I feel I shouldn't move in til he sorts his children's visitation issue.
Q. I have been dating my bf for 2 years now. we live separately for the moment he has his home and I have mine. He has asked me to move in his home but, I have declined at the moment for this story I will tell. he has 3 children 9,10 and 18. I have ...
A. 9 January 2018: The lawyer might go a certain route - a "let's try and do this in a gentle way" before pulling out the alienating of the dad. That part is more for a judge to hear.
The thing is that the kids at 9 and 10 (the 18 year old can do what she/he w... (read in full...)
My ex still loves me but I don't want to hurt my current boyfriend.
Q. I suddenly met my ex in a wedding a month ago. He still loves me the same and love me though he know I'm in a new relationship. He always treated me a way far better than my present one. I don't want to hurt anyone. But I'm stuckedin between two. ...
A. 6 January 2018: Again, choose neither.
You and your ex-BF didn't work out. There is a reason for that.
Your current and you aren't working out either, so end it. And end it nicely (don't offer friendship or anything like that just let him know you don't feel y... (read in full...)
How do I stop feeling inadequate?
Q. Ever since I was little, I was always in my older siblings shadow. I've healed a lot, but I still find myself inadequate compared to their successes despite having my own. I was always compared, sibling has a better social life, higher education, ...
A. 5 January 2018: I totally understand how you feel, but I would TRY and look at it from a different perspective. When your parents rave about your siblings, it's probably more out of PRIDE (in their offspring) rather than wanting to put you down.
My dad and I ta... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants sex on demand, what about what I want?
Q. I love my boyfriend we been together nearly a year but he always wants sex in the morning and I just don't and if I don't have it when he wants he gets into a strop all day and just walks off and if we go out he will just walk miles in front of me ...
A. 5 January 2018: Since talking to him doesn't seem to work, maybe you need to consider that the compatibility just isn't there.
A guy who ONLY thinks of getting HIS rocks off, who throws fits when you are not feeling up to sex - that's a BAD fit for you. (for any... (read in full...)
I don't want to regret the chance to reconnect with him again.. what do I do?
Q. About 2 years ago I fell in love with a guy I hae met on an online gaming site and we use to talk literally everyday for hours about a year and a half. I really wanted to keep in touch but I was at a really bad stage in my life. I dealt with severe ...
A. 5 January 2018: I think the best thing you can do is leave him be. You have both grown (hopefully in those two years).
He cut you off because you were playing games and he didn't like it. Nothing wrong in that. He didn't cut you off to hurt you but to keep him... (read in full...)
He's in jail, should I tell him how I feel?
Q. So, back in March 2017 I started meeting with a guy I’ve liked for ages! We met about 4 years ago because he is my cousins best friend and so he attended a lot of family events and things like that. We have flirted with each other for a long time ...
A. 5 January 2018: Like I said in my first answer,
"For me personally, I think it depends on what he did."
One thing is doing something stupid like driving without a license (or before your license is valid) but that is the whole story, it seems like there is a ... (read in full...)
Do I contact him over this rude breakup?
Q. I got in from work to find a email off my boyfriend saying because I'm not an animal person (he has a cat) it won't work out. I have a cat myself. He has blocked me off everything and I don’t know why so I can’t ask him. I knew he was having a few ...
A. 5 January 2018: The whole "cat issue" was just the best excuse he could muster when dumping you.
If this guy has mental health issues it might be that he just can't really deal with a relationship right now and someone like that is not going to to admit to that.... (read in full...)
Can I really believe her?
Q. I was looking through my GF text messages one night because I felt something was different lately with her. So I found a text from a guy that she worked with. The text started out as I hear you are leaving the company for a new job and continued ...
A. 5 January 2018: So what was her REAL reason for talking about meeting up overnight, when she no longer works for the company? What is the REAL context here?
Could she just have been polite instead of saying no I don't think my partner would like that?
