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*andid Cally

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Friendships, like all relationships, begin when like-minded people meet on common ground.

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Career vs Love - what comes first?

Q.   What's more important? • a career that pays $10k more than you currently earn... With greater responsibility and pressure. Or... • being in a loving relationship, building your own home and having a future with somebody that loves you? Your wag...

A.   23 November 2011: I'm currently in a loving relationship. Neither of us would give that up for an extra $10K per year even though that would almost double our current yearly income.... (read in full...)

Am I too heavy to be a stripper?

Q.   Hello. I know this is a bit off topic but I was recently contemplating becoming an exotic dancer/stripper to make some extra cash but wanted some advice as to what a dancer should ideally look like. I workout about 3x a week running 30 minutes to 1 ...

A.   21 November 2011: Being a stripper or dancer is about far more than weight. Men want to view confident, proportional, sexy women who have a nice complexion and a knack for dancing. If you are a fit and healthy 140 lbs. at 5'6" you aren't necessarily too heavy. ... (read in full...)

Penis is too visible. How do I wear my underwear appropriately?

Q.   bit of a personal question like but here goes, my penis is about 3-4 inches when flacid and about 7-8 inches erect but my problem is when flacid my penis sticks straight out like a perfect 'L' against my abdomen, and when erect it is almost touching ...

A.   19 November 2011: Boxer briefs or briefs should help. If you are concerned, make an appointment to see your doctor to make sure everything is developing normally.... (read in full...)

Braces! rubberbands! I feel so ugly. All my photos next year will be ruined. And I'm a dancer. What can I do to get through this?

Q.   I'm 16 years old, and in my 3rd year of high school. I recently just got braces on, not to straighten my teeth (they were already straight), but, to fix my bite. I have to wear rubberbands and all of that. I can't stand to even look at myself anym...

A.   19 November 2011: The only way these things will be ruined by your braces is if YOU LET THEM BE RUINED. I not only had braces and rubberbands my senior year (and for a few years before too), I also had something called a Herbst Appliance. Why not try to have ... (read in full...)

I really liked him, but after kissing him my attraction and everything towards him has gone! How?

Q.   Am I being silly here, I met this guy about three weeks ago and was attracted straight away, we had small talk whenever we saw each other but I didn't really think he liked me. Well last saturday I decided to just talk to him more than small talk ...

A.   17 November 2011: Ask yourself this: even if he was a good kisser would you feel any differently or did things just feel awkward?... (read in full...)

Boyfriend will only sleep on the couch, not with me

Q.   please help my boyfriend and i have been together for 9 months now been staying together for the past 3 months, in the past month or so he has stopped sleeping in the bed with me and will only sleep on the couch. there has been a few times whe...

A.   16 November 2011: Do you snore? Do you talk, make noise or thrash around in your sleep? Could you be overly flatulent once asleep? (I've slept on the couch before to escape the smells that emanate from my fiancé after he's eaten certain foods :-/ ) Do yo... (read in full...)

He never listened and now his family and friends have run out of way to say and how to support him!

Q.   Once upon a time a man and woman meet, man and woman became good friends. The man is married to his first love they have three children, but the man starts to fall in love with his friend, and vice versa, though for a while nither says it and they ...

A.   16 November 2011: She should try to stay out of it especially if the man is 5-10+ years older. She will end up hurt if she tries to help. His wife still has a hold on him. You can see that by looking at how angry and irrational she makes him.... (read in full...)

My best friend tried to have sex with me, but I don't want to! What do I do, who do I tell?

Q.   Hi I'm 16 and I have a guy friend who I joke with a call my best friend. Well he knows me better than other people and we used to be close till he got a girlfriend who hates that I'm his "best friend". Last year december me and my best friend (bf) ...

A.   16 November 2011: Do not place yourself in a situation alone with him ever again. Tell his girlfriend. Tell a parent or a school counselor. Tell someone who cares about you. Tell that idiot boy that the bet was NOT serious and buying sushi for someone is ... (read in full...)

