He doesn't want my advice
Q. What should I think of this? I'm feeling negative and weird about it. I've been together with my boyfriend for over only half a year. I think it's natural to make suggestions for someone you care about when they are going through a problem. He is ...
A. 26 January 2018: In this case you are the "fixer" and he is the "venter".
Some people wants to FIX everything for everybody even if the other person don't WANT their "solution".
In this case your BF JUST wanted to vent about his weight-loss not being as fast as... (read in full...)
How to deal with my two-faced work friend?
Q. I have a friend, she’s around 8 years younger than me (24). She has always been very nice to me, though she is quite an intense person generally. She’s incredible career obsessed and focused. She recently moved to my department at work. I noticed ...
A. 26 January 2018: She doesn't sound like a FRIEND at all to me. Sounds like she USED you to get a foot in the door.
She also sounds like a really fake and unpleasant kind of person. NOT someone I would want to associate with.
So, IF I was in your shoes, I wo... (read in full...)
Exams and dating are conflicting
Q. I know this guy who's 2 years older than me. We used to hang out while doing projects and event planning but recently I stepped away from all that because my GCSEs are this year. I need to take some time off. Earlier this year he had asked to meet ...
A. 26 January 2018: I'd just focus on exams. If he is interested in you, he will be interested when you are done with them.
And if HE isn't single by then, there will be PLENTY of other guy, some who might even be a better fit.
... (read in full...)
Should I tell my fiance about my fantasy of letting him have sex with others?
Q. Hello. I have a 35 year old boyfriend he is very handsome and active. He looks younger than his age which is a bonus. I love him so much and we have great sex since day one. He has introduced me to his family and friends and recently we got engaged. ...
A. 26 January 2018: Adding more people to the bedroom is usually the beginning of the end.
Some fantasies are MUCH better kept in your head.
Personally? I would be offended if my husband had suggested this (before marriage) and I would NOT have married him. Whi... (read in full...)
Contact him? Or jut move on?
Q. So, I was texting a guy that I met online for a few days. He asked for my number and we continued texting and then he asked to meet a few days after. We set to meet the next day, Friday at 5:30pm for coffee. Friday comes and I texted him asking him ...
A. 25 January 2018: Better luck next time!... (read in full...)
How do I detach myself emotionally from him before actually telling him it's over if I decide I don't want this anymore?
Q. I've been with my boyfriend for five years. To be honest things haven't been right since the second year. I met my boyfriend on online dating. I was 22 and he was 25. We are now 27 and hes 30.At the time he told me he was in and out of a gardening ...
A. 25 January 2018: Wow, OP
I'd hate yo be in your shoes.
Now This is NOT a "bashing you post" but I'd like to point out a few things.
1. When you found out he was a unemployed stoner with no ambition, nor drive other than to party, you SHOULD have let him go r... (read in full...)
My boyfriend says he will break up with me if I move 150 miles away
Q. Iv been dating my boyfriend for a year and i love him so much. But i want to move in with my friend who lives 150 miles away and my boyfriend says if i do he will split up with me and look for someone else. So now i feel trapped because i dont want ...
A. 25 January 2018: If your BF lives with his mom because he can't afford a place of his own, he certainly can't afford to drive 150 miles either. Can he even afford to later to LIVE with you?
Can your relationship really progress if his finances are so low that he ... (read in full...)
My job interviewed didn't offer me a job but asked me out on a date. Is this appropriate?
Q. I am job hunting. I recently got call from one of the jobs I was interested. In the middle of the interview, the interviewer did not offer me the job due to my school schedule clashing with the days he had available. Instead he asked me out on a ...
A. 25 January 2018: Not appropriate.
I would take a mental note of that place and NEVER apply there any more.
Honestly, this really rubs me the wrong way. This is by far a sleazy approach.
Though, I would be FAR more inclined to take it to the company's HE (or ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's mother is a little too involved in our relationship
Q. Hey everyone wondering if anyone can offer some friendly advice on my situation. I've been with my boyfriend about a year and a half although we split in the summer for a couple months due to not getting on and silly little arguments. My boyfriend ...
A. 24 January 2018: I agree with Denizen,
If you live with them, time to move out. If you only spend time there at his place, keep your time together AWAY from the house.
Now you claim that you want a family like his in the future, I think not. After all, this ... (read in full...)
Should I try online dating to get dating experience or is it better for me to continue waiting to find the right guy?
