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*issKin agony aunt

*issKin

United Kingdom  (Female   XML/RSS

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*issKin's profile:

Hi all. Have been using this site for a long time.

I'm in my mid 20's, in a long term relationship and have been with my significant other for over three years.

Hope to be able to provide fair and honest advice to people without judging.

Latest articles:

How to be secure in love...

This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

11 October 2008: How to be secure in love... When you enter a relationship, it opens up hundreds, thousands of uncertain feelings. Little potholes in our sanity and they can easily make their ways into becoming tunnels. I was the most confident person in the wo...

Sex is a funny thing...

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

13 January 2008: I have recently started going out with a guy that I am CRAZY about. I really love him and our relationship has moved really quickly. We were close friends first and both rather secretive about feeling anything more for the other, afraid to ruin what ...

< Prev1234567891011Next > [10 pages, 360 answers]

My husband is a neat freak and I don't have any motivation to clean!

Q.   help!i want to stop this emotional maddnes! my husband is a neat freak and i really just dont care. i really cant find motivation to clean the house. i want to, but when its messed up by him hours later i jsut say screw and dont do it anymore. idk ...

A.   1 November 2009: Then he isn't a neat freak he IS a control freak. I wouldn't do it. Not to be disrespectful but there is no way i would clean because i'm OBLIGATED to as a wife and a mother. no freaking way. don't let it become a pig-sty but if he wants it spic and ... (read in full...)

I slept with my girlfriend and now she's not calling me back! And also.. my male friend hit on me!

Q.   Hello fellow agony aunts. I have a problem..actually it's 2 and i was wondering if you guys could help. So last night was Halloween and there was a huge party in my town. Everyone..all my friends and people from other schools were there. And i we...

A.   1 November 2009: I think you need to give your girlfriend awhile, and maybe try to contact her again in a little bit and if not try again tomorrow. Try not to pressure her into calling! But it's nice that you're worried about her. As for your man friend, i thin... (read in full...)

My husband is a neat freak and I don't have any motivation to clean!

Q.   help!i want to stop this emotional maddnes! my husband is a neat freak and i really just dont care. i really cant find motivation to clean the house. i want to, but when its messed up by him hours later i jsut say screw and dont do it anymore. idk ...

A.   1 November 2009: If he's a neat freak - why is he messing up the house? being a true neat freak means you DON'T make a mess. so i can't imagine it bothers him that much if he's the one making the mess. It shouldn't be just your job to clean either, you should both ... (read in full...)

Mistreated sexually in a shop! What should I have done?

Q.   I went to a shop the other week somewhere in Northwest England (not saying where), was looking at buying some new electronics for my husband, and asked a saleswoman for advice. She then asked me to come over to her desk, to discuss it, which I did, ...

A.   1 November 2009: I agree. I actually think you should contact the police. And have them contact the store for you. Have the date, rough time, and description/name of the employee who did this. you don't want this to happen to anybody else. ... (read in full...)

I haven't known him long enough to sleep with him, what do I do?

Q.   Hi ima 17 year old girl ima virgin and I get horny really easy when ima around a guy and a girl and yes im bi I go for girl's mor but I currently have a boyfriend he's willing 2 wait form me but some time's I feel like im going 2 do some thing ...

A.   1 November 2009: I'm not sure i understand what is holding you back. If you feel ready to do it and you're worried you WILL do it because you can't 'control yourself' to not go 'that far' with him... why are you abstaining from doing it? Sometimes it's not about ho... (read in full...)

My mum made me have an abortion but now I can't stop thinking about the baby I gave up.

Q.   Im 14 years old, 15 in march. This February i had an abortion, my mom made me have an a abortion as i was too young to keep the baby, but i was too scared to tell my mom that i wanted to keep the baby. All i do now is think about what if i kept i...

A.   1 November 2009: You really were too young to have a baby, let alone too young to be having sex! Especially unprotected sex. Think of it this way, if you weren't responsible enough to not get pregnant, then you aren't grown up enough to look after a baby. It's ... (read in full...)

Late for my period, what are the chances that I may be pregnant?

Q.   i am 9 days late on my period, having slight cramps but no sign of blood, having white discharge , started having sore nipples and sometimes feeling sick could i be pregnant? whats the chances?...

