New here? Register in under one minute   Already a member? Login239981 questions, 1061739 answers  

  DearCupid.ORG relationship advice
  Got a relationship, dating, love or sex question? Ask for help!Search
 New Questions Answers . Most Discussed Viewed . Unanswered . Followups . Forums . Top agony aunts . About Us .  Articles  . Sitemap
*ylerSage agony aunt


United States  (Male   XML/RSS

Like what he writes?
... Add *ylerSage to your favourite agony aunts

Want to get in touch?
... Send *ylerSage a private message

*ylerSage's Ratings

Rating: 8

12345Next > [5 pages, 157 answers]

I hate my boyfriend’s best friend and don’t want him at my wedding!

Q.   I got engaged to my boyfriend and we are currently planning the wedding, making guest lists etc. My partner wishes to invite his best friend to the wedding. The thing is i can’t stand being in the same room as my fiancées best friend as he severely ...

A.   21 June 2018: It's not just your wedding, it's also your boyfriend's wedding. If you dislike his friend so much that you want him out of the wedding how will it determine his inclusion in the rest of your lives. Something like this needs to be talked about... (read in full...)

How can my boyfriend love me when I think I can't keep up?

Q.   My boyfriend has quite a bit of intelligence, and I find it to be quite an attractive trait. All the same, a lot of his discussions and debates go over my head. When I see him talking with others who can carry the conversation, he always seems so ...

A.   16 June 2018: Lots of people feel happy when they go fishing, or ride bikes, or read books, or play a game. Just because one thing or activity is delectable to them doesn't mean everything else in their lives is worthless and dismal. If he's as smart as you say... (read in full...)

Why did he throw the gifts in the trash?

Q.   ok my ex boyfriend of 6 years when we met we were both 45 it’s weird cause I just had a broke up wasn’t looking and he was on Facebook I didn’t wanta like him I had just lost a lot of weight cause I had my first child only child so I was very ...

A.   10 June 2018: Once you give someone a gift, you can't control what they do with it. You found out he has been throwing your gifts away; the best approach to this would be to stop giving him gifts...simple. He's made it clear he's a piece of shit. He could e... (read in full...)

My boyfriend says if I don't lose weight after our baby's birth he will dump me!

Q.   I am 24 weeks pregnant. My boyfriend is constantly calling me fat. He says he is teasing. He also said that if I don't lose the weight after the baby is born he will dump me. I have taken all these things to heart. I was really skinny before I got ...

A.   10 June 2018: I think you should back-track a bit and focus on the magnitude of your insecurities here. Your boyfriend, called you fat...which is technically true...because you're pregnant. The comment about him dumping you sounds a tad bit passive-aggressive but ... (read in full...)

I moved to another city to be away from my ex and I found him here

Q.   Hi There, I broke up with my ex 2 months ago, It was a one and half year relationship, It was impossible to me to get better unless I move to another city, I hated the city that we were living in, I hated every single street in it, and everythi...

A.   9 June 2018: How do you know your ex lives there? Maybe it was just a coincidence and he was visiting the area. You're actually thinking moving again just because you saw him. You shouldn't allow others to have so much control over your actions. Responding the ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend often tells me small lies, how do I get him to stop?

Q.   Been tigether 2 years and the past 6 months my boyfriend has the tendancy to change his stories often and its getting to a point where Im always get upset and angry and then we end up in a big argument. Theyre usually small pointless ones, but if he ...

A.   8 June 2018: He said it himself, he worries about your reaction. It seems you could go just about anywhere in the world and find a frustrated wife or girlfriend complaining about the lying men in their lives. I think the real question here is: "Why does the... (read in full...)

I think she thinks we are in a full-blown relationship!

Q.   DearCupid, I've been good friends with this girl for 2 years. We hang out on a pretty regular basis with our group of friends. One night she told me she liked me over text messages. I told her I liked her too. We talked about setting up a dat...

A.   7 June 2018: I agree with @HoneyPie. The sooner you talk to her the better. Let her know that she's moving a bit too fast and you're still working out your feelings towards her before things get complicated and tense. Just move slow and privately on your fee... (read in full...)

Should I text him again or do you think he decided not to meet up with me?

