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... Send *oubleM a private message | | | *oubleM's profile:DoubleM currently resides in Fort Worth Texas, but has lived in southern California (Hollywood), Hawaii, Europe and North Africa as well as Texas. Attended the University of Texas. Now single (possibly forever) after three marriages, one of 20 years. Mainly tries to help with sexual issues. Views and opinions are very permissive and suggestions are often brief and to the point. |
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Husband thinks my high sex drive is pathetic
Q. I'm 25 yrs old, 5ft 5, 124 lbs.... I am an attractive female, long burgundy hair, and I love sex... It is my absolute favorite thing on this earth. My husband is 5ft 10, brown hair, and about 20 lbs overweight. And he isn't a verry big fan of having ...
A. 7 July 2012: Well I think it sounds like a problem relationship. There must be something else going on in his life. A marriage, though I have had one very successful one and a couple of dumb ones, should be a partnership with passion and extreme friendship. It ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend said I can sleep with prostitutes if I wear a condom
Q. I have the most loveliest girlfriend in the world. She is so sweet and adores me. I love her so much and I can't imagine not being without her. Then 2 days ago she said to me she allows me to have sex with prostitutes if I wear a condom. She sai...
A. 6 July 2012: Just tell her that you have no interest, or need, to do that.... (read in full...)
Boyfriend acts kind of strange about sex. Is he gay?
Q. My man prefers to masturbate while I am next to him sucking on his chest. I want him to have intercourse with me but he doesn't. He will only let me ride it and most of the time it is not that hard. He is 66 and I am 59. Do you think he might be ...
A. 3 July 2012: By the way, in my opinion, there is a biological reason for a man's decreasing sex drive and abilities at some point when they reach their 50s, 60s or older. As i suggested, every man may be different, but the aforementioned biological reason is ... (read in full...)
Is this how it is? Do most man losing their sex drive and sexual function over 45?
Q. Do most man losing their sex drive and sexual function over 45? And only a few stay horny and able to have sex in their later years? This is my third boyfriend over 40 at the last 10 years, and I started to be afraid of the thought, that I need ...
A. 3 July 2012: No. I've remained sexually active and I'm now age 64. I'll admit that I can't do what I could do in my youth, and the interest is not quite as much, but every man may be different. At my age, and single, the opportunities are less often, but I'm up ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend acts kind of strange about sex. Is he gay?
Q. My man prefers to masturbate while I am next to him sucking on his chest. I want him to have intercourse with me but he doesn't. He will only let me ride it and most of the time it is not that hard. He is 66 and I am 59. Do you think he might be ...
A. 3 July 2012: Probably not gay, but at his age, he's having a difficult time doing what he might have been able to do in the past. I'm 64-years-old, and still able to function, but not always, and certainly like in my youth. Many factors can figure-in when a man ... (read in full...)
I feel awful because he has slept with a lot more people than I have.
Q. I'm in a relationship with a much older man. I am 28, and he is 48. We have been together for six months. He told me yesterday that he has slept with about 35 people!. Do you think that's a lot, even for someone his age?. I lost my virginity to him, ...
A. 1 July 2012: Well I'm a much older man, now in my 60s. For 20 years of my life, I was married and faithful. And I was married and faithful very briefly twice before. But during my single years, there were many girlfriends and live-in lovers. Almost twice the ... (read in full...)
My sex drive has finished after a breakup, is that normal?
Q. hey me and my girlfriend split up about 4 months ago now I'm pretty good with it not 100 percent but I'm pretty happy,rediscovered my self identity etc.anyway my labido/sex drive has pretty much vanished,i literally don't have one anymore...is that ...
A. 28 June 2012: Yes, that can be normal for awhile.... (read in full...)
Slept with my best friend, now what?
Q. I have had a male best friend for 6 years. There has always been a sexual tension and we both have always been attracted to each other but have kept it platonic/ PG13 because I think we both knew we were scared and not ready to explore that side of ...