A.   1 November 2009: You haven't said when you had sex, if you had unprotected sex, or how long ago you last had sex. But either way, regardless - see a doctor. Do a pregnancy test.... (read in full...)

Does she look at other men? Is she lying to me?

Q.   I feel terrible. I do not know what to do. I have accused my girlfriend time after time after time of looking at other men and she always insists that she doesn't. But I see her looking around whenever we are outside, so she has to be judging and ...

A.   1 November 2009: I think the fact that you explained her feelings by saying 'blah blah blah' means you're not really listening to her. The differences between your cultures might be causing a problem but even if she is gazing at other men, people look at everything ... (read in full...)

Things used to be so sweet. How can they go back to the way they used to be?

Q.   I miss my girlfriend so much were still together we've been datin for 9 months but this past month just hasn't been the same. We would always do things that we like doin and at the end of the day we would just cuddle and watch tv or a movie. And ...

A.   1 November 2009: You need to just talk to her about this. Tell her how you feel. Ask her how she feels. come to a conclusion about what you have to do together. You can't force feelings into something - even if they used to be there but aren't anymore. i hope it ... (read in full...)

She cheated on me and I forgive her, but now she does not know what she wants.

Q.   Well here it goes, I was went on vacation and I kept in contact with my girlfriend that I love very much, and i suspected something was going on and I was right She was cheating on me and she admitted it and asked me to forgive her I was raged but I ...

A.   1 November 2009: So you've cheated on each other. Obviously this isn't the greatest structure for a relationship but it shows strength that you've been able to forgive each other. You have to ask though, what made her cheat? If she really likes the guy, rather than ... (read in full...)

I want to be with him, he broke up with his girlfriend for me but now he isn't replying to me.

Q.   ive been in love for months with a boy. he works with me, and has told me hundreds of times he loves me too and he really wants to be with me. but he has a "girlfriend" a girl who he texts constantly but never sees face to face. we have hooked up a ...

A.   1 November 2009: You need to relax. If you really do want him, think about what you're asking him to do - to break up with somebody he's in a relationship with! The other girl has feelings too you know. I realise you love him, and that's fair enough, but give him ... (read in full...)

Is weight the absolue dealbreaker for guys?

Q.   I am 30 now, but when I was 14 in high school I secretly had a crush on a guy. After graduation, we hooked up (made out) a couple of times, but then he disappeared, got married and had a kid. During his marriage, he started emailing me - 27 emails ...

A.   1 November 2009: I weigh more than you do, and though i AM trying to lose weight, i'm doing it more for my health than for a guy. Because i have a boyfriend. A lovely sweet amazing guy who i'd do anything for and who would love me if i put on tons more weight or ... (read in full...)

Our mom s too clingy and our nan has just passed away, what should I do?

Q.   hi hope you ca help me its about my mom my moms mom our nan died nearlly two months ago and it was hard for everyone she was like our second mom too were a close family since then though its been really hard with my mom ,ive moved out living with ...

A.   27 September 2009: She's an adult but she's human too. Don't just push her away. She obviously needs you, so give her some of your time. Go shopping together. Have lunch together. But talk to her like an adult, be reasonable. Let her know you love her and want to be ... (read in full...)

Can I trust her now?

Q.   I've been dating my girlfriend for a year now, and things are really great. My problem is that I found out that she used to be very permiscuous. She was also a substance abuser. I dont believe she has ever cheated on me, but my imagination gets the ...

A.   27 September 2009: If you love her - trust her. And if she loves you, if you really know she loves you - you should have nothing to worry about. And thinking up things that you CAN worry about, will only lead to disaster. Don't think about the what-if's, just think ... (read in full...)

Are my resentful thoughts called for and how long should I allow myself to recover?

Q.   My partner left me after 18 years together. Three weeks later I found out that she was with someone else. She wasnt upset in anyway and ended it with a twn minute coversation in a supermarket coffee shop with her friend sat next to her. It really ...

A.   27 September 2009: Your thoughts are called for. You have the right to think and feel however you want, as long as you don't take any actions that you will regret. She has left you with little to no explanation and nothing you can see that would have called for it ... (read in full...)

Why is he ignoring me?

Q.   I like this guy a lot. We had sex about a week ago which was my first time and now he's ignoring me. When I call he doesn't answer when I text he doesn't text back. If he does he says he's working. I really don't know since he use to do it before he ...

