My boyfriend is dirty and won't take a shower for me, how can I get him to?
Q. My Boyfriend does not like to keep himself hygienically clean. He is almost a 40 year old man. His average is a shower every three days. He thinks that he is clean. It gets hard to be intimate due to his lack of cleanliness; it affects my sex life ...
A. 15 November 2012: Your boyfriend's post is here: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/girlfriend-and-i-have-a-fight-over-why.html... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is dirty and won't take a shower for me, how can I get him to?
Q. My Boyfriend does not like to keep himself hygienically clean. He is almost a 40 year old man. His average is a shower every three days. He thinks that he is clean. It gets hard to be intimate due to his lack of cleanliness; it affects my sex life ...
A. 14 November 2012: Warning: if you follow this link it has foul language and raunchy humor. Your boyfriend should read it...especially #4
http://www.cracked.com/blog/5-things-men-do-to-ruin-their-own-sex-lives/... (read in full...)
Should I tell him or just carry on and get rid of it?
Q. So ive only been intimate with one man for the last 3 months, last month my period came oct. 15 until oc 20. We had sex oct. 21. And after that we text one time until we hung out again but i was drunk n messed things up between us, he said he would ...
A. 14 November 2012: If you are going to use a patch or pill as your primary form of birth control, you must understand how to use it properly to avoid becoming pregnant. You must also understand the scenarios where it cannot prevent pregnancy.
The first day of your ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him or just carry on and get rid of it?
Q. So ive only been intimate with one man for the last 3 months, last month my period came oct. 15 until oc 20. We had sex oct. 21. And after that we text one time until we hung out again but i was drunk n messed things up between us, he said he would ...
A. 13 November 2012: Some periods are later than others...especially if you start or stop birth control.
My periods are 28 days, but last month I had a 31 day cycle.
Have you had a positive pregnancy test? ... (read in full...)
She's not interested in "shrooming" with me...
Q. I really love her, we've been together for 9 months as of the other day. I ask that anyone who reads this, do so with an open mind and not cast judgement or speak against "drugs", assert that I have a problem or anything likewise. Things were really ...
A. 13 November 2012: Just because it has been a beautiful experience for you does not mean that she will have the same experience. I've taken psychedelics numerous times in my life...nothing has ever been more terrifying for me than a shroom trip.
Everyone reacts t... (read in full...)
Is there anyway a doctor could diagnose me without having to touch me down there?
Q. hi all, this is going to be a weird/awkward/gross question... but, I don't know where else to ask. I vaguely remember this... when I was probably 11 or so, I found a sort of sex toy or maybe a ring thing that would go around the guy and it vibra...
A. 13 November 2012: You are 18. If you are planning on becomming sexually active you need to have your first pap smear anyway.
As for discharge...it varies depending on your body and the time in your cycle. Some women are prone to developing either bacteria... (read in full...)
How to get my wife in a thong
Q. Trying to get my wife to wear anything even a little sexy to bed. Nothing elaborate- would be thrilled for 5 min in a thong or anything beside cotton boring briefs. Been married 15 years- she is beautiful. Don't feel like this should be asking...
A. 12 November 2012: My father used to call thongs 'butt floss' and then laugh.
I thought he was just trying to be funny until I bought and wore my first thong back in high school. It was incredibly uncomfortable and I felt like I had a wedgie constantly. It was s... (read in full...)
Watching Pornography in a relationship. Is it unfair or fun?
Q. Hi, i want to ask this question and i want your opinions. I hate my boyfriends watching porn when they are having a relationship with me, what i wanted to know was is there such thing as a man who is not that fussed by it? Who would just take it or ...
A. 12 November 2012: As long as my fiance and I have sex regularly, I am not at all fussed with him watching porn. Please keep in mind that I am not okay with him watching or paying live cam girls...this crosses a line in my mind...i'm okay with him watching ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend proposed! During sex... Thoughts?
Q. my boyfriend proposed to me during sex. he called it making love and he asked me to marry him while his **** was inside me. i said yes but thought the whole time if he was joking and how could he ever think that this was a cool idea of proposin...
A. 12 November 2012: This was part of the plot for a recent episode of 'The Big Bang Theory.' Leonard proposed to Penny while they were in bed making love.
Anyway, I do think he owes you a real formal, down on one knee proposal.... (read in full...)
