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... Send *rmyMedic a private message | | | *rmyMedic's profile:I'm a married, 29 year old from the UK.
I'm a sergeant in the British Army, so I deal with young people (mostly teens), who have all the usual dramas and long distance relationship issues.
My speciality is Medicine I've spent the last 12 years as an army medic, which means I have lots of experience in trauma (which isn't very helpful here), Sports therapy, travel medicine, and GU medicine (Sexual Health).
When I found out about this site, it seemed to be another way to help people out. But I am very straight talking, so please don't be too offended if you don't like my honest opinions.
If there is any advise you should take away from this site it is: Never do anything that you can't explain to a Paramedic and always practice safe sex. |
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| Latest articles: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them?
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: STI/STD what are they and how do you catch them? An STI is a sexually transmitted infection this is the "in vogue" name for what used to be called an Sexually transmitted disease (STD) This can range from pubic lice to AIDS and Hepatitis with m...
Why don't boys reply to my texts?
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
19 April 2009: Why don't boys reply to my texts? This is a commonly asked question at dear cupid and I understand it really isn't as important as a domestic violence question, but I feel it needs answering. Now this is just a personal opinion and if any guys ...
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2 Problems! Girlfriend stopped wanting sex and also started smoking behind my back
Q. This is going to be kind of long but I am a 19 year old guy and my girlfriend (18 going on 19) of 2 years and I are going on a break and i have 2 big problems. Before i tell you what recently happend I'm going to tell you our relationship before ...
A. 21 March 2009: Your on a break my advise is to not get back together, you obviously want different things and have been growing apart for some time.
Start dating other people and find someone else.... (read in full...)
No photo on wife's desk
Q. I've been married for 10 years, and feel like our relationship is still solid. However, recently I visited my wife's office and noticed that on her desk she had a photo of our son and a photo of her late (gay) boss, but no photo of me. Do you t...
A. 21 March 2009: I think you are being far too sensitive, but have you given her a nice framed photo of the two of you together or a family picture? ... (read in full...)
3 days after period unprotected sex..pregnant?
Q. I got my period this month.I had unprotected sex 3 days later.He cumed. but I didin't feel any cum go in me.Could I be pregnant?...
A. 21 March 2009: Of course you could be pregnant when will you people learn! UNPROTECTED SEX = BABIES AND STIs... (read in full...)
In love with soldier and a sailor..
Q. Dear Cupid, I'm in the worst situation I have ever been my whole entire life, so far. I cannot go by a day without thinking of this troubling situation. My story goes like this: When I was 13 I met a guy trough my brother( his friend)he w...
A. 20 March 2009: Don't string them both along find a nice Air Force guy they spend less time away!... (read in full...)
If she is 7 months older is that a big difference ???
Q. hi .. she is 7 months older than me .. is that a problem ???? ..i like her very much and i think she likes me too ... ...
A. 20 March 2009: Wow 7 months! I know girls mature faster than boys but I don't think it's going to make any difference at all unless the age of consent is over 21 in Sudan, you don't want here getting locked up for being a Paedophile now do you!... (read in full...)
Don't know if I wanna still be with my fiancee
Q. hey all. this ones kinda complicated for me. i am currently engaged to my girlfriend. but lately have been feeling like is this the person i really wanna be with!! see i give her everything i can to make her happy. but back in november i found...
A. 20 March 2009: Wow a lying cokehead, that's a shock! Mate seriously, trust is a major issue in all relationships and for this kind of thing will drive you insane.
Coke addicts will do all sorts of things to fuel their addiction and to cover up after themselv... (read in full...)
Boyfriend refuses to wear condoms!
Q. my boyfriend refuses to wear condoms and I'm afraid i might get pregnant if he doesn't my friend told me about different woman condoms would you suggest woman condoms if not what can i do...
A. 20 March 2009: Don't have sex with him, and tell him if he puts it anywhere near you with out one you have not consented to sex and it is therefore rape!
