Ladies what would you suggest? She's caught my eye. But I'm not sure what my next move should be.
Q. This will seem funny for a 34 year old man to be seeking advice on. Basically, I go to the same shop a few times a week. There is a lady works there who has really caught my eye, whenever she is there when I go in, I get butterflies and feel...
A. 3 February 2017: Good for seeing the opportunity and to "read" her information right.
Good luck, I hope it works out well for the two of you!... (read in full...)
Should I dump uni' for a small screen role?
Q. Hi everybody, I have a difficult decision to make. I am a student at uni studying accountancy. About half a year ago I suffered a nervous breakdown and was allowed to take break from my studies. I was experiencing a deep depression and took this ...
A. 2 February 2017: Thanks for the update!
Well, that should give you a nudge to finish your degree and work on saving up for the psychology courses.
The whole notion of "casting couch" and women in movies and tv being objects is nothing new, it's just a shame it ... (read in full...)
My husband can't see the problems with his ex wife ...
Q. My husband and his ex have not spoken in years because of all the trouble she caused at the beginning of our relationship. She called begging him to come sleep with her, she kept asking to come over claiming she needed closure (she was the one who ...
A. 1 February 2017: OP, for now, FOCUS on the PPD and the new baby but DO ASK your husband HOW he would feel if YOU were busy getting reacquainted with an ex-BF who had been a cheat and dumped you and who are tried to create much drama in the beginning of your ... (read in full...)
Grossed Out by Violent Behavior
Q. Hi. I wrote two times here about an older man I had a crush on, got advice here, stepped back and realized that like the aunts and uncles warned that he was a no go. (Thanks again!) I've been cordial since he works/lives not too far from where I ...
A. 1 February 2017: I think you handled it right, and my guess is he will look elsewhere you a younger and more naive girl than you who doesn't know him that well.
I don't think he will chase you or anything BUT do pay attention if he starts to linger when you get ... (read in full...)
He says he chose to watch porn when he was missing me. Were his actions out of line? how have others handled a similar situation?
Q. Should I be upset by this or not?. My boyfriend and I had an argument last week. He assumed that was seeing someone else, which I wasn't. We made up yesterday, but something bothered me. He said that on the night we argued, he went on to a por...
A. 31 January 2017: I would be OK with that.
He could have gone out and had an ONS (one night's stand), but he looked at porn instead and when that didn't feel right or good to him he stopped.
Just because you had an argument or semi-broke up doesn't mean he ... (read in full...)
He gets my hopes up talking about having kids and then changes his mind!
Q. hello all of you, I'm Lauren, I would like you all to know my name. I need some advice. I have just come out of a 16 year relationship, my now ex was a lot older than me and had his fill of life experience, married, 4 kids, divorced and th...
A. 31 January 2017: Sounds to me like you WANT both kids AND marriage, but thought if you SETTLED for "just" having a kid it would work out.
I think you figured you "gave up" marriage for him she he should be OK with a kid for you.
He wants NEITHER, he keep... (read in full...)
Should I pay attention to his behavioral patterns
Q. When I was in undergrad 7 years ago I was partnered with one of my classmates (Tom) to do a class project. at the time I was in an unhealthy relationship and every time I went tto class I got attention from Tom. Both me and tom were attracted to ...
A. 31 January 2017: I think your friends are right. Where there is smoke there is fire.
Someone who goes through women like him, are probably not really ready or willing to have a serious relationship. At least 5 women in 6 years doesn't really seem like a guy who ... (read in full...)
Ladies what would you suggest? She's caught my eye. But I'm not sure what my next move should be.
Q. This will seem funny for a 34 year old man to be seeking advice on. Basically, I go to the same shop a few times a week. There is a lady works there who has really caught my eye, whenever she is there when I go in, I get butterflies and feel...
A. 30 January 2017: I would NOT ask her out right off the bat. I would start with some small talk so you can learn her name and maybe if she is single.
If she is married or have a BF a Valentine and offer of a date might not be a great move, especially if you want... (read in full...)
I like masturbating in places where I might get caught
Q. I have a problem and I know it's wrong but I can't stop doing it...please help. I masturbate a lot, which I guess is not that bad, but I like doing it in situations when I might get caught. Or I intentionally don't clean up probably as it g...
A. 30 January 2017: I don't know what sentence exposing yourself in public carries in the UK, but maybe you should look into that.
