I love her and really don't feel like breaking up. How can I handle this situation?
Q. I'm in a relationship with a girl for more than a year now. At first it was all going really well but then in last few months we have not stopped fighting. This is frustrating and it's taking A toll on this relationship. She has this habit of over ...
A. 7 May 2018: We have little to no control over the actions of others, however we do have control over ourselves. Put into the relationship the energy you want to see flourish in it. When she gets antsy and starts screaming, keep calm, answer her questions, s... (read in full...)
I’ve given up drinking! How do I tell my friend before his bachelor party?
Q. When I was in my early 20s and mid 20s, I was a heavy drinker. I would not considered myself an alcoholic but I was a drunk. After a really bad experience about six years ago (I was lucky I did not die from alcohol poisoning), I decided that I ...
A. 7 May 2018: Do you means bad manners to tell him? Or bad manners to not attend? Think of it as a test to discover how far you've come as a person. You're bound to be around alcohol and people who drink at some time or another. Why not suggest that you chaperone ... (read in full...)
How can I attract positive people in my life?
Q. What is wrong with me that I am attracting these types of people ? My girls friends (envious- backstabbing - opportunist - gossip rider females-) so I learned my lesson and then I stopped hanging out with them. I noticed though even when I don’t tr...
A. 6 May 2018: I came across this video today on YouTube. It may be of help to you:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=axICb_RvGQU
... (read in full...)
We are having a baby but he refuses to talk about marriage
Q. My boyfriend and I of seven months are now having a baby. It was not planned. He talks about a future with me. He has been married before. I have also. He never wants to get married again. He wants to get a home together. He has told me he ...
A. 5 May 2018: Marriage is just a means of exalting ownership that's why divorce rates are skyrocketing these days. You'd be surprised how many relationships last longer when they don't tie the knot because, i think, the mindset that "this person doesn't belong to ... (read in full...)
Should I report a teacher for teaching 7 year olds about sex?
Q. 3 days ago my 7 year old daughter came to my house asking me about why guys can only wear condoms, she was too curious to know more about sex and the male genital. I was shocked how she knew the word condom, from who and why she is asking me this ...
A. 2 May 2018: Innocence doesn't last forever. Puberty can start as easily as 6 years old in children. The truth shouldn't be punished simply because it makes one uncomfortable or threatens their ego. The children of today are like super computers. Many ... (read in full...)
Should I ignore the photos found on his laptop?
Q. Hi there I was looking for a movie on my husband's laptop and instead found a folder of celebrity nudes he downloaded at the same time. I'm a bit shaken. I don't mind if he watches porn, but most of these photos are ones which would have been ...
A. 29 April 2018: Porn is a fantasy. Many men watch it. It's similar to romance novels women tend to read, but men prefer seeing things while women like to...feel and emerge in things.
Don't make this about you or your appearance. Think of it as more of a weird ho... (read in full...)
Is it fair to let past experiences influence tis relationship?
Q. I've been seeing a guy for about a month now and we started to talk about the future and what the relationship is and he tells me that last summer he was accused of raping his ex. At the time he was telling me with I had just had consensual sex w...
A. 28 April 2018: In all honesty, when exactly does an accused rapist bring up a story like this to his new girlfriend?
This guy had the to choice to either tell you or not to tell you. I think the average man would NOT bring it up. Deny it if they could. But he t... (read in full...)
Long time friend wants to be more than friends.
Q. Hello agony aunts. Im facing some troubles and dealing with my guy friend's behavior towards me. My guy friend is being cold, sarcastic and mean to me in the past few weeks. Okay well let me start with this, he actually loves me, he told me before ...
A. 27 April 2018: For the sake of clarity for both the OP and "anonymous female" bear in mind this is from the mindset of another man. It's like this male friend is walking around with a huge booger hanging from his nose.His female friend assures him that their's... (read in full...)
Long time friend wants to be more than friends.
Q. Hello agony aunts. Im facing some troubles and dealing with my guy friend's behavior towards me. My guy friend is being cold, sarcastic and mean to me in the past few weeks. Okay well let me start with this, he actually loves me, he told me before ...