Q. I am 22 and never had a boyfriend before. Sometimes I get really sad and depressed, especially when I see women on social media with their bfs and dating while I am always alone and single. I don't really receive a lot of male attention/intere...
A. 24 January 2018: Why leave it up to the men to chase after you?
ARE you even approachable when out?
You CAN be the one to initiate contact. And if you are SUBTLE enough you CAN make him "think" that HE actually made that choice.
You can't sit on your hand a... (read in full...)
Will we ever come to a compromise or are we just way too different with our goals in life?
Q. My fiancee and I have been together for just over 3 years. We have been commuting back and forth for 2.5 of the 3 years (6 months ago my fiancee decided he'd move a little closer so that we could see each other more) And since the first week we met, ...
A. 24 January 2018: I think you have hit the nail on the head.
I think he originally said whatever he thought YOU wanted to hear. Which was... "I want to live on the Coast with you".
But over time the truth is shining through. Living on the Coast is NOT really wh... (read in full...)
Contact him? Or jut move on?
Q. So, I was texting a guy that I met online for a few days. He asked for my number and we continued texting and then he asked to meet a few days after. We set to meet the next day, Friday at 5:30pm for coffee. Friday comes and I texted him asking him ...
A. 24 January 2018: Move on.
He couldn't even bother to remember the original plan after being the one to SUGGEST you meet up.
He couldn't remember the time OR the place and then didn't even show!
After this "failure to meet" he hasn't even bothered to try and... (read in full...)
I wanted our mutual breakup to end on a good note but it hasn't and I am not coping with it
Q. I was with my girlfriend since last two years, n we were good together. She always relied on me whenever she needed me even for d most small of her requirements but den few months back, according to our Hindu mythology we matched our stars or as we ...
A. 24 January 2018: OP,
Most people are NOT able to be ACTUAL friends after a break up, not if there are still romantic feelings floating around. A clean break IS better.
You might have wanted to end it on a good note (nothing wrong in that) but SHE didn't. She ... (read in full...)
How do you feel ok with being single at 30?
Q. How can you learn to be ok with being single at 30? I’m 30 and single, and I know I’m not the only one and that there are probably other single women out there my age or older. I’ve only had one relationship in my life that was “serious” (yr and a ...
A. 24 January 2018: What makes you happy? (like hobbies, sports, entertainment)
Maybe what you need to do is BRING happiness back into your life.
Men don't (in general) "flock" to women who seem unhappy and having no confidence. Just like women don't "flock" to... (read in full...)
Do I stay? I have a lot to consider! Any advice would be helpful!
Q. My problem is quite complex and works across a number of different levels and areaa. So i want to break it down and look at some of them piece by piece. The under pinning issue is that 18 months ago i moved from the UK to Norway (Oslo) to be with ...
A. 24 January 2018: I think this is actually a common issue with people who are from two different countries/States/areas end up in LDR's. Let me explain why.
When you MADE the choice to move to HER country, you gave up EVERYTHING that you were when you met her. You... (read in full...)
Is this what to expect after 10 years? Or has my relationship run its course?
Q. Hi, I've been with my partner for over 10 years now. I'm not sure what to expect out of the relationship. If I'm looking for too much and it's unrealistic. I feel like we don't have anything in common anymore. He just plays computer games a...
A. 24 January 2018: I have to agree with BtNot,
Your relationship has hit it's expiration date. You can not FIX a broken down relationship all on your own, if he REFUSES to pitch in, to actually acknowledge that things are not good and there needs to be some changes ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong of me to say I would leave my girlfriend if she became an addict? Is it right of her to say that I can't keep things that might "tempt" her around?
Q. I was having a conversation with my girlfriend the other day about her being upset because her brothers have started smoking weed again. I have no problem with weed. I've smoked it before myself, but apparently for them it starts them on harder ...
A. 24 January 2018: I fully agree with YouWish,
I wouldn't even consider being with someone smoking weed or drinking heavily. Now if my husband got some really GOOD benefits out of marijuana, I'd be fine with him ingesting the oil - there is NOT real need to SMOKE it... (read in full...)
Do I mean anything to him? Why is he with me if he doesn't see a future with us?
Q. Some background: I (27 years old) have been seeing this man (33 years old) for four months now. We get along incredibly well and always have fun together. It is very comfortable when we are around each other and we naturally give off an impressi...
A. 23 January 2018: I don't think it's unusual to have doubts at 4 months. It's still in the "getting to know you phase". So he might not be entirely sure about you two as a long term partnership.