Q.   I have a friend who has a gay friend I've met him several times, she ask him if I could tex him, he said sure, we did ,about a month ago, I sent him three tex,s , then I didn't, here back from him, he said we could meet for coffee, I said that would ...

A.   7 June 2018: Seeing that he hasn't responded to any of the texts that you sent to him and you can confirm that he got them, it seems that he isn't interested. Since that approach didn't work maybe you could just ask your friend to find out if he would be ... (read in full...)

Why hold a grudge for 3 years, after a crush wasn’t reciprocated?

Q.   If someone who had a crush on another person, felt rejected by that person, why would they hold a grudge after 3 years? They did not ask the person out. But dropped "I love you" lines here and there. But this was not taken seriously. So this other ...

A.   7 June 2018: Hurt people, hurt people... Not to mention this guy was rejected 3 years ago, has moved on to another relationship and still treats the rejecter like she's invisible or insignificant. This shows that the person is REALLY REALLY hurt by the reje... (read in full...)

Should I tell him I want him to propose?

Q.   I have a question do I risk ruining everything and admit to my boyfriend that I want him to propose or keep my mouth shut until he’s ready to ask me himself ? Both 26 been together 11 years he’s the kindest sweetest most amazing person I have eve...

A.   6 June 2018: It sounds like he loves you very much. Although 11 years is a long time you need to realise that you've been together since your teenage years when he couldn't provide as much. As a man, he is probably waiting on more financial stability before ... (read in full...)

How can I handle the monotony and boredom of everyday life?

Q.   How can I handle the monotony and boredom of everyday life.:? Days off have no purpose, but I go to gym, I get a coffee, I see a movie.. Me alone and counting the hours til bedtime.....

A.   6 June 2018: It sounds as if you're waiting for something.... Don't fool yourself into thinking a prince will come and sweep you off your feet like in those Hollywood movies. I once read a book by Steven Chandler called "Reinventing Yourself" which ... (read in full...)

Do I tell my wife about my bisexuality?

Q.   Hi everyone, I'm a male in my mid-30's and married, but I want to be able to admit to myself that I may be bi-sexual. I'm attracted to men like I am to women, but I love watching gay anal and shemale porn as well as straight porn. I have also had ...

A.   6 June 2018: If it has reached a point where you feel guilty and isolated because of your new found sexuality it is understandable that you wish to share your growth with the ones you love. However, you may have to come to terms with the fact that should you ... (read in full...)

Is it really a big deal that I didn't call?

Q.   I’ve been dating this guy (no official relationship) for a few months. We were old friends who got really close and started a romance. He did the chasing and I finally caught feelings after a while. We would hang out all the time. He would call me ...

A.   3 June 2018: It's possible he could have borderline personality disorder. People with the condition tend to be very hot and cold with people. One minute they love you the next minute they hate your guts. The fact that you apologized for hurting his feelings ... (read in full...)

I’ve made an ultimatum for my cheating husband. Is it reasonable?

Q.   Hello Cupids, Short question. My husband, who I have been with for 13 years, compulsively cheats on me. Last time, I kicked him out and begged him to get therapy, which he said he would. He didn’t, but kept telling me he planned to. Things got b...

A.   31 May 2018: Someone who truly loves you would never repeatedly put themselves in a situation which could cause them to loose you. The man blatantly has keepsakes from his lovers in your face for crying out loud. You cannot control the actions of others, ... (read in full...)

My superiors kept me in the dark about an employee's recent transfer

Q.   Hello Aunts and Uncles, This is not a romance question, it‘s work-related. I’m a department supervisor in a mid-sized company. Long story short, I’ve just learned that one of the employees I manage, and who was hired only 3 months ago, applied fo...

A.   29 May 2018: First things first, you aren't aware of the knowledge or relationship this guys has with upper management, for all you know those nude photo jokes could have some truth to them. His dad could be friends with them. They could all come from the same ... (read in full...)

Should I remain single or take a chance on this guy?

Q.   Hi. I'm a single mum, 36 years old, I've been single for about 6.5 years. I've dated in that time but last date was over 2/3 years ago. I'm considering staying single forever, I'm not good at relationships and I don't like who I become. But I st...

