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... Send *issKin a private message | | | *issKin's profile:Hi all. Have been using this site for a long time.
I'm in my mid 20's, in a long term relationship and have been with my significant other for over three years.
Hope to be able to provide fair and honest advice to people without judging. |
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| Latest articles: How to be secure in love...
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 October 2008: How to be secure in love... When you enter a relationship, it opens up hundreds, thousands of uncertain feelings. Little potholes in our sanity and they can easily make their ways into becoming tunnels. I was the most confident person in the wo...
Sex is a funny thing...
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
13 January 2008: I have recently started going out with a guy that I am CRAZY about. I really love him and our relationship has moved really quickly. We were close friends first and both rather secretive about feeling anything more for the other, afraid to ruin what ...
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He don't give me money,but I feel he should do that sometimes or buy me things
Q. dear cupid, i've been in a relationship for four months now with a young charming guy,he is 27 n very matured. i get scared sometimes cos of things i have experienced in my past relationships.he is very nice n caring also matured as well,but i fi...
A. 13 April 2008: okay.. so you think he should buy you things?
I've been with my boyfriend four months too. and i hardly even let him buy me lunch.
I think you're being a bit selfish. four months isn't very long. It's his money. you have your own money.
Have y... (read in full...)
Does it feel better for a girl to masturbate on her stomach?
Q. My question is: Why does it feel better for a girl to masturbate on her stomach? My girlfriend was telling me about it once and she said that it felt waaay better to do it on her stomach rather than on her back or in the shower. Why is this?...
A. 13 April 2008: This is just her personal preference and what she enjoys best. I disagree with this. Some women will feel the same. Masturbation is about what feels best to the person doing it, so it doesn't matter why she enjoys this. There's nothing wrong with it ... (read in full...)
Is it ok to kiss a friend on the lips?
Q. Is it ok to kiss a friend on the lips? x...
A. 12 April 2008: Because you're so young, i think it is. As long as both partners are consenting it's fine.. but it's breaking the boundary of 'friendship' and begining to make it somethng else. Especially not acceptable when in a relationship. ... (read in full...)
Is this bloating in my stomach---normal?
Q. dear cupid i would like to know if it normal for this to occur. i feel and see that my stomach is bloated and whenever i tell my parents they say its normal. i used to be fat but lost weight quickly and look slim a bit. my question is, is ...
A. 11 April 2008: U cud be gaining weight. it could be due to the weight you lost 'quickly' and it depends how you lost this weight - healthily, or unhealthily? Did you exercise and diet? Or starve and do nothing?
It could just be that your stomach has shrunk and ... (read in full...)
Should a couple share ALL their secrets? What do you think?
Q. Do you think a couple should share everything in their mind? All their secrets? ...
A. 11 April 2008: i agree with the anonymous person. It's perfectly okay to keep some secrets. especially to do with the past. I have lots of secrets from my partner because i know if he knew them, (they're about my past and when i was a lot younger) it would put a ... (read in full...)
Should I cut off my cheating ex boyfriend from my kids? He broke my heart in pieces!
Q. I met this guy in 2004. He already had a girlfriend but said that he really did not want to be with her. I never expected anything to come from this relationship and when I was ready to stop communicating with him he kept calling and harrasing. ...
A. 11 April 2008: I think in this respect you need to address things from an outward perspective. If you can look away from what he's done to you. how will it affect your children to not have their father? will it be better for them? or worse? Is it fair to take him ... (read in full...)
I'm a tomboy who hates being emotional! Does anyone relate to this?
Q. im soo angry right now!!!!!!!!!!! like...its soo silly, but i dont know why i feel like this... when i was little, i was a proper little tomboy...my long curly hair combined with torn up jeans, jeans which were torn up by playing 'knock door r...
A. 11 April 2008: Hm. in one respect i understand. Because i hate being all emotional and honest and i don't want anything to be serious. i want everything to be light and fun. i dont mind other people being emotional. i never have, but as soon as i start feeling ... (read in full...)
Tricky situation with the morning after pill? Can you use it twice in one cycle?
Q. the condom came off while intercourse with my partner, he realised soon after and didnt cum inside of me,i would take a morning after pill but i took one 2 weeks ago and don't know if you can take 2 on one cycle. Also its a bit tricky because im ...
