I feel suffocated by my boyfriend! Is he controlling?
Q. I'm struggling with my boyfriends needy attitude. He wants constant reassurance from me and needs my attention all the time. We have been together 3 years and his behaviour has got worse and worse. He wants constant reassurance that I haven't felt ...
A. 10 July 2017: Gods, OP that would DRIVE me up the wall!
While I get that it's NICE being able to "always" talk to your partner... you can't even take a bubble bath without him INTRUDING? Have you ever just LOCKED the door to get some privacy?
Have you ever... (read in full...)
I don't understand his shallow attitude to me
Q. I was speaking to this guy for a few months. He seemed quite interested in me, always compliment me, ask for face pictures of me, just so sweet and lovely! We met up a few times and we eventually had sex... he complimented me during the sex (saying ...
A. 10 July 2017: He was looking for sex, nothing more.
I'm betting his shallow attitude isn't just towards you, but towards most people, he wants to sleep with and then move on to the next.
He knows how to read people and what angle to "play" to get what he w... (read in full...)
Is his request weird or not?
Q. So lemme know if this is weird or not. My boyfriend has been serious/joking with me about if I we had kids, that he'd want to drink my breast milk from my boobs. I shudder at the thought, and I can only imagine the issues women have with their ...
A. 9 July 2017: Is his request weird? I don't know, really. It's not one that makes me go EWWW (and I have breastfed 3 kids) but the issue is NOT about whether it's weird or not, it's whether it's something you would be comfortable with or not.
Perso... (read in full...)
Is she interested or a flake?
Q. Hey there, I am recently out of a relationship and ready to start dating again. Went back online and met a cool girl who I really clicked with. We messaged a few times back and forth, exchanged numbers and text quite a bit. Before our first date s...
A. 9 July 2017: If she is battling depression/anxiety she might not BE in the "right mind" (to put it bluntly) to be dating or even in a relationship.
Now, I'm not saying people with anxiety can't date or be with someone but they HAVE to be able to have enough c... (read in full...)
Why won't he do what he used to offer me in bed?
Q. Basically, me and my partner got together in 2012. We're engaged now and have two kids so our relationship is serious. I'm 23 and he's 27. When we met we did start off at friends with benefits for about 6 months before becoming bf gf. Anyway, in the ...
A. 7 July 2017: You CAN go the rest of your life without oral. There is no healthwise reason WHY you can't.
You just DON'T want to go the rest of your life without oral.
BIG difference.
I have to ask WHY is it now such a big deal - 6 years later? Obviously... (read in full...)
Why is she so inconsistent with what she wants?
Q. I've been with this girl for about 8 months now. Everything has been good between us until about a month ago.. I moved in with her last month and now somethings are starting to bother me. She's very inconsistent with what she wants. She works...
A. 7 July 2017: What was her reason in NOT go to family functions with you?
Maybe she just isn't ready for the whole family thing yet. Is she out to her own family and friends?
As for working overtime or two jobs, well some people like the money, hate the ... (read in full...)
I think he's been swapping explicit pics of me!
Q. I need some advice and don't normally do this but I've been with this guy for nearly 2 years and had a gut feeling he's been up to somthing odd! I logged into his emails today and found messages between him and a random person on cragslist asking ...
A. 7 July 2017: My advice?
FORWARD the email with ALL the details to your own e-mail account (before he deletes it). Then you CALL the LOCAL police station and ASK them what you can do, ask for help.
I would also suggest that IF he has ANY of your pics on his... (read in full...)
Step daughter doesn't want the step family moving into Dad's house!
Q. My boyfriend has a 10 year old daughter with his ex, I have a 8 year old from a previous relationship, and when we first got together our girls got on well. We have been together for 2 years, and recently we started thinking about moving in ...
A. 7 July 2017: Maybe it's time to find a NEW house? One with 3 bedrooms so NEITHER girl HAVE to share space and their things. If selling HIS house and buying a new one, isn't an option CLEAR out that spare room for YOUR daughter. For BOTH girl's sake. Your ... (read in full...)
What to expect in relationship after 10 years?
Q. Hi, I need some perspective on my relationship. I want to know if it is expected that after 10 years should romance fade? Should I still be feeling lovey dovey or should I just be feeling bland and monotonous? Should I still be excited? Does ...
