I don't know what to say. I just feel lost and alone.
Q. My relationship is ending. I feel like I'm losing my best friend, my person. I know I should "man up" but the grief is overwhelming right now. A 7+ year relationship is ending and I don't see any way that I can ever move on. The woman I fell...
A. 29 August 2018: It's not so strange to be feeling the way you are feeling. I think we have all been there at one point in time. So, know that it will get better, but breaking up with someone doesn't mean memories vanish or feelings just stop.
I have certain ... (read in full...)
I don't know what to say. I just feel lost and alone.
Q. My relationship is ending. I feel like I'm losing my best friend, my person. I know I should "man up" but the grief is overwhelming right now. A 7+ year relationship is ending and I don't see any way that I can ever move on. The woman I fell...
A. 29 August 2018: You "man up" as you call it or you can DEAL with it. Ending a long term relationship is very much like grieving. It's the end of something familiar with a person you care(d) for, of course it will hurt! It would be weird if it didn't! Emotional pain ... (read in full...)
I often worry when people don't respond quickly enough
Q. I often get worried when I don't receive a reply from someone and I know this may seem silly as not everyone is able to reply or they might be busy. there's one friend in particular that I try to not text or contact because I get worried if she does...
A. 29 August 2018: You should try and go a WEEK without your phone or any other tech (other than what you need for work).
No social media, no nothing.
She doesn't hate you OP, if she did she would probably block you rather than take a long while to reply. It mig... (read in full...)
My boyfriend contacts my mum instead of me
Q. After my previous post where me and my boyfriend have been on break for 3 weeks after a big row over one of my flaws..I ended up in A and E yesterday after an accident in work..my mother text him to let him know and he rung her right away. What's ...
A. 29 August 2018: You mom is old enough to tell him, Buster, this is something YOU need to deal with I can't be your messenger. The end.
You shouldn't do it.
Your Bf cares about you but is still unsure if getting back together is the right thing. What does... (read in full...)
My partner betrayed me by breaking our swinging rules
Q. Me and my partner tried swinging it was his idea. Before I drank alcahol I told him what I was and was not ok with and that he should respect my wishes. He said ok. I got drunk and he broke all the rules (sex and kissing) I had discussed with h...
A. 29 August 2018: You should end it.
And NOT agree to stuff you really don't want to do. Not for a guy. And not to keep a relationship. You can't take back something like swinging. What you had BEFORE you won't ever have again. THAT was YOUR choice. YOU made tha... (read in full...)
I don't feel guilty for cheating
Q. Things with my bf have been Rocky for a while. We've been together nearly 4 years. We hardly sleep together, we never go to restaurants, we argue alot but when I've suggested we break up he gets teapot upset and says things like without you I will ...
A. 29 August 2018: Bullshit, OP
Your BF can not REFUSE to break up. That's ridiculous.
You END it with your BF whether he likes it or not. THEN you can go about screwing whomever you like!
You ALREADY hurt your BF, he just doesn't know it yet...
Be a decent... (read in full...)
How do I deal with a clingy roommate?
Q. I am having some issues with my roommate. I live in a large,expensive city. I’ve been here for a few years and really like it. I love my job and have a lot of friends. Because I am a teacher and paying for graduate school, I needed to sav...
A. 29 August 2018: Tell her one night she pops out when you get home and tired, that you LOVE your peace and quiet at home after a long day at work, then excuse yourself and go to your room or whatever.
KEEP doing that until she backs off a little. I would sorta sl... (read in full...)
I've lost interest in my fiance but feel guilty about dumping him
Q. Hi I’ve been with my fiancé for just over 5 years we’ve had our problems due to his lack of affection amongst other things the main problem is that he won’t talk through any problems we have he walks out with his dog I say communication is the key ...
A. 29 August 2018: I would end it.
You can't date someone out of pity or marry someone you no longer feel interested in. THAT isn't being kind to him to string him along.
So, yes, I'd end it ASAP and wish him well.
... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is attracted to another woman
Q. My boyfriend is sexually attracted to another girl they used to be like best friends she was my best friend but after she asked him to lie to me he stopped talking to her it’s been more than a year since he doesn’t talk with her but he is still at...