My best friend tried to have sex with me, but I don't want to! What do I do, who do I tell?

Q.   Hi I'm 16 and I have a guy friend who I joke with a call my best friend. Well he knows me better than other people and we used to be close till he got a girlfriend who hates that I'm his "best friend". Last year december me and my best friend (bf) ...

A.   16 November 2011: Do not place yourself in a situation alone with him ever again. Tell his girlfriend. Tell a parent or a school counselor. Tell someone who cares about you. Tell that idiot boy that the bet was NOT serious and buying sushi for someone is ... (read in full...)

I saw his father in the bathroom and now I'm mortified!!

Q.   I am completely mortified. I was going to my boyfriends house, he greeted me and it just so happened that I really needed to pee. Well he has a bathroom right next to the front entrance, a little one. The door wasn't closed and it was dark so I ...

A.   16 November 2011: He is probably as mortified as you are. Take a few deep breaths. Try to calm yourself. You already apologized profusely. Just pretend it never happened. Either you will eventually forget it ever happened, or it will be an awkward funny... (read in full...)

When single he masturbated 2-3 times a day, but now that he is with me sex is rare! Why?

Q.   My Boyfriend suffers from depression and he pretty much has for most of his life so he says. He is now seeing a dr. to help him out with this but my question is before we dated he told me he was an excessive mastubator so his sex drive always seems ...

A.   16 November 2011: Masturbation can be something a person does to temporarily increase the endorphins in the brain to temporarily alleviate the symptoms of depression. If he is seeing a doctor and especially if he is currently taking medication for depression, he may ... (read in full...)

Is surgery worth loss of sensitivity?

Q.   I'm not talking about implants! I know most men are against implants but are for other surgeries(reductions, lifts, nipple reductions etc) From your point of view, do you think better looking breasts are worth the loss of sensitivity? ...

A.   16 November 2011: I am a bit confused. Your question is about female sensitivity vs breast appearance. Most of the respondents will be females sharing their own personal opinions and experiences with you. Most men will not reply because the majority of them don't ... (read in full...)

She said to me during sex "would you just finish" after only 10 minutes! I always thought lasting longer was better....

Q.   hi their. I have confidance issues when it comes to how long i last during sex. I always please my partner though oral and hands before sex as she doesnt orgasm through intercourse. Once she had cum we moved on to the sex. I was prolonging cumming ...

A.   16 November 2011: If she has already orgasmed through foreplay, and cannot orgasm through intercourse, prolonging intercourse just to seem 'manly' is kind of selfish. After a woman orgasms, she will produce less natural lubricant. Additionally, she may bec... (read in full...)

Does she not want me to succeed? Any suggestions to get her back too, if you can?

Q.   Hey guys I am 19 years old ,and I had been in a relationship for a little over a year until recently. She broke up with me a couple of days back cold heartedly. Info:she has been my friend since childhood. Her and my parents get along pretty wel...

A.   16 November 2011: Do not let the actions of a cruel heartless woman influence the whole of your future! Do not try to win her back. Use the time to lay the foundation for your future. ... (read in full...)

He'd rather search the internet than give me a text or a call!

Q.   I'm really confused and a but hurt. I just started dating again after a painful breakup and it seems every guy I date is not serious at all. I finally hit it off with "John ". He texted or called me everyday for 3 weeks while he was out of town on ...

A.   16 November 2011: Did you get really close to having sex, or were you actually having sex before you exclaimed you just couldn't do it? Either way, just so you know for future encounters...saying you just can't do it is pretty much telling a guy you just aren't that ... (read in full...)

Can the contraceptive pill cause an upset stomach?

Q.   I've been on the birth control pill for two and a half months, the first month I was completely fine but after my first period I generally had an upset stomach on-going for a month. I'm curious to whether this could be due to the pill before I go ...

A.   16 November 2011: You need to bring this up with your doctor. There is a possibility that it has nothing to do with your birth control. You may have developed a food intolerance, or there may be a physical change in your body that is causing your problem.... (read in full...)