A. 11 April 2008: that was a 'yes' as in 'yes i have advice for you'. i think u can use the pill twice in one cycle but to be sure follow my previous advice. ... (read in full...)
Tricky situation with the morning after pill? Can you use it twice in one cycle?
Q. the condom came off while intercourse with my partner, he realised soon after and didnt cum inside of me,i would take a morning after pill but i took one 2 weeks ago and don't know if you can take 2 on one cycle. Also its a bit tricky because im ...
A. 11 April 2008: Yes. Ring your doctor. Ring the NHS helpline.
NHS Direct on 0845 4647 - this is the number i use when i have problems relating t the pill.
British prenancy advisory service
08457 304 030
and this is another number you could use for some help an... (read in full...)
I don't want him to be offended but I don't like to "swallow". Can I spit it out in the toilet?
Q. Okay here's my problem. I love giving my boyfriend head because i know he enjoys it so much. But, I can't stand the taste of come. With my ex boyfriend, he told me when he was going to come and I just switched and used my hand. But my boyfrie...
A. 11 April 2008: Being experienced = swallowing? I think not :) don't worry. it's a personal choice. most decent guys understand this. Looking disgusted and spitting it out ruin the moments - a trip to the loo is a bit out of the question.
You should just ask him ... (read in full...)
I hit my pregnant girlfriend and now she is ignoring me! I feel awful...
Q. I hit my girlfriend and she is 5 months pregnant i feel bad and everthing but she is ignoring me and i dont get. I said sorry she was winding me up and i hit her i really need to see what can i do please help i feel awful. PLZ HELP?! she is alot ...
A. 11 April 2008: The reason they can't see that you 'wont do it again' is because every man or woman that abuses their partner does so, cries, apologies and then says 'i'll never do it again' at one point and they will. How do they know you won't? How do you really ... (read in full...)
Why when I try to get my girl friend to try oral sex she just sits there and gives me weird looks?
Q. here's my problem... when i try to get my girl friend to try oral sex she just sits there and gives me weird looks and so i ask her wat and shes like i dont know and so i ask her how does she not know and she doesnt really say anything so.. if ...
A. 11 April 2008: You're both still really young and inexperienced. This could be a sign she doesn't know what she's doing and doesn't WANT to do it but doesn't feel comfortable saying no to you - which is a really bad sign. Both partners should never feel bad for ... (read in full...)
His family don't like me because they preffered his ex!
Q. I've been going out with my boyfriend for over two years, and despite us having a perfect relationship...there is one thing that bothers me sooo much. His family! Before we met, my boyfriend was seeing a girl for almost four years. All ...
A. 11 April 2008: That's seriously harsh. I hate to say this but... i thought my family was bad to my brothers new girlfriend, but we're no where near this bad. How cruel of them.
To be honest, do you really want to meet people who treat a perfect stranger with such... (read in full...)
I have a really low self esteem problem that my boyfriend doesn't understand
Q. I have a really low self esteem problem that my boyfriend doesnt understand, im always trying to find new ways of how i can make myself 'look better'. Im a size 18, and i just feel fat all the time, i have an eating dissorder as a result, my boyfr...
A. 11 April 2008: I'm so freaked out because apart from the eating disorder bit, i could have written this question.
It sounds a lot like my situation. I think really you should deal with your ating disorder - get rid of it. Eat healthily and you'll feel phys... (read in full...)
I hit my pregnant girlfriend and now she is ignoring me! I feel awful...
Q. I hit my girlfriend and she is 5 months pregnant i feel bad and everthing but she is ignoring me and i dont get. I said sorry she was winding me up and i hit her i really need to see what can i do please help i feel awful. PLZ HELP?! she is alot ...
A. 11 April 2008: Hm. to be honest, you deserve it. I don't care if she hit you first - she's pregnant. She's pregnant, she's younger than you, it's your baby - you're not supposed to hit her. I don't care if she was winding you up either. Okay so obviously you know ... (read in full...)
Unprotected sex - strange period - unpleasant discharge, could it be an infection?
Q. Hey, Im 24 years old and somethings worrying me about my period. I usually come on on the 15th of every month and very regular. 2 days ago tho, i noticed a brownish red discharge in my knickers when i went to the toilet, the type of discharge you ...