I have big dreams about what I want to do and where I want to go to college but I need advice!
Q. Hello, everyone, I am sixteen years old and I have a 4.8 GPA at my school. My teacher told me that if I keep my GPA up I will be able to go pretty much anywhere college wise, which is great. I'd really love to study abroad. I do not really wanna...
A. 12 November 2012: Psychology and the arts go well together. There is a field of counseling devoted to exploring healing and expression through art and music. Psychology is an easier major than microbiology or chemistry. Psychology is more memorization and ... (read in full...)
Should I stay with a violent husband for the sake of the children?
Q. My husband has violent outbursts about 3 -4 times a year. Something small will usually set him off, but everyone in the family knows to run for cover. I have three children (8,11,13) who have witnessed him exploding in a rage. The last time it ...
A. 12 November 2012: My parents were never directly violent with each other; however, I've grown up believing it is perfectly acceptable to aggressively attack a wall with a fist or a sledgehammer out of rage. All of my sibilings feel the same way.
My father used to ... (read in full...)
I wanted to treat him better, but now he's the one giving the silent treatment.
Q. Hi, Really quick and to the point (need to study for midterms ^^") When several months ago, whenever me and my boyfriend had an argument I would give him the silent treatment. It's just who I am and how I deal with things. He would feel te...
A. 9 November 2012: It seems like he may be the kind of guy who doesn't want to hear about how something has made you feel...instead he needs to think about what he did that upset you (whatever he did that caused you to give him the silent treatment) which then causes ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend's mom criticizes my natural/healthy lifestyle. Should I stand my ground? If so, how do I do it respectfully and graciously?
Q. Hello, Please excuse me in advance for the length of this message. I am in a 4 year relationship. I am 24 and my boyfriend is 29. We currently live separately, each with our parents. We plan to move in together as soon as I finish university t...
A. 8 November 2012: I'm not going to jump into the natural vs pharmaceutical debate.
If your boyfriend feels like he is getting sick on an almost weekly basis, he likely has allergies to something in his environment. Allergies are caused by an overactive immune s... (read in full...)
Intense performance anxiety is taking over and affecting my relationships.
Q. I am struggling with some sort of sexual performance anxiety. I am 17 years old, and lost my virginity on my 17th birthday to my current girlfriend. Since age 13 I've had anxiety about sexual things, feeling that I needed to be sexually active in o...
A. 8 November 2012: Have sex with music playing...preferably music with a good beat, positive vibes, and no lyrics that will bring you down or make you think.
Seriously, music has been the only way I have been able to derail my thoughts and just simply lose myself i... (read in full...)
Housemate politics
Q. Me and my housemate are about to fall out. Basically - our front door lock broke and 3 out of 5 housemates got new keys for the new lock. 2 of us didn't. We had got back door keys cut before this (foresight) for ourselves just in case. So we weren...
A. 8 November 2012: It isn't fair to ask them to pay for your keys after you had them made especially because you have a key to the back door.
It would have been best to ask the landlord for a key, or to ask your roommates about splitting the cost of the keys BEF... (read in full...)
To the people who were bullied and neglected while growing up. How did you cope with it and get past it?
Q. I was neglected during my primary schooling by my teachers, classmates and parents. the same thing happened in high school except that physical and verbal bullying were added. I told about what was happening in primary school and the teacher took...
A. 8 November 2012: What do you want to do with your life?
The only person I know who has seemingly overcome (at least outwardly) the effects of years of bullying decided to focus his intelligence and dedicate himself to his studies with the sole goal of leaving ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend used to idolise his friend's body and she was skinny, yet he doesn't want me to get too thin! What is going on here?
Q. I am confused about the messages that my bf is sending me with his comments about weight. I recently lost 30 pounds, putting me now around 160 pounds. My bf is very proud of me, and seems to enjoy the changes in my body. I do too! I'm very excited ...
A. 8 November 2012: I am 5'9" and I've had an eating disorder for more than half of my life. Recently, I donated a bunch of my old clothing that hasn't fit for about 5 years because i've gained weight. Right now, I am a 'healthy' weight for my height. These clothes ... (read in full...)
Help! Penis problem!
