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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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I'm in love with my FWB....he is my ex boyfriend.
Q. I am in love with my friends with benefits....he is my ex boyfriend. we became best friends and then we went to being friends with benefits. the thing is that i have fallen for him and i don't know what to do. he is a really sweet guy. we have date...
A. 29 March 2009: To the anonymous poster: are you 15? No really, if you are going to contradict my answers please don't do it anonymously as it discredits your answers!
If our poster was a crack addict, would it be ok for her boyfriend to give her crack? And then... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my FWB....he is my ex boyfriend.
Q. I am in love with my friends with benefits....he is my ex boyfriend. we became best friends and then we went to being friends with benefits. the thing is that i have fallen for him and i don't know what to do. he is a really sweet guy. we have date...
A. 28 March 2009: Wow! he's in the perfect relationship sex on tap and none of the responsibility! This is not FWBs, it is using a girl that loves him to have his cake and eat it!
Sweetheart he is using you, he knows you love him so he, can mess you around as much ... (read in full...)
I think my teacher is in love with me!
Q. i am in high school and i think my algebra teacher likes me. first i want 2 say i do not like him other than a teacher and nothing more. but him i am not so sure about. he always is staring at me and flirts with me. one time i was absent for like a ...
A. 28 March 2009: Like Bubbloo said you have posted this before, you need to tell, your headteacher/ parents about this.... (read in full...)
Buzzing in the ears from clubbing. Any advice?
Q. Everybody has had the experience of going out clubbing, and going home with a very loud ringing and buzzing in their ears, and it can last for half of the next day buzzing. Is there any advice or remedy that someone might know of to make the buzz...
A. 28 March 2009: I always wear ear plugs in night clubs and loud gigs.
The buzzing in your ears will normally go away after a few hours, but then you will never hear that pitch again! The more often you go to these clubs the more damage you will do to your hea... (read in full...)
Should I leave my wife for this other women and risk end up being alone?
Q. I am in a 20 years marriage that has lasted 10 yrs too long. I have been seeing another woman twice a month for 2 years. I don't want to hurt my wife, but I'm not in love w/her anymore. The other woman loves me, but is married w/three kids. She ...
A. 28 March 2009: I think you are being massively selfish! You don't want to end up alone? Come on!
If you don't love your wife, you are just using her as security against being alone, leave her and let her find a new decent man who actually loves her!
And if ... (read in full...)
I need cancer advice.
Q. yes i have cancer i move to spain i am married whith a navy mam becuse may cancer he is in california i am in spain becuse i need heelp and i would like to have supoort went we are together again .i do not know what to do to get informations a ...
A. 25 March 2009: Your husband needs to speak with his ships doctor and welfare officer about this so he can find out what support the Navy can give you. ... (read in full...)
Every time I go to confess my feelings for her, she tells me of a crush she has on someone else!
Q. I just want to ask for some advice about confessing my love to someone very special to me. I've been secretly in love (yes, in love, and I know the difference between crush and love) for this very good friend of mine for over a year now. I thin...
A. 22 March 2009: If she is going abroad you have nothing to loose, so go for it!... (read in full...)
My friends and boyfriend don't care
Q. i went out to a town centre that i havent been to before with my friends and my boyfriend and they abandoned me. i sat down and got out my phone and when i looked up again they were gone. i walked around for an hour no clue were i was going and i ra...
A. 22 March 2009: Nice friends and a lovely boyfriend! I think it is time for you to ditch the "IN" crowd and find some genuine people who actually care about you.... (read in full...)
Penis curves to the right..is this normal?
Q. I am 22 years old and i am just wondering why when i have an erection my penis curves to the right. From the view of me looking down at it. i was just wondering is this normal and is there any way to fix it to be strait or is this just the way it is ...
A. 22 March 2009: Yes it's normal, only time to be concerned is if you have pain with it. But if you need reassurance go and see your doctor.... (read in full...)
I told a secret and now I'm really regretting it!
Q. i told my two best friends a really big big big big big secret like a life changing one and now i wish i wouldnt have told them. they havent told anyone yet but i feel like they are going to tell and im scared because if they do i know it will not ...
A. 22 March 2009: If you can't trust them why did you tell them? It sounds too me that you are worried because you can't keep a secret to yourself that they can't either!
Trust is the most important thing in friendship, so you really are putting your friends ... (read in full...)
He isn't on the same page as you, what do you do?
Q. i've been with this guy for 2 1/2 years, married for almost 1 and I thought he was for me. english is his second language, and even though i speak his language too I feel like I can't communicate with him at all. i like to use big vocabulary and ...