A. 29 August 2018: I think we all have a chance of feeling sexual attractions towards other than our partners, doesn't mean the person will pursue it.
What I do find weird is that he mentioned this to you. That he mentions he still thinks about her and he still ta... (read in full...)
He's messing around with that other girl, he's the one that moved out leaving me paying all the bills when I'm unemployed and yet somehow I'm at fault?
Q. Hi guys, this will be a long one so please bear with me... I moved abroad around 3 years ago for work. Two years in, I met Jay who I thought was, as tacky as it sounds, the one for me. I had never had this connection with anybody before and there...
A. 28 August 2018: I think you should cut all contacts with him and focus on finding a job that can pay the bills. Getting your dream job might have to wait.
When you GET a job, start saving (as much as you can) so in due time you can pursue your dream-jo... (read in full...)
He wants to return to his home country but I don't want to join him
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years. Things have been good but we're trying to think more seriously about our future together. He's from another country and originally wanted to move back there to start a life. For a litt...
A. 28 August 2018: Let's say he build a house there... that means IT IS where he wants to be. So what about you? Would you have t give up living near your family? Well, yes.
When you date someone who isn't from around where YOU are from, THIS is where it goes. Ei... (read in full...)
I have caught my husband in so many lies regarding his female coworker. Is it wrong for me to ask him to stay away from her?
Q. Hello, My husband has been lying to me for the past few months, all lies have involved his coworker. He has lied to me about calling her, dropping her off at home, going to hang out with her at her house, buying her gifts, including an exp...
A. 28 August 2018: My question is this, WHY would he listen to you now?
You know he lies about this, you have caught him many times and HE knows you know too. YET, you stay with him and he keep doing whatever he wants.
It's not like your words is going to make hi... (read in full...)
My will be joining another couple for a threesome
Q. So let me start by saying my wife and I have been married for 8 years an are blessed/ deeply in love. So last night we had a couple over for cocktails, I was at work when they arrived and when I got there my wife was already buzzed and was acting v...
A. 27 August 2018: I think you have to put your foot down here.
This is not OK. She can't go around make these choices WITHOUT your consent, unless you have some kind of arrangement already.
Even if she listens to you and don't do, how you can you really trust... (read in full...)
Is it possible for someone to be so self-centered and selfish that he doesn't even realize he's in the wrong?
Q. Is it possible for someone to be so self-centered and selfish that he doesn't even realize he's in the wrong? Here are a few examples : 1. I believe in bringing the kids to travel internationally to visit different countries and cultures to 'see...
A. 27 August 2018: I absolutely agree with Cindy (on everything).
While I get hat it's NOT uncommon to find out that you and your partner don't agree on 100% of things... What it really comes down to is the ability to compromise.
I traveled a lot with my parents ... (read in full...)
5 years with my partner but don't know if I want to spend the rest of my life with him
Q. I’ve been with my partner for five years now and I honestly do love him. However recently I’ve started thinking that I don’t know if I want to spend the rest of my life with him. We currently live together but I’ve been wanting to move house for ...
A. 27 August 2018: OP, you can love someone and car for them and NOT be a good match long term.
I think you have reached a point where you know what you want and so does he - and those two things are not compatible.
If you want kids and marriage - he isn't for y... (read in full...)
He'll do anything .... except come fishin'
Q. My family are a big fishing family (both my side and my husband's family loves fishing). We tried to teach our children to love fishing. We have three children and three grandchildren. Our youngest son, Justin, is 33 years old and he hates fis...
A. 26 August 2018: He doesn't enjoy it, so why try and force it?
He is also 33 so OLD enough to decide WHAT he wants to do with his time off.
Respect that he doesn't want to come.... (read in full...)
I feel like I am forcing myself on him.
Q. Im in a long distance relationship that would be three years in November. My boyfriend has been in school abroad, he’s graduated now and is back home.Sometimes things are great, sometimes they are not. So I thought that now that he’s back, and ...