The female condom is a bit like trying to make love to a plastic bag!... (read in full...)
Did the military take this man's heart away?
Q. I've had a lover now for almost 7 months. I knew he wasn't boyfriend material for me Because we live in two different worlds. He's divorced father of 3 in the military and I am single..college educated well traveled. Not only that.. He ca...
A. 20 March 2009: We aren't all cold blooded. But the military life style can encourage a certain coldness as we expect death to be round the corner often, so selfishly, some soldiers will go out and womanise, enjoy themselves and treat every day at home as their ... (read in full...)
Why would she get back in touch? Am I reading too much into it?
Q. Here's a bit of background before I ask the questions: I started going out with this girl after she expressed interest in me and asked me, 2 and a half years ago. We were only together 2 months, as she cheated on me with another bloke. We kept ...
A. 20 March 2009: You are her Plan B or C I think, she has been dumped by these other guys and you have made it clear that you like her, so in the event she can't "pull" anyone else you are there as her insurance against being single, until she finds someone she ... (read in full...)
He won't take no for an answer, I'd really like to have a man's point of view on this one please.
Q. I have had a male friend for a few years now, he`s ten years older than me and married. All he wants to talk about is sex, he`s tried every trick in the book to get his way too. Although I want to stay friends with him I`m not intrested in ...
A. 20 March 2009: He only cares about sex and not your feelings, tell him straight, any REAL friend will understand, and it is only a matter of time before his wife finds out about you!... (read in full...)
I think I'm in love with a Turkish boy but are they all the same?
Q. I'm 17 live in Newcastle. I went to Turkey in September 08, had a wicked time and met a lot of boys but there's this one boy hit it off the first night, he gave me a rose and it started from there, and there was passion of course and we still chat ...
A. 20 March 2009: Yes they are all the same!
My sister got into a relationship with a Turkish guy found out that he had slept with LOTS of English girls every time she came home and when she dumped him, his family sent her death threats! (she still won't tell me ... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin but I haven't had my period in 2-3 months
Q. Ok I'm 13 and I'm a virgin but I havnt had my period in 2 almost 3 months and I'm too scared to tell my mom what should I do?????...
A. 20 March 2009: This is probably just you hormones developing and sorting themselves out.
But when you say you are a "Virgin" I take it you mean you have done NOTHING sexual with a boy? If you have had any contact with sperm near your vagina you could be pregnant... (read in full...)
Small penis confusion... need guidance asap
Q. okay, so im embarassed to tell my friend so im trusting this website will help me out, im gonna get straight to the question. ive had sex with 2 guys, im guessing both of them were 2-3 inches long erect. after about 5 min of having sex i lite...
A. 20 March 2009: Funny how only men have replied to this post, anyway, we get loads of guys worrying about penis size on here and the thing is EVERYONE is different, so you may have to find bigger guys to satisfy you, but other girls can enjoy themselves with a ... (read in full...)
Her comments about their 'bits' is making me feel self-conscious!
Q. My g/f keeps telling me about all the blokes 'bits' she sees at work. She is a radiographer so i can see that the medical profession should be used to this but she tells me she has never studied this and that there is no need for them to be naked, ...
A. 20 March 2009: She sounds utterly unprofessional, and shouldn't work in a medical field if she acts this way!... (read in full...)
I think my teacher is sexually attracted to me & I don't know what to do about it
Q. Last year I had an amazing chemistry teacher named "Sean" who is in his early forties. Not only was he amazing at teaching chemistry, but we had chemistry too. Sean is also the youth minister at my church. I'm only thirteen years old, but I know...
A. 20 March 2009: Please search for "crush on my teacher" this question has been asked thousands of times on here and lots and lots of advise has been given, but don't expect to like all the answers you see!... (read in full...)
Bump after unprotected sex 3 weeks ago..pregnant?
