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*issKin agony aunt

*issKin

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*issKin's profile:

Hi all. Have been using this site for a long time.

I'm in my mid 20's, in a long term relationship and have been with my significant other for over three years.

Hope to be able to provide fair and honest advice to people without judging.

Latest articles:

How to be secure in love...

This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

11 October 2008: How to be secure in love... When you enter a relationship, it opens up hundreds, thousands of uncertain feelings. Little potholes in our sanity and they can easily make their ways into becoming tunnels. I was the most confident person in the wo...

Sex is a funny thing...

This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted

13 January 2008: I have recently started going out with a guy that I am CRAZY about. I really love him and our relationship has moved really quickly. We were close friends first and both rather secretive about feeling anything more for the other, afraid to ruin what ...

< Prev12345678910Next > [10 pages, 360 answers]

I know I'm wasting my life on this teacher...question is, how do I tear myself away?

Q.   Hey Okay, where do i begin? I dont know what to do anymore, Its upsetting me and frustrating at the same time. Im in love with a teacher, I know that i cant be with him, I know the the age gap is too big a deal, I know tht he is the same as my...

A.   27 April 2008: To be honest, yeah it probably shows he was thinking about you. Lol but you did say you didn't want advice about whether he liked you or not and you wanted to know how to get over him - obviously spending time with him, walking to class with him and ... (read in full...)

I really don't know if I lost my virginity or not, please advise me.

Q.   I was hooking up with this guy a while back. We had agreed not to have sex because I'm still a virgin and want to stay that way, and he's never been with a virgin and doesn't want to be. He was rubbing his penis along the inside of my labia and he ...

A.   7 April 2008: It sounds like he may have broken your hymen. He may have even almost penetrated you or penetrated you just barely but i doubt he actually did otherwise you both realy would have known about it. I'd say it was an 'almost'. this doesn't mean you've ... (read in full...)

I'm 14, my girlfriend is 15 and pregnant, we need some advice please.

Q.   Hi i'm 14 and my girlfreind (15) is pregnant. We havn't told our parents because we're worried about how they will react. We don't know what we should do but we are definitely keeping the baby. Help us, what should we do?????...

A.   6 April 2008: You're keeping the baby. you've already made the hardest decision. You can't hide it from your parents. The next step is to tell them, regardless of what they say and do you can't hide it from them. If they're there for you then good if not then too ... (read in full...)

Really stressed and haven't had period but pregnancy test is negative.

Q.   My boyfriend and I had protected sex twice (once, 14 days into my cycle, the second, about 21 days into my cycle). Normally, I notice when I'm ovulating, and I don't remember ovulating during the usual time-frame (mid-cycle, so around the 14th) but ...

A.   6 April 2008: It could be stress. it could be weight loss. if you're worried about pregnancy, even though you used protection it's far more unlikely, but i suggest taking another pregnancy test or even seeing your doctor to have a professional test to make sure. ... (read in full...)

I've had a wierd experience after sex on the pill....is this common?

Q.   I have A rather funny question.. since I've started the pill when me and my boyfriend have finished having sex, come just comes out of me but I think its his because the pill stops sperm getting past a mucus ( so I believe) and it didnt happen when ...

A.   6 April 2008: Lol. It's okay don't worry. It's not because you're on the pill. The pill makes it harder/impossible for sperm to reach the egg but even if you weren't on the pill and you had unprotected sex (which u wudnt) sex without a condom always leads to the ... (read in full...)

If we spend too much time together he grates on my nerves!

Q.   I've been with my boyfriend 3 months. I am really falling for him, but I find if we spend too much time together, he really grates on my nerves. Do you think this is normal, or is it a sign that it's not going to work out long term? Sorry i...

A.   6 April 2008: Hmm no i think it can be considered normal. People need their space. It's like when you spend too much time with your family and you drive each other crazy. It doesn't mean you're not working out. As long as you're both happy and you try your best... (read in full...)

Does any one have any alternative suggestions for shaving/waxing for me please?

Q.   Hi this may sound really daft but i have tried using waxing strips and i cannot get them to work, but shaving sum times makes my legs get rashy. I find shaving my private regions hard because i wear glasses and wen without them on i can hardly ...