A. 26 June 2012: Well, I would hope that it does become a longterm relationship that possibly leads to marriage. Why not? You have stated many of the best things about a hopefully lifelong relationship, such as being best friends and enjoying each other's company. I ... (read in full...)
Is my boyfriend too dumb to pick up that I want sex?
Q. So im really annoyed at the fact that my bf rarely wants to have sex. Weve been together for 10 months and for like the first 6 months we were having sex multiple times a day and now its like maybe once a week. We dont really cuddle that much either ...
A. 24 June 2012: First off, I'm a much older man, but in my life, I've experienced times when sex was overshadowed by other things going on, such as work issues. Usually, however, in my personal experiences, sex has always been frequent with girlfriends and wives. ... (read in full...)
I still love my wife even though I've slept on the couch for the last 5 years. What should I do?
Q. dear cupid.I have a marige problem, and don,t know what two do.I have been married 2 my wife for all most 12yrs and it was good for the first five, or untill after her mother died, my wife is frim russia but met her here. are age,s are different I ...
A. 24 June 2012: Well, sir, you only have one life. What you have described is not the life that I would want to live. If I were you, I would be making arrangements for leaving, but I'm not you. I've left many women in my life, and many have left me - all for ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him I used to work as an escourt? How do I get over my intimacy issues?
Q. Background: I am 22 years old and am just graduating with a university degree and am going on to get my masters. When I was 18 and in my first year of university I was having some financial problems because I found out that I did not qualify for ...
A. 23 June 2012: 1. Yes, it would be dishonest not to tell. Who knows what he would think? Love can overcome a lot, but you indicate that this is a very new relationship - so love would not seem to be an issue at this time.
2. If told that a new girlfriend had been... (read in full...)
I masturbate and then don't want sex with my wife
Q. I don't seem to be sexually attracted to my wife very much. I'm not not sure if its a labido thing or what. I do masturbate to porn though when she's not around but as soon as she's back and wants sex I'm not interested. I do love her and want her ...
A. 21 June 2012: I'll agree that "person12345" is correct, but allow me to explain that in my youth, pornography was rare to most men and not at all so easily accessed as it is today. From the 1960s through most of the 1980s, a person had to go to extra lengths to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants oral sex, but I'm not confident about doing it. What should I do?
Q. My boyfriend always wants me to give him a bj and I don't really like doing it because I don't think I'm that great at it, so what do I do because I feel terrible not doing it for him but I don't want to stink at it, so any tips ? X...
A. 18 June 2012: Both "person12345" and "katiekate" offer some good advice, but I'll offer more from a man's point of view. I do especially like kisses and licks on the tip as kind of foreplay, then after a minute or so of that, her taking me (the penis) into her ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend barely lasts for 10 seconds during sex!!
Q. Me and my boyfriend had been having sex for 5 months now but we jus start dating back in march, hes sex is good and but he only lasts for maybe 10 seconds, what does that mean???? He always says sorry because he cums so fast, but i always say its ok ...
A. 15 June 2012: It probably means that he is offering you little, if any, foreplay and is focused more on his own satisfaction. In other words, he apparently knows little about pleasing a woman. It wold take a book to explain what he doesn't know, but in a ... (read in full...)
How do I get past caring for my ex?
Q. Hi me and my ex has been split for 7 n half months. I left him due tks his drinking problems basically i just had enough of the lies and bein let down all time. We have a daughter together and i have started dating. Thing is i still care about my ...
A. 14 June 2012: The best way to get past this is to develop a relationship with someone new. You say that you are dating again, so that's a start. Your problem may be complicated because, sharing parenthood of your daughter, you will likely have to see your ex for ... (read in full...)
Are my anxious fears about my future ability, to satisfy her, valid or invalid?
Q. I'm 19 years old, and my girlfriend and I have been together for almost two years. She and I are both virgins, and we both want to wait until we are married to each other to make love together. My penis is 6 inches long when completely erect. S...
A. 12 June 2012: Your size concern is totally unfounded. Just don't worry about it, dude.Your above reported average anyway, and other things, such as cunnilingus, can please most every woman all her life. Chill out. ... (read in full...)
