I'm worried about the age difference!
Q. My long distance boyfriend is 18, and im 15. Im still nervous about meeting him and how he will react when seeing me, but not as much now. My mom sorta aproved so far. And i have not told my dad because he dont like me even thinking about boys :/ ...
A. 2 September 2012: Why not tell your long distance boyfriend about your father's occupation and let him decide if he wants to risk getting in trouble. If your boyfriend is from another state and you are below the age of consent and the two of you do anything sexual, ... (read in full...)
I'm really mad because I think he was leading me on!
Q. Okay here goes. I have gotten to know a man lately that I first met 2 summers ago. My daughter is involved in theatre and he use to hang around during rehearsals in the hallway and would always come to all the performances. I would always be in ...
A. 2 September 2012: I do remember you asking a question about him before: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-get-the-vibe-that-he-likes-me54.html
If he is indeed, 'very shy' you will have to make your intentions known. You will have to explain to him that you are ... (read in full...)
He doesn't want to see me as often as I want to see him!
Q. I'm 23, my boyfriend is 26. We've been together a little over 2 months. I would like to see him everyday or at least every other day, but he only wants to hang out maybe 2-3 days a week. We've talked about this, and he has said "You're not my life. ...
A. 2 September 2012: It seems like he is only interested in casually dating. You, on the other hand, are looking for a long-term relationship. At this point in life, your goals are incompatible. I think you should take a break from him so you can continue your search ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend didn't invite me for icecream!
Q. recently my bf has moved to my city and our 3years of long distance has ended.we love each other and we were meeting frequently last week.today he went to mall without telling me.he didnt invite me though he knew that next week its not possible to ...
A. 2 September 2012: It is entirely possible that the reason that your relationship worked for three years because you were long distance. Now that you are in closer proximity, you seem to be so frustrated with one another that both of you are immaturely acting out.
... (read in full...)
My instructor touched me when I don't think he needed to, what does it mean?
Q. I'm sorry this is terribly wrong, but I need help... every time I meet him at the corridor or out of college, he will raise his eyebrows twice,lowers his eyelids and smile, there, he did it again today. The way he raises his eyebrows are som...
A. 2 September 2012: I drew all of my conclusions from the information you provided. You didn't say your friend had questions too...you stated you asked her to come along because you didn't feel comfortable working alone with your lecturer.
If you re-read my first... (read in full...)
My starbucks barista crush, does he like me at all or do I notice these signs because I like him?
Q. I have a crush in guy; I'm 18, and he is probably around 20. I know he is in college, I think it may be even his first year. He is a little quieter, but not shy. I hardly see or talk to him and we don't know each other. I occaisonally interact with ...
A. 1 September 2012: You asked a similar, but shorter question a few days ago. http://www.dearcupid.org/question/I-have-a-crush-on-a-Starbucks-barista.html
Maybe he smiles because you tip well. Maybe he smiles because you are a regular customer and he knows you aren... (read in full...)
My instructor touched me when I don't think he needed to, what does it mean?
Q. I'm sorry this is terribly wrong, but I need help... every time I meet him at the corridor or out of college, he will raise his eyebrows twice,lowers his eyelids and smile, there, he did it again today. The way he raises his eyebrows are som...
A. 1 September 2012: He was trying to take your pen.
He sighed because he was frustrated...first, you couldn't meet him alone so you could work without distraction. You brought a friend.
Next, instead of bringing the material you needed to go over with him, y... (read in full...)
My friend is in love with my boyfriend, but she doesn't know we're dating
Q. I have being dating my coworker for 3 months. we've told no one in order to avoid possible problems related to office romance etc. Everything works out fine, except that my best work mate is in love with my boyfriend. She'll always ask him to hang ...
A. 31 August 2012: Tell your boyfriend that he needs to tell your friend that he has a girlfriend. Make sure he tells her.... (read in full...)
Girlfriend's cheating ex is coming over to stay with her and I'm not cool with it!
