| Latest articles: How to avoid being used financially
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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30 October 2010: I have tried to keep my relationship problems away from this site as I do not want my advice to be assosiated to my own questions. However I have now learned an important lesson that I want to share with the rest of you, in the hopes that you will ...
What I've learned from my family.
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 June 2010: In order for aunts and question askers to see who they are getting advice from, I will continue to write some more about me, and where I come from. The things that I draw on when giving advice, what type of experience I have in life. This arti...
How one person changed my life
This question has 12 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 June 2010: I've been an aunt on this site now for quite a while, at first I started as an anonymous, until I finally took the step to make an account and dare to be identified somewhat. As I've gotten to know a few people on here, albeit still strangers ...
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Boyfriend doesn't try to impress me anymore
Q. my boyfriend and i have been together for a year and a half. Yesterday was our six month anniversary. Kind of a big deal. My sister ended up taking us out to eat. My problem is he doesn't try to impress me anymore. We do the same thing day in and...
A. 1 January 2011: Good for you! Spotting that you are incopatible can be hard, but when you're not a good match you're just not a good match so why waste any time with it. ... (read in full...)
A world away from my love
Q. At the beginning of this year I happened upon the woman of my dreams. Actually it was her parents that I met initially, we were both killing time during a particularly long airport layover and became good friends. We talked about our homes and fa...
A. 31 December 2010: As they say, if it's meant to be it's meant to be. If she does return your feelings why would she start seeing someone else? She'll keep a part of her heart for you only, so that when the time is right you can be a part of her life.
Thing... (read in full...)
Webcam Incident - scared,afraid,paranoid. help?
Q. Hello people, i was faced with two seperate incidents that happen over a year ago, close to two. Basically, i webcam-ed in msn with strangers from a chatroom. And you guessed it, i "over-exposed" myself during the short webcam session. Worst of all, ...
A. 31 December 2010: There is a chance it got recorded. But what can you do? It happened, you made a mistake, and now you wont do it again. Thats all you can do about it. And it will be pointless to worry about matters you can not do anything about. If you want to worry ... (read in full...)
5 years together and planning to move to another state, but we're having problems. Should I go?
Q. I've been together with my boyfriend for 5 years, not engaged, ugh, but I do love him very much. We lived together once around the 3 year mark and broke up because he wanted to spend every waking moment with me. I mean, I love him, but I needed ...
A. 31 December 2010: If you aren't sure about this then don't go. Basically that's it. I can't tell you things are going to be ok, I can't tell you this is normal and you just need to get used to it, and I can't tell you you should leave him either based on this ... (read in full...)
I don't know how this works...do couples tend to buy more expensive gifts for their partner through the years and discuss the price range??
Q. I just received the Christmas gift box my bf who I'm in an open relationship with sent from the US, I'm in the UK and he moved from the UK to Asia for a job. I'm from a culture in which we don't celebrate Christmas so this is the first Christmas ...
A. 31 December 2010: The price is not relevant when it comes to Christmas gift. Some will make an agreement on prices before hands BUT tha is only when gifts are made mandatory. For example if everyone in a school class are to get each other a gift it is common to set a ... (read in full...)
A world away from my love
Q. At the beginning of this year I happened upon the woman of my dreams. Actually it was her parents that I met initially, we were both killing time during a particularly long airport layover and became good friends. We talked about our homes and fa...
A. 31 December 2010: I have one question for you: does she love you back? You said she was shy, but what does that mean? Does it mean she loves you. but doesn't want a relationship, does it mean you don't really get to know her and so have no idea if she loves you back, ... (read in full...)
Do men who cheat love the women they are cheating on?
Q. A Gf of mine and i were having a debate about this question: Do men who cheat(whether they are married or not)do they love the women that they are either married to or live with? I told her that how in the world could any man say that they love...
A. 30 December 2010: A man is known to be able to be in love with one woman while sleeping with another. A woman is typically not willing to do such a thing. So perhaps in there lies the answer?
Another possibility is that people are different. What is possible... (read in full...)
18 year old ex broke my heart!