A. 7 July 2017: I think if you are unhappy there is ONLY one person to discuss this with and that is your partner. I completely agree with N91.
What people (OTHER PEOPLE) post on Facebook is absolutely irrelevant. That is their life (or a rather represen... (read in full...)
Help me understand these people! I'm feeling hurt and confused!
Q. Hi I broke up with my husband in October and met someone I'm work after. It was a whirl wind and I was vulnerable. The man was charming told me I was wonderful promised me the world. I fell for it hook line and sinker. I found out he lived w...
A. 7 July 2017: You are focusing on the "wrong end of the stick here" SHE isn't/wasn't the problem. HE was. How he treated HER and how he treated YOU.
Be glad that you are no longer with him and no longer part of his little drama-llama circus. Seriousl... (read in full...)
Have you ever lied to someone about your feelings for them?
Q. Dear cupid, I'd like to know if anyone has ever lied to a friend of the opposite sex about whether or not you have feelings for them? If so, what was the reason? Did you feel you had to lie because of circumstance? I have a male friend, we talk ...
A. 7 July 2017: He was trying to make you feel better.
If he has deeper feelings for you, NOW is not the time to DO anything about it. YOU have a partner.
So IF you are miserable with your partner and it's nothing something that can be worked on, maybe you ne... (read in full...)
How do I deal with creepy older men?
Q. I live in a small rich town where there are a LOT of people in their 50s and 60s, I'm here because it's cheaper and nicer than the nearby city. I'm a female student in my 20s. I get hit on regularly by older guys (I'm talking the ones in the 50s ...
A. 7 July 2017: If you can, you ignore and walk away.
If you are in a place where you can't walk away, (like at work) just be polite and ignore. If they say things that are INAPPROPRIATE (not just trying to chat you up) SAY it loudly. "Sir, you are being inapprop... (read in full...)
How can I deal with bad female bosses
Q. A year ago I was working for a large publicly held company - when they hired a senior manager and let go my original manager that hired me. As soon as she started working no more than two months in the job she started criticizing my work- micro ...
A. 7 July 2017: It was ONE person you have had a bad experience with. Just like "not all men" there is a "not all women bosses".
You might GET another boss like that, you might not. But if you don't get out there and TRY and find a good job (one where you feel... (read in full...)
Should I back of and give her time to deal with things?
Q. So for the past month or so I've been sleeping with this girl I know through mutual friends. We always have a lot of fun together when we hang out. She's just getting out of a seven year relationship and is currently in the process of moving out of ...
A. 7 July 2017: We are like cats? lol
Part, from that I agree with Denizen. IF you care for her then don't push for sex and intimacy. YOU aren't a couple and she needs a friend more. And you don't WANT to just be friends (understandable).
Trouble is wh... (read in full...)
Hes been exchanging suggestive messages with an ex ... should I break up with him?
Q. A few months ago, my boyfriend and I argued over a woman that he had been making sexual comments with on facebook. He said that he was joking, but I didn't think it was funny. She said she had a soft spot for him, then he mentioned a "hard spot" , ...
A. 7 July 2017: I think if that conversation had you feel so miserable that you had to contact mental health, then he isn't for you. It seems like it's a pattern of behavior with him to flirt with women he has had a past with. And I don't think he will stop that, ... (read in full...)
Online dating. He's not just chatting to me. Should I start chatting to others?
Q. Online dating. I've had both good and bad experiences doing this . I've been chatting with a guy for a couple of week and we are meeting in a few days for our first date . He's told me the lines how he's hoping i'm the one and what he hopes will h...
A. 6 July 2017: I agree with Janniepeg.
If you FEEL more comfortable talking to one guy at a time, then do that. What he does or doesn't do, at this time, is irrelevant. However, it might also serve as a caution to take things VERY slow and if things progress... (read in full...)
I'm not sure if I should go on a third date with him!
Q. I recently met a guy on a dating app and we have gone on two dates. We spoke once over the phone for two hours and he doesn't really text and doesn't call me at all. However, he is always making plans ahead by asking me at the end of each date when ...
A. 6 July 2017: Are interested IN him?
Because that is the point of dating someone, getting to know them better. And while I can see the logic in talking IN person to get to know one another, if texting is "the norm" for you to keep in touch and talk here and... (read in full...)