Q. Please help?! I met this girl a few months ago on a dating website. Anyway I totally fell for her. I'm in love with her. She totally blew me away. However there has been a few situations. Please let me explain. I have on 3 separate occasions c...
A. 31 August 2012: You have asked questions about her here in the last 6 weeks or so, correct?
If you have, it is now time to break up with her. You have given her more than enough chances and she has given you no reason to trust her at every turn.
Please, end t... (read in full...)
Father or not? Should I remain focused on a legal resolution? Or arrange the paternity test through the Courts now?
Q. [Mod note: is there some reason you haven't had a DNA test done to establish paternity? Get that done and most of the problems go away. So please advise as to why you haven't ordered a paternity test.] OP follow up: She just gave birth this month a...
A. 31 August 2012: Demand to have the DNA test done now and visit the lab to have it done. Do NOT give anyone but a professional in a lab a sample of your DNA.
Do not stoop to her level.
Your country may have laws against harrassment. Remind her that her bul... (read in full...)
I feel like he has chewed up my heart and has thrown it into the trash!
Q. Hello all. I have a good guy friend. He has a girlfriend. But this has not stopped him from flirting with me and leading me on. He has treated me like a girlfriend. I continued to hold on because I thought, probably foolishly, that one day he ...
A. 31 August 2012: How has he treated you like a girlfriend?
How long have you known one another?
Where do you interact like at the office or school?
Are you going out of your way to see him, or is he doing the same to see you?
Does he seem to have other fr... (read in full...)
This don't make sense. How is it possible that he contracted chlamydia if we have both been faithful?
Q. i have been in a four year relationship, i have had many pap smear done and been tested for all std's, my man just went to the health department and got tested, and they told him he would have to come back in a couple of days to know the results, ...
A. 31 August 2012: PAP smears are used to detect pre-cancerous cells on the cervix. Cervical cancer is a 'silent' cancer that would often otherwise go undetected (and likely metastasize begore diagnosis) if a woman did not have her yearly exam.
A PAP smear ONLY che... (read in full...)
Why doesn't my mom want me to sleep in the nude?
Q. Dear Agony Aunts, I'm a 14 year old girl. I like to sleep in the nude but my mom doesn't want me to. She never gives me a reason, she just objects. I started sleeping naked over the summer when it's super comfortable. What would she find wrong o...
A. 31 August 2012: If you have brothers or a father...or if you have a blended family...she is concerned for your modesty.
... (read in full...)
Does he fancy me?
Q. I have known this guy for over a year. The first time I met him I was with my partner. Infront of me, while looking at me he said to my partner, "She's lovely isn't she? She's a lovely girl isn't she?". He even kissed me on the lips infront of him. ...
A. 31 August 2012: He has a WIFE and you have a PARTNER.
It sounds like he is an innapropriately affectionate person...nothing more than a friend who kisses his female friends.
Finally, he is not the first man i have seen greet women with a kiss on the lips. Fif... (read in full...)
Can we help determine the sex of a baby by the position we have sex in?
Q. Ok guys . I hope you can help me. My husband wants a little girl. Right know we have 3 boys. My mother in law and her sisters told me to do all the work in bed. My husband should just lay there while im on top. Is that true? Apparently according to ...
A. 31 August 2012: More recent medical studies show there may be a correlation with what you eat and the gender of your baby. Also, the time of the year you get pregnant may also affect the baby's gender.
Position has nothing to do with it. That is an 'old wiv... (read in full...)
Lately I've been getting thicker and lots more discharge than I'd normally get. Is this normal?
Q. Hey Agony Aunts/Uncles, Basically, over the past couple of weeks I've been getting thicker and lots more discharge than I'd normally get. I know I've not got an STI because I haven't had sex since I was last given the all clear for any infectio...
A. 30 August 2012: Please make an appointment and see your doctor. It may be discharge from bacterial vaginosis or possibly a yeast infection.... (read in full...)
Why has my boyfriend changed?