One thi... (read in full...)
I have no idea what I'm doing when it comes to dating and would just like any advice
Q. The question I have is the most simple question, that probably every man has asked himself at one point or another. How do I meet women? I have tried online dating and it hasn't favored well for me. It seems that whenever I get a match, the conve...
A. 5 January 2018: Nothing wrong in not wanting to date. Some people prefer being on their own.
Just don't try and date when you are "desperate"... Date when you FEEL a need for a partner. Someone to SHARE life, experiences, memories, good and bad times with. No... (read in full...)
Behavior towards my ex girlfriend who cheated and lied, did I act good?
Q. So I'm 19 year old guy and I was in a relationship with a cute girl, she's 17. After a month she dumps me over text. She was even planning for us to go to the gym together. 2 weeks later I found out out that she has cheated on me and got in a rel...
A. 4 January 2018: I wouldn't go out of my way to snub her. I get that feels good and that you don't owe her crap. Just don't try "too" hard to "pretend" to ignore her. Instead, JUST ignore her.
And yeah, I think you did good. I actually like that you called h... (read in full...)
How do I stop feeling inadequate?
Q. Ever since I was little, I was always in my older siblings shadow. I've healed a lot, but I still find myself inadequate compared to their successes despite having my own. I was always compared, sibling has a better social life, higher education, ...
A. 4 January 2018: We all have things we are good at.
My older brother is WAY more successful than I ever was, he had WAY more drive and ambition. He was always better at sports. We both have decent amount of education. I have two bachelors, he has a masters.... (read in full...)
I feel I shouldn't move in til he sorts his children's visitation issue.
Q. I have been dating my bf for 2 years now. we live separately for the moment he has his home and I have mine. He has asked me to move in his home but, I have declined at the moment for this story I will tell. he has 3 children 9,10 and 18. I have ...
A. 4 January 2018: Honestly?
I think you need to stay out of it.
I get that you are on the side line watching all this but HE needs to DO this and HE needs to work through with a lawyer on what is BEST for the kids.
It does sound like she is using the kids an... (read in full...)
He's in jail, should I tell him how I feel?
Q. So, back in March 2017 I started meeting with a guy I’ve liked for ages! We met about 4 years ago because he is my cousins best friend and so he attended a lot of family events and things like that. We have flirted with each other for a long time ...
A. 4 January 2018: I wouldn't tell him just yet.. again, what is the hurry?
You think he is going to be looking at other girls?
And I agree with the two anon posters who mention that 18 months is a lot for a first offence driving without a licence.
LINK... (read in full...)
He's in jail, should I tell him how I feel?
Q. So, back in March 2017 I started meeting with a guy I’ve liked for ages! We met about 4 years ago because he is my cousins best friend and so he attended a lot of family events and things like that. We have flirted with each other for a long time ...
A. 4 January 2018: Alright, that is a start.
So he was not making good choices. That might be about maturity more than smarts. Hopefully he will learn from this.
If you feel this guy is a GOOD fit for you (and I mean that you two share more in common than havi... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin but I want to have casual sex with him. How do I ask for him without coming across as cheap?
Q. So, I work with this guy and we get along well together. He not necessarily physically my type but his personality os great. He is funny and makes me laugh and even when we get on eachother nerves we still laugh. I feel comfortable and at ease with ...
A. 4 January 2018: Why would you want casual sex for your first time? Why? And why is this guy relegated in your mind to a "casual fuck" only?
I do agree with the uncles who say don't "eat where you crap" - don't date where you work and SURELY do NOT have casual s... (read in full...)
I have no idea what I'm doing when it comes to dating and would just like any advice
Q. The question I have is the most simple question, that probably every man has asked himself at one point or another. How do I meet women? I have tried online dating and it hasn't favored well for me. It seems that whenever I get a match, the conve...