A. 26 August 2018: Put in as much (or little) effort as he does. IF he doesn't call, don't call. If he doesn't text or send you generic "how are you texts" do the same.
And then you give yourself a time line, let's say 30 days. IF he hasn't picked up on YOU not maki... (read in full...)
I'm interested in a girl who has a boyfriend. Do I drop a hint that I'm single?
Q. I split up with my long term partner because I wasn't sure how I felt and it didn't feel right anymore. I'm in no rush to get into a relationship again but there is a girl who I have an interest in. I think there is a connection between us as I'...
A. 26 August 2018: You CHOSE to leave your GF in hopes that THIS girl would want to get with you... Wrong reason to dump a girl.
You should NEVER end a relationship because you think the grass is greener... you either "WATER the grass" you are on/with (aka make thi... (read in full...)
How do I tell my fiance I'm not a virgin. I don't want her to know who I had sex with
Q. My cousin and I, when we were in are early teens, made an extremely stupid choice and had sex with each other. We are the same age and at the time, we both enjoyed it. We lost our virginity to each other. Now as an adult, I realize how stupid it ...
A. 26 August 2018: You don't NEED to tell your fiance any detail or give her names.
You can tell her that you regret your first time but it's in the past and you don't want to discuss it. It's OK to have had sex being young and stupid. After all 80% of women re... (read in full...)
Is it the world or is it just me?
Q. What am I doing to push people away or just get used all the time. All my friends from school don’t really bother, any gatherings, I’m usually last resort. If I flash my money and support them, buy them lunch, look after them, they will love t...
A. 25 August 2018: While I get that it SUCKS that the people you have around you don't REALLY see you as someone they WANT to spend time with (unless you pay for whatever). I think if I were you, I'd start to find things I enjoy and go alone. If you have hobbies see ... (read in full...)
His ex hates me because he dumped her two weeks before dating me
Q. So to explain the situation a bit better Ive been best friends with an American man for about 12.5 years now, I lived in Ireland and we met online and started as penpals , we have emailed nearly every day for 12 years and always rang each other and ...
A. 25 August 2018: I agree, I would involve the cops.
She ONLY dated him a short while so her behavior and anger is disproportional. which to me shows that she might not be totally right in her head. Or she is just VERY immature. Though, Like Cindy states, I get wh... (read in full...)
I’m not a sex doll with a bottomless purse and no needs of my own!
Q. I've been with my bf for 3 and a half years. Recently we are not getting along. I had a great job but I found out they were going to replace me so I quit. I tried to find a new job and I couldn't find one for 2 months. Which meant my partner had to ...
A. 24 August 2018: First of all WHY did you pick up his dirty clothes and plates?
Yes, I get that he was covering for the both of you financially while you were job hunting, but that doesn't make you his house-elf or servant.
You wrote: "He expects all my m... (read in full...)
Leaving a married man is more painful than staying
Q. So I ended my A over a month ago. I felt like a huge weight was lighted off my shoulders that I finally off the roller coster ride of emotions. I started wanting more than he can give He would always make excuses to come to my place go to your p...
A. 23 August 2018: How sad that you lowered your standards to fucking a married man in a bush or a car... I mean how low can you go?
Yes, it will hurt to leave someone you crave and someone you obviously think you care for. Married or not.
The fact that HE is ... (read in full...)
My brother owes me money!
Q. Okay, I'm not sure if this is the right place for this but here goes. I'm really needing some sound advice here because I really feel myself at the point of no return and I don't know what to do or want to fall out with anyone. My little broth...
A. 23 August 2018: Sit him down and suggest a payment plan for him paying you back.
And IF he can not comply give him 3 weeks and then he is out of your home.
You can then look for a room mate who WILL pay the 1/2 rent etc.
... (read in full...)
How do I kindly but clearly help her understand I am looking for friendship only?
Q. Hi, With compassion and honesty, I would like to thoughtfully help someone clearly understand I am looking for friendship only. I am a 28 year old male and share the office floor with another team that includes a 22 year old girl. She acts tou...