The whole "worried" about picking the wrong partner. Well, there ar... (read in full...)
Strong mutual attraction with my married supervisor. Should I continue working with him?
Q. So I just completed my first year in a master's program at a pretty prestigious university and I'm held at very high standards due to the field I'm working in. For the next year I am required to complete several hundred hours of an internship before ...
A. 23 January 2018: Is saying no, and keeping it professional really THAT hard?
I don't get it.
So he is attractive, OK - He is flirtatious, OK you CAN set boundaries and NOT flirt back if it seems to sexual or he acts TOO familiar.
You make it sound like you ... (read in full...)
Its to the point where anything with my family causes problems between my husband and I
Q. So my sister and I have never got on, even when we were kids. Now days we have little to do with one another, we have to get together occasionally because, you know, family, but we never talk, or have a conversation unless i'm being made fun of (I'm ...
A. 22 January 2018: I would stand up for my husband in this case.
Like with the tickets, unless YOU and your husband could buy an extra ticket so HE could come too, I would decline going. And I know that isn't fair on your mom, but I would do something ELSE with mom... (read in full...)
How to get rid of a clingy yet toxic friend ?
Q. I am a female student presently studying at a university where I met this other woman friend at a social gathering through some common friends.She was whining a lot about how she was not coping up at studies and with university life in general. Some ...
A. 22 January 2018: I'd just slowly cut the contact and avoid doing projects with her.
Be less and less available. Focus on your education and the people who ADD to your life, be it at school and away from school.
It sounds like she is a bit jealous of you a... (read in full...)
Married and seriously falling for my doctor
Q. I am head over heels for my surgeon. I have been seeing him for about 4-5 months and my feelings keep getting stronger. There was only one time when I thought he might be interested. He told me I had a nice smile and put his hand on my thigh. Since ...
A. 22 January 2018: So OP, what are you missing from your own marriage that you think this is appropriate for you to pursue this doctor?
You say you don't care, but that is being a selfish person.
I think with him having had trouble with public intoxication, an... (read in full...)
He is very confused, should I give up?
Q. Hello everyone, I'm 25 years old homosexual guy. two months ago I met a guy on Skype (who lives not so away from me). At first we talked like friends, but then we started flirting and now it seems that we like each other very much. we talk on Skype...
A. 22 January 2018: I think IF you are looking for a partner or even JUST a lover, he isn't the right one for you.
He can't BE with you because he wants to please his family, he doesn't WANT others to know that he is gay, he doesn't even fully want to accept that he ... (read in full...)
What hope for this relationship?
Q. I’m heartbroken and confused by all of this and appreciate any insight. Please bear with me and my story. I’m 30 and he’s 32. He’s Single. Never married. About 6 months ago, our friendship progressed to us having mutual feelings towards each other. ...
A. 22 January 2018: 1. I think you tried a LITTLE to hard a LITTLE too soon.
The whole "what are we?" after a few dates and a cuddle - it comes off quite pushy and desperate. IMO
The more you PUSHED the more he retreated. And I don't blame him (at least not in the... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel humiliated?
Q. Why was this cAfe server laughing at me? Ordered a coffee from a mall cafe 3 weeks earlier.. I ordered a Coffee and a small cookie,( the same order I ordered 3 weeks ago) Same server. Whilst ordering she began laughing at me saying “...
A. 22 January 2018: I forgot to add, NO ONE can MAKE you feel something you don't want to feel.
Now someone might TRY and humiliate you, but it's ENTIRELY up to you if you wish to react to it or not.
... (read in full...)
Am I right to feel humiliated?
Q. Why was this cAfe server laughing at me? Ordered a coffee from a mall cafe 3 weeks earlier.. I ordered a Coffee and a small cookie,( the same order I ordered 3 weeks ago) Same server. Whilst ordering she began laughing at me saying “...
A. 22 January 2018: I agree with Cindy too.
Some American in the service industry tries a just a "little" too hard to be "friendly", "charming" and/or "witty" hoping to either gain a better tip, or smile, or chat/conversation out of a customer.
My guess is she was... (read in full...)
A guy I was dating said how hot my sister was, and I dumped him the same night! Am I overreacting?
Q. Hey, everyone. So I met a guy a few weeks ago and we have been on 3 dates total. I enjoyed my time with him and he's quirky in the way that he thinks and he can come off like an ass, not in a malicious way, but it intrigues me and he has treated me ...
A. 22 January 2018: Honestly?
You kind of set this up. Were you hoping he would RAG on your sister when you showed him the picture? To make YOU feel better? Who does that?