A. 22 March 2009: I hate to encourage this but if you are truly not happy and by the sound of it you are looking for excuses to leave him. Do it, have the courage to leave this guy and don't string him along while you have an (emotional) affair.
But if you do fall ... (read in full...)
My cousin stares at me
Q. It bother me a lot because My cousin keep stared at me almost often. What wrong w that? Can ya tell me?? ...
A. 22 March 2009: Ask him if you have a spot on your face, and when he says no then ask him what he's staring at, and that it's a bit creepy!
He will then get the message not to stare at you and also that you don't have the same feelings for him as he does for you.... (read in full...)
I love texting him but hate leading him on!
Q. ok...i have been having a huge issue lately. i am 17 and i have been texting this guy who is 27 for 10 months now. We text almost every minute and he sounds like a great guy. he has sent me pics but i havent sent him any. the problem is is that i ...
A. 22 March 2009: You have to tell him the truth! Then it is up to him what he does next, I don't know what the legal age of consent is in your State. But it's not fair that he doesn't know the truth.... (read in full...)
Fingering...
Q. How many fingers should a guy be able to get into a girl's vagina when fingering her? Is it possible she could be too "tight" to even get one in?...
A. 22 March 2009: Well it's not all about trying to get as many fingers as possible, this is all part of the stupid myth that girls get turned on by something huge in there. What you need to do is find her clitoris which can be stimulate with one finger and its not ... (read in full...)
We both want a baby..but we know we're young!
Q. I'm 14, and My boyfriend(16) and I are sure that We want a future together....but the only thing is, We are in a long-distance Relationship. We talk about this all the time and I'm having such a hard time deciding what to do. My Boyfriend is most ...
A. 22 March 2009: Wow that makes it all better you should definitely have his baby if you have seen him on web cam! Unfortunately online relationships are more about the idea of falling in love than actually really falling in love you may not even like him when you ... (read in full...)
Doggy style...did I lose my virginity?
Q. My boyfriend and I, are/were both virgins. I'm 13 and He's 15. We did "doggy style" tonight for the very first time, No protection was used. So did I actually..lose my virginity? That's the thing I'm confused about....
A. 22 March 2009: Yes to both, you lost your virginity and you could be pregnant, you could also have a long list of sexually transmitted diseases.
You need to speak to a Doctor as soon as possible. And NEVER have sex with out a CONDOM!
... (read in full...)
Any awesome ideas by my honey's birthday?
Q. I want to make the perfect strip teasing-make you sweat-burn some calories (ha ha) CD. I like things with a good beat and for this genre a seductive lyrical, Some genres i like are: Hip hop, techno, rave, industrial, grunge, rock, etc. Some band...
A. 22 March 2009: You want music for lapdancing try the Pussy cat dolls, they were all strippers so their music tends to have that kind of theme.... (read in full...)
We both want a baby..but we know we're young!
Q. I'm 14, and My boyfriend(16) and I are sure that We want a future together....but the only thing is, We are in a long-distance Relationship. We talk about this all the time and I'm having such a hard time deciding what to do. My Boyfriend is most ...
A. 22 March 2009: Is this a wind up?? I want a baby with a guy I've never met? Seriously?
Sweetheart I really think you need to read your post and the answers are there looking back at you!
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE GUY he might be 40 for all you know, come on a ... (read in full...)
Anyone knows the dating age difference in France?
Q. what are the dateing age diffrences in france? i might be headed there this summer. i thought maybe you could tell me just how big the age diffrences are between men and women there? ...
A. 22 March 2009: This is a very strange question, would you care to elaborate?... (read in full...)
Am I just a one night stand and being played by this guy?
Q. I meet this guy (who is slightly older than me) who gave me his number (whole address in fact). Later that week he and i meet upand got on really well n talk about all sorts of things ended bein up all night and then spent the next 3days with him ...
A. 21 March 2009: It does sound like he is playing you and I think you know it too.... (read in full...)
Should I wait till the 6 weeks is up or take it that I am not pregnant?
Q. Heya. I was just wondering, I have had my last period about 4 1/2 weeks ago which normally I don't have a period for like 6 Weeks. But recently I have been very tired, aching and some white quite thick sticky discharge. I have been told these are ...
A. 21 March 2009: You've had all the pregnancy spiel so I won't carry on with that. as for not drinking on your 21st... Antibiotics for a wisdom tooth infection... It's common at your age, not too gross and metronizadol is the antibiotic of choice, which used to be ... (read in full...)