A.   27 September 2009: I don't mean to be blatant but screw him. He's obviously not very interested in you or he would recall. Don't regret your first time though, if it was nice at the time it was better than most. Leave him and let him come running back to you if he ... (read in full...)

Do you think theres a huge diffrence in age?

Q.   I Have a Problem . I really like this guy , But he is a year younger than me and also the younger brother of one of my very old friends i havnt seen in awhile . I know he wants to mke us offical but im not sure , even though it seems almost TO ...

A.   10 September 2009: It's hardly anything. People over come bigger age differences all the time. :) u'll be fine. ... (read in full...)

Running out of patience!

Q.   im running out of patience with my boyfriend of 2 years. we are on holidays so i have been at his house for a week straight. While i was there i felt like all he wanted to do was play computer games and was bored with me so i said this to him that i ...

A.   9 July 2009: Hm well, if he won't come to yours for whatever reason then you really do hve to talk to him and make him see that you need to be at home as well. There's giving him space, but then there's leaving him as well. sometimes we just need a break for an ... (read in full...)

Running out of patience!

Q.   im running out of patience with my boyfriend of 2 years. we are on holidays so i have been at his house for a week straight. While i was there i felt like all he wanted to do was play computer games and was bored with me so i said this to him that i ...

A.   9 July 2009: You've been together 2 years, have you ever spent so much time together before? People can't smother each other for weeks on end 24 hours a day. You have different hobbies and you both want each others attention while being able to do what you wish ... (read in full...)

Sensitive penis...

Q.   Ok, so I badly want to have sex! I'm 21, only had sex once before and my current situation means that I HAVE to wear a condom, no question! My problem is, I have such a sensitive penis. Whether im erect or not, the thought of someone/somethin...

A.   18 May 2009: I personally wouldn't know what's 'wrong' with you, if there is really something wrong. people r made in different ways, maybe this is just naturally the way you are. However, i recommend seeing your GP or having a talk on the phone with a free ... (read in full...)

I'm not sure how long I can continue being punished by him!

Q.   I need some advice please. My bf wanted to know everything from my past, every last detail of who I was with, what I did with them, when, where etc etc. When he asked who I had slept with I lied. Reduced the number mainly as I was ashamed and regr...

A.   11 May 2009: U don't need to be 'punished'. you need to be forgiven. You didn't cheat on him, you simply spared his feelings and were worried about losing him. This was your mistake and you know that - but sometimes we do stupid things out of fear of losing what ... (read in full...)

Am I being paranoid or have I got every right to be angry?

Q.   okay here goes.... I was reading through my bf's phone earlier and found texts from 2 girls (they both work at the club he plays rugby for). He had deleted his sent items so I don't actually know what he said to them, but the texts from these g...

A.   10 April 2009: If you look for trouble. u shall find it. give him a break. ur being overly suspicious. Chill out for awhile. the more you suspect - the more you're going to read into every little thing he does until it breaks you apart. texts aren't really chea... (read in full...)

I'm no angel myself but I want to work things out and she just wants out!

Q.   Hi I have been with my baby's mom for 6 years. Recently we have been having alot of problems. I have found wierd numbers on the cell phone bills, she has been coming home. I know Im no angel my self. I get really angry. Recently I found out my mom ...

A.   10 April 2009: you can't make her stay. let her move on. focus on your family. try to make it a civil break up - the worst break ups are the ones that cause a lot of negative feeling and drama, this is what will harm your daughter further - depending on your ... (read in full...)

My parents don't trust me with my girlfriend!

Q.   my parents dont trust me... me and my girlfriend have been goin gout for a year she's 15 and im 14.,, and yes we're a very mature couple for our age//...but we wont do anything we are not ready for....whenever were alone watching tv in t...

A.   10 April 2009: She's not being stupid. she's being careful. you have to understand it from your mothers perspective. she's worried about the both of you and is trying to protect you frm the fate that SO many young children have gotten themselves into. early ... (read in full...)

Would we be ok to have sex with protection and me on the pill?

Q.   Me and my boyfriend are both 15 years old and virgins, we have been best mates when little and actually got together 3 years ago next month. We've talked about sex, we have condoms, and we have only kissed and hugged alot, i have given him a hand...

