I'm having a second affair after I promised I would never leave him again, do I stay with him or follow my heart and be with the man I love?
Q. This could be a long post but I have to lay it all out. I am a married woman and have been with my husband for 13 years. He was my first serious relationship (I met him when I was 20). About 6 years ago I had an affair and told him I was leavin...
A. 25 September 2009: Do you honestly think that you should spend the rest of your life with a man you don't love just because he had a breakdown last time and because his family might be upset? How many lives do you expect to have? Having children with a man you don't ... (read in full...)
The man I love wont leave his wife for me and I feel so lonely!
Q. The man I'm in love with never told me that he would leave his wife.He pays all my bills,rent and still gives me extra money but,I'm just so lonely.He doesn't spend time with me like he use to in the beginning.He has keys to my house so he comes ...
A. 23 September 2009: Coming on Dear Cupid and saying that you're having an affair with a married man tends to generate the knee-jerk response and not much in the way of sympathy but you can have a little from me. We can't always choose who we love and many people love ... (read in full...)
No money, too much pride and now no respect for him
Q. Hi, I'm 26 and my boyfriend is 35. We both got made redundant in jan 2009. We are currently in big trouble financially, my partner has not found a job since january and is obsessing over the idea of going to college. my partner used to earn £40...
A. 22 September 2009: You have a biological obligation to ditch this deadbeat - survival of the fittest, evolution - the human race only progresses if women don't breed with men that can't or won't support them.... (read in full...)
I gave him bj but he couldn't stay hard and didn't cum
Q. hey i have this boyfriend.. we have been together for 2 years and we havent had sex till now... i am not quite ready for it and well my guy hasnt pressured me either... which is nice. we are both virgins and we are both 23. yesterday was ...
A. 21 September 2009: Something is not altogether right. Generally for a 23 year old guy getting his first ever blow job it would be over in minutes. My guess is that for whatever reason he was feeling uncomfortable / nervous as that can certainly have that effect.... (read in full...)
Considering a divorce here...what do you all think?
Q. Immediate problem: my husband went away to a beer festival over the weekend with 5 other single guys when I specifically told him it made me uncomfortable and I didn't want him to go. The reason why this is a bigger issue than it would be normally...
A. 19 September 2009: The language that you use is pretty revealing:
"... when I specifically told him it made me uncomfortable and I didn't want him to go."
" ... just out right defied my feelings"
He is your husband (for the time being) not a dog or a difficult... (read in full...)
How do you make a back rub sexy?
Q. My boyfriend says that back massages are a turn-on for him, but they have never seemed particularly sexy to me. Since I can't see the sexual aspect of it, it's been hard for me to incorporate them into our foreplay because I can't figure out how to ...
A. 17 September 2009: Are you making the mistake of only using your hands? Obviously you shouldn't be wearing anything down below. Straddle him at his bum or lower back and make it either a 3 point or 5 point rub.... (read in full...)
He's a really big guy...but not so big "down there". Why might this be?
Q. my boyfriend turned 18 back in july and we got together about 2 weeks after his birthday. we had sex about a month into it. he is a really big guy (6'4" 220 lbs.) so i suppose i was expecting him to be pretty "well endowed". i was wrong. hes only ...
A. 13 September 2009: Sadly, speaking as a 300 pounder, there's just not that much connection between size, height and penis size. Whether he lets on or not he is self conscious about it which means that he is likely to treat you better in bed and out of it. If he is ... (read in full...)
I am 25, a virgin and never kissed a girl. I am considering going to a hooker, is this a good idea?
Q. Well, i'm 25 and I have never had sex, even I have never kissed a woman. So I have alrady decided to pay a hooker. I'm very exited about that, but at the same time scared. Am I doing something good or at the contrary? All the time I was expecting ...
A. 13 September 2009: I understand what you are thinking and why. Send me a private message and I'll give you some advice.... (read in full...)
I'm in love with a married man...HELP!
Q. I started interning for this company about a year ago. That's were I met him. He was my boss and a solid 18 years older than I am. There was no immediate attraction. I knew he was married and the thought of us being together never ever evvvverr ...
A. 13 September 2009: Gina is right although not because of any requirement for feminine solidarity with his wife or because what he is doing is despicable but rather because as you know already this situation will not end well for you. Move on, move away and if you ... (read in full...)
Husband cheated, don't want to stay but don't want to destroy our family
Q. I've been married for almost three years now my husband has put me down and called me names our whole relationship I left him july of last year for cheating on me but I came back cause I found out I was pregnant I thought that things would change ...
A. 13 September 2009: Get out now whilst you are still young. Many people start out with a bad marriage and find a great one second time around. Don't wait because it won't get any better regardless of what he might try to say.... (read in full...)
