I still haven't met his teenage daughter after a year of dating and I'm tired of feeling like a mistress
Q. Hi everyone! I've been dating my BF for over a year now and he has a 14 told daughter. last year, two months into our relationship, he suddenly disappears for 2 months without even a text or a call. Although I had just started to date him, I w...
A. 9 May 2017: Maybe it's for the best if he DOESN'T move in with you? I mean honestly?
Seems like there will ALWAYS be an excuse to not fully commit to you.
And as for dating a dad, I wouldn't presume ALL dads would do this. This is JUST one man. (who ha... (read in full...)
Can you be pregnant with negative test results?
Q. I had sex with a guy one night in September. I dont really remember what happened but i know we had sex. We used a condom but i am unsure if he secretly slipped it off or of the condom may have failed. It isvDecember now and my stomach looks ...
A. 4 March 2017: Thank you for the update, OP
Did you get an ultrasound? (I'm guessing you did since they measured these fibroids) And what did that tell you?
And definitely get a referral to a GYNO that KNOWS or specialize in these things.
And I would not... (read in full...)
Why do men insist on commenting about other women's looks?
Q. I was wondering if anyone could shed some light in this for me . A guy was seeing went out of his was to make a point to me how beautiful his ex wife was. I have also noticed before that men seem to do this when on dates sometimes . They seem to ...
A. 6 January 2017: If it seems to be a pattern, maybe you need to look into how you date and how you select whom you will meet up with and date. And WHERE you met these guy (as in maybe the dating site).
Switch it up.
Personally, I get why it makes you feel l... (read in full...)
After my past life I can't face his sexual demands
Q. I am 42 and have been through a lot. I have been rapped when I was younger and beat by my mom and almost every guy I have been with. I need help trying to figure out something. My boyfriend gets mad at me for not wanting to do a 3-some. I ha...
A. 6 January 2017: OP, you have EVERY right to say NO I don't WANT to do a 3-some. He can get mad all he wants you do NOT OWE him a 3-some. And maybe you need to reconsider this relationship as well.
Giving in and doing what HE wants IS not going to make him CARE... (read in full...)
He wants me to be his accountability partner!
Q. I write articles online and some commenters are allowed to message me on an anonymous mail for private conversations. My type of articles are centred around happenings in everyday life and the struggles faced by youths but I'm in no way an expert...
A. 6 January 2017: I would suggest that you tell him you can not do that for him, that he will need someone who is first of all close to him (physically, as in PART of his daily life) and secondly someone who knows him. Someone online can encourage, advice etc. but ... (read in full...)
Why is my ex boyfriend still so angry at me?
Q. why is my ex boyfriend still so angry at me? He broke off our relationship six months ago for no reason that I could see. When I asked him all he could say was that he wanted someone who was the same every day. Makes no sense as I am always i...
A. 5 January 2017: Are you still in contact with him? If so... CUT the contact, stop letting him drag you down.
If he is MAD at you, then LET him. You can't change or control how he feels. BUT you can control the contact and how YOU deal with it all.
But CUT... (read in full...)
Why do men insist on commenting about other women's looks?
Q. I was wondering if anyone could shed some light in this for me . A guy was seeing went out of his was to make a point to me how beautiful his ex wife was. I have also noticed before that men seem to do this when on dates sometimes . They seem to ...
A. 5 January 2017: In this case, I think it can be two-fold.
1. He thinks YOU will find him more attractive/charming because he had a "pretty" partner. So he actually USES that point to try and "sell" himself. "Look ma! I had a pretty GF!"
2. He perhaps isn't en... (read in full...)
He proposed but there is no date set!
Q. I have been living with my boyfriend for the last 3.5 yrs. 2 yrs ago he proposed. Even thought it wasnt the most romantic proposal, it felt like the world to me. It was my own fairytale. He was my first love, high school sweetheart that guy that u ...
A. 5 January 2017: He said...
"He wants to do it right, when the moment comes if the moment comes."
--------------------------
I would give him back the ring and tell him that he SHOULD not have proposed if he didn't think marrying was the "right" thing to do WITH... (read in full...)
His behavior has me asking if he is bisexual!
Q. Hey everyone, Thanks for taking the time to hear me out. I met my boyfriend in college almost 3 years ago. We've gotten along great and haven't had any serious issues...until now. I've just recently noticed that his behavior is a little od...
A. 5 January 2017: Wanting anal doesn't make him gay or bi. I think that it's just one of those things a LOT of people do sexually, due to porn and the taboo factor.