A. 11 April 2008: My best advice is to get tested for an infection. Get tested for pregnancy. Don't have unprotected sex. It could be anything, it could be nothing. Even if you dont have any other symptoms, you could have contracted a disease or infection but some ... (read in full...)
Help with bullying
Q. i have been bullyed for a while wat shall i do?...
A. 11 April 2008: Bullying is a really serious issue. Not just physical bullying. Name calling and such like are classed as emotional bullying.
I know children think telling an adult will make it worse. But you really need to tell an adult. a parent. a teacher. an o... (read in full...)
It hurts when I rub her clit - why?
Q. okay well... my girl friend and i do things like me fingering her and oral sex and her giving me a hand job. but here's my problem when im fingering my girlfriend and then i try to rub her clit and she says that it hurts her and we dont know why.. ...
A. 11 April 2008: I have this problem too. My boyfriend is a bit 'rough' and it feels so sensitive and so intense when he touches my clit that it physically hurts and he has to stop.
Try rubbing around it, and using the hood over the clit and rubbing thru that. For ... (read in full...)
How can I get in touch with this guy I really like? I have no contact numbers for him.
Q. Well i met a boy 6 years ago and we were quite good friends, i've not been able to speak to him for 3 years, but still really fancy him. I have got no contact numbers or address or email for him, how can i contact him? I met him on holiday and it w...
A. 11 April 2008: I know you said beth won't see him till october but this is really your only real option isnt it?
And to be honest.. youhaven't seen him in how long? how can you still fancy him? people change a lot in a year, let alone more than that. There's no w... (read in full...)
Should same sex marriages be legal, in your opinion?
Q. Hey so my question is should Same Sex marriage be legal? I think yes, but I would like to know what you think....
A. 10 April 2008: Yes. I think they should but I don't think they should be religious ceremonies.
I think as long as there is love between two people it doesn't matter what their gender is.
However, if two people want to have say a Christian wedding but are the ... (read in full...)
How to change the taste of vaginal fluid?
Q. I'm currently with a girl who does not produce a lot of fluid when she gets aroused and the taste is kind of sour and it has a stronger smell. She LOVES getting any oral action. I really want to please her and I do enjoy eating a girl out but her ...
A. 10 April 2008: I'm glad to hear you're going to join in too and make it a bit more fun. There's definitely variations both naturally and because of diet.
My boyfriend is seriously salty all the time but he eats sugary foods all the time. So sugary foods does not ... (read in full...)
Where to have sex? - we aren't allowed to hang out when our parents aren't at home!
Q. Okay well im 15 and I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months. It's not a long time, i know. But its a long time for me, anywayss(: We've done a lot of "sexual" stuff, but not actual sex. He fingers me and touches my boobs and stuff and i give him ...
A. 10 April 2008: Oh! well sorry. I didn't grasp that :) In that case don't worry about it right now lol things will work themselves out. When you feel more ready for it you'll think of something perfect.
gud luck. ... (read in full...)
Where to have sex? - we aren't allowed to hang out when our parents aren't at home!
Q. Okay well im 15 and I've been with my boyfriend for 5 months. It's not a long time, i know. But its a long time for me, anywayss(: We've done a lot of "sexual" stuff, but not actual sex. He fingers me and touches my boobs and stuff and i give him ...
A. 10 April 2008: I don't have any real advice. it's okay being ready and everything but you shouldn't disrespect your parents because they obviously sense what you're up to and don't want you getting up to that. you need to respect that.
I think you should wait... (read in full...)
How to change the taste of vaginal fluid?
Q. I'm currently with a girl who does not produce a lot of fluid when she gets aroused and the taste is kind of sour and it has a stronger smell. She LOVES getting any oral action. I really want to please her and I do enjoy eating a girl out but her ...
A. 10 April 2008: spicey foods, any thing like curry - spicey/bbq flavoured food, onions or peppers, make the taste of vaginal fluids somewhat unpleasant and 'smelly'.
Eating fresh fruit, drinking fruit juice, eating healthy greens and cutting out any excess of salt... (read in full...)
Should I tell my teacher that I love him?