A. 23 August 2018: I think IF she is hoping for romance trying to be "platonic friends" is unrealistic.
You have given her little "bread crumb clues" that she has ignored because it's NOT what she wants. Or she is a little dense.
I don't think she will underst... (read in full...)
They look so happy on their photos and get so many likes on them and I can't help feeling like I despise them both
Q. My ex and I broke up at the start of February after 5 years together. We shared a house, was talking about getting engaged and starting a family etc but I left. I realised I wanted to fulfill my dream of getting a degree which he didn't approve of. ...
A. 23 August 2018: How do you get over it?
Well, for one STOP looking at ANY of his social media! Why BOTHER stalk his Instagram when it HURTS your feelings? Do you also pout salt and lemon juice in paper-cuts or other open wounds?
Common sense, OP - USE it.
... (read in full...)
Our male co-worker is too friendly with my girlfriend
Q. Hey so i work with my gf and we have this male coworker who is engaged. but he is always giving my gf a little gift like once a month. it could be some bread he baked or the last thing was a pack of paper clips with a note saying he hopes this ...
A. 23 August 2018: If your GF is the same age as you, then she is OLD enough to know if this is a platonic friendship or not.
How ever, YOU can tell her you feel uncomfortable with him gifting her little gifts, as you find it inappropriate and unnecessary. SHE can ... (read in full...)
Accidental work fling with a subordinate
Q. I began a new job back in October - which was my first real directing title. At the time I was given a number two as well as any other team members I needed to develop the area. In the beginning it was very hard for me and my no.2 to see eye to e...
A. 23 August 2018: Nope it's over and done with.
Basically, it was a mistake. Talking about it... won't change that it was a mistake.
LEARN from this. Don't go home with "some" man, don't DRINK with "some" man. Don't have sex with a coworker.
Put on the "pre... (read in full...)
After 2 months away my boyfriend wants us to take a break
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 6 months and he just got back from being away for 2 months on a family vacation. Ever since he got back, things have not felt the same. Everything was pretty much really awkward. So, we talked and at first we...
A. 23 August 2018: You can't make it stronger all by yourself and he doesn't WANT to date you, hence the "break".
OP, if people need a "break" this soon in a VERY short relationship (and yes, 4 months together+ 2 months LDR IS very short) - then the relation... (read in full...)
The guy I've been seeing just asked about a threesome with my friend
Q. A guy I've been seeing for not long was talking to me tonight and he pulled up a pic on my social media and asked if it was my friend in the pic. I said yes and he said she looks familiar. He then a few sentences later was asking if I wanted a...
A. 23 August 2018: Yep run for the hills.
He isn't looking to have a solid relationship he just wants access to your female friends for HIS sexual fantasies.
And like Ciar said, he is a creep... Going through your social media to pick out who he would like to sl... (read in full...)
Should I ask why he blocked me?
Q. I met a guy online at the end of last year. When we met he was in the process of trying to move back to london and had been offered a job. The job offer fell through and he didn’t end up moving to london. We still stayed in touch but not in a lon...
A. 23 August 2018: No, he doesn't OWE you an explanation. To be honest. You aren't dating you are just "talking". While I find it SUPER childish to BLOCK people if there is no good reason, ANYONE is free to block or not block whomever they like.
My guess IS he has m... (read in full...)
I just can’t shake the feeling that he’ll be benefiting from me!
Q. Hey, so I have a dilemma! My boyfriend of 6 months is due to move in soon, I'm very happy and so is he, we adore each other. I have my own place which is owned by family, I don't pay any rent, my grandmother pays for the service charge whic...
A. 22 August 2018: I think you should SHARE the cost that your grandmother pays and I think him paying HALF the cost is fair enough.
But I agree, him living with you will ALSO financially benefit YOU if you don't start paying your grandmother some of that 2,000 sh... (read in full...)
Should I become famous to get close to him?
Q. I am interested in a celebrity I only see him at events but i talk to.him on social media everyday. I met him at an.event and he knew who i was and some details about me, is it okay that im interested in him? I write him letters sometime too, ...
A. 22 August 2018: Oh, I forgot to add...
If you keep going down this path you MIGHT be regarded as a stalker at some point... is that what you want people to think of you?... (read in full...)