A.   6 April 2008: I suggest filling the bath with a small amount of water and sitting on the edge of the bath (so you're not submerged in it and therefore can still wear your glasses) and just using the water to dampen and soften your private area for shaving or ... (read in full...)

I know I'm wasting my life on this teacher...question is, how do I tear myself away?

Q.   Hey Okay, where do i begin? I dont know what to do anymore, Its upsetting me and frustrating at the same time. Im in love with a teacher, I know that i cant be with him, I know the the age gap is too big a deal, I know tht he is the same as my...

A.   6 April 2008: I've been through this. You love him for being so nice but hate him for everything nice because you don't want to love him. i never told anyone i ever loved my ex-secondary school teacher, or that the reason i cried so much on the last day was ... (read in full...)

He loves me and I love him but his temper causes him to hit me and I'm pregnant!

Q.   Me and my boyfriend have just turned two years and I'm five months pregnant with a beautiful little girl. There is one problem though, he has a really bad temper. Sometimes he throws me around or slaps the back of my head hard and I atleast cry once ...

A.   5 April 2008: Okay so you love each other but leave him. Leave him. leave him. Not forever. But make him see what he's doing to you. Make him go and see anger management counsellors. Don't stick around if he's hitting you. but if he really is willing to... (read in full...)

Is there any way to be in a relationship with your teacher without any problems?

Q.   Okay lets say you love your teacher and then you find out he loves you back....cant there be someway for the two to be together with out any problems??...

A.   5 April 2008: No. not really. Not until you leave school. And even then if the school suspects something went on between you two during school years, he could lose his job. People will always look down on you for it, even though they shouldn't really but they... (read in full...)

I have a boy friend who loves me a lot but he never cares for me, he even forgot my birthday this year.

Q.   I have a boy friend who loves me a lot but he never cares for me, he even forgot my birthday this year. If I tell him about break up he tells he can't live without me and that he loves me truely and doesn't know to express it but I have completly ...

A.   3 April 2008: I think you should move on. You say 'he loves you a lot' but he 'doesn't care for you'? Love is caring for each other. Love is.. a whole lot of stuff really and if he isn't doing what you want him to or need him to and doesn't seem to be taking m... (read in full...)

Is it wrong to make your boyfriend or girlfriend choose between you and a friend?

Q.   Is it wrong to make your boyfriend or girlfriend choose between you and a friend of theirs that they have had for a while?? I mean even if you think you have a good reason??...

A.   3 April 2008: It is wrong. Mostly because it puts the person you love into a compromising situation. When asked "who would you pick if you had to pick between me and him?" I said, "I would pick the person who didn't ask me to choose." So if my boyfrien... (read in full...)

A statement we should all abide by.

Q.   TELL THE TRUTH ITS THE BEST...

A.   1 April 2008: I hate the idea that the truth is best. The truth is great. There is no better thing than the truth. This isn't a question either but never mind. I think the truth stinks. How much better is blissful ignorance to informed pain? How much better i... (read in full...)

I've had anal sex for the first time and think I'm pregnant but my mom does not know this and she'a making me take a laxative, can it harm my unborn child?

Q.   Ok here goes, I've had anal sex for the first time and think I'm pregnant but my mom does not know this and she'a making me take a laxative, can it harm my unborn child?...

A.   1 April 2008: Okay i'm thoroughly confused. You do know you can't get pregnant through anal sex right? Not unless the sperm found it's way to the vagina outside of the anal opening there's not much chance that you could be pregnant from this. Why is your mum... (read in full...)

I'm nervous to be seen naked by my boyfriend.

Q.   I really want to have sex with my boyfriend but I am kinda nervous being naked around him! I've tried to like get over it but it just wont go away! I really like my boyfriend and he would never force me to do anything I didnt like! I am dying to ...

A.   31 March 2008: You're nervous because you're female and it's natural to be nervous about being seen naked, especially by someone you love so much because you're automatically - instinctually afraid of rejection Do you like the way you look? is that an issue? ... (read in full...)

MY boyfriend wishes for me to give him oral.... I'm a virgin and I don't know how to do it...

Q.   MY boyfriend wants me to give him oral.... I'm a virgin and I don't know how to do it.... I'm kinda nervous about it... do I swallow or spit..? What exactly do I do? Can you get STD's? Do you use a condom? I don't know. Please help if you can ! ...