Q. i dont know if i love my teacher, its probably just a crush but i cant stop thinking about him. i think he knows by now i like him, because i sent him an email and said i think you're amazing and the best teacher i've ever had, and then yesterday he ...
A. 10 April 2008: no. you shouldnt. he clearly doesn't know how to react. and he can't and doesn't feel the same. ur just going to let urself get hurt. Try not to think about him. try to get over it. i know it's hard and i know it might seem impossible but eventually ... (read in full...)
How long does you wait to have sex in a relationship?
Q. Hi everyone! I was wondering if any of you could tell me how long one should wait to have sex in a relationship. For those who are wondering it's been around 6 months and we're both virgins! thanks in advance!...
A. 10 April 2008: You wait until your relationship is ready. There's no set 'standard bar' of time for this. It's a choice made between two couples. for some it happens really soon. for others, they wait a long time. and some people wait for marriage.
I think it's... (read in full...)
Am I too nice? Did I love her too much?
Q. Did I drive away the only girl I've ever loved? I thought I was close to being a perfect boyfriend. I was charming, funny, very generous, expressed feelings of love to her... Then recently I found out that some of these reasons could be exactly...
A. 10 April 2008: I think the most important thing is to be who you are. If someone doesn't love who you really are, they don't really love you at all?
I'm sure she didn't leave you because you 'loved' her too much. maybe she does prefer a guy who is meaner, but ... (read in full...)
Is there something funny going on with my internet guy?
Q. To start with i have met this guy online 7 months ago. Since then we always send each other, emails and I'ms. We talk like 3 to 4 times a week.We haven't met personally yet coz he lives in another state.He told me everything about him and I am to ...
A. 10 April 2008: To be honest.. internet relationships are usually dodgy. Sometimes they turn out okay but anyway can pretend to be sincere. Some people get into an 'internet relationship' and get to the point where things shud be 'taken further' but don't actually ... (read in full...)
12 years old - too young to have sex?
Q. i wanna have sex but i think 12 is tooo young!...
A. 10 April 2008: Yes. every single person on this site who is older than twelve will say yes. You are too young to have sex. 12 is too young. I personally thinkg 15 is too young. 16 is a maybe. You're too young. Wait till you're older.
You think twelve is too youn... (read in full...)
Pregnant! I'm only 11 and I'm a good girl really. I don't know what to do.
Q. hi im 11 years old i dont drink or drink achohal im a good girll but somhow im pregnant and dont no wat do???p.s my parents do not no...
A. 10 April 2008: 'but somehow you're pregnant'? Um. i'm not sure how this sounds to other people, but this makes it sound like you don't know HOW you ended up pregnant. I'd appreciate it if u clarrified the fact that you had sex. if you didn't have sex and have no ... (read in full...)
What do I do when my parents give me the "sex" talk?
Q. I am 14 and my parents still havent gave me sex talk. But when that time comes how do i tell them i know all about sex? Cause i did research on it and my sister told me? Help!...
A. 9 April 2008: I think it would do you good to have the talk with your parents. It makes the subject more open, means you have someone to talk to if anything goes wrong/happens and you can double check that everything you've 'researched' is correct and you've got ... (read in full...)
Will the fact that I'm circumsized stop me from having sexual pleasure? I'm a virgin.
Q. hi my names mike and me and my girlfriend have decided to have sex together but she dosent know that im circumsized - does matter if i am or not and will i not stop me from having as much pleasure as men which aren't circumsized?...
A. 9 April 2008: I don't think it affects the amount of pleasure you get either way. As far as i'm aware it still feels great! (but i obviously wouldn't personally know.) but i've never heard any circumcised guys complain about not getting pleasure.
I think your... (read in full...)
What is rainbow kissing? Should I try it?
Q. I might sound really stupid asking this but what does rainbow kissing mean? My current boyfriend is pretty kinky and like trying everything out. I was a virgin when we got together so he's taught me everything i know. He asked me at the weekend ...
A. 9 April 2008: Wow! kinky or what? i didn't know what it was either. This is slightly insane. Lol. i'd make sure you were okay with this before you tried it, screw knowing wat it is - are you okay with him doing it?
To be honest, i've learnt from experience it's... (read in full...)
