Is rejection good or bad? How does one accept and deal with rejection?
Q. I asked a female who is beautiful from work on social media if she fancied meeting me for a coffee to get to know me better. This was today, we are good friends on social media, and I decided the time was right to ask her and to seize the day. And...
A. 25 June 2016: You tried small talk (what are you doing over the week-end) and she reminded you that she had already told you... OK so maybe you weren't paying full attention.. so what? It happens.
All you can do in those situations is say; "oh yes you are righ... (read in full...)
Is rejection good or bad? How does one accept and deal with rejection?
Q. I asked a female who is beautiful from work on social media if she fancied meeting me for a coffee to get to know me better. This was today, we are good friends on social media, and I decided the time was right to ask her and to seize the day. And...
A. 24 June 2016: I wouldn't ask her out again, unless you want to be rejected again.
While her reaction was polite, it was also pretty much a no, thanks I don't want to go out with you. A no means no. In any form.
She isn't interested in you in that way.
If ... (read in full...)
Is rejection good or bad? How does one accept and deal with rejection?
Q. I asked a female who is beautiful from work on social media if she fancied meeting me for a coffee to get to know me better. This was today, we are good friends on social media, and I decided the time was right to ask her and to seize the day. And...
A. 24 June 2016: Nothing wrong in trying. Rejections always sucks, but don't let it hold you back in the future.... just MAYBE consider looking for women to date OUTSIDE of the workplace.
I feels it's just more professional that way, and less awkward when it doesn... (read in full...)
I like him , how can I show him this ?
Q. Hey everyone , Theres a guy i like and want to have a relationship with him . How can i let him know this without coming across desperate ? ive messaged him last night asking how he is , no reply as yet but i dont expect him to drop everything to ...
A. 23 June 2016: I agree, that no reply is not a great sign.
And NO do NOT tell him "I like you and if you don't like me it's all good..." no no no... That is what a 5th grader would do.
Instead when (if) he replies and the reply is longer than 3 words, ask him... (read in full...)
We agreed to remain friends but I haven't heard from him!
Q. A guy i was seeing for 5 months ended things with me a couple of months ago. From my persepctive everything was going well and had been fine between us leading up to him ending things so it really upset me as it was totally unexpected. When he ended ...
A. 23 June 2016: His offer of "friendship" was empty, I think it was to make the break up less "harsh.
As for the closure... There really is no closure HE can give you, that he hasn't already done. Maybe not in words but his actions speaks pretty loud. The rela... (read in full...)
I am low on his list of priorities!
Q. I feel like my boyfriend does not have time for me anymore an am not sure of what to do! Basically there is a culture clash and his parents want him to have an arranged marriages which he has refused to do as he is with me But I feel like everyt...
A. 22 June 2016:
I think, and I don't mean that in a frivolous sense, that you are wasting your time with him.
YOU are his excuse to NOT marry whom the family wants him to marry... for now. But he hasn't fully committed to you either, because he knows his fa... (read in full...)
How do I tell my husband nicely that due our circumstances its not a good idea to have his kids at our home?
Q. My husband wants to get his kids (16 boy,13 girl, and 8boy)today but we both work from 6am-6pm M-F. There was no date given when they will be going back home (mothers house), last visit they stayed 3wks. We are having some financial issues right now ...
A. 22 June 2016: Glad you got it sorted out.
And I would suggest your husband works out a visitation schedule that works for ALL of you. (the mom, you and himself).... (read in full...)
Why does he give gifts to ex's kids but plays the "gift game" with me?
Q. Hello my bf and I have been together for two years. He's had a close relationship with his ex during this time. Texting, emailing, calling, and seeing her. He's also very close to her daughters. He attends their games, buys them gifts and keeps ...
A. 22 June 2016: Doesn't matter if his ex's kids are his or not, he obviously bonded with them and care for them even if he is no longer dating their mom. NOTHING wrong in that.
My husband raised his ex's 2 daughter because their father was not in contact other th... (read in full...)
I have lost a lot of friends due to jealousy. Why are girls so jealous?
Q. I have lost a lot of friends due to jealousy. Why are girls so jealous? I use to have a lot of girlfriends but they all seem to disappear as my life gets better. Im a very sweet girl. I'm always there for my friends when they need me. I work rea...