A. 27 April 2018: He's acting this way because the two of you have been friends for years. He knows everything about you, you know everything about him, you both get along fine and enjoy each other's company, however, the minute he suggests the two of you become more ... (read in full...)
We've split up,he wants me to move out.
Q. Hi Dear Cupid. I have been in a relationship for three and a half years and my partner split up with me once more and said we are done and that we can still be friends....does friends work? We still live together, are sleeping separately and ...
A. 27 April 2018: You can't heal in the same place you got hurt. You said it's killing you, you must be in a world-wind of emotions right now.
I'm getting the impression you haven't vented your frustration with him. Her sounds like a bit of an a-hole. I feel lik... (read in full...)
He canceled our second date and hasn’t rescheduled! Should I ask him why or just forget him?
Q. Two weeks ago I met a guy and we had a great date, he asked for a second date while we were still out so we made plans to meet up the following week. The day of our second date he cancelled because he had a cold so I didn't think anything of that, I ...
A. 24 April 2018: Patience grasshopper. It's only been a week. Chances are he's still sick. He'll probably need at least two weeks to fully recover. Feeling better doesn't mean he's no longer sick. How would you feel sitting across a table at a restaurant while she's ... (read in full...)
Their Grandma wont drop the subject, what do I do?
Q. A few years ago, my sister-in-law's grandmother and her boyfriend went to Alaska on a vacation (the boyfriend is now decease). We talked about Alaska and I mentioned to her that Alaska is my dream vacation. I did my research and realize how much...
A. 24 April 2018: I'm pretty sure besides the link she shares between you and your brother, she has very little to talk to you about. Your love for Alaska seems to be the only thing of interest you two seem to share. She's an old woman, with probably very few people ... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my heart race when I kiss my boyfriend?
Q. So I'm in a bit of a dilemma. I have dated 3 guys (and have kissed all of the ) and the guy I am with at the moment is my first love, we have kissed many times but my heart doesn't race like his does. The first guy I dated took my first kiss, and I ...
A. 22 April 2018: Different people respond in different ways to different events. Don't start building a fantasy or comparing how you may respond to kissing someone else to feel confident in it. Don't allow Hollywood to hoodwink you into how infatuation or love ... (read in full...)
How can I fix the relationship I have with my mother?
Q. It's rare me and my mother ever have an emotional, bonding conversation; I try and start a conversation with her but she just says "Yeah" or "Mhmm" or something to cut the conversation short. The only time we actually have a conversation is when ...
A. 4 April 2018: There's a VERY GOOD CHANCE your mom has narcissistic personality disorder. I know because EVERY SINGLE THING you wrote in your letter here today were the SAME THINGS I experienced growing up with my mother....and some... I am so happy and gratef... (read in full...)
My husband is disappointed because I didn't tell him about a job interview
Q. Hi guys I feel really terrible about lying to my husband about a recent job interview I had. Two weeks ago I applied for a job (he knew I had been looking) and got called for the interview and thankfully got it. However I didn't tell my husband ...
A. 4 April 2018: I don't get why he would say he can't trust you again, that sounds a bit over-the-top for something as simple as a job interview. If anything he sounds a bit whiny. I just hope he isn't the manipulative type who's intentionally trying to make y... (read in full...)
My boyfriend ridiculed me saying that I have small boobs and a big tummy!
Q. Dear cubid, The other day my bf of 2 years and i were video chating and i was wearing a tank top without a bra so he made a comment saying " ur boobs need serious help why doesn't the fat from ur stomach go up to ur boobs , just rotate the fat" ...
A. 3 April 2018: So he made a joke about your tiny breasts and bloated stomach, big deal? You should've just told him his penis was small and that you're leaving him for his brother then have a good laugh and get over it.
I'll admit, the joke did sound a tad bit ... (read in full...)
His neediness bothers me. Should I feel guilty for blocking him?