However, I DO think he is bi, whether he wants to "admit" it or not. Maybe your BF isn't comforta... (read in full...)
Should I tell her he cheated on both of us?
Q. Hi, I had a difficult abusive relationship before hand. I met someone from out the country and he made me trust again and go out again. I was content with his friendship but he pursued it to something more. Time for him to leave. He wanted me to go ...
A. 4 January 2017: I understand how you feel.
The biggest reason people don't tell a close friend is usually for several reasons.
1. they don't want to be the bearer of bad news and lose the friendship.
2. they think the GF/BF (the one being cheated on) must s... (read in full...)
I don't want to nag, but my boyfriend won't shower. Solutions? How should I respond?
Q. I'm 26 and I've just got into a relationship with a guy who's just turned 25. We've been seeing each other for months and we've been official for less than 3 weeks. As you can imagine I'm still in the honeymoon phase but he's straight away made him...
A. 4 January 2017: You know, OP, this will only get worse, right?
Someone how doesn't take care of his OWN body, health and hygiene are not going to take care of YOURS either. Does he brush his teeth? Wash his face?
My guess is, he also lives in a pigsty? Dirty ... (read in full...)
Should I tell her he cheated on both of us?
Q. Hi, I had a difficult abusive relationship before hand. I met someone from out the country and he made me trust again and go out again. I was content with his friendship but he pursued it to something more. Time for him to leave. He wanted me to go ...
A. 4 January 2017: Are YOU still with him?
Because if you are you need to "tell" yourself first, not her. Which means END it and walk away from him, block and delete and CUT him off.
If you HAVE ended it and want to warn her, I can understand it, especially if sh... (read in full...)
Do his comments about other women signify insecurity or a potential cheat?
Q. Hey, My boyfriend is very loving, sweet, complimentary etc but he does this thing that is really starting to grate on me... Basically when we watch films/ tv when a fit women comes on he's VERY vocal about it I.e. "id put it in her" "she's so s...
A. 4 January 2017: I agree with Ivyblue
I'd be BLUNT with him. ABSOLUTELY blunt. And I'd tell him to keep his locker room mentality to the locker room with his male friends. That you find his comments unattractive, disrespectful, degrading and a turn-off.
I don't... (read in full...)
We've Texted, met, dated. What do you think is going on with him? 3
Q. Meet this guy 40 like me, tons of stuff in common brillent chemistry. We've been talking for about 5wks now, been on 2 dates. He calls me not only to set up dates but to talk. He texts every morning to wish me a good day etc. He texted me yesterda...
A. 3 January 2017: There you go :)
Maybe not the "best" excuse, but he DID let you know that he was aware that he forgot and that he will try better.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend didn't include me in his birthday plans
Q. Is my boyfriend trying to distance himself from me? Or is he trying to break up with me slowly? My boyfriend is acting like a jerk and didnt invite me to his birthday celebration. We spent NYE together and everything was normal. He was ...
A. 3 January 2017: Ask him?
We can only guess.... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got distracted while texting me
Q. Please tell me if I should be pissed here. My bf and I were having a conversation by text and right in the middle of it, he disappears. Stops texting. So I texted him "u went away?" Then about 5-10 minutes later he replied "sorry I got distracted...
A. 3 January 2017: Was he at work when he got "distracted by a co-worker"? If so, I think you are nuts for being pissy about it. He is at work to DO a job, not chat you up and text you. Seriously.
You are not 16, so I presume you understand that when you are a gr... (read in full...)
I am no longer happy with my BF. what should I do?
Q. I've been with my partner for 18 months, and after 8 months I moved into his parents house after moving out of my family home. (my step sister was kicked out and needed somewhere to live). We've recently started renting a flat together and since mo...
A. 3 January 2017: I agree, look for a roommate situation.
And while you look for that, STOP doing his washing or pick up after him, if that means the house becomes a pigsty... let it. I KNOW it's hard to do but you are ENABLING him to not lift a finger.
Tell ... (read in full...)
What I want to know is, if he is seeing my ex best friend then would he really want to stay friends and in touch with me when there is a good chance I would eventually find out
Q. My boyfriend of one year an I split up 8 weeks ago. We split because I thought he was seeing my best friend....I still do. He has ALWAYS sworn that he never had and never would have anything to do with her and that one day I will see that. He tells...
A. 3 January 2017: I fully agree with YouWish.
Why you want to keep wasting your time on a man who is NOT going to be who you want him to be or who you "think" he can be, is beyond me.
Cut the contact. Look back and see the red flags so that you can recognize th... (read in full...)
