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... Send *issKin a private message | | | *issKin's profile:Hi all. Have been using this site for a long time.
I'm in my mid 20's, in a long term relationship and have been with my significant other for over three years.
Hope to be able to provide fair and honest advice to people without judging. |
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| Latest articles: How to be secure in love...
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
11 October 2008: How to be secure in love... When you enter a relationship, it opens up hundreds, thousands of uncertain feelings. Little potholes in our sanity and they can easily make their ways into becoming tunnels. I was the most confident person in the wo...
Sex is a funny thing...
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
13 January 2008: I have recently started going out with a guy that I am CRAZY about. I really love him and our relationship has moved really quickly. We were close friends first and both rather secretive about feeling anything more for the other, afraid to ruin what ...
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Advice on pill and periods
Q. Ive been taking the pill where u dont have periods, ive had this pill for 3 months now and on my last pack, When i first took the pill the first month i had a very lite period that lasted a day then nothing since then then past day or so iv...
A. 29 June 2010: It depends on which pill you're specifically on. I was on the minipill which 'stops' your period. However, with me, as i was overweight when i went onto the pill i didn't have a period for four months and then i had constant spotting throughout the ... (read in full...)
The condom came off
Q. Hey. Im so worried i am pregnant; well i am 16, and i have only had sex once with this lad from where i go on holiday, who i am in a relationship with. We had sex again the last time i was there, (about 4 days ago) and at first it was fine, we ...
A. 18 June 2010: He may have felt it coming off :S i'm really not sure. I should think so because usually condoms are quite tight and you'd notice one suddenly not being on anymore. If he didn't ejaculate outside of the condom, and put another one on without ... (read in full...)
Why does she essentially require that I have an erection during oral sex?
Q. My fiance and I have a pretty good sex life but it's not without some quirks. I've always enjoyed giving her oral sex. She claims that I'm the first who has been able to bring her to orgasm this way. The problem is that she essentially requ...
A. 18 June 2010: I think it's reasonable in the sense that she just wants you to be excited about performing oral sex on her and being engaged in sexual activity in general you're 'expected' to be excited physically, and it's a really sensitive subject.
It's comp... (read in full...)
I feel guilty about him being in jail for choking me
Q. I am trying to figure out why I feel guilty, Makes no since other then I have feelings. I put my X-Boyfriend in jail for choking me,come to find out he had been doing Meth and cheating on top of all the mental abuse. He would tell me that I had pr...
A. 12 June 2010: You can't help who you love, bt you can stop urself from being with them. He's in prison. He deserves to be there. Move on with your life.
You feel guilty because something bad has happened to somebody you have feelings for. This is always the case... (read in full...)
The 'break' is going to be permanent. Do I tell her there's someone else?
Q. I initiated a "break" with my girlfriend about two weeks ago. Since then, I have started seeing and sleeping with a co-worker. I really like this new girl, and it seems the feeling is mutual. I am meeting with my "ex" in a few days. A chance f...
A. 26 May 2010: Don't tell her about the person you're seeing. It's unnecessary. It's not nice to lie, but it would be worse to tell her a truth that would hurt.
And Yes. she really needs to know that the relationship is over. And! when you're meeting to talk abou... (read in full...)
Shocked that he's with someone else so soon after our break up
Q. I broke up with my long distance ex-boyfriend 3 weeks ago. I've decided no contact with him is best for me to get over him, so we haven't spoken since the break up. I just found out that he's in a new relationship. It's been 3 weeks!! I wa...
A. 26 May 2010: I think you should delete him from facebook. and twitter. and from your phone. and your contacts on msn. and from any email accounts you have (any messages he sent you) and completely cleanse yourself but don't forget it all completely, treat is a ... (read in full...)
Why stinky toes?
Q. Dear Cupid. I know this isn't about sex or relationship but it's generally about my body. When I cut the nails of my big toes, I cut them as far as I can and when i do that, this horrible smell comes out and I think it's because in an already si...
A. 23 May 2010: also! don't cut your nails really really far back. they're not meant to be cut all the way back. it can lead to impurities getting under your nail in some cases.
... (read in full...)
Why stinky toes?