A. 4 January 2018: I agree with N91,
Don't try Tindr and those kind of hook-up sites. Some (but very few) get a decent match but mostly it's all about hooking up and nothing more. Bars and clubs can be a bit of the same too.
Maybe look into meetup groups. A... (read in full...)
He's in jail, should I tell him how I feel?
Q. So, back in March 2017 I started meeting with a guy I’ve liked for ages! We met about 4 years ago because he is my cousins best friend and so he attended a lot of family events and things like that. We have flirted with each other for a long time ...
A. 4 January 2018: For me personally, I think it depends on what he did.
When you think about it, him going to jail and having a criminal record can seriously hamper his future.
Also how much older than you is he? Is this his first conviction?
You are 18-21 s... (read in full...)
My new wife sunbathes topless and I've seen other men looking
Q. We are in honeymoon. My wife did topless tanning in a beach with a lot of people. I dont feel so comfortable with this so I discussed with her. She didnt like it and she told me that I am jealous and that she did it only for tanning. I accepted it ...
A. 4 January 2018: Well, OP
I'm Danish (living in the US) so I grew up with nude and topless beaches back home. And it's just not a big deal to me. It's a body. A semi naked body. I'm not saying YOU have to feel that way too, I'm sure there is a bit of cultural... (read in full...)
My new wife sunbathes topless and I've seen other men looking
Q. We are in honeymoon. My wife did topless tanning in a beach with a lot of people. I dont feel so comfortable with this so I discussed with her. She didnt like it and she told me that I am jealous and that she did it only for tanning. I accepted it ...
A. 4 January 2018: I don't have a GF, I have a husband.
He can go topless ALL he wants in summer, for all I care. His body, his choice. I can't do the same (not while living in the US) as it is considered indecent exposure.
And I get that you don't want other... (read in full...)
Should I ask my co-worker out? Or is she a gold digger?
Q. Hello, The thing is I'm getting mixed signals from a female coworker. She said once that she doesn't like quiet guys (like me), or fat guys (also like me), but recently she seems much more eager to talk to me about random stuff (but she does spe...
A. 4 January 2018: I'd ignore her little "hints".
Don't date coworkers. Single or not, find a woman to date that you don't also work with.
Also, she doesn't seem like a "Keeper". Someone who has to be chastised by her Boss for flirting and chatting up a ha... (read in full...)
The ex is bad mouthing me to another man. Why would he do this?
Q. Around five months ago for God knows why the guy I was currently going out with ended the relationship with me saying it was too much and the break up was not mutual. I still have him on social media and he has supposedly assumed I've moved on with ...
A. 3 January 2018: Nope, I can't read your ex's mind.
He might feel that he somehow still have a "right" to control your life even if he didn't want to date you any more.
CUT the ex off from all contact, all social media and phone. WHY would you keep such a guy ... (read in full...)
My question is should I follow my heart and keep seeing her because I feel great in her company or should I cut my losses now?
Q. So I've been living in Spain for a few months and I met a local girl and we really hit it off the first night. I tried to meet up with her again but she said she just wanted to be friends because she liked a German guy she met a few weeks ago but he ...
A. 3 January 2018: She doesn't know what she wants, but she DOES know it's not you. That is why you are in a "holding pattern" with her and why she is also having sex with one guy and chasing that German one. You are the second option (or third)
I think you are bett... (read in full...)
Uh Oh! My girlfriend and I are related!
Q. My girlfriend and I are related, found out after 30 years but are great great grandparents are cousins??..I love her to death and we have a 4 month year old daughter but what should we do?...
A. 3 January 2018: That would make you what 5th or 6th (I think) cousins at best which means there is PLENTY of genetic material in between for it not to be incestuous AT ALL.
Now if you are both carriers of "negative" recessive and dominant genetically, consider... (read in full...)
My new wife sunbathes topless and I've seen other men looking
Q. We are in honeymoon. My wife did topless tanning in a beach with a lot of people. I dont feel so comfortable with this so I discussed with her. She didnt like it and she told me that I am jealous and that she did it only for tanning. I accepted it ...