He's asking about people I've slept within the past 2 years!
Q. I've recently got into a relationship with a guy i've been seeing on and off for a long time. We've only been together a couple of months officially but he's began to ask about people i've slept with over the past two years. He's quite insecure as ...
A. 6 July 2017: I'd be honest and tell him that you don't WANT to discuss your past sex life with him because you don't see it HELPING the relationship AT ALL. NOR do you want to hear about his past sex life.
TELL him it makes you uncomfortable. Either he will ... (read in full...)
Does this mean he just wants casual sex?
Q. There's this guy who used to work with my dad, who's a few year younger than me but we seemed to get on. Every time I went into his work (a pub) he seemed to be having the usual barman banter and fun with me (sometimes he'd go a little further ...
A. 5 July 2017: Yep. I think he has sensed that you at least COULD be receptive to some casual sex so he put it out there. He might do that to ANY girl he finds attractive and who seems to like him.
Having banter doesn't mean automatically that you are looking ... (read in full...)
Why is everyone sceptical about a 'friends with benefits' arrangement?
Q. So a while back me and my friend had sex a couple of times. We actually live in a shared house with other people, although they don't know that anything happened between us. We had known each other for about a year before this happened, and had ...
A. 5 July 2017: I think "Freinds with benefits" works and CAN work JUST fine till someone catches feelings. And that will happen. Why? Because it's a pretty "natural" progression to WANT more.
Like LDR (long distance relationships) FWB's have an expirati... (read in full...)
Who do I help, the one who relies on me or myself?
Q. I have a strained relationship with my girlfriend of five years. There's a lot of love and care there. She'll shower me with it, thank me and bless me. She has me on a pedestal and I shelter her from life. There's a lot of love but I feel trapped. ...
A. 5 July 2017: You do you.
You are in a loving way ENABLING her to NOT get her shit together. I know the intention was to help her get on feet but in 5 years that hasn't happened because SHE had you. She doesn't HAVE to really get on her feet.
I can imagine... (read in full...)
She says he wants to groom me. What is that?
Q. What does it mean when a man is grooming a women? What is it he is grooming her for? Is this a form of manipulation if so then why? I was seeing n (and) (sic) talking lots to with a guy a really like and I left cause he beat his ex' others say. ...
A. 5 July 2017: I think what your friend means is that he will put on his "nice guy" facade to make you think that him hitting an ex-GF was a one-off not a pattern of behavior.
Or that he is LOOKING for a woman who is vulnerable like his ex-GF who might put up w... (read in full...)
I feel like I am a mistake and that everybody knows it!
Q. Am i stupid, or just living in the past. I am gay and i don't think i have ever said that before. i have always been scared and think of other peoples feelings rather then my own. I avoid social situations and even family stuff because everybody is ...
A. 4 July 2017: Most of us are "mistakes" (so to speak) but YOU are here and have been for a while. I'm here too. And so are MILLIONS of other people. There is a BIG chance that MANY of these millions weren't planned. Doesn't mean they ae really a MISTAKE or not ... (read in full...)
We want to get married but boyfriend has too many irons in the fire going!
Q. Dear Cupid, I've asked a similar question before but I think I'm going to ask it in a different way since I have a little more insight for what's going on. My boyfriend wants to get married after finishing his renovation projects. But when I say pr...
A. 4 July 2017: THIS is who he is.
THIS is the guy YOU fell in love with.
It's a man that doesn't sit on his ass hoping the money gets handed to him. Instead, he flips houses. Hopefully, he is GOOD at it too and actually makes a profit, if not... meeh.
... (read in full...)
My partner promises he'll be around for my son and then disappears. This is the 4th time he's done this
Q. My partner has disappeared for the 4 time now after promising my son he'll be around n that how can I tell my don that his left again n the only thing I got was that his sorry dose it mean that his left me for good or his he playing away ...
A. 4 July 2017: If he has done this 4 times already, HOW many times do you think it will take before you accept that he is NOT going to keep his promise of always being around?
He might MEAN that he will be around when he says it, but that doesn't mean he will ... (read in full...)
Does looking at those websites means cheating
Q. Hello everyone, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and we have been living together for a year. We are both 26 yesterday, I borrowed his phone ( with permission) and saw he was on Craigslist looking at w4m in our city. After that I loo...