And maybe remember that YOU may enjoy it but most people around you DO NOT enjoy you jerking off in public. It's probably one of the l... (read in full...)
Should I dump uni' for a small screen role?
Q. Hi everybody, I have a difficult decision to make. I am a student at uni studying accountancy. About half a year ago I suffered a nervous breakdown and was allowed to take break from my studies. I was experiencing a deep depression and took this ...
A. 30 January 2017: Yes, if you finish your degree (even if you don't work in the field) IS useful.
And having 2 degrees might even be better (again even if one of them is something you will never use).
So I would finish it no matter what, whether it's right away ... (read in full...)
How can I end this selfishness in my marriage?
Q. Hi guys. Im just looking for a bit of advice. Im 24 years old and I married my husband last year. Lately he has been very selfish and entitalled. Every morning he is rude and angry. He always complains about having to go to work. I am so sick and ...
A. 30 January 2017: Wow, he sounds like a total brat.
First off I'm sorry for the loss of your Dad. I can't believe your husband is not supportive of your grief at all, what kind of person doesn't support their spouse through a loss like that?
Second, of al... (read in full...)
Gave up my family and now he treats me badly
Q. Hello all. I'm married for 20 months now. It was a love marriage, a run-away marriage actually. My husband was the nicest man ever. So polite so caring so adorable. After I ran away from my home and few months passed he changed. He has become...
A. 30 January 2017: I'm sorry OP,
He might have been loving WHILE getting you to agree to run away but once he "had" you as a wife you are no more than property to him and he treats you as such.
You really didn't KNOW him when you ran off to marry him. You knew th... (read in full...)
Should I dump uni' for a small screen role?
Q. Hi everybody, I have a difficult decision to make. I am a student at uni studying accountancy. About half a year ago I suffered a nervous breakdown and was allowed to take break from my studies. I was experiencing a deep depression and took this ...
A. 30 January 2017: If you only have a few more months left to study and the shooting doesn't start til June I'd try and do both. Or like Auntie YouWish mentioned, finishing the last semester online.
If you can't do both (RIGHT NOW) go for the dream. How many opp... (read in full...)
I'm a sex addict and now my boyfriend is angry and withholding sex from me
Q. Hi all. Im stuck in a situation that is difficult for me to talk about due to embarrassment. Im a sex addict and have been dating the same man for going on 5 years now. At first, our sex life was incredible. I thanked god for sending me a man that ...
A. 30 January 2017: Have you asked your therapist on how to approach this?... (read in full...)
Why would my co-worker buy me coffee and a muffin?
Q. Today one of my coworkers that I'm friendly with surprised me with coffee and muffin from a fast food place. I normally get to work an hour early because parking spaces are scarce--first come first serve. When I arrived, he came to my window and...
A. 30 January 2017: I think he was just trying to be nice, but personally, I would nip ANYTHING in the bud asap. Why? Because he made you FEEL uncomfortable.
I'd just stick to being polite and see what happens.... (read in full...)
I like him and enjoy his flirting. But what should I do? Because I think he has a Gf already
Q. There's this guy I'm talking too. The problem is, I think he has a girlfriend.. We've been speaking a while and a few months ago, he told me that he can't take things forward with me because he has someone. I respected that and we remained to j...
A. 30 January 2017: Sure you respect that he is in a relationship...
Sending you a dick pic was NO accident. He was testing boundaries and you jumped in with both feet.
Think about it, if he dumped his GF for you, HOW long til he was sending dick pics to other gi... (read in full...)
I still have feelings for him. He still feels the attraction too. But now he's living with another girl. How can we go forward with this?
Q. Long story but need advice. In 2013, I dated a guy for a few months. I really, really liked him but he was very keen to make the relationship official (telling everyone), which at the time I wasn't ready for, mostly because I was really poor at t...
A. 29 January 2017: I would suggest you tell him to make up his mind and contact you when or IF he becomes single and available. AS of right now he is NOT available and is "cheating" on his GF by getting emotionally re-invested in you - when he REALLY should sort out ... (read in full...)
When a person leaves their job is it OK to still maintain contact, call, and catch up with them for a drink if they are in a relationship?
Q. When someone you work with leaves is it ok to contact him by text or phone even though they have a girl fiend just to see how they are and to maintain contact. What about going for a drink to catch up. Would it make me look like a bad person? ...