A. 3 January 2018: You live on Cypress?
First off, GORGEOUS island!! Been twice (long time ago) and enjoyed the sun and the lovely food!
Cypress is full of Scandinavian and British tourist - who ALL like to sunbathe topless, it's kind of no big deal and my gues... (read in full...)
Boyfriend wants sex on demand, what about what I want?
Q. I love my boyfriend we been together nearly a year but he always wants sex in the morning and I just don't and if I don't have it when he wants he gets into a strop all day and just walks off and if we go out he will just walk miles in front of me ...
A. 3 January 2018: I think your BF have been through relationships where the sex died and he doesn't want ANOTHER relationship without sex... However, his behavior is KILLING your desire for sex with him, stone dead.
I would tell him that. While sex is a huge par... (read in full...)
What does it mean when guys say that you're different and ambiguous?
Q. Whenever i date a guy, he always tells me that im unfamiliar,rare,different and ambiguous. There are basically 4 guys that i have dated and im not very interested in them anymore, but they keep chasing and one of them told me that im *addictive*. ...
A. 3 January 2018: If a guy calls you addictive it's not about YOU, it's about him. You like being compared to crack? cocaine? gambling? any other vice?
And using words like "unfamiliar,rare,different and ambiguous." is a way to make you believe they see you as s... (read in full...)
Why would he trust me in a short time?
Q. I recently started talking to a guy in a dating site. We've been calling and and texting for days now and we talk non stop. He told me that i was the person he was looking for all his life, we talk about everything. He told me that some personal ...
A. 3 January 2018: Some people use it as a manipulation trick and it WORKS more than it fails.
Let's say YOU and I are getting to know each other. I know I am not the biggest "prize" out there but if I get you talking long enough you might bond with me, you might fe... (read in full...)
I'm extremely hurt that he doesn't believe I'm contributing enough!
Q. Hello everyone, I am a full time student with the occasional summer internship. I am studying a very rigorous major and while I've been in school for 3 years, it will take at least another two for me to finish my bachelors degree. I am a very good...
A. 2 January 2018: Sit him down and talk about his post.
I think it's FAIR enough of him to feel the way he does, to be honest. You are dating, NOT married so in reality he shouldn't be responsible for YOUR living expenses - regardless of how rigorous your major is... (read in full...)
I'm worried about the looks I will get if I buy condoms
Q. Hi all, Recently, I got together with a guy and well, our relationship has been moving fairly quickly. I absolutely okay with how it's going. So, I was just wondering, he will coming to visit me at my own place (I live near my uni campus), and lik...
A. 2 January 2018: Just go to a pharmacy away from where you normally shop. Trust me you MIGHT get looks from strangers but SO what? It beats getting pregnant or getting STD's, right?
People might look at you for buy red lipstick or blue hair dye, so what?
... (read in full...)
Why didn't my ex have the courtesy to tell me he was getting married and having a child?
Q. Hi Everyone, I could use some advice. I'm having a difficult time coping with my ex boyfriend getting married and having a daughter. He was married in August and continue to see me casually until one day I found out he was married with a d...
A. 2 January 2018: You are MUCH better of without this guy.
Maybe knowing how he used you and betrayed his wife will make it easier to move forward.
Block him on everything. Don't even consider being "friends".
When you say you were aggressive towards him, ... (read in full...)
My husband just can't stop grilling me about my ex and it's getting out of control now
Q. Hi. I am 26 and just got married. I have known him from my school time. And we dated for 1 year untill we got married. He was always curious to know details about my past relationships. I had a boyfriend before him and it lasted for 3 years. My ...
A. 2 January 2018: Why are you still talking to the ex?
And if you aren't talking to the ex anymore WHY do you still have old conversations?