A.   29 May 2018: You're already allowing your expectations to ruin your date. Don't expect anything from this man. Don't expect him to be kind, or to be polite or to ask you on a second date or to open your door for you, or pull out your chair, or to be a compl... (read in full...)

Should I lie and say the baby is his?

Q.   Ive made a mess but now ive got to grow up and sort it out. Me and my 'ex'boyfriend had a break , we didnt say what each other can or cant do and if we were going to get back together. I had a feeling he was seeing someone else but just left him to ...

A.   28 May 2018: You're literally asking us if you should lie in a huge and potentially catastrophic way to avoid the TRUTH from crushing your ex? What exactly do you think the end result will be after the next 18 years when he finds out? Provided you even tell him ... (read in full...)

Help! I’ve fallen for my friend, but I don’t know what to do about it!

Q.   I was hoping if a female mind would be able to help out here because I'm in love with my best friend and I don't know if she feels the same way. I'm 23 and never had a proper relationship before so not terribly experienced! However, met thi...

A.   26 May 2018: Couple of issues here. First things first, she has a boyfriend, second things second, she has a crush on another guy, third things third she ignores you when she's with the know, the same controlling one you THINK she isn't really ... (read in full...)

Two people in as little as a week have brought me to a choice, and it's tearing me apart.

Q.   For someone bisexual who hasn't had any experience in dating or relationships, I've suddenly been forced with a choice. A woman at work has taken interest in me, and we talk every now and then. Surprisingly, she asked me out on a date. She's nice ...

A.   18 May 2018: It's called dating, and it's not illegal. Don't speak ill of your good fortune. First you had no one and now you have more than enough. See the good in it. Bask it in a bit. I don't see why you can't date both and use the experiences to determin... (read in full...)

Did my boyfriend snub my son by not saying goodbye to him?

Q.   Something is bugging me. I drove my boyfriend to work today. His car is in the shop and he doesn't live with me. My 13 year-old son was in the car too. After I dropped off my boyfriend, I was going to drop my son off at school. Well, my boyfr...

A.   18 May 2018: I think this question stems from you own intuition. It appears you have some reason to believe that your boyfriend doesn't show particular interest in your son and you're worried about it. Mind you, you can't force you bf to bond with your son... (read in full...)

My husband found some screenshots from my sim game!

Q.   My husband is jealous of a dating Sim (similar to otome) visual novel romance game. Recently he came across some pictures I'd saved of one of the sex scenes between the sprites (it's all dialogue) to show to my friend. He got mad that 1) I had ...

A.   18 May 2018: This doesn't sound all that different from a romance novel girls love reading. The only difference here is that you have complete control over the affairs of the characters and you have visuals. It's like playing with dolls. As long as you can ... (read in full...)

He ended our friendship because I loved him as a friend only. He sent me a message yesterday after 3 months. Do I reply?

Q.   Me and my ex guy friend have been friends for years. He started to have feelings for me and he did confess to me that he wants to be more than friends. However, i don't see us being together and i dont share the same feelings with him. I rejected ...

A.   16 May 2018: This can go one of two ways. Either the two of you continue being just friends OR you become a couple. If you refuse to be his girlfriend and he refuses to be just friends then there is a problem. The two of you, unfortunately, have outgrown ea... (read in full...)

He says I’m loose! Help!

Q.   I'm a virgin and today my boyfriend tired putting a bit of his dick inside and he said later that its very loose, I've never played with myself or let anyone else, no one has entered a finger inside me still he's saying this. can anyone please h...

A.   16 May 2018: It could be a means of manipulation. Guy tells you you have a loose vagina, it keeps you spiralling into a frenzy, you start feeling insecure about yourself and fear you might loose him as a bf. In turn you make every effort to please him and g... (read in full...)

I am upset at how he dealt with Mother’s Day! What would you do in my shoes?

Q.   Hello. My bf and I are 35, cohabitating. We have kids but not with each other although I am quite close with his. I was really upset on mother’s day because I woke up to an empty, messy house but a gift and cards left out. Apparently he thought the ...