Q. Hi, im 15 and 3 week ago i had sex for the first time, and we didnt use protection, i know it was stupid not to, but now ive started putting on weight, to form a sort of bump on my stomach, and people have started asking if im pregnant, and i keep ...
A. 17 March 2009: I doubt you are pregnant! But see a Doctor anyway and also use protection in future as next time you won't be so lucky!... (read in full...)
We had dry sex, he had boxers on, I had none.
Q. ok me and my boyfriend have been together for awhile and were planning on gettin married but were waiting on the whole sex thing. but we have dry humpted more then 10 times he has had shorts and boxers on but i havent and yes he has came but from...
A. 17 March 2009: Star is right there is a chance! If you are going to do any "Humping" dry or full sex, he puts a condom on, it is the only safe way.... (read in full...)
Do guys need breathing space in a relationship every now and again?
Q. This is healthy in a relationship, right? My boyfriend wants to hang out with his guy friends I'd say it comes up about... once or twice a month. He text me this morning saying,'my buddy has an extra ticket for an event.' So, we'll go out on ...
A. 17 March 2009: YES!... (read in full...)
I need opinions here... Is it true...?
Q. Is it true that egg whites are safe to use as lube for sex and can they help you to get pregnant?...
A. 17 March 2009: Never heard of that one before but Salmonella is always an option!... (read in full...)
Do I need a Physiotherapist?
Q. hey i am 14 years old. i have been having some shoulder and back pain, mainly on the left side. it might be due to a heavy schoolbag or something, but ive been noticing a sharp pain i get sometimes near my neck/shoulder. its always in the same ...
A. 17 March 2009: Everyone has given great advise here but I am a firm beliver in early physio if you have easy access to a physio go and see one.
The sooner you see a physio the sooner they can check out your biometrics, and see what is causing the problems... (read in full...)
I had the flu and now I have unusually large amount of discharge
Q. I would really like some help. Lately I've had an unusually large amount of discharge. And I mean A LOT of discharge. It has started soaking through my jeans and I've never had it this bad. It looks like normal discharge and doesn't have a bad ...
A. 17 March 2009: As eyeswideopen said it could be a yeast infection brought on by antibiotics.
But flu, or should I say flu like symptoms can be a sign of other problems including STIs, I guessing at your age you won't have been silly enough to have had unprotec... (read in full...)
Is this a sign of an STD?
Q. hey like 3 weeks ago i was having lots of sex with my GF once a day at least but like recently ive found red spots that arent bumpy they go if i dont have sex/BJ for awhile but come back when i do, me and my GF where both virgins. is this a seri...
A. 16 March 2009: Are you sure she was a virgin? STIs can be passed orally too, so blow jobs can pass nastiness and her "Virginity" remains intact!
If you think you have got a problem down there see a doctor and get some sex education while you are there.
... (read in full...)
Do teachers ever have crushes on their students?
Q. Hello, all! I'm looking to hear from any teachers out there (especially young and/ or male ones) on the subject of student/ teacher relationships. I've noticed that there are countless posts on this website of students (especially females) declari...
A. 16 March 2009: Read this link by MusicalMistress: http://www.dearcupid.org/question/students-falling-in-love-with-teachers-whats-your.html she makes some interesting points, and this topic has been done to death on here, just search for crush or teacher!
You w... (read in full...)
Points to ponder on advise against teenage sex
Q. Out of curiosity, I was recently browsing through the advice I had given in the past 9 odd months I've been on this website. What struck me is how much "stern" I seem to be when giving advice to teenagers under 18 about sex. I frequently adv...
A. 16 March 2009: I have found myself asking the same questions, but having lots of 17-22 year old soldiers to look after, working in A&E departments and NHS Ambulances, I have realised how immature teenagers are on this subject, and not to forget how stupid I was at ... (read in full...)
Problem is he is my superior at work
Q. There is this guy at work and I am not sure if he likes me in that way. i think he does but i don't want to make a fool of myself. He's been texting at night and been so supportive during a very difficult time for me. Problem is he is my superior...