A. 22 June 2016: Maybe they thought YOU were giving THEM dirty look from across the room? Since you didn't approach them either. Next time IGNORE that you "think" they are giving you dirty look and go say hi, if they don't want to continue the conversation, fine - ... (read in full...)
Can a friend forget about you while they are away?
Q. I have a friend who is abroad at the moment, she hasn't spoken to me for three to four weeks. I've not heard from her by social media and I'm beginning to lose patience. She's helping abroad and providing water to disadvantaged people and trying t...
A. 21 June 2016: And OP.... (to quote you)
" I'm just going to ignore her and give her a taste of her own medicine."
How is that going to make anything better? How is that going to help a friend?
You don't sound like you do friendships very well if... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend saying I'm not that attractive to be hit on?
Q. I would say I'm okay looking, when I'm done up I think I can look quite hot. Anyways I get hit on by guys on the way to work quite often, yesterday I had two guys actually approach me. One was when I was sitting on the bench and the guy said, can I ...
A. 21 June 2016: Well, now you know... he can't handle it. Some times we earn little idiosyncrasies about our partners, some which are more or less attractive.
... (read in full...)
What does he mean by barricades?
Q. What did he mean when he said that men and women protect themselves by using barricades? What kind of barricades is he referring too? ...
A. 21 June 2016: He is talking "walls" - emotional walls.
Some people choose to build "walls" around their emotions and themselves because they think it can prevent them from ever getting hurt again.
Others do this in the beginning of a relationship bec... (read in full...)
How do I tell my husband nicely that due our circumstances its not a good idea to have his kids at our home?
Q. My husband wants to get his kids (16 boy,13 girl, and 8boy)today but we both work from 6am-6pm M-F. There was no date given when they will be going back home (mothers house), last visit they stayed 3wks. We are having some financial issues right now ...
A. 21 June 2016: I would sit him down and mention the financial side of things. I would also bring up who is going to take care of them during the day? The 16 year old? After that I would make HIM make a plan for the week-end when he WANTS to have his kids and then ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend saying I'm not that attractive to be hit on?
Q. I would say I'm okay looking, when I'm done up I think I can look quite hot. Anyways I get hit on by guys on the way to work quite often, yesterday I had two guys actually approach me. One was when I was sitting on the bench and the guy said, can I ...
A. 21 June 2016: Oh I think he was trying to take you down a peg. He probably don't like that guys are hitting on you when he is not around (not sure if he does when he IS around you). Or he simply thought you were mentioning these guys hitting on you to "inflate ... (read in full...)
I want to marry my g/f but she won't do oral sex and its important to me
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and she wont blow me. I go down on her and tell her alot how much id like one. She says she might one day but thinks itsgross and awkward. I want to marry her one day but this is important to me. What ...
A. 21 June 2016: No, Chi I don't think of porn blow job.. I don't even WATCH porn. I speak from experience.
I had an ex who DID (I think) watch too much porn as he loved to grab hair and push it in further than what I wanted. It only happened one time, because ... (read in full...)
We kiss but don't make up
Q. I have an ex. We broke up cause a simple reason six months ago. But until now, he still ask me to meet him. Not just a simple meeting, but we do more than it. He asked to kiss me. I don't know what he really felt about me. I still love him and I ...
A. 21 June 2016: He wants to continue to USE you. He doesn't want you back, he doesn't want all the work that comes with dating you, but he wants the "benefits" of having a GF.
My advice? Whether you want him back or not - it's the same. You tell him: " I still re... (read in full...)
Can you please advise what to do? My lesbian partner has been exchanging explicit messages on line with a man
Q. I found explicit emails between my lesbian partner and a man on craigslist. I found some printed copies of her replies to a mans advert on craigslist. The man wanted to meet her for fun in exchange for money. My partner always brags about being ...
A. 21 June 2016: I means she is full of crap.
She saved his number for a reason.
Personally, if MY partner did this? I'd walk away. Yes, she hasn't physically cheated, but what she is doing is NOT OK in most relationships.
And seriously? What kind of ... (read in full...)
Help! What can I say? I'm a gay female being set up at work ! I'm scared and unsure what to do.
Q. Im a single GAY female over 40 and today at work as I walked in tea room I overheard her talking to another manager about setting me up with a 26 yr old asian guy who used to work with us and who likes me! And how I am " over 40" The other mana...
A. 21 June 2016: Go talk to your boss when she is by herself, like in her office - ask her if she has a minute. Then tell her in the nicest way that you would like her to stop trying to set you up with other co-workers or anyone in general. Tell her:" thanks for ... (read in full...)