I'm seen as the quiet kid who never talks
Q. When I was a little kid I had many friends and always talked to other kids. Around grade 4 my parents split up and I moved in with my mom and sister into an apartment. When we moved in I made friends with other kids in the building, but there were ...
A. 12 September 2009: Do you mind? I'm mean that seriously, do you want to spend your time chatting with people over largely inconsequential things or is it that somehow you feel that you need to be talking to people integrate yourself into the group. If you do mind... (read in full...)
My husband's addicted to the gym and steroids! How do I get him to stop?
Q. I found out recently my husband's become addicted to the gym. When I first discovered he liked going the gym, I thought nothing of it, OK, it's just a hobby, but then when it became addictive I thought he must be having an affair until I discovered ...
A. 11 September 2009: Baldness, impotence, high blood pressure, enlarged heart (that's not a good thing), liver tumours, liver cancer.... Just let him know that you have no intention of sticking around when he has to start living with the consequences.
Ask him in y... (read in full...)
Is his sex drive normal for a guy who's 20?
Q. Hi I'm in need of a bit of advise and clarification if its needed. Me and my boyfriend have been together for just over 7 months and we have great sex. However he is hardly ever in the mood so we rarely have it and least once every 2 or 3 weeks. I'...
A. 10 September 2009: That is certainly well outside the range of what I would consider normal.... (read in full...)
Does my husband have another life in the UK???
Q. I've become concerned at the amount of time my husband has been spending flying out to the United Kingdom. I've noticed a lot of flight bills for flights to "Manchester, United Kingdom" and "Bolton, United Kingdom". At first I thought it was b...
A. 10 September 2009: If he's an employee then how on earth does he get the time off work?... (read in full...)
Guys: What goes on in a cheater's mind?
Q. Does a married man fall in love with the other woman/have feelings for her or do they just go back with their wife and family as if nothing ever happened. I know they have made their choice of going back with their wife but for whatever little ...
A. 9 September 2009: People vary in this respect as they do in every other. It is however perfectly plausible / possible for a man to feel genuine care and even love for a mistress / lover and yet go home and have a loving and warm (and of course sexual) relationship ... (read in full...)
How long does a guy usually last when you go down on them?
Q. So my BF and I have reached 3rd base. (hands onley so far) His b-day is coming up soon, and I think I'd like to try going down on him... All I'm wondering, is how long does a guy usually last? I'm not worried about the whole coming in mouth thing, ...
A. 9 September 2009: There is a huge range. If he's 40 you'd probably be down there for half an hour but if he's 17 and you do it right, you'll be done in a few minutes.... (read in full...)
I'm so guilty that I cheated on my husband. Should I tell him?
Q. A few days ago, I slept with a male friend while my husband was out of town visiting relatives. It only happened, once, i swear, and I did not intend for it to happen. I didn't set out looking to cheat, it's something that just happened. We'd had a ...
A. 8 September 2009: Don't under any account tell him. It's not what you did that causes him pain but him finding out about it. If by any chance he finds out through any other channel then deny it with vigour - if you love him then put your whole heart and soul into ... (read in full...)
Is he lying so I won't think there's another girl?
Q. well......my BF Jon dumped me becuz he was getting ready to go bac to skool and he said it would b to hard to focus on his school work and it didnt make since to me cuz i've been in skool for 3 to 4 weeks now and my grade on papers r fine and hes a ...
A. 8 September 2009: Has he seen your writing recently? That could well be what caused him to want to move on. I assume that you write this way to be funny but the problem is that, if you keep doing it, you will start to think that it is an acceptable way to ... (read in full...)
Each time my boyfriend goes away on a business trip I find condoms in his bag, and we don't even use them!
Q. My boyfriend of 6 years went on a business trip last weekend. When he came back, I found a receipt for condoms. We don't use condoms. He says he was the one responsible for till slips for the team. but, why would someone try and claim condoms from ...
A. 8 September 2009: Would you rather he didn't use them?
He doesn't seem fully up to speed. Every guy who cheats whilst away on business knows that you ditch the condoms as part of the process of checking out of your room: check you have your passport, your wal... (read in full...)
Am I wrong for being happy that my daughter has a good relationship with her father?
Q. I have been with the man I'm with now for 2 years and our relationship is ready to crumble. I have a daughter with my ex that I was with for 12 years and my current man can not handle our friend relationship. It hurts me deeply that he can't see ...
A. 8 September 2009: No, you are not wrong, he is insecure. He needs to pull himself together.... (read in full...)
I thought our relationship was great...so why did he end things?
Q. Last week, what I thought was a perfect relationship ended. My bf and I have been together for over three yrs. things have always been good, we lived together for a short while and I was even pregnant with his baby (unfortunately I lost him). We are ...