A. 16 March 2009: I have read a post on here by a girl who took the signs from a boss the wrong way, and ended up on a disciplinary for inappropriate behaviour and sexual harassment.
So on that note be very, very careful before making a move on your boss, if he is... (read in full...)
I have never expressed once that I could or would support her in this way
Q. since I've been with my girlfriend she has had maybe 5 or 6 different jobs, most last less than a month. the longest was at Macy's and that was 3 months working only weekends. she's not in school, she's not disabled, although she doesn't have any ...
A. 16 March 2009: Cat is right as usual.
But I wouldn't be that patient, I would probably suggest that she moves back in with her parents as you can't afford to "Keep her" any more.
There is no excuse for an intelligent, able bodied individual to get a job or ... (read in full...)
I'm four months pregnant and I feel so not sexy
Q. I'm four months pregnant and I feel so not sexy. The worst is that I feel like my husband does not want to have sex with me anymore. I've put on 8-9 lb and I feel like he does not like the way I look now. He still tells me I'm beautiful when I s...
A. 16 March 2009: I'm sure your boyfriend does still think you are beautiful, but does he know that he can still have sex with you when you are pregnant?
Most guys don't understand what you are going through and how unsexy you feel, the looking up dodgy stuff on... (read in full...)
It got completely out of control and the lie got so big, we couldn't back out of it
Q. Hi everyone I've been friends with a girl named Natalie for about 6 months now. She lives 40 minutes away from me. My friends that live close to me and I decided that it would be funny to lie to Natalie and tell her that I had this huge compli...
A. 16 March 2009: Your life isn't screwed! You've just been an idiot for your own amusement! If I were Natalie I wouldn't speak to you either, why should she decide to stay friends with someone who is a compulsive liar! (This is a real post and not a fake is it?)
... (read in full...)
I have way too much going on right now to think about a baby!
Q. i think i am prego! someone please help! i feel like my period is coming but it doesnt. i dont cramp or anything. but i just feel it i have been spottin a little bit of blood but it is not a lot. i am 19 years old. i work a full time job and a pa...
A. 16 March 2009: Firstly have you had unprotected sex? Or have you used an unreliable form of contraception? When is your period due?
Have you taken a pregnancy test?
There is an early abortion pill available that you can take up to 8 weeks into your pregnancy. A... (read in full...)
I have text him but he hasn't text back, now I'm so confused, what should I do?
Q. I met a guy and we were seeing each other for not quite 3 months, things were going extremely well until BAM! I was hospitalized, nothing life threatening but still hospitalized, he called when I was in the hospital but never came to visit me, (we ...
A. 16 March 2009: Was that the first and only time you slept with him?
If it was, I'm sorry but you have been used! I'm sure he'll call again next time he is in the mood, and will have some cock and bull story ready for you!... (read in full...)
I used a dildo & now I'm bleeding heavily...
Q. Ok this is going to sound stupid but i used a 6 inch dildo today and ever since i used that i have been bleeding alot and i mean alot, i have always been loosing like blood clots things as well and its really worrying me do any of you no whats wrong ...
A. 15 March 2009: You need to go to A&E right now! If you feel faint call an Ambulance! Don't be embarrassed we see this kind of stuff all the time!
Heavy bleeding is a very bad sign and the only people who can help are A&E Doctors. Read this then go straight... (read in full...)
My sister is having an affair with a married man with 3 kids!
Q. will i will just be brief here my 24 year old sister is having an affair with a 38 year old man who is married and has 3 kids.. he says he was never happy with his married life and was forced to marry this woman because of his casanova image a...
A. 15 March 2009: I agree with your morals but, it is your sisters life and she obviously doesn't have the same values and standards that you have.
Unfortunately whatever you say and do, it is her choice at the end of the day!... (read in full...)
Threesome--what is my girlfriend REALLY thinking?