Do men sleep with women just for the sex?
Q. Will men really sleep with a girl if they don't fancy them? Not talking about beer goggles time when drunk. Stone cold sober, pre meditated chatting someone up in the expectation of having sex?...
A. 10 June 2012: Well of course that happens, all the time and everywhere. But in my life, if a woman agreed to sexual favor, I was always open for more - and to see if there was possibility for a relationship. Often, there was, even if it began with a so-called ... (read in full...)
Dating 4 years, no sex in 14 months..I know he's cheating!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for 4 years. In the last 14 months we have not been sexually intimate with each other. He stopped coming around and spending quality time with me. All we do is talk on the phone. I've talked to him about my ...
A. 6 June 2012: That's a long time for a fairly young woman to go without intimacy. In my opinion, it would be time to get another boyfriend.... (read in full...)
We had sex after 3 weeks and there was hardly any semen! Does that mean my boyfriend is having sex with someone else?
Q. I have a sex question that I should probably know by now but don't - so here goes: My boyfriend and I had a huge fight . We went 3 weeks without having sex and finally we did. I expected him to orgasm right away but he didn't. When he finally ...
A. 6 June 2012: Volume of semen can vary. When I'm receiving frequent blow jobs from girlfriends, the volume increases considerably, but without, it diminishes with masturbation. Nevertheless, the production of semen is an ongoing process, but I think that it ... (read in full...)
Twenty years old and never had a boyfriend! What am I doing wrong?
Q. HELP!!!!! I'm 20 and never had a boyfriend. Long story short I have been asked out once before but I turned him down. Now a year and half later I feel regretful. I try to act like being single and for this long doesn't bother me but it does. I feel ...
A. 4 June 2012: And by the way, you may have to kiss a lot of frogs before you find your prince. But at 20-years-old, you are just a sapling with many years to grow. Just be careful out there. ... (read in full...)
Twenty years old and never had a boyfriend! What am I doing wrong?
Q. HELP!!!!! I'm 20 and never had a boyfriend. Long story short I have been asked out once before but I turned him down. Now a year and half later I feel regretful. I try to act like being single and for this long doesn't bother me but it does. I feel ...
A. 4 June 2012: Female responder "YouWish" makes excellent suggestions, but as a man, I might add that, when you do have some interest in a man, give him a bit more that a smile. If you know that he is unattached, pat him on the hand - tell him you like him. Good ... (read in full...)
How common is female ejaculation?
Q. Really interested in how common it is for women to ejaculate? I have never been a 'squirter' and I know guys definitely love it from posts I have seen online. Starting to feel now that I have a problem. I don't always orgasm with a guy either, ha...
A. 3 June 2012: The kind of ejaculation you are asking about is very uncommon, but I know that many woman do emit a small amount of fluid during an intense orgasm. It is typically too small an amount to notice.... (read in full...)
Does alcohol really make men lose their erection?
Q. Ok, does alcohol have that much affect on guys performance? Never had a bloke keep going soft on me before, ever. He said he has some viagra that he sometimes uses for when he's been drinking, but we didn't use it this time. I have had guys take ...
A. 3 June 2012: Yes, alcohol certainly can affect erectile ability, especially the older we get. When I was much younger, I could drink plenty of beer and still stay hard as a rock. Now in my 60s, and beginning perhaps 10 or 15 years ago, too much beer does affect ... (read in full...)
Are all women capable of having orgasms through intercourse? Anyone know a good technique?
Q. Are all women capable of having orgasms through intercourse? I think they say only a small percentage of women can orgasm just from intercourse. I'm 33 and it only happened once for me. I would love to figure out how to have more. I can climax from ...
A. 1 June 2012: It is true that most women rarely experience orgasm solely from vaginal penetration by a penis. Most say that it feels good, but usually no climax. It's almost like a design flaw. The clitoris, which is the focal point of sexual pleasure for a ... (read in full...)
Do guys my age automatically expect sex?
Q. Hey there! So, I'm 18 and I'm getting ready to head off to college soon. Like most kids (I guess some would consider me a "young adult"?) my age, I've been pondering the possibilities of what the future might bring. This includes relationships and ...