A.   31 March 2008: If ur worried about STD's - use a condom, always. And if you're using a condom there is no spit/swallow question. And if ur not using a condom and u know he's clean (which im guessing u dont if ur asking about transmitted diseases) then spitting or ... (read in full...)

When you have an orgasm, does it feel like you're going to pee?

Q.   When you have an orgasm, does it feel like you're going to pee? like I mean when I'm with my guy, it feels like im going to pee and even when he's doing oral stuff on me.. i feel like im going to pee, is that normal? im afraid I will so I alway...

A.   30 March 2008: I disagree with Natasia btw. It is normal for quite a few women to feel this way and u don't need to see a doctor. I feel this way quite often during sex, when masturbating i never felt this way but during sex I do. You've just gotta push past it. ... (read in full...)

I've never bled before while having sex but I did this time. What could have happened?

Q.   My boyfriend and I were in bed, and he started to finger me, it hurt a bit, I'm not sure why because I'm not a virgin or anything and he's fingerd me before, after a while I noticed I was bleeding, what could have happened? ...

A.   30 March 2008: He could have simply scratched you with his nails or snagged something inside you a little too roughly. I find if i get 'rubbed' inside too hard while being fingered i bleed a bit. I shouldn't worry too much unless the bleeding is still occu... (read in full...)

I don't feel ready... but he does.

Q.   I really need help. I recently got this boyfriend and we like each other alot. He is a couple years older and I feel that I need to be up to his standards. I feel too young to be doing anything and I don't want to but I feel pressured and I feel ...

A.   29 March 2008: The major problem with being someone older when you're still so young yourself is the problem you're facing right now - you often find yourself at very different stages to one another. Don't let yourself do anything you're not ready to. It's nat... (read in full...)

I've had phone sex with 3 different guys....is that disgusting?

Q.   Hi I need some opinions on this . I'm 15 years old and I've had phone sex with 3 different guys in the last two years . ( not at the same time or around the same time....) Two of them it was text sex and the other one ( my boyfriend now)was actually ...

A.   27 March 2008: You're not acting like a whore. Phone sex is a lot better than actual sex at your age and it can be fun. Ignore your friend, she obviously isn't mature enough to understand the intimacy. I think it's espcially good that one of these men you were ... (read in full...)

After sex it hurts when I pee but it's not an infection. What could it be?

Q.   hiya :) i have sex with my partner alot usually everytime we see eacother which is 4days a week .. but after we have sex my private parts are always hurting and its hurting wen i do a pee .. i dont know what it is .. its like a burny feeling ...

A.   26 March 2008: Did you get checked for all types of infections? Bladder infections/water infections, yeast infections, sti's and std's? Maybe your partner is being too rough with you during sex and it's causing some irritation and pain? Maybe you need to use m... (read in full...)

Is it okay to be there for your ex when he is down?

Q.   Me and my boyfriend of 3 years have broken up for a week now and it's been goin well, i have jus been goin up n down with emotionss.. we didn't talk until las nite he said dat he is sorry for doin this to me but he was jus havin a break down and...

A.   25 March 2008: Yes it is okay. If it feels okay to you then yes, it's perfectly fine. I think it's very mature and very sweet of you to still care about him and want to be there for him even though you've had a rough time together just recently. I think he need... (read in full...)

I'm fifteen and want a baby with my boyfriend (16), should I wait?

Q.   Ok your gonna all think I'm absoultely crazy and some may tell me I need mental help but please tell me your thoughts about what I'm about to tell you ok. Ever since I was very young I've wanted a baby.I'm 15 years old now . I know I'm going t...

A.   25 March 2008: Yes, you should wait. I can tell you've thought a lot about it and you're obviously very passionate about the subject but you're only fifteen! Fifteen is too young to be having children when you're technically still a child yourself. Wait until ... (read in full...)

Had unprotected sex...now I am late...could I be pregant??

Q.   hi all, I need some advice. I had sex with my bf on thurs nite and it was unprotected stupid i know but i was due on my period yesterday and it hasn't come i'm normally bang on time. Could i be pregnant?...

A.   23 March 2008: Yes. Any unprotected sex or any chance of sperm coming into contact with your vagina can lead to pregnancy. You should know this. I think it's unfortunate that you didn't think to use a condom. Get a test done. If ur doing a home test - make sure... (read in full...)