Q. Dear Cupid. I know this isn't about sex or relationship but it's generally about my body. When I cut the nails of my big toes, I cut them as far as I can and when i do that, this horrible smell comes out and I think it's because in an already si...
A. 23 May 2010: Umm i think it could be a fungus. u saying it 'comes out when you cut your nails'... sounds like it's umm under your nails :s i'm not a foot-expert but i suggest seeing a doctor. It's probably not a really bad illness, you could be over-cleansing ... (read in full...)
He promised me forever, ...but here I am single after only 4 months.
Q. I recently broke up with my boyfriend, we were only together for 4 months but he pormised we'd always be together, and he was moving away..and promised me long distance would work. However after a week we broke up :( He's over it completely and ...
A. 29 April 2010: You're too young to be tied down 'forever' hunny. Just relish what you had, try to look forward. Let yourself feel what you feel, but dnt spend days upon days moping over it. You can feel sad and at the same time you can go shopping with your ... (read in full...)
Why does it take women so long to respond sometimes?
Q. I love women and don't have a lot of experience with them (either friends or girlfriends). But I'm having a difficult time understanding something and I don't know if it's "normal." I have a friend. Long story short, we developed a clos...
A. 19 March 2010: Lol! i ask this all the time about my boyfriend!! :P so it's not just a girl thing. My boyfriend can take like forever to reply to a facebook comment and/or a text and emails? i dont even GET a reply :P
It's not just women, its people indi... (read in full...)
Where do I fall in his list of priorities?
Q. I asked my boyfriend where am I on his priority list he says I'm #3... I wish I was #1. He is #1 to me. Is that unfair? For me to be unhappy about being #3 on his priority list? ...
A. 19 March 2010: What are his other priorities? :)
it's not UNfair to want to be number one on his list of priorities! :) But it's not always realistic.
I recently had this conversation with my bf.
I'm number 2 on his priority list :P but im number one on his "... (read in full...)
Strange bumps...
Q. Well, lately I have been getting these bumps or whatever on me. They look like they are bug bites but they cant be because winter just got over and bugs arent out yet. So far I have had nine in the last month and half and they show up at random t...
A. 19 March 2010: ... we're not doctors on this site, but it is a valid question so u shudnt be worried about posting it. But, the main response ur going to receive is 'go to a doctor' and go it soon. best of luck. xx... (read in full...)
I beat up the drunk who groped my GF, now she's mad at me. What gives?
Q. My GF and I were at a bar and while were standing at the bar waiting for our drinks, some dirtbag in his late 50's comes up to us, drunk off his arse. Stands between my GF and me and puts one arm around my shoulder and one around my GFs. We did ...
A. 2 March 2010: I think the fact that you cared enough about the situation shouldn't be ignore. Your girlfriend is mad at how far you took it (but personally i don't blame you. I'd have beat him up myself if he did that to me. He shouldn't be allowed to grope ... (read in full...)
Can you get anything longer lasting for your nails other than nail varnish?
Q. I have long natural nails, the length of your typical false nail. I more often than not wear a 'french manicure' style varnish with the white tips.. My problem is that the nail varnish doesn't last long and often chips or flakes off, so i'm ...
A. 25 February 2010: You can use clear nail varnish to protect the coating! (this has never worked for me though). In avon i saw an 'acrylic nail varnish' that's supposed to be strong and everything... maybe worth a look? ... (read in full...)
When I menstruate..I am in so much pain! What can I do?
Q. hiya, well im 14 and my periods get really sore, so sore that i cant even move out of my bed, its a mission trying to get to the toilet. so i was wondering if anyone could help me. i want to ask my mum about contraceptive pills, they can regulate my ...
A. 23 February 2010: Talk to your Gp! They can often recommend something. They can recommend what kind of pain killers work best or if there's anything else that they can do to soften the pain! :) I used to suffer with absolutely AWFUL back aches whenever i had my ... (read in full...)
I like having nights to myself, but my girlfriend wants to be with me, all the time! Advice?
Q. Hi, I have a bit of a problem with my girlfriend... I can't remember the last time I went a night without seeing her. It was probably about 8 days ago now. I'm the kind of guy who likes time alone, or in the company of guys (this is common, right...
A. 23 February 2010: You say you're doing it 'even when you don't really want to' and it's 'just to make her happy'. You should be doing things because you want to and only when you want to. I know relationships aren't always about getting what you want but they are ... (read in full...)