Q. Okay so I've only known this guy for 2 months only, he is at my university. He seemed nice at first and we hang out together, but then he started to creep me out with his neediness and him being too clingy. I was nice with him and i gave him hints ...
A. 2 April 2018: I think you feel guilty because he didn't do anything to physically harm you. He seemed to be good-natured and friendly guy but he was just annoying and his lack of spatial skills turned you off, and now your subconscience is trying to justify if ... (read in full...)
How do I handle dates where I don't want more?
Q. Often when I go on dates with guys, it becomes apparent to me quite quickly if I'm interested or not. I'm always respectful and kind on dates. But I have a very flirtatious smile, so often if I smile too much, I notice guys are responsive and want ...
A. 1 April 2018: Apologies OP. I could have sworn I saw female as the gender here. If you're a gay man I think that makes everything much more easier. Men will expect directness even more from you. I think most of what I said in my previous post is still relevant. ... (read in full...)
How do I react. He ignored me but is now dating my best friend
Q. If I met a guy in a club, asked him out, he gave me his number, I texted twice, he never responded. Months later I discover he is now having sex with my best friend. How should I react?...
A. 1 April 2018: There's not much you can do. He turned out to be a jerk. He did you a favour, because now you're available for the right guy to come along.
I'm hoping your friend has no idea that you were into this guy. Because if he did know then it would be... (read in full...)
What do you do when a relationship has become boring?
Q. Hi what do you do when a relationship has become boring I’ve been with my fiancé for 4 years we never do anything together in that time we’ve been out for 6 meals and that’s it he never wants to do anything he gets stoned every day all day he was a ...
A. 1 April 2018: A relationship takes two. You're writing that you're bored but blaming your boredom on your fiance. What have you been doing or suggesting in order to bring more fun into the relationship? Have you arranged any dinner dates or picnics? Any movie or ... (read in full...)
How do I handle dates where I don't want more?
Q. Often when I go on dates with guys, it becomes apparent to me quite quickly if I'm interested or not. I'm always respectful and kind on dates. But I have a very flirtatious smile, so often if I smile too much, I notice guys are responsive and want ...
A. 1 April 2018: I partially agree with @Youcantbeserious. Instead of a long, drawn out dinner date, try to arrange get-togethers that are expected to be short, like a lunch or breakfast date, a quick cup of coffee or a morning run which can help to determine if you ... (read in full...)
Should I accept a screen role with nudity?
Q. Hi uncle and aunties. I need some advice. I am an aspiring actress who is still in the middle of completing my bachelors degree at uni. I have done occasional work in TV commercials when I was a child growing up in my home country. I have also acted ...
A. 29 March 2018: This is a tricky situation.... Personally, I feel like unknown actors who get naked in front of the camera early never seem to make it far. A-list actors usually start doing nudity roles LATER in their career when they've already made a name for ... (read in full...)
Is it my destiny to be forgotten?
Q. Is it normal to be "invisible" to everyone? I know there are billions of us on this planet and we are all invisible unless we are famous, but that's not what I mean..! Am talking about to those who know us in life.. friends colleagues...
A. 28 March 2018: You're doing things in hopes of getting something back in return; a compliment, praise, congratulations, a wink and when these fantasies you've crafted don't come to pass your emotions takes centre stage and freak out. ""How dare life not give me ... (read in full...)
Has any of you ever had a pause in life?
Q. Has any of you ever had a pause in life? Like a decade long pause? What does one do? It's not something I planned, it just sort of happened. I moved with my husband to a foreign country when I was about 30 (had to) and in a blink of an eye I t...
A. 27 March 2018: You talk about yourself as if you're a 90 year old on her death bed. Why are women always so eager to label themselves as old the minute the touch 25? Have you seen the 50 and 60 year olds of today? They look like the new 30s and 40s. We all go ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend wants me to take a lie detector test because his brother says him and I had sex
Q. I have been dating my boyfriend for 8 months now whom I love dearly. I’m 28 and he’s a year older. We live together. So my boyfriend wants me to take a lie detector test because his pathological liar of a younger brother said that we slept togethe...