A. 29 January 2017: That depends on WHY you want to keep meeting up. Do you have an ulterior motive? As in you still want to spend time with him because you have some feelings for him?
If you don't have any romantic feelings maybe suggest meeting up for drinks W... (read in full...)
I'm 39 weeks pregnant and my husband is causing me anxiety as he prefers drinking and socialising with his friends. I feel unsupported. How should I handle this?
Q. I'm 39 weeks pregnant and married for less than a year so we are pretty new. We are currently waiting for the D day and I'm extremely anxious as this is our first child. The problem is that he just isn't there for me. He prefers hanging out ...
A. 29 January 2017: Maybe it's time for you to bring out the I NEED someone reliable as WE are having a child ANY day now.
Do your parents live far from you? Of not, I would even consider staying with them til its time. And I'd tell him JUST that. Hopefull... (read in full...)
I want a prettier girlfriend who cares about being fit and healthy. What do I need to do?
Q. I want a prettier girlfriend. I've been with mine for a few years now and it seems wrong to leave. I love her but the lack of effort (exercise counts) is making me less attracted to her. Bringing it up makes me the bad guy. What should I do?...
A. 29 January 2017: Bringing it up DOES make you a "bad guy". Because you WANT her to live up to YOUR standard. Obviously either she has slacked over the years or you have changed your standards.
And you say you love her, BUT.. so you love her enough to stay (bec... (read in full...)
What should I do? Is this normal behaviour or is there more to this than she's letting on?
Q. So, I have loved my best friend of over 5 years basically since I met her. We just had one of those instant connections and became best friends the second we sat next to each other in class. Both of us went back and forth about liking each other but ...
A. 29 January 2017: The best thing you can do OP? Is block her and cut her off. WISH her well if you need to, but CUT the contact 100%.
YOU need to work on getting over her and SHE needs to focus on her relationship OR being single. EITHER. Not use you for an emoti... (read in full...)
How can I get the physical affection aspect re-started in our relationship? The cuddles have stopped.
Q. Hi everyone. I'm not sure what to do. My husband and I mostly have a great relationship, but for the last few months he seems to touch me only for sex. I like sex, but I'm starting to resent it and not want to have it when it seems to be the only...
A. 29 January 2017: Have you verbalized your needs?
Women ARE definitely bigger fans of intimacy in the form of "non-sexual" actions (such as cuddles, a hug a passing touch, a kiss) than many men are.That doesn't mean men can or should ignore those needs. Because ... (read in full...)
He has told me he no longer loves me ... but we have been happier than ever.
Q. I am having some troubles with my fiancé. I am 22 years old and we have been together for four years now, we also live together and have a mortgage on our own house. Over the pst few months he keeps saying things like "I need some space" and "I wa...
A. 29 January 2017: This isn't about you per se. (I know that might not make sense but bear with me)
You two have been together for 4 years - from your later teens to now early 20's. For some, this is a time if a LOT of maturing and growing, for other's THIS is the t... (read in full...)
I don't want to have a relationship with him but I'd like him as a friend.
Q. Me and my ex (who i've known my entire life) split up a year ago because he started to treat me bad and was showing signs of unfaithfulness. However, a year on me and him were supposedly over the relationship and he requested that we be friends. We ...
A. 29 January 2017: He isn't looking to be your friend, he is looking to USE you as a F-buddy. Someone to park his penis in when he can't find other girls to sleep around with.
Maybe in a few more years when he has GROWN up a little and matured he can be a "friend"... (read in full...)
LDR boyfriend is dragging his feet about us moving in together
Q. I am in a long distance relationship and have been for almost four years.My finance live 88 miles away so I see him every weekend. The problem is he is dragging his feet for us to live together and I have become extremely resentful.He says we can ...
A. 28 January 2017: So why are you still with him?
I don't see how his money is really any of your business. Just because you could USE some financial assistance doesn't mean as your BF he OWES you a cent.
Seems like he is making more money and is trying to be fin... (read in full...)
I'm having doubts about his ability to stay faithful
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for about 8/9 months now. He is 29 and I'm 31. He is into sex a lot and has a really high sex drive. He needs to have sex everyday plus masturbate once a day on top of that. I am not always up for sex everyday, ...
A. 28 January 2017: I think the fact that he is still a "party BOY" that smokes weed, gets drunk with his mates means he isn't perhaps the most reliable partner - does it mean he will cheat? Not really.