Q. Hi everyone, This isn't a relationship question, more sexual health. I few days ago I was taking a bath, went to pull my foreskin back to wash and there was a huge build up of smegma and it smelt pretty awful. A few days prior to that, whilst m...
A. 7 November 2012: If it is different than what you've experienced in the past then it isn't normal and it is time to see a doctor. It could be many things; however, no one but a medical professional can diagnose and treat you.
Many conditions have overlapp... (read in full...)
Question about Venlafaxine (Effexor)
Q. Venlafaxine hydrochloride is in the phenethylamine class of modern chemicals, which includes amphetamine, methylenedioxymethamphetamine (MDMA), and methamphetamine. This chemical structure likely lends to its activating properties; however, some ...
A. 6 November 2012: While it is a phenethylamine (has to do with the molecular structure), it is NOT the same as meth, MDMA, or other amphetamines because it is not an amphetamine...effexor has a different molecular structure than addictive phenethylamines ... (read in full...)
I wish to do Musical Theatre but am afraid that I will not get accepted!
Q. Dear cupid, before I go into my question I wish to explain my situation as best as I can. I go to a creative arts school for creative writing. I have been writing for six to seven years, right. Writing is ONE of the passions of mine that I have been ...
A. 4 November 2012: You need to record yourself dancing, acting, and singing then review the recording. While reviewing the recording, you need to focus on what you could change about your routine to make it better.
If you cannot sing in the correct key, musical ... (read in full...)
What does a wink from a married man mean? Friendly or flirtatious?
Q. What does a wink from a married man mean? While I was at a friend's house, her (friendly) husband winked at me while I was leaving. We were talking at the door and he winked. Previous to that, I always felt he would be happy to bump into me in ...
A. 2 November 2012: A wink can be a sign that he was joking about something.
A wink could also be an involuntary reaction to a foreign particle in one's eye, or a facial tic caused by nervousness, lack of sleep, or too much caffeine.
I'm sure he was nervous. Wi... (read in full...)
Advice needed... Is my brother for real???
Q. So my brother has been a drug user for 8 years. He also does pot/weed. He has been cheating on his wife since they were dating but his wife still married him. His wife gorges on alcohol and is frequent at bars. They have a 4 year old daughter. M...
A. 2 November 2012: Not everyone who us married has a monogamous relationship. It is very possible that your brother and his wife have some kind of agreement regarding their sex life and having other partners. (he can kiss another woman on the lips in front of his ... (read in full...)
My fiance said her ex was a better lover.
Q. Hello everyone, sorry for the long post,this is the first time asking a question, although I have been reading many posts here trying to come to terms with something that happened to me recently. I have just recently come back from Europe where I a...
A. 31 October 2012: You are her best...she tried to express that the next morning.
Someone can be great in bed and not be a great lover. He may have a bigger penis, but, she never connected with him emotionally in the same way she has with you. Deeper feelings... (read in full...)
Boyfriend won't do the things I need to make me climax. What should I do?
Q. The only way I can cum is with penetration and breast stimulation at the same time. Time and time I've asked him to touch me and to suck on me, but my boyfriend of 9 years won't do it for more than ten seconds. He gets to cum, but I never can be...
A. 30 October 2012: If you have coarse, long and/or dark nipple hair (hair growing on or around your areola) you may want to consider removing it. This is something that I've seen mentioned before that can be a major turnoff for some men, but the guy is too afraid to ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend ABANDONED ME far from home today!
Q. THIS IS A LONG ONE BUT PLEASE READ ALL OF IT AND LET ME KNOW WHAT YOU THINK: First of all, we have been together for 3 years. We're both 22 years old. We just moved in together a few months ago. We're both going to the same college full time. ...
A. 30 October 2012: Depending on your lease, you may be able to break it without incurring a loss. If both of you are on the lease, you may be able remove yourself from the lease, without a penalty because the lease would still be in your boyfriend's name. If you ... (read in full...)
Could my breasts get larger without the side effects of the pill?
Q. my breasts have grown bigger since i've been on the pill, but i didn't get and soreness or aching which i'm concerned about? Of course i'm not complaining, but is it possible that they can grow without any of those side effects? ...
A. 30 October 2012: Yes, it is probably because of the pill. Mine were a cup size bigger while I was taking it...but It was related to water retention.... (read in full...)
I'm uncomfortable that my daughter with diabetes will inject herself in public. Am I wrong for feeling this way?