A. 26 March 2018: Doesn't sound like much of a trusting relationship, plus his jealous brother sounds like a trouble maker who could make your life hell. The relationship is young however and he's known his brother longer than you so it's understandable t... (read in full...)
I feel betrayed, every guy I like my best friend gets!
Q. Why do I feel so pointless? How come no guy ever likes me? So these questions started to arise after this guy who I liked who I told many time asked me if I had a boyfriend and I said no and asked why do you care and he said I’m jw I don’t like u ...
A. 22 March 2018: This guy sounds like a complete ass....maybe too much of an ass. I say this because you mentioned that he's been there for you, plus I believe you said that you told him you liked him multiple times. Naturally, I would assume he was a confidant in ... (read in full...)
My husband had an affair and now I can't sleep with him
Q. MOD NOTE: two questions combined into one Hi everyone. I've been married for nearly 6 years. We have a three year old son. Last year my husband and I had some issues where I focussed too much on one my hobbies and spent less time with him. He t...
A. 22 March 2018: You didn't reveal how you found out about your husband's affair, so I'm not certain if he told you, if your friend told you, or if you accidentally found out. That information would have had an impact on my response by I'll just play it by ear. In ... (read in full...)
My ex has said sorry after many years, but I want her to apologise for more!
Q. My ex apologised in a MSG many years after we broke up but all she said was sorry things were said. A lot more than things were said and I'm not an emotional person. She went out of her way to get to me on numerous occasions because I wasn't b...
A. 20 March 2018: You are so incredibly lucky, a figure from the past had the decency to apologize to you for their mistakes. Do you have any idea how many people would kill....KILL....for a gift like that? But instead you want more because that's not to your ... (read in full...)
The only time my girlfriend has orgasmed was with an ex boyfriend.
Q. We're together for a few months, our sex is great but she can't orgasm with me. I asked her why and she said she can't orgasm and that she had just one orgasm in life once with other guy in the past. I'm very jealous and insecure about that and d...
A. 20 March 2018: Instead of being down on yourself why not see this as an opportunity to become better at your sex game. Our struggles are usually what help us to grow and whenever we grow we become happier people.
She said she orgasmed once. You can make her orga... (read in full...)
I need advice on stepping back gently from a friend!
Q. So i have a friend who ive known since i was 9 we are now 40. We do not live near each other about a 2 hour drive away. Its not that i do not want her in my life as she is a nice person and we are there for each other. She has lots of issues (...
A. 20 March 2018: I think one of the best ways to solve your issue is to turn the tables on yourself. If you were down in the dumps, depressed, in need of a shoulder to cry on and just unable to see positivity in the world anymore would you want you friend to bail ... (read in full...)
I always recognise my boyfriend's birthdays but he never recognises mine.
Q. Hello, I'm currently in a one year long distance relationship. Though I saw him a month ago for two weeks. I bought him gifts and paid for most of our lunches or dinners together. He didn't get me a gift or paid for lunch or dinner. I know I ...
A. 14 March 2018: Well, in all honesty, it is only a ONE year relationship. I think the main concern here is that you do things for him in hopes that he will return the favour and as a result these fantasies of yours have now lead to you feeling let down. He does h... (read in full...)
Money mean son is refusing to bring his family to a family vacation.
Q. My youngest son has a good job with the US Postal Service. He has a wife and a daughter. His wife is a nurse. The problem is he is really tight with his money. I think he goes overboard with being tight with his money. He has always been tigh...
A. 14 March 2018: Mean or not, he's not obligated to spend money under your instructions, that's one of the main freedoms of living on his own not to mention being head of a family.
I understand you raised him and knew he was a miser since day one but not much can... (read in full...)
Family and friends want me to present as more "girly girl."
Q. I’m a girl, I’m not really girly but I don’t dress like a guy either. I just prefer to wear normal casual clothes like a crop top a bomber and nice jeans, vs heels and dresses. I don’t wear makeup, I don’t judge people that do but they seem to judge ...