I defended her, now she dumps me. WTH?
Q. Ok so me and my girlfriend an som other friends were hanging out. and my girlfriend was messing around playin with one of my other friends, and somthing hapened im not sure what but he ended up hiting her hard. i got up and hit him so hard tha my h...
A. 21 March 2009: I stand by what I said originally. Violence to prevent harm, not as retaliation you did wrong! And to our brave anonymous poster grow up mate! There maybe a time and place for violence but you obviously don't understand either!
Our posters ... (read in full...)
Am I mentally psycho???
Q. I'm 22 and I sometimes have Panic attacks, it started off last November when I found out that my boyfriend has expressed his feeling to one of his co-workers. We are still together, when I ask him why he did something like that he told me that he ...
A. 21 March 2009: YES you are Nuts go and see a Doctor!... (read in full...)
We used to be so happy together. What is going on?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for about 2 years and a month. He left his wife about 3 years ago and moved back home. We got together after that and he is going through the divorce. She lives in another state. I'm confused on why he won't ask ...
A. 21 March 2009: I hate to say this but this guy has PYSCHO written all over him! Why did his ex wife leave him? Was it because he was too controlling?
I think next time time he's away change the locks and your phone number and enjoy a new life.... (read in full...)
Do you think he's just scared and will come back?
Q. Hi, I'm 4 months pregnant with my ex's baby we had been together 4 years and this was planned. We started going through a rocky period recently, during this time my ex slept with someone else and ended up finishing with me for her. I got in touch ...
A. 21 March 2009: The Anonymous poster took the words out of my mouth! Bravo that man! (I'm guessing you are a man) ... (read in full...)
Any tips on how to get rid of water retention in the stomach?
Q. Hey guys, I was hoping on getting some tips from you guys, well I've been trying to tone up for the past year, doing regular excercise and sit ups every day and eating healthy and frequently, I am of a medium build and 5'6, overall I have toned up, ...
A. 21 March 2009: Are you sure your stomach is bloated? It is very easy to become a little obsessive when it comes to toning up. What have your friends/family said? Being in the forces, a lot of my soldiers get on fitness sprees when we are on tour and many of them ... (read in full...)
Shaving pubic area and itchy!
Q. my girlfriend wanted me to shave my pubic hair off so i have and it itches down there now so have any of you got any tips please...
A. 21 March 2009: Keep it clean down there and watch for in growing hairs, it's going to itch like hell for the next week. In future as Kelly said just trim or wax.
Also why does your girlfriend want you to look like the last Chicken in Tescos? And I've just not... (read in full...)
Advice for looking older?
Q. Hello I'm 15 years old almost 16,I'm 5 foot and quite young for my year which doesn't make things easy for me.I still look as if i'm 12 and i get quite a bit of slagging from people because of that.I was wondering if you had any advice for looking ...
A. 21 March 2009: Get a passport to prove your age, and just be yourself, when you hit you 30s-40s, you'll be happy that you don't look your age.... (read in full...)
Are we ready?
Q. okay here goes I'm 18 years old and will be 19 in june. I have been with my partner for over a year, we have been living together for 10 months and we adore each other. We both have stable jobs and have the option to overtime if we wanted. e...
A. 21 March 2009: Your mind seems to be made up, so why ask for advice?... (read in full...)
Are we ready?
Q. okay here goes I'm 18 years old and will be 19 in june. I have been with my partner for over a year, we have been living together for 10 months and we adore each other. We both have stable jobs and have the option to overtime if we wanted. e...
A. 21 March 2009: A wedding ring is much cheaper than a baby, why not get married and show that you can commit to each other and actually live together for more than a matter of months as you'll have at least 18 years of being together if you have a child.
Also ... (read in full...)
Uncontrollable sweat!!
Q. ok this is embarrasing. i am a girl 13 turning 14 in a few days. and i have this issue. I WONT STOP SWEATING. for example i alwaysss wear jackets because my underarms sweat even when its cold and so do my hands. i would love to hold hands with the ...
A. 21 March 2009: Right you've had lots of clinical advise here which suggests this is a medical problem, so GO AND SEE A DOCTOR, who will diagnose and prescribe you something rather than taking medical advise from an anonymous poster, I'm sure drysol is great in ... (read in full...)
What's your dream girl/guy?
Q. If you could have a dream girl/guy what would they be like??...
A. 21 March 2009: Someone who doesn't post stupid questions on dear cupid! Who is intelligent and not self-obsessed!
... (read in full...)