Why is he doing this? He tells me its my fault
Q. My question is me and my boyfriend have been dating for over a year. I have been deeply in love with this guy for a long time, we enjoy the same things we have fun together,but recently things have changed for the worse, we no long do things t...
A. 3 January 2017: Why is he doing this? Why is he being abusive?
Well, because he is a total twat and because YOU allow it.
TAKE your stuff, PACK your bags, anything you have at his place and get out. Get away from him.
He hasn't suddenly changed. THIS i... (read in full...)
We've Texted, met, dated. What do you think is going on with him? 3
Q. Meet this guy 40 like me, tons of stuff in common brillent chemistry. We've been talking for about 5wks now, been on 2 dates. He calls me not only to set up dates but to talk. He texts every morning to wish me a good day etc. He texted me yesterda...
A. 3 January 2017: Did HE go back to work today as well? If so maybe he is busy. Though taking 3 minutes to text "good morning" shouldn't be too overwhelming IMHO.
Since you left the ball in his court I'd give him a day or two and see if he reaches out if he hasn'... (read in full...)
Why in the world can't I move on?! ?
Q. I have been through a couple of serious breakups in my life but for some reason the one that happened recently has seemingly destroyed me. I dated someone for a very short period of time albeit knowing him for over 12 years. We were only together...
A. 3 January 2017: You dated a "collector". Think of a person who is into rare books, coins, stamps.... whatever. Someone who likes to collect things for the prestige and because deep down they hope it will eventually pay off for them.
Your "collector" pursued ... (read in full...)
Should my BF come to a wedding on his birthday? What would be appropriate to do in this situation?
Q. I've been in a relationship for 3 months now and all is going well. We've met each other's friends and spend lots of time together. He's very considerate and caring. I am very happy! However, I'm a chronic worrier and tend to worry wore somet...
A. 2 January 2017: When do you need to RSVP to the Wedding? My advice, ASK him again the week BEFORE the RSVP deadline and get a concrete answer, yes or no.
If he doesn't WANT to go but rather celebrate with family and friends, I think you need to accept that. If... (read in full...)
Why cant my wife say sorry?
Q. I have been noticing for a few years now that my wife never can bring herself up to say sorry! I am much more of a perfectionist than her. She has messed up a lot of things in the past - like check writing (once she added $1195 and 25 to en...
A. 2 January 2017: I'm with auntie eyeswideopen...
While I guess she COULD have apologized for eating and allowing your CHILD to eat some of the 4 allocated snacks, I can see why she didn't apologize. Especially if you "demanded" she apologizes. It's snacks. ... (read in full...)
Why cant my wife say sorry?
Q. I have been noticing for a few years now that my wife never can bring herself up to say sorry! I am much more of a perfectionist than her. She has messed up a lot of things in the past - like check writing (once she added $1195 and 25 to en...
A. 2 January 2017: I'm with auntie eyeswideopen...
While I guess she COULD have apologized for eating and allowing your CHILD to eat some of the 4 allocated snacks, I can see why she didn't apologize. Especially if you "demanded" she apologizes. It's snacks. ... (read in full...)
Do all middle aged men want younger women?
Q. Are there any men in there late 40s or 50s who physically desire women the same age or do they all prefer younger women? I find I am approached a fair bit by younger guys but ones my age seem to be interested in 20-30 yr olds. The most recent ...
A. 2 January 2017: I don't think ALL men really WANT a younger partner (especially if they have dated a few half their own age). But I do think men more than women seek younger partners when they themselves are in their 40's- and up. Some because they were really TOO ... (read in full...)
His reaction made me feel guilty. Should I have gone there when he asked me to come over ?
Q. My boyfriend called on a Sunday as soon as he woke up, which was the same time I woke up. He asked me "come over, I'll change the oil in your car", and since I just woke up and haven't walked my little dogs for a couple days because of the cold wea...
A. 2 January 2017: I don't know how long you two have been dating, but I think YOU need to pay close attention to his behavior.
If the relationship is about 6-8 months old, then YOU need to be aware that his "true" self is coming out now. He feels SECURE in the rela... (read in full...)
How can I respond to my BF over these very ugly sneakers he gave me for Christmas?
Q. My boyfriend got me these ugly knee high sneakers for Christmas. I acted grateful and thanked him. They really didn't fit me (thank goodness). So I took them back to the store and just planned to get something else. He's been driving me c...
A. 2 January 2017: I agree with Tisha, you need to just be honest. You don't HAVE to be blunt about it, just honest.
The: "I didn't want to hurt your feelings but they are just NOT something I'd wear, no matter how trendy they are."