Do you think this guy is married?
Q. Dear Aunts and Uncles, I would like you to put your detective hats on and help me out please. The Brief: So I've known this guy for a few months but I have a suspicion that he may be married and would really like your opinion. Facts: Sinc...
A. 19 February 2010: I'm thinking 'marrried or with partner', but only because you mentioned it lol.
I'm not sure if he IS married. there's definitely something flakey going on. But maybe that's all it is? maybe thats the kind of person he is? Or maybe he IS marr... (read in full...)
Is it right to give an engagement ring during an argument?
Q. Is it a bad idea to give a engagement ring during a argument or a break up to try to mend things back together if you really love that person?...
A. 19 February 2010: Engagement rings don't solve problems. They don't magically heal any rift that is between you. If you are arguing or breaking up with somebody, regardless of if you love them, how do you think an engagement ring will fix things? People who are ... (read in full...)
Why do people think it is so horrible for sixteen year olds to have sex?
Q. I'm 16 and have been dating this boy for almost two years now. He's 19 and he was my first, but I wasn't his. I was just wondering why everyone seems to consider sex at my age so horrible? I have never once regretted my decision. Of course the first ...
A. 19 February 2010: It depends what you mean by 'horrible'. If you mean horrible in the sense that people think it doesn't feel good or isn't pleasurable, it's because your body is still so young and having sex can be traumatic to your body and the complications that ... (read in full...)
I want to marry her but she is just too worried I will leave her.
Q. Hi i am in love with a Russian girl, who is now 19 and i am 22 year old in India,. i am a security trainee in National guards of the country and also a student (majorly in university) the problem is that my girl always asks me when i will come...
A. 5 February 2010: three years is a long time to wait for somebody you've never met. especially wth such a distance between you. Physically being with someone is really really different to talking. A physical in-contact relationship will develop differently once you ... (read in full...)
I don't like my father's inappropriate behaviour! Should I be worried?
Q. I think my father is acting really weird. I've never been too close to him and whenever he wanted to kiss or hug me like my mother does, i silently rejected him because I didn't like it. That made him angry and we started to argue about unimportant ...
A. 5 February 2010: I think u should just avoid any contact with him. Be plain with him. Keep telling him it's inappropriate and wrong and you don't like it. Don't let it go any further - if it ever was going to. It could be a misunderstanding but even if it WAS just a ... (read in full...)
Am I sick for doing what I'm doing?
Q. My friends and me were goofing around one day near some trees in a backyard. We noticed a hole in a bend of the tree trunk and joked how it looked like a butt hole. My friend put his finger in the hole and said it felt gooey. We all did and it f...
A. 5 February 2010: I think you should stop and find a different way to masturbate. It's not exactly right and it's kind of creepy (sorry but it is) so maybe try out some alternative methods and just stop completely. x... (read in full...)
Didn't bleed after sex! Why?
Q. so i've had sex, okay? and idk why, but i havent bled from it, at all. i did it earlier this January. and i've had sex after that too, but still no blood/ he's gone in the whole way, and he's not small either. maybe just cause i'm skinny? idk, can ...
A. 28 January 2010: Some people don't bleed. Some people bleed a lot. It's an each to their own situation in a way. Don't worry about it.... (read in full...)
Why doesn't sex feel good the way people say it should?
Q. when i have sex, it doesnt feeel as good as its described. for some reason, it feeels goood but in a way, hurts. i've done it with only one guy and i lost it this month. why doesnt it feeel like people say?...
A. 28 January 2010: It doesn't feel good because ur young and inexperienced and aren't even old enough to be doing it. And it will hurt, especially at your age and it'll take longer for it to feel good. And you've only done it once, sometimes it takes longer than that. ... (read in full...)
Should I break my own hymen?
Q. So yesterday while masturbating I felt my hymen and I now I don't know if to just pop it or leave it be? So should I pop it or not?...
A. 27 January 2010: ... u really shudnt do anything forceful or unnatural. if u 'break' it naturally during masturbation that's kinda ok, but don't go out of your way to do it on purpose... ... (read in full...)
Why do you think my husband wants me to colour my hair different?