What I think you HAVE to do is cut OFF the ex-Bf from your life. YOU chose to marry someone else and THAT is where your pr... (read in full...)
No sex in 3 years! Is he gay? Am I just a cover?
Q. i've been seeing this guy for three years now I only see him on a Saturday till sunday, some times not even that we haven't had any sexual relationship yet sleep in the same bed , he said he don't think about sex ever , yet I found Viagra an durex ...
A. 2 January 2018: I agree with YCBS
It doesn't MATTER if he is gay. YOU are not fulfilled by this relationship and you aren't happy about it either.
When a relationship turns into a "quest" where one partner has to "discover" the TRUTH about the other... love go... (read in full...)
Can you get pregnant the day before your period starts?
Q. Is their any chance to get pregnency, on before day of my periods? Is it is safe sex?...
A. 2 January 2018: http://www.momjunction.com/articles/useful-methods-calculate-safe-period-avoid-pregnancy_0091253/#gref
However, it is MUCH safer to use BIRTH CONTROL such as condoms etc. Condoms can also prevent the spread of STD's not just pregnancies.... (read in full...)
How do you kill all hope after a breakup?
Q. My ex and I were together over a year,. And broke up 2 weeks ago. We spent 8 months face to face, and nearly a year apart. He told me the distance was a big factor, but that he also felt 'unsure' about our compatability and wanted to think. I told ...
A. 2 January 2018: There you go, OP
Working through it :) Yes, being angry (for a little while is OK too) So is being disappointed, sad, etc. Just don't wallow in it. You and he weren't meant to be. You can't know that when you first meet. We find that out over tim... (read in full...)
I get an erection during foreplay but lose it during sex. What do I do about it?
Q. Every time I try to have sex with my girlfriend i instantly get hard during foreplay but as soon as I am ready to have full sex I lose my erection I don't know what to do I love her very much and want to please her sexually ...
A. 2 January 2018: Then go back to pleasing her. Get her rocks off, watch her and my guess is you will get hard again.
80% of women DO NOT (and I will repeat for the boys in the back) DO NOT climax from penetrative sex. So what does that mean? IT MEANS your skills a... (read in full...)
My boyfriend suffers from ptsd. Do I give him ultimatums?
Q. Yesterday i hoped i would see in the new year with my boyfriend but didnt , reason being he had been in hospital ( for a week ) over christmas because of his ptsd ( which i was aware of before we got together ) and was let out yesterday evening. He ...
A. 2 January 2018: I'm sorry OP, I think you have to accept that the future or life you had HOPED for with this guy is not going to match reality.
He really is in NO condition to be dating. He really SHOULD focus on his mental health.
I think you were being a goo... (read in full...)
How do I get back on my feet? Can I turn my life around?
Q. how do I get back on my feet - can this be done? Three years ago I hung out with the in crowd and got myself in financial debt - I was making money and also spending money - long story short I got unexpectedly laid off and I had to move back home . ...
A. 2 January 2018: California is expensive. One of THE most expensive states if you aren't rich. (Hawaii might also be expensive - on goods they have to import, like milk and other day to day items but the day to day life there is no insanely expensive compared.) ... (read in full...)
Why didn't my ex have the courtesy to tell me he was getting married and having a child?
Q. Hi Everyone, I could use some advice. I'm having a difficult time coping with my ex boyfriend getting married and having a daughter. He was married in August and continue to see me casually until one day I found out he was married with a d...
A. 2 January 2018: Oh and.. forgot to mention that he OWES the courtesy to tell his wife he is still seeing his ex (you), he doesn't owe you squat.
(again UNLESS he claimed to be single when still seeing you) Then he is just an asshat.... (read in full...)
Why didn't my ex have the courtesy to tell me he was getting married and having a child?
Q. Hi Everyone, I could use some advice. I'm having a difficult time coping with my ex boyfriend getting married and having a daughter. He was married in August and continue to see me casually until one day I found out he was married with a d...