A. 3 July 2017: While I don't agree with installing tracking stuff and goodness knows what else on partner's tech... I can kind of understand where you came from and why you did it. You wanted UNDISPUTED "proof" that he was in fact lying and you got it.
Had h... (read in full...)
Her comments have me wondering if she's into me or not?
Q. I've started talking to this girl a lot over the last week and we've hung out quite a bit. We have made plans to go for dinner, she also asked if I'd like to go away to Madrid for a couple of days next week. Today when we were together for a quick ...
A. 3 July 2017: Just going by that little "snippet" fo a conversation I'd say she isn't INTO you romantically. I think she regards you more as a friendly face.
I'd NEVER "critique" good looking guys in front of someone I was interested in romantically. It seems... (read in full...)
Do men lose out on any pleasure by using condoms?
Q. Hi Aunts. I've met this amazing guy and we have been chatting for a while, he is going at a slow pace with me :)he is kind, understanding and says he is very much in love with me, I feel the same. I can trust him and I think he's perfect for me ...
A. 3 July 2017: The pill is not for everyone. And that is the truth. I suggest YOU buy some condoms to bring as well, that way the whole - I forgot or whatnot can't happen.
Do men lose out? I do think it hinders SOME of the pleasure but I don't think it's com... (read in full...)
Why can't I let go of somebody who had let go before it even started?
Q. I'm so confused with myself and am hoping the advice from unbiased people will help my heart a bit. Last April I started dating someone who was an acquitance for 10 years before that. I fell head over heels and really thought we would work out. ...
A. 3 July 2017: I agree with YCBS, you don't want to let go of the FANTASY guy you build him up to be. That charming full of life, funny man who DOESN'T exist.
You can't let go because that means you have to own up to your own behavior. Fighting after 3 months t... (read in full...)
She strung me along to cancel three times ...
Q. Hello everyone, so about 2 years ago I was in a short film with an actress and we hit it off really well, great chemistry. There was a kissing scene but it wasn't awkward at all. She even suggested "practice kissing" during rehearsal. However, ...
A. 3 July 2017: I too would leave this one be.
She MIGHT have been sick for the first date - I'll give her that but she was the one who suggested the time/date for the second and third. Which means sheSHOULD have checked if she was actually FREE (IF she had want... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wont make an effort for me.
Q. Hi, I asked my boyfriend several times if he would go with me to the beach and he has always said no. Last time I asked he said that he would think about it, so I rushed to prepare our stuff and then I ask him again he says no! This happens ...
A. 2 July 2017: Tell him OK, I'm going and then GO by yourself or call a friend. You two are dating not attached at the hip.
And if you ONE day don't feel like going where HE wants to go tell HIM no.
I take my kids (teens) to the beach quite often. In the pa... (read in full...)
I am still breast feeding my school aged child
Q. I do not see a problem with this however I wondered what the general consensus would be .... I am breastfeeding an almost 7 year old? I am quite out spoken about breastfeeding but a side from close family and friends, no one knows that we are still ...
A. 2 July 2017: As a woman who has breastfed 3 children, I'd say I speak from experience of sorts.
A child will NATURALLY disengage the nursing themselves once they start on solid foods, start being mobile (walk/crawling) and once the breastmilk STOP being a ... (read in full...)
Hiking partner blows hot and cold! What should my next move be?
Q. I fell for a guy 12 years old than me who was at my hiking group. Over the years we have had a rocky relationship where he would show me interest but would serial date other people. As a result I would ignore him as I was hurt and then he would get ...
A. 2 July 2017: I think you have unrealistic expectations of this guy. He is doing the "serial dating" because he CAN'T do REAL relationships.
It's not about the woman but HIS own shortcomings.
You say he is 12 years older than you so somewhere in his... (read in full...)
What is the correct protocol for children that don't live at home and being invited out with us?
Q. I have a question for other blended families, I have two kids ages 12 and 7 and my fiance has two kids 22 and 18. The 22 and 18 year old live with their boyfriends and my children live with me and my fiance. Here is the question. When planning...
A. 1 July 2017: Talk to your partner. This is really between HIM and YOU.
IF YOU are the one PAYING for the Disney trip, YOU get to choose who goes.