But IF he actively SEARCHES for prostitutes in a bar when out... (read in full...)
I'm a sex addict and now my boyfriend is angry and withholding sex from me
Q. Hi all. Im stuck in a situation that is difficult for me to talk about due to embarrassment. Im a sex addict and have been dating the same man for going on 5 years now. At first, our sex life was incredible. I thanked god for sending me a man that ...
A. 28 January 2017: Are you a "sex addict" or do you just have a high sex drive? There is a BIG difference there.
If you are an "addict" it is YOUR issue - yes, he has to live with it but he can't FIX it for you.
Are you getting counseling for the "addiction"?
... (read in full...)
Could my bf's avoidance of my compliments suggest he is cheating?
Q. I have been suspecting my bf has been unfaithful recently. Just sense a change. When having a text conversation this evening, I went on about how lucky I am to have him. What a good guy he is and how I am glad he is not like other men. I sai...
A. 28 January 2017: I agree with WiseOwl, I don't think your text was a "compliment" at all either.
If my husband "complimented me with an almost veiled threat to NOT be like his ex" I would not say THANK YOU! I don't think being compared (in any way) to an ex is a ... (read in full...)
I know we can solve any problems but he just acts distant!
Q. Hi I really need some male opinion on this, I was friends with this guy 3 years ago we started having sex without admitting that we were in a relationship which was what we both wanted at that time ( though it seemed like we had feelings for each...
A. 28 January 2017: Let him go?
The sex wasn't great and THAT is the ONLY reason he contacted you again - to get some sex. Which is why he is now distancing himself again.
There is NOT point in bending over backward for this guy OR chase him - he isn't interested... (read in full...)
Can a man go from not wanting a relationship to wanting one?
Q. was dateing a man for a few months . I told him I wanted a relationship an he then told me he didn't want one . I broke it off with him . but he still tried to keep in contact with me . so now almost two years later . he contact me we talk . he then ...
A. 28 January 2017: Either he wants sex or just to have you has a fallback option.
No, I don't think someone like that ALL of a sudden realizes that OH HE loved you SO much that he got scared and ran but now, TWO years later he is ready... Sounds like a bunch of... (read in full...)
He is much older but I want to have sex with him
Q. I knew a guy at work. I'm 22 he is 41. A very sexy man. Do u think he will have something with me after sex. We decided to be friends with benefits. He is in a relationship with a 31 years old . We planned to have sex this weekend. Do you think is ...
A. 28 January 2017: Bad bad idea.
1. He is in a relationship with a 31 years old. (you wrote so in your post) Why would you have an FWB when he ALREADY had a partner of sorts?
2. He doesn't really give a shit about anyone but himself. He thinks you are good eno... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend pathetic? Or just stuck in his life at the moment?
Q. Ok, so...my boyfriend's truck broke down this past summer and I got a car about two or three months after. He could have got another by now had he saved better but idk. He spends his money on weed mostly and his phone bill and car insurance bill ...
A. 28 January 2017: I think you (to a point) are enabling him in living this lazy-ass lifestyle where buying and smoking pot is more important than helping YOU with paying for gas and being considerate.
He is young so it's NOT totally surprising that he isn't th... (read in full...)
Do cheating married men usually have more than one mistress?
Q. Do married men who cheat, cheat with more than one mistress at a time? Or do some men stay with just one? I am interested in everybody weighing in with their opinions. ...
A. 27 January 2017: I don't think there is a yes or no answer here.
Some "only" have one at a time but do replace them as soon as they get too demanding, the novelty wears off, or as soon as the wife gets wind of an affair.
Some have only one for a very long time... (read in full...)
Suffering a workplace bully ringleader. How should I deal with this situation?
Q. Hi, this is just a work related question but it's been bugging me for a while. I feel can't speak to anyone. I have been in my role nearly a year, I love my job, get on well with all my colleagues and I am learning so much. When I started I g...
A. 27 January 2017:
Step away from the group ASAP. If anyone EVEN the "ringleader" asks why, tell them you find her crude remarks about other co-workers malicious and you rather not be part of that, even if it means not being part of the group.
And yes, I wo... (read in full...)
Could her actions in bathroom indicate that she cheated?
Q. My wife got really drunk last night and started a fight then went and douched her vag and left the bottle on the counter on accident. Now swears up and down she didn't cheat and says I'm in the wrong for accusing here. Any thoughts?...