What can I do? Don't want it rubbed in my face. But she says I'm offloading my insecurities by being upset with her
Q. My friend upset me again talking about interacting with another man who she has a past with... I've covered with her in the past that she's to have as much fun as she can with whomever she feels like regardless that I'm mad about her. We have f...
A. 21 June 2016: What does being a companion mean between you two?
You call her "my friend", and mention you have fooled around in the past, that you are NOT a couple and NOT dating.. So I have to agree with her, this IS about YOUR insecurities.
My guess is y... (read in full...)
Should I feel guilty? I told every one he has a "needle dick" after he was playing games with me!
Q. Should I feel guilty? Hi I'm Ellie and I'm seventeen years old. In a nutshell, I had this boyfriend we had a thing since september, so about 8 months. I met him when I moved schools for sixth form and we had chemistry right away. In Febuary I fou...
A. 21 June 2016: Amen to YouWish's advice.
Take it to heart and IGNORE him, BLOCK him and DELETE him from as much of your life as you can.
And remember 2 wrongs never make a right. EVER.
Apologizing is not going to fix a thing. Talking to him is not go... (read in full...)
I want to marry my g/f but she won't do oral sex and its important to me
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and she wont blow me. I go down on her and tell her alot how much id like one. She says she might one day but thinks itsgross and awkward. I want to marry her one day but this is important to me. What ...
A. 21 June 2016: I doubt it Chi...
People with a fine gag reflex have a hard time with it. People who have a partner that likes to "push" the girl's head or his penis may not enjoy it either.
I don't mind oral, but it definitely something I have done for my... (read in full...)
Can a friend forget about you while they are away?
Q. I have a friend who is abroad at the moment, she hasn't spoken to me for three to four weeks. I've not heard from her by social media and I'm beginning to lose patience. She's helping abroad and providing water to disadvantaged people and trying t...
A. 21 June 2016:
To quote Elisabeth Foley
"The most beautiful discovery true friends make is that they can grow separately without growing apart."
------------------------------------
You are expecting her to KNOW what rules YOU "play" by, and that SHE ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my LDR guy and get him to understand that this level of contact is not enough?
Q. Hi everyone, thanks for reading! Im not sure how to approach this - i basically need to talk to my boyfriend about being more in contact. We are doing a long distance relationship at the moment and everything was fine (we were skyping a few t...
A. 20 June 2016: I don't think you are nagging by telling him you miss the contact and that it went from 100 to 0 real fast and that worries you a bit. That you feel he isn't putting in as much effort as he used to.
IF you think you would lose him by bringing... (read in full...)
Why would he take my number?
Q. I gave my number to guy that I liked for a while now and told him to text me sometime..He said sure but when I saw him the next day, he made up some bs about how he broke his phone amd lost my number. I took that as polite brush off and decide to ...
A. 20 June 2016: Don't feel foolish, you didn't know he had a new GF. You made a move and it wasn't a "win". It happens.
He probably didn't want to say:" no thanks I don't want/need your number". He didn't want to hurt your feelings is my guess... so it was easi... (read in full...)
Can they really expect more hours without overtime pay?
Q. Hello, I moved to the US few months ago and I'm working in financie field and have an exempt full time position. I was hired for 40 hours work per week but my supervisor stating that we all must put some extra hours every week. I do come early ...
A. 20 June 2016: Look at your contract. If that doesn't clearly state it, contact HR.
But no, I don't think they CAN make you work extra hours for "free".
... (read in full...)
Can a friend forget about you while they are away?
Q. I have a friend who is abroad at the moment, she hasn't spoken to me for three to four weeks. I've not heard from her by social media and I'm beginning to lose patience. She's helping abroad and providing water to disadvantaged people and trying t...
A. 20 June 2016: She isn't going to "forget" you, but she might just be VERY busy with her volunteer work and making new friends and acquaintances - which... is quite normal.
You are still back where you are with less new things to adapt too, explore and learn. S... (read in full...)
What do you miss about an ex that makes you want them back?
Q. Hey! This is mainly a question for guys out there - I'm just wondering; when you think about an ex that you would still want back, what are the reasons you miss them or hold on to them still? (apart from loving them etc) - Maybe qualities they h...