A. 30 May 2012: In all my many years, I've never really "expected" sex, but anticipated the possibility. I'd just go with the flow. If it came to that, which it usually did, then fine. If not, then the relationship would deteriorate because, over my more than 45 ... (read in full...)
In a very roundabout way - was this an orgasm?
Q. I'm 18 and my current bf is 19. We've been together 1 month (have known each other longer) and are about to move onto having sex together for the first time. (Skip this next part to actually get to the question, I'm sorry, I'm rambling!) Anyway...
A. 30 May 2012: I'll agree with AuntyAlexxmo here. This was either a small orgasm or very close to one. There is certainly nothing "wrong" with you. Masturbation is a healthy way to explore your sexuality and you should give it more activity. You are apparently old ... (read in full...)
Who is responsible for kids turning into drug addicts? The parenting? The genetics? Or just luck?
Q. Who is responsible for kids turning out drug addicts? The parenting? The genetics? Or just luck? This situation is ruining my life,and my marriage, and I feel ,Im not responsible for this, but the society is turning against us . It is very painful ...
A. 29 May 2012: Peer pressure. In other words, the influence of others their approximate age.... (read in full...)
How can a woman cure her fishy odor?
Q. I feel helpless, I am very clean, and been to my doctors and she tested me. every thing can back normal, no infections. My boyfriend has stop having sex with me, because he say i smell fishy real bad, when he pre-cums, and cums. he even gag's. He ...
A. 21 May 2012: In my experience with a few "fishy smelling" women, it seemed the main problem had to do with bacterial balance of the vagina. I don't think that yeast infection is the issue unless you have other indications, such as a white discharge, a white ... (read in full...)
How do I get him to give me more sex?
Q. I'm 33, my boyfriend is 31 and we've been together about 10 months. We only see each other on the weekend because we live an hour away from each other. He usually comes and stays at my place Friday night thru Sunday. Pretty much since the beginning ...
A. 21 May 2012: His talking about his past life may or may NOT be a big deal. I've been around the block too many times to mention, but I usually don't mention it to ladies. In my mind, it doesn't really matter, but some guys may wear it as a badge of sorts. The ... (read in full...)
When it comes to making love , I don't feel like before! Why has my feelings changed?
Q. hey there ! dear aunts, i really want some help on understanding myself..first of all i'd want to make it very clear that i love my boyfriend and that i love each and every quality about him. him , his behavior , his thinking and attitude towards ...
A. 20 May 2012: Two or three months, or even much more time, is not enough for you to feel that sex and intimacy will not get back to more exciting times. We all, women in particular, have cycles. Pardon me, but you are too young to get upset over a few months in ... (read in full...)
Is there such a thing as getting sex lessons?
Q. This is going to sound weird and bizzare but can you get sex lessons anyywhere? I'm not very cnfident in the bedroom and I'm currently single. but is there such thing as getting sex llessons like actal physical lessons but not prostitutes?...
A. 20 May 2012: Gee . . . I think you can get as much advice on this Web site as anywhere, but there must be thousands of online advice sites. On DearCupid, just use the search field to enter any possible term you can imagine. One other, in particular, is ... (read in full...)
How do you ask to have sex?
Q. When you meet a girl and you hook up (for this example kissing) how do you go further past kissing?! For example I went to a concert and I was a little drunk when i was talking to this girl I met. We danced and then we started to make out. I ...
A. 18 May 2012: Never in my many years (l'm now 64) did I ever be so blatant as to ask a woman for sex for the first time. That's just stupid and so uncool. All you do is make out, get her turned on, and if she wants more, it just happens. During the make out ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to have doubts in your relationship?
Q. Is it wrong to have doubts in your relationship? I love my boyfriend, very much, but I find myself second guessing things. We started out amazing! We both felt an instant click and in no time at all it was like we had known each other for years. The ...
A. 17 May 2012: Well, if you have so many things going for you, then give it a chance. But always remember that there will be ups and downs - and partners have to work through the differences. My twenties were just a learning experience for me, and I think it's ... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to have doubts in your relationship?