A. 6 September 2009: Don't over react. I think that Taste of India has it exactly this sounds like a standard guy panic. If you behave well, don't pressure him, give him love but don't smother him but also, gently, let him know (through actions rather than words) that ... (read in full...)
Dumped by my bofriend because I slightly lied about my sexual history
Q. I need men's advices. My boyfriend with whom I have been with for 6 great months dumped me 3 days ago because I decided to be honest and admit I had lied to him regarding my past sexual history (I told him I had slept with 10 guys instead of 13). ...
A. 4 September 2009: Its a gross over-reaction. He sounds very insecure. You are probably better off without him.... (read in full...)
Will I be alone for a very long time?
Q. Hello Well i wrote about m previous experience on here about my first time experience in a brothel (first time ever) and what it taught me.... that i want a slow meaningful relationship with a girl (as i know for sure i dont want just sex as i kn...
A. 4 September 2009: I can identify with a lot of what is going on here with you although it was all rather a long time ago. I was also a somewhat muscly 19 year old ( I was British Universities Weighlifting Silver Medalist twice) and I didn't find myself attracted to ... (read in full...)
Slip sliding away...
Q. i keep slipping out during sex or when g/f is on top she carnt really move up and down as out he pops despite her being tight.when we start im ok pushing into her but when i pull back thats when the problem starts I have just over 5 inches and my ...
A. 4 September 2009: Sexlessintheuk is absolutely right but I can't help feeling that a technique adjustment would help you as well, certainly as regards slipping out when she's on top.
It sounds as if your girlfriend is supporting her weight on her legs and moving h... (read in full...)
Once a cheater always a cheater? Found a phone number in my husbands pocket and called it.
Q. I have no one to talk too,this is how I found this website.I don't know for sure my husband is cheating, found phone number while doing laundry. I called it, it was a female,she did'nt know what to say,one lie after another.turns out she works for ...
A. 2 September 2009: Honestly, speaking as a guy that occasionally strays, if he has her phone number in his pocket then it just doesn't stack up that he's having an affair with her unless he's a little slow. There could be an entirely innocent explanation but he is ... (read in full...)
Do guys prefer small, petite girls?
Q. Do guys prefer small, petite girls? I'm 4'11. Most of my guy friends love short girls, but I have met some who prefer 5'6 and over. What do you think?...
A. 2 September 2009: One of the wonderful things about this world it that we are all programmed to like different things and yes there are plenty of men who like very petite girls. ... (read in full...)
We have a sexual relationship only, should he at least have sent me a birthday card?
Q. I have a sexual relationship with this man. We have been seeing eachother for a while, mind you mainly just for sex. It was my birthday the other day and he did not call to say Happy Birthday. I did not expect a gift but I was expecting a phone ...
A. 31 August 2009: Yes. No matter how few strings there are he should have acknowledged your birthday.... (read in full...)
I'm cheating on my wife with my best friend's wife
Q. I am falling in love with my wifes best friend. Her husband is my best friend. We both have 2 kids from our respective spouses. We have never had sex but we have been to third base two times. I know I am a horrible friend and husband, but we were ...
A. 19 August 2009: Bad idea. Look elsewhere for your excitement if you must. This has "disaster" written all over it.... (read in full...)
Married, slept with a women at work, am a wreck, what do I do?
Q. Met this women at work, we love to talk to eachother and we find eachother attractive, i've been married for ages and am in my 40s, shes 12 years younger. I've been resonably happily married, i always felt a little lonely, i love contact and inti...
A. 19 August 2009: Really you are punishing yourself too much here. If you are so guilt ridden it is almost certain that your wife will be able to tell and as others have said here, the worst possible outcome is for your wife to find out as it will just hurt her ... (read in full...)
Why do men/women cheat on their husband/wife?
Q. Why do men/women cheat on their husband/wife? Is it just because they can't resist a beautiful person? Is it because they aren't fully committed? Well then, why did they get married in the first place? Is it because their spouse changes? I love my...
A. 15 August 2009: It is very hard to tell which men will cheat and which will not. Maybe 20-25% of men are genuinely good men (or have low sex drives) and wouldn't cheat under any circumstances and then at the other end you have the obvious players / womanizers etc. ... (read in full...)
What can I put in this resignation letter?
Q. Not really a relationship or love question, but advice is required. All i want to know is, what on earth do you put in a resignation letter. Things where i work have become unbearable, and i know i should be grateful i have a job, as so man...
A. 12 August 2009: Unless you plan on taking legal action against your employer, in which case you should consult your lawyer before writing the letter, then pretty much the less that you say the better. There is no benefit to you in venting even if you feel that you ... (read in full...)