A.   16 May 2018: The issue here is that instead of highlighting all the pros in your day you focused on all the cons. You woke up to a gift from your loved ones, many woman yearn to be a mother but were not fortunate enough to have kids, you had the house to ... (read in full...)

I love her and really don't feel like breaking up. How can I handle this situation?

Q.   I'm in a relationship with a girl for more than a year now. At first it was all going really well but then in last few months we have not stopped fighting. This is frustrating and it's taking A toll on this relationship. She has this habit of over ...

A.   7 May 2018: We have little to no control over the actions of others, however we do have control over ourselves. Put into the relationship the energy you want to see flourish in it. When she gets antsy and starts screaming, keep calm, answer her questions, s... (read in full...)

I’ve given up drinking! How do I tell my friend before his bachelor party?

Q.   When I was in my early 20s and mid 20s, I was a heavy drinker. I would not considered myself an alcoholic but I was a drunk. After a really bad experience about six years ago (I was lucky I did not die from alcohol poisoning), I decided that I ...

A.   7 May 2018: Do you means bad manners to tell him? Or bad manners to not attend? Think of it as a test to discover how far you've come as a person. You're bound to be around alcohol and people who drink at some time or another. Why not suggest that you chaperone ... (read in full...)

How can I attract positive people in my life?

Q.   What is wrong with me that I am attracting these types of people ? My girls friends (envious- backstabbing - opportunist - gossip rider females-) so I learned my lesson and then I stopped hanging out with them. I noticed though even when I don’t tr...

A.   6 May 2018: I came across this video today on YouTube. It may be of help to you: ... (read in full...)

We are having a baby but he refuses to talk about marriage

Q.   My boyfriend and I of seven months are now having a baby. It was not planned. He talks about a future with me. He has been married before. I have also. He never wants to get married again. He wants to get a home together. He has told me he ...

A.   5 May 2018: Marriage is just a means of exalting ownership that's why divorce rates are skyrocketing these days. You'd be surprised how many relationships last longer when they don't tie the knot because, i think, the mindset that "this person doesn't belong to ... (read in full...)

Should I report a teacher for teaching 7 year olds about sex?

Q.   3 days ago my 7 year old daughter came to my house asking me about why guys can only wear condoms, she was too curious to know more about sex and the male genital. I was shocked how she knew the word condom, from who and why she is asking me this ...

A.   2 May 2018: Innocence doesn't last forever. Puberty can start as easily as 6 years old in children. The truth shouldn't be punished simply because it makes one uncomfortable or threatens their ego. The children of today are like super computers. Many ... (read in full...)

Should I ignore the photos found on his laptop?

Q.   Hi there I was looking for a movie on my husband's laptop and instead found a folder of celebrity nudes he downloaded at the same time. I'm a bit shaken. I don't mind if he watches porn, but most of these photos are ones which would have been ...

A.   29 April 2018: Porn is a fantasy. Many men watch it. It's similar to romance novels women tend to read, but men prefer seeing things while women like to...feel and emerge in things. Don't make this about you or your appearance. Think of it as more of a weird ho... (read in full...)

Is it fair to let past experiences influence tis relationship?

Q.   I've been seeing a guy for about a month now and we started to talk about the future and what the relationship is and he tells me that last summer he was accused of raping his ex. At the time he was telling me with I had just had consensual sex w...

A.   28 April 2018: In all honesty, when exactly does an accused rapist bring up a story like this to his new girlfriend? This guy had the to choice to either tell you or not to tell you. I think the average man would NOT bring it up. Deny it if they could. But he t... (read in full...)

Long time friend wants to be more than friends.

Q.   Hello agony aunts. Im facing some troubles and dealing with my guy friend's behavior towards me. My guy friend is being cold, sarcastic and mean to me in the past few weeks. Okay well let me start with this, he actually loves me, he told me before ...

A.   27 April 2018: For the sake of clarity for both the OP and "anonymous female" bear in mind this is from the mindset of another man. It's like this male friend is walking around with a huge booger hanging from his nose.His female friend assures him that their's... (read in full...)

Long time friend wants to be more than friends.

Q.   Hello agony aunts. Im facing some troubles and dealing with my guy friend's behavior towards me. My guy friend is being cold, sarcastic and mean to me in the past few weeks. Okay well let me start with this, he actually loves me, he told me before ...