Why do they lose their respect for me when I'm such a caring GF?

Q.   I dont know where Im goin wrong with guys and I need some advice. Every relationship I have had, whether long-term or short-term, it always ends because they lose their respect for me and walk all over me. I dont know why this happens because I am a ...

A.   23 March 2008: This is hard because on instinct ur a caring, doting girlfriend who never wants to do any wrong. But you have to realise that sometimes it's not your turn to apologise and you have to make guys realise that they can't walk all over you. Try putting ... (read in full...)

He's told me that oral sex is something that he looks at as degrading and I've never had someone that loves me as he does - other guys feel this way?

Q.   I'm in a relationship with a very wonderful guy. We compliment each other very well and have a very healthy relationship and can talk freely about any issues we have or feelings that need to be resolved. But there's one problem -- I can't understand ...

A.   23 March 2008: My boyfriend always thought blowjobs were 'degrading', he says he got this from watching things like porn - where guys are always shown to be quite forceful through the action. Blowjobs are actually really intimate and after i persuaded my boyfriend ... (read in full...)

I'm gutted I may have lost a very good friend...but was I wrong to tell my other friend what she was saying??

Q.   I have 2 best friends whom I love to bits. One of them, Clare, is closer to me than the other one is, we are more like sisters than best friends. The other day I heard Clare bitching about our other best friend to someone and it was wrong because ...

A.   23 March 2008: It's okay to stick up for your friend that's for sure but to be honest... I don't think I would have told my friend what was being said about her, simply because I know it's considered 'stirring' when someone bitches to you (or you hear them ... (read in full...)

Is anal that bad?

Q.   hey well i have erm quite an embarrassing question, my boyfriend and i have recently decided to become sexually active. we have decided to wait till next month at least when im 16, as he is 19 and we love each other too much to cause any trouble. we ...

A.   21 March 2008: I'm quite impressed to hear that you're going to wait until you're sixteen! That's definitely a mature attitude to have. As for anal. Well, i suggest asking to do it to him first - just so you know that he definitely knows what he's going to be p... (read in full...)

What are the causes of a missed period, apart from pregnancy?

Q.   Could anyone help me here... What are the causes of a missed period, apart from pregnancy? If its stress related, why does it not come? What happens?...

A.   21 March 2008: The website Mandy has provided provides the main reasons why you could miss a period, so it's worth a look. As for why stress causes a missed period... I think it's something to do with a psychological thing. When you become stressed your body crea... (read in full...)

In a loving relationship with my cousin, how do we tell our parents?

Q.   i am just in a fix! i honestly dont know what to do, i hope to get help from anyone, the thing is, im in a relationship, but with my cousin, 1st cousin, i love him alot ever since we were small. and then back in december 2006 i told him how i f...

A.   21 March 2008: It is custom in England and the USA to frown upon inter-family relationships, especially with someone as close as first cousins. I don't know how your parents think or what the general consensus where you live is, so i can't predict the initial ... (read in full...)

Why would a guy say he wasn't wearing a condom when he was?

Q.   why would a guy say he wasn't wearing a condom and ask if he could let go when he was in fact wearing one? He said it was just to heighten the heat of the moment but it freaked me out and I didn't understand that....

A.   20 March 2008: I'd be rather concerned about the fact that you let him have sex with you when you thought he wasn't wearing one? Is that what happened or have i misinterpreted the question? If he wasn't wearing one, you could have gotten pregnant or caught a ... (read in full...)

Help! I'm confused...

Q.   With the same guy for 15 years, got engaged last July 2007 were supposed to be wed May 17.2008 and on February llth he told me he loves me like a room mate and not with the pazzaz. We called off the wedding and I moved back home. Tells me he still ...

A.   20 March 2008: What do you want to do? You obviously don't know. How do you feel about him? I'm guessing you obviously love him a lot or else you wouldn't be so hurt. You should know from your own experiences that emotions are sometimes hard to define and some... (read in full...)

I would not have married her, had I known of her wild sexual past! What now?

Q.   What do you do when you find out your wife has had a wild sexual past and you didnt know about it and if you had known about it, you would not have even asked her to marry you?...

A.   20 March 2008: I think you have to ask yourself: do you love her? Despite her past? Everybody has a past, does she know everything about your past? What if she found out something about your past that she did not like and if she had known before, would have mad... (read in full...)