I miss him like crazy... How long will it take me to get over him?
Q. I ended it with my boyfriend because (even though I'm totally mad about him) the way he treated me was not good enough. He never took me out, or bothered introducing me to his friends. He would take without giving and I don't think he was that into ...
A. 21 March 2009: Well done for getting rid of the prat! Unfortunately we can't just pin a time and date of when you will be over him.
Just go out have fun and meet new people and realise how much better off you are with out him.... (read in full...)
Hangover advice.
Q. Well, I need some advice... I'm so damn depressed so I have decided to go and get drunk on Monday morning after my first lecture at university, I won't be driving and will be with a sober person, I need to know how to get rid of the hangover by 3pm ...
A. 21 March 2009: PS. don't end up in an Emergency Department pissed and depressed it really does ruin our night!... (read in full...)
Hangover advice.
Q. Well, I need some advice... I'm so damn depressed so I have decided to go and get drunk on Monday morning after my first lecture at university, I won't be driving and will be with a sober person, I need to know how to get rid of the hangover by 3pm ...
A. 21 March 2009: Alcohol is a depressant so your mood will be lifted after 3-4 drinks and then with more alcohol you will go back down the depression route, and you will be pissed so you are likely to do stupid things.
The worst thing someone suffering depressi... (read in full...)
Should I stay with her?
Q. well its about my girlfriend, she has a hard time expressing her feelings, we talk but have a different sense of humor, i cant ask a serious question without getting a “your mom” joke, and i dont really understand her cause her mom doesnt let us ...
A. 21 March 2009: You don't want to leave her because you will be alone? Well stay with her and be miserable!
If you are not happy in your relationship even if you don't realise you are doing it you won't be putting the same effort in, which isn't fair on your gir... (read in full...)
Why do they always come running back crying to get a second chance?
Q. Maybe someone can help me understand this. why is it that when men want to end a relationship they act like jerk/assholes to make you leave them. and when you do and have moved on without them, they always come running back crying to get a second...
A. 21 March 2009: Because you take them back, you need to just tell them NO, or words to that effect, if a guy knows he can use you as a plan B he will.... (read in full...)
Do guys act like this when they're not interested in a girl?
Q. I've been talking to a guy on MSN, my friend introduced me to him, he's friend's with her sisters boyfriend, and I really, really like him, but I'm not sure if it's mutual. The conversations we have are totally random, anything from ice cream wedd...
A. 21 March 2009: Just tell him you like him ask him out, if he's not interested I'm sure he won't take the piss as he sounds like a nice guy.
Keep in touch with him while you are away then ask to meet up when you get home and see what happens.
But if you do... (read in full...)
I just wish I could tell myself it was a mistake, learn from it, never do it again
Q. I seriously need help, I need real advice. Well, I've been with My boyfriend for almost 5 months and right when We first started going out there was a guy I used to hang out with and he liked me. So of course he wanted to kiss me and he pretty much...
A. 21 March 2009: You really need to get over this, it was not a "sin" it was a kiss! you don't need counselling, you have shown remorse for what you have done, your boyfriend has forgiven you and I'm sure "God" has too as he's a forgiving kind of guy!
Get o... (read in full...)
I defended her, now she dumps me. WTH?
Q. Ok so me and my girlfriend an som other friends were hanging out. and my girlfriend was messing around playin with one of my other friends, and somthing hapened im not sure what but he ended up hiting her hard. i got up and hit him so hard tha my h...
A. 21 March 2009: Matching force with force never works, if you sorted him out without using excessive force it maybe different, but she has seen that your temper can just snap and that if anyone including her pisses you off you are likely to break your hand trying ... (read in full...)
What advice can I give him, and how can I get over this?
Q. Me and my ex broke up about 2 months ago. After we broke up my ex slept with a few girls, as an attempt to get over me. He admitted to me that it didnt work, and he still loves me. Last night I found out he got one of the one-night-stand girls pr...
A. 21 March 2009: I agree with Star! Make sure he gets that STI check and if you have slept with him since get one too.... (read in full...)
2 Problems! Girlfriend stopped wanting sex and also started smoking behind my back
Q. This is going to be kind of long but I am a 19 year old guy and my girlfriend (18 going on 19) of 2 years and I are going on a break and i have 2 big problems. Before i tell you what recently happend I'm going to tell you our relationship before ...
A. 21 March 2009: Your on a break my advise is to not get back together, you obviously want different things and have been growing apart for some time.
Start dating other people and find someone else.... (read in full...)
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