Is surgery worth loss of sensitivity?

Q.   I'm not talking about implants! I know most men are against implants but are for other surgeries(reductions, lifts, nipple reductions etc) From your point of view, do you think better looking breasts are worth the loss of sensitivity? ...

A.   16 November 2011: No, I don't share your sentiment. As much as I would like to have breasts that are proportional to the rest of me (I'm pear-shaped and still fit in the first bras that were purchased for me as a 9 or 10 year old child), I just can't fathom n... (read in full...)

Why is sex hurting now?

Q.   I'm a worried seventeen year old and need some advice. I'm scared to whom I should turn to. My situation; I've been have sex for my boyfriend for the last ten months and just the last couple weeks, I feel like he has been hitting the top of my ...

A.   14 November 2011: Perhaps you aren't producing as much natural lubricant as you have been previously? This could cause the discomfort you are describing, and is easily fixed by purchasing and using a lubricant like ky jelly or astroglide or something similar.... (read in full...)

Sex while music is playing?

Q.   Hello everyone, just after a few personal opinions here! Do you think it's a good idea to have sex for the first time while music's playing in the background or can that be a distraction from (or to) your partner? I'm thinking classical music, ...

A.   13 November 2011: It will depend entirely on whether he enjoys classical music. ... (read in full...)

Why did this special connection end?

Q.   Hi guys, i'm so confused. And asking you guys on the internet is the last resort I have to get some advice and clear my mind. Anyways, I've been in a FWB relationship with this guys for about 2 months. We started off by hooking up when we were bot...

A.   13 November 2011: You two need to clarify exactly where you stand on your relationship and what if any future you see together.... (read in full...)

Do girls always find nude art in a guy's place offensive?

Q.   Ok, I studied film in college and since then have gotten interested in still photography as well, especially photographers like Howard Schatz, Patrick Demarchelier, Andreas H. Bitesnich, and Herb Ritts. Nudes happen to be one of the subject-matter ...

A.   13 November 2011: It is possible that girls you bring over assume the photos are of other girls you have had a relationship with. It could also be that most people do not display images with nude female subjects in a prominent position in a dwelling. It pr... (read in full...)

Women seem to use me for sex, but I want a relationship

Q.   Girls always tell me that I'm attractive, funny and smart -- I'm in university doing chemistry/physics, but I always feel so stupid whenever I get involved with a girl. I really liked this girl, and I slept with her a few times a few weeks ago. I...

A.   12 November 2011: It is called charisma. You apparently have it. I think you need to wait longer to have sex with girls you like. If they lose interest because you won't sleep with them, then they were only after sex in the first place.... (read in full...)

The kiss was a step too far

Q.   This is a little embarrassing to talk about. Well, my roommate and I had started experimenting with each other earlier in the year, and now we do quite a bit of stuff on more of a regular basis. Anyway, recently while we were messing around, ...

A.   12 November 2011: You're question is perfectly acceptable here. :-) You feel uncomfortable because the kiss *did* change things. Whether you are ready to admit it or not you began to feel something more for him than just a roommate with benefits relation... (read in full...)

My husband thinks I'm cheating on him but I'm not!

Q.   Around 4 clock in the morning my husband gets off of work. He decided to take the trash out this morning at that time. A single sheet of blank loose leaf paper was in front of our door when he went, Now he didn't think much of it until when he came ...

A.   11 November 2011: It seems like you may live in a community containing people who are not at all accepting of interracial relationships. Devils food and white cake mix? A condom? It seems like some sick twisted person or group of people is/are messing with you. ... (read in full...)

He said I "owe" him sex!!! Should I feel bad?

Q.   On another note, I broke up with my ex-boyfriend last week after him controlling me for over 2 years. A week before I had began getting closer to my guy friend but I hadn't noticed it 'till I broke up with my boyfriend. It's been a week since my ...