I think the knee high Conver... (read in full...)
Wedding is booked. But groom has cold feet. He's 40 and is fearful of commitment. What should I do?
Q. Hi We are due to get married in just a few weeks time. A number of days ago, my fiancee has said to me he has cold feet about the wedding and is overcome with nervousness and fear about the day itself, growing up and getting married. We are ...
A. 2 January 2017: Well, I'd have a chat with him.
YOU have to decide if you want to BE with him if he makes that choice. If he still has doubts after 6 years, it's NOT going to happen.
And I think it's BETTER to CANCEL the wedding, then try and "force" him to m... (read in full...)
His reaction made me feel guilty. Should I have gone there when he asked me to come over ?
Q. My boyfriend called on a Sunday as soon as he woke up, which was the same time I woke up. He asked me "come over, I'll change the oil in your car", and since I just woke up and haven't walked my little dogs for a couple days because of the cold wea...
A. 2 January 2017: The reason he acted like a spoiled brat was because you didn't drop everything, THAT was on purpose. To MAKE you feel guilty.
What I don't get is why you didn't just say hey, I can come over as soon as I am done with walking the dogs, they nee... (read in full...)
Do abusers set out to deliberately hurt the self esteem of another?
Q. Are there seriously people who will try to bring down a partners self esteem by making them feel bad about them self is making them feel too old for anyone else to want and not as attractive as other women ( or men ) etc . I ask because I've rec...
A. 1 January 2017: I agree with Aidan,
There isn't a cut and dry answer as ALL people are different. But what seems to be one of the MAIN attributes of narcissists and abusive people is that they do NOT have empathy. They SIMPLY lack the capability to understa... (read in full...)
My jobless, lazy boyfriend is using me for money. He thinks what's mine is also his
Q. Okay so my boyfriend and I have been together for over a year, he has been living with me and my family for about 8 months, for the past 6 months he has been unemployed and living off of me completely. Recently I was fortunate enough to come into a ...
A. 1 January 2017: He can BE a sweet guy, but that doesn't MEAN you are now responsible for him, financially or otherwise. Tell him he has 14 days to move out, that it's OVER you can't afford to have him as your BF any longer.
This is NOT his money. It's NOT "our... (read in full...)
Would you tolerate a man calling you extremely derogatory, filthy name during arguments?
Q. Would you talk with a man who calls you a c....t during arguments ? He seems to think this is acceptable and rarely apologises . Even if he does , it happens again the very next time we argue . I've had enough and my confidence is completely shot . ...
A. 1 January 2017: I'd say this, whether it's "normal" or not... YOU can CHOOSE to not allow this unless he is your husband, do you HAVE to continue to talk to this guy?
If someone talked to me this way, they would get cut from my life. Because I realize that I c... (read in full...)
Am I wasting my time with him? Should I say something to him?
Q. I have a friend who claims he wants to be more than friends We once went on a date 2 years ago but for some reason ill never know he chickened out meeting up again . Fast forward to now he says hes sorted his head out and knows what he wants . ...
A. 1 January 2017: Have you two been on dates in PERSON or is this all "talk" from his end?
Wanting a relationship takes more than texting and FB messages.
Him being on a dating site doesn't mean he isn't wanted to date you, BUT it also shows that he doesn't ... (read in full...)
I still haven't met his teenage daughter after a year of dating and I'm tired of feeling like a mistress
Q. Hi everyone! I've been dating my BF for over a year now and he has a 14 told daughter. last year, two months into our relationship, he suddenly disappears for 2 months without even a text or a call. Although I had just started to date him, I w...
A. 31 December 2016: I have 2 teen and one tween daughter, so I can easily imagine that this daughter of his doesn't WANT to meet you, the new GF. And I can also easily see why he isn't enforcing that she should meet you. I think guilt plays a major role here.
Do yo... (read in full...)
How do I tell a sexting creep I'm not interested without hurting him.
Q. Hi every one, I need help to tell him I'm nit interested. I had a one night stand about 5 months ago, and have been texting him since. But he has tried sexting me for a few weeks now, I keep trying to change the subject, but he's not getting ...
A. 31 December 2016: Just tell him that you are going to block his number because you don't wish to continue these conversations and you find his persistence creepy. block his number. YOU do not owe him politeness or to sext back. Or if you don't want to TELL him he is ... (read in full...)
I just broke up with my BF and I am upset. Any advice. please?
Q. I told my boyfriend of almost 7 months that I loved him. He didn't say it back. I asked him why and he said he just doesn't feel that way. And that when he feels it he will let me know. He had a very nice ex girlfriend for two years and he sai...