Q. recently my 3 years of long distance has ended and my bf has come to my city.we really love each other.he studies in different college and his college is 1hr from my college. today he came to meet me near my college and said me to come around 3.10...
A. 30 August 2012: He obviously feels like there is still a bit of distance between you. "he shouted at me and said that his coming from SO FAR and m doing this."
You need to stop being selfish and talk to your boyfriend about whatever is upsetting him. He is pu... (read in full...)
B/f and I have been into swinging and I HATE it!
Q. About 4 - 5 years ago, me and my boyfriend of 6 years decided to finally try swinging after playing around with the idea for a while. I was scared out of my mind that I was actually going to go through with it, but chalked it up to newbie nerves. ...
A. 30 August 2012: Leave now.
You don't owe him anything.... (read in full...)
I'm staring at the dissolution of my marriage...
Q. Hey guys its been a while since I last posted. I thought everything would come along well with my wife and I but I'm sadly mistaken. She has really turned against me. It all started just after she left for her 9 week holiday. She started saying...
A. 30 August 2012: Your name is Matthew, right?
Matthew, i've just read back through quite a few of your prior questions from the last 2-3 months. This is what is going on:
You chose to marry a woman that you are not compatible with. She has a strong personali... (read in full...)
Best friend for 10 years, but now we have issues. Is it worth trying to save the friendship?
Q. So this is a friendship question, but I really need advice! To make a long story short, my best friend left for college a couple weeks ago and I am staying at home and going to community college for the time being. This summer she seemed completel...
A. 30 August 2012: Your best friend is making new friends at college. This is a healthy way to transition into adulthood. She still cares about you, but she has moved away from her family and friends to attend college. These first few weeks are incredibly important ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend spends more time on his laptop. I'd like some attention and to spend some time with him but it seems that won't be happening!
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for quite some time and after my mother kicked me out with my one year old, he took me in. He does so well with my daughter and treats her like his own but I feel like ever since I moved in our relationship has ...
A. 30 August 2012: Do you and your boyfriend have any common interests?
Have you asked him to show you what he spends his time doing on the laptop? If he is playing a game, perhaps you could show interest and learn about it and either watch him play or even giv... (read in full...)
Why has my boyfriend changed?
Q. recently my 3 years of long distance has ended and my bf has come to my city.we really love each other.he studies in different college and his college is 1hr from my college. today he came to meet me near my college and said me to come around 3.10...
A. 30 August 2012: Ok, i agree with you then. His behavior is strange.
What i can tell you is this: something is bothering him. He may be stressed out. It might have something to do with you and your relationship, but, it also may not. Please talk to him. Tr... (read in full...)
Our anniversary is on a Thursday but he wants to go out on Saturday. Why?
Q. it's me and my boyfriends 1 year anniversary next month. I mentioned it and he said he'd already planned to take me to a certain restaurant I like so I'm happy that he's put some thought into it. our anniversary falls on a Thursday but he wants to ...
A. 29 August 2012: This is what makes sense to me:
If either of you have work or school on thursday/friday, (but no work or school on saturday/sunday) it is best to go out on saturday because more couples time can be planned...and if you celebrate into the wee hour... (read in full...)
My best friend's girlfriend made him break all contact with me, and he did! I'm hurt and don't know what to do.
Q. I had a Friend who was one of my best friends. In fact he was more like the little brother I never had. About a month or so ago, he got back with his ex, who had cheated on him in the past. He said at the time, he felt like he was making a huge mi...
A. 29 August 2012: Hello again, anonymous.
Your question has been previously addressed here:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/i-lost-my-bestfriend-to-his-girlfriend.html
and here:
http://www.dearcu... (read in full...)
Why has my boyfriend changed?
Q. recently my 3 years of long distance has ended and my bf has come to my city.we really love each other.he studies in different college and his college is 1hr from my college. today he came to meet me near my college and said me to come around 3.10...
A. 29 August 2012: I think he was angry because he felt like you didn't care enough to be on time to meet him and you didn't tell him that you were going to be late.