Q. My new husband asked me to change my hair color. Why do you suppose he wanted me to look different?...
A. 26 January 2010: Ask him why.
It cud just be because he wants to see what u'll look like with a different colour on ur hair. U can always say no. ... (read in full...)
I'm running out of ideas for sexy surprises for my long distance boyfriend, can anyone help?
Q. Hi Im 21 and im currently involved in long distance relationship we dated for 2 years and he had to go away for school. Since we talk online we do lots of little sexy surprizes for each other and i run out of ideas! Help please!thank u!...
A. 25 January 2010: sexy surprises! lol if u've genuinely run out, i'd recycle some of the previous things u've done. What good is having something genuinely amazingly sexy if u only ever do it once? also have a look around the internet and u'll pick up some tips but ... (read in full...)
Wife had anal sex with another man, how should I react?
Q. Mod note: had some language and sexual content not suitable for younger aunts and uncles, changed to make it... more friendly. I went to a party with my wife and I forgot to eat beforehand, well I got drunk and passed out. I woke up a couple o...
A. 25 January 2010: How can you cope with not telling her for a week? Confront her about it because soon it'll be too late to confront her about it. The fact that she cheated should be more important than the sexual acts she took part in, but talk to her and decide if ... (read in full...)
Help with first time sex???
Q. Ok your gunna think I'm really wierd. But me and my bf are planning on havin sex, I'm a virgin but he isn't. But the only thing I'm unsure of is myself down below. He prefers it shaved and that's ok. But i've done it and my skin is very prickely ...
A. 8 January 2010: It's not abnormal to be 'prickly' or 'bumpy' after you shave your private area. it's a VERY sensitive area. I personally haven't ever shaved it completely. So i'm going to leave that advice up to the other aunts and uncles.
As for first time sexu... (read in full...)
Why doesn't he tell people we're going out together?
Q. Me and my bf has been dating for 3 yrs and he still can't admit to anyone that I'm his gf and that he loves me. Its been going on since we started dating, he says he loves me and all this but then he's saying to everyone that I'm not his gf,its ...
A. 8 January 2010: tell him it's hurting you! I can understand him not wanting to blurt that he has a girlfriend out to every single person upon first greeting them, but to DENY that your his girlfriend isn't on at all and if he loved you then he wouldn't behave this ... (read in full...)
How can my boyfriend not understand we need to go slow when it comes to losing our virginity?
Q. My boyfriend of a little over a month just tried having sex with me last night. We had not done anything other than making out so at first I thought he was going to finger me but then he unbuttoned his pants. I asked him what we were doing and he ...
A. 24 December 2009: It's not really completely his fault he's 'clueless'. Films and porn and all that stuff, it just doesn't explain the need for foreplay! In movies it just.. happens. in real life it really isn't like that.
If HE's clueless, then take the init... (read in full...)
My girlfriend gives horrible oral, but is more than happy to give it, how can I make her better at it?
Q. I'm with a girl who I love a lot, and things are fantastic... to a point. When I give her oral sex, she loves it, moaning and grabbing and clawing... all the things I could imagine are good signs. But when she goes down on me (she is very willing to ...
A. 24 December 2009: such a sensitive subject! First of all. never use the following words/phrases: 'I can't feel it, I don't like it, It's bad, horrible, not good, you need more practise.'
Don't let on that you've never liked it at all - that will just crush her will... (read in full...)
He says he doesn't like me but everyone else thinks he does. How can I get him to admit it?
Q. ok this guy says he doesnt like me but my friends and i arent crazy we see how he looks at me and he stares and smiles, and he talks to me all the time. Why cant he admit to it and plz tell me wat i can do in order to make him admit faster tht he ...
A. 24 December 2009: Er... not to put a damper on things, but if you ask a guy if he likes you and he says 'no'... you should probably stop trying. Not only that, but trying to force it out of him isn't a nice way to start something off. Why don't you tell him you like ... (read in full...)
I have been building a house, if we broke up, would fiance get the house?
Q. im building a house for the last eight year s with my own money my fiance never wanted anything to do with it were together six year s and have a six month old baby who i adore if we broke up would she be intitled to the house ,...