A. 20 June 2016: I think people OFTEN look back on exes with either "black" or "rose" colored glasses.
If they feel lonely and don't have a new partner, they might start to miss an ex. They will disregard the REASON they broke up and all the negative things a... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I should tell my friend I like her?
Q. Hi this is probably going to be a long post but I'm not sure if I should tell my friend that I like her. It started when we were having a girls night and we both mentionned how we were both bisexual but hadnt ever kissed a girl in a non-platonic w...
A. 20 June 2016: She knows. And while the BF might be leaving... he isn't gone yet. And you don't know if they are doing some LDR or whatnot.
Secondly.... She was using you as a guinea pig. She already had a BF, but disregarded how HE might feel about her kissing ... (read in full...)
I've asked my ex 3 times if he wants to hook up. He always says yes but it never happens
Q. Okay, so I've been horny lately and I ended up asking my ex if he was interested in hooking up and he said yes. But we never did it. I asked him 3 times, each time after I waited 2 weeks. The last time I asked was 4 weeks ago, and he said he was ...
A. 20 June 2016: OP,
All we can do is guess. We don't know the guy. YOU do. So why not just ASK him why he keeps saying yes, but there is no action backing is words up?
Another guess....
(could also be that he has met someone else and hasn't told you, or ... (read in full...)
How should I behave when I meet his parents? They live abroad and I don't speak their language.
Q. Hi agony aunts! So my boyfriend and I have been together for a while now and we've decided to take the next step. Meeting the parents! Problem is his parents live abroad and I can't speak a word of their language. We're staying at his parents...
A. 20 June 2016: There is an APP for that!!
Honestly there are SEVERAL translator apps you can use with your cell-phone (depending on type) so GO GOOGLE that!!
And learning a few simple phrases is also smart.
Be polite. And if you don't know what you say,... (read in full...)
Overwhelming depression has descended on me knowing my Bf will be away with his family until July. How can I stop this depression? What do I need to do about this?
Q. My boyfriend is away on a trip with his family. He hasn't even been gone two days and won't be back until the first week of July. I am not sure if this is normal but I am severely depressed. I have been crying a lot and have isolated myse...
A. 20 June 2016: I agree with the aunties here.
You need to stop it. It's 2-3 weeks without him, not 2-3 months or years.
I'm sure you have been on your own before and MIGHT be on your own again in the future from time to time and you know what ? THAT IS health... (read in full...)
She's giving me mixed signals. Does she like ? Is she being genuine?
Q. While I was at work, I noticed that a female has taken a shine to me, I don't know if I read into the wrong or she genuinely liked me. I've not asked her out, but I'm thinking of doing and im not sure what to do for the best. While I was making m...
A. 20 June 2016: I agree with jls022
MODIFY your e-mail to her. I like jls022 version MUCH better than yours (sorry)....
And maybe think LONG and HARD whether you want to even TRY this or not. Because if it doesn't work out... you still have to SEE her ... (read in full...)
I've asked my ex 3 times if he wants to hook up. He always says yes but it never happens
Q. Okay, so I've been horny lately and I ended up asking my ex if he was interested in hooking up and he said yes. But we never did it. I asked him 3 times, each time after I waited 2 weeks. The last time I asked was 4 weeks ago, and he said he was ...
A. 20 June 2016: I agree with WiseOwlE
He isn't interested. IF he was... he would find a way to meet up. He wouldn't just say yes and NOT back it up.
... (read in full...)
His kiss has upset my calm
Q. I have a bf of over a year however recently something happened with a work colleague. The guy from work kissed me after a night out but now has said we can't talk outside of work anymore as his gf thinks there is something between us. I'm feeli...
A. 20 June 2016: I agree with Auntie BimBim and Auntie SVC.
The guy has a GF, he wants NOTHING to do without outside of work and my guess is... only deal with you with regards to work related issues AT work. His GF has suspicions because he has behaved in a way to... (read in full...)
My husband wont talk to his 26 year old that doesn't work, bathe or interact with people!
Q. Hello. In searching for an answer or at best some understanding to a terrible situation, I found this sight. To say that I'm thankful is an understatement. I have a 26-year-old stepson whose hygiene and overall laziness drives me crazy. He doesn't ...
A. 20 June 2016: I'd buy some Febreeze (room-deodorizer) and put them in his room. Other than that, I don't know what you can do. He is a GROWN MAN of 26. He doesn't even have basic hygiene? gross. Do you buy him soaps/shampoo etc? Do his laundry? Because I'd simply ... (read in full...)