Q. I'm a 14 year old male and I reciantly got my heart broken by my 18 year old ex. I can't get over her, I cant date another girl without thinking about her. I could really use some ways to get over her so I can get on with my life....
A. 30 December 2010: Did you break up recently? In that case you really just need to let time pass. That is the only thing that will help. But it might ease the pain if you make sure you stay active and not get so much time to think about her. Get distracted by ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend doesn't try to impress me anymore
Q. my boyfriend and i have been together for a year and a half. Yesterday was our six month anniversary. Kind of a big deal. My sister ended up taking us out to eat. My problem is he doesn't try to impress me anymore. We do the same thing day in and...
A. 30 December 2010: I happen to think boredom isn't a "small" problem. It's a rather crucial point. At times things can slow down, but as this has turned into the regular style of the relationship I think it is fair to say things won't change any time soon. He's landed ... (read in full...)
Ladies is this a tear or something normal?
Q. This isn't a relationship question but a personal one. Ladies can you explain to be if this is normal. I have what I can only describe as 'ridges' on my vagina. The location is rather hard to explain, but they are on the mons pubis a little too the ...
A. 30 December 2010: I can't say I understand what you mean, nor have I seen anything that sound close to what you describe as ridges. If you have had them all your life and they are not painful or botehrsome, then I will assume they are normal. Everyone looks different ... (read in full...)
How long should you date before marriage?
Q. How long does anybody think they shoould be in a relationship before they ask to marry them? x...
A. 30 December 2010: Another important point: not only do you need to know the other person well, you also need to know yourself 100%! That is why young people are not adviced to marry because they often do not know themselves very well, or know what they want in life. ... (read in full...)
How long should you date before marriage?
Q. How long does anybody think they shoould be in a relationship before they ask to marry them? x...
A. 30 December 2010: The appropriate amount of time until you feel you know the person well enough, and that you know you can be happy with this person in marriage. In general I'd say no shorter than 2 years, but this depends on the couple. After 2 years you might find ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend going to move out because my mom asked for $100.00 a month
Q. I'm 20 years old. I live with my mother and father. I've been with my boyfriend for 2 years, and yesterday my mom asked if he would start giving her 100 dollars every 2 weeks to help pay for food and bills. He automatically said he wouldn't and that ...
A. 30 December 2010: I think your relationship is over. Im sorry to be harsh, but this speaks volumes of his character. First off all he SHOULD pay your mother money, really he should be paying way more than 200 dollars a months. Take a look at what he'd have to pay a ... (read in full...)
How can you tell when the guy is in it just for sex?
Q. How do you tell when a guy is only in it for the sex? How can you tell? I just want some advise on things that guys might do if they are only in it for the sex. ...
A. 30 December 2010: He never wants to meet up and do anything else but have sex, he always talks about sex or your body, he never wants to have a regular conversation with, and he wont be interested in you or give you attention unless you press your boobs in his face. ... (read in full...)
If a girl regularly wears tight clothes or shows skin, does that mean she may not be faithful in a relationship?
Q. OK, I may get flack for this, but the Agony Aunts have given me wise advice thus far so I will give my question a chance: In brief: If a girl you know dresses very immodestly, is that a red flag for a possible future relationship? ...
A. 30 December 2010: No there is no connection. Although there is a connection between culture/society/norm/location/behaviour. Look for all the signs. One factor alone will not determine whether she is not serious or not to be trusted. However as you familiarize ... (read in full...)
I want a baby so bad, but we can't have one.
Q. It breaks my heart to see all these young women on here pregnant and scared when there are people out there that want babies so bad and can't have them. I've been married for 5 years and we can't have kids. The adoption agency we spoke to said th...
A. 27 December 2010: Have you considered taking a loan in the bank? Or borrowing money from friends and family? If you work even though your husband earns a lot you will surely be better suited for a loan from the bank, or be better suited to repay your families if they ... (read in full...)
How should I prepare for being a teenage parent?
Q. okay thnx for the previous advice guys and yea everything is fine now, my parents were pretty stricken at first but after their shock they were very suppportive! our friends were all shocked but their great... just another question...what ...
