periods are so irregular have you considered being on... (read in full...)
Should I feel bad or guilty? Or is my friend over-reacting to my hook-up with a guy at the gym?
Q. Hello, so I have quite the dilemma here. I am a gay man in his early 20's. I just recently hooked up with a guy that a friend of mine was messing around with, which I didn't know. I met my friend a few months ago, and later found out that he...
A. 15 October 2014: Why should you feel bad? You friend called DIBS on the dude and you are supposed to magically know WHICH dude it was? YOU didn't do it intentionally. So stop beating yourself up.
And secondly, if the dude were having sex with HIM and you, he proba... (read in full...)
Did he just ''love me'' during his bad time? Should I be more distant with him?
Q. My boyfriend (we've been dating for about 5 months) was recently going through a tough time overseas and really only had me supporting him from across the ocean. During this time, he was very vocal about loving me and we spoke every single day. It...
A. 15 October 2014: It can be that he is not so focussed on the relationship at the moment. LDR can really go up and down, because so MUCH of conversations are left to interpretations and reading between the lines.
I wouldn't pull away, but maybe make the conversa... (read in full...)
My ex keeps on telling me how unhappy he is, yet he does nothing about it. How can I motivate him to do something about his unhappiness?
Q. I've been seeing my ex for about a year now. He is married after our breakup. Long story. Anyway he tells me how unhappy he is but still does nothing about it. I've asked him to fix things around my house but always has excuses. He did watch m...
A. 15 October 2014: Why should he help out around your house? You are no longer married.
No wonder his new marriage is in trouble, if he keeps his ex (you) in his life) and runs to her and complain about how his life sucks, it must be pretty hurtful to the wife.
... (read in full...)
Could it be men see hurt in my body language, and that's why I am still single?
Q. Dear Cupid,I really want to have a friend for the new year but no one seems to be looking my way if they are I can't tell.I have been single for many years about 13 and now I want companionship.I just turned 43 yesterday I feel and look young I ...
A. 15 October 2014: Just by going by your post, I would have guessed you were 63 not 43.
You are younger than me by 2 years, so you are not some old lady! My advice listen to FA. GET out there and SOCIALIZE - have hobbies, join a gym, hike group. Focus on socializ... (read in full...)
He's pulled away after seeming to fall for me so fast at the outset. What to do?
Q. I met a man online, we chatted, then called one another. We have talked every day since. Things were fantastic. He was falling for me so quickly that it freaked me out a little. He scared me. I have a busy life with family and friends and ...
A. 15 October 2014: He wanted a fantasy, not you. Instant perfect relationship.
If you FELT like he was going 100mph and you were comfortable with 35.. then you did nothing WRONG. For someone to come on WAY to strong when they DO NOT know you, IS a red flag. Yo... (read in full...)
I like one of my good friends brothers. Should I tell her?
Q. Dear Cupid, I like one of my good friends brothers I liked him way before we became good friends He has told me that he likes me back and we've made out on a few occasions but our friendship is always on and off. I really like him and have tho...
A. 15 October 2014: I would honestly cut the kissing out. If it's not so serious that you want to tell the sister, then don't do it.
It's not like you NEED her permission, but not telling her is kind of shady. IF you want to date him.
However, do you think he wan... (read in full...)
Is this really a ''Guy thing,'' as my fiance implies? His remarks upset me.
Q. My question is for guys. When you're in a serious relationship do you look at girls and think in your head if you could get with them, or not, if you were single? My fiance and I have a baby together and we went out to lunch near his work and he s...
A. 14 October 2014: No one goes blind when they get a partner. We all still NOTICE good looking/fit/attractive people.
BUT there is a line in the sand, when you HAVE a partner that you DO not OGLE, and you DO not bring it up, unless you are INTENTIONALLY trying t... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting about my boyfriend's comment?
Q. My boyfriend said something last night that has left me feeling insecure this morning so I would like other opinions on whether I'm overreacting and just take it as him being honest. We were talking last night about opposite sexes/physical ...
A. 14 October 2014: My husband had a thing for redheads. I'm blond. He likes BIG girls, I'm not.
My type is also very different from him in many ways, but LIKING something doesn't mean YOU have to have it.
I don't think my husband would like me better if I had ... (read in full...)
I haven't met my LD boyfriend yet but I'm not sure if I should!
Q. Hello! My LD boyfriend wants me to visit him but I don't know if I should and to even have the guts to tell my family about what he's planning? When he was in the same state as I am currently in now, he had plenty of chances to meet me, sometime...
A. 14 October 2014: I would also like to add, the fact that you haven't told your family about him speaks volumes. I can say that from personal experience. My last BF (before I met my husband) was a douche-canoe. Charming canoe for sure, but as it turned out a total ... (read in full...)