Should I become famous to get close to him?
Q. I am interested in a celebrity I only see him at events but i talk to.him on social media everyday. I met him at an.event and he knew who i was and some details about me, is it okay that im interested in him? I write him letters sometime too, ...
A. 22 August 2018: Why would anyone go through ALL that effort of becoming famous for ONE guy?
That makes no sense!
You talk to him over social media, he knows you are a fan and hasn't seem to take further interest so I think you being "famous" or not has littl... (read in full...)
My profile was on a dating app...
Q. I have a long term partner of many years , with whom I'm really happy. About a year ago we were chatting in bed about dating in general, and how hard it must be to meet someone suitable, etc.We'd just been watching one of our favorite TV programs...
A. 22 August 2018: No you don't call your GF's best friend, UNLESS you want drama. It's none of her business.
If you aren't using the app anymore delete the profile, unsubscribe, make sure you are no longer linked with Facebook or other social media then uninstal... (read in full...)
Does my wife really believe we need this money this bad?
Q. I'll try to keep it short. My wife picked up a small second job cleaning/taking care of an elderly man (80's) 20 hours a week. She heard of this guy through a customer at her waitressing job. Guy is paying her $20 an hour under the table. Pr...
A. 20 August 2018: I think your wife believes she can handle the old horny coot. And make some money at the same time.
Have you told her, "I rather you didn't work for this old creep, his behavior gives me the creeps and I worry for your safety? I don't like you... (read in full...)
Should I continue to see both my girlfriends or just one?
Q. I have 2 girlfriends, A and D. I have been in an open relationship with A for 4 months and D for a little more than 2 months. Both know about each other and I am in love with both of them. D is older and married to a man and the marriage is open. ...
A. 20 August 2018: It honestly sounds like a total cluster-fuck.
I Personally don't get open relationships, because it means you SPLIT your attention and focus from ONE person to multiple people.
Why the need for SO many partners? Is ONE of them not enough? Are ... (read in full...)
Do people change? He wants me to accept he has and wants to have another baby!
Q. After years of my husband being very neglectful , toxic, drunkard and bullheaded.. i decided to stop caring and do my own other things.. Now that he has realized that i might leave the relationship...he says he agrees with me about everythi...
A. 20 August 2018: No don't add more children to this mess.
One thing is being READY to change, another is to ACTUALLY change.
One thing is SAYING he will change, another is to ACTUALLY change.
You have to decide IF you think him capable of changing.
Bu... (read in full...)
He sucks! Why am I not good enough?
Q. Hi! I’ve been married to my husband for 7 years now. Prior to him I had a couple long term relationships that ended on “good” terms, by that I mean it wasn’t a bad break up. Kinda like we knew it was done when it was done. Anyway:... I’ve never been ...
A. 20 August 2018: Honestly?
I think he is done being married to you but he doesn't WANT to be the one to break things up, so he pushes ALL your buttons and YOU come out looking like the "nutter".
Personally? I think you doing YOURSELF a disservice by "c... (read in full...)
How do I get closure after he broke up with me?
Q. I have been dating this guy for about a month now and we did make it official. We hang out on weekends because of our schedules, but haven’t seen each other the past 3 weeks. We made plans to hang out, but he ended up falling asleep and we didn't ...
A. 20 August 2018: How do you get closure?
Well, I know many people have this notion that they HAVE to get "closure" when a relationship/friendship falls apart, like it's an instant "the end, all better now".
The thing with closure is, that YOU can GIVE yoursel... (read in full...)
Did I just get used for sex?
Q. So I've known this guy for a while and last week our texts turned sexual and he said do I want to meet with him. So we met we were kissing, we held hands we had a good time. Then he asked if I wanted to have sex with him I said I couldn't because I ...
A. 19 August 2018: Honestly, OP?
A guy who asks for SEX on the first "date" or first time you meet in person is NOT looking for a relationship but for a FWB or a F-buddy.
YOU OFFERED a blow job so he didn't USE you, you could have said no. But.. that doesn't mea... (read in full...)
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