His anger seems to be about more than you being late by ten minutes. How often do you go to visit... (read in full...)
Text Hi I suffer from an obsessive compulsive disorder which has begun to strain my relationship..
Q. Hi I suffer from an obsessive compulsive disorder which has begun to strain my relationship.. I don't like anyone using my bathroom,I'm very particular about that,and yesterday my boyfriend used it and we go into a huge fight,I can't share stuff li...
A. 29 August 2012: I used to have pretty severe ocd. My first year of college my symptoms escalated along with my anxiety and depression. I was prescribed an antidepressant (generic name is sertraline).
The anti-depressant did little for my depression; however,... (read in full...)
Do you think I overreacted?Should I just stop talking to him?
Q. I'm a girl.I've known this guy for 9 months and we were always good friends.We talked about almost everything - music,piano,our own crushes....etc. I always saw him as my really good friend cos he was such a caring,respectful(he always says sorry to ...
A. 29 August 2012: I told you I was comcerned for your safety because I got a bad vibe from everything you said. You can lol all you want at the thought of this man harming you...but statistics do not lie. 2/3 of all reported rapes happened were committed by someone ... (read in full...)
Our family tree would be a circle since we are distantly related. Is it too weird?
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for nearly 9 months. We have known each other for years and its getting pretty serious. We just found out yesterday that we are 6th cousins 3 times removed, from our understanding. Anyway, our grandfathers are 2nd ...
A. 29 August 2012: Many of us are related...but you and your boyfriend are so many generations removed from one another there are no legal issues that can arise and you are genetically so far removed from one another, any children you could potentially have should be ... (read in full...)
I'm staring at the dissolution of my marriage...
Q. Hey guys its been a while since I last posted. I thought everything would come along well with my wife and I but I'm sadly mistaken. She has really turned against me. It all started just after she left for her 9 week holiday. She started saying...
A. 29 August 2012: I'm sorry for the stress you are under. It seems almost like she is racist and after spending time with her family has decided to move back with them.
You need to save that nasty message she sent you as well as all correspondences between ... (read in full...)
I destroyed his trust and now he is very jealous and controlling.
Q. hey so i am in a very promising relationship with my boyfriend we have know each other for 10 years and are very smitten and in love , but sometimes he gets really jelous if other boys like me or even talk to me he has rules like i cant wear short ...
A. 29 August 2012: Is he a 'man' or is he a child? He is acting like a child.
He is being controlling.
He is blaming you for being held down and forcibly kissed by another guy. (what if you had been raped? Would he blame you for that as well?!)
Since... (read in full...)
I watched my ex friend with benefits beat his wife! Why would he do this?
Q. I found myself in a situation I never been in a few days ago. Someone I had a fwb relationship for a few months and I stopped it last month came to my house. We remain friends still but I know that this maybe an issue now. He showed up at my house ...
A. 25 August 2012: My question to you: why didn't you attempt to intervene, try to calm him down, or call the cops? I hate to be blunt, but do you use the same drugs that he and his family use? I can't see any other possible reason for you to just sit there and be ... (read in full...)
The honeymoon phase is over and I'm feeling distant - what do I do now?
Q. Lately, I've been feeling more distant from my boyfriend, and I'm not really sure why. Maybe you folks can give me some advice or things to think about. I first noticed it when my sex drive jumped off a cliff - historically, he and I have gotten b...
A. 25 August 2012: Have you recently begun taking a contraceptive pill or anti-depressant medication? These medications are known to decrease libido.... (read in full...)
Text I need help becoming a better person
Q. I need help becoming a better person. My mom has progressive MS and my brother is autistic and at home. And I rarely take them out anywhere or do stuff for them. I just never feel like it lately. Writing this makes me cringe, but it's true. For a...
A. 24 August 2012: It is in your best interest to see a doctor. You need a physical including bloodwork. Also, you should visit your university's counseling center. They can provide you with support to help you through your last year.... (read in full...)
My social anxiety and loneliness is killing me... Any advice?