Q. okies...im male, im 16 n i have a strange question... ive been going out with my girlfried for a year now! and things are great! i love her so much and unlike other teenage relationships this one has lasted really long... she is very cute! ...
A. 15 March 2009: Dude you seriously need to consider the implications of a THREESOME. I'm guessing as you can't spell yet that you are not the most mature of 16 year olds.
Having a threesome will probably involve your girlfriend and your ex having lots of fun toge... (read in full...)
Is it safe to fly to Spain, while I'm pregnant?
Q. Hi could someone help me i am currently 26 weeks and a few days pregnant and i am going on holiday to spain on tuesday i just wanted to know if it is safe to fly please let me know thank you x...
A. 15 March 2009: This is not a medical advise site! Although most of us give great advise often a 13 year old who has just asked am I pregnant will also answer questions like this!
This is why you need to talk to your Health Visitor, Midwife or Doctor, as they ... (read in full...)
Pregnant with Twins...can you help us decide on some names?
Q. My husband and i were having a debate about baby names, yes i'm pregnant with twins... and i said i'd put it to a poll. please could anyone who wants to decide from the six names below which one they prefer. i'm expecting a baby boy and a baby ...
A. 15 March 2009: Just think about how the names will affect the child rather than looking for something cute that suits a baby!
Too many children get bullied at school and having an unusual name or one that is simple to change to anything offensive is well wor... (read in full...)
Baby names...
Q. My bf and I were talking about baby names we want something unique and different but still cute. What do you think of the following names? BOYS: Flynn Owen (Owen is my bfs dad) Sloan Owen Makai (Ma-Ki) Owen Girls: Makenna Joy Arizona Jo...
A. 15 March 2009: Just think about how the names will affect the child rather than looking for something cute that suits a baby!
Too many children get bullied at school and having an unusual name or one that is simple to change to anything offensive is well wor... (read in full...)
Boyfriend has many issues
Q. I don't know how to stop him! My boyfriend, who is 20 has many issues like.. He smokes pot, drinks a lot, carries condoms and has sex with loads of prostitutes, been in trouble with the police for assault and shop lifting- I just don't know what to ...
A. 15 March 2009: YOU ARE AN IDIOT! What are you doing with this guy? And lying about your age too...
Come on sweetheart even you must realise you are better than this?... (read in full...)
Never saw him cum..pregnant?
Q. I never saw my ex partner pre cum and he always pull out..... Is there a chance i can be pregnant?? I never saw any coming? Please help.... ...
A. 15 March 2009: Yes there is a chance, and as Rebecca says there is still and STI risk!
The withdrawal method DOES NOT WORK! Any guy who thinks he has that much control, is very inexperienced or laying!... (read in full...)
Latex allergy or something else? Temporary relief?
Q. I had sex the other day with a new partner and we used a condom, and a vibrator. I took all the proper precautions, it wasnt my first time. But as time passed i started feeling dry and itchy and swollen. This has only happened to me one other time...
A. 15 March 2009: I think locking yourself away is a good option maybe a cool bath and some anti-histamines(hayfever pills) may help.... (read in full...)
Latex allergy or something else? Temporary relief?
Q. I had sex the other day with a new partner and we used a condom, and a vibrator. I took all the proper precautions, it wasnt my first time. But as time passed i started feeling dry and itchy and swollen. This has only happened to me one other time...
A. 15 March 2009: In the UK all medical personnel have to use Non-latex equipment, I think it is the same in the States, we use a latex replacement called Nitrile. So you could well have a latex allergy.
As Gina says you have done everything right so far, so see w... (read in full...)
How do I trust her when I know this guy wants her?
Q. I have been going out with my girlfriend for 4 years. Recently she has made friends with a guy who I think just wants to get into her pants. She wants to go and hang out with him. She says she won't let anything happen and I do trust her but she ...
A. 15 March 2009: If you are being controlling and showing her you don't trust her, you will push her into the arms of another man!... (read in full...)
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