Q. Okay, a very tricky question here. About a year ago my 24 years old my daughter suddenly developed diabetes type 1 - yes, type 1 where you have to take insulin - and ever since then she has to take insulin shots 4 times a day. We have no history ...
A. 29 October 2012: As long as she is discrete and discards her needle appropriately in a medical waste or sharps container, I don't see any problem with what she is doing.... (read in full...)
Vitamin supplements that could help improve my memory?
Q. Hey everyone, Just a heads up its not a relationship question,but they are so many wise people out here,so I thought I would reach out to you guys.. So I have a very very important and life changing exam in december,and I'm putting in a lot of work...
A. 29 October 2012: Have you tried coffee? Te best way to study is to teach another person the material. My fiance has received straight A's in all his graduate level classes because he organized a study group, took control, and explained all the material. While an ... (read in full...)
My husband sides with his sister not me. How do I end this argurment and not feel aggrieved?
Q. I really need some help here as I am going round in circles. I have had a massive falling out with my sister in law and we have had nothing to do with each other for about 18 months. My husband sided with her in the argument so naturally things h...
A. 28 October 2012: I can only offer you the starting point to forgive:
You feel you are right. You despise being manipulated by others to seemingly conform to an ideal that is against your ethics or moral code. But it isn't about whether anyone was right or wrong... (read in full...)
Help!!! I'm so unhappy with myself... how can I pull myself out of this?
Q. I'm so unhappy with myself. I'm a terrible person and have lost all the people from my life because of it. i had a best friend from 13 years who did a lot for me and gave me eveything i wanted. i betrayed him and asked him to leave when he ...
A. 28 October 2012: Have you tried AA meetings? You do not need to be an alcoholic to attend...anyone who has a desire to abstain from alcohol is welcomed at the meetings. The 12-step program is about acknowledging that your life has become unmanageable and it ... (read in full...)
I'm planning on taking my 15 year old car on a 4 hour trip. What concerns should I have?
Q. This isnt a quetsion about sex or a relationship, its just a common worry. My car is a 98 ford, and im planning on taking it on a 4 hour trip, and im kind of antsy. ive never taken it more then 20 miles, but i dont have any problems with it. I ta...
A. 28 October 2012: As long as your car has been maintained you should be just fine.
You should check your tires and make sure they are in good shape. You also want to check the air pressure in your tires and add air if necessary. If your tires are worn unevenly... (read in full...)
She thinks I'm telling lies. So many misunderstandings. How do I convince her that I am the one telling the truth?
Q. i posted a question a couple weeks back and got some good feedback. i wanted to see if i couldn't get a few more opinions and elaborate on the most recent happenings. about six weeks ago, my girlfriend had asked to use my phone to look something u...
A. 28 October 2012: Have you asked her what she was doing on the dating site? Most dating sites require the person to sign up to search for people so she may have created her own profile.
... (read in full...)
If I play out this fantasy will is ruin our friendship?
Q. I am single, not been seeing anyone lately and I have a friend (a boy) who i spend lots of time with, he is younger than me about 2 years, I am 25 and he is 23 and I knew since i met him and he wanted to f*** me and I didn't think of him in any way ...
A. 27 October 2012: No, sweetie. Because you are 'out of his league' you will definitely compromise your friendship if you tell him you are horny and ask for his assistance calming you down.
Friends of the opposite sex are not to be used to calm the urges that you... (read in full...)
I don't approve of boyfriends friendship with this girl. what to do?
Q. my boyfriend and I have been arguing for the past few days about his friendship with a girl who continuously flirts with him. he says the flirting has stopped after the first time I confronted him about her texting him saying"call me so j can give...
A. 27 October 2012: This is the same girl from your previous questions? (I'm not going to post them here because you have posted anonymously.)
I think it is time to establish with her the simple fact that he is in a relationship with you and her flirting and mani... (read in full...)
Co-worker who I can't avoid. Why is she manipulative and cold with me?
Q. I need help with a woman that I come into contact with in relation to my work. We're not co-workers exactly, but she now teaches in the college where I am currently researching - she dropped out of PhD research to become a tutor whilst I carried ...
A. 27 October 2012: If this woman feels like you are the 'queen bee' in your research circle, she may be intimidated by your success (she dropped out of research to tutor). If she was manipulative, she would be dealing with you more so she could figure out how to pull ... (read in full...)