A. 27 December 2010: To be there for your girlfriend you'll need to do a lot of errands, make sure you treat her well, even if you are tired you must not be lazy and still work hard. You should immediately figure out a plan on how to earn money/find a job, figure out ... (read in full...)
Do I move on? Or just stay friends?
Q. So, i'm in high school and I have a best friend and he's a guy. We text everyday and flirt. I've liked him for a little more than a year and he says he's liked me too off and on since last summer. Well since this past summer i've really fallen for ...
A. 27 December 2010: What pictures are we talking about here? Nudes? Do not ever sent nude pictures of yourself to anyone! Not even this boy that you love so much. If he loved you back the same he wouldn't be having another girlfriend, so do not let yourself get taken ... (read in full...)
What can I do to keep a girlfriend happy?
Q. i have a girlfriend and am scared that she may not want to go ahead in this relationship, so i want to keep her happy what can i do to keep my girlfriend happy? ...
A. 27 December 2010: Be a gentleman to her, carry her books, offer to do favours for her, take joy when you are able to help her out. Take her coat when she takes it off and hang it up for her, pamper her and make sure she's comfortable. Make her a cup of tea if she ... (read in full...)
Is my Fetish too Weird?
Q. this may seem weird but i'm 20 and a virgin. When i masturbate i like to wear girls panties. Is this a really weird thing to do? should i be really embarrased by this and learn to stop doing it?...
A. 27 December 2010: Fetishes are known for being odd. No fetish is logical, and it's a love it or hate it thing. Some have a fetish others will loose their appetite over, but that person again has a fetish someone else will wrinkle their nose over. Fetishes are ... (read in full...)
He talks about sex all day but just goes to sleep when the lights are out.
Q. My bf talks about having sex with me all day but when it's lights out he just falls asleep. Why?...
A. 27 December 2010: Some talk the talk, but can't walk the walk. Talk to him about it if this bothers you. Maybe he's a virgin? Have you ever had sex? Maybe he wants to wait for a special occasion? Does he have problems maintaining an erection? ... (read in full...)
Why don't babyboomers want their adult children to leave home?
Q. This seems to be a common problem. I know I have this problem and from other posts here, I'm not alone. I utterly hate it how the media often portrays us young adults as slackers and child- adults, it makes me mad. I actually want to leave home and ...
A. 27 December 2010: How do you know they dont? Maybe they do it when you're not looking. Anyway, parents typically will want their children to move out. If your parents don't want you to leave then ok, but that doesn't mean you are forced to stay. You are free to move ... (read in full...)
Can taking one birth control pill before your period mess up your cycle and make you more fertile?
Q. So I havent had sex since Feb 2010 because my boyfriend had went away for a while. And while he was gona I stopped taking my birth control. So he came home Dec 15 2010 and I was expecting my period that and I didnt want to be on it because I wanted ...
A. 25 December 2010: I'd still take a pregnancy test just to be sure. Periods can be unreliable to trust. My mother for example got her period while pregnant with me and didn't realize until 5 months in. If you for example drink or take birth control during pregnancy it ... (read in full...)
Is anal Masturbation a sin?
Q. Is anal masturbation a sin? I recently found out how awesome it is, but I really want to know if it is a sin or not...help please?...
A. 24 December 2010: Do you consider it a sin to masturbate? In that case anal masturbation is a sin as well. If you think masturbation is allowed, then I will think anal stimulation is allowed as well. What religion do you belong to? Ask your religious leader about ... (read in full...)
Can taking one birth control pill before your period mess up your cycle and make you more fertile?
Q. So I havent had sex since Feb 2010 because my boyfriend had went away for a while. And while he was gona I stopped taking my birth control. So he came home Dec 15 2010 and I was expecting my period that and I didnt want to be on it because I wanted ...
A. 24 December 2010: And buy a pregnancy test just in case. If you do happen to be pregnant you'll want to know as soon as possible. Chances are low that you are pregnant, but those % wont help you much if you're the lucky winner of a baby.
The guide on how to use a... (read in full...)
Can taking one birth control pill before your period mess up your cycle and make you more fertile?