A. 2 January 2018: Did you know he had a partner?
If you did and STILL saw him maybe he didn't think you would care. Seeing a guy with a GF or a wife is kind of the same to me. If a dude has a partner - he should be off limits.
If you didn't, well then learn ... (read in full...)
He used me then broke up with me. Should I ask him to give back the gifts I gave him?
Q. Now my ex as of a few weeks before Christmas, I gave him,Christmas gifts, then the next day , it was over, haven't heard from him since, he didn't give me any gifts, my friends told me he should of given them back, cause he knew he was dumping me, ...
A. 2 January 2018: A gift is a gift.
I'd say learn from this. Don't try and buy love. Don't date men who expect you to pay for everything and who doesn't treat you right.
You are OLD enough to know when you are being used.
Say that he used you for sex, well..... (read in full...)
I'm attracted to his personality and not so much to his looks. Can a relationship work like this?
Q. Hi Everyone! Can a relationship work on personality attraction alone l? I’ve met the most amazing guy I’ve quite possibly ever encountered before. We met in the gym where he works, I did NOT find him atttactive at all when I first met him. The...
A. 1 January 2018: I get that we have a "type" when it comes to looks, but IF you ONLY stick to that you are limiting yourself from really good matches and possible partners.
You say you aren't attracted to him yet you also state that you look forward to seeing h... (read in full...)
My ex still loves me but I don't want to hurt my current boyfriend.
Q. I suddenly met my ex in a wedding a month ago. He still loves me the same and love me though he know I'm in a new relationship. He always treated me a way far better than my present one. I don't want to hurt anyone. But I'm stuckedin between two. ...
A. 1 January 2018: If your current BF isn't a good BF, then end it.
Then take some time being single. There are PLENTY of more guys out there for you NOT to recycle exes.... (read in full...)
I hate that my gay friends have been with girls before
Q. i feel weird cuz all my gay friends have been with girls before or some sorta connection. I feel dumb and alone. At dinner last week we were talking and all 4 of them had sex or girlfriends at some time except me. in lgbt movies its the same thing ...
A. 1 January 2018: If you are gay why is "being with a woman" something you feel you SHOULD do?
Is it because you are afraid of missing out on an experience? Or is it because you compare yourself to your gay friends?
You know, women/men are not guinea pigs for ... (read in full...)
Do I stay and hope that all these things will happen with my partner or do I leave and find them with someone else?
Q. Hi Dear Cupid. As I leave 2017 and start 2018, I'm wondering if I should stay in my relationship of three years or walk away...because within these three years he doesn't seem interested in saving.... I'm 24, he's 23...We are renting togethe...
A. 1 January 2018: I think maybe instead of telling him to save money for a house - explain HOW you feel and why you feel it's necessary to start now.
But I think you HAVE to accept that he and you may NOT have the same goals or at least not the same time line.
... (read in full...)
How do you kill all hope after a breakup?
Q. My ex and I were together over a year,. And broke up 2 weeks ago. We spent 8 months face to face, and nearly a year apart. He told me the distance was a big factor, but that he also felt 'unsure' about our compatability and wanted to think. I told ...
A. 29 December 2017: You don't.
Feelings are not something we can just shut off. They are something you use to work THROUGH a break up.
Going NC, I think, is a good start, for both of you.
Keep busy. That is my best advice. With work, friends and family. If y... (read in full...)
I feel I shouldn't move in til he sorts his children's visitation issue.
Q. I have been dating my bf for 2 years now. we live separately for the moment he has his home and I have mine. He has asked me to move in his home but, I have declined at the moment for this story I will tell. he has 3 children 9,10 and 18. I have ...
A. 24 December 2017: 1. I think you are smart in using some common sense here.
2. You don't know what REALLY went down that resulted in the divorce.
3. Paying Child support is GOOD, but it doesn't mean he was a good husband and father to his family. Just say... (read in full...)
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