I have to my parents took a vacation every OTHER year alone without us kids. We spend the time with one of our ... (read in full...)
Does looking at those websites means cheating
Q. Hello everyone, I have been with my boyfriend for 2 years now and we have been living together for a year. We are both 26 yesterday, I borrowed his phone ( with permission) and saw he was on Craigslist looking at w4m in our city. After that I loo...
A. 1 July 2017: So if he is "just" curious it's somehow OK?
That is something YOU have to decide if it is or not in YOUR relationship.
The fact that he has PAID for sexual acts in the past doesn't exactly speak in his favor. IMHO.
I DO think there are peopl... (read in full...)
Why is my girlfriend so stubborn about her size and weight?
Q. Why is my girlfriend so stubborn about her size and weight? When we met she was in great shape, she used to wear nice dresses and clothes. However last few years because of her rubbish diet and lack of excersise its showing. I ignored it for 2 ...
A. 30 June 2017: I agree with YouWish.
DO you. If YOU want to be fit and healthy GO for it. The sooner you get started on a GOOD routine the sooner it will PAY OFF for you. IF she starts to whine about her weight or dress sizes BE honest. Tell her that SHE is t... (read in full...)
He always manages to bring up sex in a conversation. Is he just horny? Or does he want something from me?
Q. There is this guy I know. We are friends, but fairly new friends for the past 3 or so months. He is a really nice guy, very easy to talk to. Whenever we talk, he always tells me personal things about himself. I'm talking really personal things that ...
A. 30 June 2017: I fully agree too. YouWish nailed it.
Sounds like the "sharing" of REALLY personal stuff is his way to make you feel you are getting to know him and trust him... I'd chill on that aspect a bit.
Are you INTERESTED in him as anything more th... (read in full...)
Is a man without a big wallet a deal breaker for you?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have recently met a great man. We've been dating for a few months but we have met each other's parents because we are serious about each other. Recently though, my worries have been our financial status. He is a hard working chef a...
A. 30 June 2017: Not for me, no.
If he was lazy or didn't WANT to work, it would be an issue but if he pursuing something he loves to do with a lower income than he potentially COULD earn in another job, I have no issue there.
You have to figure out how Y... (read in full...)
Do you think my ex-roommate will want to date me again if I put zero pressure on him?
Q. So I dated my roommate for a year. It never progressed very far because every time I put pressure on him (which I have a habit of doing) he freaked out and pulled away. We really liked each other though so I always assumed the problem was living ...
A. 30 June 2017: I think the mistake here is YOU not realizing what he is saying. IT wasn't the "pressure" you put on him, it was the EXPECTATIONS.
You want to date and be a couple, HE doesn't. THAT is pretty obvious.
When someone says, I just want use to BE f... (read in full...)
Things changed when my BFF got a girlfriend.
Q. I'm really hurt. My best friend C and I have been bffs for 5 years. We've had our share of ups and downs, but always managed to get through it and remain close as we were before. He'd been into me, like, majorly into me for 2 years. He said he was ...
A. 29 June 2017: I say no, leave him be.
He is NO friend to you and sorry to burst your bubble OP, he doesn't love you either. The way he treated you when he met HER (while "trying" to be with you) that doesn't SHOW love. saying "ILY" doesn't MAKE it true. He... (read in full...)
He wants to record us having oral sex and then send it to a friend?
Q. Been seeing a guy right, everything was great.. Until he asked me a few days ago to let him record himself giving me "oral" in the not so usual place..to send to his guy friend! Is this relationship between them normal? Do guys do this with their ...
A. 29 June 2017: He is 44? That just makes it weirder and a bit creepy!! I can see a youngster wanting to egg friends on or BRAG/ make stupid bets... but a 44-year-old? Just no.
ALWAYS listen to your gut. When something seems "too good to be true" or just plain "N... (read in full...)
He wants to record us having oral sex and then send it to a friend?
Q. Been seeing a guy right, everything was great.. Until he asked me a few days ago to let him record himself giving me "oral" in the not so usual place..to send to his guy friend! Is this relationship between them normal? Do guys do this with their ...
A. 28 June 2017: Oh no no no no no.
Why would he need to do that? And what do you think will happen with that recording after he sends it? How many other guys will it be distributed to? And if you two break up how will you know it won't be on some website without ... (read in full...)
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