It burns when we have sex. We don't use condoms. Could that be the problem?

Q.   when my parnter and i have sex at first its fine but after a while it starts to burn her inside and we have to stop. we dont use comdoms as she has a coile could that be the problem ...

A.   19 March 2008: Oh! Remember aswell that condoms are the only thing that protect against STI/STD's. If there's any chance either of you could have anything that could be causing this problem (or if there's any chance at all of having anything) please do get tested ... (read in full...)

It burns when we have sex. We don't use condoms. Could that be the problem?

Q.   when my parnter and i have sex at first its fine but after a while it starts to burn her inside and we have to stop. we dont use comdoms as she has a coile could that be the problem ...

A.   19 March 2008: I'm not sure if the fact that she was a coil could be a problem, but it is best for her to get herself checked out by her GP or at a free clinic to make sure nothing seriously bad is going on. It could just be that after awhile it gets a bit 'dry... (read in full...)

I'm So confused, I want to know the truth, is he STRAIGHT or BI

Q.   hello sorry this is pure long but I could describe what happened in a short version,but anyway i'm a 16 year old gay guy, I had some friends staying at mines just last friday, so basically what happened was, me and this guy were really drinking ...

A.   19 March 2008: Because you were both (by the sounds of it) drunk, you can't be sure of why anything happened or his motives behind anything. If he knows you like him and he didn't automatically say 'i'm not gay' or something similar to that then i'm guessing he's ... (read in full...)

He left all of a sudden in order to get back with his ex. He never explained why and it hurts.

Q.   ok so there's this guy i have been talking to. And he had just recently stopped talking to an ex girlfriend of 2 years. we met and there was an instant connection we were talking for about 7 months until he just all of a sudden just leaves me to get ...

A.   19 March 2008: This action obviously shows you his true colours and perhaps you were lucky to get out of it while you were in the 'beginning' phase of love rather than full blown. Maybe he never had any intentions of getting back with his ex and suddenly deci... (read in full...)

He confuses me, what should I do?

Q.   Hi, I have been talking to someone for about two months and we became really close, he said he liked me and now changed his mind saying he wanted space, he confuses me. What can I do? ...

A.   19 March 2008: To be honest, all you really should do is respect his decision and give him some space. Maybe he'll come to his senses and decides he definitely wants to be with you. People can confuse how they feel sometimes and the way you feel confused migh... (read in full...)

Do you think he'll hate me? Some opinion's please.

Q.   Hey everyone. For reason's which are not important; I was house bound because of severe depression. Thus to help the time pass I went online. I ended up talking to this guy. I'd heard people say lie about your age, what you look like, where you live ...

A.   19 March 2008: Oh dear. Lying for protection on the internet is all very well and good but people often forget the emotions that can transpire through online relationships. I had an 'internet boyfriend' long-distance, for three years, I rang him - he rang me.... (read in full...)

How long could my period be delayed by stress??

Q.   I need your advice.. My period should have started over a week ago, so I took a pregnancy test, and it showed up negative. Yet, my period still hasn't started.. They've always been pretty regular, what's wrong? If it's delayed because of ...

A.   17 March 2008: I once went without a period for six months due to family and school related stress. I went to see my doctor to make sure there was nothing wrong though, because you never know what's causing you to miss a period. I would take Mandy's advice and get ... (read in full...)

A cousin question...

Q.   Ok so I am 15 and my cousin now 16. We are both males. When he comes over my house to play video games and stuff like that I always have an erection when I look at him. Sometimes I would peer at his "area" and see a bulge sometimes. When I play hit ...

A.   17 March 2008: It's typical for teenage boys (and teenage girls for that matter) to be curious and confused about their sexuality and sexual feelings. You may both be feeling curious and confused. However, the fact that he is your cousin provides the main problem. ... (read in full...)

What can I do to please my new boyfriend?

Q.   So, i have a new boyfriend. and we have touched and rubbed each other. Mostly i'm the one that's being touched and rubbed, but he told me (in a nice respective way) that he'd like to get some pleasure too. But I don't know what to do. I'm not rea...

A.   12 March 2008: Ask him what he wants? In the same way he rubs you you can rub him in return. If you say what you're not ready for (as you have done here) and then ask him what you can do, i'm sure he'll be willing to help you out. ... (read in full...)

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