I want to marry my g/f but she won't do oral sex and its important to me
Q. I have been with my girlfriend for 5 years and she wont blow me. I go down on her and tell her alot how much id like one. She says she might one day but thinks itsgross and awkward. I want to marry her one day but this is important to me. What ...
A. 20 June 2016: So in exchange for a ring on her finger you think she should start to do oral?
Some people just don't like certain sex acts. I for instance don't even want to TRY anal because it's just doesn't appeal to me. My husband has always been fine wit... (read in full...)
Why is this guy acting immaturely at work to ruin my friendship with a another co-worker?
Q. I work for a company and enjoy the job I do, and I've made friends which is good. The problem is there's this lad who is like a reaptive parrot and copies everything I say. There's this female who says hi to me and asks me how I am, so when ive ...
A. 19 June 2016: Ignore him or call him out on being an ass.
Like:" You know I wasn't talking to you or about you, so how about you butt out, buddy?"
Sooner or later he will realize he isn't being as funny as he thinks. Hopefully.... (read in full...)
High Libido and still a virgin. Am I weird or is it somewhat normal for my age to use masturbation to relieve my sexual tension?
Q. Hi agony aunts. So I'll be 17 soon and am not yet sexually active. Problem is my hormones have been driving me crazy since I turned 11/12 (when I hit puberty). That is the time when I started masturbating (please don't tell me its a sin or anything...
A. 18 June 2016: It's totally normal. Being a "virgin" doesn't mean you won't have urges or surges of hormones.
If it helps you? Go for it. I would just hold off on adding porn to the picture. I think it can give a inexperienced person a total skewered view of ... (read in full...)
Painful foreplay is a turnoff
Q. I am in a relationship for more than a year , while have foreplay with my gf she feel extreme pain and that moment will be the end of our quality time. And after a year still she is virgin. Is there any problem in her or anything that we can make ...
A. 18 June 2016: I agree that her going to see her gynecologist should be on the top of the list.
Secondly, what kind of foreplay are "we" talking about here? Maybe it's something you need to learn how to do differently. If you are trying to insert fingers,... (read in full...)
Lonely in a foreign hospital waiting for medical evacuation to a spinal unit and despite this my Gf is uncaring about the severity of the situation. Time to get rid of the Gf?
Q. I had a motorcycle accident last saturday whilst on holiday where I was initially paralysed from the neck down then recovered feelings. It will be a long term healing process as I struggle to walk, have spine damage etc. I am determined to do what I ...
A. 18 June 2016: Maybe she didn't know WHAT to say? Or she was trying to cheer you up by talking about something OTHER than you injuries and what MAY or MAY no happen to you physically.
Obviously this is a BIG deal for BOTH of you. She however can "leave" if she c... (read in full...)
Why did my boyfriend tell me to be a good girl while he is overseas on a trip?
Q. My boyfriend is travelling overseas to visit his family. He just texted me before boarding the plane saying he will miss me and that he'd see me in a few weeks. Then he told me to be a good girl for him while he is gone. That he will be a go...
A. 18 June 2016: I think he was trying to be cute.
I wouldn't read more into it than that.
Personally, I'd ask my partner what makes him think I need to be told to be "good".... But I wouldn't make a big deal out of it.... (read in full...)
What is my Bf's mother's problem? I try to be nice and friendly and she is horrible back to me.
Q. I went to visit my boyfriend (23). First thing she says is your eating at this time, looking down on me. She is then silent. I felt awkward. So I tried to start a friendly conversation. I said my sister got 3 kittens to look after. She said how...
A. 18 June 2016: I think she doesn't like to "share" her boy. She wants to assert her "dominance" in the sense that HE is HERS (not as in lover, but mom comes first kinda way).
She might still see him as HER "little" boy so you being there upsets the status q... (read in full...)
Am I being paranoid or is my husband a cheater?
Q. I have been married for over 25 years, but am currently separated from my husband due to various issues. One of the issues is suspected cheating, which my husband denies. I just wanted to hear other peoples perspective on this, as my husbands...
A. 18 June 2016: OP,
It seems to me whether he is cheating or not is irrelevant, the marriage in no longer healthy nor sustainable.
Could he have been cheating? Sure. IS there concrete "evidence" in what you posted, that he cheated? Inconclusive I'd... (read in full...)
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