A.   10 April 2009: I hate all the 'you're too young' comments. u know how old u are, age is a number - real age is shown in ur actions. ur being responsible! and therefore you won't regret it (hopefully not) later on in life if you're sure about your decision. :) t... (read in full...)

Do you think my boyfriend's mad at me?

Q.   I was at work and started talking to a customer on the phone. He was very nice and we had a great conversation and laugh with something totally not related to work. I told my boyfriend about it after the fact as he was asking me how my day at work...

A.   10 April 2009: whether or not he has the right to be mad is never the most important thing with guys or girls or anybody. IS he mad? is a different question to, does he hve the right to be mad? No, he doesn't have the right to be mad. Maybe he is mad - ask him.... (read in full...)

Prince Charming must have died

Q.   I'm 18 years old and I've been with my Bf for 7 months (mind you this is my first bf) So the problem is I'm bored. We don't go anywhere And we only see each other at least once a week. When we do see each other we just watch TV and movies (and ...

A.   10 April 2009: i disagree! i don't think ur being a pouty princess. ur a young woman in a relationship that has become slightly less than fulfilling. people can become complacent in a relationship and sometimes someone can get bored. Try to make sure when... (read in full...)

Is this karma getting me back because I flirted with another girl?

Q.   To get the to the point, we were dating for 4 years and 11 months she left me for another man (she's done this twice, I took her back the first time) and she won't come back to me no matter how much I say I love her or say I can do this. I'll admi...

A.   10 April 2009: It sounds like a very very messed up trial to me. Move on. Let life be the way it is and try to find better things. If you get back together, maybe it's supposed to be that way. but atm, ur apart, so try to move on and let go. ... (read in full...)

At the end of the day, does age really decide whether you will be "together forever"?

Q.   I always see people making comments such as "you're too young, it will never last" and "it won't last forever because you're too young". But I was wondering, is that actually a general belief? Does everyone think that, just because you are in your ...

A.   10 April 2009: It's all depending. some couples make it. some don't. Just enjoy the experience. if you make it, congrats. if you don't, it wasn't meant to be. stop guessing wat the future holds and just enjoy what the present has given u! :) it's true that you're ... (read in full...)

Am I asking too much to tell her NOT to see the "friends" she cheated on me with?

Q.   My girlfriend that I'm still with cheated on me about a year ago and we have been fighting more and more now. She cheated on me with her friend "lets call her the Bitch" that's a girl and her boyfriend and now my GF can't understand why I don't want ...

A.   23 March 2009: you're not supposed to be okay with it. I don't think she's worth the agro if she's pulling stunts like this. I think you should move on - i also think it's within your right to ask her not to see them anymore. It is harsh, but if you can't trust ... (read in full...)

Use vibrator for stimulationj want boyfriend involved!

Q.   I don't honestly know how to say this but the other week my boyfriend and I were having anal sex. It's a regular thing. But when he 'pulled out' I emptied my bowels involuntarily. At first I thought something was wrong and my boyfriend was a bit ...

A.   23 March 2009: really the only reason you feel the need to do this is because of the incident that happened. if you emptied your bowels naturally before hand you wouldn't need to do this would you? And if you're involuntarily emptying your bowels after anal sex, ... (read in full...)

I don't know how to tell my casual lover that my period is late!

Q.   i have been talkin to this guy for almost two months but we arent datin or bf or gf or anything bc we both just got out of long relationships and are scared to get close to someone else. well weve had sex a couple times and i missed a couple bc this ...

A.   21 February 2009: Find out if you are pregnant first - don't tell him anything until you know for sure. And if you're pregnant, just tell him. Old enough to have casual sex, old enough to deal with the consequences. Best of luck. x... (read in full...)

Should I believe g/f never got horny with other guys?

Q.   My girl friend had a 6 month relationship in HS where the did some kissing and heavy petting (she stroked him, he touched her down there, etc) - a few times. Then she met this jerk that had her give him a couple BJs (forced her head down), and had ...

A.   6 February 2009: Why would she want to make you think you're better than you are? Trust me, feel complimented, flattered and stop wondering if she's lying! You have no reason to distrust her. If she never felt comfortable with any of them and felt like she was bein... (read in full...)

Should I believe g/f never got horny with other guys?