A. 31 December 2016: I think you did the right thing for the both of you.
It's not fair of him to "waste" you time if he isn't SURE he feels something deeper for you. He did that with his ex, so it MIGHT be a pattern with him. I mean WHO dates someone for 2 whole ye... (read in full...)
Does he possibly still like me? Is it normal behaviour to spend Xmas with your ex and not with a child he fathered?
Q. Me and my ex split in November 2013 due to him leaving for a new job then couple months later me finding out he met someone he knew and having a kid with her. Which I've asked many times but he will always denie anything. Anyway Feb this yr he r...
A. 30 December 2016: Why are you doing this to yourself?
So what if you have feelings for him, he is NOT available to you. HE has a partner and a KID. You get the sloppy seconds. And so what that he spend Christmas day with you? IT doesn't mean he CARED deeply f... (read in full...)
He is two different boyfriends in one. Mr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. He's making me feel scared. what should I do?
Q. MODNOTE FREE UK resources added by the Moderator: http://www.nationaldomesticviolencehelpline.org.uk/if-you-are-a-woman-experiencing-domestic-violence.aspx Phone 0808 2000 247 in UK and http://www.refuge.org.uk/what-we-do/our-services/helpline/ ...
A. 30 December 2016: His brother didn't "make" him become abusive. So PLEASE do not make up excuses for his behavior.
WHY are you staying with him after he laid his hands on you the FIRST time?
Hei s NOT two different guys, he is a part good guy (when he WANTS t... (read in full...)
He is moving too fast, talking children, houses and marriage. He already has three kids.
Q. I need some advice I met this guy years ago down the pub via mutual friends he admitted he liked me never felt that same way. He then stopped speaking to me due to new gd etc and now has 3 kids with her who is now an ex September those yr he sees ...
A. 30 December 2016: Talk about DESPERATE! This guy wants an instant relationship with you, my guess is because he KNOWS that if you two take it slow you will NOT want a long term relationship with him. He thinks by pushing it as fast as he can with ALL the bells and ... (read in full...)
Can you be pregnant with negative test results?
Q. I had sex with a guy one night in September. I dont really remember what happened but i know we had sex. We used a condom but i am unsure if he secretly slipped it off or of the condom may have failed. It isvDecember now and my stomach looks ...
A. 30 December 2016: Move your doc appointment up.
And yes, most over the counter tests are reliable these days as LONG as you follow the instructions.
IF you have tested more than once and they were both negative, you can actually still be pregnant as "Lik... (read in full...)
Is he not interested or just bad at texting?
Q. Recently I've been talking to a guy, we live a long distance from each other so our main form of communication is texting. At first we texted frequently and the conversation flowed. However after a few weeks he kept taking longer and longer to ...
A. 30 December 2016: Yep, he is not interested in anything but to have someone to chat with occasionally when he is bored.
If you are looking for a relationship or someone to talk to, look closer to home. Texting is all fine and dandy, but it's rarely sustaina... (read in full...)
I've given her support over the years. But now she seems to have dropped me. Should I just accept her rejection and move on?
Q. My friend is mad at me after constantly asking me for advice and not liking my advice. Okay I have this friend from college - we met in class 3 years ago and kept an in-class friendship, we messaged almost every day on Facebook but we live 3 ho...
A. 30 December 2016: It seems to me that you need to learn to be YOUR OWN best friend because you are NOT doing that now when you are allowing her to walk all over you constantly.
She seems like an "emotional vampire" or a "user" - someone who SUCKS other people d... (read in full...)
What do I do? Don't want to split up. Yet also don't want a Bf who behaves like a cheater 2.
Q. hiya everyone me and my fiance have been together for 3 years. A few month ago he started to add women on facebook the women he added were the type of women he said he would like as a girlfriend. I asked him why he was adding them (he hardly uses ...
A. 30 December 2016: You need to sit him down and talk boundaries and standards. WHAT is OK in your relationship later (if you still marry) in your marriage.
I'd tell him STRAIGHT up that people do NOT get "added" to people's FC account without an invitation and with... (read in full...)
Is AB more important to my Bf than he implies? I believe he loves me. But I only sharing him with AB?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 years and some change. When I left for college he became really close with a female friend( I'll call her AB). I do know her but I don't know her that well because we were never friends we just all kno...
A. 29 December 2016: Now you may not like what I have to say, and I MIGHT be totally wrong but this is how your situation looks to me (based on your post).
You said that he knew her in Highschool but they weren't friends back then, at least NOT close friends - howeve... (read in full...)
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