A.   11 November 2011: If he waited for you to have sex with him, he can simply wait a bit longer for someone else to come along and oblige him.... (read in full...)

I've become the jealous snooping boyfriend! How can we work through this?

Q.   I had been with my girlfriend for 15 years. She had gone to college for 6 years in order to, "get the job of her dreams."During the last 3 years of our relationship she became addicted to world of Warcraft and there was no sign of her seriously ...

A.   11 November 2011: You have to decide whether you are reluctant to end the relationship because you both still love each other, or if you two are only still together because of the familiarity of the relationship and each other due to the length of time you've been ... (read in full...)

Can my boyfriend have an STD he doesn't know about, and transmit it through oral sex?

Q.   Although my boyfriend's never been officially tested for STDs, he's pretty sure he's clear. From what I know, he hasn't had many previous sexual partners (although he didn't always use condoms because his then girlfriends were on birth control, and ...

A.   8 November 2011: Instead of worrying about what you may or may not catch, how about both of you go to a local clinic and have the full battery of blood tests performed so you can know your std status? Yes, there are types of std's like certain strains of hpv that... (read in full...)

Can my boyfriend have an STD he doesn't know about, and transmit it through oral sex?

Q.   Although my boyfriend's never been officially tested for STDs, he's pretty sure he's clear. From what I know, he hasn't had many previous sexual partners (although he didn't always use condoms because his then girlfriends were on birth control, and ...

A.   8 November 2011: Instead of worrying about what you may or may not catch, how about both of you go to a local clinic and have the full battery of blood tests performed so you can know your std status? Yes, there are types of std's like certain strains of hpv that... (read in full...)

My fiance is beginning to feel unattractive because I don't want sex often, is there something wrong with me?

Q.   I'm a 22 year old college student and I never want sex. I have a wonderful fiance who is starting to feel unattractive because of how little I want/need sex. :( When we do have sex, it's amazing, so I'm thinking the issue is on my part. Is there ...

A.   8 November 2011: If you are taking any medications regularly (including a contraceptive pill), your limited libido may be a side effect of the medication.... (read in full...)

How can I stop worrying about money so much?

Q.   My family doesn't have much money. We have enough just for the basic needs. I can't help but feel overwhelmingly jealous when I see that other people who are no better or smarter than me in any way have so much more than I do. I keep thinking ab...

A.   8 November 2011: If my household can stretch $1,300 per month and still have at least $200 to put aside for emergencies, you can find a way to save money for luxuries. The trick is living frugally. Using coupons, buying food that is in season, walking or ridin... (read in full...)

Why does this happen? My whole body tightens up and shakes when I go to meet a guy?

Q.   im a gay guy who is 19 years old and i have no problem talking to people and making friends i am one of the most outgoing people you will ever meet, im easy to get along with and im around people 24/7. i have no issues texting guys or talking to ...

A.   7 November 2011: It sounds like anxiety or even a panic attack. You may want to research psychiatrists in your area and make an appointment to see one who is qualified to assist you with the unique issues and anxiety you are experiencing as a gay male who is s... (read in full...)

My in-laws have my children and now my alcoholic husband is dead they wont let them come back to me

Q.   hi i have two children, 13 and 7 years old. i live seperately and my children live with my father in law, and my husband died 2 year ago. now i want back my children but my mother in law is not agreeing ,she thinking i am responsible for my husbands ...

A.   7 November 2011: If you want you children returned to you, you must be clean and sober, have means (income) to support all 3 of you and have a clean and safe home environment where all 3 of you can live. If you meet these requirements, you should speak with a l... (read in full...)

Am I a normal female?

Q.   am i a normal female?please help .there is this one time i was making love with my boyfriend and lots of fluids came from me.i mean it was like water was pouring from a tap of water.this has never happened and i am freaking out.he says am normal and ...

A.   7 November 2011: Please calm down. While it isn't normal, it is NOT abnormal either. The slang term for what happened is called 'squirting'. There are many men, including your boyfriend, who especially enjoy a woman who has this unique reaction during sex. If ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend says she's only been with 2 men, but I don't believe her. Am I right?