A. 27 January 2017: What does her douching has to do with cheating?
And why should she HAVE to dice the douche bottle away in order to not be accused of cheating?
What REAL reason do you have to accuse her? Because she got drunk? Or douched? Seriously?
Sh... (read in full...)
He left me because I wouldn't have sex with him.
Q. . my partner left me. because i dnt want sex with him before marriage. but he want. thats why he leave me. he switched off his phone. but i love him. . i want to talk to him. i feel alone without him. i love him. i want to die.plz help me....
A. 27 January 2017: GOOD!
You don't want a guy who tries to pressure or manipulate you into LOWERING your standards and values. IF he is OK with pre-marital sex and you are not... YOU two are not a good match. And it really doesn't matter how much you like him. Eve... (read in full...)
8 years ago my birth brother wasn't interested, now I've found him on facebook and want to contact him.
Q. I accidentally found my birth brother on facebook a few days ago and I don't know if I should contact him or what I would even say to not freak him out. My mother gave him up for adoption 30 years ago and though we did get in touch with him 8 years ...
A. 27 January 2017: I would not contact him either. I know it's been 8 years and your mom hopes for contact, but unfortunately, it IS up to him to contact HER (or you) if that is what he wants.
I wouldn't push for contact. He is over 30 so he knows how to search f... (read in full...)
Is my mother just hurting and taking it out on me? How do I accept that nobody loves me?
Q. I'm not sure whether any of you have exactly gone through the same thing, but I feel alone in this, even though I may be irrational in thinking this and just overwhelmed by my feelings. Recently, my sibling (I'm not sure which gender specific...
A. 27 January 2017: I don't think you "made" your brother into a transgender female. I think it's more likely that he felt that way for a VERY VERY long time and hid it because of your parents. He(she) didn't tell your mom till AFTER the surgery? If I understand you ... (read in full...)
How do I tell my parents about his age and past?
Q. I need some advice on how to talk to my parents. I'm 23 and an only child. I'm very close to my parents and I know they love me very much. Ive always been a good kid and never really have my parents any trouble. I love out of town about 7 hou...
A. 27 January 2017: Before.
Don't let it be a negative situation when they meet him. They might pre-judge him, but at least he can SHOW them that they are wrong. That you two work well together.
Thye might accept it, they might not. But hiding his age and past sho... (read in full...)
He gave me deadline to talk to my ex and when things didn't work out he ended things with me
Q. I need help to figure out who is the wrong one here. I'm 39 divorced and have a 10 years old daughter. My relationship with my ex is peaceful and it's just because we have a child together. I started dating for the first time, 3 years after divorce, ...
A. 27 January 2017: I think a year is a good time to have been dating BEFORE involving a child (even a 10-year-old) and certainly, your new BF would have NO real reason to "talk" to your ex. Whatever for? To tell your ex-husband the new "rules" the new BF wants to ... (read in full...)
Wife friended EX on Facebook and it has caused issues in our marriage
Q. One evening my wife was typing on her smartphone because she got a message on Facebook. It turned out, an ex-boyfriend wanted to friend her and she asked if it was OK. I asked her if he knew she was married and she said it was on her profile, so I ...
A. 26 January 2017: I really don't think she did anything to break your trust.
She nipped his chatting her up in the bud, told him SHE talks to her husband not some blast from the past about issues, AND she blocked him, even removed Facebook from her phone.
... (read in full...)
Has anyone else dealt with something like this? My first serious girlfriend has since come out as a lesbian.
Q. I was a little bit of a late bloomer but in college I finally met a really amazing girl who became my first serious girlfriend and by that I mean that she was all my firsts: first kiss, first love, first sexual encounter. She had been with one...
A. 26 January 2017: I agree with YouWish
You didn't "make" her a lesbian. She might not even have been entirely sure about her sexuality when she dated you. Maybe she dated you because you were a good guy and she wanted "normalcy". You know? white picket fence, 1... (read in full...)
I found out my brother has been having an affair. Should I tell his wife or keep quiet?
Q. My brother has been having an affair with a single woman who is 15 years his junior. It has been ongoing for more than 3 years. I am very close to his wife and kids and accidentally found out about it last week when he sent me a text meant for h...
A. 26 January 2017: I'm with YouWish,
I would tell him: YOU tell your wife OR O do".
Give him the chance to do the right thing.... (read in full...)
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