A. 14 March 2018: I'm so very happy that you're comfortable in your own skin. It's a pretty uncommon trait among girls in their early 20s especially with social media apps like Instagram and Snap-chat virtually issuing unwritten rules and gimmicks as to how one ... (read in full...)
I like him but can't take the disresect anymore.
Q. Hi. I met a guy recently and we stared talking online . He said he is looking for something serious with me and is not here to waste time. At first I tried to invest my time in him by answering his calls in the morning and at night which ruined my ...
A. 10 March 2018: You met a guy RECENTLY and this is how he treats you?
Wow, you need to block this guy. He has some SERIOUS issues.
He's only thinking about himself. He's a selfish person. And it seems once you aren't there to listen to his chatter he explodes ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is unemotional and giving me the silent treatment!
Q. Dear Cupid I'm living with my bf of 3 years , and he is nice most of the times, but he is very unemotional and practical and had not told me he loves me yet, though I said couple of times and no response So I got pregnant , we both agreed it...
A. 8 March 2018: I'm no doctor, but this does not sound like a very healthy relationship.
Are you sure you don't pester or annoy him all day long? Men tend to tune women out if they become too overwhelming for them at any point in time and sometimes not saying a... (read in full...)
Do I have to be a bad boy to find love?
Q. I met some one new, my question is, so do I act like my self,which is a gentleman, kind of guy who opens doors, says nice things, I keep hearing from my friends that am too nice, act like I don't give a hoot, my friends say she will like me more, so ...
A. 8 March 2018: I think most men have reached this crossroads at some point in their lives. To be or not to be? It's unfortunate that the kind and caring people are the ones who get stomped on the most, however, it's with good reason.
You shouldn't aim to be on... (read in full...)
Is it possible for me to ejaculate and not realize it?
Q. I have sex with my gf, 3 times in fact in a night till morning, first was 6-7:30pm and 2nd was 2:00am, it's unprotected sex and I did a pull out, it was successful, but on the 3rd time I did it around 6:30, I did not cum, or I think so.. I was hard ...
A. 4 March 2018: You're testes can only store so much sperm. The more you ejaculate the less sperm will be available the next time. If you continue having sex you will notice that you will orgasm but you will not ejaculate much, maybe you won't release anything.
... (read in full...)
I used to love my friend but now she gives me anxiety
Q. A few years ago, I was very close with my friend. We had similar interests and always had a conversation topic. However, since last August, she seemed very cold and distant. She started hating anything I liked and sided with anyone else in a...
A. 4 March 2018: Science has proven that the meaner your friend the more they care about you. At first blush it might sound weird, but when you really give it some thought you may understand it better. A real friend will tell you like it is, and won't try to ... (read in full...)
Why are other people so negative?
Q. Why are people always negative or trying to make me feel small. What is it that I do? From a young age, I have always had to deal with negativity. As a result I have become auto-pilot positive in response (could call it defensive). I often realised...
A. 3 March 2018: I don't know much about you as an individual but I can see how these "friends" of yours make you feel. Your new found success has left you feeling like crap because....of other people in your life. As humans we tend to grown into newer versions o... (read in full...)
My wife won't allow me to choose our son's name, constantly undermines me and hates me
Q. My wife is 33 weeks pregnant with our first son. Today she started to fight with me. I had chosen a name for our child. She didn't even pay attention. I picked her up from the church today and she announced that she wants our son to be named by...
A. 25 February 2018: It could just be the pregnancy hormones talking but her behaviour does comes off pretty extreme plus you haven't provided much details as to how your wife generally treats you. But, from what I gather about the movies and the 10-year-contempt she ... (read in full...)
How can I change my attitude?
Q. Hello Aunts I want to ask on how I can change my outlook and co dependency in life. I am very insecure - although on the outside I am put together - degreed - attractive- thin- middle class pay - my insecurities eat me up. I haven’t analyzed...
A. 24 February 2018: The good news is you've highlighted the problem and now you want to change it. That's an excellent start. One of the reasons I answered this question is because I feel like I can relate to you very deeply with this issue. The difference here however ... (read in full...)
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