Could overworking be the reason for our family troubles?
Q. Does spending too much time with working ,but not enough time with family and wife,can cause family crises? Can it be the reason of my kids drug addiction,and my husband's impotence? He works 12 hours a day,7 days a week. Is this possible that ...
A. 9 August 2009: It is certainly possible that that would be the cause of those kind of problems, yes.... (read in full...)
Is the married man I'm seeing the one for me?
Q. I really don't know how to put this without seeming like the bad guy or appearing incredibly stupid. But I am going to try as I really need advice even though it seems so stupid. I have been seeing a married man for over 2 years now. He is slightly ...
A. 9 August 2009: Really this sounds like a very bad idea for you. I cheat on my beautiful, kind and perfect wife (I'm not being sarcastic) - as it happens I cheated today with a rather nice 19 year old fashion student - this time of year being open season on t... (read in full...)
Confused about how HIV can be transferred!
Q. Ok So i wanted to ask this question because a friend said that u cant get infected with aids if u swallow blood and u dont have cuts or sores I was like noway man u do get aids from swallowing blood I said that coz i've read that u can get aids fro...
A. 9 August 2009: The HIV virus is delicate when it is outside of it's preferred home environment - your blood. The acids in your stomach are strong and would pretty quickly deal with the virus. The risk with oral sex, which honestly isn't that huge (still best not ... (read in full...)
How do I go about making a threesome in the best way for both of us?
Q. Me and my fiance have been together for a long time and had our ups and dwns and I want to make things interesting by having a 3 sum before we tie the knot to make up for the too low of a budget for bachlor and bachlorette parties. I'm fine with ...
A. 9 August 2009: When I was about 22 I bought a little flat in London with a side on view of the river. The mortgage was 7 x what I earned in a year. I was incredibly proud of that place. I loved it. The first weekend after I moved in I was invited in for tea by ... (read in full...)
I need help?! My dad stares at my breasts and down there, is this normal?
Q. ok hi my parents are divorced and my dad likes looks at me at lot 2 times i saw him looking at mt breasts and he always hugs me and if he sees that i have make up on he tells me im beautiful without it and i also saw him stare at me a lot and once ...
A. 9 August 2009: Please be really careful here because a wrong word to the wrong person and you could really screw up your relationship with your Dad for years to come. Unless you have some other reason to think that your dad is strange then he is probably just ... (read in full...)
My wife is not as interested sexually in me as she was with her ex'es!
Q. what to do when my wife is not as interested in me sexually as she was with her exes? i've been married for just over two years. throughout our marriage my wife has never been that into sex with me. while we were dating, it was a problem. and it ...
A. 8 August 2009: Really difucult to break out of these patterns. If you don't feel like a man to yourself then you certainly won't feel like a man to her. Without knowing more about you it is hard to say but work on activities unrelated to sex which build your ... (read in full...)
We want a 3rd person to videotape our sex sessions? Good idea or not?
Q. I and my husband are seriously discussing to have our love making session video taped by another person. We are not exhibitionists or swingers, and have never done anything like this before. We don't want that person to join us for any sex play. ...
A. 8 August 2009: Go with satindesire's plan here. Even rent or borrow a couple of extra video cameras so that you can edit together. If actually having the other person there doing the taping is important to you then you ARE exhibitionists.... (read in full...)
My gorgeous gf gets hit on by other guys and she hates it. How can we deal with this?
Q. Hi Aunts, My Problem isn't really a big one but its driving me mad!My Girlfriend is super attractive Shes 5 11' skinny long brown hair she could pass as a model.Thats not the problem though the problem is every where we go shes constant...
A. 8 August 2009: Growl at people.
Honestly, works wonders.... (read in full...)
Why can't or won't my husband tell me the truth about his infidelities?
Q. Recently I found out my husband of 13 1/2 years moved up from visiting porn sites to answering escort ads from sites like craigslist. I also found out that he has been visiting asian massage places for a while for r and t...found his account and ...
A. 8 August 2009: Your comment that you don't want to "reward" him by having sex with him is quite telling. Sex is not a treat that you toss you your husband for being a good boy or when he sits up and begs for it. It is a fundamental part of your relationship. If ... (read in full...)
How can I learn to live with knowing that he doesn't find me attractive? Is that even important?
Q. My husband told me before me we married that he does not look at porn, but about 6 months ago I caught him at it, and he admitted he has been doing it throughout our 2 year marriage. When we were dating, he couldn't keep his hands off me and wanted ...
A. 8 August 2009: I agree with the first 3 posters. I think that you are imagining a problem which isn't really there. However, having said that, 20lbs is an awful lot of weight to gain in 2 years and it sounds as if you would be happier in yourself if you were to ... (read in full...)
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