He's amazing but he does drugs. Am I being too fussy by finding it a deal breaker?
Q. I recently met a 30-year-old guy whom I hit it off really well with - he flirts with me heavily all the time and he is clearly a very kind person (he stopped to give an old lady change for the bus the other day because she couldn't find her purse - ...
A. 14 October 2014: Drugs would be a huge and absolute deal breaker for me. Same would overindulgence of lying, violence, drinking, gambling, cheating, prostitutes, strippers and a few other things..
Doing drug occasionally or recreationally doesn't make him a bad gu... (read in full...)
I'm very hurt by this comment he made! What does he mean? Is this a brush-off?
Q. I met my online friend last week which was amazing after being friends for a year. We hit it off and ther was a real connection both of us very attracted to the other. He has messaged me everyday since and we both miss each other so much already....
A. 14 October 2014: Does he already have a GF? Or do you have a BF?
The only way I can see his words making sense is if you two CAN NOT be together for whatever reason, distance, other partners, whatnot.... (read in full...)
How do I break up with this liar I love?
Q. Dear Cupid, I've met this guy ten months ago. He seemed like a decent individual. We took our time to get to know one another. We've been intimate approximately 6 times throughout the 10 months of dating. I've always been skeptical about ...
A. 14 October 2014: How do you dump him?
TEXT him if you can't do it in person.
Tell him that you have realized that you can not be with him, as he is already with someone. That you will cut the contact 100% and that he should respect that and never get in tou... (read in full...)
My husband says he's cool with me having relations with other women. How have others handled a similar situation as this?
Q. My husband and I have been married for 5 years. We have had many ups and downs but despite these we are still together and communicate with one another very openly and honestly. Lately things have been a bit rubbish and he hasn't been very attracte...
A. 14 October 2014: Sometimes people need a little bit of a wake up call, consider this yours.
I hope you two can work it out. And GOOD for you in being honest with him and yourself!
Good luck
... (read in full...)
She never got rid of the explicit pictures of her ex! Do I just throw them away or confront her?
Q. I have a question. My wife and I are together 7 years married for 5. When we moved in together she had some pictures of an ex boyfriend. I was fine with some of them but there was 1 where they were kissing and a few of him in various states o...
A. 14 October 2014: I agree with YouWish.
Pictures of exes is no biggie.. but when they are explicit or nude, it's something to get rid off once you settle into another relationship.
I would not just toss them, I would ask her to do it. I'm sure she would be thr... (read in full...)
My husband says he's cool with me having relations with other women. How have others handled a similar situation as this?
Q. My husband and I have been married for 5 years. We have had many ups and downs but despite these we are still together and communicate with one another very openly and honestly. Lately things have been a bit rubbish and he hasn't been very attracte...
A. 14 October 2014: Bit of a double standard there, you can go snog/screw another woman (or man) and he would be OK - but you DO NOT want him to do the same?
I think if you two VENTURE into this, he will eventually want to screw someone else too. I think that is ... (read in full...)
Rude abusive brother. He's especially nasty when he can't get his own way. How can I stop him speaking to me like this?
Q. I suffer from depression. My younger brother and I used to very close, but over the years he has grown distant. Although we live together, we rarely speak anymore because he is always out. When he wants something from me, he will speak to me, and...
A. 14 October 2014: When he starts getting nasty do you just stand there and take it? If so walk away.
REFUSE to engage.
And depression doesn't = failure. You know that. He knows that but he also knows exactly which buttons to push.
Have you considered s... (read in full...)
I haven't met my LD boyfriend yet but I'm not sure if I should!
Q. Hello! My LD boyfriend wants me to visit him but I don't know if I should and to even have the guts to tell my family about what he's planning? When he was in the same state as I am currently in now, he had plenty of chances to meet me, sometime...
A. 14 October 2014: I think you should LISTEN to that little voice that is telling you this may not be a great idea.
You don't really know the guy. YES you have talked on the Internet for a while, but you have no idea who he really is. Right now you BOTH have a "... (read in full...)
How do you ask your boyfriend, who is a recent IV drug user, to get tested?
Q. How do you ask your boyfriend, who is a recent IV drug user, to get tested? We are reaching the point in our relationship where we are going to be taking things to the next level physically, but I am terrified of putting myself at risk for StDs...
A. 14 October 2014: Well, you suggest to him that BEFORE you two get intimate you BOTH get a full STD + HIV panel done.
Getting yourself tested is a smart thing for several reasons, YOU have a sexual past, HE has a sexual past. And you are both old enough to know tha... (read in full...)
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