A.   27 April 2018: He's acting this way because the two of you have been friends for years. He knows everything about you, you know everything about him, you both get along fine and enjoy each other's company, however, the minute he suggests the two of you become more ... (read in full...)

We've split up,he wants me to move out.

Q.   Hi Dear Cupid. I have been in a relationship for three and a half years and my partner split up with me once more and said we are done and that we can still be friends....does friends work? We still live together, are sleeping separately and ...

A.   27 April 2018: You can't heal in the same place you got hurt. You said it's killing you, you must be in a world-wind of emotions right now. I'm getting the impression you haven't vented your frustration with him. Her sounds like a bit of an a-hole. I feel lik... (read in full...)

He canceled our second date and hasn’t rescheduled! Should I ask him why or just forget him?

Q.   Two weeks ago I met a guy and we had a great date, he asked for a second date while we were still out so we made plans to meet up the following week. The day of our second date he cancelled because he had a cold so I didn't think anything of that, I ...

A.   24 April 2018: Patience grasshopper. It's only been a week. Chances are he's still sick. He'll probably need at least two weeks to fully recover. Feeling better doesn't mean he's no longer sick. How would you feel sitting across a table at a restaurant while she's ... (read in full...)

Their Grandma wont drop the subject, what do I do?

Q.   A few years ago, my sister-in-law's grandmother and her boyfriend went to Alaska on a vacation (the boyfriend is now decease). We talked about Alaska and I mentioned to her that Alaska is my dream vacation. I did my research and realize how much...

A.   24 April 2018: I'm pretty sure besides the link she shares between you and your brother, she has very little to talk to you about. Your love for Alaska seems to be the only thing of interest you two seem to share. She's an old woman, with probably very few people ... (read in full...)

Why doesn't my heart race when I kiss my boyfriend?

Q.   So I'm in a bit of a dilemma. I have dated 3 guys (and have kissed all of the ) and the guy I am with at the moment is my first love, we have kissed many times but my heart doesn't race like his does. The first guy I dated took my first kiss, and I ...

A.   22 April 2018: Different people respond in different ways to different events. Don't start building a fantasy or comparing how you may respond to kissing someone else to feel confident in it. Don't allow Hollywood to hoodwink you into how infatuation or love ... (read in full...)

How can I fix the relationship I have with my mother?

Q.   It's rare me and my mother ever have an emotional, bonding conversation; I try and start a conversation with her but she just says "Yeah" or "Mhmm" or something to cut the conversation short. The only time we actually have a conversation is when ...

A.   4 April 2018: There's a VERY GOOD CHANCE your mom has narcissistic personality disorder. I know because EVERY SINGLE THING you wrote in your letter here today were the SAME THINGS I experienced growing up with my mother....and some... I am so happy and gratef... (read in full...)

My husband is disappointed because I didn't tell him about a job interview

Q.   Hi guys I feel really terrible about lying to my husband about a recent job interview I had. Two weeks ago I applied for a job (he knew I had been looking) and got called for the interview and thankfully got it. However I didn't tell my husband ...

A.   4 April 2018: I don't get why he would say he can't trust you again, that sounds a bit over-the-top for something as simple as a job interview. If anything he sounds a bit whiny. I just hope he isn't the manipulative type who's intentionally trying to make y... (read in full...)

My boyfriend ridiculed me saying that I have small boobs and a big tummy!

Q.   Dear cubid, The other day my bf of 2 years and i were video chating and i was wearing a tank top without a bra so he made a comment saying " ur boobs need serious help why doesn't the fat from ur stomach go up to ur boobs , just rotate the fat" ...

A.   3 April 2018: So he made a joke about your tiny breasts and bloated stomach, big deal? You should've just told him his penis was small and that you're leaving him for his brother then have a good laugh and get over it. I'll admit, the joke did sound a tad bit ... (read in full...)

*ylerSage's friends

These are mutual friends, so *ylerSage has added them and they have added *ylerSage!

mystiquek agony auntmystiquek
N91 agony auntN91

All Content Copyright (C) DearCupid.ORG 2004-2008 - we actively monitor for copyright theft