Q. So I havent had sex since Feb 2010 because my boyfriend had went away for a while. And while he was gona I stopped taking my birth control. So he came home Dec 15 2010 and I was expecting my period that and I didnt want to be on it because I wanted ...
A. 24 December 2010: Your period got delayed by 3 days because of that one pill you took? I am actually not sure at all about how much more fertile or not you'd be, as this isn't exact science. You could get pregnant while on your period as well, although it's ... (read in full...)
A blog post convinced me that I'm being used
Q. I've been seeing a guy and we were together about 4 months, split up for about 2 but kept in contact and are now sort of back together. altogether we've known each other for about 7 months and I haven't slept with him though he has asked me and he ...
A. 23 December 2010: "it feels like someone is forcing me to look at something i already knew was there but trying to avoid."
I think your gut is spot on! Always follow your gut instincts, and when they are telling you you should watch out, then by all means watch ou... (read in full...)
Is it okay to go back on the contraceptive pill?
Q. Hey guys, my boyfriend and I broke up about a month ago after being together for just over a year. When we broke up I came off my pill, however in the past week we've been meeting up and having sex in his car. What I want to know Is there any ...
A. 23 December 2010: You can start on the pill again at any time you wish to. The only rule is that if you start on day 1 of your period you are protected from that day on. If you start any other day you need to take the pill for 7-8 days before you are protected.
... (read in full...)
Would society think our relationship is wrong?
Q. i know that this may sound wrong okay but here goes. i am 16 he is 27 we are in love okay and i no that may sound naive but we have been in a strong relationship for about 8 months i am almost 17. well we have a lot of respect for each other a...
A. 23 December 2010: You wont like my answer, it's not pretty. But I will be honest with you, fully aware that I can be judgmental. I wouldn't tell a person this to their face, but this is what I'd think to myself.
It's just that it's so typical of a grown man to d... (read in full...)
Now that I can have sex again, I need some tips on how to have good sex!
Q. Hey everyone, I have a unique question. I've been with my boyfriend for nearly seven years now and we've never had a fully functional sex life. Sex has always been too painful for me, until I had an operation last year when the doctor finally ...
A. 23 December 2010: You really need to explore this on your own. I suggest you start out with what you are used to and get to know the difference and new feel of it. Take it slow, don't jump into anything crazy, but work through the first 3-5 normal positions before ... (read in full...)
Why is my taste in women is so indiscriminate and I'm married as well
Q. Why do I want to be with almost every girl I meet. I have a wife and she is great. But, from time to time I would like to be with other girls. Whats up with that??...
A. 22 December 2010: You have a fluctuating mind, you are restless and intrigued easily, curious by nature perhaps. It is the way you are. Looking and imagining is far from doing it though. I imagine you often day dream and fantasize, have good imagination perhaps?
... (read in full...)
Can people tell when you're no longer a virgin?
Q. is it true that people can tell when you are not a virgin anymore? if so how? (besides a torn hemen; like a vibe)...
A. 22 December 2010: no... (read in full...)
What did my boyfriend mean when he said he loved me "Because you need to feel like someone loves you." ?
Q. A few days ago, my boyfriend and I were cuddling and he asked me why I love him. I answered "Because I think we are meant to be together." I asked him the same question and he said "Because you need to feel like someone loves you." I asked him what ...
A. 22 December 2010: I don't know what it means, but it doesn't sound good. I advice you to have a serious talk and not be afraid to hear the honest truth, it might not be what you want to hear. But it is better to hear it now than later.
My first take at it thought ... (read in full...)
Can people tell when you're no longer a virgin?
Q. is it true that people can tell when you are not a virgin anymore? if so how? (besides a torn hemen; like a vibe)...
A. 22 December 2010: A person who has sex with you will typically be able to tell you are a virgin or not based on your experience. But a random person on the street can't tell. You may also expose yourself if you talk about details of sex that a virgin wouldn't ... (read in full...)
Why don't babyboomers want their adult children to leave home?
Q. This seems to be a common problem. I know I have this problem and from other posts here, I'm not alone. I utterly hate it how the media often portrays us young adults as slackers and child- adults, it makes me mad. I actually want to leave home and ...