I've been feeling tetchy and moody after going to depo, and my bf is now ignoring me!
Q. Recently I changed my contraception from the pill to the depo injection, I started to get weepy and easily moody in the few weeks that followed my first one last month, at first i thought it was just stress but speaking to my doctor today it seems ...
A. 9 April 2008: if he's ignoring you then there isn't much you can do. How serious are the two of you? how long have you been together? Should you consider this a break up and move on? Is he worth it if he won't allow you to make a mistake?
Just some thoughts for ... (read in full...)
I have a problem with him ending sex with masturbation! Does this stem from watching too much porn?
Q. Lately, whenever we have sex, he cums a little and then says he is close to a "big one" and to play with him (i.e. jack him off, lick him, etc) until he's close and then he'll either cum inside of me or just cum. He seems to be in the mind set that ...
A. 9 April 2008: I'm not sure i really see a problem. Do you not like this method of ending sex? If you're pleasured/satisfied, does it really matter so much what method he enjoys most to 'finish up'?
I can see why you would relate this to porn but perhaps he just... (read in full...)
How can I compete with his video games? I'm fed up!!
Q. hi first off , i'm 13 and my boyfriend is 17. when i was 12 we started going out we loved each other very much. we had an argument and broke up we were together for 5 and a half months. we then got back together 2 months ago things have been...
A. 9 April 2008: I think you should just tell him that you feel like sometimes he loves his games more than you. Just mention it. You can talk about virginity and losing it and stuff with each other, this shouldn't even be a challenege. Simply explain to him that ... (read in full...)
I have chest aches when I breathe too deeply and purple lines on my thigh! What is this?!
Q. Hi, I know this will be a strange question, well its two in one, but id be thankful for help. Sometimes when i breathe in deeply, i get a dull ache at the top of my chest, just above my nipple. Anybody had this, or know what be causing it? Als...
A. 9 April 2008: I get the breathing thing sometimes. I just stopped breathing so deeply to be honest. If you're worried or can't HELP breathing properly cud be a respiratory illness - see your GP.
The short purply red lines? Sounds like varicus (can't spell it) ... (read in full...)
I went to "third base" with a gentleman from my trip - now I feel lost in my values, as this situation contradicts my usual self!
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles, I am twenty years old and until recently I have never been kissed. Kissing was something I was not familiar with and I could not push myself to do something I did not consider natural, no matter how perfect, accordin...
A. 9 April 2008: This was just a step in a random experimental direction. It may seem like you've broken your original values - you were obviously pressured into this by the reactions you received from friends and family. There is nothing wrong with the things you ... (read in full...)
We had a threesome, now I'm jealous as I was awoken by them having sex in the morning!? I don't want to lose my BF to my best friend!
Q. I've been seeing my boyfriend for a few months now. We are both very adventurous and have both had threesomes before. So when my boyfriend suggested one I was happy to oblige. We had a house party last month and at the end there was me, my bf an...
A. 9 April 2008: I agree with Ayda1110 on this one. It's wrong to have a threesome and then have one on one. especially with you right there! If you were 'merry' as in drunk then perhaps this hadn't worn off yet but that's besides the point. I think you should tell ... (read in full...)
Chance of pregnancy if I didn't take the pills the exact time I was supposed to?
Q. i'm on birth control pills and take it everyday but not at the exact same time for couple of days, i had a very short sex with my bf with no condom,although he didn't have an orgasm but i'm just thinking if there's any risk of pregnancy cos i didn't ...
A. 7 April 2008: It depends what pill you're on. But either way you should be fine. if you're on the combined pill you have a three hour gap to take your pill in but you should try to take it on the dot everyday for most effectiveness. If you're on the mini-pill ... (read in full...)
I really don't know if I lost my virginity or not, please advise me.
Q. I was hooking up with this guy a while back. We had agreed not to have sex because I'm still a virgin and want to stay that way, and he's never been with a virgin and doesn't want to be. He was rubbing his penis along the inside of my labia and he ...
A. 7 April 2008: It sounds like he may have broken your hymen. He may have even almost penetrated you or penetrated you just barely but i doubt he actually did otherwise you both realy would have known about it. I'd say it was an 'almost'. this doesn't mean you've ... (read in full...)
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