Q.   I dont know what to do. I have been with my girlfriend for the last 5 years, but I cant trust her. I am 25 and she is 24. She has told me that she has had two boyfriends before me who she had sex with, but I have heard that she has had more. I think ...

A.   7 November 2011: Oh, sweetie, you have so much to learn about women! If you feel like you need to live and experience a few more before you settle down, you need to do the manly thing and let this girl go before you hurt her any more than you already have. A few... (read in full...)

My brother's fiancée is cheating, do I show him the proof or not?

Q.   Hi I am in a bit of a dilemma, I was invited by a friend onto a dating site called Badoo. So I joined to see what it was as I had no idea, and I came across a profile for my borther's Fience (definitely her as it was her picture) stating that she is ...

A.   7 November 2011: In this day and age, people will copy and save photos of attractive women to their computers and set up dating profiles to chat with men online with the sole purpose to build up trust and later scam them out of their money. Are you absolute... (read in full...)

Is it possible to keep weight on your butt and breasts but not your face?

Q.   For the last 4 years, I have been in LDR and we meet after every three months or sometimes six months. Otherwise we keep it going through phone. There is 400 miles distance between us. When recently I visited her, after eight months, she gained s...

A.   7 November 2011: You need to ask her if she has changed her diet since you two last met. If the weight gain occurred without a change in her diet, caloric intake, or exercise habits it can be a symptom of a medical problem and she needs to see her doctor ... (read in full...)

How can I cover a bruise on my face?

Q.   I have a bruise on my face and i am worried as i have to go out on Wednesday and i don't want people to notice it. i have very short hair so it might be hard to hide it that way. i could put make up on it but i'm not sure if it would still be ...

A.   7 November 2011: It will depend on a few factors: the location of the bruise, how much swelling the bruise is causing, and whether or not you have fair skin. I've had a few bruises on my face in the past. They were caused by general clumsiness, stupidit... (read in full...)

How do I tell my lesbian girlfriend to take it easy on me during sex without telling her I was a virgin before her?

Q.   Girlfriend is on a quest to sexually open me up. She doesn't like to use lube although she can be real rough during sex. I really really love her and she says she loves me....we've been together two years n being intimate for a yr and a half. We ...

A.   4 November 2011: I'm sure she will be able to smell the lube and she'll know you've put some on. Why can't you just explain to her that she was your first? Why doesn't she respect your wishes regarding your body when it comes to sexual intimacy? Doesn't ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to need to pee after sex?

Q.   After I have sex or any other sexual things, I have an urge to pee. I was just wondering, is this normal or common for women to do?...

A.   3 November 2011: Chigirl is spot on. It is a completely natural reflex that occurs to cleanse a woman's urethra of any naturally occurring vaginal bacteria and fungi that may have entered during the act of sexual intercourse (the urethra and vagina are in the same ... (read in full...)

Was boyfriend posing as someone else?

Q.   Today i logged into hotmail on my boyfriends ipad and another person was logged on. The profile was just started. I think November 1st. I had no time to look cuz he was asking what i was looking at. I said nothing but he knew it was something. he ...

A.   3 November 2011: It does seem like your guy has been posing as another person (or possibly people) online in order to receive images. It is possible he is posing as a female. Email addresses CAN end in uk. Uk means United Kingdom and a person with a .uk email ad... (read in full...)

I want to clear my conscience and tell the boyfriend of the girl I slept with what I did. Should I do this?

Q.   Hello all I did something very bad, and I'm quite ashamed of it I had sex with a girl who has a boyfriend. Sure, that happens all the time, but this girl...well...I work with her boyfriend, and I also work with her mum. idiot? yep i kn...

A.   3 November 2011: You do realize what you want to do has no benefits at all to anyone involved (you don't plan on dating the girl, you aren't now nor do you plan on having a friendship with her boyfriend) and it could cost you your job and the respect of someone you ... (read in full...)

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