Q. I just feel so alone right now. So tired of seeing happy couples everywhere I go. I feel like all I need right now is a girlfriend who I can share my life with. Sure this reeks of desperation but I can't hide the truth. It seems like all the ta...
A. 24 August 2012: There has to be someone like you nearby. Someone who has had similar struggles with social anxiety and despair. If you can find someone who is willing to overlook your quirks because they share them with you then you will make a friend and you can ... (read in full...)
Do you think I overreacted?Should I just stop talking to him?
Q. I'm a girl.I've known this guy for 9 months and we were always good friends.We talked about almost everything - music,piano,our own crushes....etc. I always saw him as my really good friend cos he was such a caring,respectful(he always says sorry to ...
A. 24 August 2012: If you have ever told this man or anyone else that you see him as your "soul mate" everyone is going to think that you like him as more than friends. A soul mate is a once in a lifetime partner, they are the person you feel most compatible with on ... (read in full...)
Do I stay and wait for b/f to grow up? Or realize its over and hit the road?
Q. Hello Agonies. My boyfriend and i have been in a 3yr and 6mo. on and off relationship. Throughout this relationship he has cheated multiples of times, constantly lies and mistreats me, no communication whatsoever, doesn't try to make things right ...
A. 24 August 2012: This is not a relationship: "Throughout this relationship he has cheated multiples of times, constantly lies and mistreats me, no communication whatsoever, doesn't try to make things right anymore, disrespects me, doesn't want to spend time with me ... (read in full...)
Handcuffs and restraints from Ann Summers: will they fit my bigger wrists?
Q. Hey, i need some answers from people who have used them, please.... I want to buy some handcuffs from ann summers, just the normal fluffy ones, and possibly some restraints. However, i do not have small wrists, they are more like a mans wrists (b...
A. 23 August 2012: Why not call the company and ask? If the handcuff specifications are not on the website, a representative should have the information available.
You may also try calling some adult stores in your area. If they hve the item available, they can... (read in full...)
His feelings are "complicated," and I'm heartbroken. What should I do?
Q. His feelings are "complicated," and I'm heartbroken. What should I do? I dated an older guy for 6 months. I'm 38; he's 60. He told me we were made for each other and he didn’t know sex could be as special as it was with me. He sent sweet text ...
A. 21 August 2012: He is from a different time. You have not been played. He has not broken up with you. I have a feeling that you could continue to have something together as long as you are willing to take things slowly for awhile.
He is essentially warning ... (read in full...)
Ex is going religious for the wrong reasons
Q. Alright folks, this dabbles in a very touchy subject - religion. Steer clear if you take offense easily! Lets play some catch-up for a second. Here's the VHS fast-forward version. GF and I break up. GF gets new boytoy. GF realizes new boytoy is ab...
A. 21 August 2012: This quote says it all. "I've invested a lot of time and money into keeping this girl happy even from a distance"
Take what is left of your pride, your money, and your extra time and do something with it other than putting all your focus on this ... (read in full...)
I am concerned about the young man living in the house with my Cortland.
Q. I am 60 dating a retired 54 year old woman.she has a 22 yo son and his best friend age 22 year old friend living in the same house. I could accept her son in our relation but I am concerned about the male friend living in the same house in terms of ...
A. 21 August 2012: Are you certain the son and his friend are only best friends?
Under what circumstances did the son's friend come to live in the house? If she has known him since he was a boy it is extremely likely she views her son's friend as another son!
... (read in full...)
How do I get myself out of this vicious circle? I’ve become my mother and I don’t want to be
Q. I need some advice. I know this may at first sound like a joke question but it’s not. I’m worried I’ve turned in to my mother and I don’t like it one bit. I need help. First some background information. I’m 23 and I’m in a longer term rela...
A. 21 August 2012: If you have not always had this anger, you may want to see a medical doctor to have blood work done. Hormone imbalances (thyroid, estrogen, testosterone especially) can cause someone to experience episodes of sudden rage. My mother had an extreme ... (read in full...)
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