A. 22 December 2010: Pinktopaz also said some people have to be on their own from 18... well a lot have to stand on their own feet from 15 in my country. We often have to move away from home to go to high school, and I too moved when I was 16, first year of high school. ... (read in full...)
Why don't babyboomers want their adult children to leave home?
Q. This seems to be a common problem. I know I have this problem and from other posts here, I'm not alone. I utterly hate it how the media often portrays us young adults as slackers and child- adults, it makes me mad. I actually want to leave home and ...
A. 22 December 2010: Why aren't you moving out exactly? If they swear your head off by you mentioning it then surely that is just another good reason to move out? If they talk to you as if you are a child, then that too would be a good reason to move out? So why aren't ... (read in full...)
He has herpes...Did he cheat???
Q. I am asking for help on here because I don't want to tell my friends about this. My fiance was just diagnosed with herpes. I have been with my him for 5 years. We got engaged a year ago. He goes to school 100 miles away and comes home on ...
A. 22 December 2010: Yes what type of herpes does he have and where? And has he been regularly tested for this before or not? Because if this is the first time in 5 years he's been tested for it then it could be he's had it all through the relationship with you, or ... (read in full...)
If I'm someone he would consider dating in the future, then why would he suggest us being FWB now??
Q. hello i have a quick question, iv been on and off talking to a guy while going through a difficult time trying to decide whether or not to just let my relationship go or patch things up. this new boy knows this and trys to tell me to let it go for a ...
A. 22 December 2010: This guy wants a test ride with you for free. Thats basically it. And yeah right, I can promise you he's giving the same line to the other girls he's chatting with, if he's not already banging them. ... (read in full...)
My friend copies all my clothes!
Q. Hi~ So my friend just copies everything from hollister I own. I had a blue striped hollister shirt, and she said exactly in my face "Oh I like that shirt, I'm gonna buy it." I didn't want her to copy it becasue I liked it a lot so I said "No, ...
A. 22 December 2010: Someone "copying" your style is not an offense dear you. Thats where I think you got it wrong. It's a complement. You're not supposed to get angry at her for it, you're supposed to say "oh you like it? I got it from (insert place), it cost that ... (read in full...)
My friend copies all my clothes!
Q. Hi~ So my friend just copies everything from hollister I own. I had a blue striped hollister shirt, and she said exactly in my face "Oh I like that shirt, I'm gonna buy it." I didn't want her to copy it becasue I liked it a lot so I said "No, ...
A. 22 December 2010: Someone "copying" your style is not an offense dear you. Thats where I think you got it wrong. It's a complement. You're not supposed to get angry at her for it, you're supposed to say "oh you like it? I got it from (insert place), it cost that ... (read in full...)
Is a hollywood wax a bad idea?
Q. I want to get a hollywood wax [all hair off] but I have mega sensitive skin and a low pain threshold. Bad idea girls?...
A. 22 December 2010: Bad idea. But call them first to ask about it, often you can get a test-wax on your leg or somewhere else on your body to see if you react to the waxing. The test will only cover a small area and is just to check that you aren't reacting badly. ... (read in full...)
My friend copies all my clothes!
Q. Hi~ So my friend just copies everything from hollister I own. I had a blue striped hollister shirt, and she said exactly in my face "Oh I like that shirt, I'm gonna buy it." I didn't want her to copy it becasue I liked it a lot so I said "No, ...
A. 22 December 2010: You can't control what other people will wear!! Several more than your friend buys the exact same clothes as you and wear them everyday, if they didn't the stores would go bankrupt.
I suggest if you really need to have something that only you... (read in full...)
She's totally ignoring the fact that I sent her three messages!
Q. I'd like some advice please regarding a potential new relationship. A new girl started at work a few months ago. We get on really well, and have been getting to know each other. I recently suggested going out and we arranged it for the day afte...
A. 22 December 2010: There's a simple solution: ask her if she got the texts. If it bothers you this much. You could say "by the way, I hope you weren't feeling too bad at the hospitals, I sent you a couple of texts to check in on you." If you word it right you should ... (read in full...)
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