Q. Is it wrong to have doubts in your relationship? I love my boyfriend, very much, but I find myself second guessing things. We started out amazing! We both felt an instant click and in no time at all it was like we had known each other for years. The ...
A. 17 May 2012: Every relationship is going to have differences. Please pardon me for saying so, but you are very young. And you would think of me as being very "old" at age 64. But I respond to a few relationship issues in an attempt to help based upon those years ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend has no interest in sex whatsoever, is it wrong to consider breaking up with her?
Q. We've been together for 3 years, but this isn't the sort of thing where she gradually became less and less interested in sex... She's just always been pretty non-sexual, at least with me, anyway. We broke up for awhile about a year ago, and she had ...
A. 15 May 2012: Having read your posting at least three times, I must agree that sex just once every month or so, in your age bracket, would be very disappointing. All else, according to your posting, seems very nice. It would likely be too soon to move on, ... (read in full...)
I'm a 20 year old virgin...is that a turn off?
Q. I'm 20 years old and I'm in college. I've never had sex because I've never had a boyfriend and never wanted to sleep with random guys. No one ever believes me when I tell them I've never had sex mainly because I go out/party/drink a lot and ...
A. 14 May 2012: Your virginity is a virtue at this point in your life, as you will eventually know. Save it for the right man, and be very selective - this advice comes from someone (a man) who was extremely promiscuous in youth. Yes, it was fun, but resulted in ... (read in full...)
As you get older do you become more confident?
Q. Hello, i'm 15 years old and I want to lose my virginity but i'm extremely inconfident with girls and they don't seem interested in me anymore. I just need your advice and for you to answer a couple of my questions. 1.As you get older do you bec...
A. 14 May 2012: My answers to:
#! Yes, don't worry. It'll happen.
#2 Just be clean, groomed and confident - because even if you are not the most handsome or sexy guy around, your confidence as a "man" can overcome. You are now too young to be very confiden... (read in full...)
I managed to convince a guy I fancy that I'm easy but now I need the skills to back it up
Q. I moved about 9 months ago and there's this guy "Sam" back home. My friend and I tricked him into thinking I'm a slut and he likes me better now. I told him when I get home I'd make out with him and give him a hand job. The thing is, I HAVE NO IDEA ...
A. 14 May 2012: I'll have to agree with "Wisdom" that your approach to this is not a good idea, mainly the suggestion that you are a "slut." Why would that be good for you, even if untrue? It would seem obvious that you are infatuated by the guy, but his thinking ... (read in full...)
I'm 64. Is it normal that I still want sex?
Q. i am a woman of 64 and widowed. i last saw a man in my bed 3,5 yrs ago. i still want love and sex. is this normal. please dont give me moral answers. i know we all need love to the end of our lives. i want sex too. and with love cos i tie sex with ...
A. 13 May 2012: I'm also 64 and still enjoy sex - maybe not with the abilities in my youth, but me and my girlfriend do the best we can do.... (read in full...)
I want to give my b/f a bj for his birthday. Need advice
Q. hey, i'll try to keep this short so as not to take up your time. me and my boyfriend are quite intimate already, the only problem is, is that it's always my boyfriend doing everything, he's always pleasuring me (i say it's a problem!) But a...
A. 11 May 2012: Okay, well here are some "tips."
After whatever usual foreplay the two of you enjoy, be sure that he is aroused and erect. Whether he is or not, continue by fondling and stroking his member until it is up for it. Then sweetly move down, kissing his ... (read in full...)
How can I get my man hard?
Q. Hey, ok well I've been with my boyfriend for a few months now. And I love him so incredibly much. Well the problem is, that it always seems as if he has issues getting hard. But when he does finally get hard the sex is incredible. But I know he ...
A. 6 May 2012: Laying down can be an issue getting hard. Try massaging his member while he stands in front of you - applying kisses and licks as well. Standing in front of my woman during oral sex is also very stimulating in my experience.... (read in full...)
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