He didn't say she was HOTTER than you, just that she was hot.
I think you are TOTALLY ov... (read in full...)
I can’t figure out what happened with him?!?
Q. So I was talking to this guy for like some months now. We found each other online though we already knew each other beforehand, we started talking in a dating manner only from like 4 months before... so i had never really met him after we started ...
A. 22 January 2018: He sounds like a guy who likes to play games with people online.
Honestly? If you two didn't go on any dates in person, I am not sure how strongly EITHER of you really felt, more like infatuated with the idea of being with each other.
You say... (read in full...)
Is he using me as a means to come to Canada?
Q. Hello I married a man from Africa and I am Canadian. We have been together for 11 months and I am trying to get him to Canada. He has been good to me but very dominant and expects I be submissive and do whatever he says to me. If I don’t he ge...
A. 22 January 2018: I have to ask, HOW did you two meet?
Online?... (read in full...)
Ideas for sex with a submissive man
Q. Hello! It's been a long time since I've been here. I've across a few new things. First off my boyfriend and I of 3 years broke up the day before new years. It's been hard. We've had sex since then. Honestly, we still love each other to death but ...
A. 21 January 2018: Best way to figure this out is to TALK to him. Ask him if there is a little fantasy he wants to role play or what things he REALLY likes for you to do with/to him.
There isn't a "one size fits all" when it comes to sexuality and sexual preferen... (read in full...)
He's abusive and I need to get out
Q. I'm going through a really difficult period in my life and don't know what to do. How to restart and go on... I'm 41 and have been with my husband for 15 years, no kids. Good times and bad. Well now things have gotten pretty bad. The good times y...
A. 21 January 2018: Thanks for the update, OP!
It's always good to hear when a poster finds something useful to take away from the answers.
I also understand why you stayed for this long. Having hope that someone will get better, or that you can help them, it's ... (read in full...)
How do I change this pattern of negativity?
Q. How can I believe in love and stop being so jaded. I have been in two horrible relationships that have broken my spirits but on top of that I am surrounded by men that are horrible. At work I see some men that are married but act like someone that ...
A. 21 January 2018: Decent men (and women) do exist.
I think bad behavior is more obvious and because of your past you see these patterns much easier than you notice a "decent guy" and his behavior.
The things is, OP - you have REALLY great tools at your fingerti... (read in full...)
He's lusting after young women. What do I get?
Q. My partner can't get the type of girls he wants because they are well out of his league (model types much younger than us )we're in our forties ) and he spends his times lusting after them in porn. This makes me feel like he is settling for me a...
A. 21 January 2018: I think you are giving porn WAY to much power in your life.
Yes, I bet more men look at younger porn stars instead of the more mature ones (regardless of their own age) Because? Our culture worships youth. TBH, IF I were to watch porn (I don't) I... (read in full...)
Should I try to reconnect with him now that I live nearby?
Q. In October of last year, while I was on the west coast for a job interview I met a guy from Tinder. His profile said he wasn't looking for a relationship but just looking to meet cool people. We went on a date, had a great time and while it wasn't ...
A. 21 January 2018: Honestly?
I wouldn't. You had a one night's stand with this dude whom you met on Tindr (a hook up site). You then added each other but didn't REALLY keep in touch. You tried contact in December and go NO reply. What does that tell you?
He is b... (read in full...)
Is he using me as a means to come to Canada?
Q. Hello I married a man from Africa and I am Canadian. We have been together for 11 months and I am trying to get him to Canada. He has been good to me but very dominant and expects I be submissive and do whatever he says to me. If I don’t he ge...
A. 21 January 2018: I'm with Ciar,
I think you are WAY to naive here. Demanding you send him $1,000 for his birthday? What does he think you are? An ATM? His mother? And more over, WHO does he think HE is? Why should YOU pay for his birthday party? He is a grown as... (read in full...)
He's abusive and I need to get out
Q. I'm going through a really difficult period in my life and don't know what to do. How to restart and go on... I'm 41 and have been with my husband for 15 years, no kids. Good times and bad. Well now things have gotten pretty bad. The good times y...
A. 21 January 2018: I don't think talking to him is a good idea either. Whether it's his meds that are making things worse or HE is just getting worse (because HE is more comfortable with acting out) - it really doesn't matter.
I think looking into either a room-mat... (read in full...)