Q.   My girl friend had a 6 month relationship in HS where the did some kissing and heavy petting (she stroked him, he touched her down there, etc) - a few times. Then she met this jerk that had her give him a couple BJs (forced her head down), and had ...

A.   6 February 2009: Why would she want to make you think you're better than you are? Trust me, feel complimented, flattered and stop wondering if she's lying! You have no reason to distrust her. If she never felt comfortable with any of them and felt like she was bein... (read in full...)

Why does he kiss for so long?

Q.   I enjoy kissing my boyfriend . The only problem is , when we kiss , he likes to kiss foreverrr . I always push him away and start over and again , he continues to kiss for soooo long . I want to give him pecks sometimes but he continues to kiss and ...

A.   5 February 2009: You should feel flattered! And it IS sweet that he's so passionate so please don't take it for granted (and i'm sure that you're not :D ) but i do know it can be a hassle. For me i don't like kisses that last FOREVER because i find it so much more... (read in full...)

I want to ejaculate on her face, how to convince her?

Q.   my girlfriend and i have done a lot sexually. we have both performed oral on each other, she likes it when pull out and cum on her, and she has even let me cum in her mouth and on her face once. i only recently told her that i would like cum on her ...

A.   5 February 2009: You just need to talk to her and ask her. Does she like it? Yes - will she let you do it? yes - then great. But if the answer to EITHER of these is no, then your fantasy should remain just a fantasy. And the other advisers aren't so much trying t... (read in full...)

Sex with her is rather messy..is there a way to approach this with her?

Q.   I have recently started seeing this great girl, the relationship is going well and the sex is great. However, there is one thing that I feel a little awkward talking to her about. She is fortunate in that she can orgasm very easily, literall...

A.   5 February 2009: I think you should just tell her that you'd rather put a towel down - ask if it's okay (which it should be, so not a big deal, you both make a mess - you're part of the reason she makes a mess - so it's there to stop you both from making a mess, not ... (read in full...)

Is it illegal to get fellatio from an underage girl?

Q.   my neighbor is 16 yrs old and im 21, and shes really into me and wants to have sex but i told her that i wouldnt cuz of i didnt wanna go to jail... so she said that she would give me a blowjob but idk if thats consider illegal???...

A.   23 November 2008: I'm not sure if it's illegal or not. I think it should be. And not only that, but she's 16! You're 5 years older than her, you shouldn't even be considering accepting this offer. She's young and inexperienced and shouldn't partake in sexual ... (read in full...)

I told him I want to wait but he carries on asking me. Is he desperate for sex?

Q.   Well av bin with my boyfriend a few months now. He is a virgin and so am I, he is always asking me if I wanna trade v's with him, I mean I do but I want to wait so its special i have already told him this but he carries on asking me. Is he desperat...

A.   23 November 2008: Just tell him that you definitely aren't ready, and if he respects that he'll stop asking you. And you're not saying never but it's definitely not now. You have to be firm and don't give up on it and tell him there's more things to a relationship ... (read in full...)

My husband is very selfish in bed!

Q.   I have been married for a year and the problem is that I think my husband doesn't love me. The only time when he kisses me or hugs me is when he wants to have sex. To make it worse, when we have sex it is all about him, receiving massages, oral sex ...

A.   18 November 2008: I know you already said you talked about it but you just need to talk about it again. Be absolute. You can't be in an unloving, unfulfilling relationship where you feel like you are wanted only for the sexual pleasure of someone else. Sex is ... (read in full...)

I really like this guy but he is straight, what can I do?

Q.   hey there. there is this guy that i really like. he has already had sex with a girl, but I really, really, really like him. I mainly want to lay beside him or on top of him in bed, but he is straight and i dont know what to do. please help me ...

A.   15 October 2008: I'm sorry but if you're 100% sure he is straight then.. there's nothing you can really do but move on honey. ... (read in full...)

I cry in bed when my boyfriend has fallen asleep. Why does this happen?

Q.   For the past few months I find myself crying in bed with my boyfriend. He does not know because I wait until he has fallen asleep. It is only when I am in bed with him, not when I'm alone. We have had no problems in our relationship and he has been ...

A.   13 September 2008: you really have to answer this question yourself sweetie. Are you happy when you cry? or sad? the fact that you mention that he's been a perfect boyfriend makes me think it's sad, as you're crying about something in the relationship, or a feeling ... (read in full...)

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