My ex is pleading for me to come back. How do I tell him I've fallen in love with another?
Q. Ok so I broke up with my boyfriend of 7 and a half years about a month ago. I just didn't feel like I was in love anymore and I want to feel this way and be happy/not miserable for the rest of my life. We had two dogs and lived together in a fairly ...
A. 27 October 2012: The truth is, the romantic relationship between you and your ex boyfriend ended long before you officially broke thing off with him. Perhaps you could try explaining to him that when it became clear that he was not interested in the same goals you ... (read in full...)
Why would an almost stranger go through my bag in these circumstances?
Q. This is a very little matter indeed, but I come to you to find out (or confirm) if it is weird. I'm working with a family - a Father and daughter... they have asked me to adapt their daughter's book that she wrote when she was 6 into a play. Alr...
A. 27 October 2012: I'd probably feel violated if someone went through my purse and used my chapstick.
My gut feeling is he was curious about what was in your purse (i knew a few boys in high school who loved going through a girls purse just to see what was in it.) ... (read in full...)
What is the exact way to deal with people who are egotistical but don't express their emotions easily?
Q. Okay, it seems that Guys who have the following characteristics are Egotistical to the max. Characteristics: Intelligent, Sophisticated, Reserved, Frank, Straightforward, Don't express emotions easily. Ive seen that such people are not chest-bea...
A. 27 October 2012: I've dealt with guys like this. I usually just prepare myself for misogynistic comments and reply straight-forward both calmly and confidently. If they are too egotistical to try to see my side of the discussion, I ignore them.... (read in full...)
My wife has been keeping secrets from me. What did she do in Vegas?
Q. My wife and I were in Venice sitting on a hotel balcony overlooking the Grand Canal. We were joined by 2 girls in their mid 20s and a boy about the same age. Conversation let to what our favorite city was. When my wife's turn came she stated h...
A. 27 October 2012: Whatever she does in Vegas, the thought alone was enough for her to request a drag off of a strange girl's cigarette. (Why a medical professional would put something that has been in a stranger's mouth up to their lips is beyond me...so many ... (read in full...)
Twelve years together. But now his porn addiction has taken a nasty turn for the worse. Should I dump him?
Q. My man friend (been together 12 years) has a porn addiction. In the last 6 months..he's given out his phone number so these nasty ladies can contact him by text. He say's it's just a game. The other day I looked at his history and discover...
A. 26 October 2012: Yes, you should dump him. Don't be surprised if he trys to play you for a fool and makes up excuses (it wasn't me it was a computer virus, OR my computer was hacked, I didn't do it.)
Things will not improve if you stay. If he uses your computer... (read in full...)
I have to have surgery and I'm afraid
Q. im really really really scared about my scoliosis surgery i have the feeling im going to die or something will go wrong, or i will be paralysed forever. what is the chance something will go wrong? is it as bad as i think it is? i don't like the i...
A. 25 October 2012: I didn't see that the surgery was for scoliosis. I know two girls that I went to middle school with has scoliosis surgery and both came out perfectly fine.
I also have one friend who wasn't diagnosed with scoliosis until her late 20s. She was ... (read in full...)
Ladies: Is it a deal breaker if a guy is bald?
Q. I have a crush on this kinda shy younger girl I work with. She's very cool, shy, friendly and I happen to think she's beautiful. The problem is I'm 10 years older than her and I'm bald. We wear hats where we work so she probably doesn't know thi...
A. 25 October 2012: Patrick Stewart (the bald Captian Picard from Star Trek the Next Generation) was voted sexiest man alive in 1992. Additionally, he has placed very high in other 'sexiest man' features for different publications.
You, sir, are in good company ... (read in full...)
I have to have surgery and I'm afraid
Q. im really really really scared about my scoliosis surgery i have the feeling im going to die or something will go wrong, or i will be paralysed forever. what is the chance something will go wrong? is it as bad as i think it is? i don't like the i...
A. 23 October 2012: When I was 13, I noticed a bulge in my right groin area. It turned out to be a hernia and I had surgery scheduled to repair it. I was also given the option to have exploratory surgery on the left side (10% of children/teens who have a hernia have ... (read in full...)
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