I feel I owe this married man an apology
Q. Hello Aunts, I met this man sometime in 2015 when i was on a temporal job in another state in the country. He is Married with a son. When we first met, he was attracted to me and we pretty get along so well. He dropped hints about dating me bu...
A. 20 January 2018: Even if all you want is a "sex mate" - chose one that is SINGLE so you don't go around hurting other people (like a wife or partner).
Want a bit more for yourself.... (read in full...)
Why did he block me? Was it because I didn’t have sex with him?
Q. Hey guys.. I randomly met this guy last week and as soon as I saw him, I liked him. He seemed shy and I could tell he was into me but I knew he wouldn't ask me out, so I did. He took my number and he asked me to dinner on Saturday. Well he knew how ...
A. 20 January 2018: Just ask him to meet at the nearest Starbucks (or whatnot that is close to your house or work) so you can get the ring.
When you show up, get the ring, wish him well in his endeavors, BE ALL smiles, and GTFO. Don't take the time to listen to sad l... (read in full...)
How do I handle troublesome ex?
Q. My boyfriend had a son from a previous relationship. We have 2 children together now and one on the way. This ex of his won't let him see his other child, and talks a lot of nonsense about him on social media, whether it's directly or indirectly. I ...
A. 20 January 2018: My advice BLOCK all her social media, she is TRYING oh so hard to goad you into proving her right.
Don't argue with her, don't try and educate her - just DON'T. It's not your job to teach her how to be a mother or decent person.
It's NOT wort... (read in full...)
Thiinking of leaving because husband is so controlling
Q. Hi I have been married for 25 years. We have had some good times but my husband is very controlling and demeans me. I am not allowed to have any male friends because in his mind it’s wrong and that means I am having sex with them. If I enjoy...
A. 20 January 2018: So in short, OP
You proved your husband right. That when you DO have contact with other men you want to have sex with them...
Maybe it IS time for you to leave. If you are not working, finding a job should be your first priority, then a... (read in full...)
Boyfriend shows no respect
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 8 months now and we have been practically living together since day one. First off he is a total momma's boy, which I have no problem with. But I know he will never out me first before her. My problem is that he ...
A. 20 January 2018: So why are you with him?
While I don't THINK he should put you above his mom in priority - after all you have known him 8 months, SHE his whole life. And that should never be a competition anyways.
But for someone to TREAT you like you are the... (read in full...)
I feel I owe this married man an apology
Q. Hello Aunts, I met this man sometime in 2015 when i was on a temporal job in another state in the country. He is Married with a son. When we first met, he was attracted to me and we pretty get along so well. He dropped hints about dating me bu...
A. 20 January 2018: Cut the contact, OP
He isn't looking for a friend. He was hoping that the "friendship" would lead to sex. He is married.
Think about it for a minute here, HOW would you feel if YOUR husband were up to these kind of things with another woman? Y... (read in full...)
Why did he block me? Was it because I didn’t have sex with him?
Q. Hey guys.. I randomly met this guy last week and as soon as I saw him, I liked him. He seemed shy and I could tell he was into me but I knew he wouldn't ask me out, so I did. He took my number and he asked me to dinner on Saturday. Well he knew how ...
A. 19 January 2018: Good for you, OP!
As "petty" as it may sound I hope it helps you move past this guy and past thinking YOU did something wrong.
He KNEW what he was doing, and he was being a twat!
Chin up and better luck next time!... (read in full...)
Why did he block me? Was it because I didn’t have sex with him?
Q. Hey guys.. I randomly met this guy last week and as soon as I saw him, I liked him. He seemed shy and I could tell he was into me but I knew he wouldn't ask me out, so I did. He took my number and he asked me to dinner on Saturday. Well he knew how ...
A. 18 January 2018: OP, just learn from it.
I get that it can be hard to find a decent fella online, so maybe TRY other things too?
Meeting people through family, friends, hobbies, sports might actually work too.
It's OK to tell a guy (if he tries to get you ... (read in full...)
Why did he block me? Was it because I didn’t have sex with him?
Q. Hey guys.. I randomly met this guy last week and as soon as I saw him, I liked him. He seemed shy and I could tell he was into me but I knew he wouldn't ask me out, so I did. He took my number and he asked me to dinner on Saturday. Well he knew how ...
A. 17 January 2018: Honestly, OP?
Seems like you dodged a bullet. And, that YOU need to start having a BIT more self-preservation going on.
Sorry, you do NOT go to a guys house after midnight (or at all) whom you have ONLY known a week! Just no. Not even to "fig... (read in full...)
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