A. 24 December 2009: If you're married and then split, then yes, youre 'wife' would have an entitlement to what you own. If you sign a prenuptual agreement before you get married, you can state within it that upon splitting she has no entitlement to the house.
If you'... (read in full...)
The right foods to eat???
Q. Cupid hey and thanks for this site. I am Milly and I get stressed up a lot about my size. I've slimmed down a lot so how can i regain fat faster, tell me what i need to eat. thanks so much...
A. 10 December 2009: I'd suggest seeing ur doctor, local gp, whatever. they'll print you out a nutritional diet guide!
But, carbohydrates help you gain weight as long as you eat more than you burn off through daily routines. Reduce all exercising to basics. Keep fit ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend won't have sex with me! Self-conscious? Something else?
Q. My boyfriend and I are usually very sexual but lately it seems like he doesn't want to have sex with me, we only get to see eachother once or twice a month because of college but it seems like every other time he either wants to have sex with me ...
A. 10 December 2009: If this isn't how your relationship used to be but it is now, then maybe there is a serious reason behind it. The only way you can really tell is to ask him about it. Unless somebody is psychic there's no real way to know what's going on inside his ... (read in full...)
She won't accept that I love her
Q. My girlfriend keeps saying I don't love her. Its getting annoying, because I keep telling her that I do, but she just responds with "nope". What can I say to prove that I love her so she will stop. I love her very much, and I wish she knew I did!...
A. 28 November 2009: Lol. i used to be like this because i was insecure. but i didnt ask it CONSTANTLY. some people just like to hear you say it. some people are just playing hard to get. Tell her u love her, but it's annoying u. ask her why she wont believe u. a ... (read in full...)
I don't trust my girlfriend now she wants to video us having sex...
Q. My Girlfriend has been insisting on to video tape us having sex....I refused. She is kind of mad now. Yeah I asked her why....she said just for memory. I didnt buy that idea. After a couple of months or years I might be on porn sites. pls if u have ...
A. 28 November 2009: I wouldn't do it if i didn't want to. You said no, she shud shut up about it. what if it was the other way around and she REALLY didn't want to do it and you kepton about it? It works both ways. just refuse to do it - especially if it makes u ... (read in full...)
Will my feelings for my boyfriend change after an FFM threesome?
Q. So I was WONDERING, if my boyfriend and I end up having a threesome, with another woman, whats the likely it'll bring us closer? Or I wont feel the same about him?...
A. 28 November 2009: Hmmm. I wouldn't be able to have ANY kind of 3 some. Im very 'if u love each other, each other is enough'. but... it's personal. if u have to wonder, maybe u shudnt do it. it can bring up jealousy issues, and introduce a level of distrust into the ... (read in full...)
My husband is a neat freak and I don't have any motivation to clean!
Q. help!i want to stop this emotional maddnes! my husband is a neat freak and i really just dont care. i really cant find motivation to clean the house. i want to, but when its messed up by him hours later i jsut say screw and dont do it anymore. idk ...
A. 1 November 2009: Then he isn't a neat freak he IS a control freak. I wouldn't do it. Not to be disrespectful but there is no way i would clean because i'm OBLIGATED to as a wife and a mother. no freaking way. don't let it become a pig-sty but if he wants it spic and ... (read in full...)
I slept with my girlfriend and now she's not calling me back! And also.. my male friend hit on me!
Q. Hello fellow agony aunts. I have a problem..actually it's 2 and i was wondering if you guys could help. So last night was Halloween and there was a huge party in my town. Everyone..all my friends and people from other schools were there. And i we...
A. 1 November 2009: I think you need to give your girlfriend awhile, and maybe try to contact her again in a little bit and if not try again tomorrow. Try not to pressure her into calling! But it's nice that you're worried about her.
As for your man friend, i thin... (read in full...)
My husband is a neat freak and I don't have any motivation to clean!
Q. help!i want to stop this emotional maddnes! my husband is a neat freak and i really just dont care. i really cant find motivation to clean the house. i want to, but when its messed up by him hours later i jsut say screw and dont do it anymore. idk ...
A. 1 November 2009: If he's a neat freak - why is he messing up the house? being a true neat freak means you DON'T make a mess. so i can't imagine it bothers him that much if he's the one making the mess. It shouldn't be just your job to clean either, you should both ... (read in full...)
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